He won't let me near his stuff but expects to be allowed to go through mine. Help me!
Q. I am having problems trusting my boyfriend,but he says im crazy my boyfriend used to be very open with his email,his phone,his friends.He would not care if I was on his laptop and his email was open,and would share all his pics with me He wa...
A. 5 August 2013: Good luck, I don't envy your position. It's never fun when a relationship goes from good to bad and you don't notice it till alarm bells start ringing.
I REALLY think you need to talk to him as to WHY he all of a sudden don't trust you. Ask him ... (read in full...)
My married lover's wife knows about us but he still wants to be in contact with me. Why doesn't she just stop him?
Q. I don't know where to begin, I am asking for an opinion, maybe some advice, no cursing or calling me names please. I am already in a lot of pain as it is. I was having a relationship for 6 yrs with a married man. We spoke everyday, saw each other 2 ...
A. 5 August 2013: Stop letting HIM dictate your LIFE.
Yes, people judge you - but trust me they judge him FAR worse. After all HE is the one FUCKING up 2 women lives and you know what? the TWO women just let him.. all in the name of love.
I think you LOVE t... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is asking questions about my past that I don't know how to answer without causing upset!
Q. As per the title my gf likes to try and find out about my past. It sometimes catches up with me, one of her friends is going out with someone who i used to know. Small world. Anyway, my gf has asked me "if i have ever had more than one gf at t...
A. 5 August 2013: Be honest with your GF, sit her down and tell her the truth, not because of a vindictive ex, but because the truth usually have a way of coming out sooner or later.
You can also tell her that you made PLENTY of mistakes in the past and rather n... (read in full...)
Do women really enjoy anal sex?
Q. I had a fairly normal but boing sex life with my now divorced wife. I met a nice woman and have been dating her for 6 months. We had our first sex about 2 months into the relationship. She is quite adventurous sexually, way more than my x wife who ...
A. 5 August 2013:
I HOPE the majority of those who DO have anal enjoy it, otherwise that is just sad.
Personally, it's not for me, but that doesn't mean your GF isn't enjoying herself.... (read in full...)
My married lover's wife knows about us but he still wants to be in contact with me. Why doesn't she just stop him?
Q. I don't know where to begin, I am asking for an opinion, maybe some advice, no cursing or calling me names please. I am already in a lot of pain as it is. I was having a relationship for 6 yrs with a married man. We spoke everyday, saw each other 2 ...
A. 5 August 2013: He told YOU what he KNEW would keep you hanging on to the "hope" that he LOVES you and only you. That YOU two have a future when you don't.
He tells his wife whatever makes her stay.
And honey, I BET the wife can't figure out WHY you are doin... (read in full...)
He won't let me near his stuff but expects to be allowed to go through mine. Help me!
Q. I am having problems trusting my boyfriend,but he says im crazy my boyfriend used to be very open with his email,his phone,his friends.He would not care if I was on his laptop and his email was open,and would share all his pics with me He wa...
A. 5 August 2013: You can both delete stuff so it's pointless to HAVE to swap phones, you should BE ABLE to NOT have to go though your partners phone and STILL trust him/her.
The question is DO YOU think it will make things better if you DO swap? Will it change A... (read in full...)
I do not understand why he has to play me like this.
Q. Hi all, I am in an annoying situation. I met a guy in March. I am 27 and he is 28. When I first met him, he seemed nice and harmless. I chatted with him on fb but he responded very slowly. I was fed up one day and stopped talking to him About one...
A. 4 August 2013: The guy doesn't WANT a GF he wants to be single - YOU want a BF... so you two are not on the same page, stop wasting your time.... (read in full...)
He won't let me near his stuff but expects to be allowed to go through mine. Help me!
Q. I am having problems trusting my boyfriend,but he says im crazy my boyfriend used to be very open with his email,his phone,his friends.He would not care if I was on his laptop and his email was open,and would share all his pics with me He wa...
A. 4 August 2013: THAT is not OK, and you need to tell him in no uncertain terms. ASK him why he thinks it's OK to demand this of you.
And then YOU decide if this is an OK way for him to treat you. It will NEVER stop if you don't either end it or nip it in the bud!... (read in full...)
Was my girlfriend cheating with another guy over Skype?
Q. I've been skeptical of my girlfriend's fidelity to me for a while and have reason to suspect that she may be deceiving me and cheating. Recently, I returned home to visit family and I decided to Skype with her to see how she was doing. When we c...
