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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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What does "I love you but I don't want you back" mean???
Q. I spoke with my ex and she has told me two things as she spoke in riddles and I want to know what does she mean by. "I love you but I don't want you back"? and "I love speaking with you as youve done alot for me but I don't want to see y...
A. 26 July 2010: Love doesn't just go away after you break up. Love is not enough to make a person stay. You may not be compatible, or the chemistry isn't there anymore, or whatever it is it can't work out. At least it's a peaceful breakup. ... (read in full...)
Not sure if I want to get her pregnant, but the clock is ticking
Q. I'm in a real predicament. I am recently divorced, and have a new GF that I am in love with and plan on marrying if all continues to go well. Well, we are middle age (40), and she has never had children and really wants to. So do I, but I also ...
A. 25 July 2010: You are in love with her, but is she in love with you? Could be it that she is just waiting for a willing donor and doesn't care if you are financially stable? Would she have sex with you passionately a few days before and after her period? You have ... (read in full...)
Am I not able to love anymore?
Q. Okay, So this will all be very overwhelming. About 2 months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years. I loved him dearly and we were perfect for each other in every way. Somewhere though the sexual chemistry started fading. I had only ever ...
A. 25 July 2010: It's natural to feel this way if you are just recovering from a depression. What a horrible thing to believe that you can't orgasm through sex. Those 4 years you had kept yourself quiet rather than put efforts into communicating what you need and ... (read in full...)
Why did he assume I would hurt him?
Q. hi all, in need of a little advice. a month ago i met a really nice , decent guy, through online dating. we had 5 amazing dates over the course of 4 weeks and connected and got on so well. sex wasnt in the equasion , we just enjoyed eacho...
A. 25 July 2010: I would suggest you not take back your words. You told him you can't wait for him to come around and he took it literally. You probably meant it too. He doesn't want to waste your time in case you want to look for a better guy. I think he's still ... (read in full...)
I broke up with my boyfriend because I wasn't sure he was over his ex girlfriend, and now he won't leave me alone, what do I do?
Q. I was just wondering if anyone can give me some advise on this please.. I've recently ended my relationship with my boyfriend. So we were together for two years, there were good and bad points like there are with any relationship, but I felt the bad ...
A. 25 July 2010: People are always vulnerable in their first relationships since they are open to anything, ready to love anybody and can't tell right or wrong when they are so engrossed in a love relationship. I had been in this situation before. What I did was I ... (read in full...)
I feel as if she's just taking me for granted now... help!
Q. Hey guys, i'm in a bit of a pickle. I've been dating this girl for nearly 8 months now, and she has been starting to not care. I ask her questions, simple, mediocre questions and she replies with "meh" or "i don't fucking care" and frankly has ...
A. 24 July 2010: She's at her age when she's wondering what men are good for, whether relationships are worth it. She only lived her meer 16 years of life and she is impatient to know all the answers. Tell her you would give her time to sort things out and only call ... (read in full...)
I want to find my soulmate.
Q. Ok so I'm a 21 year old, tall, decent looking guy. And I want to find my soulmate (girl). Recently I've been having sex with girls I really don't feel anything for. The sex is ok but I feel like i'm missing something here. This might sound weird ...
A. 24 July 2010: Rather than finding the right person, be the right person. I believe in soulmates just because it's better to have something to believe in. To say they don't exist is to sound negative. Not everybody lives to have a soulmate, the ones that are like ... (read in full...)
I need advice badly! Is he falling out of love with me?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for nearly a year, we have had a rough time with jobs and money worries. I am also very insecure due to past bad experiences, my question is this, my boyfriend has stopped telling me he loves me to my face, he ...
A. 24 July 2010: You may want to hear I love yous for reassurance that the relationship is still worth it. He's stressed out because as a guy he feels more responsible making money. He's worried he's not good enough for you. For a man, to be able to say I love you ... (read in full...)
If he really DOES like me then why hasn't he asked me out?
Q. I'm wondering if my male coworker, who's also my friend at work, is interested in me. He always finds a way to touch me, either on my arm, my face, or my leg. He's joked about us getting married a few times, even though he says he's not ready to ...
