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... Send *ayney Y a private message | | | *ayney Y's profile:I originally spied this site when I was looking for an answer on a personal question about something weird that happened to me, and subsequently became engrossed in other people's 'issues'. I love talking to people about the basics of life....family, romance, and emotional attachments, because that's pretty much all life is about. We all have hobbies, passions, etc, but it's the emotional stuff that makes us all tick along. I like connecting with other people on that level. Sometimes a complete stranger is the best person to talk to. |
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Is it only false hope, or is there really someone out there for everyone?
Q. ok alot of people say hold out there is somebody out there for everybody.. which is cliche to me. cuz wen i read alot of the post on this website even people of older age have complicated relationships and in real life alot of people go thru lives ...
A. 29 November 2009: It's defintely a cliche, propaganda put about by people who believe that finding a life-partner and breeding are rites of passage necessary to personal fulfilment. You're very young, so chill out and don't panic, and if you're still single by age ... (read in full...)
What can I do to make our 1 year of dating annivesary special?
Q. Ok, so i really need some help. My 1 year anniversary is coming up in about 2 months, and i need ideas on something special to do for my girlfriend. My friend had this pretty cool idea, it was with those airplanes and they wrote in the ...
A. 29 November 2009: Obviously you've got $ to spend so..... how about telling her to put her best party dress on and then surprising her by turning up at her house in a hired limo to take you to the place where you first hooked up, and organise a restaurant meal, (or a ... (read in full...)
I had an affair with a womanizer then gave his wife my email and password to show her the proof
Q. Hello, This is just a follow up of what I have written earlier. I got involved with a 68 yrs old man thru internet online and he is married. He is a womanizer, but still I loved him and even learned to love his imperfections. Up front I told him...
A. 29 November 2009: Simple answer, it not your fault. Being hurt and angry, and feeling vengeful, is a normal reaction when you find out you've been used and misled. He's the one who should be apologising - to his wife and to you. If his wife has any self respect ... (read in full...)
His "joke" was NOT funny!
Q. My husband jokingly said, "I love this woman... Jennifer", she is always so satisfied with my work... I totally lost it. I felt it was an insult. And he said, oh no it was just a joke, I was just making a funny joke.. Do you think is this really f...
A. 28 November 2009: I think you're not feeling very attractive because of your marital issues and so you're over-reacting, maybe jealous of any positive attention he gives to another female, (even if she's not in the room), because he doesn't give enough to you, which ... (read in full...)
Cheated and fell in love..what now?
Q. Here's my predicament... I've been married 17 years, contently, i would say, but not always happily. I love my wife but am not in love. we have two children (14 and 7). Two years ago, I started an affair with a co-worker. She and I each seemed to ...
A. 27 November 2009: Ending a marriage to be with someone you love doesn't have to mean abandoning your kids. As long as you always maintain your relationship with them, and shoulder your finacial responsibilities to them, you haven't abandoned them. It's your current ... (read in full...)
In love with an actor and it is affecting my real life relationship??
Q. okay, so i am in love with an actor, ryan reynolds. the guy from the proposal, okay? its getting in the way of mine and my boyfriend's relationship. but ryan is so so so so so so so so hot. i have a poster of him in my room. and look at videos of ...
A. 27 November 2009: Sorry, but this has to be said.....SLAP YOURSELF NOW! I'm surprised your boyfriend hasn't dumped you and found himself someone who can tell the difference between fantasy and reality. Celebrity worship is dumb. I know a lot of people do it, but ... (read in full...)
He held me tight all last night and he said he loves me more than anything, but now I am in fear of him leaving...
Q. My boyfriend has Huge trust issues but i trust him completely, he is a very honourable, loving man. he has a bit of a reason though, as i had taken anti-depressents and didn't tell him about it because he was always telling me that i'm such a downer ...
A. 27 November 2009: Taking medication isn't a crime. You're an adult, and if you need medical help it's no one's business but yours and the doctor who prescibes it for you. But you know what....I wouldn't be surprised if hanging around with morons like your boyfriend ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend physically and mentally drains me... I'm so unhappy...
