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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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What can be done to get her to want me again? And why is she not discouraging her ex from reaching out to her?
Q. My GF and I been dating for 2 years. She's had a very "liberal" sexual past. Threesomes, group sex, other women, etc. We started off very hot and heavy. And after a few months, she moved in late last year. I've noticed over the past few months t...
A. 2 April 2013: I think the only thing you did to cause this is to live with her. Did she care how much money people made when she had those threesomes? I don't think so. If she is shutting down like that, not even kissing and hugging it could mean she is not the ... (read in full...)
He's confused me. Should I be concerned? He tells me he likes me, but he doesn't really act much on it.
Q. I met this guy through friends years ago but he lived in a different state. He recently moved to my town and we connected through facebook and started going out on dates. The first time we went out he tried to kiss me but I backed away and ...
A. 2 April 2013: He likes you enough that he wants you to be the person to welcome him in the city, but not enough to actually date you. He doesn't want you to go in case that he can't find someone else. A person who is tired should not be dating until he's all ... (read in full...)
I don't know how to play the game of being chased
Q. I have a problem with being pursued by men/boys. I don't know what is wrong with me but I don't know how to let a man/boy pursue me and work for me and my attention. It causes problems because I always drive away the boys that I like because of my ...
A. 1 April 2013: Playing the game invovles not calling the guy when you miss him. Asking him for help when you rather just do it yourself. Getting busy when you really want to be with him. Waiting for sex even when you are super horny. Be that dainty, delicate ... (read in full...)
I think I made a mistake by judging his past?
Q. I fell head over heels in love with a man.He was 10 years younger than me. He was a serial cheater. Cheated on his exwife cheated on his ex girlfirends and cheated on his last girlfriend to be with me. It was perfect for 8 months. I knew he was ...
A. 31 March 2013: I would judge his present and the past. He has nothing else to offer you but cards, flowers and texts. And you know a relationship needs so much more than that. It's normal to regret a break up. Don't make a mistake by getting back to him because ... (read in full...)
I want a FWB relationship that is exclusive with him
Q. I have a friends with 'some' benefits type of relationship going with a very hot n sexy guy. He's the hottest guy I've ever laid eyes on, and he makes me wanna just be free and not hold back in any way, or I might regret it. However, becau...
A. 29 March 2013: I think he meant he had a lot of experience, so he is not over excited about an opportunity to have sex. He is not missing anything if there's no sex for 4 months. He wants sex to be carefree. For him you asked too many questions and to took away ... (read in full...)
Is boyfriend's behavior common for a depressed person?
Q. Okay so it's been a while since I last posted but just a quick back ground on my relationship. I've been with my bf/ fiancee for two years 3 months ( we got engaged about a year ago) we have a one yr old daughter and I'm currently 8 1/2 months ...
A. 29 March 2013: For just depression, no. There's also mania and depression, alternating between the two. Words to describe depression is stupor, and unfeeling, which is the opposite of how your fiancee behaved.
Depression is not an excuse for throwing things and ... (read in full...)
I am not sure if my boyfriend is proposing or just hinting at marriage.
Q. I'm having this strong feeling in my gut but I might be wrong but my boyfriend of nearly five months kept hinting about marriage, adopting kids, living together, etc...I am not 100% sure but I think he's trying to find a way to propose in a funny ...
A. 29 March 2013: An official proposal invovles a ring. Throughout the relationship people suggests things and try to gauge your reaction to it. He doesn't have to be ready for it either. Talking about the future just makes the relationship secure, and it gives it ... (read in full...)
Should I just stay out of it, and not offer my opinion? Is it his choice alone to plan ahead, or not plan ahead?
Q. I just had a fight with my bf and I don't understand what went wrong. He's been in school for the past year and a half getting an associate degree and planning on going to a different college next. He's also 32. The argument was about why he's g...
A. 28 March 2013: If you have only been dating for months then I would say stay out of it. If you intend to marry him in the future and your money would be combined, then you should be concerned. Men and women are supposed to be equal but men still think they should ... (read in full...)
Not totally sure if I am friendzoned or still have chance or even missed my chance.
