How to tell my Mum by Boyfriend is Bi?
Q. There's a guy I've known for a year from Glasgow who I got introduced to at a mate's birthday party... I'd like to think we're good mates, but we do have a friends with benefits relationship... Only problem is, it was one of his mate's birthday'...
A. 11 November 2015: His sexual preference is NOT her business no matter how close you are. IF HE wants to talk to your mom about it, that is another thing. I don't think it's for YOU to share.
Being bi-sexual should be irrelevant in YOUR relationship with him. All... (read in full...)
Has he changed or is he still the player he was before?
Q. I'll keep things simple. I met this guy a few years ago. We got along really well and I started to like him as more than just a friend(but I never told him how I felt). He said he liked me and wanted me to give him a chance. Life got in the way a...
A. 11 November 2015: So on top of you not really being all that interested he is ignoring what you say ( no thanks, but we can be friends) and keeps trying to "change" your mind.... Yes, that is another red flag.
I know there are guy out there who think that the way ... (read in full...)
Has he changed or is he still the player he was before?
Q. I'll keep things simple. I met this guy a few years ago. We got along really well and I started to like him as more than just a friend(but I never told him how I felt). He said he liked me and wanted me to give him a chance. Life got in the way a...
A. 10 November 2015: I'd skip this one.
And I'll tell you why.
He has repeatedly told OTHER people in front of you that YOU are not his type and when he got no reaction from that other than a shrug, he dialed it up a notch - now he claims that is he infatuated wi... (read in full...)
In dating, I don't want to be wasting my time if he's not interested! Any suggestions?
Q. Hi Advice please- I've been seeing this guy for about 3 months now and he used to reply straight away and now he waits days and says sorry he's been really busy. I really like him, I assume he likes me and wants to carry on seeing each other, b...
A. 10 November 2015: I agree, this is a case of... he is just not that into you.
I can see someone after YEARS of being together not taking the time to read and respond to a text fairly fast. Now there can of course be circumstances where a person can't text back as... (read in full...)
Should I explore the topic of three- and foursomes with my wife?
Q. So my wife and I have been friends with another couple for years. Got along great, no issues. They moved away a few years ago and recently came to visit. It was like they never left, just amazing friendship. All four of us are relatively young...
A. 10 November 2015: I think if you want a happy and healthy marriage... you keep this fantasy to yourself.
There is a HUGE difference from fantasy to reality.
And while your wife, yourself and the other couple have great fun, flirtation and banter doesn't mean it ... (read in full...)
Am I supposed to enjoy this?
Q. Im hoping you can help me answer some questions relating to sexuality. So the other day my wife was performing oral sex on me, and when she was in the act; she licked her finger and started playing around with my anus while performing oral ...
A. 10 November 2015: She was simply stimulating your prostate and THAT is why it felt good. The prostate is the male version of a woman's g-spot. This small, chestnut-sized bump is located approximately two inches inside a man’s rectum, and when massaged or stimulated, ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a virgin to feel horny?
Q. Helo. Ok i want to know if its usual to be horny even when you never had sex before. I am a virgin but sometimes i crave sex. If its normal, how do i control it since i have no boyfriend and im waiting to have my first time with someone very special ...
A. 10 November 2015: Normal.
Virgin or not.... most people crave intimacy, sex and attention.
... (read in full...)
Is it ok for my boyfriend to discuss our relationship with his adult daughter?
Q. Is it ok for my boyfriend to discuss our relationship issues with his adult daughter? He raised her alone from when she was 16 (now 26) and he says they tell each other everything. I adore his daughter and am trying to build a relationship with ...
A. 10 November 2015: I think it's rather detrimental for the relationship when he involves her in your arguments, and I think it's a HUGE no-no for him to tell you about YOUR personal struggles. THAT is NOT for him to share. NOT one bit. THAT is what I would call ... (read in full...)
Hiding his phone and being uncommunicative. Time to break up?
Q. I started dating this guy and we hit it off pretty well. although, these last two weeks have been rockey with him and I. A two weeks ago I told him that we should take a break he said No there is no point. The week after that I said lets take a ...
A. 10 November 2015: Stop trying to cater to him!
Just call him and end it, whether he wants a break or not doesn't matter, if you are DONE being ignored. He sees the "break" as time for him to not figure out how to fix things but legitimate time for him to fully ig... (read in full...)
Should I change my plans? How do I tell him he'll have to live alone while I go on my preplanned vacation?
