How should I act around the man who rejected me?
Q. I had a crush on a man, who was out of my reach. It was inappropriate. But I told him I had a crush on him and he pretty much rejected me, with no answers after a lot of flirting, when we'd see each other, smiling, waving, winking etc. he didn't h...
A. 24 August 2013: How about your own marriage? Your husband? Did that figure in? Again not judging, just curious.... (read in full...)
We discussed a FWB relationship but now he's running hot and cold!
Q. I have a coworker who's been hot and cold with me for about a year now. The past month, he's come on strong, being very physical and sexual. I would like to have a friends with benefits situation with him. I'm single, and not interested in a ...
A. 23 August 2013: Nope, don't bring it up again. You two WORK together and I think he decided it would be a bad idea.
... (read in full...)
A guy I was messaging online wanted me to do things I wasn't prepared to do and in the end he stopped contacting me. Now I see he's viewed my profile again. What does this mean?
Q. I have been on and off a dating site for about 5 months and have made a few pen pals. In the first few months there was a guy, he is 29 years old and he wanted a friends with benefits situation. In the beginning he was sort of nice complimenting ...
A. 23 August 2013: Why is he viewing your profile?
He is baiting you. Hoping to catch your interest again. Hoping that you are now "desperate" or "curious" enough to "try him out".
Just because he is good looking doesn't mean he is a GOOD guy or a GOOD person to... (read in full...)
How should I act around the man who rejected me?
Q. I had a crush on a man, who was out of my reach. It was inappropriate. But I told him I had a crush on him and he pretty much rejected me, with no answers after a lot of flirting, when we'd see each other, smiling, waving, winking etc. he didn't h...
A. 23 August 2013: What do you do?
You behave like the guy is just another dude. I would say civil. It's kind of hard to be friendly when you made a blunder like that.
Some times we read other people wrong, this... was your time to do that. Don't beat yourself up... (read in full...)
Does anyone have any insight into the communication (or lack of) in this relationship?
Q. I met a man through my brother in law. My father recently died and this man is selling the house I inherited. We started communicating through facebook for a week. Last week , he drove three hours to meet me. We had a pleasant time. The weather was ...
A. 22 August 2013: I would just by start blocking his feeds. If you don't hear from him in a week, then yea, I would un-friend as soon as the house is sold.... (read in full...)
Ex boyfriend has sexual photos/videos of me that I'm afraid he'll use. How do I get him to move on?
Q. I broke up for good with my ex in February. We had a rocky 6 year long relationship. There was a lot of chemistry between us, but there were also trust issues. It all began with him finding out about my past. He reacted so badly that I feared being ...
A. 22 August 2013: Keep the no contact. Telling him you slept with someone else is like lighting gunpowder.
He knows already, he might not admit or accept it, but he knows - you really don't have to bend it in neon for him.... (read in full...)
She doesn't want to be friends but won't block/delete my number. Why?
Q. Question for the group here thanks for any reply: A girl blocked my number previously twice and unblocked it... shes telling me to leave her alone for a few weeks, doesnt want to be friends, yet refuses to delete my number or block it again. W...
A. 22 August 2013: She shouldn't HAVE to block/delete you for you to leave her alone.
I would suggest YOU block/delete HER number, that way you don't have to deal with the drama.... (read in full...)
He broke up with me but keeps changing the reason why!
Q. dear cupid, I have been dating this boy for about two months, I really liked him and I thought he really liked me too. but last night he broke up with me, his original reason was that I was too smart for him and he was too dumb for me. I am prett...
A. 22 August 2013: He can't handle having a GF.. yet. So I suggest you decide if you can be a FRIEND to him or not. Not a ex-gf who still likes him, but an actual FRIEND. If you can't, then be honest and tell him.
I think the whole you are too smart for me was an e... (read in full...)
Does anyone have any insight into the communication (or lack of) in this relationship?
Q. I met a man through my brother in law. My father recently died and this man is selling the house I inherited. We started communicating through facebook for a week. Last week , he drove three hours to meet me. We had a pleasant time. The weather was ...
A. 22 August 2013: I have to agree, IF he was keen on getting to know you better he would put forth a LOT more effort.
I would stop texting him, IF he is interested he will get back to you, if he doesn't well, then you know.... (read in full...)
My ex moved to another town and is trying to befriend my friends. Is he trying to make me jealous and get under my skin?