Q. Hi, so I'm trying to get some help with my situation because I am quite confused. This might be a little long too so I apologize. Little backstory: I've met this girl in college about 2 years ago. She's since graduated and I am little less than...
A. 28 March 2013: I don't think you can call that friendzone when you had known her for two years. When you are in college your decision to date others is affected by where you will live after graduation. My definition of friendzone is that two people (never met each ... (read in full...)
Dealing with my wife's past...need help
Q. I’ve been married for 6 months now and I have been with my wife for 1 ½ years. We are both Christians, but we met while we were in our previous marriages. I found out early in the relationship that she had an affair about 9 years earlier with a ...
A. 28 March 2013: It puzzles me how you can overlook the cheating part and focus on something so miniscule compared to what she had done. She cheated 3 whole years. She did not respect her ex husband, and the trooper's wife. This is not someone who showed remorse ... (read in full...)
Does the depth of a woman reveal if she was sleeping with another person?
Q. I have been having sex with my lady friend for over 15 years and I used to be able to hit the back wall of her vagina because she used to say it hurt when I went to deep we had broken up for a little while she said that she did not sleep with nobody ...
A. 26 March 2013: No. A long penis does not have the ability the push a cervix back, and it returns to its normal form after the sex. A woman's cycle also affects her vagina. A lot of accuse on women sleeping with other men due to looseness, dryness, how it feels or ... (read in full...)
Is it too much to expect that he at least acknowledge the gift?
Q. Dear Cupid I bought a really expensive gift for my bf and sent it to him. He received his gift today and i called him to check whether he liked it or not, even sent him a message. No response for anything. I called again and he yelled at me...
A. 26 March 2013: He has no manners or he didn't really expect this gift. Nowhere did you say it was his birthday. I think he was mentioning something he wants for a long time but was surprised you actually bought it for him. His lack of response says something about ... (read in full...)
I have no experience -- help me read the signs that might tell me she wants me to make a move
Q. hi, i have met this girl through a mate and we are kind of getting with each other privately just to see how it goes, we allways get off with each other, snog and stuff, but i would like some advice on taking it further... im still a virgin so ...
A. 24 March 2013: You've done snogging and I imagine you had that talk about experience. She knew you are a virgin so she won't expect too much from you. She sounds like she is not against a bit of fun although you can never tell when she is ready for sex. You can do ... (read in full...)
I'm worried that my partner may have ADHD so how can I address this? Should I ask him or get him to see a Doctor?
Q. modnote: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attention_deficit_hyperactivity_disorder Hi there, I hope you can help!! My boyfriend and I have only been together a few months, but I have noticed a few things which are already starting to put pressure...
A. 24 March 2013: I would only get people with ADHD to get help when their disorder interferes with normal life like getting up and going to work on time, eating and sleeping normally. I don't like people who smoke though. It's a deal breaker for me.
If the list... (read in full...)
What can I do? I Slept with BF's best friend, broke up with BF, but still can't stop thinking about his best friend.
Q. Hi everyone I've now found myself in this awkward predicament, please give me some advice. Three months ago I made a huge mistake. I cheated on my now ex-boyfriend with our mutual male best friend. The friend and I have always had a close rel...
A. 24 March 2013: Your friend does not have your best interests in heart. He saw that you were vulnerable for affections. He took advantage of that and you gave in. He would not be a good boyfriend material but I wouldn't even want to be his FWB. You can have ... (read in full...)
I am his Gf yet he treats me like the other woman. Should I end this relationship? Worse, he's also started being mean to me
Q. I need some sort of advice, i been driving myself crazy going over and over this issue in my head. I am single no kids never been married. I been dating this man for 3 years things were great as any relationship it has its up and downs. Some of h...
A. 24 March 2013: I think he had decided to get back with his ex. Financially it's easier and he gets to be with his son more often, if they had a child together. He's asking you to understand his cowardly way of expressing it. Not meeting you, not talking, and being ... (read in full...)
He was my first love. Breaking up has been so difficult. How can I remove this pit of sorrow from my heart?
