I now feel like a spare part in this marriage
Q. Hi everyone, I hope you will be able to offer me some advice to stop my marriage sliding towards problems. I am a 51 year old man. Re-married after a divorce and have been happily married for the last 4 years. We have a lovely son together (2...
A. 21 April 2016: If she can not compromise with you, then pack your bags and leave for a week, tell her you cannot take it any more that you feel you are making all the effort and she is not. If you leaving doesn't make her see that she is not meeting you in the ... (read in full...)
How do I address this situation and this cheating?
Q. I got involved with my friends boyfriend A , we still dating even now behind her back.i always feel awful about it.I tried to break up with him but its not working we always find a way to get back to each other. Now A and my friend S have beautifu...
A. 20 April 2016: Well if it took you so long to get over your boyfriend then imagine how much harder it will be for her with a child also you say you only ever loved this guy so that makes me think you didn't love your boyfriend yet you found it difficult. She needs ... (read in full...)
How do I address this situation and this cheating?
Q. I got involved with my friends boyfriend A , we still dating even now behind her back.i always feel awful about it.I tried to break up with him but its not working we always find a way to get back to each other. Now A and my friend S have beautifu...
A. 19 April 2016: Its not called dating, its called being used for sex behind his girlfriends back am afraid. He enjoys having sex with you that is why you always find a way back to him because he is always wanting you to do the dirty behind his girlfriends back, he ... (read in full...)
Do you think this short break from each other might bring us back together?
Q. Hi....i would like to thank everyone in advance for replies. My ex whom i adore still rings me most days.....pops in to see me.....helps me with jobs.....we have tea together and his body language suggests he has strong feelings for me. He says h...
A. 19 April 2016: Okay so it sounds like you are both still very close and you both enjoy each others company. But what was it that broke you both up to begin with? Was it you or him? Am guessing it was him that ended the relationship.
It is true that people can ... (read in full...)
Do I end this friendship with my ex? I'm feeling very hurt and confused
Q. I'll start off by saving for the past 5-6 months I have been in an emotional tornado regarding my ex boyfriend. It has been hell for me, seriously. And I'm extremely confused about everything I was with my ex boyfriend for over 3 years, HE broke ...
A. 19 April 2016: I think he is using you as his crutch. He tells you he loves you so that you will keep being their for you, he tells you his problems with his girlfriend, yet nobody is forcing him to be with her, and nobody is forcing him not to be with you. He is ... (read in full...)
Should I hint to him that I want this, or should I leave in the hope that he will ask instead?
Q. I had a drunken one night stand with a guy in my first term at university and we eventually became friends with benefits. This carried on for three months, until we both developed feelings and felt the best thing to do was end things as neither ...
A. 19 April 2016: You both are not sure off what you want from the sound of your post, maybe he is afraid to ask you out in case he gets rejected, or maybe he has just falling in to a routine and is happy. Either way you both know each other enough now to be honest ... (read in full...)
Should I accept? Ex bf has a gf, but wants to start over with me as friends and see where things go
Q. I need to start off by saying I am emotionally in a bad place these last few days, and I may be all over the place with this. I severely need help from unbiased views. I feel uncomfortable talking with friends about this. An ex bf of mine (was ...
A. 19 April 2016: Off course you are not an idiot, he is. If he wants a friendship well then I think you need to tell him you don't want him as a friend as you will only develop feelings for him, plus if he doesn't see it as a problem you and him being friends, ... (read in full...)
Should you ever give flaky guys a second chance?
Q. When I say flake, I don't mean cancelling or calling beforehand to reschedule or calls afterwards to explain the bizarre emergency situation in which he was unable to call. A flake to me , Is someone that makes plans with you. You set the date...
A. 19 April 2016: No it is not unreasonable, we all expect common courtesy. If someone can genuinely not make it and let you know before hand that something has came up and then they make it up to you well then I would let it slide, but if someone makes a no show and ... (read in full...)
If I don't orgasm does that mean I was used for sex?
Q. I've been struggling with this idea lately. I want to lose my vaginal virginity, but I know I probably won't get off so...How do I deal with not getting off but knowing the guy will? I could probably come from oral...But I still wouldn't be gett...
