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This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 March 2009: I've realised something which has taken me around 18 years to figure out...I'm writing this article as theremay be some people out there who still haven't figured this out! 'Life is too short' is the best expression ever, it can help you to make des...
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I found spot of blood..did I rip my hymen?
Q. i fingered myself and i saw a tad of blood on my fingers my period is due soon but i dont know weather i have ripped my mymen or its just period blood please answer if you have any ideas. if i have it has fot its ups and downs but......
A. 9 March 2009: And you can book a doctors appointment and they won't tell your mum and dad as everything is confidential! You can get the number of ur doctors by phoning 118 118 and telling them the street name of the surgery and the area that you live in! X... (read in full...)
I found spot of blood..did I rip my hymen?
Q. i fingered myself and i saw a tad of blood on my fingers my period is due soon but i dont know weather i have ripped my mymen or its just period blood please answer if you have any ideas. if i have it has fot its ups and downs but......
A. 9 March 2009: It could be both, if you have any problems then go and see a doctor! If you are ok then you shouldn't worry! X... (read in full...)
How can I show him I've changed and won't nag? How much time and space do I give him?
Q. My boyfriend left me because we had issues with my nagging instead of respeting his decision i cryed and made a whole lot of drama for 2 weeks. he got very angry, later he got better and said we should start as friends, we had sex and he said he ...
A. 9 March 2009: To stop nagging I have a system. If my boyfriend does something an I feel like I am going to nag I stop and speak calmy. I tell him what he has done to affect me, how I feel about it and what I need from him and then what action he can take. For ... (read in full...)
Sex Starved Husband needs help....
Q. I have been married 25 years to my childhood sweetheart, the past five years things are going down hill, my drive for sex is great hers is almost gone, what am I to do, she gets all mad if I look at porn or pictures, yet when I ask for it from her ...
A. 9 March 2009: Just ease off any pressure. If she feels pressured then she is likely to stop having sex even if she wanted to. Try masturbating in private!! Don't let her know as she may feel inadequet. Give her lots of compliments and make her feel wanted but ... (read in full...)
Road trip, bereavement and cancer advice wanted
Q. Dear Cupids, At last my question for you all :D. Very soon i am of to America on holiday with my friend and his wife. We are going to be road tripping around LA – Phoenix – Flagstaff – Vegas areas. However, it isn’t just a holiday, there a...
A. 8 March 2009: You could look cancer up on google and then see what the cousin Is experiencing, that way you will have a better idea of what she is going through. You say your friend is likely to clam up and this will be what to expect, you can't expect a massive ... (read in full...)
"things going too fast & too heavy"
Q. hi met someone and we went out. everything was going well said he would take me out last night for a meal etc. Been in touch during week and he was talking bout coming to my sisters wedding etc. Lost my phone on sat night and my mate texted him to ...
A. 8 March 2009: He's messing with you and you seem like your messing him around abit too! Just leave him alone and let him sort himself out for the time being! Move along and find someone who is not going to be an idiot, and someone who is not going to play ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend beats the hell out of me
Q. My boyfriend beats the hell out of me when I get him upset (he says I'm "getting fly.") He choked me when I was 8 months pregnant (outside), and he beat me up in front of our 2 daughters and my lil sister. I have been kicked, punched, slapped, head ...
A. 8 March 2009: You need to leave him! He'll be the death of you! Its not just you that you need to do this for! You have children andyou need to protect them, I know its hard as you love him but if he really loved you then he wouldn't be doing this! You can get ... (read in full...)
He asked what I would do if I found out he cheated on me. Should I worry?
Q. hi=-) just 1 day ago my boyfirend asked me what would i do if i were to find out he was cheating on me this really confused me alot becuase hes always saying how much he loves me and that im the only girl for him. but then why would he ask me this ...
A. 8 March 2009: Signs of cheating- he'll be distant from you and act differently about you.
He will not leave his phone in the room or he'll put passwords on it!
He won't let you read his emails
His sex drive will change, he'll either want it loads more or a lo... (read in full...)
Do I believe him? Or his friends?
Q. First off, Sorry it's so long! My boyfriend and I have been dating since October 2008. I love him, I Honestly do and I know he loves me. We haven't had sex yet but we have done other things like he's fingered me, and stuff like that. Well, toda...
A. 8 March 2009: I wouldn't trust him! Boys will be boys and they will brag to their friends and sometimes lie to make themselves look cool! I wouldn't trust him for a while as he could have said these things! I suppose,on the other hand , that they could have been ... (read in full...)
I desperately want more of a life!
Q. Aaah, help! I am having a relationship with a man who has two teenage boys. We don't live together. That was my choice as I don't wish to lose my independence but I suffer from anxiety. My partner can be pretty lazy. He doesn't work at the mome...
