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... Send *annieseds a private message | | | *annieseds's profile:I'm a fun-lovin 24 year old chick from the bottom of the world - New Zealand.
I recently celebrated 5 beautiful years with my boy, and of course nothing is smooth sailing but we have come out on top and are looking sooo forward to waking up for morning cuddles together for the rest of our days.
If anyone wants advice on how we survived 2 years long-distance across 16,000 miles, please message me and I'll give you any advice I can!
"Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it without knowing what is going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity." |
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My BF promised he would cease all contact with his ex, now he's meeting her for a coffee! Am I overreacting?
Q. OK, this is definitely the last time that I am going to post a question about this, but it's driven me to distraction for the last time... My boyfriend and me have been together for over a year now. During the course of this time, there has ...
A. 26 July 2006: Hey there babe,
A promise is a promise and he has broken that. He is abusing your trust. He knows how you feel about this and he is still contacting her! Why does he need to see her behind your back and now for a coffee if nothing has happened... (read in full...)
I didn't want to cheat, but it was a drunkin' kiss.....now I don't know what to do!
Q. Recently I went on an all girls holiday for 4 nights away and before I went my boyfriend said that he had no reason to worry that I would cheat on him because he trusted me completely and knew I wouldnt cheat, anyway while we were away all of my ...
A. 26 July 2006: Hey there,
I usually don't condone cheating, hell no actually! BUT. You sound very remorseful and you know what a terrible mistake you made - so yes, is really was that bad what you did - you cheated on the man you love but I don't think yo... (read in full...)
Is it normal that he gets turned on my porn, even when he's got me?
Q. Please help me. Is it normal for your boyfriend to be turned on by a porn video or some other girl even when he has a girlfriend? Please help me xxx...
A. 20 July 2006: Hey there,
It depends on the man! My man doesn't look at it at all and sometimes I even pull out an XXX vid to try something different but he just doesn't like it! So there are men out there who don't look at it but I guess it's up to you to d... (read in full...)
My best friend moved without saying goodbye!
Q. The worst possible thing that could've happend to me, did. My best friend Tasha left me and moved to Texas. About 3 nights before she left, I went over to her house and she told me that she was going to Texas to stay. As soon as she said that I ...
A. 13 July 2006: Her parents won't tell you? That is pretty horrible of them really, considering you have been friends with their daughter for 8 years! I think you need to say to them how sorry you are things were left the way they were and you really want to make ... (read in full...)
My best friend moved without saying goodbye!
Q. The worst possible thing that could've happend to me, did. My best friend Tasha left me and moved to Texas. About 3 nights before she left, I went over to her house and she told me that she was going to Texas to stay. As soon as she said that I ...
A. 13 July 2006: Hey there petal,
You made a very bad move by leaving as soon as she told you she was moving. Can you imagine how hard that would have been for her to tell you, her best friend of 8 years, that she had to leave? She would have been so nervous ... (read in full...)
Dieting, but no weight lost. Growing hair on my stomach. Anyone have ideas for me?
Q. I have a problem I am 16 yrs old and I have been dieting for nearly 3 months now, but I haven't lost any weight whatsoever. Does anyone know if there are pills I can take or anything like that to help me lose my weight? And my other concern i...
A. 11 July 2006: Hey there,
What kind of dieting are you doing? Are you following a healthy eating plan and not skipping meals? Are you doing an hour of exercise every day? If you are serious about losing weight, it is a slow and sometimes very annoying... (read in full...)
I read on a website that males don't like dry-humping! But we do it all the time!
Q. I was reading some information on another website, i forget the name of it, and there was this article on it about dry sex aka dry humping. Anyway, it was written by a male and it addressed this sexual act from the male perspective and he went on to ...
A. 11 July 2006: Hey girl,
Welcome to the age of the internet! People can post anything and everything from cold, hard facts backed up by research to unsupported opinions. That, my friend, is what you have read and taken to heart. One mere males OPINION ... (read in full...)
