Can you really still be friends after saying the "L" word?
Q. Hello, I have been friends with a girl for sometime. Then one day I decided to tell her about the feelings i had for her. don't get me wrong we are (were?) friends. I told her because it was eating me up inside and getting worse each day, and i ...
A. 5 July 2009: Thats great news.... (read in full...)
Could he not like me because I'm "too good" for him?
Q. Heyyyzz i have one simple question im not trying to sound snotty but could i possibly be too "good" for a guy?? Could he not like me because im pretty or because i wear make up or am " high matinence" if you will...... Just wonderin...
A. 2 July 2009: Some guys can be intimdated by an attractive woman particularly if you are a big attention seeker who is also very outgoing with lots of friends and very popular with lots of girl and guy friends. It can feel like there is too much competition even ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him I want something serious or is he just using me?
Q. There is a guy who I've known for a while and he has a girlfriend that he's been dating for six months but he flirts with me all the time and talks about wanting to have sex with me. Should I tell him I want something serious or is he just using me?...
A. 2 July 2009: He is a heavy duty flirter having some very cheeky fun and seeing how far he can push it, a bit silly but it doesn't necessarily mean he wants to sleep with you. ... (read in full...)
I lied to him about the kind of car I drive, how can I tell him the truth?
Q. I lied to my bf about the type of car I used to have. I know this may sound really weird, why would I lie about something like that? Well, my car I used to have was a really expensive one and people would always judge me by it. As soon as I say what ...
A. 2 July 2009: Given all the negative feedback you have had I can understand why that was the first thing that popped into your head given the importance of a first impression. But that crazy moment is gone and you can let him know the truth by using humour to ... (read in full...)
I'm wondering if my boyfriend is having an emotional affair.
Q. I've been in a relationship for 12 years. I'm wondering if my boyfriend is having an emotional affair. he has a friend of the opposite sex. he tells me about her. i've met her but, she won't speak to me. she said she gets along better with guys. he ...
A. 2 July 2009: He has made an emotional connection which appears to be ok at the moment because he is telling you so much. You need to tell him again how important it is to you that he doesn't discuss your relationship at all. You need to speak to him quietly but ... (read in full...)
What made my b/f think he had the RIGHT to cheat on ME? Why do cheaters think they can get away with it?
Q. What I would like to know is what makes people think they have the right to cheat on their partners and think they can get away with it...i mean where the hell do they get off!!!! My boyfriend of 8 years cheated on me and gave me an STD the dirty, r...
A. 2 July 2009: Getting the STD is the physical reality of the affair which also has a lot of shame and humiliation associated with it, its physically and emotionally confronting with a disgusting aspect to it so when you put all this pain together it made it ... (read in full...)
I'm NOT going to give him another chance but I can't leave him. What should I do?
Q. I love a boy and he love me too. we are in a relationship from the last four years. now he is ignoring me saying that he want to concentrate on his studies but one of my friends told me that she found him with a girl. after this lots of my friends ...
A. 2 July 2009: You have no choice but to move away from him. He blames you to divert attention from the real issue which is what he is doing, so don't be fooled by that trick. He has made it clear that he will not change and this tells me that he doesn't care ... (read in full...)
Texting his co-worker 30-40 times a day but says nothing is going on
Q. My husband has been texting a female co-worker at work. Sometimes a multiple of 30 times a day.She is a lot younger than he is. I found out. He swears nothing is going on. Do I believe him, or am I being stupid to think that nothing is going...
A. 30 June 2009: I think you are in pretty big trouble, he has probably already crossed the line. In this case you are justified in checking his phone messages and if he has locked it confront him without accusation but tell him that looking at the messages would ... (read in full...)
I don't trust him because he "hid" from another girl he dated before he met me!
Q. Something has been really on my mind lately and i just can't shake it. I have been dating my boyfriend for well over a year now, but i have had a problem for most of that time. It must have been on our second/third date (and my birthday) in Mar...
A. 30 June 2009: He is hiding something from you but its something you don't need to know. Its not affecting your existing relationship and as long as he loves and respects you that is all you really do need to know. The life before you is best not shared unless its ... (read in full...)
He proposed to my wife on our honeymoon!
Q. My wife loved a boy in her school days but that boy didn't accept her love. She told me this when i firstly came her home to saw her for my marriage. I was impressed with her honesty. I decided that i will marry this girl only. Then we married and ...
A. 30 June 2009: You have no need to be upset because what it showed you is how very much your wife is devoted to and loves you. The universe has provided you with a unique opportunity to see deep inside her heart so be thankful he was there....you will never see ... (read in full...)
2 years with no communication and I'm still not over my ex.
