Is this the old him again
Q. I broke up with my husband two months ago we spent a month apart. We split as he had issue with favoritism towards his kids and a dislike of my eldest girl and my father. He also tried to control me. Generally his attitude stunk towards my kids and ...
A. 12 January 2017: I'd still ask him to move out with his kids. I would NOT let a man RUIN my relationship with MY kids because HE is a petty and jealous man.
You kids have DONE nothing to ruin things, your DAD has done nothing. You HUSBAND on the other hand?
... (read in full...)
Depression, drinking and having to go on holiday abroad
Q. I live with my parents, and i'm currently on medication for depression. when my parents have had holidays, ive been able to look after myself and have behaved. I'm seeing a pyschlogist at the moment who is helping me through my troubles. I asked he...
A. 14 October 2016: It's not your LAST holiday ever. It's the LAST holiday your parents are TAKING you on. You are in your 20's, so an adult. YOU want to go on holiday, you work, you save up, you book a vacation.
You dad is just stating that he no longer wishes t... (read in full...)
Do I ask how my former student is doing? I don't want to overstep any boundaries!
Q. Thank you in advance for all that take the time to give their advice. Not a relationship question however I really would like some opinions. Last year I worked briefly with a student during their last year at school. That same student lived directly ...
A. 14 October 2016: I think that is very kind of you and I don't think it's overstepping to call on them and see how he is doing. As for visiting in the hospital, I don't know. I know some people battling various cancers are "medically" better off not having visitors. ... (read in full...)
Should I not bother meeting him?
Q. I met a man on Facebook and we're meeting up this week.The problem is he is French and lives in Quebec. He speaks broken English from what I've gathered through text messages. English and French isn't my first launguage either but I live in Canada ...
A. 14 October 2016: I would just ignore the calls too.
You can however block him on your Facebook, which I would so asap.
... (read in full...)
Is it bro 'code?
Q. I recently moved to a new area, and I've met a lot of people in the time I've been here. At the very beginning I was swept off my feet by a guy, but ultimately it was just a fling. While that "relationship" was fading, I met a man who happens to ...
A. 14 October 2016: Like N91 mentioned, if you HAVE sent it to the right number, and he hasn't responded he isn't interested.
Unless they are close friends there is no "need" to pull a "bro-code" here.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has a very inappropriate colleague who I'm extremely uncomfortable with; he says he'll avoid her but doesn't match his words
Q. My fiancé works with this girl who I accepted as a friend of ours and as part of our group. He had told me that she had displayed scandalous behaviours in the past (had tried to sleep with him while he had a girlfriend and told him she would never ...
A. 14 October 2016: I think you need to sit him down and ask him this:
HOW would you feel if I had a male colleague who acting like this woman at work?
And how would he feel if YOU just dismissed his feeling about that issue by calling him crazy jealous and he's... (read in full...)
Being strung by my best friend... who has a girlfriend
Q. Hello DearCupid :) I'm struggling with being strung by my best friend. He has a very attractive girlfriend. They have been together for almost 10 years now and I have always respected him for it. He was never an option for me until we screwe...
A. 14 October 2016: See him for who he is. And that is NOT a friend. A friend would NOT take advantage of you, a friend would not play mind games and he CERTAINLY wouldn't make you feel like that WHOLE mess is/was your fault alone.
Make YOU the priority in YOUR lif... (read in full...)
Depression, drinking and having to go on holiday abroad
Q. I live with my parents, and i'm currently on medication for depression. when my parents have had holidays, ive been able to look after myself and have behaved. I'm seeing a pyschlogist at the moment who is helping me through my troubles. I asked he...
A. 14 October 2016: While I get that your psychologist said you could drink two halves of beer, I think it's irresponsible of her to suggest you should even entertain drinking AT ALL. I can't imagine ANY psychologist telling a patient to drink alcohol at all.
You a... (read in full...)
Am I being unfair, insensitive or inconsiderate of my MIL?
Q. I’m at my wits end with my MIL... if it wasn’t bad enough when my partner raced down 107kms to take his mother to the hairdressers when no-one else was available for free, this next exploit beats all. Earlier this year my MIL made flight ...
A. 14 October 2016: I get what Ivy and BimBim are saying. The MIL is going out of her way to get her son to jump through hoops for her. My guess? She is lonely.
Unless this "taxi services" she seems to demand is breaking your budget and bank, I'd let your husband ... (read in full...)
