New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login239184 questions, 1056645 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

*oleymoley

Australia  (Female   XML/RSS

Like what she writes?
... Add *oleymoley to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *oleymoley a private message

*oleymoley's Ratings

Rating: 8.33

Excellent81%
Average8%
Poor12%
12Next > [2 pages, 57 answers]

HE wants to play games with his ex, but I am not sure about it.

Q.   Hi, I started an LDR a week ago, we talk every day, everything is good. But he just got out of a 3months relationship ( his ex gf ended it..) Now, she's texting him, and he wants to go with it. wtich means he just wants to make fun of her and make...

A.   13 January 2018: His attitude belongs in the school yard not in a relationship. He has shown his mean streak-red flag!... (read in full...)

Am I right to feel offended by my boss's improper comment?

Q.   Hi.I teach at a higher education institution, where I had an incident with my boss today. While I was having coffee with four colleagues, he told us to not use electric heaters because the central heating system - which has never really worked – was ...

A.   11 January 2018: Nipped it in the bud. next time he may think twice about doing it to you or anyone else for that matter. ... (read in full...)

His email to his brother hurts more than his affair

Q.   My partner and I have been together for 3 years in January, he cheated on me with someone I knew in October. In our bed When I was away for 2 days. When I came back he acted like nothing had happened but I knew in my heart and then my friends told ...

A.   10 January 2018: Sweetie, this ain't love and your right, the affair is one thing but wanting to hurt you so deeply by him wishing you catching him in the act is the lowest of the low. Ive been cheated on, a few times, and its never been the sex that cuts so deep, I ... (read in full...)

New girfriend wants marriage .... I don't!

Q.   Simple situation, I've recently walked out on a 18 year marriage, we've lived apart or part-time for the last 2 years. We have no children, fury babies only. She has the lions share of income and I was not satisfied in our relationship, we simply ...

A.   6 January 2018: With brute honesty. You sir, need time to BREATHE and recover from a divorce and you know what THATS OK. If your new gf cant understand that then I think single life is far more appealing that being pushed into something you don't want. To me that ... (read in full...)

Should I confess to my drunken night?

Q.   I went out last night and got really drunk. A guy grabbed me and started kissing me and feeling me up and without thinking I started kissing him back. Then he said he would help to get me home safely but he got out of the taxi too and we ended up ...

A.   6 January 2018: If you are feeling guilty now, then chances are you will tomorrow and the next and the next after that and so on. IT WILL EAT YOU UP ALIVE and chances are it will come out one way or the other. Maybe you will fess up, maybe he will rock up, maybe ... (read in full...)

Do I contact him over this rude breakup?

Q.   I got in from work to find a email off my boyfriend saying because I'm not an animal person (he has a cat) it won't work out. I have a cat myself. He has blocked me off everything and I don’t know why so I can’t ask him. I knew he was having a few ...

A.   5 January 2018: An email!!!!!! because of a cat!!!!!! be thankful he broke it off- bloody coward... (read in full...)

I feel I shouldn't move in til he sorts his children's visitation issue.

Q.   I have been dating my bf for 2 years now. we live separately for the moment he has his home and I have mine. He has asked me to move in his home but, I have declined at the moment for this story I will tell. he has 3 children 9,10 and 18. I have ...

A.   5 January 2018: I still stand by my first post. Let him and his lawyer sort through it as best they can. You will be made a target and scapegoat pawn in a messy situation. Living together you simply cant get away from it and it can be taxing, VERY taxing on a ... (read in full...)

Why didn't my ex have the courtesy to tell me he was getting married and having a child?

Q.   Hi Everyone, I could use some advice. I'm having a difficult time coping with my ex boyfriend getting married and having a daughter. He was married in August and continue to see me casually until one day I found out he was married with a d...

A.   2 January 2018: What a jackass lowlife scumbag! that is if you had no idea he even had a fiancee, otherwise well.... either way be pleased hes not your problem but hers. If he comes back for a bit more on the side, more than likely he'd be sniffing around when she ... (read in full...)

He used me then broke up with me. Should I ask him to give back the gifts I gave him?

Q.   Now my ex as of a few weeks before Christmas, I gave him,Christmas gifts, then the next day , it was over, haven't heard from him since, he didn't give me any gifts, my friends told me he should of given them back, cause he knew he was dumping me, ...

A.   2 January 2018: And if he says no? Just more annoyance and upset for you. ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend planned a week long New Year's party at his parents' holiday home despite knowing that I wouldn't be able to make it because of my upcoming exams

Q.   My boyfriend [24M] of 6 years decided to throw a week long New Years party with all our mutual friends (roughly about 20 people) at his parents holiday home, which is couple of hours drive away, while I [23F] stay back and study for finals for grad ...

