I saw a condom behind my boyfriend's sofa, should I be worried ?
Q. I saw a condom behind my boyfriend's sofa, should i be worried ? The condom wasn't used, as his semen wasn't in it. It wasn't there when I went to his house before that. He told me that he had found it down the side of his other sofa, and he h...
A. 14 July 2014: Well, I kinda believe the playing around with condoms drunk... I know my first BF and I had a fun night going through a box trying to make balloon animals.. however, drunk or not (we were) we cleaned up after us.... (read in full...)
Do girls REALLY fondle each other to attract male attention?
Q. There is this guy at work, who I will call "John". John is a real chick magnet. Every girl, whether workmate or customer, is attracted to him. E.g. while I am talking to a female customer, she snatches looks at John, and many times smiles to him. ...
A. 13 July 2014: Some girls do, I'm sure. NOT all.
I'd say "attention.. ummm.. seeker" are the ones who primarily do that. It's kinda pathetic.
... (read in full...)
I saw a condom behind my boyfriend's sofa, should I be worried ?
Q. I saw a condom behind my boyfriend's sofa, should i be worried ? The condom wasn't used, as his semen wasn't in it. It wasn't there when I went to his house before that. He told me that he had found it down the side of his other sofa, and he h...
A. 13 July 2014: First off, EWW if someone find a condom in their couch WHY toss it BEHIND some furniture and not out in the trash? That's gross.
Secondly, if he DOES let friends use his place that could be a reasonable explanation.
If it was open AND unused ... (read in full...)
I don't get wet before sex and I don't know if I've had an orgasm
Q. I'm 24 and I've been with a few different guys. The other day my boyfriend asked me if I've ever had a orgasim with him and I honestly couldn't answer. I've had times during sex with him where my legs will shake and it feels downright amazing but ...
A. 13 July 2014: Auntie Cindy brings up some good points.
GO see your doctor/Gyno and get checked. Do NOT douche with all the scented crap you see in the store. It can be that your PH balance is totally out of whack because of over douching/perfume where it doesn... (read in full...)
I don't want him back but I know I have to arrange for him to be able to see our baby!
Q. I really need some advice on how best to deal with my boyfriend cheating on me and setting up some form of contact for our baby while I allow myself time to take it all in. My boyfriend of three years had cheated on me while I was pregnant, it was...
A. 12 July 2014: I agree fully with Cerberus.
This IS the time to let your family HELP you.
Also I would make the visitation schedule a legal arrangement and also make sure you file for Child Maintenance.
... (read in full...)
I get the silent treatment every time we have an argument!
Q. I have been in a long distance relationship with a very passive aggressive man. We've been together for 2 years. We had a small argument 2 weeks ago, and i did apologize to him the next day telling him that i'm going through a lot of stress l...
A. 12 July 2014: I have to agree with Janniepeg. YOU should take the 12 days of "silent treatment" as him breaking up with you and YOU should cut the contact too.
He ISN'T being a good BF, not even a decent one. My guess is you ALWAYS apologize even when the faul... (read in full...)
Boyfriend of one month lives with me and I pay the bills, ex boyfriend says he cant be with me but wants me to wait for him.
Q. So this is kind a long story that will lead to the question. Please give me some advise though. I am currently dating someone and have been for a month. Now my ex, who was made at the fact I was dating his friend or anyone for that matter, sai...
A. 12 July 2014: I agree fully with Auntie Bim.
DUMP the current BF - he was a rebound for you, no more. BUT he is ALSO a moocher. Seriously? He lives there and do nothing? Pays nothing? and on top of that doesn't make any efforts to please you? Yea, he is like ... (read in full...)
I think my husband might be bi and I don't know what to do
Q. I am very confused and at a loss of what to do, think and believe . My husband and I have been together 3yrs and got married last november. I just found out the truth that my husband has been talking/flirting with other girls before and after we got ...
A. 11 July 2014: I think he doesn't want to talk about it because he isn't sure himself.
Fascination with something (like tranny porn) doesn't ALWAYS mean that they WANT to try it. It's just really different from most things they know (sexually).
And I think (... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is physically abusive. Part of me wants to leave him but I also know he would never truly hurt me
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for two and a half years, and we recently moved in together. He is usually extremely sweet and caring. But sometime he has bouts of anger that make me extremely uncomfortable. I can honestly say he'd never hit me, bu...