Q. Hello to everyone that responds to my question. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years. The relationship started out ok, and its been alright since. I enjoy his company sometimes, but half of the time he mentally exhausts me. Once upon a t...
A. 26 November 2009: And you are still with this pea-brain because........?... (read in full...)
My ex-boyfriend faces prison for what he did, should I continue case against him?
Q. I stupidly met up with an obsessed ex boyfriend reasons I do not know nor can explain. We met up and returned home to his house by taxi around 11.30. On entry into the house I went to the toilet. During this time he had taken my mobile and proce...
A. 26 November 2009: DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT, let this dirtbag get away with what he did to you. You have to follow through and see him dealt with by the law for two huge reasons. One is that if you let him get away with it, it will affect you in the long run, in the ... (read in full...)
My husband has developed feelings for another woman and I don't know how to handle it...
Q. me and my husband have been married for 3 and 1/2 years and recently he realized that he has feelings for another woman. I'm in a battle for him with her. My friends tell me to go but my heart tells me to stay cuz he will pick me, what do u think I ...
A. 26 November 2009: Well, you're being very mature about it, and at least he has been honest with you, so that's a good start to fixing things. I think you should tell him he has to make a decision about where he wants to be, and explain that if he chooses the other ... (read in full...)
My wife has no sex drive but loves me very much. I don't want to cheat but what can I do?
Q. I am bored with my wife. She has no sex drive and I don't know how to get her going. Every other part of our marriage is great. We get along great, in fact, we love each other very much. Everyone says how lucky we are to have each other but if they ...
A. 25 November 2009: Stop letting this woman manipulate you. If she has psychological problems that prevent her from enjoying sex, how did she manage to get pregnant? I don't know about the religious upbringing stuff, it sounds more like a case of "now I have the baby ... (read in full...)
My wife says that some of the texts were to the wife, not just this married man! Should I verify that with the wife?
Q. I've been married 22 yrs. and everything seemed perfect. About a week ago i checked my cell phn bill and saw text msgng charges. I checked the bill and figured i would need to cal cell phn company and have another argument. when i looked at the ...
A. 25 November 2009: I wouldn't warn her in advance, I'd just go ahead and ask the wife of the guy. Do it sneakily though. You say you don't want to socialise with this guy and his wife any longer, but I would, just so you can get the opportunity to jokingly raise the ... (read in full...)
My sister sent him naked photos, how do I get over this and him?
Q. A year ago my bf lied about being home one evening. Something told me he was lying I went to his apartment stood in the middle of it and called him. I asked what we was doing he said cleaning his apartment. Needless to say I got back with him. I ...
A. 25 November 2009: He's a dickhead. Why do you want to be with someone who not only lies, but can't even do it well? Your sister is a skank too, you should get those photo's and blow them up and paste them on lamp posts up and down her street. ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with his infidelity that resulted in a baby? I can't stand the pain.
Q. I have been in a relationship for 3 years. I recently moved in a year ago with my 2 daughters. During one of our break ups he had sex with a so called friend, results a one year old son. Even though i tried to hang in their it was very hard. I ...
A. 24 November 2009: Best to let it go and move on. He has poisoned your life by screwing around, (OK, so you were having a break up, but if he was at all upset about it he wouldn't have been porking the first woman willing to open her legs, especially one stupid enough ... (read in full...)
I'm Falling for a Married man, "my boyfriend"...I Need Some Advice.(affair)
Q. Im Falling for a Married Man,were having an affair. Ive allowed him to consider me as his girlfriend, and hes my "boyfriend" Ok, I will tell you all the informantion i think you need to know to understand what im going through, from beginning t...
A. 23 November 2009: He's using you, and he treats his wife like crap. For goodness sake get rid of this asshole and find yourself someone decent. ... (read in full...)
Is it inappropiate for my b/f to brag on facebook about previous girls he's hooked up with?
Q. My bf and I broke up and he went on an overseas holiday with some of his friends. When he got back he told me he regretted the break up and realised what he wanted in life- me. He said he missed me so much and didnt want anyone else but me and bla ...
