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| | pinktopaz's profile:I'm 24, from the great state of Cal-ee-fawn-eeya, or for those that don't know what I'm talking about, just California. Born and raised.
I think I've dated just about every type of guy...the asshole/jerk/degrading, the nice/treats women like they should be treated, the manchild that doesn't know what he wants/has peterpan complex, the bad boy, losers, annoying guys...
And after all that, I feel like I just haven't even started. But I just like to help people out. I can be too opininated at times and wonder why the heck some people are even putting up with some peoples' crap. So I figure I can at least help someone out to make them a little happier. At least just give an affirmation that what their thinking is in the right direction. Some things just don't need to be sugarcoated =) |
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I would like to take the relationship onto a physical level but all I ever get is a goodnight kiss.
Q. Hi, I have been seeing a lovely guy for bout 2 months now but not had many dates cos of his work pattern - he works day and nite shifts. He is really lovely and we always end up having a good laugh and seem to like a lot of the same things. We met ...
A. 15 November 2008: I think Emily gave an exceptional answer. He could be afraid--doesn't want to take things to the physical level if he's not getting any clues from you. Don't come off as desperate and throw yourself at him. A little more flirtation and a more ... (read in full...)
My guy friend tongue kissed me...do you think he 'really' likes me?
Q. well, my guy friend tongue kissed and cuddled one night. now, he said he was sorry for kissing me and that he was sleepy. he also said that he did not want to give me the wrong impression. when we kissed it did not feel like he did it on an ...
A. 28 October 2008: That's not a question any of us can answer, only him. He could be making up excuses because maybe he thought you didn't like it and he doesn't want to end up feeling like a jackass if he likes you and you don't like him back. Or he could have just ... (read in full...)
My gf needs time to think as she still misses her ex bf! Do I give her the space?
Q. So my girlfriend says she needs time to think about things because she still misses her ex. She says she loves me more than she has loved anyone but she still thinks we can't be together. I just found out that she has been calling him and meeting ...
A. 28 October 2008: She wants to have her cake and eat it too. Don't allow it, she'll walk all over you. Sure, give her space, but don't wait for her. Meet other people and if sometime in the future you end up together then that's what happens. But don't sit around ... (read in full...)
Ladies, how much does physical attractiveness, in a man, mean to you?
Q. I feel so insecure about my body these days, I know I'm not at the peek of physical fitness but I am an active person and feel like I shouldn't have to be the guy rippling with muscles and washboard abs. What I want to know is... Women how much...
A. 28 October 2008: Ask yourself the same question. Not everybody is going to be attracted to the same type of person. However, are you TRULY attracted to someone who isn't very secure with themself or just not very physically attractive? Not every girl likes guys ... (read in full...)
My family tells me to stay away from him or they won't help me but I still love him!
Q. hi, im a 28/f. I was in a bad relationship, he hurt me physically and emtionally, and took over my money. We broke up , but we have a child together and i still love him and want to chat, but my family tells me to stay away from him, and they ...
A. 22 August 2008: He made you feel good unlike your family? What?!? Ditto what Cupidguy said! I don't mean to criticize...but really? Your family is doing this because they don't know what else to do to keep you away from the guy! You said so yourself that it ... (read in full...)
Can I succeed in life even if I don't totally complete school?
Q. iM A graduating at the end of the year and most likly wont get all my senoir point on my certificate. Im stressing so much that i will never be anything or wont get anywhere. Has anyone else failed grade twelve but still become something great? I am ...
A. 22 August 2008: Paris Hilton never finished high school...haha. Finish school. Life isn't easy. The people that didn't finish school already had a great gift--either through persuasion or a great idea or are lucky. If you don't have a great talent--finish ... (read in full...)
I'm obsessed with my ex and he's getting married!
Q. Hi,i'm 18 and I have been obssessed with my ex-boyfriend, I'm afraid that this has been effecting my life, personal and professional. I haven't seen him in over 5 months. It was a long distance relationship, But we finally called it quits about a ...
A. 22 August 2008: I think you shouldn't even worry about that. Obviously you respect yourself and you have certain boundaries: you won't have sex until you're married. With that said, if that was his reasoning he is a complete ass. If someone truly loves you and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't want me to have contact with my ex, or with guys on line.