Q. My bf and I are were looking to move together and finally we found an apartment and got approved. But the move in date is the exact day that Im leaving on vacation for a month and a half. I am kind of scared to tell him im leaving for that long bec...
A. 10 November 2015: Why doesn't he know about the vacation already? Why the secrecy?
It shouldn't be a big deal that you have a pre-planned vacation coming up.
And hopefully your BF is a "big boy" who can manage to be alone in a new apartment while you are go... (read in full...)
Do older men who are dating have something to prove to themselves?
Q. Do older men who are dating have something to prove to themselves? I met a older guy online and he is in his early 50s, where I have just turned 40. He's played hot and cold from the start. Seemed very interested then disappeared only to return s...
A. 10 November 2015: I think it has less to do with the size of his penis and more to do with his ego. He may NOT even be looking for anything serious. Just to get easy sex. and the Internet dating sites can provide that in spades.
The fact that SO many women will agr... (read in full...)
Do I stay with a depressed man who hides our relationship from his ex?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 18 months and I honestly thought he was the love of my life up until he started treating me differently. He was the kindest, gentlest man who would love me dearly every day. Around 6 months ago he started acting s...
A. 10 November 2015: I'm with Janniepeg.
This is NOT your "monkey" to fix. He should NOT be out there dating if he isn't ready mentally. While he told his parents, and that is good... He USING his ex to hide you.
So she said if he starts to date anyone there wil... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to have deal breakers in relationships?
Q. My Boyfriend and I have been together for a year. Recently we talked about deal breakers. Both of us agreed cheating is a deal breaker. Then I told him if he ever took drugs at a party it'd be a deal breaker for me. I did not know he used to do ...
A. 10 November 2015: Having deal-breakers is NOT about how much you love someone else, but how much you LOVE yourself.
We ALL have limits, boundaries and deal-breakers. That is part of life.
What he is saying that that you should just SUCK it up and let him do a... (read in full...)
I can look past the religious stuff to give it a shot with him, what do I do?
Q. We got coffee, the next day he said we couldn't be more than friends cause I'm not is religion. We kept hanging out as friends, but he kept flirting and taking me out. Then he came over one night, we watched tv and talked a bunch, eventually he ...
A. 9 November 2015: I'd cut it off. I think while he doesn't want to DATE/MARRY you he might be inclined to have some casual sex with you and then "blame" you for enticing him later on.
End it. HE is NOT a friend, and there is no future with him.
... (read in full...)
My potential fiance has insecurities due to past experiences. Do I wait for her to heal? Or do I move on?
Q. My potential fiance is scared of being hurt and her insecurity is a result of her past and currently refuses engagement. Her mother calls me a great guy and the 'right one' for her and her siblings i get along with. I did not get a chance to meet ...
A. 9 November 2015: While I'm NOT familiar with your customs I would say:
I would give her some space, but at the same time I think SHE needs to be honest with you. Whether she actually SEES you as a suitor or if the "being scared" her way of letting you down eas... (read in full...)
Am I horribly inconsiderate for not being ready when my bf expects me to be?
Q. Hi, we have more problems than this in our relationship and maybe it's doomed but I'd just like to get some outside perspective on this one issue. This has happened two or more times already, two times recently. One early evening he drove an hour to ...
A. 9 November 2015: Being late is a pet peeve of mine. I can't stand it. There is the "fashionably 30 min." late, which I can abide by, but other than that? If someone is invited to an event or a home-cooked meal, I think it's very very rude to show up late. Being on ... (read in full...)
How do I explain to my 5 year old about her dad not being reliable to be in her life?
Q. I feel confused over what is the best thing to do in regards to my daughter's relationship with her dad. Although he is a good dad when he is there, he has been in and out of her life so much ever since she was born, I'm worried she will grow up...
A. 9 November 2015: I'd say try it. Don't make it a routine until you feel it's working. And I would make sure the new GF is on board with it as I'm BETTING she is the one doing the MAJORITY of the interactions with YOUR daughter, not him.
You BF sounds pretty i... (read in full...)
Is it inappropriate to wear sleeveless to interviews? (I am the interviewer)
Q. I recently got promoted to a role that required me to conduct interviews. My company is on a hiring spree lately so am busy interviewing several candidates daily. Where I work, it is very hot. Most people wear light and comfortable clothing to the ...
A. 9 November 2015: I'm with Tisha.
It's ridiculous that a GROWN man can't focus on the interview but gets fixated on your "bare" shoulders. But I guess it's an easy way to separate the "might hire" from the "not going to hire".
