If he's interested, he'll ask me out again, right?
Q. I went out with a guy this past Sunday. Tonight he asked me if I wanted to go to this place tomorrow with him in the day time, but I can't because I have to work. So I texted him something like "stuck at work till 8..would definately go with you ...
A. 11 July 2009: Definately. Expect a call soon.... (read in full...)
What to do to contact the woman you had sex with?
Q. The next day after having sex with a woman that you totally like and are attracted to what is expected? Should the guy drop her a email or text, call her, or send her a card? What kind of things should be said? Thank you? I liked it? I want it ag...
A. 11 July 2009: Your asking too many questions just call and ask her out again, tell her how much you enjoyed being with her last night and let her take it from there.... (read in full...)
Can I ask her out or is she 'off-limits'?
Q. Hi, I asked not too long ago about a good gift for a female co-worker for her b-day. Well I got something for her, and she really liked it. Like her expression showed it the whole day. A few days ago, I heard some bad news that implied she was ...
A. 11 July 2009: Time is on your side there is no rush. Better to ask her at the right time then to do it in a rush at the wrong time. Be cool, your the man.... (read in full...)
He says if I don't sleep with him, he won't help with our children
Q. heres the story: about 5 months ago my live-in boyfriend of 5 years left me. He instantly had a gf (which leads me to believe he was seeing her before the break up, altho he denies it) anyway, we keep in touch bc we have to, as we have children ...
A. 11 July 2009: Threatening to suicide in some cases can be a form of emotional blackmail so don't be drawn into his manipulation. You should be proud of what you have achieved so far.... (read in full...)
I'm dating a younger girl and want to do the right thing for a respectful relationship...
Q. Please tell me what to do. I have been chatting with a girl who is lovely, mature and beautiful. she is 15 years younger and im not worried about that. we connect meaningfully over several (shes not in the same town) lengthy (3h+ phone calls) con...
A. 9 July 2009: I would take this at face value and accept her explanation. If there is further reason to doubt later on then deal with that then but this should end speculation for now at least. Now relax.... (read in full...)
Her stories aren't adding up and I think there's alot going on that I don't know about
Q. Hi I am in a 3 month relationship that was going good till a few weeks ago. Recently my girl has stopped anwering calls and texts. She does get back to me after awhile but its weird. She was supposed to work one day and she left my house for ...
A. 9 July 2009: You haven't been together very long so its not like you are both totally committed (not being horrible). Her irritability with you and anger regarding accusations you haven't made are the tell all big red flags. One way to tell where you stand is to ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him I cheated
Q. heyyy i'm 19 and I have a boyfriend of a year who I absolutely LOVEE!! I couldnt imagine my life with out him... but something happened about a week ago that I just can't get off of my conscience. I was at a party and I accidentally hooked up with a ...
A. 9 July 2009: Your choice is your conscience or your relationship, work out which one you want to live with. ... (read in full...)
Should I feel guilty? Can my friend and I remain friends? I'm trying to save my marriage!
Q. I have been married for over 12 years. During this time, my husband has been unfaithful, or has tried to be unfaithful, numerous times. He has a lot of fidelity issues and the person I once considered my best friend is not the same. During all his ...
A. 9 July 2009: Your relationship with this other person seems to have given you the confidence to confront your husband which led to him getting help for his behaviour. If your relationship is saved because of this connection with this other person then I can't ... (read in full...)
I married but want to be with others
Q. I have been married for almost three years. I do love my husband, but there has been many times when I find myself wanting to be with other people. Is that normal?...
A. 9 July 2009: Guys spend most of of their lives fantasying about other women but never do anything more then enjoy the ride. Incorporate some of the fantasies (mind only) into your love making and it could help make your love life more interesting and keep ... (read in full...)
Being accused by my lover
Q. I have a problem being accused by my lover. He thinks I am cheating him with my ex just because he see me sitting on the porch with my homegirl and him. What should I do?...
A. 9 July 2009: Jealous partners are always difficult to deal with because their thinking is often irrational. Assure him once again but not twice, be very strong and firm about it, if you are winey you will sound like you are cheating.... (read in full...)
Can I ask her out or is she 'off-limits'?
Q. Hi, I asked not too long ago about a good gift for a female co-worker for her b-day. Well I got something for her, and she really liked it. Like her expression showed it the whole day. A few days ago, I heard some bad news that implied she was ...
A. 9 July 2009: There is no reason to ask her if she is seeing someone she isn't married or anything like that so just ask her out.... (read in full...)
I'm just scared to death he's going to rip me apart again like he did just seven months ago!
Q. Hi, my ex and I broke up seven months ago for the second and final time after a two-year relationship. We broke up because he was a douche who emotionally abused me and I just couldn't take it anymore. But at the same time, we had some really nice ...