A. 4 August 2013: Well, now you know, she wasn't a Keeper, she was a OH MY GOODNESS I DODGED A BULLET!
What a cow.
... (read in full...)
I need to get over my insecurities.
Q. Im not sure where to start. I only had one serious girlfriend before my wife. Sure we had sex, but I was only 19, lived with my parents and she lived with hers. Our sexual activities were mostly in the backseat of my truck, with a few nights in a ...
A. 4 August 2013: Holy Moly dude...
LOOK up the Uncle YOS (on DC) and his posts on Retrograde Jealousy, absorb it and then ask yourself this, IS it more important that she is WITH you, or that some sexual things aren't the FIRSTS for her?
THEY are however, the... (read in full...)
At what point is it OK to buy lingerie for your girlfriend?
Q. Me and my gf have been seeing for a year and a half now . I’m thinking I would like to get a special gift. I’m thinking about lingerie. when is it ok to lingerie for your girlfriend? Any advice about getting lingerie for a girlfriend? Is that ...
A. 4 August 2013: I agree with Daisy.. the Lingerie is NOT for her, it's for YOUR enjoyment. So if you WANT her to wear stuff like that for you, ask her what she likes and go shopping together.
My husband LOVES lingerie - me.. not so much. And I really don't li... (read in full...)
He won't let me near his stuff but expects to be allowed to go through mine. Help me!
Q. I am having problems trusting my boyfriend,but he says im crazy my boyfriend used to be very open with his email,his phone,his friends.He would not care if I was on his laptop and his email was open,and would share all his pics with me He wa...
A. 4 August 2013: You are in change of how YOU let him treat you. JUST because he is your BF doesn't mean he has ANY rights to go through your stuff without YOUR permission. Which mean you can tell him, NO.
Something is going on if this is new behavior. And IF y... (read in full...)
Serious HELP! How do I keep a player interested in me?!!!!
Q. Met this guy who is very very wealthy, handsome and well connected yesterday. We swapped numbers and he has texted me asking me out. But he is saying stuff about how he wants me and wants me to go to his house etc. Obv he is a player and takes diff ...
A. 4 August 2013: Don't "hang" out at his house - let him TAKE you out on "real" dates.... (read in full...)
Serious HELP! How do I keep a player interested in me?!!!!
Q. Met this guy who is very very wealthy, handsome and well connected yesterday. We swapped numbers and he has texted me asking me out. But he is saying stuff about how he wants me and wants me to go to his house etc. Obv he is a player and takes diff ...
A. 4 August 2013: Don't "hang" out at his house - let him TAKE you out on "real" dates.... (read in full...)
How can I get to know new people when I can't even tell them what job I do?!
Q. My job is highly confidential so I can not really discuss it with people. Nothing illegal dont worry! But when you meet ppl it is the first thing you get asked! I dont know what to say as I dont like lying. I may say I freelance to which they may ...
A. 4 August 2013: Ask your employer what to say?
I agree with iAmHereToHelpYou, there should be a "layman's term" for your job as well... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is so shy when it comes to sex that I feel like he doesn't want me. How can I get him to open up?
Q. My boyfriend is so shy in areas of sex and foreplay that it makes me feel like he doesn't want me. Whenever I say this to him he gets annoyed and angry with me. He says that he wants me, but he never expresses it and it's very hurtful for me. I've ...
A. 3 August 2013: Maybe back off from sex for a while. Make him basically "work" a bit more for it. That way you KNOW he is ready and most likely more willing to try new things.
Also TALKING about sex is important. That way you can BOTH figure out what each oth... (read in full...)
Any ideas about cooking a romantic meal for my boyfriend, including cooking in the nude?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over two years . I need some help. I’m planning on cooking a romantic meal for my boyfriend Any ideas on what to cook for my boyfriend? Have any of you cooked in the nude? Any ideas about that? I want to...
A. 3 August 2013: I'm 100% with CMMP Cooking nude is .... yea, not at all sexy, not is it smart or sanitary. Think bacon in a frying pan.. yea, not so sexy huh?
You CAN wear something sexy while you cook, but nude? No.. Just no.
Find out what his favorite mea... (read in full...)
My friend wasn't there for me. We've since made up but now I find out he is planning to spend my birthday on the other side of the country. Do I bother with him?
Q. Hey there Cupids So basically an old friend and I have just started talking again after 2 months. To cut a long story short, I was going through some hard stuff and he was not there as a friend. He got in contact with me and wanted us to start ag...
