Was I wrong to delete my ex and his friends and family from my social media?
Q. Hello everyone! I wanted to post here because I’m looking for advice, yesterday I unfollowed my ex from all social media, and I blocked him on WhatsApp. Also, I deleted his family and friends from Instagram. This was a huge step for me. It makes...
A. 20 September 2023: Let me ask you something. Would you read a book you had read before and expect a different ending? Would you watch a film you had watched before and expect it to end differently? Of course not, because that is just illogical. So why do you keep ... (read in full...)
A for sale sign has caused much tension between neighbors
Q. So I want to start off by saying that I’m not one to suffer with anxiety and I’ve always considered myself strong and able to move on when rubbish happens but something that has happened recently has made me feel quite vulnerable…. I live in...
A. 13 September 2023: I worked for estate agents up till very recently and I'm sorry but your story just doesn't add up.
For a start, the potential purchasers would have the details from the estate agent when they made the appointment to view so would know which ho... (read in full...)
Is he depressed, toxic or is it me ruining the relationship as he says it is.
Q. I moved in with my partner a year ago and things are becoming toxic in our relationship. I walk on eggshells most days with him. I am always trying to make him happy and putting him first. He’s a very negative person (glass always half empty) blames ...
A. 13 September 2023: Of course he would love you to believe it is you ruining the relationship, because nothing is HIS fault. Little wonder he has no friends and even his brother has distanced himself from him.
Get out before you start believing his BS. You already ... (read in full...)
How can I let my Kenyan friend down without hurting him?
Q. Hello, I used to communicate alot with someone from Kenya years ago. I considered him to be a good online friend. However, I got into a relationship with someone and we didn't talk as much. Recently he messaged me and I'm now single a...
A. 11 September 2023: Beware people who have never met you telling you they are "in love" with you. Lucky you are level headed and independent. If you were insecure and feeling vulnerable after your break-up, you might fall for his patter.
You two have differen... (read in full...)
How to let him down gently
Q. Before the summer, I ask my ex to give me some space as i was feeling overwhelmed by our interactions. It felt very unbalanced, as he was in love with me then and I wasn’t with him. He wanted to keep having long talks but for me I really needed to ...
A. 9 September 2023: You realize you don't have to have "a talk" just because it is what he wants? If you have definitely decided this relationship is over, the kindest thing to do is to end it firmly and cleanly.
I would send him a message saying, after having h... (read in full...)
My mum's friend is a bad customer
Q. I’m really annoyed at my mums friend for messing me about and also at my mum as she is siding with her friend!!! Last year i started making and selling some items- jewelry, hats, bags etc… My mums friend who I’ve only met a handful of times...
A. 9 September 2023: It's your business, not your mother's. Frankly, in your shoes, I would delete and block your mother's friend on Facebook so she cannot browse your items. If she tries to get something through your mother, tell her every item she wants has already ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my brother and his wife that I'm moving out of state?
Q. My brother, his wife and I live on the same street. My brother and I have always been close. I am single and work from home. I rent while my brother owns his home. About 4 months ago, my brother and sister-in-law announced that the...
A. 9 September 2023: It is not your fault that your brother and his wife assumed you would be the resident baby minder. You have your own life to live. It sounds like you kept quiet when these expectations were voiced. It would have been far easier if you had said ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my brother and his wife that I'm moving out of state?
Q. My brother, his wife and I live on the same street. My brother and I have always been close. I am single and work from home. I rent while my brother owns his home. About 4 months ago, my brother and sister-in-law announced that the...
A. 9 September 2023: Test... (read in full...)
I'm wondering whether I made the right decision in changing gynocologists. What do you guys think?
Q. I'm wondering whether I made the right decision in changing gynocologists. What do you guys think? I have a polyp. My usual specialist is away, so I booked with another. I'm sitting in the waiting room and a man phones to ask if he can spea...
A. 30 August 2023: She sounds like a bit of a loose cannon and totally unprofessional. If you feel uncomfortable in a situation, it is your gut instinct trying to protect you and telling you to get out of there. You know what you need to do. ... (read in full...)
My friend chose her friend with kids over me, who has no kids!
Q. 5 months ago my friend and I took her 8 year old twins for a day out, for a picnic. On our way there my friend told me that another friend of hers (a mother from the twins school) with her 2 kids would be joining us. I’ve only met this w...
A. 27 August 2023: I would play your friend at her own game if she contacts you again. If she tries to make arrangements to go out, say you will be in touch, just as she did, and then don't bother, just as she did.
She broke your trust when she lied to you. Lea... (read in full...)