Q. My ex boyfriend and I broke up three months ago and he moved immediately afterwards to another town where my best friend lives with her boyfriend and all their friends. In three months I have noticed on his facebook that the only people he has added ...
A. 22 August 2013: I would tell your friend about it so they can increase their security on FB - and let them know what he is doing. Now if THEY want to add him, there isn't much you can do. You could hide his feeds and that way you won't know what he is up to.
... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's lie about my birthday present makes me wonder if things can ever work between us?
Q. my bf of almost 2 years lied to me. it was about my birthday present. he said he had ordered something off amazon for me and told me what it was and told me to look out for packages and everything. to make a long story short, i found out he never ...
A. 21 August 2013: Point it OUT to him what you did for him and tell him that THOSE things are IMPORTANT to you.
5 Languages of Love is also a good book to share with him. That way maybe you two can pinpoint the difference in HOW you two express love.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is working abroad and I'm unemployed and struggling with a toddler and another on the way
Q. I'm 23, I have a 3 year old and am currently 23 weeks pregnant. I've been with my boyfriend 5 years and he is abroad finishing a job and will be home in November. Me and my son have just come back home to live with my parents and to look for a house ...
A. 21 August 2013: Have you thought about getting child maintenance?
And call your bank and ASK them how much a wire transfer would cost, then talk to your BF and set him straight. It should cost that much.
That is pretty SHITTY of him to expect you to ta... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's lie about my birthday present makes me wonder if things can ever work between us?
Q. my bf of almost 2 years lied to me. it was about my birthday present. he said he had ordered something off amazon for me and told me what it was and told me to look out for packages and everything. to make a long story short, i found out he never ...
A. 21 August 2013: Gotcha! Thanks for the clear up :)
For his b-day did you do something special/amazing? Maybe he is one of those guys you need to SHOW what you can do.
You said he normally is romantic, so I can see why it doesn't make sense that he can't do... (read in full...)
My roommate says that I smell but I don't know whether she is being mean or honest
Q. My roommate and I hate each other and she says I have an odor problem when I’m doing what I know is right hygiene-wise. I’m at my wits end. We’re in the military. We live in a 3-man room. She says that “my smell” infects the entire room. I h...
A. 21 August 2013: Is SHE the only one complaining about your "smell"? (and I mean to your face, not hearsay from her) If so, I'd say SHE has issues.
Having a "smelly" room mate is not something a Sgt is going to bother with unless a LOT more people had the same com... (read in full...)
Did the fortune tellers mess with my mind or do I truly want to change careers?
Q. Hi guys,you've always given me great advice on love so now I need some career advice. Before I start, I want to say that I have some form of ocd called pure o, where I over analyze thoughts to the point where I have become mentally ill and anxious. ...
A. 21 August 2013: Teaching IS helping. YOU can make a HUGE difference in a (more more then one) child's life by providing then the skills to learn how to think for themselves.
Do I believe in fortune tellers? no. Should you? That I will leave up to you.
If teac... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's lie about my birthday present makes me wonder if things can ever work between us?
Q. my bf of almost 2 years lied to me. it was about my birthday present. he said he had ordered something off amazon for me and told me what it was and told me to look out for packages and everything. to make a long story short, i found out he never ...
A. 21 August 2013: You threatened to break up if HE didn't produce a GREAT b-day present? Or was there more to it then the present?
Because I have know MANY men (and honestly a few women) who SUCK at giving presents.
NOT that being "scared" of not being able t... (read in full...)
Does my wife's behavior mean she is cheating?
Q. In the last year,my wife has talked sexier and much more than in the pastwhile having sex,started to exercise,swallowed several times giving me oral sex a couple times in one week when she. Has only did that twice before in 20yrs and became ...
A. 21 August 2013: Nothing you write raises a red flag for me.
Women's libido can be a come and go in our 40's. So maybe the pocket rocket is because it's not waning but increasing. Her masturbating here and there with it I don't really see a problem with.. UNLESS i... (read in full...)
Is he trying to make me jealous using facebook? Why?
Q. Ok this is really really Weird. This guy I have a major crush on tagged me in a picture on Facebook. The picture was of him, his friend and two girls! None of these people were tagged in the picture,he only said "just having fun right now" and ...
A. 21 August 2013: He is playing games... Kind of like how us girls are told when we are young that if a boy pulls our hair he likes us.
I'd ignore it. Games belong on the playground.
... (read in full...)
Ex initiated contact. I thought I'm over him, but now I can't stick to my guns.
