If I am to do so, how do I tell someone they have been creatively inspirational?
Q. I am a singer/songwriter, who like many artists, is at times inspired by a member of the fairer sex, as the old phrase goes. There is someone I get to work with every so often, and to say she has piqued my interest is an understatement of the ...
A. 29 March 2016: It sounds like you have low self esteem, enjoy getting to know her more, don't worry about how she feels at the moment, enjoy brunch and afterwards ask her out for dinner a night? See how she reacts. Just take it slow. ... (read in full...)
What can I do when she gets in a mood like this?
Q. My friend has been really difficult and I don't know how to deal with it or if it's even worth it. She's been having a hard time the last couple of years and the things we both went through in life is what made us bond in the first place, as much ...
A. 16 March 2016: I am glad to hear it, put yourself first, nobody should ever put another person down and when they do they are not a friend but someone who is jealous of what you have. You are doing the right thing moving on. Go out and meet new people, hopefully ... (read in full...)
What can I do to manage my own feelings? This relationship is pulling me down
Q. Dear everyone, I am in my first relationship with my partner for 2 years and 3 months now. During the first 12 months, everything seems so perfect and sweet and I was wonderfully showered with love and attention everyday. Eventually, the honeym...
A. 16 March 2016: I agree, texting each other is not going to help, these conversations need to be done on a face to face level. You could be over thinking her messages and vice versa. ... (read in full...)
If I am to do so, how do I tell someone they have been creatively inspirational?
Q. I am a singer/songwriter, who like many artists, is at times inspired by a member of the fairer sex, as the old phrase goes. There is someone I get to work with every so often, and to say she has piqued my interest is an understatement of the ...
A. 15 March 2016: I don't think it will be harassment if you just say to her hey here is a demo off some stuff I have been working on, you where an inspiration for some of the songs and I just wanted to thank you. ... (read in full...)
What can I do when she gets in a mood like this?
Q. My friend has been really difficult and I don't know how to deal with it or if it's even worth it. She's been having a hard time the last couple of years and the things we both went through in life is what made us bond in the first place, as much ...
A. 15 March 2016: Again I don't think she needs to be in your life. She is not being a friend, the best thing for you to do is block her number and find new friends who are kind to you. ... (read in full...)
Why do some people like my boyfriend feel the need to embellish the truth or just outright lie?
Q. Have been with my boyfriend six years, all is very good except one thing, his bad habit of telling silly lies. He knows how much I detest lying yet still keeps doing it, he doesn't lie about anything important so I don't get it, what is the point! I ...
A. 14 March 2016: Sounds like he could be a compulsive liar. If this is a deal breaker for you, then you need to tell him he needs to get help or else the relationship is over. Yes there is help available out there for people with these issues. It is part of his ... (read in full...)
What can I do to manage my own feelings? This relationship is pulling me down
Q. Dear everyone, I am in my first relationship with my partner for 2 years and 3 months now. During the first 12 months, everything seems so perfect and sweet and I was wonderfully showered with love and attention everyday. Eventually, the honeym...
A. 14 March 2016: Generally the honeymoon period does phase out, maybe you are expecting a bit to much from her.
You want to not feel these feelings. Therefore try and look at the good things she does. Okay she might not write you letters any more, but there must... (read in full...)
Dating for 5 weeks. How do I let him know that I'm still interested despite me rejecting him advances??
Q. I've been dating a sweet, genuine guy for about 5 weeks. During the first few weeks he was always initiating conversations throughout the day and towards the middle it evened out between us. We had a make out session this past weekend howe...
A. 14 March 2016: Don't feel insecure about it. Either he has been busy or else you might need to face the fact that he is looking for a physical relationship.
It has only been five weeks so I can see why you don't want to rush in to the sexual part, and if he does... (read in full...)
If I am to do so, how do I tell someone they have been creatively inspirational?
Q. I am a singer/songwriter, who like many artists, is at times inspired by a member of the fairer sex, as the old phrase goes. There is someone I get to work with every so often, and to say she has piqued my interest is an understatement of the ...
