Should I just start talking to him?
Q. Hi guys, basically I am 16, 17 in 24 days (i'm not counting down or anything haha) and there's this guy that i met in about january last year who is from the school opposite mine. We had a bit of a thing going on, nothing happened between us, just ...
A. 13 December 2012: He will more than likely be curious as to why you have just messaged him out of the blue, but there is no harm in sending him a message to say hello and ask him how he has been. If he asks why you are sending him a message now then just be honest ... (read in full...)
I don't know if he's wanting to date, or just hang out as friends.
Q. There's this guy that I work with that I think likes me, we're supposed to be hanging out for the second time next week and I don't know if it's a date or just friends hanging out. He doesn't work in the same area as I do, so he'd be relatively easy ...
A. 8 December 2012: I think it is pretty clear that he likes you, so the question is do you like him? If you don't then don't go out with him because he will feel like you are leading him on, but if you think that you could date him and grow to like him then go for it ... (read in full...)
How could he be over me so quickly after a seven month relationship?
Q. okay my boyfriend just broke up with me two days ago, he broke up with me three weeks ago because he wanted to find himself and needed his alone time i guess but it didnt last that long before he wanted me back cuz he regretted it immediatley and ...
A. 8 December 2012: Who said he is over you? There is nothing in that post to suggest that he is, he deleted you and your family because your relationship is over and he wants to move forward so in order to do that the best way is that there is no contact between the ... (read in full...)
Should I dump a sucker like him?
Q. Since I met my boyfriend, I have constantly been spending and spending because of him. First of all, he wanted to come and visit me in my country. Unfortunately, he had no money to pay the ticket. So, I agreed to pay the ticket including the rent. ...
A. 8 December 2012: Yes you should. He is using you and because you have feelings for him you are blind to it. My guess is that he never lost his wallet at all or that he never owed anybody anything he is bleeding you dry off money. He will keep making up excuses to ... (read in full...)
Marriage hurts and I don't know how to be a good wife. Do I stop trying to find the right man?
Q. I have been married 4 times the longest 18 years and the shortest 2weeks...I have been celibate for 3 years. What I have learned is that marriage hurts and I don't know how to be married. I know I was a good mother. But as for being a wife I didn't ...
A. 8 December 2012: Well first off it is okay to be alone, some people do prefer that, and you do not need to be in a relationship to be happy. But I feel that you have had so much bad experience with men in your life that your trust has just completely gone, you feel ... (read in full...)
Although I'm getting an abortion, hiding the pregnancy is taking its toll on me
Q. Last week I found out I was pregnant with my boyfriend's child. I'm 5 weeks in, and I've been going out with my bf for just over 9 months. I'm to say the least.... totally devastated. This was a complete accident and neither of us ever had any ...
A. 8 December 2012: I guess the depression you have been in explains a lot why you have been so upset, as long as you are sure an abortion is what you want then that is okay, I would just hate for you to regret it later on. The thing is you know yourself you are not ... (read in full...)
Although I'm getting an abortion, hiding the pregnancy is taking its toll on me
Q. Last week I found out I was pregnant with my boyfriend's child. I'm 5 weeks in, and I've been going out with my bf for just over 9 months. I'm to say the least.... totally devastated. This was a complete accident and neither of us ever had any ...
A. 8 December 2012: I know this is a difficult situation that you are in, but it is only three weeks so you need to just try and put on a brave face. Why is it that you are so emotional? If you are sure that it is an abortion that you want then that is fine, but do you ... (read in full...)
I can't tell whether or not she's interested.
Q. I have been seeing this girl for few weeks now. This past week things have got a bit heated between us in a good way, however she keeps telling me about guys she comes across or speaks to who like her but she doesnt. It always makes me wonder why ...
A. 8 December 2012: Yeah I think she is interested, am guessing she tells you about these other guys for a reaction from you. She sounds like she is a little insecure so she uses these guys to see if you react to them, plus she probably wants you to see that she is not ... (read in full...)
How can I avoid becoming one of her punching bags at work?
