Girlfriend and I went away together for a whole week and nothing happened sexually
Q. If you went away with your partner and you didn’t do anything in bed, would you consider that normal? It was a whole week and I never been so stressed, trying to plan things, make sure it’s all right, so it would of been nice to be intimate in our ...
A. 12 September 2019: There are so many variables here, so please excuse the questions but I'm just trying for a bit of the back story.
Do you currently live together, as you refer to her as your partner. Was the week away in the posh hotel planned by you both or did o... (read in full...)
My fiancé is being mean and ridiculous!
Q. Hey and thanks So my fiancé and I were planning a trip together. We had a disagreement and he said some nasty stuff to me. Called me names and actually threatened to rip my mouth off. I was shocked ! I couldn’t believe this man I’m supposed...
A. 9 September 2019: Cancel your flight and then change the locks on the doors. If he doesn't care enough to tell you if he is still there or not so you can meet up with him then he is sending you a very strong message.
Treat this as a wake up call and give thanks y... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a man to become nasty and aggressive over not having enough sex?
Q. is is normal for a man to become nasty and aggressive over not having enough sex because that is how my boyfriend is and I give him lots of sex five times a day every weekend. I feel like his constant pressure is starting to put me off him and sex ...
A. 9 September 2019: Do you only see each other on the weekends?
Does he show his love in other ways, shared meals, conversations, outings, the odd meal out, going on dates etc or is it just sex on demand.
To be blunt are you a girlfriend to him, somebody he... (read in full...)
Second cousin is pregnant with my child. How do we tell family, and what about the doctor?
Q. My second cousin and I always been close. We are the same age (I am six months older). When we were teenagers, we did experiment with each other sexually. But that never impacted our relationship in a negative way. We always hung out on the weeke...
A. 4 September 2019: If you are concerned about the family relationship then by all means discuss it with your doctor, who will allay any fears you may have. The increased risk of there being problems with the baby is only marginal.
As for telling your families... (read in full...)
Can a relationship work and last if it began with an affair?
Q. It’s messy it’s complicated but I need advice. I started working in a local bar about 8 months ago. I’m 24 and when I started working there I met a man he’s 40. It started as friendly. He would always advise me on customers and always told me ...
A. 4 September 2019: Oh my dear girl, this player certainly knows how to pull your strings and ring your bell.
Firstly, let me tell you about a friend of mine in a relationship with a married man for 12 years, he kept promising her the moon and the stars and she beli... (read in full...)
Girlfriend still hanging with ex-FWB
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 6 months. In the beginning of our relationship she was still seeing her FWB, but 2 weeks in we decided to become exclusive. She originally wanted a relationship with the guy before, but he didn't. They weren't ...
A. 4 September 2019: We don't "let" people do things that are hurting us. Or we shouldn't be letting people do things that hurt us.
As I get older I realise we shouldn't be with or around people who hurt us. This girl is hurting you and your relationship. Her form... (read in full...)
I left, he wants me back. What should I do?
Q. Hi Friends, I have two kids almost 3 and almost 2. I was engaged with their father for almost 3years.He was very sweet when we first met but after my first pregnancy he started changing more argument about financial.He was upset with one night I...
A. 17 August 2019: No. You have told him you don't want to be with him. You have good reason to not be with him, physical abuse is never okay. If you take him back and he hits you … and he will hit you, make no mistake about that …. you will be teaching your kids ... (read in full...)
We've broken up but he talks as though we're still together
Q. Hi I’ve recently broken up with my partner due to a few reasons we split up nearly 2 weeks ago but he is acting as though we are still together he won’t talk to me about any problems we have this is one of the reasons I ended it but now he’s talking ...
A. 15 August 2019: If you are living in the same house put plans in place to move out as soon as you can ….
If you are NOT sharing accommodation then simply remind him you are no longer in a relationship with him and block him, on facebook, on messenger and block hi... (read in full...)
Is what is happening to me financial abuse?