Am pregnant again after having an abortion not long ago... I feel so alone... please help
Q. Hi I need help. I have fallen pregnant again after I have just had an abortion not long ago. I dont want to get an abortion but my boyfriend does and i have no one to talk to. I feel so alone. I have tried to convince him that everything will be ok ...
A. 11 July 2006: Hey there petal,
How close are you to your mother? Since she has gone through the same experience when she was your age, then she is the perfect person to talk to and to support you through whatever decision you make. I know how hard it can be t... (read in full...)
Could our different sex drives cause him to stray?
Q. I don't know what to do. I have a really low sex drive, whereas my partner has a high one. Our sex life is non existent. We have a 10 month old baby and I have fears of my partner leading astray because of it. Please help?...
A. 11 July 2006: Hey there,
I'm answering this coming from the opposite side to you. I am the one with the high sex drive and my BF has a pretty low one. I used to get bloody annoyed when he kept saying no but over time I have learnt to accept that we are diff... (read in full...)
My BF is acting like a bachelor even though we have 2 kids! Help!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years and I think it is over. We're both 22 and we have 2 kids but he has refused to change his dreams and goals that he has when he was a single man. He hates doing family things with the kids as HE finds it bor...
A. 10 July 2006: Hey girl,
It sounds to me like this man needs an incredibly big wake-up call! He is very obviously taking you for granted in every way possible and I offer you my strength & love in order for you to move on and find yourself a better life. ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to get pregnant from dry humping through layers of clothes?
Q. Well my bf and i were dry humping tonight and he got really into it and I think he "went". I was reading another post about this and one of the answers said that its very risky so I'm worried. Here is the situation though. He had on bball shorts a...
A. 10 July 2006: Hey girl,
You don't need to worry yourself about this AT ALL! This is no way that his little spermies could have gotten through all that!
Rest easy my friend :o) xxx... (read in full...)
I really like my teacher - how likely is it that we could get involved?
Q. I'm sure this question has been posted millions of times... but I need to ask so... here I go: I started liking a teacher about January (when he was no longer my teacher). I would go in his room with friends and flirt with him everyday and lau...
A. 10 July 2006: Hey there petal,
They are not stupid questions at all, so promise me that you won't think you're stupid for asking them... you are confused, and rightly so because you have an infatuation with a man who is wrong in so many ways, but the heart kn... (read in full...)
My BF is acting like a bachelor even though we have 2 kids! Help!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years and I think it is over. We're both 22 and we have 2 kids but he has refused to change his dreams and goals that he has when he was a single man. He hates doing family things with the kids as HE finds it bor...
A. 10 July 2006: Hey there,
I am so happy that you are not married to this man! He obviously only really truely cares about himself - has he always been like this? What is he like with you - does he do special things for you, make you feel like the most beautifu... (read in full...)
What could my GF be up to while she is on holiday?!
Q. Hi, My girlfriend is on holiday in Magaluf with her best 'girl' friend and I can't stop thinking about what she might be up to. We have been together about 3 months and the holiday was booked about 6 months ago. I bit my tongue about her holida...
A. 10 July 2006: Hi there,
You are being very stereotypical here about the reasons men go on holidays and they feel sad if they don't 'pull'. Are you saying that you think all men are pigs and cheat on their girlfriends/wives when they're away? Are you saying y... (read in full...)
The girl's not interested in a boyfriend right now, so why can't I get over her?
Q. There's a girl at school (well the school I used to go to but now I've left and I'm on my gap year) and I think she's perfect for me. She's smart, she's pretty and she has a good sense of humour. Yet she always seemed embarrassed every time I spoke ...
A. 6 July 2006: If you can't handle people's opinions then why did you even bother coming here in the first place! This girl took time out of HER LIFE to try and give you advice as best she could and you call it shit. Go on GET OUT OF HERE! We don't want people ... (read in full...)
He ridicules me until I cry!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. and we live together Our current issue involves miscommunication. He gets really defensive and ridicules the things that I say, as if I am not getting my point across (as many times as I may ...
A. 6 July 2006: Hey there petal,
Here are some tips I gave to another woman with communication problems with her partner.....take a look @ see if they help @ all!