Q. Please tell me, why, after dating someone else for two and a half years I am still completely, totally, obsessed with my ex? This means checking his facebook profile nearly every night, although we are not friends so I can only see the same sma...
A. 30 June 2009: I think you could be suffering a cumpulsive disorder at the moment possibly brought on by a stressful situation, if you look back on when this started/got out of control you might find something that happened to you which distressed you to the point ... (read in full...)
9 Months... No "I Love You" Yet
Q. When has it been too long after "I love you" should have been said? I have been with my boyfriend for 9 months and we have not said it yet. I'm starting to feel it and I think he does too. I have never said it to anyone before. Anyone, I dated that ...
A. 30 June 2009: I wouldn't push it until it felt right. If he can't say it yet forcing him to in an indirect way could panic him. You say it as often as you like he will get used to the words and probably find it more easy to say when he is ready.... (read in full...)
Should I tell this new girl I'm dating I was engaged?
Q. Im going on a date with this girl i really like, and all signs point to her liking me as well, but there is a minor problem, my last realtionship that ended 2months ago i was engaged to marry her. Even though im completely over my ex and want to ...
A. 30 June 2009: You make it sound like you have done something wrong. It shows you are willing to comit, can love someone and be loved in return etc why would you worry about someone knowing that. Having said that I wouldn't say anything yet as there is no reason ... (read in full...)
Can you really still be friends after saying the "L" word?
Q. Hello, I have been friends with a girl for sometime. Then one day I decided to tell her about the feelings i had for her. don't get me wrong we are (were?) friends. I told her because it was eating me up inside and getting worse each day, and i ...
A. 29 June 2009: From her reaction it doesn't appear she wants a relationship with you in fact it seems like she was trying to put some distance between you and her. If the letter was totally unexpected by her you may have freaked her out. Next time take it in ... (read in full...)
He's hot-headed... how do I talk to him without the fighting?
Q. My fiance and i are starting to fight everyday. our sex life is fantastic and we are very much in love but he is very hot headed and jealous. I'm usually calm untill he says something smart then i get accused of being snappy. I don't know how to f...
A. 29 June 2009: Why is this happening now when it didn't before? ... (read in full...)
What kind of response did he want from me?
Q. So me and this guy were texting the other day, just like hi how are you type of stuff. Then he says "we should hang out sometime..." so I simply responded "yeah we should." I do really want to, but I didn't want to be the one to have to ask him out. ...
A. 29 June 2009: I think MANswers could be right.... (read in full...)
How do I let her know I'd like to sleep with her without offending her?
Q. Hi, I think the wife of my brother-in-law is attracted by me. I get this idea by the way she looks at me, specially when I walk by her when nobody else is around. But I am still not 100% sure. Does someone have any suggestions on how I can let ...
A. 29 June 2009: If she isn't your sister then you should treat her as if she is.... (read in full...)
He sends and receives dirty texts from random women and tells me this is normal behaviour!
Q. My bf (we've been together 5 years) looks at porn on the internet a lot (which I don't mind) BUT he also checks out adult dating sites, uses adult text messaging services to send/receive dirty texts to random women (including naked pics and texts ...
A. 29 June 2009: And you believe him? Time for a really good talk and to explore some possible options if his answers aren't good enough.... (read in full...)
How do I let her know I'd like to sleep with her without offending her?
Q. Hi, I think the wife of my brother-in-law is attracted by me. I get this idea by the way she looks at me, specially when I walk by her when nobody else is around. But I am still not 100% sure. Does someone have any suggestions on how I can let ...
A. 29 June 2009: The wife of your bother in law would be your sister....if this a joke don't waste our time.... (read in full...)
Is it possible for a man to totally lose his sex drive?
Q. is it posible for a man to toally lose sexdrive? Never think about it,or wish for it? Or is it just connected to a bad realtionship? ...
A. 29 June 2009: It is possible but the reasons can be many but that doesn't mean it can't be revived. You need to talk to him at a time and in a way that will allow him to open up and if it is not something emotional then it would be worth seeing your doctor to get ... (read in full...)
It tears me up inside knowing he has had many sexual partners.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year now and have just moved in together. The problem is that the more I fall for him the more it tears me up to know that he has had many sexual partners. Since the move, I have found (written) ...
A. 29 June 2009: The first thing you can do is stop reading his letters, they are private memories of his past and not written to be shared with you otherwise he would have given them to you to read.
Think of an intimate experience you have had with him in which... (read in full...)
I feel more for my younger boss than my husband!
Q. I have been obsessed with another man who happens to be my boss and 12 years younger. He is funny, good looking and sexy. He doesn't feel the same way about me. He is married with 3 children. My husband is disabled and our marriage is having ...
A. 29 June 2009: You need to keep talking to your councellor and work through this together as your issues are too deep seated for us to help you with here. ... (read in full...)