A. 14 March 2016: I think you should give her a copy of the songs you have wrote about her. Tell her that she inspires you and that you would like to thank her. Sometimes age doesn't matter to people. I am sure she will take it as a compliment. Good luck.... (read in full...)
Does Online Dating work for men?
Q. So I have been trying to make sense of this... Does online dating really work for men? I ask this because I put up my profile on 2 sites (one famous paid site and one famous free site) and I'm very disappointed with the results. I have a decent ...
A. 14 March 2016: I think you might just need a bit more patience. Okay so it has not worked to well yet, but sometimes these things take some time.
When you say a thoughtful message what exactly are you saying when you first contact these girls? Maybe if you tell... (read in full...)
If I date or have someone else should I tell my ex who is in jail? He wants to know everything!
Q. So my ex is currently in jail has been in there for a year already and looking at 3 to 4 years the most but could be out by the end of this year if his bond gets lowered .. He has been calling me everyday from the jail phone and we been talking ...
A. 14 March 2016: Sweetie if you want to be with this guy then you need to be honest with him. If you are seeing other people you need to be honest with them as well.
My advice would be not to wait about for your ex. Be honest with him and tell him you are goin... (read in full...)
He said lets get to know each other but that was 2 months ago and no contact since!
Q. A guy I was quite close to got back in touch with me in January this year after we hadn't spoke for a couple of years I had helped him through a mutual friend to get a job and he obviously found out So anyway we started talking again etc but th...
A. 13 March 2016: No he is not interested, he found out you helped, so he thanked u as he saw fit, nothing more. Sorry for disappointment ... (read in full...)
What can I do when she gets in a mood like this?
Q. My friend has been really difficult and I don't know how to deal with it or if it's even worth it. She's been having a hard time the last couple of years and the things we both went through in life is what made us bond in the first place, as much ...
A. 12 March 2016: No sweetie I don't think that you should reply. Be the bigger person here. She has made it clear she wants nothing to do with you, she is hoping you will take the hint. It's sad yes, but I think you need to accept she no longer wants you in her ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's obsession with his friend's girlfriend is creepy
Q. My on/off bf of two years has known this girl for a year because she is on and off with his best friend. Ever since he met her, he’s hidden the fact that he’s socialised with her, he’s liked all of her profile pictures on facebook, all of her ...
A. 12 March 2016: Well am glad to hear that you have broken up with him, now you just need to remove him from your life, hard it may be but it will be worth it in the end. Block him from everything, block him from calling you, refuse to have any contact with him, if ... (read in full...)
He's made some changes. Disagreements happen. Should I stay or should I go?
Q. I am a 28 year old female and have been dating my boyfriend for 8 months. We get along great. We enjoy each other's company, we both have great careers, family get along, similar hobbies, ect. I have never had a person to have so much in common and ...
A. 11 March 2016: Off course you want a serious relationship, you are at the age now where a relationship means more than a childhood crush. Is he the same age as you? Unfortunately regardless of his age he is not on the same wavelength as you. If you have already ... (read in full...)
I'm constantly down and teary, and I'm afraid I'm pushing my boyfriend away! Advice needed!
Q. So right now i have this horrible feeling i am pushing my boyfriend away! I dont know whats going on right now i am constantly down and teary, takes the sillyest little thing to set me off. I feel completely useless and dont know how to fix it! The ...
A. 11 March 2016: Make an appointment with your doctor and tell them how you are feeling, they will give you the best advice on how to move away from these feelings, and will advice you on what path to take. ... (read in full...)
Heartbroken over my ex. Why is his new girlfriend taking revenge this way?
Q. I am so heart broken right now. I was with my ex for 3 years. We've been through a lot together, we loved and sacrificed for each other. We were there for each other through thick and thin. The only thing was we always argued about every little t...
A. 11 March 2016: Sweetie looking at your update you really need to move on from this relationship. First off you say he asked you permission to download an app? Who needs to ask permission to do such a thing on their phone? Why would he feel the need to ask you if ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's obsession with his friend's girlfriend is creepy
Q. My on/off bf of two years has known this girl for a year because she is on and off with his best friend. Ever since he met her, he’s hidden the fact that he’s socialised with her, he’s liked all of her profile pictures on facebook, all of her ...