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-just-want-to-be-able-to-discuss.html... (read in full...)
How do I make up for a drunken nightmare?
Q. i got very drunk one night and ended up trying to kiss my boyfriends friend. however i don't remember this becuase i was drunk. i love my boyfriend and desperately want to get back with him. please give me advice on how....
A. 4 July 2006: Hey there petal,
I disagree with 'happylife's comment that you blew it, but hey, everyone is entitled to their opinion!
I did an even more disgusting thing than you when I was drunk and beat my BF of 5 years to a pulp - he was covered in bruis... (read in full...)
I feel fed up and dont know how to change it! Please help so I dont lose my relationship!
Q. Hi, Im nomally the life and soul of the party, always happy, never let anything get me down, but just lately ive been feeling really fed up, and miserable and I dont know why. I have a fabulous boyfriend and we are very much in love, we do a...
A. 28 June 2006: Hey girl,
You just described my EXACT situation from about 6 months ago - that really just freaked me out actually!
My BF was actually the one that woke me up to the fact that I had changed from my usual, happy, full-of-life, no boundaries gi... (read in full...)
Been together 5 years and he sends dirty text messages to another girl...
Q. Im really stuck. Ive been with my boyfriend for 5 years and now and we've been through a lot (including a time when we split for a month). Last week I found out he had been sending dirty text messgaes to another girl. It really upset me and I ...
A. 28 June 2006: Hey there petal.
NOT COOL, NOT COOL AT ALL!
I've been with my man for 5 years and if I ever found out he was sending dirty messages to someone else that would be the end of it, 5 years or not! That is completely disrespectful and I view it as... (read in full...)
How do I tell if he has an erection if we are just kissing or hugging?
Q. heya! (i am 16) my boy mate asked me out today and i said yes. It is our first ever relationship for both of us. We haven't kissed yet or hugged or anything but we will soon. The problem is i am just wondering how i would know if he got an erection. ...
A. 27 June 2006: Hey there,
It is possible, since you are both new to the sexual side of life, that he will become excited by just kissing & being close to you. I was very nervous too when I was your age of how to tell! If you are standing up kissing, then you... (read in full...)
My ex made me tell him EVERYTHING and now I feel like I need to tell me current BF everything too! Help!
Q. Ok my ex was VERY controlling. He made me tell him everything i had done in the past with people sexually and what i thought or talked about with people. This was when I didn't even know him so why he wanted to know, i don't know! Now that i have a...
A. 27 June 2006: Hey there,
I'm so sorry that this bad past experience has left you feeling like this. I hate that people can think they can control us like this aye! What a horrible man your ex turned out to be and a big congrats to you for getting out and find... (read in full...)
He dropped the 'L' bomb & I don't feel the same....yet! Do I get out quick?
Q. I have been casually seeing a guy for a month and like him but am not head over heels. The thing is he told me last night that he thinks he is falling in love with me. I am not falling in love with him!!!! My instinct is to run but he is actually ok ...
A. 26 June 2006: Hey there,
A month is a really short amount of time to get to know someone in so do not feel at all bad that you don't feel the same. It just means that you aren't at the same place he is, but that doesn't mean you won't ever be!
Was he ... (read in full...)
My online fiance has suddenly disappeared! Help!
Q. I have been dating a guy online for 5 months. He lives in another country so we email every day and talk on the phone every weekend. He is so wonderful. I went to meet him (in the other country) around our 4 month anniversary. We had already t...
A. 26 June 2006: Hey there,
So he disappeared pretty much straight after you got back from seeing him? Is it possible that he just completely freaked out and did a runner? I'm not saying YOU freaked him out but the whole situation possibly could have 'caught'... (read in full...)
This counsellor isn't helping our marital problems, so would choosing another one help?
Q. My wife and I are seperated, but going to counselling to try to sort things out. She has found the last two sessions very upsetting, and will not go back to that counsellor. The upsets are more to do with herself,(ie how she sees things/reacts to ...
