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This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
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Should I tell my fiancée I kissed a girl at my bachelor party?
Q. Hi, one creepy loser here. I'm getting married at the end of August and had my bachelor party last weekend. To cut a long story short I got extremely drunk at the party and kissed another girl. It lasted less than a few seconds and nothing more...
A. 29 July 2011: Being drunk is no excuse. It never is. Yes, like I said, you could have done worse, but the possibility of doing worse doesn't excuse things none the less. You are responsible for your own actions, whether at a bachelor party or not.
Anywa... (read in full...)
Should I tell my fiancée I kissed a girl at my bachelor party?
Q. Hi, one creepy loser here. I'm getting married at the end of August and had my bachelor party last weekend. To cut a long story short I got extremely drunk at the party and kissed another girl. It lasted less than a few seconds and nothing more...
A. 28 July 2011: Was it a quick peck or a make-out session? Was there tongue? The way you described the kiss it sounds like a quick peck. Any idea why it happened?
Quick pecks are fine. Well, they're not supposed to happen, but it isn't the end of the world, n... (read in full...)
I get him off, but he doesn't seem like he wants to get me off. What should I do?
Q. My boyfriend, who is 21 and without any previous sexual experiences, and I (20 and having already had one sexual partner) have started becoming sexually active just within the past few weeks. I just started giving him blow jobs within the last week. ...
A. 27 July 2011: He's nervous. Give him time, but encourage him, and show him what to do. If it makes you feel uncomfortable that things are going more one way than both ways, cut down on blowjobs and whatever you do to get him off. This isn't to tease him or ... (read in full...)
Should I stop watching porn?
Q. Can anyone tell me of any reasons that they can think of as to why I shouldn't watch porn? I watch it every couple of weeks, or so - just when I'm in the mood to. But then I feel sort of guilty, like I shouldn't be watching it. Do you think I should ...
A. 27 July 2011: Why would you stop watching porn, any good reasons not to?... (read in full...)
Will he catch my genital warts?
Q. Hi me in my boyfriend had sex twice with condoms. And I have genital warts. Will he catch it, even though we use condoms ?...
A. 27 July 2011: He could catch it if his genitals have been in contact with yours before/after you had intercourse (like when you rub up against each other).
If you have genital warts you need to see your doctor for it and get treatment. ... (read in full...)
I never enjoy sex....am I doing something wrong??
Q. Dear All, Since i started having sex, i never enjoyed it,i thought maybe i was doing it with wrong people but only to find out that is the same, i started having sex by the age of 19 and now im 21,i dont know wheather im doing it in a right way or w...
A. 27 July 2011: Who are you doing it with? And what about sex do you do/what have you tried?
Yes, something is wrong, and my guess is that you haven't been in a loving relationship with these men you have had sex with, or that you aren't physically attracte... (read in full...)
I like him, and he likes me, but neither of us is ready for a relationship. So where do we go from here?
Q. So I met this guy on a online dating site and our date was just perfect and he was everything i wanted in a guy..he was staring into my eyes all night it was perfect then after our date we got the bus home and went our seperate ways..then we was ...
A. 26 July 2011: Why don't you want to be in a relationship with him? You said you didn't want it, that you aren't ready? How so?
What about you talk to him and say you'd like for the two of you to just stay cuddly, and seeing each other for a while, kisses a... (read in full...)
We're bi-sexual & in relationships, she's making advances, I just want to be friends, how do I tell her??
Q. ok so im 100% bisexual and in the past i have had as many girlfriends as i have had boyfriends. anyway im 19 and i have a boyfriend and we are very much in love. will be our 2 year anniversary in november and we already live together and do ...
A. 26 July 2011: Talk to your boyfriend? Have a trinogamous relationship?
This isn't more difficult than if it was a boy making the moves on you. If you are open for more people in the relationship then welcome her in (boyfriend needs to agree of course),... (read in full...)
I think I'm more into her than she is to me and its bothering me
Q. Good Afternoon, Couple of months ago i had posted a question on this forum and i got some great advice from folks here on site. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/do-girls-like-their-space-will-she-feel.html I have a followup question on t...
A. 26 July 2011: "I am wondering if we are bit different when it comes to our emotional needs."
I believe this is correct. People, to my experience, express their needs and desires differently. To me it is natural to reply right away, and to want to spend as much ... (read in full...)