A. 3 August 2013: Seriously?
HE is your friend not your right arm. HE is ALLOWED to have a life of his own that doesn't REVOLVE or INVOLVE you.
If you WANT to celebrate your birthday with HIM find a day where you can BOTH be there.
I think you are being 100%... (read in full...)
I feel like if my ex and I become FWB he might want to get back together with me like he did in the past
Q. I've been dating this guy for over two years. In that time we had broke up and became friends with benefits for about 3 months after which he asked me back out and we dated for over a year and a half. He recently broke up with me, and would want to ...
A. 3 August 2013: I have to be honest and say, if a guy wants FWB, he doesn't WANT YOU - he wants a familiar vagina to park his dick in every now and then.
If you two keep being on and off, it's obviously not really working with you two - so WHY keep trying? ... (read in full...)
What's more wrong? Checking your boyfriend's phone or your boyfriend betraying you?
Q. What is more wrong? Checking on your boyfriends phone or finding out he has betrayed you? Seemingly he said I would never of got hurt and I shouldn't have gone looking...
A. 3 August 2013: I don't think it's that black and white (or as you put it which is more wrong).
You trusted your gut more then you trusted him (and apparently with good reason). If things seems odd in a relationship and you CAN'T talk it out, I kind of get the ... (read in full...)
Should I swallow? I always feel kind of sick afterwards
Q. When my boyfriend comes, I always swallow it. Is that bad for me? Is it unhealthy to ingest and can it make me sick? This only happens once or twice a week. Sometimes my stomach feels upset, but I'm not sure if swallowing is really upsetting my ...
A. 3 August 2013: If you do NOT enjoy swallowing, then don't do it.
I'm guessing you becomes queasy out of more of a psychological reason not because it makes you sick.
I suggest you have a tissue/kitchen-towel handy and spit it into that. Swallowing it do... (read in full...)
Can separation be good for a marriage? I am moving out but we both still want it to work.
Q. I've been asking for a lot of help lately, I certainly need it... I'm going through a separation right now. I'm moving out tomorrow after my marriage has seemed to have fallen apart. I'm devastated. I'm angry. I'm sad. I'm all over the place. ...
A. 3 August 2013: I think it can work if you BOTH want it too (as in you BOTH want to get back together) and IF you both set rules for the separation. As in. no dating other people, how much contact with each other and so forth.
For the most part I thunk if a mar... (read in full...)
Am I just supposed to drop our friendship because her girlfriend doesn't like it?
Q. hey everyone. i'm a 29 year old lesbian and my best friend was a 32 year old lesbian. we had been friends for years. just friends. she was the single most important friend i'd ever had. she got into a relationship about 8 months ago with a woman...
A. 3 August 2013: Why not tell your friend that you will back off and hopefully the friend's GF will see that you respect the relationship and hopefully get over her pettiness.
Your friend HAS to put her child first. Even over you. So if being friends with you enda... (read in full...)
Can you fall in love with someone without having ever talked?
Q. Can you fall in love with someone without ever having talked to them? I am in this date site. But I am not a gold member. So I can't talk to anyone, just when gold member contact me if I like their profile I can answer. I can get over hundreds em...
A. 3 August 2013: 1. YOU are NOT in love with him, you are infatuated by the IDEA of him. And NO do not stalk him on witter,Facebook or whatnot...
RELAX, you sound utterly desperate.
I agree with WiseOwlE - go out and met some men in REALITY - have a few dates... (read in full...)
My ex will not allow his children to see me and I know how much it is hurting them
Q. Hi... Just a question I wanted to ask as I am so so angry and need clarity! I have broke up with my fella of 2 years, he took me for granted, used me as a money bank etc etc. I was unhappy for months and told him but he never tried... He ...
A. 3 August 2013: STOP having contact with him, he is USING his kids to make YOU feel like crap and obviously it's working.
Relationship end and YEAH it sucks, specially for the kids. Make it a clean cut, the kids will get over it and move on a lot faster if you D... (read in full...)
Why didn't he know what he had until it was gone?
Q. Hi Hope someone can give me a bit of advice, as I have totally lost my mind. I have been through so much rubbish recently and I decided enough was enough so ended things. Here is my story and hope others can learn from it to some extent! I me...
A. 2 August 2013: Go no contact. Tell him it's over and you want NOTHING further to do with him. Tell him to stop texting, writing and calling and most of all stop showing up at your door.
Only way YOU can move on is if he fades into the past.