Should I not bother meeting him?
Q. I met a man on Facebook and we're meeting up this week.The problem is he is French and lives in Quebec. He speaks broken English from what I've gathered through text messages. English and French isn't my first launguage either but I live in Canada ...
A. 14 October 2016: He waited til the next day to contact you. So really how "sorry" was he?
And how certain can you be that he would show if you drove all the way to Quebec?
I'd just block him. He is wasting your time.... (read in full...)
Is this relationship worth holding onto?
Q. my girl and I were separated but still living together with a baby. I found out she was talking to someone else, she said she never slept with him but did make out with him and came home with a hickey one day. everything is in the open now and she ...
A. 14 October 2016: Only you can decide if it's "worth" it or not.
YOU can still be a father and not live with the mother or be with her.
What happened that led to the separation in the first place? Is it something the two of you can move on from? Deal with?... (read in full...)
He's not in the least interested so why does he want me in his life?
Q. Hey everyone. a few month ago i went on a date with a guy we then decided to be in a relationship . long story short he wasted my time made excuses not to see me and wasted my time i said its over and dumped him . he wanted to be friends so i kep...
A. 14 October 2016: My guess? He can't handle relationships, he can't handle friendships, but he still WANTS them. BUT on his terms, so in short, he wants whatever HE needs, and screw the other person and their feelings.
My other guess is that this is a pattern ... (read in full...)
Should I not bother meeting him?
Q. I met a man on Facebook and we're meeting up this week.The problem is he is French and lives in Quebec. He speaks broken English from what I've gathered through text messages. English and French isn't my first launguage either but I live in Canada ...
A. 13 October 2016: I'd just block him. It doesn't seem like there is a WHOLE lot of things you two have in common, least of all... the language.
And IF the agreement was for you/him to call and it was just ignored, how will you know he actually shows up for the meet... (read in full...)
My Girlfriend Turned Rude and Immoral, Should I Dump Her?
Q. When we started going out I thought she was a nice girl, she has loads of friends, is liberal, goes to rights protests and that sort of thing. Was also very happy and smiley. However I'm repulsed by her recently. For example she grew up in a bet...
A. 13 October 2016: She seems like a VERY sad and negative person, not the kind that spreads joy, just misery.
The things about her that you do not like are they deal breakers for you? Because it's not likely that she will change. To me, it seems like her attitude... (read in full...)
Is this the old him again
Q. I broke up with my husband two months ago we spent a month apart. We split as he had issue with favoritism towards his kids and a dislike of my eldest girl and my father. He also tried to control me. Generally his attitude stunk towards my kids and ...
A. 13 October 2016: This is WHO he is. He didn't REALLY change, he just "tried" to appease and please you, that is why it didn't last more than 2 weeks. His heart wasn't it in.
The issues you two have weren't resolved while he was away and honestly his "lost" o... (read in full...)
Why do older women like me so much?
Q. It's flattering, I have no problem being with an older woman if I like her, but they are unavailable. A woman I've known for a few years now, Caucasian, 36 years old, and she has had the same boyfriend since before we even met. She's always bee...
A. 13 October 2016: I think it's partly because you play along and partly the kind of women you are around.
If I was your age and saw you flirt with "older" women I'd give you a pass.
There are no rules out that you HAVE to entertain all these women who are in... (read in full...)
Should her locked phone be a deal breaker?
Q. Ok I've been with my woman now for a good bit over 2 years. Nov. 5th, at 9:20, will make 3 year's for us. We've put each other through a lot but the situations she's put me in are far worst than the things I did. We're moving past that. I mean I ...
A. 12 October 2016: Do you think if you had her password and went through her phone on a regular basis that you somehow could control her actions? Stop her from doing things YOU don't feel she should do?
You say the two of you are moving PAST all these issues, but ... (read in full...)
Why get married? How do I tell my family that they're waiting for something that will not happen?
Q. Why is getting married so important!! I'm 25 I have been with my partner 10 years my relationship is fantastic I trust him we get on like best mates there's no drama it is as close to perfect as I could have ever imagined! We own a home 50/50 not...
A. 11 October 2016: I agree with you, up to a point.
However, once kids enter the picture things change.
Legally, you are in a "common law" relationship which gives you SOME (not all) the same protection legally, in the case of death, split up, accidents, etc. ... (read in full...)
