I'm in love with a married man who is in an unhappy marriage! What should I do?
Q. Ok so there's this guy. I've known him for about ten years, infact even longer than his wife. He's actually a family friend and all we have ever been is friends. However about 7 months ago after me, his wife and him went out for some drinks, we went ...
A. 27 November 2009: Good for you love!! Be strong, I know it's hard. I'm really proud of you, and we are here for you if you ever need to talk. ... (read in full...)
Should I let my daughter visit her father for a week?
Q. Ok, my daughter's father and I have been broken up for about a year now. Since the holidays are coming up I decided to put all of our differences aside and let my daughter go back home with him.(Recently moved out of state) Now she has never been ...
A. 25 November 2009: hang on... I'm confused. What violence around are you refering to? also, you've been broken up for a year but he doesn't have regular visits with his child that last more than a day? ... (read in full...)
I don't understand why would she block me and stop talking to me when she told me she would give me one more chance?
Q. I need to know if my ex still has feelings for me and that she has blocked me out her life. We broke up 8 months ago and went out for 6 months but she live down south now. anyway it all started when we had an argument 1 month ago cause she told me ...
A. 25 November 2009: Sounds like she was really upset when she found out you had a girlfriend. Back off, let her cool down and maybe you can try calling her in time. MSN and Facebook are too removed. Phone call is better. ... (read in full...)
Have any experience with past lifes?
Q. Does anybody believe or have any experience here with past life's? When me and my husband meet many years ago, we had a feeling, like Déjà vu. And we both thought we are one person, like other half.. and it is not just romantically, but really ...
A. 25 November 2009: why would it be risky? Go to the library and get some books. ... (read in full...)
Good guy or bad guy?
Q. I'm 38 and still so so confused! A lot of relationship/dating advice I have seen, says "Be the bad boy, dont be a wuss" So now what? Leave it a few hours before answering her text messages etc? She seems to be pulling away from me, of course I ...
A. 25 November 2009: Just be yourself. Nobody wants to play games, and if you are being yourself and she's losing interest, then she's not the girl for you. If she's pulling away then take the hint and give her some space. The worst thing you can do is pressure her and ... (read in full...)
Please help me, he likes me one day.. then hates me the next.
Q. PLEASE HELP ME! I cannot let this go and need your help! There is this boy and i have liked him over a year now. Im only 13 but I actually feel in love with him. On some days, he seems really interested in me and I feel like we are getting somewher...
A. 25 November 2009: sounds like teasing him isn't making him laugh. Maybe try laying off the teasing and see if he doesn't disapear as often. ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with a married man who is in an unhappy marriage! What should I do?
Q. Ok so there's this guy. I've known him for about ten years, infact even longer than his wife. He's actually a family friend and all we have ever been is friends. However about 7 months ago after me, his wife and him went out for some drinks, we went ...
A. 25 November 2009: Hi darlin,
You ask really good questions. From what I have learned in my years (I'm 38) I have seen this strange dynamic sometimes... that really good, kind hearted people seem to attract really difficult troubled people. And for reasons no one c... (read in full...)
I'm in love with a married man who is in an unhappy marriage! What should I do?
Q. Ok so there's this guy. I've known him for about ten years, infact even longer than his wife. He's actually a family friend and all we have ever been is friends. However about 7 months ago after me, his wife and him went out for some drinks, we went ...
A. 24 November 2009: Oh honey. I'm with KC100. Don't romanticize this guy. You are young so please listen to your aunts who have more life experience. Read the other posts by women in your position on here, they say the SAME thing. He's so NICE he doesn't want to HURT ... (read in full...)
Phone sex making fiance sleepy... am I just a sexual relationship?
Q. Why is it that every time after we have phone sex my fiance gets very sleepy afterwards. I mean well have phone sex a couple times a day sometimes, then shortly afterwards, he's over there snoozing. Am I the only one that this happens to. When he ...
A. 20 November 2009: Men usually fall asleep after sex... phone or otherwise. If he's your fiance, then he's planning to marry you and build a whole life with you - right? So not just a sexual relationship. However, if every time he calls all he wants to do is have ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to think sex is disgusting?