Q. This is my last post. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-do-i-still-feel-sad-miss-him.html So the last time I talked to my ex, he said he will marry me if I fly to him tomorrow. He said he's not over me. I asked why he didn't wish me happy bir...
A. 21 August 2013: He couldn't have MAILED you a card for your birthday? You having blocked him it a LAME ASS excuse. EXCUSE.
So YOU have to fork up the money and FLY up to see him and THEN he will marry you? What is so important about tomorrow? Well I can tell you... (read in full...)
He dated my best friend, should I try again ?
Q. I was dating this guy for a year and a half and we broke up. I couldn't remember the reason why we did because it was a few years ago but I know that it didn't end well. After being broken up for a little bit, my ex started dating my friend...
A. 21 August 2013: Nope, I'd leave it at being friendly towards him.
DUDE, he started to DATE your best friend! She didn't MAKE him date her, he chose to date her.
He was a sucktastic BF and she.. a horrible friend.
Don't go back to him, it will NOT be some... (read in full...)
Ex acts like he wants me back, but says he wants nothing to do with me?
Q. Well, I left my boyfriend because he had a temper. He said some hurtful things and never seemed remorseful to me. After two weeks of no contact, he started talking to me again and things were going pretty good. We decided to organise a second meet ...
A. 21 August 2013: I think those 4 months with NO contact will be GOOD for you. YOU need to hold on to the HOW it made you feel when he had his "temper go off", not look back on the good part, because those are the ones that keep you talking to him.
For some clo... (read in full...)
I gave a guy my phone number but I'm not really interested in him. What should I do?
Q. I went out on Monday night with some friends and their friends (whom I had never met). One of the guys whom I didn't know asked me for my phone number before I left. He knows I don't have a boyfriend. I gave it to him but I'm not interested at al...
A. 21 August 2013: I agree ignoring is rude. YOU gave him the number the least you can do it wither tell him no thanks or meet up and be honest.
And in the future don't give out your number if you don't want someone to call you.
... (read in full...)
I ended up sleeping with my ex only to find out that he has been seeing soomeone new
Q. So.. I slept with my ex bf over the weekend after 2 months being broken up. He was the one that broke no contact, he called me late sat night saying he wanted to talk and bla bla you know the rest. I found out the next day through mutual friends ...
A. 21 August 2013: Booty call from his end of it. YOU thought that IF you went then MAYBE you two could rekindle your relationship, he... thought:" UH let me call my ex and see if I can get laid!"
Stop talking to him. And do not go see him either. CUT the contact.... (read in full...)
Anyone else ever not been invited to a baby shower? I'm engaged to her father.
Q. I've been in my current relationship for 5 years and we are engaged. I know his children, etc. The daughter is married (27 years old) and is now pregnant for the first time. She is having her baby shower in a couple of months. I only found this ...
A. 21 August 2013: I would just talk to your fiance and seen if you two should make her a NICE baby basket and send it from you and her Dad.
Not being invited might be because SHE (the daughter) isn't the one throwing it, most likely the MOTHER (ex-wife) is and that... (read in full...)
Ex husband and ex wife still doing drama? Divorced or NOT!!
Q. My potential mate has an ex wife. After 5 and a half years, they divorced. They have a 5 year old daughter. He likes me and he wants me to be his girlfriend but I have a few issues with his ex wife. While she was married to him, sought attention...
A. 20 August 2013: I'm not "taking her side" I'm just looking at if from how you write it. YOU write ALL about her faults and her almost "stalker" behavior - when SHE shouldn't be your MAIN focus. HE should be.
HE cheated on her MULTIPLE times - but in your opinion ... (read in full...)
I'm married, he's married. Do I tell him that I have a crush?
Q. I am married and I have a crush on a married teacher I met only briefly. Should I tell him? ...
A. 20 August 2013: If you want to sound like a 13 year old girl, then go ahead, declare your crush...
I mean really.. what would the POINT of telling him be?
... (read in full...)
Should I buy my boyfriend a few toiletries that he can keep at my place or is it overbearing?
Q. I'm 31 and have been dating my guy for 6 weeks. Over the past few weeks we've gotten pretty close and he's been spending 1-2 weeknights and all weekend at my apartment. He has a toothbrush at my apartment, but no other practical stuff ...
A. 20 August 2013: I agree, you are NOT his mother. If he wants to keep stuff at your house.. He can bring some. You are not dating a child, right?