Q. Would you call this financial abuse? I go to work and support my husband who has little respect for me anyway. He also pressures me to sometimes support his parents as he so desperately wants to please them, even though they are just using him and ...
A. 14 August 2019: It certainly sounds as if this situation is not going to improve. I think you should consider divorce, and just in case there is a chance he will be angry start planning now by hiding any small amounts of money you can, take important papers etc to ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend just going through a phase? Trying to impress a friend?
Q. Im in this relationship for like about 2 years now and things have changed somuch recently. At first my BF was super nice to me and all was working out. We used to go out sometimes to places and have fun and he was like always very kind and sweet. ...
A. 14 August 2019: He raped you and then requested you dress slutty because his new mate's girlfriend looks "amazing?"
Sweetheart, this guy is abusive. You need to remove yourself from this relationship as soon as you can.
I hope you take the good advice you ... (read in full...)
He never asks about me our conversations are shallow
Q. So I've been dating X for a little over a month, while we are dating exclusively we are taking it slow and are not in a relationship yet. He's a super nice and overall great guy, our dates are fun, he respects my space and I feel it's going great......
A. 9 August 2019: Are you expecting too much by thinking your boyfriend should treat you the way you treat him? No!
If you want this relationship to grow you need to talk to him, ask him straight out "do you realise you never seem interested in hearing about me... (read in full...)
I'm in love with 2 men and unable to choose
Q. I'm in love with two men and unable to choose. my long term boyfriend who I have been with for over a decade but I find im not physically attracted to him anymore and don't want sex with him but I do love him and his personality is like my soul ...
A. 6 August 2019: If you truly believe in your heart that one of these men were right for you then your heart would also tell you which one.
You don't love either of them, if you loved the long term guy you wouldn't have, or continue to, cheat on him, if you love... (read in full...)
I want to trust him but how can I when hes so private about everything?
Q. Hello and thank you for your advice I did post once before here. I snooped through my husbands cell. I know it was wrong but hes so secretive and if I ask him something he won't answer me. So yes I had a bad feeling and looked through his cell...
A. 1 August 2019: Does your husband think trust is something that comes in a box? Trust takes a very long time to grow, and can be broken in an instant, as you have found.
You cant go from being the wife of a two time cheater straight back to being a trusting... (read in full...)
Do I have to invite this person to my party?
Q. I'm having a birthday party soon.I have to restrict numbers because of budget. Some of the people coming are frinds of my gf- I've been with her for 10 years. There's one particular guy I can't stand. He often makes digs at me, and although never d...
A. 30 July 2019: I'm assuming you go to his parties because your girlfriend gets invited.
Do you and your girlfriend live together, if you do then the party could be considered to be given by both of you and so then yes, your girlfriend would need to invite t... (read in full...)
My girlfriend's hoarder sist.er wont move out
Q. My girlfriends sister (41) will not move out! My girlfriend (28) and I (27) have been together for about three years...for most of that we have lived together. The first year my girlfriend rented and I moved in with her and not long after her s...
A. 26 July 2019: Could you accept her in the house if she cleared out some stuff and slept in her bedroom, and paid a fair share of utilities and other costs? I can understand your girlfriend being reluctant to move her on, there will be all sorts of underlying ... (read in full...)
How can I get my partner to be a better parent?
Q. Hi I’ve been with my fiancé for 8 years we have a 4 year old daughter I have a 11 year old daughter from a previous relationship the problem is not a very good father he has never done any night Feeds or changed a nappy when she was a baby I have ...
A. 24 July 2019: You cannot force your fiancé to be a better parent. The longer you stay in this situation the more you will be reinforcing the idea that this is what fathers are like for your 4 year old daughter.
If you are the person who has written about th... (read in full...)
My girlfriend constantly complains about her weight but wont do anything about it!
Q. How do I deal with my gf complaining about her weight. I used to pressure her to keep an eye in her weight but she loves eating junk. I gave up about 3-4 years ago as we went from size 10 to 16. She is adamant it’s because it’s certain parts an...