A. 11 July 2014: Sorry you do NOt know that he will never hurt you, all you know is... that he HASN'T hurt you SEVERELY yet.
What you don't seem to grasp is that HE doesn't SEE that HIS actions are wrong, HE makes YOU take the full blame. He claims to JUSt be ... (read in full...)
Should I tell her he is no good?
Q. Hi everyone! Basically, I was dating a guy around 9 months ago whilst me and my then ex boyfriend, now boyfriend were figuring things out. We have now been together 5 years and after a family members death we hit a rough patch! Anyway, I met t...
A. 11 July 2014: I understand why you want to tell her, but.. this would be a case of he said, she said.
He sounds like an utter loser. And a sore "loser" too. He wanted you but when you after one date didn't want him, he wanted you more (or maybe all he really w... (read in full...)
I am adopting a mixed race child, how do I style and manage afro hair? I don't want the agency to think I'm unfit.
Q. Hello all I have no family or friends to turn to about this, so I was hoping some of you might be able to help me. I'm a white woman from an entirely white family. I've been through the adoption process and had said that I didn't mind what skin c...
A. 11 July 2014: SVC is correct. Afro is not a type of hair, it's a STYLE of hair.
I would wait till you met the baby and then consider looking for a good hairdresser who is black. And I don't say that to sound silly, but I have found that in the US, MOST black ha... (read in full...)
I think my husband might be bi and I don't know what to do
Q. I am very confused and at a loss of what to do, think and believe . My husband and I have been together 3yrs and got married last november. I just found out the truth that my husband has been talking/flirting with other girls before and after we got ...
A. 11 July 2014: Does it really MATTER whether he is bi or straight?
Being bi-sexual doesn't mean he will automatically want to cheat on you with a man, she-male, tranny or another woman.
The fact that he TALKS to others in a sexual nature has NOTHING to do wi... (read in full...)
This girl is too intense.. how can I tell her to back off without being rude?
Q. So I have a work acquaintance in another department across the hall from me. We started hanging out in a group a few months ago and things seemed pretty cool. She is fairly new in town and I figured she just wanted new people to hang out with. L...
A. 11 July 2014: This is one of those instances where you might just have to be honest with her.
TRY and put yourself in her shoes for a minute or two. She is new in town and hoping to make friends. My guess is she doesn't make lasting friends easily.
Maybe t... (read in full...)
How to tell your partner you have HIV?
Q. I recently found I that I am hiv positive. I've only had 3 sex partners. Last year I was dating 2 guys and I was tested last year after sex with them and I was negative. I've been single and haven't been sexually active. I recently started talking ...
A. 11 July 2014: I'm sorry about your diagnosis. The MOST important thing you can do is be PROACTIVE about your health and TAKE your meds.
Second most important is to inform partners. HE IS the most likely candidate, but it can take a while to show up on tests (t... (read in full...)
How does one avoid date-rape and why DON'T some dates/boyfriends accept "no" for an answer?
Q. **Please mods, I think I ask a lot of important questions here and while I do mention date-rape, I put it in the cleanest way possible. Is there a way to share my experience and questions without it getting deleted? ** There are a lot of posts l...
A. 11 July 2014: UNTIL we (society & parents) stop teaching boys to "go out and have fun" and girls to "stay safe" there is NO foolproof way of preventing rape or date-rape.
UNTIL girls are taught that it is OK to WALK away from a bad situation (let's say you are ... (read in full...)
Ex Blocked me on Facebook, but won't tell me why?
Q. OK, brief story…at 30 years old, I met my first real love. He moves around a lot for his job, so he admitted to me that he had never been “in love” before either. He had, had his heart broken at a young age, and always shied away from real ...
A. 11 July 2014: I agree with Auntie Cindy (again) He likes to toy with you. He KNOWS that he he whistles you come running. It IS about control and manipulation. He knows which buttons to push and when he is bored, he pushes yours.
Come on. Mr. Big was a douchewa... (read in full...)
Am I being toyed with or is this something I should hold out for?
Q. This is probably an obvious answer but I still feel confused about the situation. A little over a year ago I was chatting with a girl on an online dating site. She seemed very lovely, is a psychologist, pretty, nice, funny. We messaged back an...