When close friends enter relationships, sometimes I feel they change and I lose interest
Q. Dear Cupid, I have very close platonic friendships and I'm queer human. Until now my life has been populated by close platonic queer friendships and sex with strangers. Often I've seen close friends enter into committed, rather traditional romantic ...
A. 20 August 2023: Maybe the secret is to have lots of your own interests so you are not as reliant on your friends for your entertainment? I only have a small number of friends but each one adds something good to my life. None of them ARE my life. If they go through ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend lied and I feel like our intimacy is diminishing
Q. My girlfriend is pregnant first trimester. We havent been doing sexually anything and its frustrating but im trying to be considerate. I know my girlfriend watches porn. I asked her a few times and ive tried talking to her that its ok to tell m...
A. 19 August 2023: You don't own your girlfriend. She is not cheating on you by "playing with herself". To be honest, I am not surprised she does not want to be intimate with you if you are this controlling. A woman needs to feel loved before she wants sex. Think ... (read in full...)
When close friends enter relationships, sometimes I feel they change and I lose interest
Q. Dear Cupid, I have very close platonic friendships and I'm queer human. Until now my life has been populated by close platonic queer friendships and sex with strangers. Often I've seen close friends enter into committed, rather traditional romantic ...
A. 19 August 2023: You seem to be an "all or nothing" person. Not saying you are wrong to be like that but, for me, friendships can ebb and flow, and sometimes they are more intense than at other times. If someone has a new partner in their life, it is only natural ... (read in full...)
When close friends enter relationships, sometimes I feel they change and I lose interest
Q. Dear Cupid, I have very close platonic friendships and I'm queer human. Until now my life has been populated by close platonic queer friendships and sex with strangers. Often I've seen close friends enter into committed, rather traditional romantic ...
A. 19 August 2023: Test... (read in full...)
Why is my fwb being so disrespectful
Q. I've been seeing a FWB for sometime. We do things together. Hang out, go out in his boat, go to dinner sometimes. Lately he seems irritated by something. We went to his condo on the beach in his truck. It was really a hot day. I asked if he could ...
A. 19 August 2023: He's so disrespectful because he wants out of this "partnership" but hasn't got the balls to end it. He hopes, by him being nasty, you will do the dirty work for him and walk away.
Do him and yourself a favour and walk away with your head hel... (read in full...)
Writer friend uses me as inspiration but it hits too close to home.
Q. I'm a writer who is friends with another writer. Over the course of the last year, this friend has proven extremely kind, generous, and patient with me. Has taught me many things and throughout this time I've always asked what he got from my side ...
A. 13 August 2023: In fairness, all writers need inspiration from somewhere. They don't just "make up" stuff they write; it had to start somewhere. Personally, I would be flattered that my friend thought enough of me to write my story. He finds your story - and, by ... (read in full...)
I left my abusive partner so why do I feel bad?
Q. I have just left my partner of two years who was emotionally abusive. I have felt unhappy for months living with him but why do I feel even more unhappy without him? Before I met him I was a happy, lived my best life. Now I feel like a shell of my ...
A. 13 August 2023: You miss the person you wanted him to be, not the person he actually turned out to be. It is possible he WAS the person you wanted him to be at the beginning but nobody can keep up a show forever; eventually their true self will out.
You also mis... (read in full...)
Is my friend a freeloader?
Q. I need some opinions to work out if my friend is a freeloader… For as long as I have known her- 8 years she has always struggled with money- she works full time but doesn’t save anything and doesnt think about what she spends and where. W...
A. 13 August 2023: Why not suggest seeing her somewhere cheap and cheerful, where you can both afford your bill without struggling? A Wetherspoons or similar?
You can come across as a "lovely person" and still be entitled. ... (read in full...)
Is the crush fading?
Q. The most senior staff in my child's school has a crush on me. The attraction is mutual. Please don't ask me ' how do I know as I have passed that stage. The signs were so obvious i,e there was one or two things that he did that was unprofes...
A. 13 August 2023: Why don't you discuss it with your husband? I am sure, as soon as he knows and your marriage is in danger, your "crush" will fade. ... (read in full...)
Shall I confront my neighbor or not?
Q. My neighbor, on several occasion, whilst I have been away has looked after my indoor rabbits. I’ve never had any issues with her coming to my house and looking after them. My bunnies have their own allocated big room downstairs which is rabb...
A. 13 August 2023: While I do understand you saying the rabbits should not be in other parts of the house which have not been made safe for them, I assume the neighbour and child were with them the whole time they were out of their safe space so it was highly unlikely ... (read in full...)
Competitive cousin is making me jealous!
