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... Send *ikeEa1 a private message | | | *ikeEa1's profile:I'm in my fifties and I've had 2 marriages. The last one ended in July 2010. I like to help people and I'm interested in relationship problems. I like to learn too from other peoples experiences. I've had plenty of girlfiends and I always want to treat people nicely. relationships need mutual goals. You help me and I'll help you. At the moment I'm single and looking. update august 2012 - got a nice girlfriend and see how it goes. |
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If you have sex, how do you feel, if you cannot make her finish?
Q. If you're a guy, how does it make you feel if you cannot make her finish during sex? ...
A. 11 March 2011: the truth is a man likes to make his woman come. if they can't find a way of doing that then it's a bit of a downer for both of them unless you're a guy that doesn't care. as the others say it doesn't have to be penetrative sex it can be any way. I ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend goes to see his son and ex wife every few weeks and stays with them in the house for few weeks and it is killing me.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years. I love him to bits and I know he loves me too. he has been divorced for about 9 years and he has a son aged 10. His ex wife and son live abroad. he works month ON / Month off, when he is off, he ...
A. 9 March 2011: sorry sweetie but this is a no brainer, it's hard to get out but you must do so. it's clear that he's still attached to his ex. does she know about you? what a waste of a wonderful woman on someone who doesn't care.... (read in full...)
I've fallen for another man, but what do I tell my husband?
Q. I have been married for ten years now, i always thougt i had found my soulmate. now im not so sure i have been spending alot of time talking with another man whom i have great feelings for and i know he feels the same way, he wants me to leave and ...
A. 9 March 2011: relationships are really complicated as you have to consider all your feelings and the other persons feelings and try and work out what is right and wrong. once you bring a third party into the formulae you can't really gauge what's right or wrong. ... (read in full...)
Should I keep investing into my husband who wants his cake & wants to eat it to?
Q. My husband cheated on me. He asked me for an open relationship but I didn't want that. We split up, I moved out into my own apt. He still keeps me at arms length. We still have sex a few times a week. So, how stupid am I at this point? I kn...
A. 7 March 2011: this is a common way to wind down a relationship. it is no good for you and suits him. you should reduce your number of partners so you can think about them more as partners. although sex is good it is the companionship that brings people together ... (read in full...)
My husband makes me feel like I'm invisible...
Q. Oh where do i begin.... me any my husband have been married 8 yrs and together 10, but over the past year we have drifted apart, well he hasn't but i have... in 2005 he messed me around and left me twice for his ex wife, then my eldest son had a ...
A. 12 February 2011: There's one thing for sure, you need support. You should join a support group of people who have problems with children. there is at least an adhd support group. it may be an option to put that child on medication. it can help with their learning if ... (read in full...)
Confused about ex girlfriend
Q. My ex and I were dating for two years and I took her for granted and didnt treat her like I should have.A few months ago we had our first serious breakup.This lasted about a month and I found out that there was another guy involved and he had been ...
A. 8 February 2011: I wouldn't try to go back if I was you. This strategy might acheive your result because she might want you if you play hard to get. I know it's hard to move on especially in these circumstances but I think it's all you can do.... (read in full...)
My husband's child and the mother from a past relationship are back in our lives...the child stays with us every weekend, and my life is pretty much over!
Q. Two years ago I got married for the second time. My husband has a child from a previous relationship and all the time we have been married and for all the time the child has been born the mother and the child have lived in the US. The child who is ...
A. 5 February 2011: you poor woman I understand exactly how you feel. unfortunately circumstances change in relationships and you have to do what's best for you. don't spend the next 10 years sacrificing your weekends which are very important to those of us that work. ... (read in full...)
She said she didn't fancy me because I wasn't Asian?
Q. I started dating this woman a few weeks ago. I found her very attractive and we seemed to sizzle together. We went out 6 times and I thought we were like 2 peas in a pod. On the last occasion we had a very long intimate session. We had planned a ...