A. 11 July 2014: I have to agree with Auntie Cindy (as per usual)
I wouldn't call you an idiot either, but.. you need to wake up and smell the coffee.. She IS stringing you along just in case her BF ditches her or wants another "break". And who she is and the fant... (read in full...)
Chatting online for a month and he wants me to pay his phone bill so we can talk
Q. I met this guy in a dating website about a month ago and he asked me to pay his phone bill. It makes me a little uncomfortable because I don't know if he is using me. He says he likes me a lot and has plans to come visit me in 3 weeks (lives 7 hours ...
A. 11 July 2014: Nope, don't pay. Instead cut the contact. If he can't afford a SIMPLE phone bill of $60 he can't afford to met up with you any time in the future and (at least financially) has nothing to offer.
He has "plans" to visit you, 7 hours away, but can'... (read in full...)
Is it time to call quits on my relationship?
Q. Is it time to call quits on my relationship? I've been with my boyfriend for close to five years. We've had some amazing times together but the cons have been building up to boiling point lately. I've never liked how disrespectfully he speak...
A. 11 July 2014: I think it's a valid point. If he treats his family with disrespect it CAN be just a matter of time before he will do the same to you.
He obviously isn't going to change that fact about himself, he apologize because it's placate you into thinking... (read in full...)
Should I shave my beard for my friend's wedding?
Q. I have my friend's wedding to go to in a couple of weeks and I am debating whether or not to shave.. I have had a beard for the last 10 months and have grown fond of it, it is part of me now I feel. I do keep it 'trimmed' but it is still probably...
A. 11 July 2014: I think that is REALLY nice of you to ask the bride. And yes, it will grow back :)
Enjoy the wedding.
Your friend picked a very thoughtful Best Man.... (read in full...)
Should I shave my beard for my friend's wedding?
Q. I have my friend's wedding to go to in a couple of weeks and I am debating whether or not to shave.. I have had a beard for the last 10 months and have grown fond of it, it is part of me now I feel. I do keep it 'trimmed' but it is still probably...
A. 10 July 2014: I agree that if you are IN the wedding (as a groomsman or best man) you CAN ASK the groom/bride (the beard will grow back) or just trim it and go as you are.
I put CAN ASK - because I don't think you HAVE to ask. Now if they have mentione... (read in full...)
I was afraid for my life but now I'm known as a snitch
Q. So am I a snitch? I've now got the reputation of a snitch and people say I acted like a "white girl". This was a break and we were in the classroom, with no teacher. My friend and this girl were having a verbal fight about throwing paper at ...
A. 10 July 2014: Nope, you are not a snitch.
Don't buy into whatever crap this bully wants to FEED you. Just STOP talking to her or about her.
If she was trying to beat someone up, even if it's not you - I don't consider it snitching. Bullies like her needs t... (read in full...)
His lack of response and removal of profile probably suggests no desire on his part. Should I still contact him on facebook?
Q. So, I found this cute guy on okcupid. I messaged him, he messaged back, with clear enthusiasm. We wrote back and forth for three weeks, sometimes essay-grade responses, from his part and mine. I am on vacation abroad, due back in October. He knew ...
A. 9 July 2014: Nope, don't contact him on FB. Not sure why he stopped wanting to talk, but I would respect it and look elsewhere for a new penpal/friends/ potential date.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got another girl pregnant
Q. i would like to ask about my boyfriend of six years. he got another girl pregnant. i saw them dating through the pictures in facebook. i ask my boyfriend first but he refuse to answer. thats why i directly ask the girl. she said that my boyfriend is ...
A. 7 July 2014: I would let him go. Let him be with this pregnant chick. He will tell you whatever he THINKS you want to hear.
Personally, I don't see what there is to fix. HE screwed up BIG time. HE cheated on you. HE got another woman pregnant and MADE her... (read in full...)
Lost my best friend because of her "cousin"
Q. Ok so my bestfriend of almost 3 years ... Just all of a sudden cut me off. Her pretend cousin is like the BOSS of her . She runs her and tells her what to do so I think she played a HUGE part in it ! School starts in august an I just don't want to ...
A. 7 July 2014: Just smile and wave, like a boss.
You do NOT have to be friend with either of them again. When school starts up MAKE new friends. And enjoy the senior year with people you WANT to be around.... (read in full...)
Does not wanting to to work outside the home make me a bad person?