A. 24 July 2010: People flirt all they want, but that doesn't mean they are ready for relationships. Don't get tempted to just suggest a place and time and be there or be squared. He's playing with your impatience. Act as cool as you can be. Just brush his hand away ... (read in full...)
He DOES want me back. Should I take him back?
Q. I first wrote on here asking for advice on how to handle my boyfriend telling me that he loves and cares about me but isnt in love with me anymore. I got loads of advice telling me that he is unlikely to come back after saying this. Well its a...
A. 24 July 2010: You have only been with him 20 months ago. You haven't gone through life with him, enough for him to say this to you. You don't have kids or money issues to worry about. Were there a lot of fighting between you two? A guy doesn't fall out of love ... (read in full...)
I like this boy but he don't like to be in relationships
Q. Hi!I am 15 And there is a guy who likes me and i like him a lot he is the most beautiful guy in the school everyone wants to have him he says that he likes me but he still hasn't proposed nothing oficially to me,what shall i really like ...
A. 22 July 2010: Being the most popular guy can actually be difficult in school. He doesn't want to be in a relationship because everyone is competing for him and seeing him like an object. He doesn't like to be swarmed by a bunch of girls and become a topic of ... (read in full...)
I want to make it work with this new guy but I still have feelings for this religious guy
Q. I have been seeing a guy before my current boyfriend. He is three years younger than me. We got on very well, and hung out often. His hugs were tight, affectionate and comforting. I felt good everytime. He is a devoted Christian and has been ...
A. 22 July 2010: If the new guy said to you if you don't have sex with him then you can't be in a relationship, you have to dump both guys. The three of you are using each other. The religious guys is impinging his beliefs upon you to feel right or righteous. You ... (read in full...)
I can't control my anger towards my husband
Q. I can’t control my anger toward my husband and don’t know what to do. When I get angry, I am unable to control my temper, I talk continuously and hurt my husband’s feelings and abuse him a lot verbally. The argument continues until my husband...
A. 21 July 2010: I see a vicious cycle. Life is stressful, we take out your stress onto love ones, kids get affected and do stupid things, parents feel failure, dad overworks, mom feels neglected, mom complains, dad withdraws, mom's angry again, then kids are ... (read in full...)
I like him and a part of me thinks I have a chance with him??
Q. i'm 17. ok so theres this guy. i've liked him since i've meet him and that was 2 years ago. we've never actually went out and dated, but we have messed around a couple times and stuff like that. and well i have like very very strong feelings for ...
A. 21 July 2010: Having a real relationship is much more fun than daydreaming. If he doesn't return your feelings, your friendship would end anyway because you will move on and try to date other guys. He would just be a burden, an obstacle to this. There is no need ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is making great efforts to communicate!
Q. Hello. I have a 10 months relationship with my boyfriend. Recently, I kinda started to push him into being more communicative (sorry, didn't want to make it sound this brutal). He's 25 years old, never had a relationship before, but that's ...
A. 21 July 2010: My mom and Dad are having a relationship like this. When they are in their early 30's my mom complained all the time about his non communication. My Dad felt so sad and one day he just blurted out, "I just don't know what to say." On another day he ... (read in full...)
My wife possibly had sex with two of my co-workers, should I consider divorcing her?
Q. hai, well il go straight to the point..i am a christian man raised with morals and i waited to have sex till i married, now 10yrs down the line my wife tells me i was not her first, she had slept with 6 men 2 of which i work in the same company.i ...
A. 21 July 2010: Your reaction now is the exact reason she didn't tell you before. Why she told you now I don't know. Were you arguing about religious morals and then she told you this to be spiteful?
The title suggests she cheated on you but as I read on I see ... (read in full...)
Why does my wife behave like this? I love her!
Q. I have been married last 30 years, but not happy from my wife just because have the filling that she never loves me from her heart. The reason for that she never smiles, she has never told me once that I love you or never expressed any signs of ...
A. 21 July 2010: You are hoping we have the answers as in general why women behave like this, no we don't. I am thinking she is starting menopause. Wives and husbands adapt to each other. After a long time living with each other, you start to look more like each ... (read in full...)
My man makes me sick!!!