Q. I've been dating this guy for 5 months, he doesn't like me to have any contact with my ex, even texting because his ex cheated on him with her ex. I don't talk to my ex very often, he text me once in a while to see how I'm doing and that's the end ...
A. 22 August 2008: Yes, your boyfriend is being reasonable in not wanting you to talk to your ex or any other guys. Maybe I'm totally blind to the reason why people even stay in contact with their ex's, but I never see the point. I see it this way: a boyfriend is a ... (read in full...)
I seem to have dreams, that come true , but to other people around me, is this a coincidence or what, can somebody help?
Q. Hi this may sound wierd, but can someone help me.??? I always have dreams about things that always occur in my future. I once had a dream that I was pregnant and it felt so real but I awoke from it and fortunately it wasn't...but a week later I ...
A. 21 August 2008: This happens to me as well. Sometimes more than others. For a while it was happening quite frequently, then went away, and then came back. They were too bizarre of dreams that ended up actually occurring for me not to think that there is a ... (read in full...)
I'm obsessed with my ex and he's getting married!
Q. Hi,i'm 18 and I have been obssessed with my ex-boyfriend, I'm afraid that this has been effecting my life, personal and professional. I haven't seen him in over 5 months. It was a long distance relationship, But we finally called it quits about a ...
A. 21 August 2008: Time! And I know that's a sucky answer, but things take time, especially when it's getting over someone you were in love with. If you two only broke up a month ago and he's already getting married...WTF? So I'm guessing he was seeing someone else ... (read in full...)
Male Opinions: He worshipped me and now avoids me!
Q. I'm 35 and have been in a relationship for a year with a 39 y/o man. I believed was my soul mate. Alex also felt the same way about me. We have known each other for 2 years prior to our relationship ever beginning. We had coffee one day and out of ...
A. 21 August 2008: To put it simply: you're always there. Yes, you're the one who always caves in first and makes the first call. Dont't try and win a man over by buying him gifts, although it is because you care and it is his birthday--you cater to him way too ... (read in full...)
Jealous, Insecure, Contolling, Possessive, Clingy Girlfriend (Who I love with everything)
Q. Me and my girlfriend fight almost every day, and most of the time, its about the smallest little thing. The fights get loud and emotionally charged. We have identified a few of the problems with both of us. One of them is that we both get angry or ...
A. 21 August 2008: Here's what I think: you telling her all what you think is going to cause her to turn things around on you. She'll say that she does what she does because of you. Honestly, you two are really young, and it's a shame to be stuck in a relationship ... (read in full...)
None of my friends are in any of my classes this year, I don't know what to do!
Q. well today i started school. In all of my classes none of my friends were there. I don't have any friends in my classes. Now i'm all left alone with no one to talk to. Everyone seems to have their own friends. The students in all of my classes don't ...
A. 19 August 2008: Aww..don't feel this way! I think you may have a case of inferiority complex. It's the first day of class...you'll make friends and have people to talk to after a little while! Try going to college and having to do things in groups or pairs and ... (read in full...)
Is there a chance I could have HIV?
Q. ok i have just found out that my sexual partner is supposed to be hiv positive, the last time we had sex was on the 8 of this month and we used protection, could there be a chance of me having it, i also went to get my first pap smear on aug.14 and ...
A. 19 August 2008: I would get checked anyway. Just because the condom could be defective. Also, get tested several times! Sometimes it can take a while for it to show. Hope everything ends up ok :) Also, how did you recently find out that your partner is HIV ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant, but my husband doesn't want another baby. I don't know what to do.
Q. Hi Im 25 year old female married and have two beautiful children.Ive just found out that im pregant with our third,and my husband wants me to have an abortion. I want this baby but scared this baby may destroyed out marrige.I dont know what to do?...
A. 19 August 2008: If YOU don't want to do it, then don't. I'll be honest, I had an abortion and I really didn't want to, but I mainly did it to make the guy happy and because I figured it was for the best (which it might have been, who knows). Anyhow, I would say ... (read in full...)