When a man takes longer with sex, does that mean he has had sex recently??
Q. my boyfriend lives away and we see each other ever weekend, when we have sex he usely comes quick, last weekend i had sex with him and he toke longer than normal, i do trust him but i have heard that when a man takes longer it can mean they have ...
A. 26 July 2011: Not true. ... (read in full...)
Could my attraction to women be a passing thing?
Q. Hey. Okay lately i've been finding myself attracted to women. When i watch women porn it seems to turn me on. I've been hurt real bad by my ex boyfriends in the past and i just got this feeling of dating a woman. But they say a woman can hurt you ...
A. 26 July 2011: If you ever fall in love with a woman, only then do you know that you are bisexual. Until then you can call yourself bicurious, if you need a label.
Sexuality as such is always a passing thing. Some times you stick to the same thing for years, a... (read in full...)
I don't want to be somebody who is never happy with what they have....but I dream of being with another man!
Q. I just turned 30, well, geeze, I'm not sure what's really important to outline here, but here goes: I've had long relationships throughout my life with the most recent being 5 years now, but I've never made it past 6 years... maybe that's just coi...
A. 26 July 2011: My question for you is: do you love him? You might think you have what everyone wants... but do you? No one wants to settle with less. No one wants to marry a man they never truly loved. Yet again.. no one says what you want is what will make y... (read in full...)
Does sex feel the same for a man no matter what woman he's with?
Q. Not long ago I read a question asked by a man, if sex for women was different with different men. He then went on to say that sex for a man is in general the same no matter the woman he is with. So, it doesn't matter if a woman is good in bed or n...
A. 26 July 2011: *missed out on the entire point. Here I've been thinking it depends on the woman as well when this might not be true. That's all. I'd hate to think sex with a woman who loves you and is enthusiastic in bed with you is the same as sex with a ... (read in full...)
Does sex feel the same for a man no matter what woman he's with?
Q. Not long ago I read a question asked by a man, if sex for women was different with different men. He then went on to say that sex for a man is in general the same no matter the woman he is with. So, it doesn't matter if a woman is good in bed or n...
A. 26 July 2011: Yes, I always thought it was the same with men as with women, that is depends upon their partner and the connections etc, but this man in the question I linked to has me wondering if I've completely missed out. ... (read in full...)
What gives women the right to judge men for having been to prostitutes?
Q. Every time a man complains about a woman's sexual past he gets told he has no right to talk about it. But a lot of women will judge a man if they hear that he has slept with a prostitute. It's hypocrisy. If the past can't be held against one ...
A. 26 July 2011: "Every time a man complains about a woman's sexual past he gets told he has no right to talk about it. But a lot of women will judge a man if they hear that he has slept with a prostitute. It's hypocrisy. "
Not correct. Men judge. Women judge. N... (read in full...)
I have a boyfriend but am crushing on a friend. Do I act on it?
Q. So I'm in a very happy relationship with my boyfriend of 3 years. We love each other and don't ever plan to break up. However, I've had a crush on one of his friends from school for longer than I've been with my boyfriend, and it's really been ...
A. 26 July 2011: If you have no plans of breaking up with your boyfriend I better tell you what appears as obvious to anyone else: if you try to test this guy's feelings for you, or flirt with him (which is in effect what you are doing already) it WILL cause the end ... (read in full...)
How do I get the confidence back?
Q. Hi there, I am female age 30 and had quite a few sexual partners (most of these in relationships), I used to be pretty good at sex, but I had one bad experience and it really put me off and made me not want to do it for ages. The last time I did,...
A. 26 July 2011: Can you tell us more precisely what the complication was? What caused the experience to be a bad one for you? ... (read in full...)
I had my first kiss and it was horrible?
Q. Hello, I have a big problem. I have been with my bf for over a year, and its been LDR. The tension has been building between us, and he was finally able to come home. We are both inexperienced, and gave each other our first kisses. It was t...
A. 26 July 2011: Well, thats the trouble with LDR's. You run the risk of not being physically attracted to them. In this case, sounds like you aren't all that into him. Maybe you love who he is, but the chemistry between you isn't there.
You can ignore this and... (read in full...)
