How come men get away with playing reverse psychology with women when they are dead wrong?
Q. How come men get away with playing reverse psychology with women when they are dead wrong? I snooped and found something that i really wanted answers to. If its true i will have trust issues with my husband. Well, i tried to control myself but he s...
A. 28 July 2015: What can you do?
Not much, honestly. It's like the whole you can drag a horse to water but you can't make it drink (unless it's thirsty).
He isn't "thirsty" about sharing the details with you. If it's something from his past (before he knew ... (read in full...)
How come men get away with playing reverse psychology with women when they are dead wrong?
Q. How come men get away with playing reverse psychology with women when they are dead wrong? I snooped and found something that i really wanted answers to. If its true i will have trust issues with my husband. Well, i tried to control myself but he s...
A. 28 July 2015: That is backwards, it sounds more like a guy wanting more time to come up with a GREAT excuse rather than tell you the truth. (to be honest).
Since the bee is out of the beehive - I'd just ask him to explain what's up - no need for the sister t... (read in full...)
Three years together and my Gf has asked me to pay ($5000) towards a medical procedure she wants. What would you do if in my situation?
Q. I'm in a serious relationship with my girlfriend for the past 3 years. She's always been independent and has never asked me for anything. For the past couple of months however she has been thinking of getting a surgery that insurance won't help wit...
A. 27 July 2015: That would depend entirely of what she "needs" done, but ... for the most part I'd say no. If you can't AFFORD to "just" give her $5,000 - then I think saying no, I can't afford it would be OK.
I honestly think she should ask her parents BEFORE y... (read in full...)
How come men get away with playing reverse psychology with women when they are dead wrong?
Q. How come men get away with playing reverse psychology with women when they are dead wrong? I snooped and found something that i really wanted answers to. If its true i will have trust issues with my husband. Well, i tried to control myself but he s...
A. 27 July 2015: You asked the blanket question because you didn't want him to KNOW that you snooped.
Because ASKING a "blanket question" shows trust issues or you wouldn't have asked. And your husband isn't dumb. He knows something is up.
SO whether he WANTS... (read in full...)
Snooping and led to Betrayal by my husband and alledgedly double life
Q. My life suddenly just collapsed in front of me. I just found out the man i married 5mths ago has another family in the UK. What should i do. I feel like dying. I met my husband through a mutual friend last yr. He told me about his baby mama who he c...
A. 27 July 2015: Why haven't you asked him these questions? Why not confront him with what you know?
He is REALLY the only one who CAN tell you. Whether he will tell you the truth or another lie, THAT I can't tell you.... (read in full...)
We have a 6month old baby together. How can I tell him I don't think I love him now, without hurting him?
Q. I am currently engaged and have a six month baby with my partner but I don't think I am in love with him anymore. I love him like a brother, we are buying a house together and I still want to live with him and raise our child, but i don't want a r...
A. 27 July 2015: You should NOT buy a house with him OR live with him if you don't think you love him. THAT wouldn't be fair on him. HE might WANT to be with someone who LOVES him for who he is, not just want to live with him because you made a child together.
... (read in full...)
At this rate I don't want to have sex with him. What can I do about our volatile on or off relationship?
Q. I am 30 and my boyfriend is 29. We are in an on/off relationship. He is always the one initiating the breakup when he gets upset or feel attacked/disrespected. We don't live together and we have sex about once a week more or less. We've been back ...
A. 27 July 2015: I think you two have a LOT of unresolved issues that maybe you two need to deal with BEFORE getting back together (if at all).
You man is VERY literal, I think and with quite a sense of entitlement. Like he should have sex, when HE wants sex. Tha... (read in full...)
Is this history repeating? Could my current GF be similar to my ex? What can I do?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for nearly 3 years now.. we are planning a baby and to buy a house together. Sometimes we have blazing rows which out me in bad form. Last blazing row we had ... I started thinking about my ex. Just curiosit...
A. 27 July 2015: It might be the type of women you gravitate towards? Maybe they are very independent (or whatever it is that makes you two butt heads).
Comparing her to the ex though is "mean" of you - it almost seems like you are looking for a way out? Before t... (read in full...)
How come men get away with playing reverse psychology with women when they are dead wrong?
Q. How come men get away with playing reverse psychology with women when they are dead wrong? I snooped and found something that i really wanted answers to. If its true i will have trust issues with my husband. Well, i tried to control myself but he s...