Q. I am 33 yrs old and could care less if I had sex again!! It's gross, and disgusting I have to be drunk to have sex with my husband. Is that normal, and how do you think I should handle it?...
A. 20 November 2009: Whoa... ummm no I don't think that's normal. Sex with your husband should be a beautiful, loving exchange of intimacy and pleasure that builds closeness and brings deep satisfaction. Unless of course your husband is a perverted troll... but if that ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend dated celebrities and I'm not sure what to make of it
Q. I met my girlfriend 5 months ago in a nightclub through a friend. We got chatting and after an hour I got her number and arranged to meet her at her place to watch a movie. I was busy with work and didnt call. I saw her in the same club a week later ...
A. 20 November 2009: Hmmmm. Well first of all, I think 4 months is WAY TOO SOON to be talking about marriage or even living together. Give your relationship a year before you seriously consider those things.
Second. Dating/sleeping with a lot of celebrities speaks t... (read in full...)
Fifteen and I want a baby now! Mature advice needed.
Q. Please help. I'm quite mature, and I have support from my family and friends. I've always wanted a baby, since I have hit puberty, I think of what it would be like, and how hard it'd be but at the same time how wonderful it'd be. I know it costs a ...
A. 20 November 2009: With maturity comes patience. What is your rush? Can I ask you WHY you want/need to have a baby right now, when you have your whole life ahead of you?
Sure, having a child and a family can be a very fulfilling life goal. But life goals aren't a... (read in full...)
Ex still wants sexual favors... WHY?
Q. my bf and I live together but have just recently broken up. He asks me for hand-jobs, why? We are broken up but he asks me for hand jobs and also asked me if I still want something from him. I said I don't want anything sexual from him because we ...
A. 20 November 2009: Because men are dogs like that. He's horny and you are there. Tell him to get lost. ... (read in full...)
My husband claims he will change if I go back to him but I don't trust his word!
Q. I left my husband, we were working together on cruises, saved money to build a future together for 5 years, I am from latin america he is eastern european, first of all he choose living in his country, despite i suggested a neutral country, after I ...
A. 20 November 2009: Hi HIT you??? several times??? He FORBADE you to have access to your own money or to visit your family???
WHY would you even consider going back to someone who treated you like that? HELL NO. This guy is a supreme control freak. He promises... (read in full...)
How can I explain this to him so we end on good terms?
Q. I met my ex boyfriend through work although i didn't want to start anything in the beginning because i had just broken up with someone and he lived a very long way away from me. After around 6-9 months we started talking every day on the phone, ...
A. 20 November 2009: Sounds like that Kim Wilde song 'you keep me hangin' on' -- "And now that you've got your freedom you want to still hold onto me... you don't want me for yourself, so let me find somebody else"
This guy is a piece of work... he wants his cake... (read in full...)
How do you forget the person you are in love with?
Q. Hi to all. Anybody who can give some effective tips on how to forget a person whom you love so much that you can't live without him. I am waiting for your tips. Thank you....
A. 20 November 2009: Time. Staying busy. Loving yourself. Flirting. Forgiveness.
Also what sometimes works for me... schedule time to grieve your loss. Allow yourself a specific time (hour or so) each day to remember, cry, listen to music, etc. but then the rest of ... (read in full...)
He doesn't show any emotions even though we are on a break! Do you think he loves me or is he just hiding his emotions to appear "manly"?
Q. My boyfriend and I are on a break. I've been sad, but he doesn't feel any emotions at all. He's broken up with me at least four times, and each time he wasn't coming back. Each time he told me he doesn't love me anymore, but in the end, he come...
A. 20 November 2009: No honey you can't keep taking this pain. This man is not hiding his emotions, he doesn't have any. He said as much when he said he couldn't say he loves you. He said as much when he broke up with you 4 times. I don't know what makes him keep coming ... (read in full...)
He just wont touch, kiss or hold me...and we've only been married 46 days!
Q. Hi. I've been married for just under 2 months, been with him 5 years. We're both 25. Lived together for 3 years. In the past 2 years, our sex life has diminished drastically. Mind you, in the past two years, he's been in University doing a ...
A. 20 November 2009: Hi sweetie,
I'm so sorry you are going through this. As a woman I understand how hard it is on your esteem when the man you love doesn't want you. But based on what you said in your note, I really don't think it's ABOUT you. Two people can love... (read in full...)