Way way overbearing and you know it will lead to being taken for granted in no time or being taken as the "overly ... (read in full...)
Is being tan really considered to be more beautiful?
Q. So lately, everyone has been commenting on how pale I am. I mean its the summer time and I work as a lifeguard so you'd think I'd be super tan but nope, I have to wear a lot of sunscreen and when I don't, I get badly burned very easily and the burn ...
A. 20 August 2013: I have two versions.. lobster or pale. I do NOT tan well at all.
I'm from Scandinavian/Scottish stock with fair hair, eyes and skin and apparently we do not really tan. Skin cancer also run in my family, so I'm pretty careful with my skin AND my k... (read in full...)
Ex husband and ex wife still doing drama? Divorced or NOT!!
Q. My potential mate has an ex wife. After 5 and a half years, they divorced. They have a 5 year old daughter. He likes me and he wants me to be his girlfriend but I have a few issues with his ex wife. While she was married to him, sought attention...
A. 20 August 2013: You seem almost obsessed with his wife, to be honest.
She can't MAKE him wear her bracelets unless HE wants to. He is an adult and I'm sure he is capable of saying no, even to his ex-wife. So either he is trying to "help" her launch her company ... (read in full...)
Why do conversations with my friend always wind up being steered towards sex?
Q. I really don't know what's going on with my friend. We're pretty close and I guess he's kind of like a brother to me. He might not see it that way, but I see it. I met him almost a year ago. We've exchanged crushes and personal secrets, and the...
A. 20 August 2013: I have to agree with Doug.
He doesn't HAVE to talk sex with you.
I get it that hormones are raging and YOU are someone he feels comfortable talking sex with (without judging him as a perv) and I DO think he hopes you want to have sex with hi... (read in full...)
This man just really nice, or a big creep?
Q. So people of DearCupid, please help! Is this guy grnuinely nice, or just creepy?! I work at Walmart. My manager is just a year older than me. When I met him 2 1/2 months ago, all we did was jokingly insulteach other. "ugly", "scrawny", etc, jus...
A. 20 August 2013: Turn to your doctor. Get tested and do NOT have sex with him. Having sex just once and she being HIV+ doesn't means he automatically has it (or that he has passed it n to you) BUT if you are NOT being careful (and obviously he isn't) you are playing ... (read in full...)
Am I being too polite with the ladies?
Q. Just a quick question. In this day is it better to be more cheeky with the ladys then too polite? I mean I'm oddly old fashioned, and not a major touchy person with girls.. even ones I like.. heck if I meet them I. Might give them a peck on t...
A. 20 August 2013: I think a guy with manners is sexy as heck. BUT there is the line of being so polite that a girl thinks you are either NOT interested, want to be "friends" or (no offense) reserved.
Positions your chest and shoulders toward the girl you are inte... (read in full...)
What's the difference between pushing for a date and glorified stalking?
Q. I'm not the best with women. I'm OK but not great. One thing I just can't seem to do is be persistent in pursuing a girl I really like because I don't want to be seen as a glorified stalker. If I ask a girl out and she says no, I leave it at that ...
A. 20 August 2013: Personally, I never told a guy I was interested in seeing again, no. If I was interested I would have given him my number and that way leaving the ball in his court.
If I DID get hit on by a guy I wasn't interested in I would say no, right aw... (read in full...)
I can rarely make my girfriend orgasm, she can do it by herself but doesn't let me share in the experience and it makes me feel hurt, rejected and excluded
Q. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 years. I am feeling pretty low in the relationship because of an issue which has been bothering me for nearly a year. I can only make her cum at most about 1x a month and we have an active sex life. She ma...
A. 20 August 2013: I thought you decided to end it with her because she wouldn't "share" her masturbation with you?
I don't think you really understand female sexual enjoyment - I know it's not what you want to hear, but it doesn't revolve around your ego or your ... (read in full...)
My husband wants a sex change and I am feeling like it is the death of our marriage. How can I cope and help him?
Q. I'm at a loss and in desperate need of advice. So bare with me for a minute because this is gonna be a bit long... I am married to my husband of almost 3 years. Well the other day he came out to his family and friends about him being bisexual...
A. 20 August 2013: Have you talked to him about his expectations AFTER the surgery? What does he expect from you? From the marriage? The relationship?
Does it match up what YOU want?
If he always felt like a woman, is he then bi-sexual? Or into men? Or into wom... (read in full...)