A. 11 March 2016: The thing is if you don't feel loved or valued enough in this relationship then you should end it. I don't think you trust this guy, therefore my guess is that you should end this relationship. Why be with someone who takes more notice of his BF ... (read in full...)
Is he with me just because he is lonely and cannot get anyone else?
Q. Hello, I am a black girl in my 30s and recently started to date an older white male. Hes a lovely guy, great, funny....however all his past girlfriends, and his ex wife have been oriental women. He was even going to move there at one point...
A. 11 March 2016: Okay so yes he is at a lonely stage in his life at the moment. So yes I can understand why you would feel a little insecure. You spend your days together, you have fun together, so this must mean good things? Do you feel he is only wanting sex and ... (read in full...)
Do people still fall in love these days or is that an outdated concept?
Q. What is everyone's opinion on this? Since I'm back in the dating world, I have to say that it's a real cesspool out there. Everyone seems a bit jaded, and women put up these walls and hurdles that you have to jump through in order crack thei...
A. 11 March 2016: I think what you must remember is that your ex girlfriend is in your past for a reason. If you are trying to look for a replacement for her in your life well then no I don't think that will work. No other girl is going to be your ex, and comparing ... (read in full...)
I can't stand my boyfriend's rommate!!
Q. Hi, I do need help. I have a boyfriend who lives with 2 singles guys. Sometimes I go and spend a night there or most the time he comes here to my place (i live alone). last week he invited me to come over, when i was in the closet searching for a ja...
A. 11 March 2016: Am afraid that there really is nothing that you can do here, yes he is your boyfriend and you are worried, but he is also responsible for himself and his own choices, you cannot give out if someone uses his room as it is none of your business, ... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my ex she has contacted me out of the blue and I don't wish to have anything to do with her
Q. Hello everyone. How are you all? Okay, so I'm not sure how this goes? First time here. I really need some advice. I, like many others had everything. Cutting a long story short. I lost it all. I got involved with a lady I should never ...
A. 11 March 2016: You should not live your life in fear of someone else, what could she possibly do that makes you so afraid off her? What was it she done in the past that caused you to lose everything? There are much deeper issues here than social media, you cannot ... (read in full...)
How important is appreciation in the first couple dates?
Q. Just wondering... I'm sure it's important, but I wonder to what extent. I'm not the kind of person who says thank you for every little thing... I'm not sure why. I had an ex after dating for a few years tell me I didn't really say thank you when h...
A. 11 March 2016: I am the opposite to you, I say thank you for everything, maybe sometimes a little to much, I am the same when it comes to saying sorry, if someone bumps in to me I will be the one to apologize.
Obviously you feel this might be an issue when you ... (read in full...)
What is it called when a relationship breaks up and you turn into best friends?
Q. I and my boyfriend has been together for 4 months. We have broken up last week. But now, we have remained as bestfriends. He said he will never have a girlfriend again officially and so do I. What do we call when relationships turn into best ...
A. 11 March 2016: You both have agreed to each other that you will never have a boyfriend or girlfriend again, which to me seems quite odd as am sure as you are growing older one day you will want to settle down with someone.
The question here is do you want to be w... (read in full...)
My boyfriend was rude to my old friend, was he unreasonable?
Q. It was my birthday a few months ago and I had invited my sister, her boyfriend, my cousins and some close friends including my school friend from secondary school to celebrate it with me in a restaurant. Hes a guy and I haven't seen him in years. ...
A. 11 March 2016: You should be glad this relationship is over it was not healthy. I know it is hard to get over someone that you love, and yes you are going to find it difficult but you need to start to let go honey. Yes he done a lot of things wrong, and yes you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend was rude to my old friend, was he unreasonable?
Q. It was my birthday a few months ago and I had invited my sister, her boyfriend, my cousins and some close friends including my school friend from secondary school to celebrate it with me in a restaurant. Hes a guy and I haven't seen him in years. ...
A. 11 March 2016: Well am guessing this is a new boyfriend or else you have got back together with your ex, either way, no it's not good to lie to your boyfriend and hide things from him, especially if you know that this is going to cause drama. You texting boys ... (read in full...)