And I also agree with the notion ... (read in full...)
I told my crush how I felt about her and she replied 'so cute'
Q. I sent my crush a long paragraph saying that I liked her and stuff and all she responded was "So Cute" with a bunch of Heart of emojis... what does this mean??? ...
A. 9 November 2015: I agree with Ciar.
She didn't reply with HOW she felt, one way or another. So she basically said thank you and no more.
I don't think she is as into you as you are into her.
And that is the thing about crushes. She doesn't OWE you to like ... (read in full...)
My best friend is beginning to annoy me
Q. Hello Thank you for taking time to read this, This question is a about a friendship nor a relationship but it's very important so I decided to ask. So let me cut to the chase and tell you my problem. I have a friend who's been my best fri...
A. 9 November 2015: Ah, there IS a bit of envy going on, but also she is more busy making MORE/NEW friends that BE a good friend to you. So in that case I'd start to do the same, yes, you live close by and have classes but that doesn't mean you are joined at the hip. ... (read in full...)
Why are you still single?
Q. The last couple of guys who have been interested in dating me have all asked this question. From the little they know about me ( in the phase just before dating), they state how amazing of a catch I am, and wonder why it is that nobody has scooped ...
A. 8 November 2015: I do think there is an odd double-standard about hitting 30 for a woman and a man. While many think that by 30 a woman SHOULD be settled down with kids it's not considered strange that some men are still single.
I would NOT take it as an insult. ... (read in full...)
My daughter's mother needs a place to stay but g/f won't like it. Should I just sneak her in and out?
Q. My daughter's mother just got out of jail/rehab, very suddenly and unexpectedly. Apparently she has no place to go, and misses her daughter so she asked to move in with me and my gf, temporarily (a few months) to get back on her feet. We do have ...
A. 8 November 2015: No, you do not sneak in the ex.
You EX needs to find a halfway house solution or even use a homeless shelter, or HER family or maybe even yours. I am sorry, I don't care how jealous your GF is, this is HER home, HER house.
And I do think if yo... (read in full...)
I made a mistake, hurt my friend and now I don't know how to make things right!
Q. Hey what's up guys, Kind of messed things up with a friend of mine. She asked me a question last night saying do guys know when girls are wearing too much makeup? And I said I think so, and she proceeded to show me a picture and said do you thin...
A. 8 November 2015: I agree with Ciar.
There is being honest and then there is using honesty to be rude. Like there is criticism and CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. Always remember the difference and that fact that no matter what, there IS a human being on the other end of a... (read in full...)
Why does my husband always defend his mom but won't back me up?
Q. Hello aunties, The past year has been stressful, hurtful, and downright annoying for me. The reason I am experiencing these emotions is because my husband has been neglecting to acknowledge my feelings but sticks up for other women who are go...
A. 8 November 2015: My guess is that during his adolescence he watched his parents fight/argue and was the one his mom confided in, the one she vented to. And because she confided things to him he believed HER version and could find NO faults with her. She probably was ... (read in full...)
Fearful I'll suffer a STD like HIV. Do I need professional therapy or counselling for my fear?
Q. As the previous questions that I've posted on this site indicate, I was previously in the habit of patronizing the services of sex workers on a regular basis. However, about a year ago, I gave up this past time, largely due to my fear of ...
A. 8 November 2015: So with the update (and thanks for that OP! it's always nice to get a little more details).
I do think some Cognitive-behavioral therapy would do you good. I have OCD and went through some pretty effective CBT therapy in my late teens. It didn't "... (read in full...)
He called to say he'd been cheating. Do people usually tell the truth while drunk?
Q. Dear Cupid I am with my current boyfriend for 4 years, we have our ups and downs and i love him and he says the same though some times i do feel he doesn't love me as much as i love him. Long story short, yesterday he had few drinks too ...
A. 8 November 2015: I too would take it for the truth. He really had no reason to lie. It's not like he can play it of as a joke, because THAT is just not funny.
So what do you do now? You consider yourself single. You pack up his crap and ask a mutual friend to pa... (read in full...)
I need my ex off the cell phone bill. How do I get them to accept this transfer? My ex will not speak to me.
Q. Ok, so my ex and I were together for almost three years. We combined our cellphone bill a year into the relationship, but we broke up 4 months ago. I've been paying it since he's been out of a job but we're not together anymore. He recently took up...