I thought he was rude to ask me to swallow so soon!
Q. i just started dating this 23 year old guy about a month ago..I'm 20..we became physical fairly quickly, but no sex...however the 2nd time i gave him oral sex he asked me to swallow...i thought that was very rude and being a big mouthed girl i ...
A. 16 August 2008: I honestly don't know why you would find that offensive. Obviously you're giving him oral to try to please him and him asking you to swallow was just something he wanted you to do to "enhance" the experience. I really don't think there's a certain ... (read in full...)
Go to counseling, deal with it or run?
Q. So, I've been with my now fiance for 2 yrs we've lived 2gthr 4 a while. He's caring and says that he wouldn't leave me and hasn't cheated. Problem is recently I found out he was dating his ex two months after we were "offical"! W...
A. 16 August 2008: Sorry, but...what a loser! You should not even consider marrying this so-called man. I doubt you want to be with a person like him your whole life. Don't settle for him--he doesn't deserve you! He deserves some other trash just like him! I ... (read in full...)
I'm at a loss for words, what's going on? Is he not happy anymore?
Q. Before I met my husband he had two children.we've been together for nine yrs and married for six yrs.I am pregnant with our third child my husband told me that if I have this baby it will make our relationship bad. he told me the way we intrepid ...
A. 16 August 2008: Whatever issue he has, I don't think it has anything to do with you. He's unhappy with himself and with what has been happening in his life, so he has decided to bring you down with him, hence, misery loves company. He is totally degrading you and ... (read in full...)
I want to sleep with my boss
Q. I fancy my boss like crazy and i WANT to sleep with him, even though hes married and got kids? how do i get him 2 want me too? how shall i act? dress? make up? perfume? hair? ...
A. 15 August 2008: I find lots of people attractive and would like to have sex with them...but I don't. Find someone who IS NOT married that you find attractive and have sex with them. I'm sorry for being judgemental...but what kind of person are you? Knowing that ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants a break to straighten his life but I don't want to wait forever help?!
Q. My boyfriend told me he wanted a break so he can concentrate on working and moving out of his house so he can start college. I understand exactly where he is coming from too. He said he still loves me but now he never really tells me anymore. Im ...
A. 15 August 2008: All you can do is give him his space. If you try to push him for an answer or make him be with you, he'll really distance himself. Like I always say, get involved with things you like to do or try new things. You don't have to go out and find a ... (read in full...)
Should I accept sharing my boyfriend with another woman???
Q. I have a boyfriend who had this other not so serious relationship before we met. He continues to see that woman and tells me everytime that he sees her. As this bothers me, I do not know how to address this issue to him. I do not want to give him up ...
A. 15 August 2008: Why are you with him? You should be with someone who is devoted to you, not you AND some other woman. There are so many guys out there, why would you want to settle for someone who is selfish and wants to "have their cake and eat it too"? I'm ... (read in full...)
He has left his wife for me, but now my feelings have faded. What do I do?
Q. For the last few years I have been seeing a married man. He is from another country and comes here for work every few months. I truly loved him in the beginning but now I am not so sure that I do anymore... - HE recently left his wife (for me) ...
A. 15 August 2008: Be honest and don't get involved with married men. You probably liked the thrill of being the other woman that he longed to be with and now that you have him, you don't want him. Also, if you were to have a future with him, what makes you think he ... (read in full...)
I'm scared I'm pregnant and don't know anyone old enough to buy the morning after pill.
Q. I'm Stephanie, I'm 13 and I've had sex about 2 days ago and that was my first time ever. I'm afraid I might be pregnant and I don't know anyone legal age besides family to buy me the morning after pill!!!! help please!...
A. 15 August 2008: You can go to Planned Parenthood--you don't have to have an adult get it for you. It's confidential.... (read in full...)
My ex's new boyfriend is cheating on her. I don't know if I should tell anyone or not.
Q. ok so my ex and her new bf have been going out almost a month.(by the way we broke up a month and a half ago) her new bf went to florida for a week and found this girl and hooked up with her. he texted my friend and i read the text cuz i had his ...