A. 22 November 2009: No, you're not over-reacting, it's downright juvenile behaviour, and also dismissive and disrespectful towards you. Aside from that, what have they got to brag about really? Sounds like they were playing Pass The Parcel and she was the parcel. Not ... (read in full...)
How to support someone I care about who is going through a divorce?
Q. How do I play this? My boyfriend has broken up with me. He is in the process of divorcing his previous partner and has discovered in our relationship that he has not moved forward emotionally as much as he though he had - he keeps worrying that our ...
A. 20 November 2009: Hi,
Even if a marriage has been bad people going through a divorce have a lot of negative emotional stuff, (anger, shock, regret, despair, etc), to deal with, and he's doing the fair thing by being so honest about his feelings, (which means he must... (read in full...)
Why is she always so mean to me?
Q. I just started seventh grade, and some mean girls have started making fun of me. One of the girls lives by me so its really embarrassing. She's started telling people I'm a lesbian. She's also saying she's scared and that I ask her a lot of ...
A. 20 November 2009: Sheesh! With all the stuff in the media about bullying these days you'd think these clowns would try to get a grip on themselves.
So you've ateempted to be friendly and been met with nastiness. That's her problem, not yours. If you get a chance to b... (read in full...)
Opinions needed - should I be concerned about my husband's female colleague?
Q. Looking for opinions. Happened a few years ago. Female coworker called our home with sexual joke to my husband. She also confided to him thought she was pregnant with another married mans child. Also, calling his cell phone to find out when he ...
A. 19 November 2009: I'm a little confused as to whether you think this is still happening or it's something that happened a long time ago but you can't forget about it. My question would be; why was she confiding something as serious as being pregnant with a married ... (read in full...)
My husband just never wants to sort things out!! He expects me to be fine.
Q. I need some advice here. I've been married for just over 2 years now. My husband is a wonderful man who's totally commited, faithful, caring and hard working. But...if we have an arguement, he doesn't like to talk about it afterwards. Now I'm a...
A. 18 November 2009: He doesn't want to go to counselling because he knows the counsellor will pull him up for his behaviour because he's diminishing your feelings and your sense of self-worth by telling you "it's all in your head". You can't win with someone like that. ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to be unhappy with my girlfriend performing Burlesque shows?
Q. hi recenty my girlfriend started doing burlesque shows. i think it's just a way for her to get on stage and strip to her under wear and talk dirty with a room full of strangers. is it wrong that i don't like it, i haven't told her out right ca...
A. 18 November 2009: If it makes you uncomfortable, having a burlesque stripper as a girlfriend isn't for you. No woman who works in the sex industry is incapable of having a different line of work, no matter what they say. They just, (usually), can't get a job that ... (read in full...)
I've got a boyfriend now so how can I stop this urge?
Q. I'm 18 and i have a problem and i need help. well in the past i had this one guy that i gave blow jobs to and now that im in a relationship i have nothing else to give because i love the person im with. so one day they asked me to come over but i ...
A. 18 November 2009: Is this post even for real?
Of course he got angry. Not too many women are stupid enough to go 'round giving free blowjobs to any bloke whenever they demand it.
For goodness sake get a grain of self-respect. ... (read in full...)
Am I over reacting if my boyfriend has a wedding on the day of my birthday and I do not want to attend?
Q. Am I over reacting if my boyfriend has a wedding on the day of my birthday and I do not want to attend? I am not close with the couple that is getting married and my birthday is the only day out of the year that it is all about me. He gives me a ...
A. 16 November 2009: I'm sure you can't be half as self-centred and self-obsessed as your question makes you sound. Obviously your boyfriend wants to attend the wedding, more than he cares about your birthday. Which isn't surprising, as they will only get married once, ... (read in full...)
He's still living in the same house as his wife and it's causing major problems...
Q. I am seeing a guy who i met 3 months ago. He is still living in the same house as his wife, they are getting divorced, she refuses to put the house up for sale. He says he hates her and yet he allows her to spend his money, go out for meals with her...
A. 14 November 2009: Assuming that he's telling you the truth about his marital situation, it's probably best to butt out of his finances. If you've only been seeing each other for three months then nagging him about his personal financial arrangements only makes you ... (read in full...)