A. 8 March 2009: Some harsh words need to be said! He needs to stop being so lazy and he needs to take care of HIS kids! You are doing everything you can but you need to have a stern conversation with him! He sounds like an idiot! X... (read in full...)
I think my teacher wants to have sex with me!
Q. I'm so confused. I posted a question on here a year ago about being in love with my teacher. I came to realize I was trippin. I have her again this year and I don't think I'm in love with her again lol but I am lusting over her. I don't want a ...
A. 8 March 2009:
I would not take action in this situation, it does sound like somethings going on but she could get sacked if she has anything to do with you sexually! Please don't risk her job, why don't you wait until you have finished school and then appr... (read in full...)
I don't want to be fingered!
Q. Okay... Right so ive started seeing this boy in year nine and im in year eight... We were talking and i realise that the boys in his year have fingered girls. I dont want to be fingered and i told him that but i dont know if he expects me to let ...
A. 8 March 2009: I would say no if you don't feel ready,he will understand if he is a nice lad. When you are ready then you will know and you'll feel comfortable! For now enjoy hugging and kissing, there is no rush at all, don't give in to peer pressure!x ... (read in full...)
Should I go over and visit him in Sweden at all?
Q. Dear Cupid, 2 years ago I went out with a wonderful man for over a month. I ended it because he always was asking when the relationship was going to become a sexual one and so I felt that maybe this was all he was after. Also I felt things were...
A. 7 March 2009: It may be that he still likes you, he may not actually have a girlfriend, he may have said that to make you feel secure. X
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Should I go over and visit him in Sweden at all?
Q. Dear Cupid, 2 years ago I went out with a wonderful man for over a month. I ended it because he always was asking when the relationship was going to become a sexual one and so I felt that maybe this was all he was after. Also I felt things were...
A. 7 March 2009: I don't think that going to sweden is a good idea! Old feelings be re ignited and start off all sorts of problems! Don't go!! Move on! Xx
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Why did she send that text? And what should I do with my ex when I see her? Confused!
Q. So my girlfriend dumped me after about a year of dating she started to tell me she still had feelings for me but just did not want a boyfriend...even I love you etc...I'm still so in love with her, perhaps more now because I lost her. After a few ...
A. 6 March 2009: Stay away as she is messing with your head! Don't read her msgs or answer her calls! She needs to resolve any issues by herself before giving you mixed msgs! Get over her, you'll become a stronger person without any contact with her! X... (read in full...)
How do you make sex beautiful for both of you?
Q. Ladies what do you do to make sure you are satisfied during sex? What do you do to satisfy your man during sex? What do you do to make sex beautiful for you both? ...
A. 6 March 2009: We take it in turns doing what each other likes, then when we are having sex there is always a lot of communication going on, so we know when we are pleasing each other and what we are feeling. X... (read in full...)
We both agreed we could see other people but now I feel guilty!
Q. Hi, So I am seeing this guy I'll call him C, I really like him a lot, and its mutual. We don't want a relationship, for me its because I am scared of commitment and I'm just not ready. For him I think he is just trying to sort out what he wants to...
A. 6 March 2009: You're not officailly dating so you have done nothing wrong and there is no need to tell him as it may ruin what you have. X
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He's been talking to another woman. What do we do?
Q. I am 56 air hostess divorced living with my man 46 for two years we have not made love he says he loves me and that i am his best friend then i found his mobile phone bill a number on it was used alot late at night and when i was away ...
A. 6 March 2009: The key to any relationship is conversation and communication with each other he's wrong to talk about you to another woman! You can accept this! Sit him down and tell him why you don't have sex and how je makes you feel, he will se things a lot ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend talks to her ex on a daily basis! Should I be concerned?
Q. I have never been the jealous type but iI am getting concerned with my girlfreind who, talks with her ex husband on a daily basis, she says that they want eo remain friends, but to remain friends do they really have to talk with each other everyday? ...
A. 6 March 2009: Talk to her, tell her you don't mind them staying in touch as friends but you don't see the need in them speaking every day. X
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Confused as to when, I got pregnant, and who the father of the child would be based on the specific times, I was with the two men, please help?
Q. i was 18 weeks on july 10 would i have gotten pregnant before march 23?i was only with a guy on february 18 and another guy on march 23 and confused when i would of got pregnant....
A. 6 March 2009: Paternity test is need as no body can be sure here! Sperm can live inside you for up to seven days s it could have been the first one, or you could have become pregnant straight after sex with the second one! X... (read in full...)
Is it okay we're dating and we're third cousins?
Q. I'm curretnly living with and dating my third cousin. A lot of people seem to be against it, I even think he double guesses it sometimes, what should I do?...
A. 6 March 2009: Check laws in your area and make sure its not illegal. People see this weird as soon as you mention you are related s keep it to yourself or don't do it! X... (read in full...)