A. 15 August 2008: Sometimes it's easy to say to ignore it and that it's not any of your business. But if you still care about your ex-girlfriend and don't want her to get hurt--I say you should let her know. I'm sure this won't be the first time he'll cheat on her, ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend lied to me big time. Should I break up with him?
Q. so basically my boyfriend lied to me. big time. for starters, i don't want to be with someone that does drugs or drinks. so he told me that he's never going to drink or smoke weed ever again. so i trusted him and believe him. but then his friend ...
A. 15 August 2008: He's going to do what he's going to do. And trying to get him to not do those things IS trying to change him. That is the person he is--he likes to drink and smoke weed with his friends. If you want to be with someone who doesn't do those things, ... (read in full...)
Are we too young for marriage? How do we get others to be happy for us?
Q. Well I have been dating my bf since 6/30/08 and I am completely in love with him. he's my world and always makes me feel special. About a week ago we were talking and he told me that I was the girl for him and that he wanted to marry me. I said yes ...
A. 13 August 2008: Your family may not approve of you two as boyfriend and girlfriend because they may view him differently than you do. What you see and what other people see can sometimes be a lot different. Some people think the abusive husband/boyfriend is such ... (read in full...)
How do you know how long you'll last in bed?
Q. well im 14 and i still havent went through full puberty. ( i got pubes and the parts are beggining to grow) so how can i know i can last in sexual intercourse? i mean i want to know because i dont want to last 5 minutes with my 1st time. sincerly ...
A. 13 August 2008: Well that's good of you to think that way. But don't set your standards too high your first time :)... (read in full...)
Should I take a chance and move with him, or stay and finish college?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. He is on a visa and in 11 months he must find a waiver job somewhere in the U.S. or he must go back to his home country. He has asked if I would move with him, but his options are limited.It is ...
A. 13 August 2008: DON'T DO IT!!! I moved for a guy and it was only 4 hours away. I left a great job, my family, and set myself a year behind in college. Finish what you need to finish first; then consider moving with him.... (read in full...)
How can I get over my dependence on pot?
Q. so i have a drug problem. i have smoked weed for 17 years on a constant basis. it has never interfered with anything. i have always held a higher up position at work and i never let it come in contact with my family or anything. basically, you ...
A. 13 August 2008: I don't know if you know this or not, but marijuana isn't an addictive drug. You act like you "need" it and stated that your boyfriend quit "cold turkey." The reason why you feel depressed is because marijuana has been linked to depression. Just ... (read in full...)
Are we too young for marriage? How do we get others to be happy for us?
Q. Well I have been dating my bf since 6/30/08 and I am completely in love with him. he's my world and always makes me feel special. About a week ago we were talking and he told me that I was the girl for him and that he wanted to marry me. I said yes ...
A. 13 August 2008: Here's what you need to understand. You two are in the infatuation stage. You "think" you're in love...you have awesome euphoric feelings and can't get them out of your head. It's all chemical. Once that settles down--then you'll have a much ... (read in full...)
How easy is it to kiss a friend who is drunk?
Q. never really got drunk, so wonderin at a club how easy is it to kiss a friend who is drunk? Nothing more just a nice kiss? :) coz i'm goin out soon. Thank you...
A. 13 August 2008: Wouldn't you rather kiss someone when it's more of a challenge than waiting for them to get liquored up?... (read in full...)
Should I participate in an orgy with my boyfriend and his 2 best friends?
Q. well i recently turned 16, so i wouldnt be doin anything illegal, and ive been sexually active with my boyfriend for over a year now, so i have nothing to lose, exept my pride? maybe? i just dunno!! my boyfriends friends and me were out in town on ...
A. 13 August 2008: Besides losing your pride, how about losing your self respect? If you don't want to do it, then don't. And even if you think you do, you will probably feel horrible after...not to mention that even though your silly boyfriend thinks it's a good ... (read in full...)
How do I trace the woman my husband met online and had an affair with?
Q. Husband has had a affair for 4 months last year with a woman he met on the internet. He then went to Afghanistan and we are no further forward in repairing the marriage. He is on leave at the moment and i have said in order for me to believe what he ...