Q. What makes some people fly off the handle so quickly? There is this woman at work. I have heard her get so aggressive so quickly at work. She acts like she has to fight so fiercely over issues that are nothing more than day to day things. So far I ...
A. 8 December 2012: This woman just sounds awful to work with. I guess there is always someone at work who we fear we will get on the wrong side off. There really is nothing that you can do but do your job the best that you can, if it comes to it and she does fly off ... (read in full...)
Should I try to develop a relationship with her? I don't want to cause an office drama
Q. I am madly infatuated with my female coworker. Sometimes, I get the impression that she is just a player. She is my office girl, who helps out with my paperwork. I had asked her out for lunch once before, and she said her car had to go in for repa...
A. 8 December 2012: From your post it sounds to me like there is an interest there am just not sure how much she is interested or just what she is interested in! I think the best thing to do is to be clear with her and truthful. Ask her out on a date and tell her how ... (read in full...)
Help me settle our artistic differences!
Q. Hey DearCupid! I don't know if it's a problem as such, more a question of tact. My partner and I are quite musical but the trouble is we have two different specialities - his is folk and mine is classical. He strums, and I sing. We formed a two-...
A. 6 December 2012: The only way you can explain to him is to tell him the truth, if you do not have his support do to it with him then practice on your own separately. It might just be a case that this is his escape and something that he likes to do alone, and if that ... (read in full...)
Does she blame me or is there something else wrong?
Q. My girlfriend and myself share two daughters. Our first is 26 months and our second is 4 months old. My girlfriend had a bad time of it having our youngest and she needed help giving birth as she wasnt feeling right after 29 hours in labour. Both ...
A. 6 December 2012: There could be lots off different things wrong which are making her feel like this. But you have a right to be concerned if she is not showing any affection at all. It could be because she had a horrific birth she does not feel sexy any more. Maybe ... (read in full...)
How do I move on from a relationship that has totally consumed me?
Q. Okay, this is sort of a long story but to make it sort of short the important details are that I'm in my mid-20s (my ex boyfriend is 29), both our Mom's are/were suffering from advanced stage cancer but mine recently passed away, and we've been ...
A. 6 December 2012: It is not worth salvaging believe me. He never thought about you when he was having sex with these other women, he didn't care that you where going through a hard time or that you had a medical condition, in fact what he done was worse he put your ... (read in full...)
Would it be so wrong if my wife's (we're separated) sister in law and I get together once in a while to enjoy sex as friends?
Q. I'm separated, my wife's brother separated from his wife. At this point neither 1 of us have any faith in our liars, cheaters and drunks and have no plans to go back. We are both sexually attracted, but we don't want to wind up in a relationship ...
A. 6 December 2012: I honestly don't see this ever being a good idea. You might not see anything wrong with it because you are missing having a physical relationship with someone and you feel close to this woman but there are so many things to think about here. For a ... (read in full...)
Dating a guy who's 8 years my senior
Q. Is it illegal to date someone who's 8 years my senior in California?...
A. 6 December 2012: As long as you are both consenting adults then it is not illegal at all. ... (read in full...)
Should I ask her out or forget about her?
Q. I have this woman I've know since grade school as a distant friend. She married another distant friend and after 15 years, she had to divorce for a few good reasons, his drinking heavily was one of them. I am separated from my wife for over 3 years ...
A. 6 December 2012: You are both single and both adults therefore I don't see that you are doing anything wrong. If this guy was a close friend of yours, someone who you spent time with then I would say that it would be a bad idea, but you say he is not so you have ... (read in full...)
How long before you know you're in love and he/she is "the one"?
Q. If you have been in a good relationship for over two years, is that enough time to know whether or not you are "in love" with someone? Is that enough time to know whether or not this person is "the one?" ...
A. 6 December 2012: Everybody is different and it takes everybody different lengths of time to fall in love or to know that they have found someone they want to spend there life with. Now looking at your case personally I think 2 years in a serious relationship should ... (read in full...)
How can I get over these feelings for my ex and learn to trust again?