A. 27 July 2015: By asking him if he was hiding anything you gave him a blanket accusation (basically you told him, I think you are doing something you shouldn't be doing, but I won't say what I'm accusing you off, I'm JUST accusing you).
IF you snooped and foun... (read in full...)
Snooping and led to Betrayal by my husband and alledgedly double life
Q. My life suddenly just collapsed in front of me. I just found out the man i married 5mths ago has another family in the UK. What should i do. I feel like dying. I met my husband through a mutual friend last yr. He told me about his baby mama who he c...
A. 27 July 2015: What nationality is he? I'm curious.
And what nationality is the wife?
And still he arranged for the WIFE to take a trip with HER two kids to Aruba... You really think if she meant nothing and the second child might not be his... that he w... (read in full...)
Does anyone else feel like the black sheep in their family? If so how do you deal with it?
Q. Hello, Does anyone else feel like the black sheep in their family? If so how do you deal with it? My family has always been close, we were all raised well and are good people. But as I have got older I am starting to feel more and more l...
A. 27 July 2015: Who hosts those "gatherings" that you are not invited to? If it's your parents (mostly) I'd bring it up that you feel a bit left out. Same if it's either of your siblings.
They might feel you are more of a independent spirit that the other tw... (read in full...)
Did potential date over react to my question
Q. i joined a dating site a few month ago and have been chatting to a guy for a couple of month. everything is going well and we plan on meeting this week. we have since exchanged phone numbers and have emailed each other a couple of pictures and when ...
A. 27 July 2015: I agree with Ciar.
You "happily" talk to him for 2 months and then when it's meeting time you suddenly want to make sure you are not being "catfished"? I am not sure I would have spend 2 whole months chatting to someone if they gave of a "weird v... (read in full...)
He wouldn't go public with our relationship so I ended it. Did I make the right decision?
Q. He says his marriage is ended and they have both moved on but he wont go public with our relationship or remove his "married to... [her name]" Facebook status. Did I do the right thing ending it after giving him the ultimatum remove the status and ...
A. 27 July 2015: Yes, he IS still married, so why bother be his "gf"?
Facebook status means nothing in the bigger picture. BUT HIM not being fully divorced and still want to seem like he is married to her? THAT makes all the reason to dump him and move on.
A... (read in full...)
If I don't have children now, is this my only chance? what if I regret it?
Q. Hey everyone, this is how I truly feel but I wonder whether anyone else has felt this way? I'm nearing mid 30's and my partner and I have been trying for 2 years to get pregnant to no avail. It's been a horrible, stressful time. The longer...
A. 27 July 2015: Only you can really know if you will regret it, but I have to ask have you not seen a doctor? A fertility expert?
And your partner, how does he feel about it all?... (read in full...)
Is there hope that this mostly LD relationship can survive? Should I give him another chance?
Q. My bf and I have been together for a couple years. Half of our time has been together in person and the other half of it has been long distance. We are still currently long distance. However, after quitting his job (they were going to fire hi...
A. 26 July 2015: If you still have feelings for him and think you can make it work, I'd make some ground rules.
I would NOT let him move in with you and live OFF you while he looks for work.
OP if you are the same girl who asked a couple of weeks ago, I thi... (read in full...)
Long term is he the man for me? Should I stay or go?
Q. Hello, I have been living with my boyfriend for over a year, and we have been together for a year and a half. Right now I am very seriously considering breaking up with him, but I am having a hard time making a choice. In many ways he is very g...
A. 26 July 2015: Honestly, I think you two are square peg/pound hole. Which is if you use a hammer you might make it fit.
The guy has a lot of issues, that CAN'T be fixed (by any amount of love from you) He needs to fix those himself. The fact that he is either A... (read in full...)
He's 30. Should I try to enjoy some fun with this guy or back off?
Q. So, I met this guy and feel like there was an attraction between is. Since then, we've been chatting on Facebook and I feel well probably do coffee or something at some point. I know I'm getting a little ahead, but I've been thinking if I sh...
A. 26 July 2015: Do you date guys to impress friends or family? Or for yourself?
He may not be (at first glance) a good match. He may not be a good match once you meet in person. OR he might surprise you and be a decent fella.
The biggest disadvantage in ... (read in full...)
So...she has a boyfriend, will she ever choose me?
Q. Hi ladies and gentlemen. I've known this girl for about a year now. I liked her from afar initially, knowing she has a boyfriend. We hit it off real well and everything, and after some time feelings between us develop, so to say. This is all ...