This man just really nice, or a big creep?
Q. So people of DearCupid, please help! Is this guy grnuinely nice, or just creepy?! I work at Walmart. My manager is just a year older than me. When I met him 2 1/2 months ago, all we did was jokingly insulteach other. "ugly", "scrawny", etc, jus...
A. 20 August 2013: Get tested in 3 months, 6 months and again in 18 months. And for crying out loud have nothing to do with him!
... (read in full...)
Five years together and his soulmate, yet his actions bother me
Q. Hi. My bf and I have been together for almost 5 years. Because of work we have lived 2 hours away for the past year. He has said he wants to marry me and I am his soulmate. When his dad died a couple of weeks ago, he told me they were not having a ...
A. 20 August 2013: What I don't get is why you didn't ask him where and when you needed to show up.
Instead of waiting for him to "invite" you.
I would bring it up for sure, it makes no sense.... (read in full...)
Is it possible for guys to wishfully hope I fancy them?
Q. is it possible for guys to wishfully hope i fancy them?... i wonder because a lot of guys i met always fall under the impression that i fancy them for one reason or an other, i am not touchy feely i am actually quiet reserved, when it comes to perso...
A. 19 August 2013: If these are people you HAVE to work with I would try and keep it professional and not personal at all. See if that changes anything.
And even if they DO think you have the hots for them (and you really don't) that is THEIR problem isn't it?
... (read in full...)
My husband wants a sex change and I am feeling like it is the death of our marriage. How can I cope and help him?
Q. I'm at a loss and in desperate need of advice. So bare with me for a minute because this is gonna be a bit long... I am married to my husband of almost 3 years. Well the other day he came out to his family and friends about him being bisexual...
A. 19 August 2013: Can I ask why, when you were first dating and you found out he wanted a sex change you still went ahead and married him? Not that I'm saying you shouldn't have married him knowing it, but it's always harder when reality sets in and he actually wants ... (read in full...)
I'm on a new dating site but I already have doubts about it!
Q. I just went on a dating site that has rich,successful, male models. I paid for a month just to try it out and the only way you can reach the staff is through email, they don't have a phone number which I thought was odd. Well anyway, I started ...
A. 19 August 2013: I'm trying to figure out why you would sign up for such a site first of all. It's not that the men are out of your league ( I don't believe in "leagues") but it seems like you would have very little in common with "those" kind of men.
I would lo... (read in full...)
Is it possible for guys to wishfully hope I fancy them?
Q. is it possible for guys to wishfully hope i fancy them?... i wonder because a lot of guys i met always fall under the impression that i fancy them for one reason or an other, i am not touchy feely i am actually quiet reserved, when it comes to perso...
A. 19 August 2013: Have you asked any of your female friends?
And honestly if a guy starts to act like a douche because he think you like him, I'd stop talking to him in a NY minute.
Does this happen often? If so I'd dial back the joking a bit and see how it g... (read in full...)
One of them is lying. Who do I believe?
Q. i m 18 girl from india. i met a guy when i was in 12 th grade . we are together for 1 year and 3 months . we have all ups and downs as normal couple now the problem is he had created a new fb acc . he dnt share his password. he shared photos...
A. 19 August 2013: So you KNOW he lied about talking to her, is it so far fetched that he lied about the kissing and proposing? The fact that he felt he needed to create a whole new FB to keep it a secret from YOU says a lot.
I'd walk away from this guy.... (read in full...)
This man just really nice, or a big creep?
Q. So people of DearCupid, please help! Is this guy grnuinely nice, or just creepy?! I work at Walmart. My manager is just a year older than me. When I met him 2 1/2 months ago, all we did was jokingly insulteach other. "ugly", "scrawny", etc, jus...
A. 13 August 2013: After your update I have to say mega creep too. Just tell him NO. Stop texting, hanging out. If he isn't transferring I would be looking to get one.
... (read in full...)
This man just really nice, or a big creep?
Q. So people of DearCupid, please help! Is this guy grnuinely nice, or just creepy?! I work at Walmart. My manager is just a year older than me. When I met him 2 1/2 months ago, all we did was jokingly insulteach other. "ugly", "scrawny", etc, jus...
A. 13 August 2013: Does he know that Walmart use cameras 24/7? So he really NEEDS to cut out the PDA.
IS he creepy? For the most part (from what you write I would say no, he is infatuated) but looking up your address and popping out of nowhere.. little creepy. ... (read in full...)
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