Is it wrong in wanting to be actress and following your dreams?
Q. Is it wrong in wanting to be actress and following your dreams? Why do people put the glamour world down? If you work hard in life and you have the hot looks and the acting talent and the right attitude we can achieve what we want right...? Then ...
A. 6 March 2009: Acting can be unstable and so your parents just want to know that you'll be secure in the future! Follow your dreams but make sure you have a back up plan incase you find yourself at a dead end! Good luck! X... (read in full...)
Relationship worth saving! Just need advice to send us in the right direction
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. He has a 4 year old daughter. We had a rocky start that involved getting together, breaking up, moving in together, him moving out and then finally us moving back in together. We have a great lif...
A. 6 March 2009: You can make this work!
You really do need counselling, this way an outsider can help you both communicate effectivly and resolve problems. Talk to each other and tell him how you feel! X... (read in full...)
I've started thinking about my ex who cheated - but I've never really got over him. I don't know what to do.
Q. Ok about three years ago my boyfriend of about 3mos cheated on me with a girl who was younger than me (i was in college she was in high school!!! a junior!!)and not to be concieted but she was not pretty and chubby ( now i normally wouldn't call ...
A. 6 March 2009: I think there may be problems in your current relationship if you are thinking about your ex, you have to stay away from him! A leopard never changes its spots! X... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's strange off and on behavior is distrubing to me, what can I do about it?
Q. I'm in lovew with this guy, i'm pretty sure he doenst like me and i don't know if i can cope any more, last week we went camping and the whole week we were pretty much together constaantly and we had a great time, lots of laughter and flirting...
A. 6 March 2009: Life is too short to be depressed and cry over small things so think about the bigger picture! What have you got to be thankful for? I bet there's a lot when you think about it carefully!!! So take time out and even practise meditation (clearing ... (read in full...)
I don't trust my ex when he says he wants to be friends. Do I mention this to him?
Q. Recently my younger brothers have taken up extra curriculars that I once was involved in during my youth; which is not the problem. As they are involved in the same circles that I once was they often come upon people from my past; most recently a ...
A. 6 March 2009: You are right not to want any contact with him, don't worry about his relationship with your siblings, I'm sure that will be fine as long as you don't talk to him much, just stay civil with him but do not start conversation. X... (read in full...)
Why does he back off? I'm so confused....could it be because he's depressed?
Q. Around 6 weeks ago i was seeing bloke from work for a short time but he had some problems and said he really liked me but felt he would let me down as he has slight depression and has good and bad days and is still getting over his ex. Anyway we ...
A. 6 March 2009: Keep this relationship at platonic! He needs to sort out himself before entering a relationship! X... (read in full...)
I fooled around with a friend of my ex fiancé who is still my boyfriend. Now I don't know whether to tell him.
Q. I was out with a friend of mine last night. While we were at the bar I bumped into an acquaintance of my ex-fiancee. We started to talk about my relationship with my ex and why I cheated on him. I cheated on him with one of his co-workers, I ...
A. 6 March 2009: Why did you do this? Are you having problems with your relationship? If you are then you need to work them out before cheating again, either be in or out of the relationship. Make your mind up, don't be s selfish and disrespectful! X
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After we've told each other secrets, I don't hear from him for a few days. It confuses me. Why does he do it?
Q. Hey. Ok, well Im 15 and my problem is with a boy, who is 17. Me and this boy, lets call him "Lee" get on really, really well and we always have done. We have a real laugh, can trust each other 100% and just like being around each other. We do flirt ...
A. 6 March 2009: He sounds immature, you need to leave him alone until he grows up! If he's cold with you then just leave him too it! Don't share secrets with him, he seems untrustworthy! X... (read in full...)
Mixed Signals: Does he just want to be friends?
Q. Im so confused about this guy's behaviour. Can someone explain it to me? This guy who im good friends with (and used to like me) is sending me mixed signals. I know he wants to be friends and I also know he's the type of guy who jumps from girl ...
A. 6 March 2009: I always say that if someone doesn't talk to you and tell you they like you and ask you out then they don't like you! Until he can show you he likes you leave him alone....simple! X... (read in full...)
Is my Assistant taking advantage in our work-place affair?
Q. I am a manager and have been having an affair with one of my Assistants for the last 2 years. In my position I do get approached by a fair number of young female workers who are obviously looking for advantage (promotion). However, the worker in ...
A. 6 March 2009: Why did you have an affair anyway? Are you married? Best thing to do is talk to her to resolve the situation, tell her that work and private life are seperate and that if she would like to be moved to a different department then you will arrange it ... (read in full...)
He's like a chav, but he's also like a real gentleman, and I really like him. I don't know what to do.