A.   31 December 2017: Personally, if I had to study for my exams I'd be grateful everyone just buggered off so I could do it in peace with any interruptions. Also I would want for my partner to enjoy having some fun with friends, not be bored silly just because I was ... (read in full...)

I told my wife the truth and she is furious!

Q.   I have been married to my wife for about 11 years now and have 2 kids, a girl aged 8 and a boy aged 4. Recently I was on a night out with friends and were at this bar where we met a few girls and ended up going to their apartment which was nearby. ...

A.   29 December 2017: While you were getting it on???? Dude, thats cheating come on. You FUCKED UP BIG TIME and if it wasn't for her checking your phone, fuck up number two. How do you mend it, I guess you do whatever it is that you would expect of her if she got it on ... (read in full...)

Why can’t they leave me alone and enjoy my visit?

Q.   Am visiting family interstate for 2 days,staying overnight then leaving. Staying with my parents and will visit my younger sister and her family also, as they live in the same town. I have to stay with parents as sister has 2 kids (17...

A.   29 December 2017: People only get away with what you let them get away with. No body wants to listen to that crap, hardly welcoming is it! Anything negative Id respond with positive: Im tired mum, because Im having fun living my life You can never have enough w... (read in full...)

Cannot accept my background and heritage

Q.   I can’t identify with my European parents and nationality. I have been living in the States for the last three decades but along my life I have encountered people from my nationality. I don’t mean to sound judgemental here but everyone from where I ...

A.   27 December 2017: Why identify as anything. Just be you and live life anyway you please. ... (read in full...)

Married man taking me for a ride and dumping without closure

Q.   I am 34 single been in a few bad relations and have always been dumped. After 4 years I recently met this man online and he started off with lies. It turned out he was married with a Pico and he says it's his conscience which made him speak the ...

A.   26 December 2017: What he 'needs' is a big fat 'Fuck off'. Don't go down that path with a married man. In person, on line it makes no difference it is a recipe for disaster, that much you can count on. Cheaters, men and woman, are master manipulators to get all it is ... (read in full...)

I feel I shouldn't move in til he sorts his children's visitation issue.

Q.   I have been dating my bf for 2 years now. we live separately for the moment he has his home and I have mine. He has asked me to move in his home but, I have declined at the moment for this story I will tell. he has 3 children 9,10 and 18. I have ...

A.   22 December 2017: I wouldn't if it were me. It all sounds a bit too messy atm. Stress and unfinished ex business is not a good start to living happy under the same roof. Relationships can work just as well from not living together.... (read in full...)

What's the best way for me to appraoch this girl?

Q.   Hi I'm having a problem with getting any sort of connection with a girl I have become friends with. We met at college and have been in group tasks etc and we got on really well I have real feelings towards her but have tried to talk to her via ...

A.   22 December 2017: Keep it cool. A simple and casual invite to coffee , if she accepts see where it goes. Personally I think the "asking out for coffee ritual" is the baseline for getting some sort of indication of how things are. What ever your do mate, I wouldn't be ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is being brutally honest and I can't cope with it.

Q.   Been dating for a year and it's the BEST relationship I've ever been in. However, he's starting to be brutally honest and I'm not liking it. I've told him how I felt, even cried and I try to avoid certain topics just because where it can lead to. He ...

A.   13 December 2017: Honesty is one thing but to be somewhat positive there is also tact. Can you give some examples?... (read in full...)

Troubled and confused by girlfriend and her kitten

Q.   Dear all This problem is a bit strange and you may think I am weird, however this is just the way I am. I am in a long distance relationship with a girl I love very much. We have plans to be together soon. Recently she out of the blue to...

A.   8 December 2017: Why dont you take the cat ? ... (read in full...)

Was it inappropriate for my wife to wear the revealing dress just to get back at me?

Q.   A short time ago me and my wife had an argument just before we were going out to meet friends for some dinner and drinks. She wasn't quite ready, so she said she would meet up with us later. So I went and met with our friends. She came in about a ...

A.   20 November 2017: be glad that hot little lady is your wife-YOURS... (read in full...)

Would this relationship be wrong?

Q.   I've already asked this question but I didn't outback detail in to it so I'm gonna try again! Is it wrong for me to be falling in love with my soon to be step uncle ? I've recently turned 18 and he's recently turned 21. My uncle is marrying ...

A.   19 November 2017: Go for it. Hope it works out for both of you. There is nothing wrong or sordid about this. Apart from not being blood related there is enough degree of separation to tell any one interested in voicing their opinion to mind it! ... (read in full...)

How can a wife cheat for 3 years and act like everything is ok?

Q.   After I found out that my wife was having a three year affair with another man, I gave her an ultimatum and she ended it....she eventually told me that she made a big mistake, and didnt know what she was thinking the past three years...I found out ...