A. 23 July 2019: Next time she brings it up suggest she have a full medical check … not knowing anything about her life my first thought is depression, the second just plain lack of motivation. She wants the result (to wear dresses like her friends), without having ... (read in full...)
How can I make my boyfriend realize how awful he's been to me?
Q. My boyfriend has been horrible to me lately and I'm really upset that he doesn't feel bad for treating me the way he has. Last week he asked me to book a last minute holiday, I don't know why he couldn't do it himself but just text me his card...
A. 15 July 2019: He is an abusive bully … you are correct. I can totally understand why you don't want to see him any more. Sadly he will not feel guilt or accept his behaviour and actions so best to just end it without expecting anything decent from him.
Block... (read in full...)
Why is my mum acting this way? Does she not like my boyfriend?
Q. Hi everyone - I was just wondering if anyone could help me solve some family issues which I think are regarding my current partner. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and we are very happy. He basically has moved in with me (it sort of just...
A. 12 July 2019: Move out, having an extra in your home is fine for a short time but your Mum may now be thinking her house is not her own. Her kitchen is no longer her kitchen, you say you and your boyfriend do your own cooking, which suggests you don't even sit ... (read in full...)
Should I believe my married man?
Q. Just decided to break up with my MM after over 12 years We had a lot of ups and downs as well I just got to the point now where I had enough He tells me i’m the love of his life the woman he loves with all his heart , but that there is no way ...
A. 11 July 2019: In an affectionless marriage the kids, who are adult enough to have kids of their own, would have picked up any bad vibes that were around, they would notice the lack of affection, they would see and feel if the relationship lacked love …. if the ... (read in full...)
My ex and I had a big fight and have to be together for a week and a 15 hour car ride. How do I handle this?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles. Thank you for taking the time to read my post. its a bit long. I'm feeling a bit bewildered, hurt and pretty angry all at the same time. I have just had the weirdest experience with my now ex, all of 20 minutes ago, best ...
A. 30 June 2019: His attitude is completely wrong. Where was his head when all those disabled are abled campaigns were running, has he ever completed workshops on inclusions and the like. Has he never heard of the disability discrimination act of 1992?
Serio... (read in full...)
She thanked me, said she had a good time but also said she is not looking for anything serious
Q. I matched and got talking to a girl on a online dating app.. Few messages later went out for dinner. Holy smokes she is stunning. I don’t have a clue how it went. She kept thanking me and saying she had a good time. But also said she is not looking ...
A. 31 May 2019: What's this "being a gentleman has cost me" bullshit?
Can you explain what you mean by that?
She said she is not looking for anything serious, that is a polite way of saying she doesn't want you to text her.
So, let it go and keep looking f... (read in full...)
Thought she was my friend, is it me or has she changed?
Q. I’m not sure where to start as I’m in complete shock at the moment. a while ago I joined a dating site to find myself a girlfriend as I’ve been single for nearly a year. came across a female who I liked and seem to get on well with each other. it ...
A. 31 May 2019: You met on a dating site, where people go looking for dates, not good friends.
As for you giving her your opinion on her rushing into relationships and sleeping with men too fast …. eh, she probably agreed with you to shut you up. She wants yo... (read in full...)
Why do men stare and smile but never acknowledge
Q. Why is it that some men stare but never speak? I work with a lot of men at a fairly large grocery chain. I was doing my grocery shopping one night after work and smiled almost instinctively at an extremely attractive man. Later that night I ran...
A. 31 May 2019: In my book smiling at somebody is acknowledgment. You pretending to be busy on your phone and not acknowledging him, seems to have been very noticeable, and probably appeared rude.
What is it you REALLY want he, conversations? There is no reaso... (read in full...)
Are there any laws on verbal abuse?
Q. Hello there, What is your view on verbal abuse? I was having a drink with a kinda newish 'friend' (a friend of my estranged brothers - who are both violent narcissists but no-one knows my past with them) and he suddenly turned the subject into...