A. 4 February 2011: Thanks everyone for all your advice. The lady is Anglosaxon and says she doesn't like people with white skin, and because she likes my eyes she went out with me anyway, but the skin was a deal breaker. Your advice has been really good. I guess I'll ... (read in full...)
How do you know when you are ready to start dating again?
Q. I got out of an abusive relationship in July and my ex has continually contacted/harassed me ever since. I ended up having to get a restraining order. I have been technically "single" for 6 + months and on some level I want to start dating again. ...
A. 1 February 2011: you are ready to start dating again when you can offer the other person a package that can work. If you still carry baggage from the abusive relationship you should seek counselling. it would probably help. If you don't think you're stable enough to ... (read in full...)
Does the size of a girl's "pearl in her flower" matter to men?
Q. Ok guys, please be honest! Does the size of girl's "pearl in her flower" matter to you? I didn’t think mine was big till my boyfriend said, “wow your "pearl" gets so big when you’re turned on.” He makes jokes about it. Now I’m self conscious about ...
A. 31 January 2011: I had one woman whose pearl was so big it looked like a smallish penis. it was a bit of a worry. especially as she used to squirt. anyway unless it's getting to that sort of size there's nothing to worry about.... (read in full...)
3 years after husband walks out, I still grieve, when does it stop?
Q. Hi, I was with supposedly the "love of my life" for 32 years. In 2008, I found out he was having an affair. He left my son and I for 2 months, and then returned, stayed for 3 months, kept seeing the other person and then left again. I have not seen ...
A. 31 January 2011: to quote a famous author "the time and place are of no importance" what is important is that you are. you need to appcreciate that fact and work on making your reality meaningful to you in a positive way. we don't need other people or possesions to ... (read in full...)
does he think I'm a whore and he is just a really really good liar?
Q. ok,this is really confusing me-I have this new boyfriend-we've been seeing each other for a couple of months and he is saying that he loves me and he wants to have a serious relationship and he sounds really genuine and when he says what he likes ...
A. 27 January 2011: I don't know how many people beleive in labels. Surely if this guy and you are deveoping a good relationship then you should overlook it. Sometimes people say silly things in the heat of the moment. But you should be alert for further signs of ... (read in full...)
How can he NEVER have an orgasm?
Q. so my boyfriend and i have sex very often. the weird thing is i always orgasm and he can't. he can last for hours but yet he still doesn't orgasm. he loves to please me. don't get me wrong, i please him A LOT too. but sometimes its over an hour and ...
A. 26 January 2011: I have a similar problem and I thought it was unusual. Sometimes I can come quickly (within 20 minutes) and a lot of the time even though I really enjoy sex I can't come. It is frustrating but usually when I can't come the sex is most intense in ... (read in full...)
Are my gentials abnormal?
Q. This question has to do with the design of my genital area. I do not have that loose flappy skin that kind of looks like a thinner floppy second set of lips in between my vaginal lips. I've seen women in this x-rated magaizines with that. Is ...
A. 26 January 2011: I have seen a lot of vaginas honey and no amount of sex is going to do what you're hoping for. I'm sure your vagina is beautiful to all the men who've seen it and I am also sure that there are just as many women with your kind of labia as there are ... (read in full...)
How do you talk to men and build intimacy?
Q. So, my problem seems to be in how to talk to men. I don't know how to build intimacy. I always end up talking about politics or world issues, etc.... How do women talk to men, to make that connection? Any ideas/help would be appreciated....
A. 25 January 2011: being lighthearted and witty with a little bit of firty and suggestiveness does it for me every time.... (read in full...)
When a woman tells her man she wants a break...
Q. I've been dating this guy for about two years. Things were fantastic and then one by one, little things started bothering us about each other. He told me I put on a lot of weight, was messy and crazy. I couldn't stand his pot addiction, obsession ...
A. 24 January 2011: I sympathise with you as I understand that each person in a relationship has to make an effort. it's not really very hard unless you are unable to compromise. Sometimes you have to indulge the other person and sometimes you have to be indulged. ... (read in full...)
How can I tell my children I'm gay?
