She is starting to make me feel unsettled! What should I do?
Q. My ex girlfriend and I have ended our 5 year relationship. We are lesbians and the breakup resulted from her lies and cheating. Anyways that was well over 6 months ago. I have not backpeddle. Shes consistently contacted me. I ignored her. I thiught ...
A. 11 December 2015: An ex is an ex for a reason. Yes in an ideal situation it would be lovely to be able to have a friendship with each other as you both have shared so much, however this is just not possible, when exes try to become friends old feelings appear and it ... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend look in porn for women who look like his ex?
Q. Why did he tell me he always looked for porn of women who looked like his ex yet when I asked him if he ever did that with me whilst we are apart ( LDR) he said he did only once . It makes me feel very unattractive to him when we can't be together ...
A. 17 October 2015: Maybe he feels that he doesn't need to look at other women that look like you. The thing with porn is it is there for people to get a quick thrill out off. You will know yourself when you are both together if he is attracted to you or not. When you ... (read in full...)
How do I best deal with this LDR? Is he too busy to have a relationship?
Q. I first met my new boyfriend this summer as he was back from university for the summer. We started off just as friends/colleagues and it turns out we both felt an instant connection. We clicked immediately. For me, I was just interested in him as a ...
A. 15 October 2015: The best thing to tell him is the truth. Truth is a big thing in a relationship. If you feel he has no time for you then you are probably right. It doesn't matter how busy he is if he really wanted to meet you then he would. It sounds to me like you ... (read in full...)
He's constantly accusing me of cheating
Q. I am absolutley fuming! My boyfriend is always accusing me of cheating, and I mean always! I put up with it because I know it's rubbish and he is just insecure. However, tonight we were supposed to go out and have a nice night out whi...
A. 10 October 2015: Generally most people who accuse their partner of cheating are in fact cheating themselves and that is why they are insecure.
First off we need to get to the bottom of why he is so insecure. Talk to him and try and get to the route of the prob... (read in full...)
Can someone please help me to stop feeling so sad and anxious about bullying at school?
Q. Every often i used to get shame because of my face. When the clock goes time to go to school, i feel upset because i have an ''afraid feeling'' of being bullied once again. Bullying makes me feel like I can't stand for being an ugly freak. Can Som...
A. 8 October 2014: I suggest that you talk to your parents about what is happening at school. It might seem that it will make it worse but believe me it wont. These bullies need to be made aware off and taught about how they are making others feel.
If you cannot go t... (read in full...)
Am I putting my own future first or am I being selfish? How can I improve?
Q. This has been happening for a long time now, and I always attributed it to a lack of confidence and trying to constantly please other people. I can be a really confident/outgoing person when I want to be, but recently, I have begun to notice things ...
A. 8 October 2014: I believe that you are not happy with who you are at the moment, you have some confidence issues and that leads to you taking out all off your frustrations on people around you.
It is good to put yourself first but also make sure you are aware of p... (read in full...)
Does he love this other girl? If he does, what should I do?
Q. i have a boyfriend ,he loves me more but he is from other start and he is my class mate too..we went to many places he care me for me more .but now one girl calling me and she use to say that he just time pass with me and she is telling that he only ...
A. 24 August 2014: You should go with your gut instinct here, if he is not making you completely happy then tell him he is being distant if he does not change then the best thing is to finish with him. You deserve the best.... (read in full...)
How do I cope being alone and pregnant while my husband is in another country?
Q. Anyone who is pregnant and alone without their baby daddy close by. Hubby is in another country and will only be back after the birth. How are you guys coping? Am 36 weeks and I feel so lonely and alone. At times I sit up in the night imagining he ...
A. 24 August 2014: I am not in the same boat. But can imagine how hard that it can be. I think that you need to try and remember that he is away to make money for you and the baby and that it will not be forever.... (read in full...)
I'm tired of being alone and would like to know how to branch out and meet someone!
Q. My school is predominately female. I feel like I have the worst social life when it comes to guys. It's not that I'm an antisocial person, I just feel like every time I meet someone they either take advantage of me or it never leads to anything ...
A. 24 August 2014: You are still young and you have plenty of time to meet someone. Just relax and keep chatting to guys and see how it goes.... (read in full...)
How do I move on?
Q. How do I move on?? I met Steven we will call him when I was 17, we have so much in common good and bad I have to admit, bit I have always been in love with him, but we could never make it work as we both had difficult childhoods both our issues k...
A. 24 August 2014: You have a sad story and my heart goes out to you, but it appears that he has moved on and you will need to do the same. There is to much sadness between you both that I am unsure that it would work. I think that you need to accept this and move on. ... (read in full...)
I feel like my mother's insensitivity is ruining our relationship
Q. Hi Aunts and Uncles. I need some help with a problem I have been having with my mother. I am 18, 5'11 and around 66kg. I've been modelling on-off for the past two years but I've always found it hard as my body type is more athletic than most ...