Q. Four months ago, my relationship of over a year came to an end. At the time, we both felt that it was the right thing to do as our arguments were becoming more frequent and the general chemistry was lacking. I had been contemplating br...
A. 24 March 2013: When people want to start a new chapter in life they do things that are out of ordinary. Like a new hair cut, going to the gym and starting a new hobby. The changes may not last long but they will launch a new path and help refresh the mind. I ... (read in full...)
I don't know my feelings for her. How can I get her to trust me?
Q. I asked this question before but i only got two responses and whilst i apreciate(appreciate?) them i would be grateful(greatful?) for more insight... I just turned sixteen a month ago and started voluntary work around the same time once a week...
A. 23 March 2013: She isn't sure what she wants from you but at least she likes talking to you during lunch. I wouldn't advise doing much more than lunch as she is busy with taking care of grandpa. She can be very sensitive to pressure. She likes you somewhat because ... (read in full...)
I need this crush to end now before I do something stupid and I don't know how
Q. I'm in my early 20's and infatuated by this guy at work who is older than me. (late thirties) He's gorgeous for his age , rough,masculine and he's such a laugh...... I think about him day and night , dream about him. The sexual tension between ...
A. 23 March 2013: As long as it remains a crush, you won't do something to actualize the fantasy, like hanging out and letting him take you somewhere. I find masturbation as a very healthy outlet. Crushes fill your imagination. It gives you a reason to wake up in the ... (read in full...)
My fiance did nothing inappropriate at the bachelor party, but I am still upset that he felt horny nonetheless.
Q. Hello. Im in a relationship since 5 years and we are now engaged, hope to be married in start of next year. Trust and girls have never been an issue in my relationship as my guy is not the sort who is a flirt. He visits foreign countries a lot ...
A. 22 March 2013: Your fiance did not expect it would get so wild. If he knew there would actually be sex, I think he would refuse to go and be associated with people willing to cheat in the name of the rite of passage into manhood.
Just because something is immo... (read in full...)
Boyfriend kissed a friend who likes him. I know he might let this happen again. What should I do?
Q. I know a lot of people don't believe that kissing someone else is cheating but i do. Anyways, my boyfriend and I have been dating since June 2011, I didn't know at the time we began dating that one of his friends had feelings for him. He told me ...
A. 21 March 2013: This is a big deal. At first I thought the kiss was like a friendly peck on the face. A kiss on the back is more than friendly, it's like adoration and combined with pages of messaging it was cheating. Why two girls like him so much is beyond me. He ... (read in full...)
Is he playing with my emotions?
Q. I met this guy from a friend of mine a year ago, and I started developing feeling for him. He initiated the first meeting, and took me to the "City" and everything was fine for a couple of dates. One day he started being really obnoxious, telling ...
A. 20 March 2013: Everything you do is a test that's designed to fail you. It doesn't matter what you do, what you say, it's never good enough for him. If you have any more questions about him, the answer is that he's trying to test you and see what's wrong with you ... (read in full...)
My American wife has accused me of getting married for a Green Card, what should I do now?
Q. 6 months ago , I got married to US citizen in Pakistan. We met through dating site and after four months she came to Pakistan to marry me. After honeymoon,once she got back to US, she filled Spouse Visa Petition for me. One month ago, we had a ...
A. 18 March 2013: You don't need to prove anything because I bet your wife would not want any more contact from you. You should ask the Visa Centre to see if the marriage would be annulled by itself with an incomplete application. I think your wife changed her mind ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants to rent the living room at a female friend's and I don't trust her.
Q. My boyfriend and I have almost been together 3 years. We've had our ups and downs numerous times but we love each other very much. I will do anything to be with him for the rest of my life. But now, we have yet another problem that I'm having an ...
A. 17 March 2013: I wonder why it takes him more than 4 months to look for a place. Why didn't he sign another year's lease? Why would he put himself in a situation where he has to struggle to find a place to live?
His friend's fiance trusts him enough that noth... (read in full...)
How can I show my ex that I am not needy?
Q. In January my girlfriend broke up with me after almost six years together. She said she just doesn't feel that spark and is not sure if she ever has. Six years is a long time to figure that out. Recently, I found a letter she had written to someone ...