Q. Is this very common, that a man in his forties becomes uninterested in sex and wife. Or does it always depends on the situation? Can a man be totally cold with his wife but get really horny in a new relationship? Is it ok, to be roommates and st...
A. 21 July 2010: No, this has nothing to do with you at all. Men in forties are still very horny. It's common for a man that age to be hyper critical about everything. He may be frustrated with his work, his life. He's not where he wants to be? So to avoid looking ... (read in full...)
Shady goings on...
Q. I feel like my boyfriend is my soulmate. When we are on good terms we tell each other that we feel so complete with each other. But we argue all the time, my boyfriend is the type of guy that will bring stuff back up just to keep the arguement ...
A. 21 July 2010: There has to be a reason for this threesome to take place. He's attracted to her. No one really enjoys being the third girl so to kill off feelings of jealousy she finds a boyfriend but still could not forget about your boyfriend, and your boyfriend ... (read in full...)
Freckles
Q. "OP Own Title" Hi! I have to much freckles! I just want some off not all. I'm filipino-mexicano, I'm just saying, if that changes anything:)... so tell me your remedies that work for you please! ...
A. 21 July 2010: My dad has a faceful of freckles. My mom always make fun of this but he doesn't care. You care but you are a guy so you don't put make up on. You can try laser freckles removal of your parents can agree to this. They are the most effective. Also ... (read in full...)
What is wrong with me? Is this normal?
Q. "Op Own Title" what is wrong with me like seriously:( i need things like clothes, money, shoes, bags to make me happy:( i think is cos am single cos i never use to be like that..i use to be soo in love but now i cant find a good guy i just want ...
A. 20 July 2010: It is not abnormal. Try to find happiness within. Look inside your heart. It's infinite. Rather trying to find the right person be the right person.... (read in full...)
How to figure out the right path after separating with ex
Q. "OP Own Title" My ex and I broke up several months ago. We were together for several years. It was an awful breakup and she was very hurt and angry. She said that she doesn’t love me anymore and now doesn’t even want to be friends. She wont speak ...
A. 20 July 2010: You should let go of your ex girlfriend and start all over again. There is nothing wrong with being nice and understanding and it's not necessarily that women love bad guys. We all have our feminine and masculine sides. The majority of women like ... (read in full...)
How to raise my girlfriends self-esteem?
Q. "OP Own Title" My girlfriend and I have been dating for 5 years and have a 2 year old son and we are both 19. I was recently kicked out of my house and I am now living with my girlfriend, her parents and our son. Ever since I have moved in, about 2 ...
A. 20 July 2010: Her family is very supportive but she's probably feeling not too happy because she is having a kid way too early without a solid home herself and is relying on her parents. She may also feel that her youth is over and is missing out on freedom that ... (read in full...)
Pregnant... and my boyfriend left me...
Q. So I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and I found out about 3 months ago that I am pregnant, and now he is leaving me... What can I say to make him stay, why is he leaving now and not 3 months ago... Help!! Thanks guys... ...
A. 20 July 2010: His feelings of responsibilites are starting to sink in. The most you can say to him is that you are willing to find work, and you are not going to lean on him completely, the rest is up to him. If he's avoiding you then don't contact him at all. ... (read in full...)
I lied and told her I was involved when I'm not but I don't want her to hurt me again!
Q. I just need a reality check here, to make sure I'm not being an idiot. A year ago I started an affair with a woman. We were both married at the time. Shortly after we met, my wife and I decided to separate, and I kept seeing this other woman. She...
A. 20 July 2010: I was just starting to think she was being manipulative when she said she was afraid being alone. She's not manipulative as in controlling, psycho but she needs to do what she has to do in a critical moment being losing you. You did the right thing. ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid I'm driving my guy to lie to me!
Q. I'm afraid that I'm driving my guy to lie to me. I know I freak out about a lot of things, but we are considering having children soon and I want to instill good values in them. My opinion is that we should completely cut out the bad things until ...
A. 20 July 2010: Psychology says the average human person lies 7 times a day. Depends on what he's lying about. Most people lie for convenience and being nice. My grandparents lied about having a stillborn which my mom found out when she was a child, after looking ... (read in full...)
Do I have the right to be mad or am I overreacting.