Q. My cousin and I are the same age (literally a few months apart) and ever since we were small she has always been competitive with me. She’d always want what I had or wanted to do things I did like ballet and swimming and then try to beat...
A. 22 July 2023: Poor little rich girl. I can understand her being jealous of you, but what does she have for YOU to be jealous of? Constant insecurity, which drives her need to compete, and her step-daddy's money? Sheesh. (I am rolling my eyes here.)
I think th... (read in full...)
Should I text him and ask where we stand or should I end it?
Q. My boyfriend asked me for space and time after we had a misunderstanding and it’s been a month now of no contact. When I see him at public events he stares at me when he thinks I’m not looking but he makes no effort to come talk to me and doesn’t ...
A. 17 July 2023: "Closure" is grossly over-rated. Make your own closure by deciding, right here, right now, that it's over, because it is. Don't get drawn into contacting him to "finish" with him. He didn't have the backbone to end things properly and cleanly. He's ... (read in full...)
I told my friend she was my forever crush girl
Q. I told my friend through text she is my forever girl crush (I am also a girl) and she didn’t say anything. She usually responds to my text within an hour or less. I have explained it means someone you admire etc. is she uncomfortable did I freak her ...
A. 15 July 2023: Why would you send a text like that to your friend? As I understand the term "crush", it refers to someone towards whom you have romantic feelings. Perhaps you understand it differently? Perhaps your friend understands it differently? Whatever, I ... (read in full...)
He's a millionaire but says money is tight. Is he testing me?
Q. I’ve been divorced for 2 years. Separated in 2019. I haven’t dated in many years. Now it’s online dating which is daunting and sometimes intimidating. I’m aware this question is ignorant and judgmental. Please go easy on me. I met another divorcee ...
A. 10 July 2023: If he tells you his money is "tied up" and asks to borrow some until his funds are available, run and don't look back, lol. ... (read in full...)
Partner had surgery and hasn't touched me since then yet does all kinds of work for friends
Q. I am so frustrated and feel like leaving my partner. Me and my partner moved in together 1 year ago after he had heart surgery. We had been together 10 years. I feel I have been very accomodatong and patient. He has not come near me in any way sinc...
A. 8 July 2023: Everyone has a breaking point and you sound like you have reached yours. You say "I can't cope anymore!"
If you love this man and don't really want to leave, have one last ditch attempt at saving the relationship. Will he go with you for counsell... (read in full...)
Friend got birth control and lied
Q. My friend Lex I just found out rode her bike to what's basically an abortion clinic and got birth control. She told her parents she was with me and I almost got in trouble for lying for her when I knew nothing about it. Luckily I was at work like I ...
A. 5 July 2023: Nothing is "wrong" with your friend. She is just making her own way in life as best she can. Whether you share her views is irrelevant. Unless you think she is in danger (perhaps from someone older pressuring her for sex), why would you tell her ... (read in full...)
Friend is annoyed that I can’t increase my budget for her daughters birthday gift!
Q. ? It was my friends daughters 7th birthday and I bought her a present of a particular tv cartoon character that she loves. The present cost me £25. Just to note- I asked her mum what she would like and her mum told me to get her this. W...
A. 2 July 2023: Your "friend" is entitled and greedy. In your shoes, I would not pursue this relationship any further. The ball's now in her court. If she doesn't get in touch, leave things be. You don't owe her anything. ... (read in full...)
Does he want more than friendship or am I imagining it?
Q. ? ? ?Hi, I need some advice to see what’s happening. I e been working in my current company for 12 years and there this one guy in particular who managed this particular branch and is based about 90 minutes away from us. I used to deal...
A. 2 July 2023: Lady, you are playing with fire and, if you don't step back, you will get burned. Run this situation past your husband and ask him for HIS advice. ... (read in full...)
Guy found out I don't shave and now he has everyone making fun of me
Q. A guy I was sort of talking to (not flirting) and we kept getting pushed together. Friends would push us into conversations and make excuses for us to accidentally meet up but they did it on purpose. I sort of liked him and he made me laugh. Well, ...
A. 2 July 2023: You had a lucky escape. Don't put yourself in a situation again where you could be vulnerable. You are lucky things didn't go further than they did. Believe me, you will look back on this episode in your life and be grateful.
P.S. Izzie is not y... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's 10 year old daughter is coming between us
Q. Hi I am with my bf he’s frum Dublin I feel like she is trying to keep him away frum me she is only 10 I feel like I’m in the middle between me and his daughter she’s kinda annoying I just want to be with him not his kids. I don’t know what to do ...