Does he really want a threesome, or is it just a fantasy?
Q. I am confused. My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year. We had the "fantasy" discussion. He said he wants a threesome. I asked why and he said its a fantasy. I said well I wouldn't want you to have sex with the other woman. His response ...
A. 29 June 2009: Its a fantasy, they are personal and really shouldn't be shared because they can cause confusion and hurt which is what has happened. Ask yourself if you have a fantasy you would not want to share with him because you wanted to do it, would you ... (read in full...)
Haven't heard from the guy I cheated with, what should I do?
Q. I have been in a relationship with a great man for 3 years. We love eachother and everything, but sex is out of the question. He is always working and I am always working so we barely have time for eachother. When we do have time I always try to get ...
A. 29 June 2009: In a relationship there will be lots of things happening over time, work stress, the kids will keep you so both so busy you barely see each other, exhaustion that lasts for months even more etc etc. If you can't work out how to be together now how ... (read in full...)
Naked and cuffed to the bed and now wife won't talk to me!
Q. hello,I just got married few weeks ago we are on our honeymoon..one night I decided to be kinky after dinner and decided for bondage,my wife my against being tied;so I handcuffed my self to the hotel bed..she was downstairs for dinner,so I had the ...
A. 29 June 2009: You have a lot of crawling to do..big time. ... (read in full...)
Is sex all that really matters in a relationship?
Q. is sex everything is relationship? i knew this man, we didn't go out but we were close. until he wanted to have sex. and i refused. i don't want to do it before i got married. call me old fashion but that's my belief. so he suddenly went away. and ...
A. 29 June 2009: Quite often in life we need to sift through the rubbish to find the good stuff and what you met is just some of the rubbish. ... (read in full...)
Should I stay? Or get rid of the hoe?
Q. Ok here is the story I have been dating this girl for two yrs and she hasn't ever spent any real time wit me. if im lucky I get to see her lik 5 hrs every 2 weeks and she says she is busy but she will cancel or plans to make time for her friends and ...
A. 29 June 2009: Two and a half hours a week with someone who really doesn't want to spend much time with you sounds like the relationship is already at an end. Find someone who can't wait till the end of the day to see you and who doesn't even want to kiss her ... (read in full...)
Drunked one night stand!
Q. I had a so called "One Night Stand" a week ago, we did not have sex, but it got really intimate. He was really drunk and I had drank three beers which was my limit. I was worried about this guy because he did not have a ride home so I gave him a ...
A. 29 June 2009: Sounds like he was too drunk to notice anyway. I can't see what you did that was so wrong and you sent a few cold emails that you felt you needed to do to protect yourself emotionally you have a right to do that. The only person who thinks badly of ... (read in full...)
What the hell is her ex trying to accomplish?
Q. My girlfriends ex told her that he likes her. They were together maybe 2 months and nothing serious. We're together 7 now. He told her 2 weeks ago or so. Recently then, he was talking to her friend and said to her "i want to tell her again incase ...
A. 28 June 2009: This flirty behaviour could have reiginited his feelings but you have told her of your concern, her response was positive and you were happy about that and thats fine unless you see any more flirty photos but unless you do I would accept her ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend threw a chair across the room!! What do I do?
Q. My boyfriend of 3 years just threw a chair across the room because he got mad that I was questioning him about an online account he has. We live together now for 6 months and in the entire 3 years he has NEVER throw anything, let alone a chair!!! ...
A. 28 June 2009: There is no excuse for extreme physical responses that put you at risk either physically or emotionally. If this is the way he reacts to 'work stress' then what does the future hold if work stress gets more stressful as may other stresses that will ... (read in full...)
Mixed feelings about my ex's problems. Why is he turning to me for help?
Q. can anyone teach me how to fight depression? I am so depressed right now, i dont know why..i dont understand how i feel. my ex informed me days ago that he is in trouble with the girl he left me for. i don't know..maybe they broke up. the thing...
A. 28 June 2009: No need to be depressed or jealous as he is past history, remember he dumped you which severly affected your happiness and thrown your life in a spin. Don't chase something that isn't worth going after. Whatever happened is his problem and you ... (read in full...)
A woman scorned -- is she ever gonna leave me alone?
Q. Well im in a situation, i had a married woman at work who wanted to have an affair with me. I was very attracted to her and it took alot of resisting on my part to get away. She wouldnt let go, she wouldnt stop playing "games" with me at work....
A. 28 June 2009: As she now has another victim she could be a serial offender. Such a person can be bitter and make life impossible but it may also mean she has a reputation for such behaviour or known as someone to be aware of so to speak, so you may have some ... (read in full...)
He only has sex with me when he's drunk. What's going on?