Should I Allow My Boyfriend to Swing?
Q. I've been in a wonderful relationship with my bf for 16 yrs. People remark how close we are, how loving we are to each other. We do everything together including our work. We have a great sex life and family life. He's always there for me and ...
A. 11 November 2009: 1. He is potentially exposing you to STD's, (craigslist for Gods sake? Eeewww!).
2. He is a liar.
3. Your feelings obviously don't mean very much to him.
4. He must have been misleading the mistress if she thought he was going to leave you. ... (read in full...)
How can I overcome irritation when she doesn't call as promised?
Q. Women not returning calls. I would like some advice on what do when a lady promises to call even though she knows she won't call. I have a friend who is a girl. Whenever she has an academic need she bombards my phone with calls. In fact one day ...
A. 5 November 2009: I think the message is that she's not really interested. But, if she ever sleeps with you one night when she's drunk, say you'll call her tomorrow. Then just don't. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's wife has cancer. I love him, but want what is best for everyone.
Q. I am a 37 year old single mum to a four year old. I began an affair with a man 25 years my senior, (someone i have known for 15 years) around six months ago. prior to this I had been alone since the first trimester of pregnancy. Having a child, a...
A. 5 November 2009: I think being faced with losing his wife has given him a reality jolt. Without discounting your personal history of abuse, that's not an excuse for doing something to another person that you wouldn't like having done to you. Nor is it OK "for two ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is jealous of my best friend
Q. Me and my boyfriend have always gotten along and have a close bond but theres always been somthing that pisses me off. He's jealous of my best friend who is male and also an ex of mine. I've explained so many times that there's nothing going on and ...
A. 4 November 2009: So who ended the relationship between you and your ex/now best friend? I'll take a stab in the dark and guess it was you. And that's why your boyfriend is annoyed by it, because he can see that your ex is still keen on you,(whether the ex admits it ... (read in full...)
I am tired of this woman texting my husband with her problems!
Q. my husband continues to be friends with a woman that i don't approve of. i told him several times that she wants more than that,but he says i'm just jealous. everytime she has drama in her life she text him at least 15 to 20 times and believe me is ...
A. 4 November 2009: She's not the problem, he is. Trust me, people don't usually do that sort of thing unless they're being encouraged. He's getting his ego stroked twice, through her attention and by making you jealous. If you were to approve of this woman and be ... (read in full...)
What do you think of a man, who...?
Q. What do you think about a man whom, you leave a phone message in the morning asking if he wants to have dinner and at 8:30pm he calls, leaves a message that does not mention the call, you try to call back and know he is there because he is on ...
A. 4 November 2009: Oh, flick this loser! He wants to be exclusive but is on Plenty Of Fish, and he's only there to "talk"? That should tell you all you need to know, never mind about the fact that he ignores your efforts to comunicate whilst he is obviously chatting ... (read in full...)
Am I just a fool in love? Why is my wife ignoring me?
Q. Im starting to wonder if my wife is still in love with me or not. I constantly feel like she is disrespecting me and is simply with me for convienience. Out latest argument was on Halloween when at the bar with her and friends, I would order a dr...
A. 3 November 2009: Definitely a fool in love. She sounds like a pig in lipstick, and why men actually marry these women is a centuries-old mystery. Confiding your personal matters to anyone, let alone a bar full of people, is very uncool, and she needs to grow up and ... (read in full...)
How can I resist the urge to cheat again?
Q. I really need some help Im a married wowman and have cheated even had an affair. It is not my personality to mess around. I have to admit I do miss the rush I used to get. It was always exciting to me to meet someone new. I feel guilty for feeling ...
A. 2 November 2009: I'll apologise now because I'm going to be a bit rough. You are NOT "happily married". If your husband knew what you were really like, I can assure you things at home wouldn't be too happy at all, unless he is the sort of guy who desn't mind his ... (read in full...)
I'm worried my ex will tell everyone I'm bisexual!
Q. I'm bisexual male that was in a gay relationship after my wife divorce me. I'm 60 and my lover is 20 years younger. We had our up and down just like most relationship. Recently, I bump into an old girl friend of mine in high school. We falling for ...