Any suggestions on how to get with this girl?
Q. I'm trying to get with this girl I met while me and my friends were out clubbing. She's one of my friend's friends. We've seen each other twice and both times it just ended up with us grinding on each other on the dance floor. I just don't know what ...
A. 26 July 2011: Meet up with her outside of the dancefloor. Or invite her out for a drink/food before going out clubbing next? Or just suggest to do something completely different from clubbing?
Start by asking for her number, then send her a text to start co... (read in full...)
Does he really want to take things slow relationship-wise, or does he just not want me for a relationship?
Q. About 2 weeks ago I got out of a long-term relationship. I met a man shortly after who I absolutely loved spending time with. The third day that we hung out, we had sex, and it was beautiful. But I'm falling hard for him and I want a relationship ...
A. 26 July 2011: On with the breaks!
It's been two weeks since you got out of a long term relationship? And already you want to jump into the deep with a man you barely know, but had sex with?
And, you've known him a full 6 days, and already you are attached... (read in full...)
How do I make it clear that I want him to take my virginity?
Q. I have the most lovely boyfriend and we have been dating for a while now. We can get a bit frisky when we are alone and I know that we work together. The thing is that I would like to move it to the next level and would like to do "the deed". The ...
A. 26 July 2011: "I want to have sex with you. Do me."
Then undress and get it on.
Although, I think he might be wanting to save himself for a later time, and maybe is unsure of how to tell you he wants to wait. ... (read in full...)
Is getting a nose job a good idea?
Q. I know this is a relationship website, but i really really need some advice as to what to do and how to deal with what people will think. I know i shouldn't care about others opinions but i really can't help it!! Basically, since i was about 11 i...
A. 26 July 2011: By the way... sort of had a nose job myself, haha. I broke my nose once, and it got bent to the side. So, since no one wants to walk around with a nose looking like a member of the mafia, I had it snapped back in place at the doctors.
I will war... (read in full...)
He is back in touch with the girl he cheated on his last girlfriend with, what do I do now?
Q. Hi i've been in this relationship for 10 months now and everything was going good at the start but he's changed and started to show his true colours... here is the twist he's been in care for 12 years and has been abused by everyone in his ...
A. 26 July 2011: His tragic past doesn't excuse him of any behaviour. He's cheated in the past, and this girl he cheated with should, without question, be out of his life if he wants to keep you. Take your stand and demand some respect, because he isn't respecting ... (read in full...)
Is getting a nose job a good idea?
Q. I know this is a relationship website, but i really really need some advice as to what to do and how to deal with what people will think. I know i shouldn't care about others opinions but i really can't help it!! Basically, since i was about 11 i...
A. 26 July 2011: Maybe wait until after uni and see how you feel about your nose then? Because as it is right now you are putting a time limit on yourself to make the decision, and it's only adding pressure you do not need. A decision like this one needs to be ... (read in full...)
Do women look too ?
Q. A question that will ignite a debate, we men although may have the most beautiful wife/girlfriend but we keep on looking at other women, we don't get enough! although we may be having the best woman...Are women like us in nature, do they look at men ...
A. 26 July 2011: Fancy as what? If you want us to compare notes you will have to be more specific at how exactly you look, what exactly you fancy doing with these women you look at.
My guess will still be that there's no gender separation, only a differen... (read in full...)
Not sure what to make of my ex's messages
Q. What is going on with my ex ?. We broke up in May. He broke up with me. He dumped me for a girl he spoke to online, who he has never even met !. We live in England, and she lives in America. They spoke to each other through webcam and microphones. ...
A. 25 July 2011: He sounds self pitying and like he wants attention.
Write him back saying "Thanks, my life without you is great actually, who'd have guessed?"
Or if you don't want to give him attitude: "Thank you, it really is great" or "Life is brilliant, th... (read in full...)
Cold texts but warm body language, what does this mean ladies ?
Q. Ladies help me out with this one, girls are sooooooo difficult to figure out. I used to work with this girl, every weekend. I think she likes me because she is so shy around me, makes effort to speak to me but recently has been going so red in ...
A. 25 July 2011: She sounds forgetful. If you date her don't be surprised if she shows up late, doesn't reply to texts, or "forgets" about calling you back/letting you know when to meet up. Are you prepared to take that on? Without nagging on her, and without ... (read in full...)