A. 17 March 2013: I will tell you to screw the chances and just be the best you can. She had been emotionally cheating on you if it wasn't for that coworker it would be another girl in the future. She already had one foot out the door.
Prepare for a new place to l... (read in full...)
My boyfriend sexualises women and makes dirty comments!
Q. My bf Of 4 years has a bad habbit of commenting when an attracive woman walks by us if we are out. He knows i dont like it but tells me he cant help it ( which i dont buy). He will make sounds, his draw may drop or goes "whoa" and even turn ar...
A. 17 March 2013: He's at an age where he should have self control so "can't help it" is not an excuse. 30 years later he will be called a creepy old fart.
Making comments about your friend being hot is unacceptable.
The reason why he is with you and not those ey... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is not "the one". I don't even know if such a person exists for me?
Q. I'm 25, I'm in a relationship of 7 months and my boyfriend is not THE ONE. He does have some qualities I admire in a man, but there are some things missing. Most of all, I like men who are a bit "hard to catch" emotionally, who know how to puzzle ...
A. 16 March 2013: You want a man who is sophisticated. Of course such men exist. Usually older, with advanced degrees and working in a field that has a good impact in the world. Or a creative, eccentric who thinks outside of the box. Sometimes a person like that is ... (read in full...)
Need to get back into the game after a long dry spell
Q. Dear all, I guess I am going through some sort of emotional crisis lately. I am 29 and have been single for 3 years now. Basically, I have only had one single long-term relationship in my life, which lasted for 3 years. Breaking up with my ex wa...
A. 14 March 2013: You have to let yourself loose and have fun. I think the girls were uninterested because at first they look for attraction, not connection. They might say no to first date sex, but secretly they want the men to want them that way. Sorry to say but ... (read in full...)
Single for two years -- how will guys react?
Q. GUYS: what do you think of a girl that's been single for 2 years? I've been single for 2years now and I don't feel like been with anyone. Guys tell me I'm cute and sexy and they wanna get to know me and take me out etc: But I'm neve...
A. 14 March 2013: The question after you is the male version of you. He hasn't been dating for 3 years. Somehow guys get hit harder when they don't get girls because they are supposed to be pursuers. They are supposed to have the skill to pick up girls, whether their ... (read in full...)
Why am I such a mess after we went from a relationship, to casual dating to her breaking it off with me to be with a new man?
Q. So my gf broke up with me after 7 months and I don't know why I am so upset? We told each other we loved each other but I could never bring myself to seeing her 2-3 times a week. I enjoy my alone time so I tend to spend it with myself. A few weeks ...
A. 13 March 2013: You are in a mess because seeing them together in a facebook brought back painful memories of your ex wife leaving you for another man. You asked this question right after mentioning that it's not the money issue and the guy is fat. Exactly, she ... (read in full...)
Really Stressed or she dosn't love me anymore
Q. HI! Been with my girlfriend now for nearly a year (11 months to be exact)like any couple we have our ups and downs but latley im having trouble trying to work out if she still loves me or just really stressed out. she has become difficult to tal...
A. 13 March 2013: It sounds like she put up a wall and developped a strong woman persona to protect herself. It is reaction formation from what happened in her past. She thinks being smart and independent will prevent her from getting hurt by jerks. Now I see that ... (read in full...)
Sleep deprived boyfriend has money for everything except an engagement ring. Should I cut my losses?
Q. My boyfriend is sleep deprived. He gets about 4 hours of sleep per night. It's almost like a badge of honor for him that he works nights. He often talks about "day" people who get up in the morning, go to work and come home and eat dinner like ...
A. 13 March 2013: This man sounds dreadful. You never listed one single positive trait about him, only he makes a lot of money but you can't touch any of it. I think he tricked you into thinking that marriage is a good thing since it is a hard goal to reach and it's ... (read in full...)
I don't get why we're not seeing more of each other, does he want me or not?
Q. Hi all, just looking for a bit of advice from a male and female perspective. About a month ago, I started dating a guy from work. We get on very well, have same sense of humour and he's the first guy I've wanted to date since a bad break up 18 ...