A.   11 November 2017: When you are as cunning as her i suppose it would be easy and over three years i guess even easier because it became the norm. I agree with Honeypie, 3 years (1095 days) is NOT a mistake by a long shot, it was a deliberate and well executed ... (read in full...)

Does he like me? He has a girlfriend but what's with his behaviour towards me?

Q.   There's a guy who I work with, we work at a recreational centre for youths. I've noticed he's been acting different around me when we work together. I'll list a few examples: whenever we talk, he'll make eye contact and then he looks at my lips, he...

A.   7 November 2017: Flirty little chap, I have to agree. Be careful...... (read in full...)

Why would he say "I love you" if he has no intention of changing his life for you?

Q.   If a married man you've been involved in a long term relationship with tells you he loves you, could he really mean it, even if he will never leave his wife to be with you? It's a terrible predicament to be in when you realize you now love this ma...

A.   29 October 2017: saying I love you is cheaper than paying for it- ... (read in full...)

How do I tell my online guy friend that I won't be able to keep talking to him every night when I move in with my boyfriend?

Q.   So to give you a little bit of context - I've been talking with this guy over the phone for a little over a year (we met online) - Let's call him James. He lives in the US and I am in Canada. We used to talk dirty to each other over the phone during ...

A.   28 October 2017: Its all good and well that James knows about Anthony, the problem is Anthony doesn't know about James. being he is your boyfriend your need to decide where your loyalties lie and how you would feel if the shoe was on the other foot. You have a few ... (read in full...)

Boyfriend says his phone was hacked. I don't believe him.

Q.   I recently found pictures of my significant other in his phone along with seeing him on website called backpage. I viewed his history and found him looking up girls in different areas. He denied taking those pictures in my bed from not even less ...

A.   28 October 2017: "In your bedroom" " hacked" -sheesh! Of course you don't believe him, who would. Thats as believable as "I slipped and my dick accidentally went into her vagina"- Move on girlfriend... (read in full...)

How do I explain to my fiance that I want to go out dressed up as a female without hurting her feelings?

Q.   I'm engaged to a wonderful girl. I've always considered myself a female in my heart. I have been crossdressing secretly in the past but I can't anymore. I really want to go out and be feminine once in a while. I explained my fiancee my situation. I ...

A.   28 October 2017: If I understand your post correct, her conditions are NOT to let her see you dressed as a woman. I think you are on a winner with this woman mate. She seems to have accepted this is a part of who you are and want to express, that takes great love. ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend took small amounts of money from my purse! What should I do?

Q.   I was dating a guy for 3 months, who I love, and knew was broke/unemployed. 2 weeks ago, $15.00 was missing from my wallet. I thought I miscounted, so the next time he came over I took a pic of my wallet, so I knew for sure. $20.00 went miss...

A.   26 October 2017: Bullet dodged if in fact that is without a doubt correct. No matter how poor or unemployed you are. Stealing is stealing and him doing it right under your nose is him taking you for an absolute idiot. Don't prove him right trying to get back with ... (read in full...)

He's changed how the trip expenses will be split!

Q.   So, I'm in a relatively new relationship.....we met in June but things have gotten more serious in the past 2 months where we now are exclusive......he's been talking about an event he wants to attend in the big apple in december and so we've been ...

A.   24 October 2017: Well that doesn't sound very fair, to go back on his word. Be frank and up front by saying while you don't mind paying your way, that's not how he pitched it to you in the first place. I think it is rude to assume that someone is OK with financial ... (read in full...)

My guy friend denies being in a relationship and lied about becoming a father

Q.   Hi everyone, so this situation is going to sound kind of crazy. There's this guy who I've been friends with for about 2 years. At this point, we spend a lot of time together, keep in contact on a daily basis, and share a lot of personal information ...

A.   18 October 2017: Sounds like he enjoys the thrill of female attention. Not that he is obliged in anyway to divulge his personal status , given you are just friends it does seem something, Id consider, to be the norm in conversation. Perhaps he was trying to get a ... (read in full...)

Does this age gap between us matter?

Q.   I am 27years old and the love of my life d one I wanted to marry is 37years old by age.we both love each other so dearly and he is a man every woman would wanted as a husband because he has d attribute he is loving,caring,calm,hard work and lastly ...

A.   12 October 2017: No, if you love him like you do why should it and others opinions bother you. Love, laugh and live ... (read in full...)

Am I being too materialstic and self sabotaging?

Q.   Am I being unrealistic? I am 50 and dating a man for close to three months who claims he is retired, I came to find out he was laid off and doesn't want to go back to work. I find myself paying more often when we go out, it is a huge turn-off. I ...

A.   10 October 2017: Nope, It would pis me off too. You only need to put your hands in your pocket to get a tissue.... (read in full...)