My mother is a compulsive hoarder!
Q. My mother is a compulsive hoarder. She has been for as long as I can possibly remember, and once my father left it took over everything. I remember rushing to clean my house on my tenth birthday, so the friends I had invited over wouldn't see how ...
A. 20 November 2009: I think you need to sit down with your mom and say "mom. I love you. You have a problem that is really impacting our lives and our relationship. We need to tackle this.". Then outline a 3 step process.
1. you need to work together to clean up... (read in full...)
I need advice on my cheating girlfriend!
Q. Hey guys im rather upset about this but just wanted some constructive feedback and others opinions on it. last night my girlfriend of 4 years went to her male friends house and just them two were drinking until they were completely wasted and he...
A. 20 November 2009: It sounds like your girl likes to party and makes bad decisions when she's been drinking. It's a good sign that she tells you... but not a great sign that she's getting so incapacitated she doesn't really know what she's doing. The hanging out with ... (read in full...)
She does not understand why I am upset. Should I be upset?
Q. My wife slept with my best friend, no sex, no touching. I was not present. The sleeping accommodation was not the best. First nite she called me and told me he invited her to the bed, there was only one. She was cramped where she slept. She told me ...
A. 30 October 2009: Well, I'm still a bit confused why 1) you would leave your wife alone at your sons house and go home, knowing there was nowhere for her to sleep there, and 2) If you live that close why she wouldn't just come home after the "event"... or 3) if you ... (read in full...)
Is he jealous?
Q. I told the guy I am dating that I will go to a party and asked him if he could help me by giving me his opinion about the hairstyle. He acccepted. I thought he will ask me something about the party, but he did not. The only thing he knows that I ...
A. 30 October 2009: He's probably wondering the same as you - why are you telling him you are going to a party and asking about hairstyles but you didn't invite HIM to go with you? He's wondering maybe if you have another boyfriend. Sounds like you are giving him mixed ... (read in full...)
Did I cheat on my boyfriend, and if so does that mean I'm not happy with him?
Q. I'm very much in love with my boyfriend, we've been together for 7 months and it feels very right, like I've found my soul mate. I've been through enough abusive/controlling/violent and generally unhappy relationships to know that I'm definitely ...
A. 30 October 2009: I'd be cautious of this new guy. He says he's in love with his ex... then one dance with you and he's not in love with HER anymore, now he's all goo goo over you? He only ever has sex with people he loves? Sounds to me like he "falls in LOVE" ... (read in full...)
Help! Is he leading me on, or does he want to date me?
Q. Hey guys, I have been talking to this guy for a week or so through the internet, we met through a social event so its not an online thing. The other day he asked me for my number because he was asking me about going to the movies together. I gav...
A. 30 October 2009: Lean back and let him come to you. Trust me, if a guy is interested, even if you don't respond he will try again. Be careful with text, it means nothing to guys. Let him come to you, and don't be so quick to respond. If he makes you wait two ... (read in full...)
Should I even try to begin to understand??
Q. Hi, Don't know if anyone else can get their head around this because I can't... I was going out with a girl for 7 years. We got on so well, really knew each other, and had got to the stage that we could openly talk about anything. She even br...
A. 25 September 2009: Wow. You must be very hurt and very heartbroken. No I don't think you should try to understand - not now anyway. I think you should take care of yourself. Her obsession is her problem. Let her friends and family "step in". She will tire of this ... (read in full...)
How do I dump him gracefully? Ignore him or tell him straight?
Q. Hi, I posted this yesterday and got 2 replies I am so thankful for. But I need more advise from our dear aunts. I am still confused... How should I turn down my ex without with grace? Here's the background. I have realized now he has played ...
A. 25 September 2009: That's lovely that you don't want to hurt anyone, but darlin' you don't want to be a doormat either. Sometimes treating people the way they treated you isn't a bad thing... it might give them a clue to how they have made you feel.
I think pe... (read in full...)
Did she just use me sexually and will she ever come back to me?
Q. I know this is a long post, but I feel all the information in it is necessary. A year ago in August, I started my second year of college. It was at this time I met her. I had known her from when I was in elementary and middle school-she was a gr...