A. 29 May 2019: The danger here is that you will be viewed as a vexatious litigant …. you have little to no chance of winning a case in a court of law, and if you did get it as far as court and then lost or it is thrown out of court, which I suspect will be the ... (read in full...)
I know my ex still loves me but this isn't going to go anywhere
Q. long story short Friend of many years became boyfriend. Broke up citing family not agreeing for marriage on his side. At first i thought we are maintaining friendship while he called once in a while. But now it seems like he finds reasons to keep ...
A. 28 May 2019: There is a very crude saying for his actions, he needs to shit or get off the pot!
His behaviour is keeping you hooked, offering glimmers of hope when you know there is none. His behaviour is reprehensible and should not be tolerated. He needs... (read in full...)
Are there any laws on verbal abuse?
Q. Hello there, What is your view on verbal abuse? I was having a drink with a kinda newish 'friend' (a friend of my estranged brothers - who are both violent narcissists but no-one knows my past with them) and he suddenly turned the subject into...
A. 27 May 2019: I did a quick google search "UK verbal abuse" … apparently the relevant law comes under the following:
http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1986/64#pt1-l1g4
You need to decide what you expect to come of this ….have you reliable witnesses, will ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend cant see my point of view and issued an ultimatum
Q. I'm in a bit of a dilemma as I've just started a relationship with a girl who I really thought was the one. We've been going out for about four months now and I really do love her and she loves me. She's just been on a massive rant to me today ...
A. 24 May 2019: Short answer: run for the hills!
Tell your girlfriend your holiday plans remain in place and if she doesn't like it she knows where the door is.
It would appear you and your girlfriend have very different views on what is, and isn't, acceptabl... (read in full...)
I broke it off ... so how come he hasn't unfriended me on facebook?
Q. Hi, i need some advise. I broke up with my LDR bf of 3 months ,this weekend sent him message on facebook that i want to break up with him and he just said he respect ny decision. But he never unfriend or even blocked me on facebook. Why you think ...
A. 20 May 2019: We cant read his mind about why he hasn't unfriended you or blocked you on facebook.
You broke it off and he said okay. Surely that's better than breaking it off and then have the guy say rotten things to you or about you, or threaten you in s... (read in full...)
One date later, should I pursue this girl?
Q. I have been internet dating for a little while now and have had 4 dates. The last was a woman from Canada who is visiting over here for a month. She contacted me and explained she was travelling but we chatted a little online and we went for a dr...
A. 20 May 2019: If she wanted to pursue a potential relationship she would have indicated this in some way, either by word or by returning to say goodbye.
My gut instinct is that the date went so well because on her part there was no pressure to "perform... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's live in grandfather is undermining me with my children. I don't know what to do
Q. We aren't married but we have two children together. A year ago, his grandfather came to stay with us after he became widowed an needs caring for. We didn't think it was right to put him in a home and he can't really live alone. My grandfather lived ...
A. 15 May 2019: At first I was with the others saying your boyfriend needs to say something … I am disagreeing. Talk to your boyfriend, discuss what needs to be done, and then when the kids are in bed both of you sit Grandpa down and have the chat. You do the ... (read in full...)
I know I should just walk away .... but I love him.
Q. Hi I wonder if anyone can help me.. So I have been with my boyfriend for just over 3years and also he's an overthinker and recently he was feeling a little depressed. I supported him and was going out of my way to be there all the time .. he was m...
A. 9 May 2019: This man is treating you badly hoping you will end it so that he wont feel guilty about dumping you.
Stop playing his stupid childish games, block his number and block him on social media, have a good cry for a few weeks, you are permitte... (read in full...)
I'm afraid of dogs and now I'm in love with a person who has a dog
Q. I'm 33 years old male and as silly as it might sound, I've been terrified of dogs my whole life. When I was 8 years old I was attacked by pack of dogs and I was bitten so severely I had to spend weeks in hospital. I still have scars and ever since ...