A. 19 April 2016: You don't need to have an orgasm to actually enjoy sex. The thing is the sex itself should feel good, should feel satisfying and yes you can have an orgasm through sex. Your attitude to sex at the moment is wrong, but only because you have not ... (read in full...)
Any time I go near this guy my friend comes over and drags him off. What can I do?
Q. So there's this disco that everyone goes to and this boy I kind of like wants me to kiss him at it. I keep trying to text him but he doesn't reply. My best friend who knows I like him and want to kiss him at the disco keeps flitting with him. Sh...
A. 19 April 2016: How do you know that this boy wants to kiss you at the disco? Has he told you or did it come from someone else? You keep trying to make conversation but he doesn't bother replying which makes me think that he is not interested in you at all, because ... (read in full...)
Do I give him a chance? Boyfriend told ex girlfriend he still loves her
Q. Hi I've been with my boyfriend for about 4 months. I know that's a short time but I really care about him and am happy with him. Last night I was hanging out at his place and he went out with a couple friends to go eat. I wasn't feeling good and...
A. 19 April 2016: Okay so no he hasn't really been honest with you, because he never told you he still loves his ex girlfriend? In reality he should not be with you until he is ready to move away from his past. At the moment he is not over his ex girlfriend and if I ... (read in full...)
I now feel like a spare part in this marriage
Q. Hi everyone, I hope you will be able to offer me some advice to stop my marriage sliding towards problems. I am a 51 year old man. Re-married after a divorce and have been happily married for the last 4 years. We have a lovely son together (2...
A. 19 April 2016: I can tell that your wife wants to be a friend to her son and not a parent, which in turn will effect him growing up and learning to become an adult, what is she like with the two year old? Does she help with their learning skills?
I guess some... (read in full...)
My boyfriend insists on keeping in touch with his ex
Q. My fiancée still keeps in contact with his ex girlfriend by sms. He says that it's only messaging not talking and he only answers her messages. When i asked him why he did it he said he liked giving her hope and being a shit to her. Once when i a...
A. 18 April 2016: He sounds very immature to be honest. He wanted to keep giving her hope and being a shit, well how nice off him to keep messing this poor girl around. It sounds like she may still like him and he likes the attention so he replies, so he can keep her ... (read in full...)
Until recently nothing has bothered me. But now I find myself conflicted. How do I go forward?
Q. 25 years, 25 years. I have been caring for both my parents and my sister for 25 years and to be honest nothing has really bother me. Until recently, my brother has suddenly reappeared in our lives after almost 10 years of nothing. The promises h...
A. 18 April 2016: Well done for taking on such a responsibility. I salute you.
Now your brother has reappeared, and in fairness you are not sure what he has been through, but allow him now to help you out, allow him to look after your parents and sister and go and ... (read in full...)
Do you think he's interested?
Q. I hung out with this guy, that I'm starting to have a crush on, and out mutual friend the other day. We were all talking about Hawaii and I mentioned that one my my ex lives in Hawaii and my crush asked me about my past relationships and it took me ...
A. 18 April 2016: No never lie, it is never a good way to go. Okay so he has no experience but that doesn't mean that you have put him off at all. It could be just that he is shy as well.
Keep getting to know him, be friendly with him, flirt and then see how it goes... (read in full...)
I'm in a pickle about what to do. Am I expecting too much, or is he not putting enough effort in?
Q. Hi bi guy here and really need help please read all. So back in September I met this guy via an online dating site. I was drunk and he was at work but it was a good meet. We started seeing each other regularly and everytime he was opening up about...
A. 18 April 2016: Look he done wrong to begin with by not telling you he had a boyfriend, his poor partner. This behavior from both of you could ruin his life, I hate how people are so selfish by cheating and don't see how it effects the other person. It can ruin ... (read in full...)
Should he expect me to leave skype on 24/7, so he can conact me, while he is away?
Q. My husband has gone on vacation to see his family, When he is at home with me he neglects me and is all day on Skype to his family particularly mother. And I'm not exaggerating. Mother comes first for everything. But he does not like me to see ...
A. 18 April 2016: You both need to talk about this when he comes back from visiting his family. Maybe he is missing his family a lot and this is why he feels the need to talk to them daily, surely he can't spend 24 hours a day talking to them? Roughly how long a day ... (read in full...)
