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I have difficulty ejaculating while having sex!

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 August 2010) 8 Answers - (Newest, 20 August 2010)
A male United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Ok I'm a bit embarrassed about this but I need help!!!! I cannot seem to ejaculate while having sex... I can go for hours and nothing at all... This has happened with the last few girls iv slept with... But last night while I was having sex with this new girl I hav been talking too when she had enough and I was ready to finish... It took forever and still nothing... So I stopped because I didn't want to hurt her... She was really upset afterwords and began to act awkward toward me... In addition some times I feel like I came and it would appear that I'm just shooting "blanks" because nothing comes out... I would like to mention that this does not happen all the time but happens quite frequently.... The last 4 girls iv slept with and had this problem were quick to leave... Please help so I can have a normal sex life!!!!

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A male reader, MikeEa1 Australia +, writes (20 August 2010):

MikeEa1 agony auntThis one's easy. You masturbate too much and need to leave it alone for a while so the girl can be more interesting than your hand

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A female reader, Gabrielle Stoker United States +, writes (20 August 2010):

Gabrielle Stoker agony auntI don't think attractiveness of the girl is that important a factors since he says he feels like he's finished, but there is no cum.

It would be interesting to know whether you do ejaculate with masturbation though.

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A male reader, wisernow United States +, writes (20 August 2010):

For most young men premature ejaculation is a problem. Perhaps your failure to ejaculate with every girl is simply a case of bedding a girl that you are not really attracted to..... just using her body ..... If you met the most interesting and beautiful girl in the world would there be a problem ejaculating?

So perhaps the degree of your interest in the girl dictates what will happen once she permits you to enter her?

From the girl's standpoint she may think the problem is herself. Girls love to make a guy cum... it defines their sex appeal and beauty. So not ejaculating makes them wonder.."is there something wrong with me?"

Do you always ejaculate when you masturbate? Do you have any problem doing so as a girl performs oral sex?

Try dating girls that REALLY interest you....

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2010):

I have had the same problem for as long as I've been having sex (8 years). Even with a girlfriend I had for several years and was very comfortable with.

The only difference is, I've never felt like I had an orgasm without an ejaculation. That is a reason to see a doctor. If it weren't for that symptom, I would say your problem is completely psychological (as mine is).

A psychiatrist/therapist might be in order, after you address any possible physical issues. Might want to look for someone who specializes in men's sexual issues, because it's pretty unusual. The medical term for it is "anorgasmia."

To compound my problem, I haven't had a long-term girlfriend in a long time. If I did, I could put a theoretical solution into practice. As it is, I can only even gather any data every so often.

One thing to find out is if your problem is at least partially due to being too physically accustomed to one type of stimulation (for example, aggressive stimulation with your hand). I realized this the first time I tried masturbating with my left hand. It took forever to reach orgasm. You could try a fleshlight (google it). I've used it to try to get used to having an orgasm with somewhat lesser stimulation than my hand (no vagina is as tight as my fist, and neither is the fleshlight).

I have no idea where the problem comes from. I don't know if it will ever go away.

If you want to talk more, you can post a followup with a registered name asking for me. I'll contact you.

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A female reader, Gabrielle Stoker United States +, writes (20 August 2010):

Gabrielle Stoker agony auntPlease seek medical help. An andrologist would be able to guide you.

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A male reader, Western3589 United States +, writes (20 August 2010):

Western3589 agony auntDoctors.

If not that, google.

Could have something to do with your diet. Doctor would know

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A female reader, itzy.21 United States +, writes (20 August 2010):

itzy.21 agony auntgo to your doctor.

you can trust him with your sexual life.

do it for your own good.


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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2010):

damn, that must really suck. ;/

maybe u should go to a doctor and tell him whats going on.

he should tell ou whats going on with your body.

you may be like "hell no i dint wnna tell mya doctor!"..

butt go for it your old enough to talk to your doctor

on your own. goodluck,

and hope your sex life gets better!


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