A. 24 September 2009: I'm sorry, that's a really heartbreaking story. As an objective reader though, do you really want to be with a girl who cheats on her boyfriend? and then runs off with another guy right after you? sounds like she has some issues and she's a bit ... (read in full...)
Should I risk our friendship by asking her out?
Q. Hi there, Okay, so... I've been friends, really good friends with this chick going on 4 years. I've liked her in the past, at the beginning, for about a year, asked her out... no dice. I got over her, and had a relapse. I've like her for th...
A. 24 September 2009: you say you two are really good friends? I'd ask her for advice on your situation. Tell her what you told us. As her what she thinks you should do. Then do what she says. :-)... (read in full...)
He's never been good at relationships but what is your opinion?
Q. Ive known this guy for 4-5 yrs - Lets call him "Robert".We were friends and some point jumped into intimacy. He was a drinker who expressed his naughty feelings for me and would be touchy feely in public,get jealous when I was w/ other guys.We ...
A. 24 September 2009: Hi honey. This guy clearly has intimacy issues. I don't know many men who hang with a woman for 5 years, say I love you and don't mean it. So I think he def has feelings for you. But having feelings and being able to deal with his issues well enough ... (read in full...)
I want to be friends with a married man but he has feelings for me!
Q. Hey guys, This problem is to do with a guy who previously ran a community music group in my area. We get along really well, he's married. I wasn't really interested in a romantic relationship at all, he's just cool and we like hanging. I should m...
A. 23 September 2009: I'm glad to hear it freaked you out -- that's your inner wisdom warning you something is wrong here. You are 19, so you probably don't have much experience with married couples. Let me enlighten you. NO you can't just be friends with a married man - ... (read in full...)
Am I reading this all wrong or does he like me?
Q. Ok, What would you think if a guy you liked told you this... 1. That he really, really liked me a lot. 2. That not many people 'get' him, but I do. 3. That he feels he can talk to me about anything. 4. Flirts, and accidentally drops in sexual...
A. 23 September 2009: There's a great quote.... in romance, don't listen to anything a man says, only what he does. some men are huge flirts. Is he asking you out? taking you out? taking you in his arms and saying "darling be mine"? or is it all just talk?... (read in full...)
A little help for the guy stuck in the friend zone
Q. I'm a guy that always has girl-friends but never in a relationship I'm starting to believe I'm every girls straight gay friend you know. I can talk to a girl for weeks or months and go slow find out more about them and try to show them that I'm ...
A. 23 September 2009: Based on what you said, "I talk to a girl for weeks or months and go slow and find out more about them but I want to make sure it will work first" -- that comes across as you aren't COURTING these girls, you are the one setting the relationship up ... (read in full...)
Out of no where he ended things because he said he's too busy for a relationship, could there be more to this?
Q. Hi, about a month ago I started dating this guy, we've been friends for about 5 years. He is at uni and i am studying part time while working.... He broke up with me yesterday. He said that he has so much work to do and is under a lot of pressure ...
A. 17 August 2009: I know. They give us all the right signals... we think everything is fine... and then they just totally pull a 180...and don't even explain why. It's NOT fair, it's not right, and it's confusing as hell. I've had it happen to me. Seen it happen to ... (read in full...)
I lost my virginity to my now ex-boyfriend, but according to him I wasn't a virgin before him! What do you make of this?
Q. I had my 1st sex last year when I was 20 wid my ex-boyfriend. But according to him, I was not virgin. I actually didn't understand what he meant. As according to him, I didnt suffer any pain much, and everything went so smooth. I got a lil confused ...
A. 16 August 2009: YOU KNOW who you lost your virginity to and when. Who cares if your ex agrees or not? Why is this even bothering you? You know the truth. ... (read in full...)
I'm attracted to my wife's best friend and curious of what it's like to sleep with another woman! What should I do?
Q. I have been married to my wife for 11 years now and she has been the only woman I have ever had sex with. For about 9 of those years she has had a lot of issues physcially and mentally that has caused her to totally lose her sex drive. For the most ...
A. 16 August 2009: Oh dude... please. Surf around here and read all the agony posts of women who's husbands are cheating... of mistresses who are heartbroken that they are involved with married men... even of married men who are in hell. Seriously - read those so you ... (read in full...)