Can I learn to be a sexual 'sub'? The man I love is ending our relationship because he doesn't think so!
Q. My boyfriend just ended our relationship and I am devastated. He really was my best friend and in my whole life I have never met anyone on my wavelength like that. The reason, he said, he ended it is that he is into bdsm in a big way and is ...
A. 11 March 2016: Okay so maybe the idea does excite you, but as he thinks it just doesn't come natural to you and he probably doesn't want to change you in to something that you are not. I can't say if he loves you or not, but it does not sound like he is willing to ... (read in full...)
How do I approach my GF weight issue?
Q. In the 3 years we have been together my GF has been slowly letting herself go physically to the point where I no longer find her attractive. When we met in college, she was more physically active on a daily basis but now she has an office job wher...
A. 10 March 2016: Am afraid only she can help with her weight loss. Yes you can support her and help her along, but it doesn't look like she is taking it serious, therefore other than saying to her you do not find her attractive anymore there is no gentle way to put ... (read in full...)
Could this be called psychological abuse?
Q. Hello. Advice would be really welcome here. In a long distance relationship of over a year. Good times and bad. Currently we had a heated discussion last week which we did not share a view on, and he did what he has done before and totally ignor...
A. 10 March 2016: You have said yourself that he knows how this makes you feel, yet he keeps doing this, so what does this tell you? Do you think you should continue being with someone who thinks it is okay to make you feel like this? Or should you take control and ... (read in full...)
He thinks I should chill out. How can I get him to realize that what he did has made me feel so bad?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for three years and we always had such an amazing sex life, he gave me a lot of confidence and I'm really sad that he is knocking it all back out of me. For the majority of our relationship he has loved going down...
A. 10 March 2016: I am not sure what has made him stop doing this, if he has done this for three years well am sure its not a case that he has got lazy all off a sudden. Could he be stressed about anything? Maybe his libido has just lowered at the moment.
Off cour... (read in full...)
He tries to kiss me then says we should just remain friends??!!
Q. Someone anyone pleeeaaassee. I am confused as heck right now!! Okay so a couple months ago one of my friends admitted he has liked me almost our entire friendship and had tried to kiss me. But when i just sat there and didnt kiss him back he aske...
A. 10 March 2016: If you like him then try kissing him and see how it goes. Maybe he is scared off rejection as well. Go for it. ... (read in full...)
Am I in the wrong because I don't want my jobless boyfriend moving in with me and depending on me to get him a job?
Q. My LDR BF said he wants to move in with me and asked me to find him a job at the company where I work. He has been working as a part time delivery boy for a local restaurant for about a year after I've known him. Then he hurt his toe and said he ...
A. 10 March 2016: If you are wanting to stay in a relationship with him well then yes you should help him find work and be a supportive girlfriend, but no you should not employ him, as this would be a disaster, you say he is lazy so he will take advantage off you, ... (read in full...)
He said he wants to try again but now has gone silent!
Q. Hi, my ex stoped speaking to me last Sept last yr , then all of a sudden he contacted me on 14 Feb, saying how he missed me, and how it was all him with being a father figer to my little girl and got scared, and wasnt used to someone being so nice ...
A. 9 March 2016: It sounds like he is messing with your head. You and your little girl deserve a permanent fixture in your life, not someone who comes and goes as he pleases.
Remember he is an ex for a reason. He was probably feeling lonely so he gave you a text... (read in full...)
We need to plan for our future but talking about it makes partner anxious.
Q. Dear cupid, I have a multifaceted question about relationships and midlife crisis and men and women maturing at different rates. I have been married for 8 years together for 18. We are reaching a point in our relationship where I want to take our...
A. 9 March 2016: I think he is scared of the unknown. He seems to have fallen in to a comfortable routine with life and does not want change. Before you bring a baby in to this marriage, you do need to make sure it is what you both want, as yes things like this can ... (read in full...)
