Was my girlfriend cheating with another guy over Skype?
Q. I've been skeptical of my girlfriend's fidelity to me for a while and have reason to suspect that she may be deceiving me and cheating. Recently, I returned home to visit family and I decided to Skype with her to see how she was doing. When we c...
A. 4 August 2013: Well, now you know, she wasn't a Keeper, she was a OH MY GOODNESS I DODGED A BULLET!
What a cow.
... (read in full...)
Worried that ex friend is vengeful after she found me on facebook.
Q. Hello dear Aunts, Thank you for being here for every problem all of us have. Well my problem is about an ex-friend of mine. She was mean and abusive (both psychological and physical abuse), so i ended the friendship and moved away about a year and...
A. 2 July 2013: Block her from your stuff.... (read in full...)
My friend thinks I'm spoiling my husband.
Q. Dear cupid My friend Debbie moved an hour and a half away a few years ago so we don't get to see each other as often as we use to. Debbie wants me to come and spent a weekend with her but my husband feels like why i cant just go and return ho...
A. 2 July 2013: I know my husband would be OK with it, I just never had the desire to do something like that.
What do you think?
Personally, I think if YOU and YOUR husband are OK with it, it's all good, if you are not then don't. BUT... I'd love to know why... (read in full...)
Cheating casual relationship goes wrong.
Q. OK I'm not innocent and I know this, but I have been seeing a guy off and on for about 3 years who has a girlfriend. At first he didn't tell me about her and I soon found out and ended the casual relationship. Last year he got back in contact with ...
A. 1 July 2013: Trying to determine WHO to is to BLAME in this situation is pointless.
He is doing wrong because he is ALREADY in a relationship, BUT you are wrong too, you KNOW/KNEW this and still continued being his dish on the side, hoping he would realize ... (read in full...)
I can't say no to sex and being labelled by my friends. Please help me, I keep getting hurt over and over!
Q. I have a lot of guy problems, so ill explain where it all came from. Im 17 years old. I lost my virginity at 14. To a 19 year old, it was forced and I was Hammered. I had never even made out with a guy before him. Then i waited nearly a year be...
A. 1 July 2013: I think you have somehow made sex = love. IF you give a guy sex, he might like/love you. But that is not how it works. I think you know that intellectually, but you are ignoring it, because others have ignored your feelings too and just used you.
... (read in full...)
Should I put spyware on boyfriends phone?
Q. Hi Agony Aunties and Uncles, Thank you for taking the time to read this. I am aware that I am being extreme and have crossed some privacy boundaries, but before I take it to another extreme I thought I would check in with the community. I ...
A. 1 July 2013: I think putting spyware on is ludicrous to be really frank. You don't OWN him, nor do you pay his cell phone bill. Just because you are dating someone it doesn't ( I will repeat) it DOESN'T give you the right to go through his phone.
I can unde... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend ignoring me?
Q. So my boyfriend hasn't talked to me in 6 days , he's been talking to literally everybody .. Except me. And he's going to the beach with 2 really pretty girls on Friday .. But I'm not going . I know I sound over protective but I don't know what to do ...
A. 1 July 2013: I would have called him too, just to let him know that it's over, I agree you can't ignore your partner, BUT I don't believe that it is ALWAYS the guy's "job" to call the girl.
... (read in full...)
I'm tempted to have an affair with my hot co-worker to get back at my husband for the pain he put me through 3 years ago
Q. I am currently married for 3 yrs now. However, my husband and i had many issues in the beginning of our relationship when we were dating. he didnt tell me that he was still emailing his exgirlfriend because he told me she wanted to end her life so ...
A. 29 June 2013: So tit for tat is how you want to live your life?
If you are still not over something he did 3 years ago, maybe it's time to reevaluate the marriage and decide if it's worth working on or not. But cheating is not going to help you OR your marriage... (read in full...)
How can I be the love of her life one day, then absolutely nothing the next day?
Q. I've posted on here a couple of times recently. I had some great feedback. Basically, it was about my ex. She's been so on again-off again with me. One minute I'm the love of her life and she wants to live with me, marry me and have a family with ...