A. 2 July 2023: If he's a decent man, his child(ren) will always be No 1 priority. Would you really want to be with someone who side-lined his child(ren) every time a new bit of skirt came along?
I find it ironic that you expect more adult behaviour from a 1... (read in full...)
My fiance sent photos of herself in underwear to a guy because she wanted to feel hawt
Q. hi all I am in a difficult situation. I have been with my GF for 3 years, we have been engaged for 1. We have a great relationship and planning wedding for the next 6 months. I noticed she was acting strangely a few weeks ago, more attached to...
A. 2 July 2023: You know you have a gut instinct for good reason, don't you? It's there to tell you when something is wrong and to protect you - IF YOU LISTEN TO IT.
In your shoes I would call off the engagement and see if your girlfriend steps up or walks aw... (read in full...)
I don't want to act jealous
Q. My FWB let his ex wife watch his cats while he was away. He has 4. I wasn't available. She stayed at his home 3 weeks while he was away, and I'm fine with that. She left pieces of clothing and incidentals in his home. She wants to pick them up she ...
A. 2 July 2023: What you are "OK with" and what you are not is entirely up to you. However, it would appear from your post that you are actually after more than just the "FWB" relationship being offered. Something to think about perhaps?... (read in full...)
I don't want to act jealous
Q. My FWB let his ex wife watch his cats while he was away. He has 4. I wasn't available. She stayed at his home 3 weeks while he was away, and I'm fine with that. She left pieces of clothing and incidentals in his home. She wants to pick them up she ...
A. 2 July 2023: Test... (read in full...)
13yr Penis Length
Q. Is it normal for a 13yr male to have a penis length of 3 centimeters or should I contact my doctor?...
A. 29 June 2023: Yes, go and see your doctor. This is not a medical site.
Why does your profile say you are 22-25, yet you say you are 13?
... (read in full...)
13yr Penis Length
Q. Is it normal for a 13yr male to have a penis length of 3 centimeters or should I contact my doctor?...
A. 29 June 2023: Test... (read in full...)
I want a proper lavish wedding but family is making me feel stupid for wanting to have this.
Q. I’m engaged and due to get married within the next 2 years. I’ve already been married twice before and both weddings were cheap so now I actually want a proper no expense spared wedding but my family think I’m being stupid. My first marria...
A. 16 June 2023: Nobody can make you feel guilty without your permission. This is what YOU want. Your fiance is fine with it. It is YOUR money. It is YOUR life. Do what makes you happy.
I bet the ones who are offering their opinions will still come to the wedding ... (read in full...)
I want a proper lavish wedding but family is making me feel stupid for wanting to have this.
Q. I’m engaged and due to get married within the next 2 years. I’ve already been married twice before and both weddings were cheap so now I actually want a proper no expense spared wedding but my family think I’m being stupid. My first marria...
A. 16 June 2023: Test... (read in full...)
Can I take my cat to my sister in laws house whilst I’m away?
Q. I need some advice please. I’m not sure if anyone can help as it’s not a relationship question. I have a 13 year old cat which I adopted 4 years ago. When I went on holiday 2 years ago, for 2 weeks, I left her at a recommended Cattery. Unfort...
A. 11 June 2023: I'm puzzled by your post as you don't appear to have any other options, given that you have listed them all and said why they are not possible (or desirable to you).
Friends? No.
Neighbours? No.
Cat sitter? No.
Cattery? No.
Don't go away? ... (read in full...)
Can I take my cat to my sister in laws house whilst I’m away?
Q. I need some advice please. I’m not sure if anyone can help as it’s not a relationship question. I have a 13 year old cat which I adopted 4 years ago. When I went on holiday 2 years ago, for 2 weeks, I left her at a recommended Cattery. Unfort...
A. 11 June 2023: Test... (read in full...)
Friends with an former fantasist lover? Bad idea
Q. Dear Cupid, Around a year ago, I made a new friend. We spent a lot of time together but it was for me purely platonic, never sexual or romantic though I enjoyed our friendship. Over time I suspected he might harbor deeper feelings but always assum...
A. 11 June 2023: You want it all but being a mature adult means we have to recognise that sometimes we really cannot have it all. We then have to make a decision on what is most important and sacrifice something else. You want to stay friends with this man but you ... (read in full...)
Friends with an former fantasist lover? Bad idea
Q. Dear Cupid, Around a year ago, I made a new friend. We spent a lot of time together but it was for me purely platonic, never sexual or romantic though I enjoyed our friendship. Over time I suspected he might harbor deeper feelings but always assum...
A. 11 June 2023: Test... (read in full...)
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