Q. I’ve been married for three years and we have a one year old son. We have problems the same as everyone else but nothing major. My husband (31) and his sister (35) took their mom (60) to New York City for two nights as a birthday present to their ...
A. 20 July 2010: You have a right to feel anything. Just don't show it to him. You may be losing sleep waiting for his phone call. He may not have seen his mom for a long time, so he's going to catch with her. He'll be back soon and he probably would talk about his ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend wants a break but still stays in contact
Q. So ive read through many posts on this similiar topic and need a little help myself. Me and my girlfriend have been dating for 7 months (shes 18 im 21). Everything was great up until a week and a half ago when we go into our first two arguem...
A. 20 July 2010: When she tell you about the other guy, did you feel jealous? I am from a distant and I can't hear her nuance. Do you think she wanted a break because she met another guy? The greatest healing can come from cuddling with a boyfriend. I don't really ... (read in full...)
Should I let him go back to his girlfriend or tell him to officially break up with her?
Q. I accidentally met a guy a year ago while coping up from a break-up. Neither has the intention to be anything to each other so we were very brutally honest about ourselves. I tell him my problems and my disinterest with meeting men, he tells me...
A. 19 July 2010: Just tell him if he really loves you then move out of his town, find a job here and then move in with you, NOW. Also say I want to get married next year and have 3 kids with you. Or else, just forget it. This is going to push him away.... (read in full...)
I've even been in therapy but cannot get over my ex
Q. Dear Readers, I was in a nine year relationship with my boyfriend. (Met in high school - dated on and off through college and after.) We had problems - mostly that he had growing up to do and put his friends before me, couldn't commit to moving...
A. 19 July 2010: What did your therapist say? Rather than torturing yourself with choice? How about just go along with whomever proposed to your first? At least the new guy had not disappointed you before. Don't worry about your ex, he could bounce back and find... (read in full...)
She won't have sex till she knows me better?
Q. Hello just a quick question, what does it mean when a girl says that she won't have sex with me untill she knows me better? does this imply she's after something deeper then just a 'one night of naughtiness?' or does it mean something else?...
A. 19 July 2010: She wants to make sure you are not just in for casual sex. She wants to know if you are compatible so you won't break up later. ... (read in full...)
He's so wonderful but he's not fulfilling my needs!
Q. So, about a year and a half ago my husband passed away in a tragic accident, I was left with three young children (FYI-I was 34 at the time). I panicked and quickly dated out of fear of the "unknown", and I wanted to put the pieces back together, so ...
A. 19 July 2010: He knows you are still grieving so he wouldn't be sexing you up until you feel joyful and confident again. He is surely not your husband, but he has qualities that are uniquely his. I am sure your husband hopes you find another boyfriend. He wants ... (read in full...)
Married, but found my soulmate
Q. i'm a 40yo man...married for 11 years with 3 beautiful children. My wife and I seem to be so far apart on so many levels and I am very unhappy. She is also an alcoholic and I'm extremely worried about the affect this will have on our kids. Now to...
A. 19 July 2010: I am sure your wife was once your soulmate too and then you wonder how it turned into this mess. If she's refusing to quit drinking and go to marital counselling then divorce her. She can't blame her problem on having 3 kids and an insensitive, ... (read in full...)
Ticking, Timebomb!
Q. Mod note: Original Title I am in a relationship that I am unsure about. Certainly I love my boyfriend but I feel very unfullfilled. I am 32 yrs old. My most desire in the past 5 yrs is to have a family, husband and a home and I don;t have neit...
A. 19 July 2010: If you married him, would your in laws be supportive of you? More often than not, when people move to Canada they stay there. Only people who complain about the cold weather and feeling lonely move back to their own country. My mom did that and ... (read in full...)
I think I chose the wrong guy! Soldier or saint?
Q. I made a mistake. I think I chose the wrong guy. When the love of my life (my best friend) asked me to be his, I said no. We've been in love for five years, we just didn't know we BOTH felt that way, and when he finally tells me his feelings of ...
A. 19 July 2010: It's not possible to not know you are in love. I prefer safe to uncertainty. The safety zone actually allows you room to try out exciting things. I don't get why you have the perfect guy with you, but still long for something you can't attain. If ... (read in full...)