A. 30 October 2009: Do people of Western culture really care about bi-sexuality or homosexuality that much these days? I'd call his bluff and point out that if he really cared about you he'd be happy for you, and if he valued your friendship he wouldn't stoop so low as ... (read in full...)
I'm not "in love" with my girlfriend, and she's kind of crazy. I'm scared to break up with her, what do I do?
Q. I have been dating my girlfriend for a year and a half now and I've realized that I'm not "IN" love with her ....we get along great sometimes but most of the time it's real bad fighting and its REAL bad if we've be drinking.... she starts hitting me ...
A. 30 October 2009: So she assaults you but you still think she's beautiful? I'm confused. That's called being a bully, and bullies are ugly no matter what they look like on the outside. You aren't helping her with her,(obvious), emotional problems by taking her crap, ... (read in full...)
My husband lies all the time. How do I tell him it's over?
Q. Hi you all! maybe some one can help me.I have talked to family and friends about my husband and no one can help me.I just realy need to talk to some one.Well here it is my husband lies to me realy bad.In a mouth I have to tell him good bye.This ...
A. 29 October 2009: Dealing with a liar can start to send you crazy after a while, especially if they're of the pathological variety and actually believe their own crap. I'd just tell him straight that you've had enough of being taken for a fool. Good luck... (read in full...)
I'm married and in love with a younger co-worker. What should I do?
Q. Hi All, I'm a 30yr old Married man for 1 year now, but have been in the current relationship for 10 years. After a very long engagement we finally got married, not because we didn't want to, it was just a money thing. We have 2 kids. One form ...
A. 29 October 2009: Jesus, some of the posters here need to wake up and read the question properly! The guy is bored senseless in his marriage, and it's been like that for 9 years, (out of 10!). Doesn't that tell you something? He drinks too much, is in counselling, ... (read in full...)
I'm married and in love with a younger co-worker. What should I do?
Q. Hi All, I'm a 30yr old Married man for 1 year now, but have been in the current relationship for 10 years. After a very long engagement we finally got married, not because we didn't want to, it was just a money thing. We have 2 kids. One form ...
A. 28 October 2009: You're discontented with your marriage, and Penny is a symptom, not a cause. Not spending a lot of time with your wife is another symptom. I think married people have an obligation to tell their partner when their feelings have changed,(and I know ... (read in full...)
Did he appreciate my honesty and my regard for his health?
Q. This is a question for men, but ladies feel free to answer too especially if you had a similar experience. How would you guys react to a woman you previously dated/ seeing casually informing you after a month or so of breaking up/ parting ways (es...
A. 28 October 2009: Hmm, my guess would be that you probably caught it off of him if he wasn't too concerned by it. Most people would react by being surprised at least, and being grateful that you told them if they were certain that they never had it before they were ... (read in full...)
Now I am single my married friends have cooled on me!
Q. I am in my forties and have gone through a divorce. I have female friends both married and single. Since I am newly single some of my married friends have cooled on me. Not sure why. Any thoughts?...
A. 28 October 2009: As far as I've ever noticed, divorced men don't get ostracised, but divorced women do. Why? Because women are jealous and possessive creatures by nature, and married women who once saw you as a friend and ally now perceive you as a threat. You will ... (read in full...)
If he shouts abuse at me, I see red and lash out! Help!
Q. me and my partner argue alot over stupid things like eg house work and animals etc i love him to bits but if he shouts abusive words at me i see red and lash out please please help me before it gets serously out of hand i am scared ive got ...
A. 28 October 2009: Easy answer. Get out of the sick relationship with the man who "shouts abuse at you". When people 'love each other to bits', they don't treat each other like rubbish. You don't 'love' each other at all, you are both just caught up in a co-dependency ... (read in full...)
What should I say when I write him?
Q. Hey there we broke up 3 month ago ,, i cant get over him , he already did i moved in my life , but i still love him and keep thinking of him any way i have a lot of spams on my e-mail and i receive a lot of junk mail ,, so he got e-mail fr...
A. 28 October 2009: I'd just not answer, unless you want to rekindle the freindship and you're happy to be just friends. :) ... (read in full...)
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