A. 29 June 2013: She doesn't know what she wants. I think she LOVES the idea of you two but not the reality of it.
Look at her actions only, for a few. IS THAT someone you want to be with? Filter out the sweet talk.... (read in full...)
Was my girlfriend cheating with another guy over Skype?
Q. I've been skeptical of my girlfriend's fidelity to me for a while and have reason to suspect that she may be deceiving me and cheating. Recently, I returned home to visit family and I decided to Skype with her to see how she was doing. When we c...
A. 29 June 2013: Honestly I think if she was busy with a guy she would make up an excuse and get off Skype.
I think you have a VERY active imagination and you need to learn how to trust. If you think she would cheat the minute you are out the door, then maybe sh... (read in full...)
Am I the bad guy for making my girlfriend breakdown?
Q. For more info on this, please read (or skim) this question: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-believe-my-girlfriend-is-lying-about-an.html. This problem of mine goes back almost a year. I haven't been able to shake this feeling of mine that the...
A. 29 June 2013: You should just END it with her. You will NEVER get over the "imagination sex" she might or might NOT have had BEFORE you two even started dating.
Leave her be and get a fresh start with someone else. The girl deserves better and you can't gi... (read in full...)
We have sex 3 times a week, what can I do to boost my sex drive?
Q. Hello dear cupid I have a serious issue. ..I am 22 and my fiance is 27 we have a great relationship outside of the sex department. ...we have a handsome 9 month old, truly faithful to one another, and pursuing to be successful for our family...the ...
A. 29 June 2013: First of all your body and hormones are not quite yet back to "normal" for some women that never happens after giving birth, but I would suggest you talk to your doctor. It could be you are hormonal imbalanced.
3 times a week isn't bad (or out ... (read in full...)
Fat Issues and lots of Tissues: Question is, why would I stay in a relationship where I have to change to suit his ideals?
Q. Fat issues and tissues So my SO keeps calling me a fatso. Mmm that's abusive. I need to loose, for myself, 20 lbs Also in menopause and also 52 years old. But I'm very active, trying now to boost my metabolism I have put my relationship...
A. 28 June 2013: I think the biggest lesson here is that you said, no I'm not taking this kind of crap from a person who is supposed to love me.
If YOU are happy with YOU - then FUCK (pardon my English) what anyone else thinks.
I don't believe in changing for ... (read in full...)
I’m afraid my impatience and my willingness to speak my mind, totally unabridged, will cause more harm than good
Q. For a 20 year old, I’m not very attached to my phone. Call me old fashioned, but I’d rather talk face to face, enjoy personal contact. And sure, I use email for work and school, and find time to text girlfriends, but as a single guy, I enjoy my ...
A. 28 June 2013: Why not CALL her instead of a text? Just make the conversation short and sweet ( nothing sexual or romantic) and that might give HER something to thing about till you see each other again, or.. she calls/text you back.... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend ignoring me?
Q. So my boyfriend hasn't talked to me in 6 days , he's been talking to literally everybody .. Except me. And he's going to the beach with 2 really pretty girls on Friday .. But I'm not going . I know I sound over protective but I don't know what to do ...
A. 28 June 2013: Have you tried picking up a phone and calling him? ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't my boyfriend look for a job like he said he would?
Q. Hello, My boyfriend has asked to be left alone at the moment. However, I dont know why. Before he texted me this, we had a quick mobile conversation about him saying that he's been feeling down recently because he doesn't have much money. Which I ...
A. 28 June 2013: He is upset because you pointed out a "flaw" or something that is pretty obvious. No job = no money. I guess he could have read it as YOU telling HIM he's no good because he has no job.
Or maybe he expected you to give him a pity party and you ... (read in full...)
My B/f keeps interrogating me about my past and if he were to ever find out I have lied, he will end things. What should I do?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and he is te type of person that just about interrogates me about guys in my past. I have nothing to be ashamed about and have only been with one person before him. He always asks about stupid things ...
A. 28 June 2013: I would sit him down and tell him how it makes you feel when he wants to dig around in the past.
He NEEDS to stop. And probably get some help for that retrograde jealousy thing. It's NOT helpful for anyone, not you, not him, no one.... (read in full...)