Q. I am very confused right now. I just got out of a 3 year relationship in college with someone I still unfortunately love. This has just been a very terrible year for me. By far worst year of my life. I am a biochemistry major in college. It all ...
A. 6 December 2012: You are not an idiot and you never saw it happening because you where preoccupied by helping out your parents, so don't beat yourself up or blame yourself, this was all her own doing and she was completely in the wrong. You are much better off ... (read in full...)
I have liked this woman for three years. She has a boyfriend but I think she likes me. What should I do?
Q. Hi, i cant stop thinking about a women at my work we used to work together, and hang out at tea breaks etc. She has a boyfriend. When I told her I liked her she said she's happy, but one week later asked me out for a drink as friends went out...
A. 6 December 2012: It sounds to me like she enjoyed the attention that you gave her. She knew you liked her so she played on that, then probably realised that it was not worth it or not fair on you. She has a boyfriend you need to accept that if she wanted to be with ... (read in full...)
If you were single for a while and somehow got out of the dry spell, how did you do it?
Q. I've been single for 3 years and consider myself a good catch. For the first two years of that period, I wasn't actively looking. I'd go to clubs every now and then, and I'd also keep up-to-date with my female friends, but nothing every materialized ...
A. 6 December 2012: It is hard getting back in to the dating scene and sometimes it can take time and patience. I know for you right now it probably seems like it is not working out at all, but the thing is you are trying and you are open to new ideas so I guess for ... (read in full...)
He's Flirting With Random Strangers Without Me Knowing. How Should I address this?
Q. Ok, we have been together for awhile.. About 11 months. I'm really irritated with this: I was looking through my boyfriend's messages (he does the same to me too) and I saw a message he wrote to a girl, (Ex Gf actually, but I don't mind)...
A. 5 December 2012: You need to just be honest with him and you should have been the moment you read the message. You say you both check each others phones therefore you should have told him straight away as you where not doing anything wrong if it is what you both do. ... (read in full...)
I see him every day but he only texts me once. Am I asking too much?
Q. I'm 43 and have fallen madly in love with this man. He and I have amaizing chemistry and sex. When we are together things are perfect. We get along, joke, play, talk. He is affectionate and loving. The problem lies when we are apart. He calls me ...
A. 5 December 2012: Let me get this straight, he calls you daily around three, you spend every single night together and you feel that he is not giving you enough? I honestly think you are expecting way to much here. You are getting much more than most people in ... (read in full...)
She lost her trust in me. Do I keep trying to get it back?
Q. I was seeing this girl for 3 months and we fell in love really quickly. For some stupid reason I started suspecting that she was seeing someone else at the same time so I cut all contact with her for 3 weeks because I was afraid of getting hurt. ...
A. 5 December 2012: Well have you explained to her exactly why you done what you did? A lack off communication can cause all types of confusion. You hurt her and she probably does not want to put herself in that situation again. I don't understand how you know she has ... (read in full...)
Questions about glasses and contacts
Q. hi, im annoyed with glasses, in gym i when i get hit in the face with a ball my nose gets dented and hurts because of my glasses, i could take them off but i get a headace after a while. Everyone says i look really pretty without glasses, and that ...
A. 5 December 2012: You are still very young so I think the first step that you should take is to talk to your parents and explain to them how you are feeling. Also when it comes to someone saying you would look pretty with a different colour of eyes, it is only there ... (read in full...)
I was there for my friend but he has consistently bailed out on me now 5 months in a row!
Q. Hi aunts! So, I have a great friend. We have been really close for years. He is gay, I'm not. Last year he has ben through something really really traumatic (his boyfriend killed himself). I have done everything in my power to be the most supportive ...
A. 5 December 2012: You done the right thing by telling him how you feel. You where there for him and it shows who your real friends are when you need someone or support. I guess the ball is in his court now so I would leave it up to him to reply. My guess is that you ... (read in full...)
The date went really well, we agreed to meet again, but he seems uninterested?
Q. Dear cupid, Im 20. Single (always have been), quite inexperienced, only dated one guy in the past properly and it ended horribly, but I've never actually been in a relationship before. So I met this guy through my friend, (he's 20 and he know'...