A. 13 August 2008: First off, do you really want to know exactly what they did and how many times? You already know he's a liar and that he cheated, spare yourself some heartache and don't try to find out the details. Even if you did have any info on her, I don't ... (read in full...)
Is the younger man I'm seeing playing a game?
Q. I'm in love with a man who is forty years old and I am 60. I really don't look much older than late forties. We became very close last year, but then had a break up. We have now starting seeing each other occasionally again but there seems to be ...
A. 13 August 2008: Gosh, 40 year-old men still act like this?! Well, I would say that in his eyes, he's not playing games. But he may be having a commitment issue. This leads to him stringing you along because he cannot decide what he wants. Just live your own ... (read in full...)
What do you think, Is there ant hope for me?
Q. My bf of 4.5 years dumped me 2 weeks ago. He was acting distant and not really affectionate 3 weeks before we broke up. I knew he liked this younger girl at his job (we are only 21 yrs old btw and she just turned 17)... I kept asking and asking ...
A. 13 August 2008: Typical male...wants what he can't have. You noticed that when you cry and act upset he runs the other way, and when you're happy and not bothered he's interested. Like The Listener said, he wants to have his cake and eat it too. I'm sure you ... (read in full...)
How can I tell if he wants to have sex?
Q. My boyfriend always makes comments such as "lets have sex" but he only ever txts them so i dunno if he is being serious or not. How can i tell if he really want to have sex? As he is the shy type that wouldnt ever dream of saying it to my face and i ...
A. 13 August 2008: Oh, snap! 16 in September! Well that makes a huge difference...*rolls eyes*... (read in full...)
I slept with a married man who really seemed to like me. Now he says it won't happen again and not to tell anyone.help
Q. hi im a 30 year old female and been friends with a 30 year old male for about 3 years we talk on the net and hes always liked chatting me up we both have 2 children and hes married.when i went round a week ago we ended up having sex.and turns round ...
A. 13 August 2008: Didn't you just ask this yesterday? You asked if him saying that it was "no strings" really meant that it was "no strings." Get over him. Telling everybody not only looks bad on him, but also on you. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has started to ignore me and won't talk to me. How do I deal with this?
Q. hi. me and my boyfriend have been really happy until recently. we had a pretty gd relationship b4 but the only problem was that he never seemed to want to go out with me anywhere. recently my bf has started to ignore me and wen i try to tlk to ...
A. 13 August 2008: I don't think guys even know why they act this way. It's fairly common. Just give him his space. Pushing him to give you answers only pushes him away further. You're doing the right thing by not talking to him. He'll come around eventually, you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend might be going to prison for three months and his dad says they'll have to move away. Also his ex keeps coming on to him. HELP.
Q. Basically.. I'm goin out with a guy who's got a court case tomorrow because he got jumped on whilst out one night and used self defence. Unfortunately when the police pulled them apart, they found his work knife in his bag (He was not going to use ...
A. 13 August 2008: His dad threatening to move could just be out of anger--or he really could. Even if so, no. Your boyfriend doesn't have to go if he's an adult, but if he still lives at home, then I'm guessing that will be where he has to go if he has nowhere else ... (read in full...)
How can I tell if he wants to have sex?
Q. My boyfriend always makes comments such as "lets have sex" but he only ever txts them so i dunno if he is being serious or not. How can i tell if he really want to have sex? As he is the shy type that wouldnt ever dream of saying it to my face and i ...
A. 13 August 2008: Of course he does! If he's male and has hit pubery, he wants to have sex with you. I think he's being serious, but too shy (as you said) to say it in a serious manner; in other words, he's immature. But that's a given when you're a boy in the ... (read in full...)
How do you know how long you'll last in bed?
Q. well im 14 and i still havent went through full puberty. ( i got pubes and the parts are beggining to grow) so how can i know i can last in sexual intercourse? i mean i want to know because i dont want to last 5 minutes with my 1st time. sincerly ...
A. 12 August 2008: Like harcourt said, don't worry about that sort of stuff your first time. It's already probably going to be awkward and something exciting and new to you--so don't even worry about how long you'll last. That stuff comes later, when you're older ... (read in full...)
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