Q. Well this is a big story sort of lol. Well i am 13. I like this boy who is in year 9. He has been out with girls my year but i really like him. He is like a chav but is also like a real gentleman. I really like him and i think about him everyday...
A. 6 March 2009: I refuse to believe that a chav can be a gent! Leave him alone!! Get someone better! X... (read in full...)
My boyfriend can't orgasm. He used to be fine, but not now. What could be the reason?
Q. hi, well me and my boyfriend have been together for a while now, and we have great sex. there has never been a problem with him being able to cum. but now out of nowwhere the last two times we have had sex, he has not been able to cum. not even when ...
A. 6 March 2009: A weird situation! He may be having a few problems that he may not feel as if he can share with you. Just keep talking, communication is the key to this! ! ! If he still can't do it after you have talked then he could have a problem which needs a ... (read in full...)
He wanted to leave as friends, but later decided he wanted to give this LDR a try; 5 days later, no words from him!?
Q. I have known this man (he's 28), been friends for 3 years. About a year ago he went through a divorce and a couple months later began flirting with me. I didn't play back. He got excepted into this program (he's military), so I thought that we ...
A. 6 March 2009: He may be really busy with his lifestyle, he's adjusting to it and needs to work out a time slot to contact you. Msg him and tell him that you are concerned about this, tell him that for a ldr to work you need a lot of contact! X... (read in full...)
Did I miss out on the opportunity for sex? How can I bring this chance again?
Q. The other day my neighbor asked if I could help her select an outfit for a business evening dinner she was going to. After talking in her living room she called me back to her walk-in closet in her bedroom. I should say that I think that she is ...
A. 6 March 2009: Simply ask her if she needs any help in the future? Recreate the situation and take the chance when it arises! Or invite her over to 'help you choose something to wear' x... (read in full...)
I don't want to be reponsible for my sister in law's brother, how do I explain this to my family?
Q. My brother is married to this girl name Meghan. Her parents and my parents have also gotten close. My parents and her parents being close is a good thing since my brother and her are married. Well my parents don't understand that Meghan's little ...
A. 6 March 2009: Just explain to them how you have explained in this problem, tell them evrything that you have put on this site. I'm sure they will understand. X
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Am I still at risk of getting pregnant? Someone told me that it's low risk if I'm at the end of my pack of pills.
Q. I need advice here... I'm on Diane35 contraceptive pill, and I'm married. Thursday night, Friday morning I got the stomach flu, and I figured "contraception failure", but I had no symptoms or proof, other than being violently ill. I was bett...
A. 6 March 2009: Best to take the morning after pill if you are unsure, see a pharmacist or doctor! X... (read in full...)
How can I bring his interest back again?
Q. im 16 n m boyfrnd is 17..we bth love each other n has a very gud understnind we hav been in relationshp snce 5 mnths..in starting he gve a lots of importnce bt nw its getting reduce..m worried abt it...i knw he dosnt hav dat much time n manges to ...
A. 6 March 2009: You can't make someone like you. Keep cool, reduce your interest and he may increase his when he sees that you have a life beyond him. You can't be too needy so relax. And if his interest reduces more and more then let him go, you can find someone ... (read in full...)
I adore my step daughter but her sisters with whom I have had seldom contact are very disrespectful so I can hardly tolerate their visits!
Q. I have a step daughter of whom I love an adore. She is 10 years old and I have been in her life since she was 3. She visits her father and I on weekends or anytime she wishes. She has 3 sisters from her mother and step father. My problem is 2 of the ...
A. 6 March 2009: You need to have a family meeting, prior to this draw up a list of house rules and during the meeting tell everyone the rules and explain anything they aren't clear on. Answer any questions they may have and tell them that if they do not obey the ... (read in full...)
How does a teenage guy act when he knows that the girl he likes likes him a lot as well?
Q. How does a teenage guy act when he knows that the girl he likes likes him a lot as well? What could his attitude be towards her? If he ignores or avoids her, but he sometimes smiles sweetly at her when he sees her, what does it mean? please ...
A. 6 March 2009: Teenage boys are all immature and they all act differently. If he is mature about this situation then he would talk to the girl about it, he shouldn't ignore her or anything negative. X... (read in full...)
Do women, once they reach 40 become less interested in their partners and is there something more I can do to help her get her mojo back?
Q. Hi, I have been with my wife for 20 years. We have been in and out of the ruts over time and each time climbing out has taught us somEthing new about ourselves and each other. My wife turned 40 a while ago and now she has no intrest in me sexually. ...
A. 6 March 2009: This may be down to hormones. Its not that she feels any less towards you but maybe she is worried that at her age she may not be able to lubricate herslef naturally in order to have sex. Try talking to her and see if there is any thing wrong, there ... (read in full...)
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