A. 24 August 2014: From the sounds off it you are at a perfect weight and should not be losing any more. It is hard that your mother is not more supportive, but you need to look after yourself. I am sure you will get lots of attention from people for who you are.
Y... (read in full...)
Invisible me
Q. hi everyone I don't think I am ready for taking responsibilities and making my life committed to her. That's why I don't wanna date.Focusing on my career instead.but I don't know I feel so lonely nowadays. I feel like I am gonna die alone. A...
A. 24 August 2014: I doubt you are invisible to everyone, I guess that you have chosen to live the quiet life. Everyone feels down at times. You are still young and you have plenty of time to get in to a relationship. Its good that you are focused on your career. It ... (read in full...)
I like her and everyone says she likes me but she says only as a friend. What do I do about my feelings?
Q. So for almost a year, I have gotten close with a girl where she says she doesn't like me, but everyone else that knows us says she does. We live nearby and I'm a senior and she's a sophomore. We used to talk almost everyday. She gave signals that ...
A. 24 August 2014: How are things now?... (read in full...)
Is he shy? should I bring up dating?
Q. I'm kind of baffled by this guy in my life right now. We've known each other since about the beginning of March. We hang out in a group together, usually to go eat out, see a movie, do some random activity. We talk the most when we're apart from...
A. 24 August 2014: Hi how has things developed?... (read in full...)
How do I get over this crush on my girlfriend's brother?
Q. I have asked before but it has been a while. Quick update: me and my girlfriend have been together for eight years and I have a crush on her brother. So as of now I have lots of sex dreams about him. I'm still trying to get over him. He used to show ...
A. 18 July 2014: You say you will never leave your girlfriend, so that is your answer. You are confident that she is more important than this crush. I agree it makes things worse that he is living with you so maybe you should hint to him to move out. This is a ... (read in full...)
Is it salvageable? If yes, then how do I salvage my relationship?
Q. Hi, I am a 28 years old woman, I met this guy online (he's 38), we are living in different country. I was in a relationship when he first contacted me, but only told him that when i was about to break up with my ex. After 6 months I came to ...
A. 18 July 2014: He sounds to be very insecure, this can easily happen when the relationship is long distant. I feel that you both need to spend more quality time together getting to know each other and finding out how you both get on together in the same place. I ... (read in full...)
Advice about friends and dating needed
Q. I have a few problems and I hope this isn't going to be too confusing, but I really need some help. I'm bisexual - out to only a small group of LGBTQ friends, one of which is my best friend, one of which is a friend I've fallen for. We've be...
A. 18 July 2014: There is nothing embarrassing about liking this girl, you are both bisexual therefore it wont come as a big shock if you make this confession to her. I think you should talk to her and ask her would she like to go on a date. Just simple and light ... (read in full...)
I like her and everyone says she likes me but she says only as a friend. What do I do about my feelings?
Q. So for almost a year, I have gotten close with a girl where she says she doesn't like me, but everyone else that knows us says she does. We live nearby and I'm a senior and she's a sophomore. We used to talk almost everyday. She gave signals that ...
A. 18 July 2014: The story in the book is not bringing up old feelings, you are writing it similar because you have not dealt with them old feelings, you can fool yourself that you are over her, but you are not. Yes you might have moved on more than you had at the ... (read in full...)
I have a crush on her. How do I tell her without ruining the friendship?
Q. hi am 25 theres is a woman who is 30 she sent me a friend request on facebook so i acceptd without knowin her. we both speak the same language. at first i thought myb i know her bt i realisd we dont know each other,so she stays next to my town its ...
A. 18 July 2014: Lets be honest here, you do not want a friendship with this woman, you have a crush on her you want more, so a friendship is never going to be enough for you.
The best thing that you can do is to tell her how you feel. Be honest with her, she... (read in full...)
Could you please give me some advice on how to set up a second date?
Q. Hi everyone, I met this girl at a friend's birthday party and we immediately clicked. We had very similar mindsets. I discovered she loved my country of origin and that she tried to learn my language in the past. At some point, I was telling her ...
A. 18 July 2014: Don't push her in to helping you as she will get confused as to if you actually like her or if you are playing her, so I agree with the other answer that you got, ask her out on a date, wine and dine her and tell her you are interested in getting to ... (read in full...)
Why are some women so insecure when it comes to porn?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for the last five years. We met in high school and pretty much hit it off right away. We became instantly close from then and although we have our own share of problems, porn was never one of them. We have b...
A. 18 July 2014: The biggest issue with girls is that the are insecure about themselves. Every girl has body issues, something that they hate about themselves. So I guess when a man that they are with is watching porn the first thing that jumps in to there mind is ... (read in full...)