She broke off her engagement for me and its freaking me out
Q. So I need opinions. I was seeing this girl for a while last year. She seemed super into me and I liked her a lot but I just wasn't ready or looking for a relationahip at the time. I'd just gotten out of a three year relationship and just wasn't ...
A. 11 October 2016: I think she is rather fickle, to be honest. No one should take an engagement and marriage that lightly, and marrying someone because "well I had nothing better to do that Tuesday" is just mindblowing to me. And not in a good way.
While I DO think... (read in full...)
Am I out of line for asking my b/f to change around his child support situation with his ex?
Q. hello ive been dating my bf for a year now. He is 51 I am 47. He has an ex and three children. I have two children . We live seperatly. He and his ex do not follow the child support schedule its been now 6 years that they have not been together ...
A. 11 October 2016: I wouldn't try and dictate how he does his finances as you are not married, nor engaged or.. living together.
You can suggest he makes the child support official for the sake of the kids. But I think it's really up to him HOW he chooses to do th... (read in full...)
How do I know if she wants me to touch her?
Q. while i was sitting on her bed. I could feel her breast on my leg while she laying down, she didn't even move. She is like 36a for her breast size. Next she putted her breast on my shoulder, when she hugged me from behind. I must admit it felt ...
A. 11 October 2016: ASK her.
She can't hug you from behind and NOT have her breast touch you. They are ATTACHED to her chest. So that in itself is NOT an invitation to touch her boobs.
Maybe do a few mutual massages WITH clothes on and later without.
And ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to use a prostitute to gain experience?
Q. I am a male virgin who has never kissed a girl or been on a date. I've made up my mind recently on how I will be losing my virginity. I am currently saving up money to visit one of the legal brothels in Nevada. I feel like at my age, being a kis...
A. 11 October 2016: I would rather date and sleep with a virgin male, than with one who frequented prostitutes. The latter is definitely coming off as a desperate person more so than the first.
I don't really see anything wrong in a person who is inexperi... (read in full...)
Should I try online dating again ?
Q. I have been single for a while - I am a young professional 31 years old that has tried to find a man for a long time - I've had two relationships one very long term and the other short term- both men were not good guys at all- I've tried the online ...
A. 11 October 2016: The bar/ lounge/ club scene is for people in their late teens/20's - so I'd skip that.
I think Online can work, BUT you got to be VERY selective and you have to accept that 9 out of 10 guys are NOT what you want.
Know your standard and don... (read in full...)
Should I send my ex boyfriend a Christmas card with a small gift?
Q. I have been single for about 4 months now after coming out of a 3 year relationship, I have recently been thinking of him again the relationship ended on bad terms. Its coming up to christmas and it will be weird without him should i send him a ...
A. 11 October 2016: I'm with Auntie BimBim
What is your REAL motivation here? Olive branch? REkinle some kind of contact?
What do you hope will happen if you do send something?
You said it ended badly os why the need to reach out?
I agree, that there are... (read in full...)
Am I being mistreated? Is this emotional abuse?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for 2 years. I don’t know if this is emotional abuse or if there is something I can do to fix the problem. This morning I had gone to make a shake for him and when I poured the material inside ...
A. 11 October 2016: I don't care if he HAS a medical "excuse" this is not OK, you are walking on eggshells around him, your body acts like that of someone who is about to get his and the anxiety? OVERALL it sounds toxic and unhealthy for you.
I think if you don't le... (read in full...)
I'm dating a girl but slept with another girl. Should I feel guilty?
Q. I've recently been dating this girl and things have gone well we've gone out about four times and we kissed for the first time yesterday. After she went I was going on a night out with my friends and friends of theirs. long story short I slept wi...
A. 10 October 2016: If the girl you have been dating is someone you WANT as a serious GF, then stop sleeping with the other girl. That simple.
Don't sit on the fence, it will only hurt your butt. So decide if you want to play the field (casual hook-ups) or you want... (read in full...)
Live In Landlord is being a PAIN. Should I have a word?
Q. I'm applying for my Masters after working a temp job to save for one year, although I don't know where I will be next September yet I'm staying a bit longer in my current city. As my old landlord had family members moving into my place, I found a ...
A. 10 October 2016: There are 3 weeks until November, I'd suck it up if I were you and move out as fast as possible.
Some people have no business renting out and you really won't know till you have lived with them/rented from them.
I had a friend who's landlord d... (read in full...)