Do women look too ?
Q. A question that will ignite a debate, we men although may have the most beautiful wife/girlfriend but we keep on looking at other women, we don't get enough! although we may be having the best woman...Are women like us in nature, do they look at men ...
A. 25 July 2011: It's not a nature thing, is a personality thing. I think is is quite common for all people to look, we do have eyes, we're bound to observe our surroundings. So in that sense we all look. But to what degree we look variate, and that depends on the ... (read in full...)
Is sexy an attitude or a physique? Can fat women be found desirable and sexy?
Q. I have a question for the guys: Can a fat girl be sexy and desirable? Being overweight, I have always seemed to have a hard time finding a partner that was attracted to me in a healthy way. What I mean is that it seems guys tend to fall in the e...
A. 25 July 2011: Sexy is a state of mind. Being sexy means to act sexy, certain erotic signals you send out etc. Everyone can be sexy in this sense. What people are attracted to variate. I guess, you can say someone is hot, or sexy, without being attracted to the... (read in full...)
He's a virgin and I'm not
Q. Hello all! Hope you are doing well. Got a bit of a connundrum to deal with today and any help is appreciated. What does one do when they are more sexually experienced than their partner? My boyfriend is a virgin. I am not. We haven't had a se...
A. 25 July 2011: What I don't grasp is how on earth you could think to label yourself as a slut. Show self respect first and foremost. No one has a right to judge you, so you should not judge yourself. If first times were "cheap" simply because the partner wasn... (read in full...)
How long does it take for breast size to increase while on the pill?
Q. Hello all, I've been on Microgynon 30 contraceptive pill for just under a week now. I am 22 and this is the first time I've been on the pill. I went on it mainly to try and calm down my bad periods. But I am hoping I may increase my breast size a ...
A. 24 July 2011: I took Yasmin in my younger years, got pimples. Breasts stayed the same. Hair stayed the same. ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend who used to be a slut is now a prude in bed!
Q. My gf used to be a slut and was used by many men in the past as an object, which in turn lowered her self esteem even more. when i met her she was sexually open but now she has worked through her issues with self esteem is truely a bit of a prude in ...
A. 24 July 2011: Sorry Cindy, but I'm with OP here. The language changes and slut is being used more frequently to describe promoiscuous males as well. And my personal favourite being "man-whore". I think it is positive that the word evolves from the original gender ... (read in full...)
Can a relationship last without sex?
Q. I haven't had sex yet, but I always knew I was gay. I've been trying to find the right guy, but couldn't all this 10 years. Last year I met this guy and when he noticed I was always avoiding sex he got himself checked and unfortunately he's ...
A. 24 July 2011: I don't know if a relationship can last without sex... the question is more: can YOU last without sex? Do you want to always go without, your entire life without knowing how it feels to be so close and intimate to anothe person?
What is this inf... (read in full...)
Why can't a man take me further than my bed?
Q. Just because I have huge boobs, a small waist and so I have been told a pretty face, can't a man take me further than my bed????I want a partner not just sex.What is their problem or is it mine????...
A. 24 July 2011: Yours. You go for the wrong men. ... (read in full...)
Qeustions for the guys ...do you prefer bigger women ?
Q. Qeustion for the men. What do you think about bigger women ? Would you ever date one, or do you prefer smaller women, do you find bigger women attractive or do find slim women more attractive ? I ask this because well im trying to start dating and ...
A. 24 July 2011: Im bisexual, will my opinion do?
I like curvy women. They could very well be a bit on the chubby side. But with age you learn to apprechiate personality and character above how one looks in a photo. How you carry yourself, how you speak, if you'r... (read in full...)
I think I'm a pathological liar..how do I fix this?
Q. I think i might be a patholgical liar. Its not like i make up complete stories, but i constantly manipulate stories and tell lies. Like for example, this past week i was with my cousins and my one guy cousin whose close to my age saw me with my ...
A. 24 July 2011: If you want real down to earth advice on what you can actually do about this, I ownt go down into trying to analyze why you do this. Could be a need for attention/drama/you're bored, but it could be anything between heaven and earth. Whatever it is, ... (read in full...)
My family wants me to dump my BF b/c he is a Veg. How do I handle this?