Q. How can I tell my children I'm gay? I have 3 children, teenage girls, and their mother died a couple of years ago. I think it's the right time to be true to myself (for the first time in 50+ years) and look for a relationship with another man. ...
A. 2 December 2010: be yourself. your children will appreciate it. You can't live your whole life supressing it. I guess you will have to expect some bad feelings but it might not necessarily happen.... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend keep looking at porn???
Q. I've caught my boyfriend for the second time looking at porn and masturbating over it. I hate the thought of my boyfriend looking at other naked girls on the internet and wanking off to them. Iv been seeing him for just over 2 years and its ...
A. 1 November 2010: most guys have got to have a bit of porn. but he should be discreet about it and it shouldn't take up too much of his time, say once a week maybe. he may need a bit of a heads up about it but don't make him totally go without.
... (read in full...)
Depression and its Effects on Relationships
Q. I am just wondering how many relationship that have broken up due to one partner's depression. Who broke up with whom, and when when the others depression was better did you end up getting back together? Can a relationship be fixed if one partner ...
A. 21 October 2010: It has had an effect on my relationship. My wife has depression and has had a few episodes. They were hard to get through especially for her. She also is a bit manic which leads her out of depression but can cost a lot of money. I'm currently ... (read in full...)
I'm devastated..ex no longer loves me!
Q. my ex told me she no longer loves 4 days ago, iam deverstated,iv not eaten or gone to work iv not been out of the house, and last night i was toil she has been seeing someone befor we split,all i ever done is love her i just can not stop crying, ...
A. 16 October 2010: I agree with whiteelephant. you have to live your life in the fast lane. you are what makes your life exciting.everybody else is windowdressing. that may sound a bit harsh but it doesn't mean you can't appreciate and be nice to other people but ... (read in full...)
My (ex?) wife's schemes
Q. My wife gets big ideas and they cost a lot of money. These ideas involve significant amounts of risk and also breaking the law sometimes. I'm just a regular guy and I object. As a result she told me we're getting divorced and she's paying me out. ...
A. 1 October 2010: Thanks guys it is good to hear some advice. People I know don't seem to give me advice. I guess I still love her. There are a lot of things that keep us together, but although I feel this behaviour is a dealbreaker, I would like to go back to the ... (read in full...)
I need a man's point of view on this one!
Q. From a male's perspective, do men as a general rule feel uncomfortable dating a woman who is separated and in the process of divorcing? If so will you explain why?...
A. 30 September 2010: having been in this situation myself I can say that it's not really a problem except for the fact that you do get caught up or involved in the argument. it's unavoidable, so it's not much fun from that point of view. But if you are developing a ... (read in full...)
Are older men better lovers?
Q. Is it true that older men make better lovers, due to experience?...
A. 24 September 2010: I am an older man and a better lover for it. When I was younger it was all about me. Now it's more about the woman. I don't expect everyone's the same though.... (read in full...)
Is he thinking of impregnating me?
Q. My boyfriend confuses me again and again...I am 20 and he is 36. We've been dating more than half a year. When it comes to sex, we use the pull-out method. From the first, he stated that he wanted no kids. I shrugged it off since I'm young and ...
A. 8 September 2010: He probably wouldn't mind impregnating you but would he hang in there for the long run and anyway you're a bit young. Do some other stuff first.... (read in full...)
Turned on a dime..
Q. I live on the east coast. I've met the girl of my dreams in San Francisco about 36 months ago and she, in turn, met who she called the "guy she was going to grow old with." Two issues: she's still in a divorce and nasty custody battle with her ex. ...
A. 8 September 2010: It doesn't look good. She is on medication and you're going to have to worry about behavioural issues for the rest of your life with her. i understand that it's nice when it's nice but you're going to end upo a doormat if you stick with this.... (read in full...)
My wife has lost interest in sex!
Q. my wife aged 36 has suddenly lost interest in sex . she just wants to masturbate once in a week or so while i want sex twice a day and that to a wild one and she says that the kids will come to know . what do i do ? I hate jacking off?...