I haven't spoken to my boyfriend in 2 months! Is he trying to end things?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for just under a year. In the last two months he has said to me he's been really busy and needs some time and space. He hasn't contacted me for 2 months everytime I message him on what's app he says well chat next week ...
A. 10 October 2016: I think it's over. At least THAT is how I would take it if someone I was dating stopped talking to me for 2 months.
So I'd send him an "I wish you well, good luck in life" text and then BLOCK him. Why should you wait around for him to be "not bus... (read in full...)
How can I gather the pieces from an abusive past?
Q. How can I grow to love myself? I'm a 31 year old woman that on the outiside seems to have the artificial stuff- good jobs- looks - family- love but inside I'm hurting. I would say sadly the only thing I am missing is the guy. I've been with o...
A. 10 October 2016: I think we often gravitate towards the type of person we "think" we deserve. For women (and men) who have been in abusive relationships, the standard becomes lower and lower.
TRYING really hard to be nice and be the "perfect" GF will give you and ... (read in full...)
What should I do next? Go back to the shop and hope to interest her again ?
Q. So I met this girl who works in a cosmetic shop in my local town and after admiring her and getting served by her and making a bit of idle small talk about bath bombs I found my self going back in an hour later claiming I needed more bath bombs. Sh...
A. 10 October 2016: Well, I hope your mom is grateful for all the bath bombs!
And why not go in and give her your number, ask her to give you a text if she wants to go out for drinks or coffee.
If she is interested she will probably pluck up the courage to text/... (read in full...)
Is he into the occult? Are black rings significant?
Q. Dear Aunts I made friends with a guy through facebook. We started chatting , all friendly tho , then I was going through his Facebook likes and things. I saw he liked a lot of Facebook pages such as Free masonry , Mystic Order, Wiccan rit...
A. 10 October 2016: You have made friends with him and you ask US (total strangers who know neither of you) if he is into the occult?
I would be OCCULT if I could tell you!
Ask him. My crystal ball tells me that is the BEST way for you to get those kind of an... (read in full...)
My girlfriend feels smothered by my attention
Q. Hi ladies and gents, My girlfriend has recently said that she felt smothered by my attentiveness...she isn't used to how much I pay attention to what she says and how she feels, I'm not doing anything wrong because I'm lovely and adorable accordi...
A. 9 October 2016: So dial it back.
Tell her that if SHE will start to talk about her day without being "asked" you will try not to ask so many questions.
You two need to find a balance, this is not a disaster. (yet) It's just HER being honest and you not unde... (read in full...)
Why does my ex keep coming in and out of my life?
Q. I posted a thread about an ex who lives 4 hours away and we were on and off for few years...then broke it off for good because he met someone closer.I was devastated and told him we should go seperate ways. He recently came back in my life only ...
A. 9 October 2016: He wants you to be on a constant hold pattern, JUST in case he wants to re-kindle things. You are the backup chick in case he gets lonely or can't find someone else.
My advice? CUT all contact, block him and MOVE on. Don't waste any more time on ... (read in full...)
Guys, do you agree with my strategy to back off? Do you think I made a fool of myself?
Q. Hello all I've seen this type question before but I told him I had feelings really put myself out there and he said you're very sweet. Ouch! Now I know the feelings aren't mutual so I've decided to back off and leave him alone. Is that the ri...
A. 8 October 2016: If you feel the :" you're very sweet" is meant in a patronizing or ... "gentle letdown" sort of way, then yes, I'd back away and leave him be.
It's a little hard to "translate" that sentence when we don't know the circumstances.
Were you two ... (read in full...)
Why did he present as single and not wear any ring? Only telling me later? I broke up, but now he's pursuing me. How do I handle this?
Q. I'm a divorced mom of 2 children. Single for almost 3 years now. I am tall, thin, athletic, and would consider myself a 7.5 – 8, however, six nights a month doesn’t really allow a lot of free time to date. About 7 months ago, I met a very cute ...
A. 8 October 2016: You know I find your situation very sucky for you but also very curious. I'm sorry if I seem a little hard on you, but you are part of this mess, YOU made some bad choices here too.
YOU are allowed to let emotions rule you to a point where yo... (read in full...)
Will he ever make me a priority in his life? Should I move on?
Q. We met online, he said that he thought I was a homebody by my profile. Technically I am - I spend most of my weekdays Netflixing and Gaming, I just like to do things once in awhile. When I was in college I was in a two clubs and a Sorority and thr...