Should I go back on Facebook?
Q. I used to be on Facebook and closed my account about 3 years ago, looking back i can say i did it because I didn't feel it was my thing, but at the same time I could see the advantages of having easy access to people that you wouldn't necessarily go ...
A. 28 June 2013: I deleted my Facebook because some people got way to annoying with their constant lame unimportant updates and crap, I just personally didn't see the point. Instead I call/e-mail those whom I like to keep in touch with.
Would I have a Facebook... (read in full...)
We just met and he told me how much he loves me, and that we could be friends with benefits if I'm not ready for a relationship!
Q. Hi. I only met this guy who is of the same age as me, [mod note; age 17] 2days ago. He was very kind, everyone seems to enjoy his company. Yesterday he asked for my phone no. and i gave it to him without any hesitation and anxiety. Later on that day ...
A. 28 June 2013: I agree - it's not love, it's manipulation.
He wants sex and is hoping by telling you he LUVS you, you will comply.... (read in full...)
Do you think he misses me and is starting to think he made a mistake or is he just being insensitive and doesn't realize that I need more time to get over him before we can be friends?
Q. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 6 months. He said he cared about me and loved me but he wasn't in love with me. I had already told him that I love him. It's been 2 weeks and in that time he has sent me text messages acting like we're best ...
A. 28 June 2013: No, I don't think he realized he made a mistake. He regarded you as a friend (and this not IN love with you) and he still does.
Cut the contact, because you are wasting your time hoping he will change his mind.... (read in full...)
Will he ever say "I love you"?
Q. hello everyone.....I have a question which may sound silly but its really messing with my emotions right now. I met this guy we have been officially going out for nearly 2 months. I told him I loved him which I know I do so please don't say I cant...
A. 28 June 2013: Does he SHOW you he cares? It's ONLY been 2 months. JUST because you were/are ready to say the L word doesn't mean he is, but hopefully he is able to SHOW you for now.
And trying to goad or pressure him into saying isn't a good idea. Do you want... (read in full...)
Why did my ex send me a photo of him and his new girl?
Q. So my ex boyfriend and I haven't talked since we broke up. He has nerve to send me a picture of him and his new girl. I'm not going to lie, it did break me. I was getting over him and I'm happy for him but why would he do that? ... I need help:-(...
A. 28 June 2013: Please don't play his game, just IGNORE it.
He wanted to get a reaction, ANY reaction from you. Most likely to make you jealous or to plain out hurt your feelings. Either way, if you continue to ignore it, he "lost" his little game.
And a g... (read in full...)
Uncomfortable about what happened, should I bring it up or pretend it never happened?
Q. Hello cupids. Last night a family friend asked me to spend the night at his house, his mom whom Im very close with wanted me to stay as well because it would be fun.. I am twenty two and thought it would be a little weird since he is sixteen. He a...
A. 28 June 2013: I would definitely have a word with him. That is WAY wrong and I'm sure he knows that too.
If he thinks THAT is OK, what else will he "think" is OK to do to a "girl"?... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to send my ex bf's stuff back to him?
Q. My ex and I broke up three months ago. I initiated the breakup because we were in LDR and he drifted apart. I told him a hundred times if he had no love for me, please just feel free to tell me, I would understand since it's so difficult to be ...
A. 28 June 2013: I see nothing wrong in returning them, it would be a good way for you to let "go" of him and the past.
Just don't engage in any conversations/texts about the shirts or anything else with him.
... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to feel a little bit hurt by this? I spent 5 years letting his mother say what she wanted to me and after I finally stand up for myself he goes round like nothing happened?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles Got a problem, I've been with my bf now for 5 years his family have never really accepted me in all this time and thing got worse when I went into an apprenticeship rather than go to university. My bf moved in with me and my f...
A. 28 June 2013: You need to learn to ignore them. There is no way else to deal with a person like that, specially when you have a BF who can't or won't stand up to his mom.
As for taking the games/controller to their house, I would tell him in the future that it ... (read in full...)
Do women get wet panties without physical stimulation?