Do I accept that my boyfriend looks at girls on the internet?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years. He treats me very well and is the love of my life. We already mention and know about being together forever. I know I am in the wrong for looking at his history in his phone. From time...
A. 18 July 2014: Nobody can tell you to accept this or not, it is really up to yourself how you move forward? I will tell you what I would do though. I love nothing more than honesty in a relationship, trust is key and you should always be honest with each other. If ... (read in full...)
Is he shy? should I bring up dating?
Q. I'm kind of baffled by this guy in my life right now. We've known each other since about the beginning of March. We hang out in a group together, usually to go eat out, see a movie, do some random activity. We talk the most when we're apart from...
A. 18 July 2014: I suggest that you just go for it, you have nothing to lose. If you like this guy then ask him out on a date. It doesn't always need to be the guy that makes the first move any more. Society has changed massively and for the better. A lot of men ... (read in full...)
His attitude has me wondering if he knew that he had herpes and didn't tell me. Do I walk away?
Q. Hi - about 12 months ago my boyfriend (who I have been with for a couple of years)was diagnosed with a condition called 'balanitis' and it has been difficult to treat. He also had genital herpes early during the diagnosis which the clinic felt may ...
A. 18 July 2014: Okay well he said in a conversation that he would not tell a new partner, however this might not be the case. We all say things and sometimes we do not truly mean them. Yes I agree it is a bad attitude to have. However in his defense I am sure this ... (read in full...)
What can I do? I have conflicting feelings about my relationship and it's scaring me.
Q. Thanks very much for taking the time to read this. I've been struggling with my conflicting feelings about my relationship, and as time goes on and I grow more and more attached to my boyfriend, my feelings just conflict more and more. I used t...
A. 18 July 2014: You got hurt at such a tender age that what you have done is you have built up a barrier. You are inside this barrier and you will not let anybody in to it, as at least then you know you are safe from getting hurt. Nobody can hurt you if you do not ... (read in full...)
In love with my English teacher but now find she likes another. How do I manage this situation?
Q. i am 14 now,in love with my english teacher. Actually i really care for her. I feel for her. Her sadness makes me sad too. Whenever i see her there are butterflies in my stomach.i stammer while talking to her.i just want her to be my best friend...
A. 18 July 2014: Hi well let me begin by telling you that this is a complete normal part of growing up and you have nothing to worry about. A lot of teenagers find that the have a crush on teachers. Teachers are there to help and guide us towards our future they are ... (read in full...)
I think he feels it too, but how do I know?
Q. I've known Mark since 1st grade...we're now 56. After school he left for college and I have not thought of him til 2 yrs ago when I got a friend request on FB from him. We started talking every few weeks for 6 months then a little more up until 9 ...
A. 3 June 2014: If he has a fear off commitment then there must be a reason and therefore getting to the bottom of that can help him move forward. I think the best thing you can do is just be straight with him and tell him the truth. Tell him you love him, tell him ... (read in full...)
Past relationships have ruined me!
Q. I'm 21 and my boyfriend is 21 as well we have been together a year and 3 months. And we have lived together for a year. We both have had a horrible past in relationships. My past relationships has ruined me completely. I was with a guy when I was 15 ...
A. 3 June 2014: You have both cheated on each other and therefore you have both broke the trust in the relationship. It takes a lot of work to trust someone after this and sometimes the trust might never come back again that's the reality of how serious this is. ... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm breaking at the seams. I want a full-time girlfriend, not one who is only able to love me and be who I need just half the time
Q. I'm in need of some help. I'm a gay female. I've been with my gf for a year and a half. It's not always been easy. She suffers from depression and I know that plays a huge role in this issue. Basically my struggle is that I never know what woman ...
A. 3 June 2014: Well you know yourself that the problem here is her depression. Depression is an illness and it is hard to live with it not only for her but also for you as well. If you can both keep talking openly about it and if you tell her how you are feeling ... (read in full...)
Does he like me, or is he just being friendly?
Q. I’ve recently met a guy who I’ve had a growing interest in. Despite him being 4 years younger me, and the fact that we come from slightly different cultures. Same religion, and he lived in the States for a while, but he’s lived in an Asian country ...
A. 3 June 2014: It is still really early days with this friendship so try and not read to much in to it. It can be hard to know if there are any romantic feelings there this early on as he may not know how to talk to you or what to say. He is showing some interest ... (read in full...)
Was this a genuine error or a ploy to get back in touch?
Q. Ok I fell out with my close male friend 8 months ago We were gonna get together but because he was going through a bad split my emotional clingy mess pushed him away Now 8 months later he's emailed me saying he 'accidentally' used my address f...
A. 3 June 2014: It does sound suspicious that he accidentally used your address. However it could have been an innocent mistake. I think the best thing to do here is just to keep things cool and see how it plays out. If he wants to get back in contact with you then ... (read in full...)