Q. Does not wanting to to work outside the home make me a bad person? My husband barely makes enough to support us. We don't even have children. We have talked about adoption in the future when we are better off. We're in our mid twenties. I ofte...
A. 7 July 2014: The biggest regret I have was to NOT be financially independent after marriage. It was really much of a choice to stay home, but having lived in 2 places where the kind of job I skilled at and could pull a good wage was impossible to get, and day ... (read in full...)
I was to experiement sexually with my friend
Q. i have been thinking about it for a longtime and i really want to experiment with my close friend. i would like to get him to experiment with him but 1] when i hit on him he dont take it seriosly. 2] if we do what if he tells somebody. so how do i ...
A. 7 July 2014: I think the fact that HE isn't reacting means he isn't INTERESTED. It would be MUCh easier for him to roll over ot stop pretending to be asleep.
MAYBE you are gay/bi-sexual and want to experiment (nothing wrong with that) BUT IF you want to do th... (read in full...)
Is it unreasonable to not want my baby exposed to an unhygenic environment?
Q. Hello everyone I am having a problem with my parents and i'm wondering if i'm being reasonable. I'm 19 and i'm almost 36 weeks pregnant me and my fiance live with my parents we have our room and our nursery. My parents have always told me they never ...
A. 7 July 2014: No, I don't think you are wrong, but I DO think you need to consider finding a place of your own before you baby gets mobile. Once they start to crawl/walk/roll they get into EVERYthing.
And while it might be nice to have build-in baby sitters ... (read in full...)
Why did my friend say one thing and do another? I'm so hurt
Q. Why did my friend do this? am I overreacting? So a couple from our church was getting married and my friend told me about it and I was really looking forward to it and she's close to the couple so she said she'd let me know when the wedding ...
A. 6 July 2014: I know many places you can show up for the church ceremony to ANYONE's wedding, but you obviously do not know the bride or groom that well, so I'm not sure why you are so mad.
If they were GOOD friends or even good acquaintances they would ha... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is as unromantic as can be
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for a little over a year. We connect so well in everything. He challenges me intellectually, is fun, sweet, affectionate. The thing is, he is as unromantic as a person can be. As an example, he lives right across t...
A. 6 July 2014: Men can't read minds nor do the majority GET the little hints some women toss out there.
This is WHO he is. GRanted most men can be "trained" a little if they are oblivious to what a GF wants, but you are going to have to spell it out. YOU are ... (read in full...)
My grandmother is a gossip and I don't want to see her. How do I handle this?
Q. My grandmother and mother are both negative gossips. I am 32 years old and for the past 4 years have put some distance between them and myself. However, now that I have returned to the city that I grew up in and they live in my grandmother is ...
A. 6 July 2014: I'm sorry, seems like your family are lacking so common decency. If I had a family member crating drama at a place I was showing my art I would be furious.
However, YOU know what your family is like.
I'd also give her one more chance,but I wou... (read in full...)
She might be interested, how do I proceed when I am in the middle of cleaning up?
Q. I volunteer at the humane Society for an hour or two. Cleaning up dog crap on the outside walking path. While I do this, I listen to my arm band radio and I start getting into the music and start singing. This woman heard me and kept smiling at me. ...
A. 6 July 2014: Just smile back and see how she react. If she doesn't turn and walk away saying hi might work too.
Picking up poo is not such a big deal really, I was walking my BIL's dog at the dog beach the other day and right after we got out of the car the ... (read in full...)
What is the proper etiquette after a break up for letting people know?
Q. I need some post break up advice. I have recently broken up with my long term girlfriend an it is completely final. Because we've been together a long time, we have a lot of shared friends. When we first broke up, we didn't tell many people apart ...
A. 6 July 2014: I don't think there is a post-break up etiquette that you HAVE to follow.
I would just tell whomever as they ask about it. Sooner or later they will all know. If they ask if there is any hope, just let them know that it was mutual and no, neither ... (read in full...)
Do some people go to extremes to break up with someone?
Q. My boyfriend has decided to end our relationship and we have agreed to be friends he told me he's not been well and had been to the hospital he won't tell me what's going on just its best for me to find someone else he said it was not good news and ...
A. 6 July 2014: Yes, having a child together makes a big difference in the advice.
I would without ask him if this is a hereditary illness and if he has even considered his child in all this. ... (read in full...)