A. 5 December 2012: Hi well I think I have already responded to your question as you have already posted it, but I thought I would reply again as this post is a bit more up to date than the last one. I think the best thing for you to do at the moment is not to over ... (read in full...)
Should I just start talking to him?
Q. Hi guys, basically I am 16, 17 in 24 days (i'm not counting down or anything haha) and there's this guy that i met in about january last year who is from the school opposite mine. We had a bit of a thing going on, nothing happened between us, just ...
A. 5 December 2012: I guess you lack some confidence and self esteem, it is quite normal to get scared when someone tells you they like you and you are not sure what to do or say. My guess is you have never experienced something like this, so you are unsure how to act. ... (read in full...)
Should I pursue what is almost certainly the same dead end, or should I cut my losses and move on?
Q. shit... where do i start. well, long-time listener, first-time caller. had (and divulged) a long-time crush on 2 of my friends... didn't go so well. we didn't see each other for a few months after that, but kept the door open to remain friends. and ...
A. 5 December 2012: I can understand why you moved in with them, I guess you knew deep down that it would be a bad idea to move in with them, yet you could not resist temptation either. I think you know that once bitten twice shy. Really is there much point in trying a ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants to reconnect, on a friendship level, with the ex who hurt her. I don't know how to feel about this.
Q. Here's my situation. Just over a year and a half ago, I started dating an incredible girl. We get along great. Our relationship is everything I could ever want in every way. We have made it clear to each other that we want to get married once we're ...
A. 5 December 2012: If it was me that was in your shoes I would be feeling the exact same way. I understand that maybe she was curious and had a few questions for him, but she has got them now and that should be the end of it. I do not see why she would want to be ... (read in full...)
How can I make friends? I get nervous when I talk to people..
Q. hi guys, i need advice on how to make friends? i get nervous easily and when i speak to people i just sort of mumble or get confused with what im trying to say. i dont really have a lot of confidence. not only that but i am currently une...
A. 5 December 2012: Well going to the gym is good on its own as it gets you out of the house and motivated. I guess the best place to start is to maybe join some classes or groups. Think off hobbies that you like or something that you would like to try and do, ... (read in full...)
Are the disabled unlovable?
Q. How does anyone get a girlfriend? I'm 24, almost 25, and every woman I ask out rejects me. I've tried over and over again. I use a wheelchair, but I'm finishing a degree in Web design/development to start a career in Web design and my specific ...
A. 5 December 2012: No off course the disabled are not unlovable. My guess is that you are just approaching the wrong girls for you. Maybe you should start of by getting to know a girl as a friend and let them get to know you before you ask them out. Maybe some off ... (read in full...)
I asked my ex girlfriend if she's dating someone else. What does her answer mean?
Q. I asked my ex girlfriend if she is dating someone and her answer was "I'm not going to answer that". I've been told that she means it is none of mine business. But is she still interested in me?...
A. 5 December 2012: There is nothing in what you wrote to suggest that she is still interested. You need to talk to her about that. But my guess is she never answered you because it is her personal life and you are her ex so yeah she probably thought it was none of ... (read in full...)
Have I let myself down, or do others expect too much of me?
Q. Hello, I've been having a lot of trouble lately and I keep making things worse for myself. I'm 15 years old and I've been predicted very high target grades and gcses, and people expect me to use my intelligence to the maximum, but lately I feel as ...
A. 5 December 2012: I think you are putting way to much pressure on yourself. As for wanting to impress your parents, you should work hard for yourself and nobody else. I think it would benefit you to sit down with your parents, talk to them and tell them how you have ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my wife a few weeks before we got married and now I am constantly worried she will find out.
Q. I cheated on my wife a few weeks before we got married and now I am constantly worried she will find out. Im not proud of myself and would change it if I could but I cant. I didn't have sex with this other women, she gave me a handjob on my stag ...
A. 5 December 2012: I think the best thing for you to do is to tell her. I cannot say if she will forgive you or not, but she deserves to know the truth plus you will feel much better for getting it off your chest. You will need to work hard and prove to her that you ... (read in full...)
