A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Say a guy turns 40 and soon after, his 29 year old girlfriend of 6 years dumps him unceremoniously for a 20 year old. I know that's going to hurt, badly, but I'm wondering how I fit into it: I'm a very attractive (not to toot my own horn, but I get told that a lot) 23 year old who's been dating the 40 year old for nearly a year now, since not long after their breakup. We share an intense connection and I love him so much, but I can't help wondering if I could be some kind of symptom of his hurt. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Tigerlily  +, writes (16 August 2009):
It sounds like you are asking if you are the rebound girl. Well, maybe. But why would you be part of the reason why he's hurting? that doesn't make sense. Because you are young and remind him of his ex? I don't think so. If you have been dating for a year then he cares for you. When you are 40 you have way more baggage been through way more stuff and things take longer to heal.
You don't really give much detail on what the actual problem is between you and him.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2009): Men, when things don't go well can go running to the nearest woman for some affection. He is no different. It takes a little time for a man to get over the ex. And to bond with you. He will eventually be with you. I don't know any other behaviours he has. There are complications to this in a few cases. But this is generally it.
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