I lost respect for him when he told me about his experience with hookers
Q. Today I have found out something about my boyfriend's past that has really bothered me. We've been dating only around 5 months now but it's getting to the point where it's pretty serious and we're actually going on holiday together for a week in a ...
A. 5 July 2014: If he left like he wasn't "clean" after that 3-some then he was bragging earlier with this "amazing experience" - it was said so he wouldn't sound like this was a regret.
As for showering after sex, some people do ( I am one of those - I don't "b... (read in full...)
Do some people go to extremes to break up with someone?
Q. My boyfriend has decided to end our relationship and we have agreed to be friends he told me he's not been well and had been to the hospital he won't tell me what's going on just its best for me to find someone else he said it was not good news and ...
A. 5 July 2014: He has dumped you due to some "mysterious sickness" and you feel he OWES you the diagnosis?
What would it matter? Let's say he had cancer and was given 6 months to live, maybe he goes to the pub to enjoy the last bit of time he has with friends.... (read in full...)
I lost respect for him when he told me about his experience with hookers
Q. Today I have found out something about my boyfriend's past that has really bothered me. We've been dating only around 5 months now but it's getting to the point where it's pretty serious and we're actually going on holiday together for a week in a ...
A. 5 July 2014: Well, if he went out about town with two elder brothers I can see the scenario where they either paid to "get him laid" or used some brotherly peer pressure to do so, or.. simply encouraged him. Though it does seem a little nasty to do on a family ... (read in full...)
Now I've got him why aren't I satisfied?
Q. I've been having an affair with a married man for almost over 18 months now, he's been wed for about 6 weeks, has a 2-year-old son, and on Wednesday he announced he's leaving his wife for me. He said he'd told his wife "I'm leaving you, got a new ...
A. 5 July 2014: I think he should have got himself a place of his own, not gone from the wife to you. But then again, if he did that he would REALLY have to take care of himself. Now he doesn't have to, you will do it.
Since you had no quarms screwing a married ... (read in full...)
He is 13 and never met his father, who now has a brain tumour
Q. I am a single mum of 1 son whos never had a dad in his life hes had male figures like my dad and brothers , ive just found out the father of my child has a brain tumour, we split before our child was born and he hasn't seen our son ive read up on ...
A. 5 July 2014: Why not try and contact the father of your son? Just don't tell your son til you know for sure and if he refuses then you will have to go from there.
... (read in full...)
How do I handle his porn addiction?
Q. This is another question about porn, but okay, here goes.. I'm 32, my husband is 34, been married since 2011, over the past few weeks he's been refusing sex. And it's all down to pornography. The "smoking gun" as it were, was a sign-up for a po...
A. 5 July 2014: Does HE see it as an addiction? Does HE want to do anything about it? Have you two talked about it (without any accusations).
You can't FIX this for him. HE will have to accept that he has it and be WILLING to change it, get help and work hard on ... (read in full...)
I betrayed his trust by lying
Q. I am 32 and my boyfriend is 38. I love and adore him, and am certain that I want to build a future with him. I know he feels the same way. The problem is that I've betrayed his trust by lying to him a few months ago, and once again recently. The ...
A. 5 July 2014: Everyone have their limits to what they will tolerate on a partner. My guess is your BF had enough, he might have felt that it was more of a pattern then a couple of ooops.
Personally, I can see both sides. I can see talking to an ex, but I don't ... (read in full...)
My ex that abused me is moving and its freaking me out because I don't know where he's moving to
Q. Am I over reacting? I don't want to go to much into things but my ex partner abused me. We've been separated a few years now. He still contacts me from time to time. Anyway he contacted me to tell me he's selling up and moving. I thought...
A. 4 July 2014: Have you ever ASKED him how he got your number? Because either someone in your circle GIVES him your number or you need to have an unregistered phone number.
I understand that it worries you, I would be too.
I suggest you take extra preca... (read in full...)
I lost respect for him when he told me about his experience with hookers
Q. Today I have found out something about my boyfriend's past that has really bothered me. We've been dating only around 5 months now but it's getting to the point where it's pretty serious and we're actually going on holiday together for a week in a ...
A. 4 July 2014: He was 18, male with a pulse and in Thailand... While I agree with the attitude towards prostitution and exploration of kids and women especially when it comes to the "sex industry" you have to remember a couple of things.
1. He is NOT you. If ... (read in full...)
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