A. 9 July 2009: If this is the nature of how you both interact it won't change so imagine living with severe emotional and possible physical abuse for the rest of your life then imagine what it would be like when he treats you like this in front of the kids and ... (read in full...)
My father is calling this incest!
Q. Hey. Iv been with this guy a month then my father starts saying his my cousin and calls me insest and everything and its really annoying me, iv tried telling him to stop but he wont listen. The past 4years he has be making my life misrable and i d...
A. 9 July 2009: Your dad obviously loves you and may be worried about you growing up too quickly and getting too serious too early. ... (read in full...)
I'm dating a younger girl and want to do the right thing for a respectful relationship...
Q. Please tell me what to do. I have been chatting with a girl who is lovely, mature and beautiful. she is 15 years younger and im not worried about that. we connect meaningfully over several (shes not in the same town) lengthy (3h+ phone calls) con...
A. 9 July 2009: Relax and stop analysing everything.... (read in full...)
I checked on my ex because I heard he was seeing another girl
Q. Hi I broke up with my boyfriend that I have been seeing on and off for the past 4 years he treated me terrible not just terrible but how noone should ever be treated! he sprayed me in the face with pepper spray, he slit all my tires, he called me ...
A. 9 July 2009: If you can't pull yourself away from this scumbag then what do you think the rest of your life holds for you. Move on or see a psycharist to help you do it.... (read in full...)
I hurt him, cheated and now want him back
Q. I was in a long distant relationship for 2 years with my bestfriend of 4 years and I cheated on him with my ex-boyfriend. When my fiance finally came home he broke up with me. He says he does not see me the way he once did. We continued to hang out ...
A. 6 July 2009: The loss of trust is one of the hardest things to repair and sometimes it doesn't completely heal. There are no guarantees here for you there is no quick solution. If it comes It will take time, a lot of time and even then he will probably still be ... (read in full...)
Can you really still be friends after saying the "L" word?
Q. Hello, I have been friends with a girl for sometime. Then one day I decided to tell her about the feelings i had for her. don't get me wrong we are (were?) friends. I told her because it was eating me up inside and getting worse each day, and i ...
A. 5 July 2009: Thats great news.... (read in full...)
I thought my husband was working in a call centre or factory...but he is a lap dancer in a gay club!
Q. I found out off a long-time family friend (male) of ours, who's a taxi-driver, about my husband's nightshift job. We've been married for 3 months now. I am aware that my husband worked nights, he changed job to a nightshift one a year-and-a-ha...
A. 5 July 2009: Who signs on as anonymous but then signs out with a name...think your wasting our time.... (read in full...)
If it's okay for men to meet visual and sexual needs through porn then surely its okay for married women to date and go on romantic outings with other men to have their romance 'needs' met?
Q. I often hear men (and some women) claim that porn is ok for men within relationships because they are 'visual' and only seeking thrills....etc If this is the case and these people like to stereotype then the other side of this argument is that wom...
A. 5 July 2009: Why can't they hold hands while he watches porn that way they will both be happy (just thought we need to lighten this up a bit)... (read in full...)
What could possibly be the problem?
Q. I'm only married over a year and already, to me I feel as if my marriage ruined my relationship. My husband and I are living with family until our own place is ready but we basically just share a bed. There are days we wake up pass each other, go to ...
A. 5 July 2009: Time to move out of the family home. If he was affectionate and intimate before you moved into the family home then he is uncomfortable showing affection in front of family members, I bet you don't have much if any sex either. Once he is used to ... (read in full...)
My cousin and I want a baby, what is the next step?
Q. me and my causin had sex withot comdoms and sometimes we use them but we love so mush each other and we want to be together doing our lifes together and we have thinking about having a baby but we are worried that the baby its going to have bad ...
A. 5 July 2009: Given that you live in Iraq I don't think its the baby who will have the difficulties.... (read in full...)
Should I give my dad a chance?
Q. hey everyone, well here's the story my dad tried to kick me and my mum out of his house when i was 6 months old my mum fought against it and we ended up staying there until i was around 9 years old, he never had contact with me or mum after he lef...
A. 5 July 2009: I find it hard to believe that he couldn't find you all these years even though you stayed in the same area but happened to see your ad on a local website. The coincidence is hard to believe and makes me think that you might be conned by someone ... (read in full...)
I've fallen for my co-worker...but I'm married with 2 children
Q. what do i do next , iam married with 2 chldren but i have been seeing someone else who is also in relationship ,. but i have fallen for him and cant get him out of my mind. but when iam with him its so comfortable and i fancy him we have slept ...