A. 8 October 2016: He is a switch and bait kind of guy.
When you two first "met" and talked he claimed to have the same interests as you to basically wheel you in and make himself look like a good "catch" for you.
However, he didn't WANT to keep up the facade fo... (read in full...)
I've lost my best friend because of his jealous girlfriend
Q. So I've been best friends with a guy since grade school. I haven't seen a lot of him this last year because I've been really busy studying for important exams, but we always kept in regular contact. In that time, he got a girlfriend. I bumped into ...
A. 8 October 2016: Your "friend" is a total dickweed, what a LOSER! Seriously! You should THANK your lucky star that you know what a piece of CRAP he grew up to be. Because NO ONE should treat their friends like he has treated you.
Her? She is a total twat - a bull... (read in full...)
Does anyone have advise for getting pregnant later in life?
Q. This is VERY painful to talk about. I am 39 and my husband is 26. We got pregnant immediately this year in may right after my last period in may. We were overjoyed ofc..I have 6 kids from 2 previous relationships that did not work out. but they were ...
A. 8 October 2016: I'm so sorry for your loss.
I suggest you go see your doctor and GYN. Get a FULL bloodwork, STD (yes that too) and whatever your doctor suggest, done.
I'd also suggest you start charting your ovulation. If you have a whole year before you can m... (read in full...)
Man tries to have sex with you very soon--was he never looking for a relationship in the first place?
Q. I made a Tinder thinking I would find a serious relationship with a guy and had no idea that it was primarily for hook ups. I met a guy and we went on a few dates together. By the 2nd date, he was already trying to get me to come over his place to...
A. 8 October 2016: Tindr is known for being a hookup app more than a dating app. Same with Grindr, Adultfriendfinder, and PoF - doesn't MEAN though that everyone is just there looking to swipe right and bang that person.
I think a guy who "pushes" for sex on the s... (read in full...)
He left me feeling speechless after cancelling the date at the last minute. What should I say to him?
Q. I went on a date with a guy I met online and it went well, I wasn't feeling a huge amount of chemistry but we were able to hold a conversation and 3 days after the date he asked me if I'd like to hang out again, and I agreed. I messaged him late...
A. 7 October 2016: Don't read too much into his actions.
Instead, YOU decide if a guy is someone you want to see again or not. If he cancels LAST minute it can mean a few things, not all bad. One can be an emergency, one can be he regrets asking for a second o... (read in full...)
It seems like the right time but I'm scared
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for a while and i love him a lot and i really want to have sex, and im sure he does too.. but im so nervous and i don’t have a lot of confidence. So i need help.. how can i be more confident of my body??...
A. 7 October 2016: I'd say for starters go have a check up and get on birth control. TALK to your doctor about how LONG it takes the birth control to take FULL effect (can vary from brand to brand/ type to type) Then GO buy condoms and learn how to put them on. ... (read in full...)
Her ex' is hurting and I want to help but...
Q. My girlfriend (age:30) was married for 6 years to some guy she said cheated on her 4 times in 3 years. So she divorced him, he moved out the house, and that's when she met me(age:26) Some months later, she gets a call from a random number, it's her ...
A. 7 October 2016: Personally, I think it was nice of you to be that considerate to her ex, expect it kind of puts you in the middle of "emotional drama" that really IS none of your business.
SHE is over him. And I think HE needs to know that. He should STILL se... (read in full...)
How do I raise this issue with my husband? So that my husband will raise the issue with the girl's mother?
Q. Hi, id just like some advice regarding children as no matter what choice i make i fear im going to upset someone. my husband and i have a son. My husband also still sees his step daughter from his relationship before me. He sees her two Saturday...
A. 7 October 2016: That did clarify a few things.
You husband CAN slowly wean the girl off seeing him, but is it fair to the girl? Just because her mom is a twat? You know what I mean?
And yes, the MOTHER of the girl needs to be the one telling HER daughter. An... (read in full...)
How do I raise this issue with my husband? So that my husband will raise the issue with the girl's mother?
Q. Hi, id just like some advice regarding children as no matter what choice i make i fear im going to upset someone. my husband and i have a son. My husband also still sees his step daughter from his relationship before me. He sees her two Saturday...
A. 6 October 2016: Sorry, it's not your business to tell her he isn't her Dad.
Why are your only options to LIE to your son or TELL the girl the "truth"? Why not simply tell your son that "Anna" is Daddy's daughter whom he sees every other Saturday?
What do... (read in full...)
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