I now feel like a spare part in this marriage
Q. Hi everyone, I hope you will be able to offer me some advice to stop my marriage sliding towards problems. I am a 51 year old man. Re-married after a divorce and have been happily married for the last 4 years. We have a lovely son together (2...
A. 18 April 2016: It can be really difficult when it comes to parenting a teenager, especially when he is your wives son and not yours. Yes you are his step dad but is his real father around?
You both sounds like opposites when it comes to parenting, while this is o... (read in full...)
I believe my sister has Boderline Personality Disorder
Q. Hi there, I would love to hear from anyone who either has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or has some understanding of this complex mental illness. My sister suffers from BPD, which seemed to develop around the age of 15. We grew up...
A. 18 April 2016: It sounds like your sister could be jealous of you. I am not sure if she is mentally ill, but only a doctor will be able to assess that. If she is not willing to get help then am afraid nobody can do anything.
It seems like she has had a trou... (read in full...)
Should I stay with the boyfriend I met on facebook? He was taking drugs so I broke up with him.
Q. I was with my boyfriend for 44 days. I started dating him over facebook. I didn't know what he looked like so we met up and kept meeting then he asked me out. I dumped him because he was taking drugs, getting garried (a pill you swallow and it m...
A. 18 April 2016: It is okay to be sad, it is all part of growing up, having fun times and sad times. At least you are smart and you are thinking with your head, you know whats important for your future and that's great. Well done. ... (read in full...)
I told my married ex lover I had a boyfriend and he burst into tears.
Q. I have been seeing a married man for 10 years and he said that we could be together properly once the children were off his hands,but we split up due to me being bored with the situation....anyway I met someone else and although I don't love him I ...
A. 15 April 2016: Am sure after you both seeing each other for ten years there must be feelings on both parts, it would be hard not to have developed feelings after such a long time.
Look at the end of the day he took you for granted, he had the best of both worl... (read in full...)
How soon can I bring up exclusivity?
Q. I've been dating this girl for three months after it started one night when she sent me a drunken message saying that she had fancied me for ages. I had feelings for her at this point but I didn't know what these feelings were. We've been dating for ...
A. 15 April 2016: You say that you are dating this girl for three months and you haven't even kissed yet??? It doesn't sound like dating to me. Okay so you are both female but I don't see why that would stop you from being intimate? Are you sure you are both on the ... (read in full...)
My children and I need a different life.
Q. My relationship is very complicated. I met my boyfriend while working as a part-time bartender. The first time I met him he told me that his wife had died six weeks prior. I was in shock by how easily he said it but yet I found that he was easy ...
A. 15 April 2016: Is there no way that you can move to Texas so that you can live as a family? I understand that his home is where you are, but surely a home is where you make it? Have you discussed long term where you will both lead to, will he always work away from ... (read in full...)
I want my boyfriend to understand how unhappy I am that he cheated and had sex in a massage parlor
Q. My boyfriend of 4.5 years has been a very loyal and humble person till recently. He had gone on a vacation and has sex at one of the massage parlours. He told me the very next day and has been very guilty and emotionally unstable since then. On the ...
A. 15 April 2016: I have answered this question before, however it is news that it was a massage palour, meaning not only did he cheat but he paid to do it? The thing is you say you told him not to do something like this, but sweetie you shouldn't need to tell him, ... (read in full...)
Should I hurt him now or wait for him to hurt me in a few months?
Q. Hi im 18 years of age and I'm at college I had previously broken up with am older guy that I had a long term relationship with I wasn't looking for anyone and I was happy but my friends all had partners and they decided to set me up wits a friend of ...
A. 15 April 2016: You are going out with this guy so you need to be able to talk to him about how you are feeling. So sit down with him and tell him you are worried that if you both get closer you are going to get hurt in a few months, he is probably worrying about ... (read in full...)
Did I make the right decision to give him space? because now I find he's dating someone else
Q. I'm pretty upset about a decision I made yesterday. My ex boyfriend broke up with me about 6 months ago but told me he still loves me and that maybe we would get back together in the future. I respected his decision and left him alone but he wan...
A. 14 April 2016: He more than likely said to you that use might get back together in the future so that he didn't seem like the bad guy and probably so that you didn't feel so rejected. I doubt he would have imagined that six months later you where still holding on ... (read in full...)
How should I approach my roommate to tell her that it's time for her to find a better BF?