I'm pressured to get married how can I cope?

Q.   Is it too late to have kids in your 40"s . I am 31 and single and not dating - I have chased men for the last decade and have only LAnded on abusive men. I don't know why family puts pressure on me to get married and do things by the book but they ...

A.   9 October 2017: You do what is right for you, and thats OK! Having bad relationships take their toll so I think it is so very important to have the most important relationships now you can and that is with yourself. Both OK and WISE.Assholes can smell vulnerability ... (read in full...)

He found the girl he dumped me for was too costly and wants me to take him back.

Q.   So, this guy and I were dating for almost two years and he proposed to me in May. A few weeks later he tells me hes going on vacation with his old crush/ friend since high school there both 28. But they have been friends forever. So, he breaks off ...

A.   9 October 2017: WOW WEE WOW WOW! He really does think he is it and a bit doesn't he. What a cheeky bastard to think he should so much as consider grovelling back to you. AND what an absolute insult to think you would or should consider it. You're smart to tell him ... (read in full...)

He was looking at provocative image!

Q.   Hi I'm looking for some advice I've never had to do this before. My question is how am I supposed to feel about my partner of 15 years was working on his laptop and stepped outside for a smoke I was unpacking shopping and on his screen was a picture ...

A.   7 October 2017: Get hot buff dude for you screen saver. There really is no winning these kinds of arguments. Chances are when you think it's all done and dusted its only because they are more careful. I think if you are a little flexible things may not get too out ... (read in full...)

Other people have forgiven him, so why cant our children?

Q.   One year ago my husband of 23 years was arrested, he had been looking at underage pornography. 45 counts of category a amongst other. Myself and our family were totally shocked as he had always been a very good person who helped all the family and ...

A.   7 October 2017: "I would lay my life down he would never have touched a child" I'm not sure why you cant make the connection to the sheer gravity of his actions. It makes very little difference to the abused children he watched for his sexual gratification.Watching ... (read in full...)

He's bragged about cheating on me behind my back but denies it when I confront him!

Q.   Have been told by strangers, friends and family that my boyfriend of twenty years has bragged about cheating on me every chance he gets when he's working out of town. He actually butt dialed me during one of his bragging sessions to a friend and I ...

A.   2 October 2017: Unless there is some conspiracy against this man of yours -sure give him the benefit of the doubt. But really, come on....can so many people have it so wrong, including his butt? Your making a bigger fool of yourself than he, don't do it to ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend's mother came over and rearranged our bedroom, I can't find anything!

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 years now and we live together. He is 22 and I’m 20. Let me start off by saying, I think family is super important and I would never want to come between my boyfriend and his family. But it bothers ...

A.   28 September 2017: Nooooooo way- NOT COOL! Totally disrespectful and invasion of privacy. As for that bf of yours- same same, maybe if HE cleaned up a bit then maybe his mum would not feel the need to still be wiping his nose for him-Sheesh! Next time why not leave a ... (read in full...)

Fiances mother is refusing to come to our wedding unless we change our plans

Q.   firstly, thank you for taking the time to read my post. I'm having problems with my fiancées mother. Backstory: me and him met in school, at15, we've been together ever since. We got engaged may 2016 in Fiji we had originally planned a two wee...

A.   28 September 2017: Oh boy. Truly I think your soon to be MIL is being selfish and unreasonable. Stick to your plans, they sound wonderful and intimately right on track for what, IMHO, a wedding is-sharing it with those who are important, not every Tom Dick and Harry ... (read in full...)

Is this something I can fix by correcting a few actions in our relationship? Do I give her space and trust that she will end up with me? What do I do?

Q.   My gf of 1.5 years recently told me that she likes a guy from work as as more than friends but is unsure about what to do. She said she loves me and she doesn't love him because it is too early to tell. She said she recognizes that it is unfair to ...

A.   21 September 2017: Give her space and lots of it. So much space that you have room for someone else. I mean really, there is honesty in a relationship, that I totally respect and then there is ...HONESTLY!!! as in are you for real honey? She is cheating, just not ... (read in full...)

I moved to be nearer to her, now she has broken up with me.

Q.   I'm fifty years old and moved over a year ago to be near my girlfriend she is 48 and I thought she was the love of my life. Suddenly she started saying she was busy all of the time and tired So I havnt seen her in two weeks. Tonight she broke up ...

A.   11 September 2017: Real sorry this has happened to you, hardly fair and must hurt. Who knows why people choose to do what they do and act so poorly. Relations cool down, people turn off but that is no excuse for txt'ing someone a break up- thats just cowardly and ... (read in full...)

*oleymoley's friends

These are mutual friends, so *oleymoley has added them and they have added *oleymoley!

Abella agony auntAbella

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0937501000007614!