A. 25 July 2015: If she hasn't left him yet, for you... then she isn't going to. And that is something YOU should have considered before getting involved emotionally and physically with a girl who has a BF.
And specially with a girl who is willing to cheat on... (read in full...)
Is it normal not to want to perform oral sex on a man after just having sex?
Q. I love my husband. We are married 8 years and he was my first sexual partner. I was always the prudish type! Not by choice but i think by fact of low self esteem and the fact I probably have no confidence. I have only in the last maybe year or so ...
A. 25 July 2015: Maybe start OUT with fellatio? As part of the foreplay? (without getting him off, of course) That way it's "clean" and it might make it easier for you to deal with.
... (read in full...)
I made a comment about a person and my friend came back on me saying things that really hurt!
Q. I am friends with this girl and we were out together the other day, and I said a remark about a random stranger saying that she is fat, she doesn't need any more chocolate (because she was buying so many bags) and now my friend has had a go at me ...
A. 25 July 2015: Talk to your friend and tell her the same.
Bet you she will be glad to know that you actually gave it some thought.... (read in full...)
Did I cut him off too quickly?
Q. Ok so i was dating i had met a guy online. We had been dating for around two weeks and from the first we clicked instantly. We had gotten along so well that we were speaking everyday throughout the day he had told his family and friends about me and ...
A. 25 July 2015: I'm ALL for people using their gut-instinct, but I think at times when we have "skeletons in the closet" or past bad experiences that it's easy to jump the gun on people.
I don't think you can EXPECT to be trusting someone 100% from knowing ... (read in full...)
I don't feel I owe him an "official" break up. My friend says I left my bf for minor reasons. Did I?
Q. Is it immature to leave a long term boyfriend for minor reasons? My bf has never spent any of his birthdays with me for the almost six years we've been together. It too four years for me to meet his mum and I've never been invited to family ...
A. 25 July 2015: I agree with Ciar, in light of the update - it's over and you don't need to tell him.
The return of the camera was the "end".
However, I would in the future make my intentions WAY more clear.... (read in full...)
I don't feel I owe him an "official" break up. My friend says I left my bf for minor reasons. Did I?
Q. Is it immature to leave a long term boyfriend for minor reasons? My bf has never spent any of his birthdays with me for the almost six years we've been together. It too four years for me to meet his mum and I've never been invited to family ...
A. 25 July 2015: I agree with Ciar, in light of the update - it's over and you don't need to tell him.
The return of the camera was the "end".
However, I would in the future make my intentions WAY more clear.... (read in full...)
I should have listened to my mum's warning about this man
Q. I have let my Mum down by my actions the past while. I met a older man at work, he was always helping me and being friendly. The man has a wife so I always thought he seen me as just work-mate. After working there a while I had saved up enough ...
A. 25 July 2015: YOU DO NOT OWE him sex or sexual advances because he CHOSE to help you.
He can't all of a sudden bill you, when he hasn't discussed costs or time with you.YOU two do not have a VERBAL or WRITTEN agreement of payment.
The guy is a disgusting pie... (read in full...)
Snooping and led to Betrayal by my husband and alledgedly double life
Q. My life suddenly just collapsed in front of me. I just found out the man i married 5mths ago has another family in the UK. What should i do. I feel like dying. I met my husband through a mutual friend last yr. He told me about his baby mama who he c...
A. 25 July 2015: I would contact a solicitor and see what YOU can do. But yes, I can't see WHY you can't walk away.... (read in full...)
I'm horny and unsatisfied but not sure if I'n ready for sex
Q. Dear Cupid, is it normal to feel horny most of the time? I am 17 (which is the legal age for sex) and I have a boyfriend. I dont want to pressure him into anything though as I am not sure he's ready. But I feel really horny a lot of the time and ...
A. 24 July 2015: Yes, your body is going to a rise in hormones ( the closer you get to ovulation time the hornier you will feel). It's pretty common, but while it can at times be a little HARD to see clearly though that "horny-haze" remember that there IS NO hurry ... (read in full...)
Is he trying to say that he loves me?
Q. Hello, a guy talks to me alot, he flirts alot and compliments me very much. He asked me 3 times in every while for my number but i accepted to give him my number at the third time. Once i was talking to him he said that 'im a talkative person', and ...