Q. Women do you get wet panties - in a sexual sense - without getting physical? By this I mean without someone physically stimulating you. Several years ago a girl I was friendly with came round to my flat and had a quick shower after work.W...
A. 28 June 2013: First of all she must have sat with very wide spread legs for you to catch that glimpse...
And secondly, yes - visual & auditory stimulation works for both MEN and WOMEN in getting aroused.... (read in full...)
My cheating ex is making me feel bad because I had a one night stand after we broke up. Am I in the wrong?
Q. Me and my boyfriend broke up around about 3 weeks ago due to him cheating on me. He's cheated on me multiple times, and now I've had enough, we broke up and ended and the break up has been challenging to say the least. ...
A. 26 June 2013: I would leave the T-shirts out on the front step so he can come pick them up, but YOU do NOT owe him an explanation or clarification of YOUR actions.
You were broken up, you slept with someone, so what? If the guy you slept with is single there is... (read in full...)
Is it common for men in committed relationships to engage in behaviors like this with another woman? Why is he doing this?
Q. I'm a single female and a few months ago, had a chance to get to know a male colleague of mine who's located in a city 4 hours away. We hit it off immediately and very quickly became friends though common interests. After our first meet, we have not ...
A. 26 June 2013: Honestly I wouldn't worry so much about why HE is doing this, I would worry about WHY you are.
You know he is in a committed relationship, so technically he should be off limits. If this was a friendship I doubt you would feel ashamed of what's g... (read in full...)
Overreacting to a Missed Happy Birthday?
Q. I have a really good friend that lives in another state. Overall he is a really good guy and his birthday was a few months ago. I sent him a "birthday" package with a few items. I also made sure to wish him a Happy Birthday as well on his special ...
A. 26 June 2013: I have to agree with C. Grant.
... (read in full...)
Think the best thing I can do at this point is to just stay silent for "a couple weeks" like she originally said, and then maybe try to call her and see what's up... what do you guys think?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for two years recently she's been being a bit distant, she tells me she's spending time with family/working on career/etc. which is all totally fine, because everyone needs time for themselves, but she's been seein...
A. 26 June 2013: I think you have walked around egg-shells enough. I would call her and talk. Preferably find a day she can be "bothered" to see you face to face and talk abut what's up.
Sounds to me like she is done with the relationship but doesn't have the "bal... (read in full...)
Is the purpose of sex to orgasm or to feel close and intimate with your partner?
Q. Okay so I'm 20 and recently started having sex with the guy that I'm seeing (he's 21). I lost my virginity to him, but we have only had sex about 3 times since that. Before we had sex, he would play with me down there. Now he doesn't, I think ...
A. 26 June 2013: I think he is using statistics to be lazy. YES, MOST women do NOT orgasm from PENETRATION, but that doesn't mean they don't ORGASM from sex. Basically it means that INSERTION of HIS weiner is less "important" when it comes to female orgasm. Which in ... (read in full...)
7 years and I'm still not over my ex, help?
Q. Hi everyone, This might be quite long but I'm in dire need of some advice...i can't really talk to anyone else about this situation...Here goes: When i was about 17 i randomly met a guy at a gig, i can still remember it like it was yesterday, i...
A. 25 June 2013: I dated a guy from I was 19 til we were 23, he was my first real BF and to this day, he will always hold a special place in my heart. I did compare EVERY other gay to him and yes, they all feel short.
It is NOT uncommon that (at least in our mind... (read in full...)
My boyfriend can't enjoy sex when we use condoms
Q. I have a problem, my boyfriend cant seem to enjoy sex when we use a condom he even gets soft, and if i was on birth control would be a good fix if i could do it, but the hormones don't do me good, i get really sick, i also cant afford to get the ...
A. 25 June 2013: There are many types of condoms out there that can help him "feel" more so to speak. And quite honestly, I think it's your only choice for now. It's not like condoms are too small is it? Because you can fit a foot in those things!
My guess is... (read in full...)
Should my friend's children be allowed to walk around nude at the ages they are?
Q. I have a friend who lets her kids (a boy age 12 and a girl age 8) walk around the house naked. I have watched the kids on occasion, and they had been naked when I got there and their mother never told them to get dressed. Is this a problem? It ...