A. 8 November 2015: I am with WiseOwlE
You have TRIED to be nice and transfer the phone and got nowhere, you TRIED to ask his mom to accept the transfer and she refused, so SHUT OFF the phone.
Call or even better GO to the service provider and EXPLAIN why you ... (read in full...)
Would you break up with your boyfriend over taking secret nude photos
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for over 4 years. I always thought we got along great. We have a lot in common. He is always there for me in my time of need. We have been talking about getting married. I needed some pictures off his camera, so...
A. 7 November 2015: Now I remember you posting about this before (unless you are a new OP with eerie similar experiences )
If you are the SAME OP - the obviously previous advice given wasn't used as you are still with him.
If you are a new OP - you have to deci... (read in full...)
Should I ignore, confront or just walk away, after what she's done?
Q. Here's my dilemma. I just found out that my g/f of 2 years has been emailing an ex. She initiated the conversation and then, over the course of five or six emails, mentioned that she still thinks of him often, then ended the last one with by calling ...
A. 7 November 2015: Wouldn't it hurt even more to stay with her? Knowing what you know?
Now the other dude doesn't owe you fidelity, she kind of does as your GF. My guess is she would claim it was all in "jest" or a personal joke between them and you are overacti... (read in full...)
Is it OK to get back in contact with my ex - and offer to just be friends?
Q. I'm happy in my relationship now but miss my ex, as a person, not who I want to get back with. Is it OK to get back in contact to be friends or not? He's the only other person I've been in love with and after 3 years I still can't get him out of m...
A. 7 November 2015: Hmm..
3 years after the break up you suddenly miss him and want him around as a friend... If I were your BF, I would not be too keen on this and I think you are deluding yourself a bit as to your motives for all of a sudden "want" him back in ... (read in full...)
Have had a crush on a special lady I've known for years, but is she just leading me on?
Q. Dear Cupid, Let me set the scene, I am a designer who is tall and head over heels for one spesh lady. I have many issues, this being one of them. I have a crush on a girl from uni. Since we graduated, she's been chatting to me loads. She ...
A. 7 November 2015: I think when a girl invites you out and invite you over and ALWAYS have friends around at the same time, she regards you as a friend. And if she ALWAYS drags friends with her when YOU invite her out, it's pretty obvious that she isn't looking to be ... (read in full...)
Fearful I'll suffer a STD like HIV. Do I need professional therapy or counselling for my fear?
Q. As the previous questions that I've posted on this site indicate, I was previously in the habit of patronizing the services of sex workers on a regular basis. However, about a year ago, I gave up this past time, largely due to my fear of ...
A. 7 November 2015: Yes I do think you should talk to a professional. I think it's part OCD and part something else. I actually think your view of women is the bigger issue here.
Is there a reason that you only see woman as someone or should I say "some thing" t... (read in full...)
Should I ignore, confront or just walk away, after what she's done?
Q. Here's my dilemma. I just found out that my g/f of 2 years has been emailing an ex. She initiated the conversation and then, over the course of five or six emails, mentioned that she still thinks of him often, then ended the last one with by calling ...
A. 7 November 2015: If he is her former therapist it was definitely NOT a professional affair.. Therapist and client? not at all professional of the therapist...
Around the time she wrote the first e-mail has anything happened? job loss, fight with you, other lo... (read in full...)
What could be causing boobs to start hurting? Could it be my bra? Or..?
Q. Okay so! About a week ago my boobs hurt so bad for two days and then one morning I woke up and they grew probably close to a cup size. They felt a lot better but now my boobs hurt again all day but when I take my bra off for bed they feel better. Do ...
A. 7 November 2015: Maybe for the time being switch to a sports bra and definitely stay away from under-wire ones. Always make sure your bra actually FITS your body. Most women wear the wrong size. http://www.womenshealthmag.com/style/how-should-a-bra-fit
Like ... (read in full...)
How could he let another woman come between us?
Q. I was with my boyfriend for 5 years. We have 1 daughter together. Our relationship started going downhill ever since I caught him talking inappropriately with another woman. I trusted that he wouldn't continue doing it but in the back of my mind ...
A. 7 November 2015: I'm sorry, it's never a pleasant experience feeling "replaced" in a other person's affections.
How could he do it? Well you are both young, had a child and were together (without making the commitment to marriage) for 5 years - for some it's too... (read in full...)
How do I clean the slate at work? My boss thinks I am too helpful!
Q. Hey guys please help I feel low I need help to restore my reputation at work I started 13 weeks ago and don't laugh but every week continuously was bringing in sweets etc trying to be nice with my team it was good to start But other areas n...