A. 25 June 2006: Hmm....well, I am no expert and I most certainly haven't had training in the councelling industry BUT my instinct is telling me something here. Why would a qualified councellor tell you that your wife is basically not fit for councelling? I mean, ... (read in full...)
We want to try the "back door" but I'm worried it might hurt...
Q. Does anal sex hurt? Me and my bf have always joked about it and said we never would, but we were drunk and tried it but it wouldn't go in properly. Now I'm kind of turned on by the idea and want to try it again. Will it hurt if he goes in deeper?...
A. 25 June 2006: Hey there,
In one word - YES it does hurt BUT use plenty of lube (KY jelly) and I do mean PLENTY and go very very very slow. You have to be completely relaxed as if you're not you will clench up and it will hurt even more. The first few times do... (read in full...)
This counsellor isn't helping our marital problems, so would choosing another one help?
Q. My wife and I are seperated, but going to counselling to try to sort things out. She has found the last two sessions very upsetting, and will not go back to that counsellor. The upsets are more to do with herself,(ie how she sees things/reacts to ...
A. 25 June 2006: Hi there,
Congratulations for making the extra committment to getting the wee bit of help you need in making your marriage all that it could be as it is not an easy step to take. I'm not married but my partner and I have been to councell... (read in full...)
Been married for a year but am starting to lose interest in this marriage! Help!
Q. Should I leave my husband? I have been married for a year. I have started to lose interest in this marriage and I don't know what to do. We hardly make love. He has a low sex-drive and we hardly make out once a week. That's not healthy for a...
A. 23 June 2006: Hi there,
How long were you with this man before you were married?
You have only been married a year - early early early days yet! You took vows just a year ago for better or worse so you owe it to yourself AND to your marriage to make... (read in full...)
My long-distance BF admitted he doesn't want to be with me but he says he loves me - what do I do?
Q. I have been with my long-distance boyfriend for over a year and after a few months I cheated on him but it was only a kiss and he knows but he always makes me feel guilty for it and hangs out with lots of girls and I think it is to get back at me. ...
A. 22 June 2006: I totally agree with Irish here.
Life is too short to spend it with someone who treats you like this. Be true to yourself and to your heart. NO ONE should EVER make you feel like this! and if they do and they keep doing it, like your so-calle... (read in full...)
Normal first period?
Q. Okay, well, I sort of have a problem. I'm not sure if i got my period or not. I was at the beach the previous Sunday and when i came back, the inside of my bikini bottom was a brownish color and im 12 so i figured I probably just got my period but ...
A. 22 June 2006: Hey there,
Don't worry about this sweetie. I got my first period when I was 12 at the beach too actually and I FREAKED coz it wasn't like you expect it - red and well, like blood! It was thick and brown and looked bloody disgusting (no pun inte... (read in full...)
Should I give up my high paid job as a doctor (that I hate) to follow the career I love?
Q. Should I leave a job that pays $200,000 a year because I don't like it? Okay I'm a doctor, but I seriously hate my job. I've been taking online classes and have recievied a BA in marketing and a MBA. I've also received a offer as an adveritising ...
A. 22 June 2006: Happiness is more important than money....how you feel in yourself....so follow your heart and never look back!... (read in full...)
I get a thrill...!
Q. When I'm with my boyfriend is suddenly get a huge adrenalin rush. Is this good or bad ? ...
A. 21 June 2006: Hi there,
What a wonderful feeling to have! Relish in it and embrace it. It is pure love. xxx... (read in full...)
He never got around to talking to me much, except online. Now he's not there, either, so how can I get to know him?
Q. Ok this is an interesting problem if you are able to tackle it or give me an idea. It might be long but its worth it. I will thank you much if you can give me a clue to anything. Well, There is this shy guy I know whom I went to high school with...
A. 16 June 2006: Hey there,
This guy must mean a lot to you huh, since you are so cut up about him not being online and wanting to get to know him so bad. If you feel this strongly, then don't give up because there is obviously something very strong that keeps yo... (read in full...)
I just want to be able to discuss disagreements without blowing my top...