And yes, some... (read in full...)
Could he still be in love with his ex g/f?
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend on, off for almost a year. I have a problem with his ex who he is very best friends with. I looked at messages on his phone and he tries to horny chat with her, he even told her he was just with me to pass the time, ...
A. 2 August 2013: Yes, you HAVE a LOT to worry about.
First off he is telling her that he is JUST with you to pass time? Seriously? Even if that isn't the whole truth perhaps, but WHY would he say that if there wasn't SOME truth in it?
Secondly, he tries to enga... (read in full...)
Fed up with broken promises. How do you break up with someone who's financially dependent?
Q. I've lived with my boyfriend for six years. Our relationship has been rocky for the most part, but I've always felt close to him and considered him a good friend. The main reason I want to break up with him is that he continually makes empty prom...
A. 2 August 2013: Stop worrying about him. It's admirable but it's also 100% holding YOU back and making you WASTE your life on trying to be nice.
Give him 2 weeks to find a place to live, pack up and get out. If he is not out by 2 week YOU pack up his stuff an... (read in full...)
Girls, how long do you want your guys to last in bed?
Q. How long do you want your guys to last in bed, girls? How long have your guys lasted? What's the record? Tell us about it. How long is too long and how short is too short during sex??? ...
A. 2 August 2013: It's really not about how LONG it lasts, it's about how GOOD it is while going.
Now if you want to talk about marathon "sex" look into Tantric sex.
... (read in full...)
He said I should pay our bills because I don't have kids
Q. Hello Aunts and Uncles. My boyfriend is always short of money, I have to pay for our all our travel, the whole rent and he pays 1/2 our food. He says he can't afford any more because of maintenance for his daughter who is 8. I do not know what he ...
A. 2 August 2013: I wouldn't change my answer if the roles were reversed, to be honest.
There are many ways to contribute to a household, traditionally the woman do far more of the household chores and traditionally the male bring home a bigger slice of the baco... (read in full...)
I ended the relationship because she wasn't ready to have sex, now I feel that I was an idiot.
Q. I broke up with my girlfriend about a month ago. The reason for it was that she was a virgin and did not feel ready for sex. At first I did not think this was a problem but after four months I was starting to get frustrated, although I did not show ...
A. 2 August 2013: Perhaps the relationship could have been more, you will never know, so why go around regretting that you ended it?
Instead LEARN from this. If a girl isn't ready and YOU can't wait, you have two choices, wait or end it.
And honestly, a rela... (read in full...)
Boyfriend can't get hard..is it because he is ill?
Q. Alright, so. My boyfriend and I are extremely close and open with each other. And recently we engaged-- or tried to -- in sex. He couldn't get hard enough. Now. I wasn't mad or anything, frustrated, or annoyed. He tried to play with himself,...
A. 1 August 2013: For a guy in your age group - I would say tell him to go see a doctor - it could be psychological or physiological.
Honestly, I have never heard of a young man not being able to get a hard on, even if he was starving.
... (read in full...)
If he really felt the way he says he does then why does he want to do LD another year?
Q. I have been in a LDR for about 9 months. the relationship itself is quite healthy and we have recently had some great talks about what we both want and are looking for and we seem to be on the same page. We talk most days on skype and SMS/call as ...
A. 1 August 2013: Have you two had any face time? As in FACE-TO-FACE or is it all over the Skype/IM you have this relationship? Did you know each other in person before?
I'm asking, because if you two have spend 9 months "dating" over the Internet/Phone only, th... (read in full...)
Went against advice and lost my virginity to a FWB and I loved it. Has anyone else done this and not regretted their actions?
Q. Hi. I have a question concerning my first time. I lost my virginity about a month ago to my fwb. Many people advised me against it seeing as there is no emotional attachment or significance. However i loved it so much. It was such a thrilling and ...
A. 1 August 2013: If you are OK with it, then it's NOT wrong.. FOR YOU.
Each to their own. I DO think in most cases sex quite often involves romantic emotions - specially for women.
In your case maybe it was something you wanted to get out of the way? (The vi... (read in full...)
I have amazing chemistry with this girl but she won't break up with her new boyfriend. Is she just leading me on?
Q. I met a girl on odd string of events. I went out on the porch of my friends house that i now have taken up residence to chill with him while he smoked. Well i looked across the street to the house directly across and saw this cute girl i had noticed ...
A. 1 August 2013: This is what happens when you "chase" after a girl who is already in a relationship - you get burned.
Look for single ladies and you won't have to deal with being used and strung along.