A. 5 July 2009: He is getting free sex without commitment, enjoying your infatuated attention and knows your hooked and unlikely to leave. So expect his continuing smile, a wink in his eye and that bright smile turned up at one side, as he will continue to ... (read in full...)
Really forgiven or a panacea for her pain?
Q. I have been married for 25 yrs. My wife is 57 and I am 45. Our marriage has gon stale in the last 5 yrs, which led to me seeking love elsewhere. I left my wife and the other woman to start a new life. My wife found out about the affair since ...
A. 5 July 2009: You haven't said if you are still with the other women and not mentioned if you want to get back with your wife so its difficult to make a comment.... (read in full...)
Our marriage had been neglected, she started seeing another man, How do I deal with this?
Q. i have been in a relatinonship for nearly 20years with my partner we have had 3 children 2 boys 18-16 and a girl 5.i have had mental health problems since before we met and gradualy got worse over the years and i have neglected her by never showing ...
A. 5 July 2009: Hoping that life opens another door that is filled with the happiness and love you desire but also now prepared to give. Good Luck... (read in full...)
Was this really nothing, or is she the most ridiculous person ever? Why is she like this?
Q. I don't know if this is a bigger deal that it should be? My girlfriend is kind of shy, but also kind of picky. People tease her about both these things sometimes, even I do. I think she might have a complex, but I honestly don't understand why s...
A. 4 July 2009: She is more like you then you realise. You treat her like crap and she makes you sleep in another room for 3 nights doesn't talk to you for two days and tells you to piss off, sounds pretty assertive to me. The next step could be to beat the crap ... (read in full...)
Step brother lover...
Q. This is actually quite hard for me to do, i am and have been deeply in love with my step brother for over 20 years. our parents were together when we were three till 13. he never lived with us and only stopped over once a month. our parents had kids ...
A. 4 July 2009: You have made a very big mistake and need to move on otherwise you could be hurt again but this time even more so. A relationship of this kind is socially taboo and you will both need to be strong to survive, he has shown that he does not have that ... (read in full...)
His insecurity is killing our connection with each other
Q. well im 17 and i've been in a relationship w/ my boyfriend for 2 years now and he's still insecure..i don't know what to do.I love him and i want to spend the rest of my life with him..but i feel like i can't have any friends casue he's insecure..i ...
A. 3 July 2009: If you feel cut off from your friends and argue about things that relate to jelousy or being possessive then you need to find another person to love who trusts you and wants you to have as many friends as you want.... (read in full...)
My guy is more conservative and this is driving me nuts
Q. my boyfriend and i have been on and off constantly for 2 years now. we keep breaking up because he's not 'touchy'...he wont even hold my hand or kiss me or put his arm around me or anything. we text each other like nonstop and he always tells me ...
A. 3 July 2009: Its been 2 years and if he hasn't been touchy feelie...so why are you still with him?... (read in full...)
How can I divide the time between my friends and family?
Q. I am having trouble talking to my family. My family and I use to be so close but now.. I hang with my friends and I do anything to not hang out with them. My dad always tells me that I am drifting away from him. that I'm not his "little girl" ...
A. 3 July 2009: Your getting older and they know that means you will want to spend more time with your friends which is normal. They are trying to hold on to you for as long as they can, they obviously love you a lot. Just make sure that are there when it is ... (read in full...)
He is scared of starting a relationship with me it seems
Q. Ok I am confused. What does it mean when a guy calls you often, let's say 3 to 4 time in a week, tells you a lot about his life plans and secrets but never asks you out. I have known him for almost 2 months now and he makes me feel like we are close ...
A. 3 July 2009: I would say that he likes you except for the fact that he keeps cancelling your dates, it shouldn't be so hard just to go to the movies together. Sounds like he just wants someone to talk to.. and talk to.. and talk to.... (read in full...)
I have massive trust issues and can't tell what love really is
Q. i am just wondering how can you tell if a guy really loves his girlfriend. i have trust issues so i'm just wondering if there are any signs to tell if guys really love there girlfriends or if there just trying to get laid. i have been in 4 different ...
A. 3 July 2009: Its more about how he treats you. The word love is so easily used and so easily said and is therefore hard to detect its truth. How he treats you, cares for you talks to you shows you off to his friends and can't wait to take you home to meet his ... (read in full...)
Our marriage had been neglected, she started seeing another man, How do I deal with this?
Q. i have been in a relatinonship for nearly 20years with my partner we have had 3 children 2 boys 18-16 and a girl 5.i have had mental health problems since before we met and gradualy got worse over the years and i have neglected her by never showing ...
A. 3 July 2009: I know things have been tough for you but 20 years without love is also tough. If you get a second chance you will be lucky but keeping her once she has seen the beauty of the other side will mean becoming someone you haven't been. ... (read in full...)