Ex partner is a born again Christian now and I am scared of our daughters upbringing
Q. Hello everyone, Can anyone please give me some advice on how to deal with bringing up my 2 year old daughter with my ex partner who is now an evangelist born again Christian. Before we split up I was with him for years and he hated all forms...
A. 9 March 2016: This really is a tough one. Something that I think your child should not be brought in to. But am not sure if talking to your ex will do you any good, as it seems he has become extremely religious and will not listen.
In my opinion your child shou... (read in full...)
I wonder what I have missed.
Q. I met my boyfriend when I was quite young. We started dating and have now been together nine years. He was the first person I slept with and therefore the only person (fyi I was not his first but this is not my issue). I find it really unsettling ...
A. 9 March 2016: What do you think you have missed out on? Sleeping with random men? Hooking up for fun? Maybe falling pregnant or catching an STI?
Sweetie I think you are building this up to be something that it is not. Yes he may be the only guy you have been with... (read in full...)
Seven months dating and her dad is talking about how much say he will have in marriage
Q. My girlfriend's parents are painfully overbearing and it's caused serious stress with me, her, and this relationship. I've been going out with this girl for 7 months now, I'm 19, she's 18. For the entirety of the relationship it's been one roadblo...
A. 9 March 2016: You are in a very sticky situation, the thing is your girlfriend wants to obey her parents therefore she agrees to these rules, which is sad because she is stuck between you and her over powering dad.
Off course you have your own beliefs and you ... (read in full...)
My parents are splitting us up!
Q. Well me and my boyfriend have been together for 2 weeks. I've had a hikkie or love bite on my neck for around 4 days. She only just noticed it before when we were in the shops looking down the isle. She said "why have you got a love bite on your ...
A. 9 March 2016: I think your parents are just worried for you at such a young age. Maybe you can have a talk with your mum, tell her that you don't want to split up with your boyfriend but that you will be more careful in future that he does not leave marks on your ... (read in full...)
Can I win her over?
Q. So I was in the library at my college the other day and as I was looking for a place to study I saw this very unique and exotic looking girl. She had the most beautiful dark hair and the most intense features. I saw her before on campus and her pers...
A. 9 March 2016: Well it is nice to see you have someone else in the radar and good luck with the date. Sometimes people don't want to come across rude so they don't say they are not interested, its not that she was being mean, she probably was just taken off guard ... (read in full...)
Was it my fault or my ex boyfriends?
Q. Am I in the wrong here or is my ex boyfriend? I invited him to my sisters bbq at her house. When we arrived my sister asked me what I was drinking and if I wanted some wine so she poured me a glass. My boyfriend said he didn't want a drink, I ...
A. 9 March 2016: I have followed your posts, and they are all surrounded by you drinking. You say you hid your glass from him? Why? Secretive drinking really is a big problem. Yes it is okay to have a drink, but when we start hiding it we are lying to those around ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for a widow to sleep with her late husband's married best friend ?
Q. I am a forty year old widow. My husband passed away in January 2014. I was very lonely. My husband's best friend, X, and his wife Y used to visit when my husband was alive and continued to do so after my husband's death. A month later Y noticed ...
A. 9 March 2016: Well it was his wife's idea, and you have all agreed to this arrangement therefore I don't see that it is wrong. Me personally I wouldn't be able to do this, but if you are satisfied and you are still happy that he goes home to his wife at night ... (read in full...)
Has anyone else's husband said to his wife that she will be a burden on a business trip?
Q. My husband goes on some business trips during the year, but usually in the state we live in. Sometimes, I am able to go with him and he has been okay with that and he enjoys me going along. He will be going on a new business trip on the coa...
A. 9 March 2016: My guess would be that he wants some time out, to do his work then relax on his own in his spare time. It is okay for married couples to be apart as well. Maybe you can compromise and ask him to take you there for a trip away on another date, and ... (read in full...)
It's over. Is going no contact the best way forward?
Q. My boyfriend yelled at me. In his words, not yell but was speaking curtly. He used expletives and went on about how he wants nothing to do with me. I am a little unnerved and shocked. Right now, I don't want to have any contact with him. I am tr...
A. 9 March 2016: Yes if you don't want him in your future then block all contact. You don't need this in your life. Take time out to be happy by yourself. ... (read in full...)