A. 12 March 2013: You are seeing each other only twice a month. I won't even call that dating. You are only hanging out. You say you don't want to rush things, but honestly there is no thing. When you see each other so little you don't get to connect at a level that ... (read in full...)
Are we just friends with benefits, or something more?
Q. I was casually seeing this guy for a month when he ended it saying that something had happened with another girl. We ended amicably, no feelings hurt. A week later a group of us went out and luckily it wasn't awkward between us. In fact we spent ...
A. 12 March 2013: He wants to be a friend to you, but you to act like a girlfriend. He can have as many girls as he wants but his girls can only have him alone. He's this way to you so you won't think about having other guys. To the extreme a guy can fake a ... (read in full...)
Why am I such a mess after we went from a relationship, to casual dating to her breaking it off with me to be with a new man?
Q. So my gf broke up with me after 7 months and I don't know why I am so upset? We told each other we loved each other but I could never bring myself to seeing her 2-3 times a week. I enjoy my alone time so I tend to spend it with myself. A few weeks ...
A. 12 March 2013: Yes, the term breaking up has many aliases. It's very heavy loaded. It involves messy emotions so people try to lighten it up with vagueness so they can move on without fuss. They think at least they have the intentions behind it and they wait for ... (read in full...)
Really Stressed or she dosn't love me anymore
Q. HI! Been with my girlfriend now for nearly a year (11 months to be exact)like any couple we have our ups and downs but latley im having trouble trying to work out if she still loves me or just really stressed out. she has become difficult to tal...
A. 12 March 2013: The words I would describe her would be overachiever, workaholic, a do-it-all, independent to a fault, and cares about image a lot. A person who thrives on stress. She likes to get herself so busy that she can brag and complain about her busyness. ... (read in full...)
We broke up, but recently started casually meeting plus sex. How can I deal with this? I want more than what's happening now.
Q. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for over a year now. We split up because we are still young and we had different interests in life. Recently we have been meeting up and sleeping together, I was ok at first and thought it would be ...
A. 12 March 2013: If you got back together you will eventually confront the same problems that caused you to break up. I believe that casual sex is only manageable with people you don't know well and don't intend to. You can talk to him and risk him not wanting to ... (read in full...)
Could I actually be held accountable for her ending her life by her own hand and free will?
Q. Hello everyone. Well I've been getting close to a woman online for about 5 months, we got along great and were planning to continue getting to know each other and see where things lead. However, last week I found out she is married with 3 c...
A. 12 March 2013: No. What you should do is contact the National Suicide Prevention hotline about her. They might even advise you what to do. There are chances she won't do this, and that she only said these things to regain control of the situation. When I read " ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his friends are all I have. I fear so much of losing this relationship.
Q. I have been in a relationship with a man for a couple of years now. Like any other relationship, we've had some problems and stuff, nothing too major. I have some serious problems. I hate the feeling of being left and lonely. My boyfriend and his ...
A. 12 March 2013: Some people, like me, are not interested in keeping in touch with people. Some people only socialize because it makes them feel normal. I don't even bother with it.
Break ups hurt so much because I put so much aspirations, and all my energies into... (read in full...)
Are his jokes showing that he doesn't want me in the future?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 7 months..we are in our late twenties and still living with parents due to us trying to save individually for the future..he is looking to purchase a house within the next few years. It is by far t...
A. 12 March 2013: If he wants to know your intention, jokes are not the nice way to go. He has to pluck up the courage to directly ask you, when he is ready. The way I would respond to his first 'joke', would be to say it would be nice to have my own apartment.
I... (read in full...)
Why do I always want the ex that I don't have?
Q. Got a problem and i have no idea why i cant deal with it. So I've just got back with my ex(2), we broke up maybe a year ago but now i cant seem to get over the fact my most recent ex(1) is happy without me and i seem drawn to her again. Howeve...
A. 11 March 2013: You have no more incentive to chase what you already have. The only guys who woo girls everyday are the ones who are scared of losing them if they stop, or mature guys who learn to care for others more than themselves. Also guys who don't want to be ... (read in full...)
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