How can I even things out sexually?
Q. So I've been feeling incredibly hormonal lately. I've never felt this hormonal before but all that's on my mind for the past week has been sex. My boyfriend is lovely and is more than happy to have sex with me and does enjoy sex immensely though ...
A. 16 May 2014: I think you just need to try and gain more confidence. If you feel like you are doing all the chasing and he doesn't show that he is bothered about returning the favour then the only solution here is to talk to your boyfriend about how you feel and ... (read in full...)
My husband keeps gaining weight and I find it so unattractive!
Q. I'm married to a veteran. We moved to Asia after he got out of the army. He used to look very muscular during his serving time but now after going back to the civil world, he started gaining lots of weight. I know he loves eating and drinking pop ...
A. 16 May 2014: Talk to him about how you feel. Try to be more active together. Plan fun activities together, help him get active. Buy in healthy food and try and encourage him to eat it. As for the tattoos well they are personal preference and maybe you should ... (read in full...)
My husband keeps gaining weight and I find it so unattractive!
Q. I'm married to a veteran. We moved to Asia after he got out of the army. He used to look very muscular during his serving time but now after going back to the civil world, he started gaining lots of weight. I know he loves eating and drinking pop ...
A. 16 May 2014: Talk to him about how you feel. Try to be more active together. Plan fun activities together, help him get active. Buy in healthy food and try and encourage him to eat it. As for the tattoos well they are personal preference and maybe you should ... (read in full...)
Am I turning into a green-eyed monster?
Q. My partner and I befriended a lady on holiday last year and we became good friends, visiting and phoning frequently. This friend confided in us and was going through a very tough time in her personal life. We both tried to help her as much as w...
A. 16 May 2014: No you are not selfish in the slightest. Off course it can become a problem. Your husband calls her when you are not around probably because he knows how it makes you feel. He probably is just worried about her and wants to make sure she is okay. I ... (read in full...)
I want a girlfriend so badly!
Q. So im 14 years old and lesbian . I go to a really small school with like 12 people in my grade and none of them are gay or actually people id consider to be in a relationship with. But like. I want a girlfriend so badly and I know im young but ...
A. 8 May 2014: You have all your life to be kissing and getting in to a relationship. At your age most people go through a lonely stage where they want to be with someone it is completely normal. But I think you should abide by your parents rules and wait until ... (read in full...)
I'm struggling with my job applications, what do I do?
Q. I'm struggling to apply for this voluntary job. What should I do ?. I have to do a voluntary job soon at a Youth Club. I am on Jobseeker's Allowance. However, I am struggling to apply for it. It says on the application form that you need two ...
A. 8 May 2014: Just be as honest on the form as you can. If you only have one reference then maybe you can obtain another one. Maybe contact your old school and ask a teacher to write you one, or even a landlord ect. As for the gaps in employment well if you ... (read in full...)
Problems with boyfriend, Facebook, and other girls.
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for a year and when we first started dating he would put stuff on his facebook without me having to ask him. But now it's like a war. I feel like its not fair to me that his ex's got sweet statuses and got to be his ...
A. 30 March 2014: It is obvious from your post that you are unhappy, therefore my advice would be not to stay in a relationship if you don't feel it is right. My personal opinion about social networking is that your relationship doesn't need to be there for the world ... (read in full...)
The relationship is done but I can't bring myself to end it
Q. Thankyou for taking the time to read my question, hopefully you can help me. I've been with my boyfriend for around a year and a half and I feel like the relationship isn't working anymore. After much thought I've realised that the best thing f...
A. 30 March 2014: I know it is a scary thought being on your own and at the moment your boyfriend is your security blanket. But you have both sat down and talked about this, you both know that the relationship is not going any where but you are both scared of being ... (read in full...)
How do I just let these go and enjoy my relationship?
Q. In November last year, I had a huge fight with my boyfriend where he then went out and got drunk.. Kissed another girl and took her number. The fight had started because I snooped on him and accused him for a whole year of still having feelings for ...
A. 30 March 2014: If you are finding it difficult to cope then go back to therapy, it could also benefit you both if you went to couples therapy to work out your issues. Yes you may feel better than you once did, but the feelings are still there, and now that he has ... (read in full...)
Regaining sexual confidence after wife cheated
Q. I have a question on confidence lost for a man after my wife of 20 years cheated on me. Basically we had been together for 20 years, I was 17 when we met, she was 16. About 2 and a half years ago she cheated on me with an old friend of hers. ...
A. 30 March 2014: Cheating will do that to a person it will wreck there confidence in themselves, people don't realize the damage that they do and I am sorry that this has happened to you. You need to rebuild your life again and be happy again. It does take time to ... (read in full...)
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