Could this be called psychological abuse?
Q. Hello. Advice would be really welcome here. In a long distance relationship of over a year. Good times and bad. Currently we had a heated discussion last week which we did not share a view on, and he did what he has done before and totally ignor...
A. 9 March 2016: I don't think I would go as far as saying it is abuse. However it sounds like he is very immature and not ready for a relationship. Whenever things get heated he shuts down and remains there for days. It is not healthy. The person you are with ... (read in full...)
How to ask out a guy when I'm scared he'll say no and I'll look stupid
Q. I've started an adults course at college one day a week and I have fallen for my teacher. We are both in our late 20's and we get on well but I don't want to do anything while he is still my teacher. The course finishes in a month and the whole ...
A. 9 March 2016: Its worth a shot, its better to have tried than to be left wondering what if. Just tell him on the night out that it would be nice to keep in contact and offer him your number if he wants to get in touch. Play it cool. ... (read in full...)
how do I determine if this guy is serious about me? Or is he just using me as a rebound?
Q. i just want to know if I'm overreacting or not , okay so I've been talking to my ex lately again he reached out to me and honestly it's kike a cycle with him repeating over and over again. Its like one minute he's all serious about being a relation...
A. 9 March 2016: He is an ex for a reason. It didn't work out when you where younger and I doubt it would work between you both again. When he finds himself alone and no other girl that is interested in him, well then he picks up the phone and says all the right ... (read in full...)
Can I win her over?
Q. So I was in the library at my college the other day and as I was looking for a place to study I saw this very unique and exotic looking girl. She had the most beautiful dark hair and the most intense features. I saw her before on campus and her pers...
A. 9 March 2016: Okay well if she has not wrote back to you, then I would leave it at that for now. Maybe she is unsure yet what she wants to do. If she is not responding then you should give her time and see if she writes back. ... (read in full...)
Can I win her over?
Q. So I was in the library at my college the other day and as I was looking for a place to study I saw this very unique and exotic looking girl. She had the most beautiful dark hair and the most intense features. I saw her before on campus and her pers...
A. 8 March 2016: Do you both not get a lunch break at college? Maybe grab lunch together, so it is casual and so you can both just have time to relax and chat. She is probably not to over enthusiastic at the moment, because to her you are the perfect stranger and ... (read in full...)
Do people still fall in love these days or is that an outdated concept?
Q. What is everyone's opinion on this? Since I'm back in the dating world, I have to say that it's a real cesspool out there. Everyone seems a bit jaded, and women put up these walls and hurdles that you have to jump through in order crack thei...
A. 7 March 2016: I guess every-bodies opinion is going to be different on this topic. I know quite a lot of girls that love going out at the weekend just purely for sex with random men, they are looked upon as sluts and easy. Yet most young men are out looking for ... (read in full...)
What can I do when she gets in a mood like this?
Q. My friend has been really difficult and I don't know how to deal with it or if it's even worth it. She's been having a hard time the last couple of years and the things we both went through in life is what made us bond in the first place, as much ...
A. 22 February 2016: I bet you miss her as she was a friend, but not a very good one. I think she needs to help herself and if you contact her she will not be getting the help she needs. Off course it is up to you which path you choose. Am not sure how you would start ... (read in full...)
What can I do when she gets in a mood like this?
Q. My friend has been really difficult and I don't know how to deal with it or if it's even worth it. She's been having a hard time the last couple of years and the things we both went through in life is what made us bond in the first place, as much ...
A. 28 January 2016: I understand that it can be hard to be blunt, especially to a friend, but you need to try, for your own sake. You need to stand up for yourself in life. ... (read in full...)
What can I do when she gets in a mood like this?
Q. My friend has been really difficult and I don't know how to deal with it or if it's even worth it. She's been having a hard time the last couple of years and the things we both went through in life is what made us bond in the first place, as much ...
A. 27 January 2016: Well done for being there for her and for supporting her. But something has got to give. You cannot allow her to lash out at you all the time and for her to think it is okay. She is negative about her life, although she tries to put you down further ... (read in full...)
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