And bro, you are LETTING her lead you on. ... (read in full...)
How do I clear my mind of the man who was with my girl before me?
Q. I'm with a girl who I love, just before me she had a 4month fling with her work colleague, fair enough, but in the last 4 months we've been together she's thrown a few things in my face without thinking (videos of him and her friends messing around, ...
A. 1 August 2013: I agree with both Yos and Cindy - you are being ridiculous. Have you thought about the ketchup in her fridge? HE might have used that! Or the same towels (even if they have been washed)....!
She didn't pour the lube out all over him and then put... (read in full...)
Will I held liable for maintenance ?
Q. Hi please help. Does anyone know, if my husband gets retrenched will I be held liable for the maintenance for his child with his ex girlfriend? Thanks....
A. 1 August 2013: I know in the US you can not be held liable for the child-support of your stepchildren. If you have doubts though, you should contact a barrister.... (read in full...)
I'm happy but overshadowed by jealousy over ex. How do I get past this?
Q. My ex ended our relationship nearly two years ago. We was together 5 years. We were both at fault, but I own up to doing a lot of bad things too. He has ignored me completely and he showed no signs of any grief or jealousy when I met someone else ...
A. 31 July 2013: Stop being petty. YOU moved on (not once but 3 times) with other guys so why can't he? Only you are allowed to be happy?
Let it go, focus on YOUR life - who knows maybe his isn't as happy as you think it is, maybe it is, but you being petty wo... (read in full...)
Am I emotionally cheating by looking at another guy?
Q. Hey everyone, I'm in a relationship with this wonderful guy for 4 months,he loves me,treats me right and takes good care of me! But lately I'v been noticing this other guy who I see around sometimes I found him really cute but I would never approach...
A. 31 July 2013: No, it's not emotionally cheating if all you do is look. Now if you start to stalk him in the Internet and chatting him up, then yes you are heading down "emotional cheating".
JUST because you are dating someone doesn't mean you all of a sudden w... (read in full...)
Every day since I came out there is an argument!
Q. I'm not sure if this is the best place to go but I don't know where to go really. Since I came out 2 years ago things changed completely between my mother and I and its frosty to say the least between us. What happens is that every day there ...
A. 31 July 2013: Sit her down - tell her about your goals. Talk to her. Explain why she isn't helping but rather hurting you. But most of all, no matter what FOCUS on your education, SHOW her you are serious.
Looks like she is "fear based" motivating - She is w... (read in full...)
He said I should pay our bills because I don't have kids
Q. Hello Aunts and Uncles. My boyfriend is always short of money, I have to pay for our all our travel, the whole rent and he pays 1/2 our food. He says he can't afford any more because of maintenance for his daughter who is 8. I do not know what he ...
A. 31 July 2013: Honestly, it sounds like he has it made with you.
Does he do chores? Take care of the house, cook, clean? Anything? At least with him doing chores he is CONTRIBUTING to the household in a way.
If he is not working because he doesn't "feel" l... (read in full...)
What did her text mean? Was it good? Or not so good?
Q. Hello I,m a 52 year old man , and I,ve just been on a first date with a woman. we had lunch, and at the end of the date, I said can I text or call you and she said yes, but a few hours later, before I texted her to thank her ...
A. 31 July 2013: It doesn't sound like she is overly interested, but it could be she is not big on texting and it can also be hard to interpret a text from someone you don't know.
SO, if YOU want to ask her out again, why not do so? She might say yes, she might sa... (read in full...)
Every day since I came out there is an argument!
Q. I'm not sure if this is the best place to go but I don't know where to go really. Since I came out 2 years ago things changed completely between my mother and I and its frosty to say the least between us. What happens is that every day there ...
A. 31 July 2013: Do you think she is harping on you because you came out? Or because she is trying in her very rude way to get you to do your best? It doesn't sound like she is motivating you, but it could be that she is worried that you are focusing more on the ... (read in full...)
Was my girlfriend cheating with another guy over Skype?
Q. I've been skeptical of my girlfriend's fidelity to me for a while and have reason to suspect that she may be deceiving me and cheating. Recently, I returned home to visit family and I decided to Skype with her to see how she was doing. When we c...
A. 29 June 2013: Honestly I think if she was busy with a guy she would make up an excuse and get off Skype.
I think you have a VERY active imagination and you need to learn how to trust. If you think she would cheat the minute you are out the door, then maybe sh... (read in full...)
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