Should I go ahead and tell the babies real father its his or just let it go as is?
Q. I dated a guy for almost 3 yrs. Things got rocky between us. I met someone else at college. Me and this new guy dated for about a month. I got pregnant by him. He started acting mean with me. He said he wanted to take a break. I insisted that we ...
A. 19 July 2010: You should tell him now and apologize. It's better he finds out from you than from the paternity test. Since he's your ex then there must be a reason you don't want to be with him anyway. Ask the other guy to do a paternity test so at least you can ... (read in full...)
How do people survive long distance relationships? And how can I ease my girlfriend's worries?
Q. Dear cupid, Am a Zambian and me and my girlfriend have been going out for almost two years. The thing is I will be going out for college to the US for four years. My gf is very happy for me but also worried If we will stand the test of time. Lately ...
A. 18 July 2010: Do video cam, always look happy and sincere when you talk to her. One of the signs of a cheating spouse is that they look guilty and can't look at someone in the eye when talking. Tell her you miss her. Focus on what you would like to do with her in ... (read in full...)
Condoms! We don't use them, why do you have them?
Q. Serious problem! I've been in a relationship with my guyfriend for the last three years, and during this time we have never used condoms during intimacy. A couple of weeks ago, I discovered condoms in his nightstand, and he hurriedly rushed over ...
A. 18 July 2010: I would break up with him because of his stupidity. If you are stupid enough not to cover up your tracks and be able to convince people you didn't do it after you get caught, you are too stupid and you don't qualify to be a cheater. Either that or ... (read in full...)
Condoms! We don't use them, why do you have them?
Q. Serious problem! I've been in a relationship with my guyfriend for the last three years, and during this time we have never used condoms during intimacy. A couple of weeks ago, I discovered condoms in his nightstand, and he hurriedly rushed over ...
A. 18 July 2010: If he wanted to masturbate with it or try it with you, he wouldn't have rushed to the drawer and closed it. This is not something embarrasing to admit. Renting space for his friend to have sex with a mistress is like being an advocate for cheating. ... (read in full...)
I asked my friend to have sex with me as a joke. Now what should I do if he calls me for it?
Q. I was discussing with a dear friend why his relationship is not going to the next level. He is not having sex with his girlfriend. we were sitting together and i asked him what would he do if i offer to sleep with him. He said, if u are serious ...
A. 18 July 2010: The answer you wanted was if there's sexual attraction, you got that. You don't know if there's an emotional connection. Like marriedlady said, you are going to want more than sex, and it's not a good idea to find out more about him by having sex ... (read in full...)
Can I just put it down to our relationship becoming stale...? Urgent help needed!
Q. I have seen and read many hints and tips regarding relationship issues but as we all know, all circumstances are different, this one is a real head f*ck. I've been with a girl for 4 years, I'm 12 years her senior at 38 and she is 26. She comes fr...
A. 18 July 2010: This has nothing to do with the relationship becoming stale. When two people are capable of loving, nothing goes stale. She has always been in self destructive mode and is looking for a savior. She is unhappy inside and although you prove yourself ... (read in full...)
Should I let him go back to his girlfriend or tell him to officially break up with her?
Q. I accidentally met a guy a year ago while coping up from a break-up. Neither has the intention to be anything to each other so we were very brutally honest about ourselves. I tell him my problems and my disinterest with meeting men, he tells me...
A. 17 July 2010: He had always been trying to get in your pants but nothing worked until he told you he had a girlfriend, then you fell into this trap of trying to compete for him. Whether the pictures really tell you that the girlfriend is real or not, you are ... (read in full...)
I asked my friend to have sex with me as a joke. Now what should I do if he calls me for it?
Q. I was discussing with a dear friend why his relationship is not going to the next level. He is not having sex with his girlfriend. we were sitting together and i asked him what would he do if i offer to sleep with him. He said, if u are serious ...
A. 17 July 2010: The only thing I can think about them not having sex is his girlfriend is not ready and wants to wait. She's smart, she knows something is up with him and would not give herself too easily. If he can say yes to you while still being attached, he's ... (read in full...)
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