A. 24 July 2015: You should be honest with him. The sooner the better. HE is interested in more then being your friend. The fact that he didn't give up trying to get your number makes me think he DOES like you, he IS infatuated with you (not love) and to sooner you ... (read in full...)
Is it normal not to want to perform oral sex on a man after just having sex?
Q. I love my husband. We are married 8 years and he was my first sexual partner. I was always the prudish type! Not by choice but i think by fact of low self esteem and the fact I probably have no confidence. I have only in the last maybe year or so ...
A. 24 July 2015: I know how you feel, but there are (like FA so excellently put it) many discrete ways at getting around it.
If you usually have sex in the bedroom, have USEFUL items in the drawer next to the bed, wipes (don't get scented as they can sting an... (read in full...)
Is it normal to get turned on watching lesbian porn?
Q. I just wanna know, is it normal how turned on I get watching lesbian porn? I am a 17 year old girl who is only romantically and emotionally attracted to boys. I could never see myself in a relationship or married to a woman, not that there's ...
A. 24 July 2015: You are watching a woman get off... (basically) so yes, it can be a turn off for another woman and has nothing to do with your sexual "classification" or label.
Boobs are great. I don't think anyone would tell you otherwise and again, NOT an indic... (read in full...)
I think my ex is on drugs and he wants no contact from me but I care and wish I could help him
Q. (Mod Note: OP is in early 30's) I was with my ex for 3 years. At the beginning of the year I noticed a change in him. He became distant and moody and would snap at me for no reason. After a row one day he broke things off saying he didn't love me ...
A. 24 July 2015: Stay FAR FAR away. I wouldn't be surprised that he ended it with you to "keep" you safe from his "real" life (that "real" life that involves drugs and unpleasant people).
This guy, no matter his faults.... DID the right thing is letting you go. ... (read in full...)
I made a comment about a person and my friend came back on me saying things that really hurt!
Q. I am friends with this girl and we were out together the other day, and I said a remark about a random stranger saying that she is fat, she doesn't need any more chocolate (because she was buying so many bags) and now my friend has had a go at me ...
A. 24 July 2015: So it's OK for you to say comments about random strangers, but when a FRIEND points out that it's NOT a nice trait to do so, you get upset?
It really doesn't matter WHO you criticize friend or stranger, it's rude and no one asked for your opinion ... (read in full...)
I don't feel I owe him an "official" break up. My friend says I left my bf for minor reasons. Did I?
Q. Is it immature to leave a long term boyfriend for minor reasons? My bf has never spent any of his birthdays with me for the almost six years we've been together. It too four years for me to meet his mum and I've never been invited to family ...
A. 24 July 2015: I don't think it's minor reasons to feel ignored, to be made feel unimportant or even non-essential to his life.
BUT I do think you "owe" him a "I'm breaking up with you as I see us going no where and I want more, I wish you well but I'm done." N... (read in full...)
Is it normal to end up having a real dislike of your first love?
Q. Is it normal to end up having a real dislike of your first love? The fact is - when I was at college 20 years ago - I fell for this guy and we started dating ( my first proper relationship). It lasted on and off for about 6-7 years and then we...
A. 24 July 2015: I agree I don't think it's the norm to have such resentment for the "first love" either.
Maybe because it went from a loving relationship to a "let's use each other for sex" love was "lost" and you ended up feeling empty when thinking of him? And... (read in full...)
Thinking about making him go through courts to see his child, but is that fair?
Q. My family and a lot of my friends say I should tell my ex boyfriend that he can't have anything to do with our unborn child when he arrives since he has made hardly any effort to be there for me when I have needed him since he started a new ...
A. 24 July 2015: Go through the courts. THAT way it is in writing and you BOTH have to abide by the rules.
I think a little bit of this has to do with you being 1. pregnant and 2. a bit jealous that you got replaced so soon.
Honestly, I get that you don't w... (read in full...)
Snooping and led to Betrayal by my husband and alledgedly double life
Q. My life suddenly just collapsed in front of me. I just found out the man i married 5mths ago has another family in the UK. What should i do. I feel like dying. I met my husband through a mutual friend last yr. He told me about his baby mama who he c...
A. 23 July 2015: He is NOT your husband. You are not legally married to this guy, the ceremony is not valid in the eyes of the law, and I'm sorry.. but WHY would have a ceremony when his divorce wasn't final? That's... CRAZY! Or you are a VERY naive person. (no ... (read in full...)