Q. How do you tell your roommate that she just needs to move on? Sooo my roommate has broken up with a guy for 5 months who basically threw her out on Christmas but she is still pursuing him. From what she says he is awful to her and Ive heard hi...
A. 14 April 2016: You sound like a good person who wants to do the right thing, so if she asks you for your opinion you should be honest and tell her how you feel. Tell her that you feel she deserves better, and reassure her that you are there if she ever needs a ... (read in full...)
My BF has two red marks on his neck which were not there this morning. Should I worry he cheated?
Q. My BF has 2 red marks on his neck. They look like pimples only larger and flatter. They are close together. You could almost compare it to a vampire bite. What could they be? Background: He was supposed to come and see me this afternoon. He ...
A. 14 April 2016: Sweetie what actually makes you think that he is cheating on you? Where are your insecurities coming from? Is it from a past relationship? Is it you have no self esteem? Or does he treat you so badly that you cannot think he is only wanting you? ... (read in full...)
When I am tested for a STD should I trust the protocols in place re my privacy or should I give a false name?
Q. Hi, I am in need of advice. I am 18 years old and I recently had sex with 7 different men throughout the year. I had unprotected sex with 5 of those men. I am afraid that I caught an STD so I want to get checked. I plan to go to Planned Parentho...
A. 14 April 2016: I wouldn't advice using a fake name, look these tests are private, and they are there to help you not judge you. Yes it is scary getting these done, especially when you know you have risked your health in the last year, but still they have saw it ... (read in full...)
While struggling with depression should I open up now, to him, and risk making things worse for me?
Q. Hi, I've realized that I might be struggling with depression and it's taking a toll on my relationship with my closest friend. He knows me better than anyone and knows that I'm upset and something is happening to me but doesn't know why, and in...
A. 14 April 2016: I think you are handling it wrong, he wants to be there for you so let him, a problem shared is a problem halved. He sounds like a great friend and he just wants to help you, therefore you should let him help you. Okay so you are going to different ... (read in full...)
STDs and dating. Do I meet someone for coffee dinner ect first and then tell them a bit later?
Q. So here goes, I've had an std( herpes) since just after I turned 19. I'm 25 now. I met a man shortly after who had it as well, 4.5 yes and 2 kids later I am a single parent to both boys. I am finally feeling in a good place to date again. I fe...
A. 14 April 2016: I would tell you not to rely to heavily on online dating sites, as a lot of people find it draining going through a lot of men that just want to hook up. I think you should try and get out more, maybe get a babysitter and go to a local pub, take up ... (read in full...)
What do these feelings mean? He leaves me feeling a strange sense of calmness
Q. Hello, i have a very strange problem which i would like some advice on. There is this guy i met recently. We have become fast friends even though we have only met a few times. He's sweet, charming, and we are into a lot of the same things. I am p...
A. 14 April 2016: Its not a strange problem at all, you are just confused because it sounds like he is not the type of guy you would see as attractive yet your body is reacting different. My advice would be to trust your gut and go with the flow. This could turn out ... (read in full...)
Meeting my ex for a drink?
Q. My bf broke up with me after three months because hes going through a divorce and is very stressed and depressed. He moved out six months ago after their child had grown up after a long drawn out unhappy marriage. We had a lovely connection and I...
A. 14 April 2016: He stayed with you three months, which shows he did have an interest, but to me that probably was a rebound. He was not long out of his marriage, and he ended up in a relationship with you very quickly. It may have been an unhappy marriage but am ... (read in full...)
My homosexuality is killing me and left me alone with no options
Q. So I am posting a big question about my life, I am not sure if it fits with the nature of the contents here but I hope to get an answer! I am 34 years old and I feel that I am 50 years old , gay, middle eastern to Muslim parents, I didn’...
A. 14 April 2016: I think you should stop drinking to begin with, eat healthy food and do plenty of exercise. Get yourself back in a healthy shape and then proceed forward. You are saying that you are not straight, you have accepted that, now it is time to be honest ... (read in full...)
I really want to get together with him but put him off until after exams
Q. Thanks in advance to anyone who reads my question! I went to an event last weekend and was making eye contact and smiling with a guy there all day (upon his initiation). He was with his family and so was I and in our culture (we come from the same...