We've just moved in together and it's me that's doing all the work! I can't move out, so what should I do?
Q. Hi, I just wondered if anyone has any advice...I've just moved in with my boyf, but we have been together three years. He doesnt do anything around the house. No cooking, cleaning, Nothing!!! I lend him my car to take to work every day, which cuts ...
A. 16 August 2009: Can you find a roommate? you need to kick this bum out. Seriously. and DEFINITELY STOP lending him your car, cooking for him or doing anything for him! Ugh!! ... (read in full...)
Am I part of the reason why he's hurting?
Q. Say a guy turns 40 and soon after, his 29 year old girlfriend of 6 years dumps him unceremoniously for a 20 year old. I know that's going to hurt, badly, but I'm wondering how I fit into it: I'm a very attractive (not to toot my own horn, but I get ...
A. 16 August 2009: It sounds like you are asking if you are the rebound girl. Well, maybe. But why would you be part of the reason why he's hurting? that doesn't make sense. Because you are young and remind him of his ex? I don't think so. If you have been dating for ... (read in full...)
Out of no where he ended things because he said he's too busy for a relationship, could there be more to this?
Q. Hi, about a month ago I started dating this guy, we've been friends for about 5 years. He is at uni and i am studying part time while working.... He broke up with me yesterday. He said that he has so much work to do and is under a lot of pressure ...
A. 16 August 2009: Okay first of all he's talking about moving in together after only dating a month? Seems a bit fast. When you said great! that might have freaked him out a bit. Guys do this weird thing where they daydream scenarios out loud and they may not be ... (read in full...)
Can relationships work if one smokes weed and the other doesn't?
Q. So my boyfriend smokes weed and I don't. As far as I know, he only does it with his roommates and doesn't pay his own money for the weed. I've smoked a few times when I was younger, and had bad expierences with it, so I generally say no when they ...
A. 16 August 2009: I'd stop pretending you don't care and tell him how you feel. Tell him you adore him as your boyfriend, but when he gets high he forgets you are there and that you don't like it, it doesn't feel good to feel like you are invisible. Tell him that ... (read in full...)
She's 16, I'm 25, and I fear that the changes she'll go through in the next few years will cause us to break up. What can I do?
Q. Im 25 and my girl friend is 16.I love her more then anything in life and she admits i am her first love and I believe it for the fact that i known some of her exs that sh dated for awhile and never had sex with them.we dated one month before she ...
A. 16 August 2009: Honey, whether you're 16 or 36 or 60... there are no guarantees. For anyone. Are you sitting around worrying if you will lose your job in 2 or 3 years? Are you worrying if you will get sick next summer? the more you focus on your fears the more ... (read in full...)
Could this lead to something more?
Q. Hey theres this girl i really like and she sent me a msg saying that outta the 3 other guys shes talkin to im the only one who hasnt asked for sex or photos and she thanked me for it and said she told the other 3 other guys to leave her alone. but i ...
A. 16 August 2009: Ask her out. Take it slow. She may just be texting with them because she doesn't have anything better to do. So... offer something better to do! then keep your eyes open. If it's proceeding and she's still texting with these other dudes then you can ... (read in full...)
I can't seem to bring myself out of my shell. Please help!
Q. Hi all, I've never dated before. I have asked out girls in the past (and got rejected obviously), and I've tried to work out what is wrong with me - the things that are making me undesirable - and I've pretty much got the jist of it. And what a l...
A. 16 August 2009: and here's a really radical idea... next time you are at a party and you meet a nice girl (or 2 or 3) why not try just asking for advice? Say... you know, I'm really shy. Can you help me? Can you give me any advice on how to talk to girls? I can't ... (read in full...)
I can't seem to bring myself out of my shell. Please help!
Q. Hi all, I've never dated before. I have asked out girls in the past (and got rejected obviously), and I've tried to work out what is wrong with me - the things that are making me undesirable - and I've pretty much got the jist of it. And what a l...
A. 16 August 2009: Hi darlin, don't go hide under a rock all that will do is make you feel even lonelier. I know it might feel overwhelming, but there are a lot of other people your age who are in the same boat. You just need to build your confidence up a bit. You ... (read in full...)
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