Q. Sometimes when my bf and I argue, I end up yelling at him, giving him the silent treatment, or crying. I know these are really bad habits to have because it makes me look irrational and as if I can't talk to him like a normal person. How can a ...
A. 16 June 2006: I know exactly how you feel! It sucks when you just can't communicate properly with the one you love, and they can't communicate with you either! You are in a pattern right now that isn't good. The way you deal with conflict/discussions will set the ... (read in full...)
I know my GF is cheating on me! What do I say to her?
Q. What do I do to tell me girlfriend I know she cheating on me and not hurt her.....
A. 16 June 2006: Hi there.
Are you hurt? Why are you thinking of her feelings first when she is the one cheating?
Tell her outright that you know and demand some answers! xxx... (read in full...)
I have just found out that I am dying and don't know how to tell my partner
Q. I have just found out that I am dying, but have just got engaged last week. My fiancee has noticed that I am crying all the time and keeps asking what is wrong, she seems to think I have guilty feelings about something and is starting to accuse m...
A. 15 June 2006: ...because once in your life, whatever she was to the world she becomes everything to you. When you look her in the eyes, travelling to the depths of her soul, and you say a millon things without a trace of sound, you know that your own life is ... (read in full...)
Been friends for 3 years, but I have fallen for her....
Q. Ok so I've been told by a lot of my friends that I should go ahead and tell this girl that I like her. Now this girl and I have been friends for 3 years, we're really close. But she's 24 (I'm 19). So I've been "crushing major" as quoted ...
A. 15 June 2006: Hey there,
Isn't Clueless a great movie!? "I totally paused!" hehehe
Sorry. Okay. I was friends with my man for 5 years before I worked up the courage to write him a letter pouring out my heart & soul to him and I was totally freaked ... (read in full...)
BF of 16 years is abusive & an alcoholic - have tried to leave many times but I keep coming back! I need help!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for sixteen years. We have kids together. He has always been a heavy drinker, but i'm sick of this life. He has lost his driving licence three times due to this and still on a ban. We have just come back from a h...
A. 15 June 2006: Hey!
This man has no respect for you or your children by the sounds of it. He hits you. That should be enough of a push you need to leave for not only your sake, but for your childrens future too.
I know you think you love this man but how... (read in full...)
Is it normal that when we have sex it's so messy?
Q. 'Everytime' I have sex with my girlfriend when I ejaculate pretty much all my cum floods back out of her as soon as I pull out which as you could imagine is messy.. Is this normal and what does it mean!?!? How much is meant to stay in her? This is ...
A. 15 June 2006: Hi there,
Don't worry yourself at all about this! If you were trying to get pregnant then you would have to try ways to keep it inside her (standing on her head, installing a plug hehehe) but if you're not then a little bita gooey mess never hu... (read in full...)
I cheated on my BF but I don't feel guilty....what can this mean?
Q. Hi, i'm really confused. I cheated on my BF of 2 years (never done anything like that before) and I dont feel guilty and its really upsetting me. When I think of the future all I see is my BF but if I dont feel guilty then how can it work? What can ...
A. 15 June 2006: Martini - I think she means that what is upsetting her is the fact that she doesn't feel guilty.... ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my BF but I don't feel guilty....what can this mean?
Q. Hi, i'm really confused. I cheated on my BF of 2 years (never done anything like that before) and I dont feel guilty and its really upsetting me. When I think of the future all I see is my BF but if I dont feel guilty then how can it work? What can ...
A. 15 June 2006: Hi there,
The first thing you need to do is ask yourself what drove you to cheat on him in the first place. If you look towards your future and all you see if you and him together, then WHY did you cheat on him?
It sounds to me that you do l... (read in full...)
How should I get this boy?
Q. I like a boy and i think that he likes me but he wnt go out with me because we live so far away frm each other and i realy want to be with him what shuld i do?...
A. 14 June 2006: Hi there,
This is a tricky one because of the distance issue so the only thing I can suggest is that you start slowly and don't put too much pressure on things to work out. Distance is hard enough with the added pressure of have a long distance... (read in full...)
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