A. 14 April 2016: I think you are worrying over nothing here, it is perfectly acceptable to ask him to wait until after your exams, no harm in that, you are busy with study and if he is a mature young man then he will understand this. It does not mean though that you ... (read in full...)
My parents are paying for my education and keeping me under tight control
Q. I be never dated before because I wasn't allowed to. I also went to an all girls school and now attend community college. My parents said since they're paying I have to commute from home and if I make good grades and get my associate, I can transfer ...
A. 14 April 2016: I don't think that you should sneak behind your parents back, at the end of the day they are trying to give you the best start in life, and they don't want a man distracting that. I can see their point of view but I can also see why this is ... (read in full...)
What should I ask, when I speak to my Bf, about a stained black dress I found under my Bf's bed?
Q. I found a black dress with dried up white spots on the front under my boyfriend's bed. I do not live with my BF. I was in his apartment tidying it up for him. Now I wonder if he cheated? First I would like to know, does semen dry white when ...
A. 13 April 2016: Yes Semen would dry up and leave a white stain on black material. It doesn't sound very good that there is a dress under your boyfriends bed that does not belong to you, does he live alone or with other people? If he lives alone, well then I would ... (read in full...)
Do you think his response to the card I sent indicate that he is interested in me?
Q. Hello, I told a guy on his birthday like this:" that you special and that God created you and sent you as a gift to all who know you . On your birthday, I want to thank you that you have been able to change things in me that no one else could" ...
A. 13 April 2016: It is difficult to say, however I think if you like him, then you should ask him out, what is the worst that can happen? go for it, you only live once. ... (read in full...)
If a guy has a wart on his penis, then is it genital warts ? And for how long can genital warts be dormant in a person?
Q. Hi all my boyfriend has a wart on his penis which he is not sure where it came from. We have been together for nearly 3 years and I know he has been completely faithful as am I. I don't have any warts or anything. My question is, For how lon...
A. 13 April 2016: It may sound odd yes, but it is a fact, it is also a fact that it can last longer than two years in a woman's body also, but statistically it is less than 1 in 10 women, it is still possible though. ... (read in full...)
Have you ever asked your partner to 'unfriend' an opposite sex friend?
Q. Would you or have you ever asked your significant other to unfriend someone of the opposite sex on Facebook? For whatever reason, you did not want them associating with this person; jealousy or insecurity issues included among the reasons. Has ...
A. 13 April 2016: No I would never ask my partner to do this because I trust him completely. ... (read in full...)
I'm convinced my boyfriend is cheating on me
Q. I really need help. I have been distancing myself from my boyfriend of 2 years for the last little while. Maybe 6 months or so. It's been a slow and steady process. Designed to protect my heart from getting hurt very badly. I just could never trus...
A. 13 April 2016: I think you should end this relationship, what exactly is it that you love about him? About this relationship? All I can see is pain and hurt. You cannot change his past and him cheating, and you cannot get over that. The more you accuse him of ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to get Herpes by skin to skin contact?
Q. Is it possible to get Herpes by skin to skin contact. I only slept with one guy and he swears he tested negative. I have hugged other people but it was friendly hugs,nothing sexual. I am so confused because it was a full on outbreak for m...
A. 13 April 2016: No you cannot contact herpes by hugging someone, I think the guy you slept with is lying. ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with the boyfriend I met on facebook? He was taking drugs so I broke up with him.
Q. I was with my boyfriend for 44 days. I started dating him over facebook. I didn't know what he looked like so we met up and kept meeting then he asked me out. I dumped him because he was taking drugs, getting garried (a pill you swallow and it m...
A. 12 April 2016: Sweetie he is emotionally blackmailing you, he is trying to make you feel bad so that you will get in a relationship with him again, this is not the kind of guy you want to be with. You broke up with him because he took drugs and liked to make you ... (read in full...)
If a guy has a wart on his penis, then is it genital warts ? And for how long can genital warts be dormant in a person?
Q. Hi all my boyfriend has a wart on his penis which he is not sure where it came from. We have been together for nearly 3 years and I know he has been completely faithful as am I. I don't have any warts or anything. My question is, For how lon...
A. 11 April 2016: Generally when it lies dormant in a woman for more than two years then it is cleared, but chigirl it is different for a man, it can lie dormant for years in a man and then show up, so honeypie is right in what she is saying. Its good that he is ... (read in full...)
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