A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:This is a question for men, but ladies feel free to answer too especially if you had a similar experience.How would you guys react to a woman you previously dated/ seeing casually informing you after a month or so of breaking up/ parting ways (especially if it was not an official serious relationship) that they recently tested positive for a curable std - gonorrhea.This of course happened to me and the guy I was seeing. He was, I guess "cordial" "nonchalant" about it when I told him and he said he just got tested too and was clean. We both were monogamous while we were seeing each other, I know I was. But when I told him about it, he said that he had to tell his ex GF about it because it raises some issues they had before breaking up. Which leads me to believe that maybe he thought she may have passed on something to him and passed it on to me. But given that this type of std shows symptoms in men 90% of the time, it may be unlikely unless he took some antibiotics for a different sickness and it cured him of that std too.I really like him, and it was unfortunate that towards the end of our involvement this issue had to be dealt with. I think that if not for this std issue we would still be communicating, although sparingly compared to before when we were starting to date. But at least enough to keep the window of opportunity going.I just want to know if he appreciated my honesty and my regard for his health? What goes through your mind when this happens? Would you for example agree to see me again for dinner or coffee sometime in the future? Or would you clear me off your social calendar completely? I really like this guy and actually thought it was a mistake to tell him...Or should I just move on and get over it?
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ex girlfriend, his ex, move on, std Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Jayney Y +, writes (28 October 2009):
 Hmm, my guess would be that you probably caught it off of him if he wasn't too concerned by it. Most people would react by being surprised at least, and being grateful that you told them if they were certain that they never had it before they were with you, and why would he have to tell anyone else unless he'd slept with them between ending things with you and the time that you told him and he got a test? If he suspected that his ex had given it to him, and hence you got it, I'd be wiping him from my social calendar, never mind about the other way 'round. That's if it was his ex, are you sure he was monogamous with you?
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