A. 25 June 2013: I would honestly, be uncomfortable watching other people's kids who at those ages were running around the house nude. Now I get that if they are walking from bathroom to their own room after a shower, that I don't see the problem at all.
And i... (read in full...)
Why is my ex contacting me and even wanting to have a pajama party??
Q. I havn't seen my ex boyfriend who dumped and left me alone in another state for nearly 3 months though he has phoned me regularly like once a week since leaving. I have now returned to the same state as him and been here for 3 weeks. He has done ...
A. 25 June 2013: IF he wants his stuff back - tell him to come pick it up ( you pick the time and place) and after that block/delete/remove him from your life.
Looks like he thinks you are game for some NSA sex.
Unless you want him to hurt you some more, you r... (read in full...)
My Boyfriend thinks I'm a masochist! Am I???
Q. Please don't judge me. I am 18 yrs old. Im a very quiet and shy person. I have only had sex with one guy which is my boyfriend. My bf and i have sex alot and its always the pain that turns me on. My favorite is the neck biting. I like for him to ...
A. 25 June 2013: First off, being a masochistic is not mainly about degradation. The definition is, an individual deriving pleasure and gratification from receiving physical pain and/or humiliation.
So from what you write, yes I would venture a guess of yes, you... (read in full...)
How can I avoid my cursed relationship status of FWBs?
Q. Hello Aunts, I'm in a little bit of a dilemma. I have not been in a serious relationship since my last one about 2/3 years ago. It was a breakup that set me over the edge and made me swear off relationships for awhile. So I decided to have ...
A. 25 June 2013: Don't settle for NOT being official and NOT being exclusive. Stop being so vague. Maybe be together in the future... No, if you WANT a BF, then look for a BF, not a maybe, possibly BF, because what you will get if THAT is your mindset is a FWB. He ... (read in full...)
Sister in law won't take care of her kids and my husband and I are expected to
Q. My husband and I are expecting our first child. It seems as if my MIL likes to blame me for her grandkids misfortunes in life.His sister and the kids dad wants to party and MIL wants us to care for the kids. It's putting a strain on our marriage as ...
A. 25 June 2013: You can't MAKE them do anything, but you and your husband can start setting limits to what you want to do. Are you all living together?
... (read in full...)
Do I leave my b/f alone for a night to go out with my friends? No males are invited!
Q. Hi. Currently I’m away at my uni town, and am planning on going home for 2 weeks with my boyfriend who is from my uni town. A group of my best/longest friends from home want to meet up, but they don’t want any boys to be there. One of the girls I’...
A. 25 June 2013: Are you serious?
I don't get why you HAVE to spend all your time with him because you are dating, catching up with friends is OK! and yes, you don't have to bring him along, as in (mean as it may sound) it has nothing to DO with him. It's not like... (read in full...)
Okay for a model girlfriend to kiss another guy model for photo shoot???
Q. My girlfriend does allot of modeling and yesterday she told me that she might be in a photo shoot where she will have to kiss another guy model. I'll be honest and say I am very protective of her and I don't even like the idea of a guy touching her ...
A. 25 June 2013: I can't see how you as a BF can even consider to DICTATE what she can and can not do for work. You do not own her.
IF you can't handle her kissing in a photo-shoot you need to find yourself another GF.... (read in full...)
She broke my heart and she's expecting me to wish her a birthday message
Q. Hi, My ex- girlfriend that broke up our four year relationship would be celebrating her birthday in some days time. The fact is 4 months ago she broke up with me and recently she's been finding different means and tactics to get us talking,...
A. 25 June 2013: I agree with SVC
Block her, delete her, ignore her and move on. ... (read in full...)
How best to end this friendship?
Q. Had a friend, known for 7 years. Freelance work, so understand that occasionally things crop up and she had to cancel arranged lunches, but it got to the point where it was almost constant. Used to spend long emails sorting out her problems ...
A. 25 June 2013: I agree with C. Grant. She doesn't really view you as a friend but as someone who can DO things FOR her when SHE needs/want it.
Personally, I'm not sure she would understand it (or accept) if you told her straight out it isn't working for you, but... (read in full...)
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