Q. Dear, Cupid, My mom wants me to break up with my boyfriend because he is a vegitarian. I don't mind making meatless meals at all. I don't miss meat and he does not care if I cook and eat meat when I want to do so. It is not like he pressures ...
A. 24 July 2011: I heard vegan's or vegetarian's sperm taste better.
Just to throw that one in there, feel free to comment. ... (read in full...)
How can I squirt when I climax?
Q. I've seen porn and couldn't help but notice that some girls on there squirt while they orgasm. They squirt sometimes through the clit and sometimes through their vaginal hole. I'm still a teen and a virgin so I don't know how I can do this. I've ...
A. 24 July 2011: Nah, you can't force it. It either happens or it doesn't.... (read in full...)
I like watching gay sex but got turned off having real gay sex. So what does that mean?
Q. Ok, so i am 19 years old and confuse right now. Since i was 15, i starts watching gay porn and found myself horny and turned on everytime watching it. I also always fantasizing myself with guy when i masturbate. The problem is, i am physically at...
A. 24 July 2011: You're straight. Porn is PORN, real life is REAL LIFE.
Wwatching isn't the same as doing in this case. I watch a lot of weird porn if I can be so honest to admit, but never in a lifetime would I find the same things even remotedly attracti... (read in full...)
Affective Sexuality: Whatever happened to it?
Q. The story begins with a guy and a girl falling in love on their first date. Everything went perfect. They both click the first time they laid their eyes on each other, and they're hoping to "get it on" tonight. However, they found out that they're ...
A. 24 July 2011: No need to get offended. It is simple facts. You not having the experience does not mean you are naive, you shouldn't get offended so easily. You not having experience with sex simply means you do not have experience with sex. This is also the ... (read in full...)
My family wants me to dump my BF b/c he is a Veg. How do I handle this?
Q. Dear, Cupid, My mom wants me to break up with my boyfriend because he is a vegitarian. I don't mind making meatless meals at all. I don't miss meat and he does not care if I cook and eat meat when I want to do so. It is not like he pressures ...
A. 24 July 2011: Yes, stop worrying about what your mother tells you. She can have her opinion, fine, but you're under no obligation to do as she sees fit. You're an adult now who makes her own decisions. Stop caring what your mom thinks and tell her to lay off, or ... (read in full...)
How to deal with arrogant boosyboots women?
Q. In dealing with a man there's an obvious way of responding - the one who gets uptight and irrational loses the dispute. And ultimately, there's the implication that if you don't treat them fairly you can get hit. Lately, together with my female f...
A. 23 July 2011: Ignoring them, and the go on to do the exact opposite of what they want you to. It will bother them to no end and make them go crazy.
But ignoring them pretty much does it. It really gets to them, because they want to feel important. So if you a... (read in full...)
How long does it take for breast size to increase while on the pill?
Q. Hello all, I've been on Microgynon 30 contraceptive pill for just under a week now. I am 22 and this is the first time I've been on the pill. I went on it mainly to try and calm down my bad periods. But I am hoping I may increase my breast size a ...
A. 20 July 2011: I use Microgynon and that's the only pill that I got that side effect with... Been on others and didn't experience any difference. It is too individual, some people react to one pill, another a different one.
... (read in full...)
How long does it take for breast size to increase while on the pill?
Q. Hello all, I've been on Microgynon 30 contraceptive pill for just under a week now. I am 22 and this is the first time I've been on the pill. I went on it mainly to try and calm down my bad periods. But I am hoping I may increase my breast size a ...
A. 14 July 2011: A few months. Mine don't change a whole cup size they just swell up, so that some tops are too small, or some of the smaller bra's I sometimes can wear will be too small. I haven't payed much attention to how long it takes before I reach "full ... (read in full...)
Affective Sexuality: Whatever happened to it?
Q. The story begins with a guy and a girl falling in love on their first date. Everything went perfect. They both click the first time they laid their eyes on each other, and they're hoping to "get it on" tonight. However, they found out that they're ...
A. 16 February 2011: I do think you'd understand sex better if you weren't a virgin. It's difficult, if not impossible, to try and analyze something you have never experienced. Much like trying to analyze a movie you've never seen, or describe the flavour of a fruit ... (read in full...)
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