A. 6 November 2015:
You can bring in sweets and still be professional IMHO - however if people start to EXPECT that you bring in snacks once a week then I would stop.
IF you think it's the snacks/sweets that makes your boss thing you are not professional... (read in full...)
3 year limbo: close but not together and now there's a new guy
Q. Here's the thing. I met this guy three years ago and we got into a relationship pretty quickly. Longo story short, we broke up after 3 months (he gave me no explanation). Since then we have still stayed close and have been in a limbo stage w...
A. 6 November 2015: The fact is, that guy A doesn't want you as a GF, but he doesn't want you to move on either. That is why he tries to win you "back" when you are seeing a new guy or give you the silent treatment.
The fact that he doesn't want you to move on, does... (read in full...)
Is she being unfair? Do I need to end the relationship?
Q. I'm having a bit of an issue with my girlfriend of a year and a half. We met and dated for a year long distance before she asked me to move in with her. Actually, she said we'd break up if I didn't, so I gave in and did it. I moved to a state where ...
A. 5 November 2015: So since YOU are working and contributing you should NOT do all the work around the house.
IT should be shared. Have you discussed it with her?
If you already have talked about and nothing changed, what do you see staying with her will change ... (read in full...)
Is she being unfair? Do I need to end the relationship?
Q. I'm having a bit of an issue with my girlfriend of a year and a half. We met and dated for a year long distance before she asked me to move in with her. Actually, she said we'd break up if I didn't, so I gave in and did it. I moved to a state where ...
A. 5 November 2015: I think the year you were long-distance you had a sort of fantasy relationship, then you moved in with her and well, reality happened.
She seems to isolate you, which I really don't like. (and neither, it seems do you). Maybe because SHE doesn't ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants to break up because I'm too clingy
Q. Yesterday my boyfriend said he wanted a break because I'm depressed and to clingy and he can't handle it we have been together for 6 months we are always happy together her said he wants to hang with his friends more . We hang out after school ...
A. 5 November 2015: Let him go. You can't MAKE him want to stay with you. Whether you really ARE clingy or not is a whole other matter. That may just be his "excuse" to dump you. So please don't take that personal. (I know that is hard, but try).
If he is 13-15 li... (read in full...)
As a male inexperienced virgin who feels socially awkward - Should I pay a sex worker to have sex with me for my first time?
Q. Hello I'm a male virgin who's never even kissed a girl nor have I been on a date or had a girlfriend. I'm not particularly good looking and I'm very socially awkward. I figure having no clue about the opposite sex would be a massive turn off....
A. 5 November 2015:
While I could continue debate you on this - this is not the appropriate thread to do it - do you not agree?
... (read in full...)
As a male inexperienced virgin who feels socially awkward - Should I pay a sex worker to have sex with me for my first time?
Q. Hello I'm a male virgin who's never even kissed a girl nor have I been on a date or had a girlfriend. I'm not particularly good looking and I'm very socially awkward. I figure having no clue about the opposite sex would be a massive turn off....
A. 4 November 2015: Now nonny, you may think women have all the sexual power and men none... and I absolutely disagree. History proves otherwise. But your opinions if of course yours to have.
NO ONE, no matter what job they hold or what gender they are, ARE ent... (read in full...)
As a male inexperienced virgin who feels socially awkward - Should I pay a sex worker to have sex with me for my first time?
Q. Hello I'm a male virgin who's never even kissed a girl nor have I been on a date or had a girlfriend. I'm not particularly good looking and I'm very socially awkward. I figure having no clue about the opposite sex would be a massive turn off....
A. 4 November 2015: Anon male
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Any GUY is FULLY allowed to not want to be with a girl who engages or HAS engaged in casual sex. There isn't a double standard there.
Any WOMAN is FULLY allowed to not want to be with a guy who has engaged in sex with ... (read in full...)
As a male inexperienced virgin who feels socially awkward - Should I pay a sex worker to have sex with me for my first time?
Q. Hello I'm a male virgin who's never even kissed a girl nor have I been on a date or had a girlfriend. I'm not particularly good looking and I'm very socially awkward. I figure having no clue about the opposite sex would be a massive turn off....
A. 3 November 2015: I think, as a woman, that a guy PAYING for sex from a sex-worker is FAR more unattractive/a turn off, than a guy who just doesn't have any experience.... yet. If I were in my 20's now, I wouldn't touch a guy who had sex with prostitutes with a ... (read in full...)
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