I hurt her by fooling around on SMS, help me!
Q. i love my lecturer and she loves me too... we are more than sisiter and brother both are non separable but i hurt her by fooling through sms she is upset but she is not expressing it how shall i convince her??? please for god sake help me. i lo...
A. 3 July 2009: It would be hard to trust you again as long as you had a mobile phone in your hand...sorry.... (read in full...)
I don't think he realises that these lies to his mother are starting to erode my trust in him...
Q. I have been with my partner for 2 years. He is in his mid thirties. He is currently working extremely hard to save enough money so that we can move in together. However, there is one problem that I don't know how to approach. When my partne...
A. 3 July 2009: He must stop using you as an excuse. Not letting you know when he was using you as an excuse has put your future relationship with his mother at risk. If your relationship with him becomes permanent and somehow his mother found out what has been ... (read in full...)
I've had 4 sexual partners, is that a lot for a woman my age?
Q. I'm 23 and have had 4 sexual partners. Is that a lot for a woman my age? My last ex told me during our break up that guys will think I'm really slutty now that I've been with 4 different men, but he might've been trying to make me feel bad. ...
A. 3 July 2009: Some people would say that you are still a virgin.... (read in full...)
There was some miscommunication between us and he's stressing over it
Q. Yesterday night after I got off from work I went to a movie, and after it was over I texted my boyfriend saying I'll stop by his house since he was just getting off work. Well I was planning on having sex with him before I left but when he got back ...
A. 3 July 2009: He clearly had a really tough day and as he got home after midnight and up again at 6am he was grumpy, irritable and unable to think clearly. In this situation I wouldn't read into his responses too deeply. Wait and see how he is after a really good ... (read in full...)
My wife is having an affair, she refuses to attend counselling...help?
Q. About a week ago I found out my wife was having an affair. We had been married for 24 years and had lived together prior to this for a further 3 years since we were 19. I found out from txts on her phone, she admitted it straight away but said she ...
A. 2 July 2009: You sound a lovely person who had the perfect life and now absolutely devastated and lost for a solution. See the councellor first if there are solutions it will probably come from there as it will give you a chance to offload and get things in ... (read in full...)
Just found out he's married and unsure of what to do. I don't want to be his bit on the side!
Q. I've been having an affair with a married man, although not for the usual reasons. Before people criticise me, I didn't know he was married at all - not one bit. In fact I didn't even know until now, as on Sunday night we were at the pub ...
A. 2 July 2009: You can only take it one person at a time, of course men to have had similar experiences with women (although some readers won't believe that) so its not a man specific problem. Its more about relationships and finding the person who will fit best ... (read in full...)
Should I follow my heart and try to rescue what me and this woman had or try to work it out with my wife?
Q. hello all, need ur help. About 3 months ago I left my wife cause of infedality issues with her (not me). I work at a hospital and there was this one woman who i had taken a liking to. We started seeing eachother and it turned into more than I had ...
A. 2 July 2009: Never make a life changing decision on a rebound particularly one as brief as yours. The high you receive from a new partner you connect with after the pain of an affair and separation is often out of proportion to the reality of a longer term ... (read in full...)
Could he not like me because I'm "too good" for him?
Q. Heyyyzz i have one simple question im not trying to sound snotty but could i possibly be too "good" for a guy?? Could he not like me because im pretty or because i wear make up or am " high matinence" if you will...... Just wonderin...
A. 2 July 2009: Some guys can be intimdated by an attractive woman particularly if you are a big attention seeker who is also very outgoing with lots of friends and very popular with lots of girl and guy friends. It can feel like there is too much competition even ... (read in full...)
Can you really still be friends after saying the "L" word?
Q. Hello, I have been friends with a girl for sometime. Then one day I decided to tell her about the feelings i had for her. don't get me wrong we are (were?) friends. I told her because it was eating me up inside and getting worse each day, and i ...
A. 29 June 2009: From her reaction it doesn't appear she wants a relationship with you in fact it seems like she was trying to put some distance between you and her. If the letter was totally unexpected by her you may have freaked her out. Next time take it in ... (read in full...)
He says if I don't sleep with him, he won't help with our children
Q. heres the story: about 5 months ago my live-in boyfriend of 5 years left me. He instantly had a gf (which leads me to believe he was seeing her before the break up, altho he denies it) anyway, we keep in touch bc we have to, as we have children ...
A. 22 June 2009: What a complete jerk, a lowlife. His behaviour is repugnant to all that is decent in a human being. Yes you are right he is blackmailing you to become his prostitute. Someone like this should not be looking after your kids anyway as anyone who ... (read in full...)
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