I'm falling for my taken friend. how do I stop myself?
Q. Hey, first time here, although I have read the site abit searching for cases similar to mine. Some background information on what basically lead to the situation I'm in. It's about my friend. I'm an introvert, and while not to extremes (I talk...
A. 5 December 2012: There really is not a lot you can do here. You let this girl in and trusted her and now you are falling for her, it is a very dangerous path to go down. Please do not go looking to moving closer to her, you both need distance between each other at ... (read in full...)
Does my ex boyfriends friend like me?
Q. Boyfriend broke up with me by just ignoring me. That was 3 weeks ago. He has a lot of friend who work at a store near my house, I went and one of his friends came up to me and asked me how I was and what happened. So I told him and his friend w...
A. 5 December 2012: I am not sure if he does or not, I think he feels bad about the way his friend has treated you and he thinks you are a nice girl but am really not sure if there is anything more to it. Also I don't think you should go after an ex's friend. Even ... (read in full...)
Should I join a dating site?
Q. im almost 25 yr and still well inexperience in the romance department. Til recently i really didnt have much of problem with. If fact i was glad to single, i love the single life. Go out dancing or having coffee with me girls. Notice some eye candy ...
A. 5 December 2012: I think you should give it a go, there is nothing to lose right? Plus if you get bored or lonely at least you are talking to people. Yes off course it is not the same as socializing but you might make a few friends from it if nothing else. Yes I ... (read in full...)
What do I do about this guy I really like him:?
Q. What do I do about this guy I really like him:(? I've been single for 2years. My ex boyfriend cheated, lied to me and dumped me. He really broke my heart cause he's the only guy I've felt so strongly for. I lost my self esteem. I use to be so b...
A. 5 December 2012: It is good to hear you are getting your confidence back and you are beginning to feel good about yourself again. I am unsure what his reasons are for not communicating with you like he does the others, but maybe he just knows them better. However ... (read in full...)
Is it too much to ask to have my boyfriend with me when I am depressed?
Q. Dear Cupid I have few problems cause of my childhood issues. I go into depression once in a while, most of the time I won't show it to my bf. I just act normally, I'm seeing a psychatraist and taking medicine for it. 2 days back I went into s...
A. 5 December 2012: I am also sorry to hear that. Is your sister still there with you? Make an appointment with your doctor and seek his advice. He does not understand depression at all and he thinks you are just being clingy and needy, when off course it is not, he ... (read in full...)
Is it too much to ask to have my boyfriend with me when I am depressed?
Q. Dear Cupid I have few problems cause of my childhood issues. I go into depression once in a while, most of the time I won't show it to my bf. I just act normally, I'm seeing a psychatraist and taking medicine for it. 2 days back I went into s...
A. 4 December 2012: It's not that you are not worth the trouble and you should not take it as a personal attack because he did not stay there. It is probably more to do with the fact that depression causes problem for all people involved. It was probably very difficult ... (read in full...)
My best friend tried to kiss me, I'm in shock, help me?
Q. Lets call her Jo. SCENARIO: Jo and I have been best friends for a very long time. We are so close, we have the exact same sense of humor and we tell each other everything...until now. I've told her many, many secrets, which, in the dealing o...
A. 4 December 2012: You have turned to your teacher now who has got the head teacher involved, therefore I think you need to be honest with your parents and tell them what happened. Okay so she never kissed you and she probably felt she was not doing anything wrong as ... (read in full...)
I can't stop thinking about a teacher I used to have a crush on. How can I forget him and move on?
Q. So I'm 19, in my second year of university and in a succesful and happy long term relationship. However, I cannot seem to forget about the teacher I had a massive crush (I used to think it was love but now I'm a little older I'm not so sure) on from ...
A. 4 December 2012: It probably does feel to you like unfinished business, in your head you are probably thinking what if, or what could have been. I doubt emailing him will help, it will probably just confuse you even more. I think in time you will soon forget about ... (read in full...)
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