Q. My fella and I have sex only when he’s drunk and I’m beginning to wonder if he’s gay. He’s a lovely guy, but makes no attempt to touch me when he’s sober. We don’t kiss, cuddle or hold hands. Some nights we sit and watch TV at either ends...
A. 28 June 2009: Best to move on if you can, the way he treats you is unlikely to change and the fact that his previous relationships have only lasted a few months should tell you that it is a deep seated problem and one you will not solve easily or at all. If you ... (read in full...)
Lost libido after the menopause and his porn addiction is making it worse. What do I do?
Q. I'm practically a newlywed, less then 2 yrs. This our 3rd. We are 48 and 56. We met online and it was a whirlwind. Here is the problem. I've menopaused and lost most of my libido. My husband, who is a gorgeous man, is prescibed meds that cause ed...
A. 28 June 2009: All isn't well at all. He has become addicted to porn and is unlikely to stop unless he gets assistance but you won't be able to do this on your own. Your initial step should be to see a marriage councellor by yourself as its very unlikely he will ... (read in full...)
After we are intimate I feel guilty and ashamed
Q. I am 23 years old and have a serious boyfriend for the first time. My problem is that, I feel very guilty after being intimate with my boyfriend of 5 months. We are very sure that we do not want to have sex before marriage. But, we do kiss or ...
A. 28 June 2009: You will need to talk to him, he will not feel he has violated you so don't worry. If you don't your distress will surface in the relationship itself which you don't want. Your concern probably needs the help of a professional therapist and you ... (read in full...)
Had a threesome with friends, afraid I'm falling in love
Q. I just had a threesome with 2 of my best friends who are engaged to each other. I thought I could be ok with it, but now I'm finding that I have strong feelings toward him. He's made it quite clear that he has no interest in leaving his partner, ...
A. 28 June 2009: He is a complete no go zone, any approach and you will lose both friends and as it is now any more attention to him and he could walk. It will take time but unfortunately it means not spending so much time with them anymore.... (read in full...)
Am I naive for believing my ex isn't just after sex? are all guys only after one thing?
Q. How do guys think? What am I not getting? I have recently been in contact with a sort-of ex (unofficial relationship) and he wants to meet up to 'discuss things'. My friend, when I told him, was angry at this. According to him, all my ex wants ...
A. 27 June 2009: An ex is an ex and once separated is generally best kept at a distance. You have caring friends who love you and are obviously worried about you. Unless there is a great need to see him then why bother.... (read in full...)
It feels like her love for me is fading, is there anyway I can restore it?
Q. Hi...I have a situation that I don't know how to turn it around. I'm currently in a long distance relationship. I'm in a different country then my girl. I have been away from her for close to 7 months now. We would video chat almost everyday ...
A. 27 June 2009: There is nothing you can do until she gets back when you meet you will see if her spark for you is still there. I am surprised you two have been able to keep a distance relationship going for so long. If anything has changed it would be hard to ... (read in full...)
Why am I feeling jealous when I totally trust him?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for a year now and have never had any problems, i trust him 100%. But I still get very jealous when has around other girls. For example, his ex girlfriend was in his house last night (She is his house mates ...
A. 27 June 2009: I don't know if you would call it jealousl or been worried that someone might take the opportunity to chat him up which then leads to the possibility of him straying from you. Given the surroundings and the opportunities I can understand your ... (read in full...)
Will he marry me? I'm so confused!
Q. My boyfriend was perfect for two years. suddenly he went back in his hometown and after come back he stared ignoring me and didn't want to talked with me too much and one day he said , he don't want to be with me anymore and after one week I heard ...
A. 27 June 2009: Put marriage aside for the moment I suspect if you push it he will run so You will more time to assess the situation. when he found someone else he dumped you and possibly came back because it didn't work. My concern is the way he simply walked away ... (read in full...)
Having problems with my girl - I need your help!
Q. My girlfrien has been acting funny, we went from talking and texting like crazy to no it seems like she is just talking to me, to make me happy. She went on a 3 day trip for work and said "don't know if I will have time to call during the trip" What ...
A. 27 June 2009: Texting hasn't been working so leave her alone for a while, don't text at all and see what happens. Pretty soon you'll get an idea about what to do next. ... (read in full...)
Beautiful with a small chest...is this a problem (just asking)
Q. Beautiful with a small chest...is that a problem? Just asking because... I recently found out that my boyfriend of pretty much 4 years and the father of my child has a big breast porn fetish that he has been hiding for some time. When I leave, he...
A. 26 June 2009: Everyone has certain preferences eg generally speaking men have a liking for 'pin up' type girls like those in playboy etc its a look that we are hard wired to recognise, it has a lot to do with our primeval past where for the purposes of survival ... (read in full...)
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