A. 8 May 2019: Her dog giving you its toy means he was showing you he wanted to be friends. Tell your girlfriend about your fears, and then talk to your GP for a referral to somebody who will be able to help you overcome your fear.
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend just stood and watched while I was struggling rather than help me. Was this mean? Selfish?
Q. I went shopping with my boyfriend and I was struggling to carry the bags so one of the bags fell on the floor and I was struggling to pick it up meanwhile my boyfriend just stood there and watched me struggle. I said thanks for helping me and he ...
A. 8 May 2019: Here is my view as a woman: you should have asked for his help instead of making a sarcastic comment, he should have apologised and helped instead of making a scene all the way home.
You two need to learn how to communicate, and learn how to ask e... (read in full...)
LDR wont introduce me to his teenager son which means we cant spend some weekends together
Q. I have been in a long distance relationship for 4 months He is 68yrs old has 15 yr old alternate wknds I am 62 one son 28 lives away he wont introduce me to his son so we can spend wknds together Am I being unreasonable? I work f/t m-f ...
A. 14 April 2019: I think you might just have to accept it, 4 months into a relationship is not long enough for most parent to introduce their kids to a new partner or to advertise the fact they are having sex with that new partner.
His weekends may be busy wit... (read in full...)
I have neve wanted children, husband is being pressured to adopt his orphaned nephew
Q. My husband and I are both 29 and child free by choice. His sister and her husband, both 40, passed away in a car accident two months ago. They left behind a 9 year old who is currently living with my husband's parents. Long story short, his paren...
A. 13 April 2019: You are caught between a rock and a hard place, I should imagine the emotional pressure on your husband will be almost too great to bear. Not only is he needing to think about his aging parents who probably shouldn't be taking on the ... (read in full...)
I'm anxious about wanting a baby soon because of how my life has been but my boyfriend is in no hurry. What do I do?
Q. I am about to turn 26 and I'm freaking out about my age. Technically I know I'm still very young, but I'm scared about having kids too late. This is getting concerning for my boyfriend, and I'm trying not to bring the topic up too often now. My m...
A. 11 April 2019: Given your family history I can understand your concerns. I also understand that is some cultures (Australia for example), marriage prior to children is not seen as essential, and motherhood without a wedding certificate is quite common.
To me... (read in full...)
How do I chose the one to spend my life with?
Q. i got into so much mess its driving me insane. I cant find my way anymore im in two long term relationships one of 21 years and one of 2 years I don't know what to do. I cant seem to make a choice through uncertainty, feeling scared of the pain and ...
A. 8 April 2019: IF you were meant to be spending your life with either of these men then you would not be here asking, your heart and your head would not let you go one more day prevaricating over city or country.
21 years in a relationship and you still can't de... (read in full...)
Does he care or not care ... he keeps contacting me.
Q. I have an ex who reached out to me six months after ghosting me, and tries to pretend nothing came between us. I don’t respond, and he later replies in a passive aggressive manner as if to say “don’t worry I don’t care anyway”. A bit of history, ...
A. 3 April 2019: It doesn't sound like he cares for you, is that what you are hoping for by hanging on?
If you are unhappy with the frequency and tone of his texts the best way to deal with it is to block him.
By responding you are keeping the door open. S... (read in full...)
Is my fiance's treatment of me emotional abuse?
Q. Hi I have been with my fiancée for over two years. Usually he’s charming and sweet. He has a mean streak though. He feels entitled like I should pay for everything cause he makes less money. If we have a disagreement. He says to shut up ...
A. 29 March 2019: This man has no respect for you, why are you even going to marry him, it will only get worse, not better.
... (read in full...)
What kind of body language is this?
Q. Can anyone tell me what type of body language the following comes across in a male (apart from just being a comfortable position). I was sat next to a male friend on a sofa, he had chosen to sit next to me when there were other chairs in the ro...
A. 28 March 2019: Some people claim it is more comfortable … but if that is the case how come men down through the ages haven't been painted, or photographed, doing the man spread? Spreading their legs like that was found to be so offensive in Spain that the ... (read in full...)
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