My fiance promised we'd all move in to his house together. I can't pay the costs and he won't pay. Do I walk away now?
Q. I've been with my partner for 6 years. We got engaged last year. My son and I live with my dad after the death of my mum last year. The plan was to move in with my partner once an extension on the house has been completed as it is currently too ...
A. 23 July 2015: How old is your son?
Maybe if he is an adult it DOES make more sense to NOT build on to a house for a 18+ "kid". But with that said, it's HIS house, if he KNEW that there needed to be added room to the house for you two to move in, the COST is ... (read in full...)
I don't want to feel guilty about the money I was awarded as compensation
Q. Two years ago I was raped by my best friend's boyfriend, it had a terrible affect on my life, I gave up work because I worked in a shop and I just couldn't face talking to people, I lost my home because I couldn't afford the rent and had to move in ...
A. 23 July 2015: I think your mom wasn't really thinking what she said. I would have been utterly upset too if I were you.
He did NOT do you a "favor". I bet you 100% of rape survivors would rather NEVER have gone through rape then get compensation. And I think yo... (read in full...)
He fist bumps me at least 7 times during a work day. what is his problem?
Q. This guy i work with keeps fist bumping me for no reason. He keeps saying my name whenever I walk by. Keeps saying 'good job', in a funny way, even though he hasnt deen what I did or didnt do. I ask why he just says stuff like that, he awkwardl...
A. 23 July 2015: Awww the poor guy is throwing a tantrum because you aren't bending over backwards to "adore" and "worship" him... Seriously he needs to grow up.
He is just an attention monger... nothing else. And the fact that he HAS a GF.... Yes, I'd avoid ge... (read in full...)
Does my boyfriend have 2 phones linked to facebook?
Q. Ok I was with my guy quite recently and I noticed his phone went off - he was out of the room so I didn't answer it but I saw the number. Didn't think anything of it - a few days later, I was gong through my phone and I thought 'I wonder who that ...
A. 23 July 2015: Ask him?
None of us has any way of knowing this.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend claims he is still on a dating app just to make friends?
Q. So I've been seeing this guy and we have met loads of times, been on plenty of dates, ive met his family and stayed at his and are now dating for about two months and ive noticed hes still on the dating app... which i find insulting.. but he says ...
A. 23 July 2015: I'm with WiseOwlE
He isn't serious about you if he is still "fishing" the pond (being on dating sites) he might claim he is making friends, but really... they are ALL girls?
Would YOU go look for MALE friend on a dating site/app ? Or if... (read in full...)
How do I find out what web sites my husbands on and see his profiles
Q. How do i find out what web sites my husbands on and see his profiles...
A. 22 July 2015: I believe you can google his e-mail address and see what pops up.
He might not use his work one, but if you know his personal one it might help.
You ask about HIS profiles, so you KNOW he is on dating or other websites?... (read in full...)
My wife is jealous of my new employee
Q. In April I hired a new female employee who is 10 years younger than I am. She wasn't my first choice, but my employer said I could not hire my first choice for some reasons they say they cannot disclose to me because of privacy. Ever since...
A. 22 July 2015: Is there a reason for her *to put it mildly* irrational behavior?
Have you talked OVERLY much about this or other female co-workers in the past? Sometimes people tend to go on an on about new people that they enjoy (can be on a TOTALLY platonic... (read in full...)
FWB rules-what's appropriate and what's not?
Q. I'm getting ready to get into a fwb situation for the first time in my life. This is someone I dated a long time ago for 5 years. Since the BU, there are no lingering emotions. We f***** well together and are both wanting to start that up again. I ...
A. 22 July 2015: That's between the two of you. I don't think there ARE any rules set in stone about FWB. Except.. that if you (or he) find someone they WANT to be with relationship-wise - the FWB usually goes away or goes back to a friendship.
Some people h... (read in full...)
He fist bumps me at least 7 times during a work day. what is his problem?
Q. This guy i work with keeps fist bumping me for no reason. He keeps saying my name whenever I walk by. Keeps saying 'good job', in a funny way, even though he hasnt deen what I did or didnt do. I ask why he just says stuff like that, he awkwardl...
A. 19 July 2015: I think he just likes attention from the females. The more girls "sighing" over him the more "manly" he feels.
If he has gotten used to the younger crowd of girls all "crush" on him he might be trying to include you in his little bunch of girl ... (read in full...)
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