A. 20 August 2010: I think you need to talk to your wife a lot until you get some kind of common ground on this matter. If I had a wife she would not get the chance to masturbate, ever ... (read in full...)
I have difficulty ejaculating while having sex!
Q. Ok I'm a bit embarrassed about this but I need help!!!! I cannot seem to ejaculate while having sex... I can go for hours and nothing at all... This has happened with the last few girls iv slept with... But last night while I was having sex with ...
A. 20 August 2010: This one's easy. You masturbate too much and need to leave it alone for a while so the girl can be more interesting than your hand... (read in full...)
Wide hips: good or bad?
Q. I have an average body type, I'm 5'6, I'm athletic and try to keep in shape and I'm content with my body ..... Recently while getting dressed, my friend (a male) said to me that my "hips are wide" ... should I take that as a compliment or as insul...
A. 19 August 2010: all men fantasize about girls with wide hips. consider yourself blessed... (read in full...)
Is it normal to be so upset when he is only going away for a few days on a business trip?
Q. I want to know if I am going crazy or what??? My bf and I have been dating for a year now and we are so in love with each other we are always together, well 99% of the time. I have never been so happy with anyone in my life I left during last spring ...
A. 17 August 2010: That's the way a lot of us feel on the inside, but you have to look at it as an opportunity to develop your sense of self. You are yourself and although the relationship gives you lots of positive feelings it is nice to explore the you that is you ... (read in full...)
Any thoughts on her behaviour with other guys?
Q. I'm with this girl and I am generally happy with her. She's had a bit of a past, more so than me, meaning she had a period when she was casually dating a string of guys but nothing serious. I'm fine with that, too. Now, she seems really into me a...
A. 17 August 2010: It sounds like she's not really into you. Maybe you should try and arrange a bit of one on one time and see how you two relate. If she seems distracted or if you don't seem to be hitting it off as couple maybe you both should try spending time with ... (read in full...)
Because he did this, do you think he really loves me??
Q. after my x bf acuse me of lieying to him for not being a virgin i found myself a good man he lier for me by telling my parent that he his the one that took my verginity i was so chock when he said that so do u gys think he really loves me....
A. 29 July 2010: no... (read in full...)
I told my 33 year old teacher that I love him and he doesn't believe me!
Q. Im just 18.im in love with my teacher.hes 33 i dont care about the age gap.hes married and devoced. His wife has left him because he cant make kids.i told him dat i love him.I think that he cant belive it.How can i tell him that im dead sirious on ...
A. 24 July 2010: I used to be a teacher and about 5% of the girls fell in love with me. I would never let them become intimate in any way and I'm sure your teacher would be the same. If he did it would be very unprofessional. Because the teacher needs to command ... (read in full...)
Unable to finish
Q. my girlfriend and i have been having sex for some time now, we have done it 15+ times now and i haven't came once by our estimations i could go for over 3 hours. i have no trouble becoming aroused and her performance not a problem either. i have no ...
A. 24 July 2010: don't worry it's within the realms of normal. I get a bit like this sometimes. It's a matter of mind over matter. You can make yourself come and it's time to hand the job over to someone else. Get yourself into the frame of mind and let it happen. ... (read in full...)
My husband is lying about his porn emails!
Q. I have found items on my husbands email that are porn. I asked him about this and he sweetly told me I was wrong that he ordered some inhancment drug and started getting these after that. But I found an email for an account before. I am so upset. I ...
A. 24 July 2010: leave him alone. it's got nothing to do with you. and I'm not being harsh. I may be wrong but he can love you and releive himself too. what is going too far is when he makes these activities personal with someone else... (read in full...)
Relationship advice over "confused" ex girlfriend
Q. Hello! I need some serious advice. My ex-gf and I dated for about 4 years. In December of this past year she broke up with me because she needed some "space." We ended up getting back together after about a month. Things afterwards were ...
A. 24 July 2010: missdimples3 is pretty right except for one thing. a girl doesn't often go with the one she picks up and puts down and picks up again. you're not "the one"... (read in full...)
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