My husband has touched my daughter... how do I deal with it?
Q. My daughter who is 19 has suffered from depression for the past 3 years, she is on tablets and struggles to sleep. I have tried to talk to her to help her to try find out why. She finally opened up to her CPN at the end of november, she told them ...
A. 7 April 2010: I can't remember if I said this before: when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. You have no obligation to him whatsoever. You have no reason to feel guilt or take even an inch of blame for the pending divorce. You were a ... (read in full...)
He's much older than me..will this be a problem?
Q. I am carrying this kind of problem everyday. I am confused and i don't know what is best and right to do. I currently having a relationship with a guy who is older than me and separated from him wife. I am 23 years old and he is 50 years of age....
A. 9 February 2010: I understand what female anon is trying to say and I appreciate her comments, but its not quite that way for everyone. My man is over 60 and our sex life is the best I have ever had. Its less frequent than my previous relationship at about twice a ... (read in full...)
He's much older than me..will this be a problem?
Q. I am carrying this kind of problem everyday. I am confused and i don't know what is best and right to do. I currently having a relationship with a guy who is older than me and separated from him wife. I am 23 years old and he is 50 years of age....
A. 8 February 2010: I also come from a culture where pleasing your parents is everything. Yet I have disappointed mine many times and was the last to get a degree when everyone else had already done their masters. I got divorced which is a big NO in my family. So when ... (read in full...)
I'm dating a married man, he wants sex, but if I give it he might break up with me
Q. i am dating this married guy, i am married too. i am 18 years old and he is 32. i know is kinda crazy but im really attracted to him. we met by our job, it was my first time i worked and damm! it happened, i am so into him, maybe is because i have ...
A. 2 February 2010: I think your husband is right that you are acting weird.. I suspect a mental illness in this case. Just read her posts and tell me she has all her marbles..... (read in full...)
I feel I have been pushed into child access arrangements
Q. Me and my long tearm boyfriend split up this week. We have a 2 month old baby and we both agreed that, he would have are daughter for 3 day at his home and 1 night. This means that I would be takeing care of her for 4 days and 6 nights. Their is ...
A. 1 February 2010: Wow this post has taken off! To the mother: I think you truly know your baby daddy more than we could and you insist that he has already proven himself so far. So since you have made a decision, just monitor as closely as possible and watch the ... (read in full...)
Bad relationship with my husbands kids! How can I change things?
Q. Several years ago I got involved with an older, married man. At the time I thought it was simply a short fling, but it developed into a relationship that eventually led to him leaving his wife. I do not feel the need to go into the 'gritty' ...
A. 31 January 2010: When I first read this message I was about to type a reply that would for sure get me banned from the site. Having taken a deep breath, I thought I would tell you what a family friend did that worked miracles, although something tells me you won't ... (read in full...)
He's much older than me..will this be a problem?
Q. I am carrying this kind of problem everyday. I am confused and i don't know what is best and right to do. I currently having a relationship with a guy who is older than me and separated from him wife. I am 23 years old and he is 50 years of age....
A. 31 January 2010: As long as he is not cheating on his wife then I don't see a problem with seeing him. Personally when I have dated older men I have been treated better, they are more faithful, more stable. Better than the roller coaster of a young guy who is still ... (read in full...)
My wife lacks interest in certain sex acts, I like. How do I convince her to keep trying?
Q. My questions are simple, I have been married for quite a while we always have had a good sex life. I know that as you get somewhat older it will slowdown. We always tried different things had a good mix 3 to 4 times a week when younger, now we will ...
A. 31 January 2010: I think she has gotten to the stage where she just can't be bothered. She is in a comfort zone and you need to wake her up! First is always communication, telling her exactly what you want and also being sure to ask her what she likes too. Ask ... (read in full...)
My husband has touched my daughter... how do I deal with it?
Q. My daughter who is 19 has suffered from depression for the past 3 years, she is on tablets and struggles to sleep. I have tried to talk to her to help her to try find out why. She finally opened up to her CPN at the end of november, she told them ...
A. 31 January 2010: Your first priority is your daughter who has survived this abuse and then the younger kids. Ofcourse its normal for you to feel sympathy for him but many men go through trauma as well bit they don't abuse their kids to get through their pain. My ... (read in full...)
I got my sis to speak to my wife about sending money to another man. Now she says I can thank my sis for her dirvorcing me.
Q. Hi everyone...im in alot of confusion and disbelief... ok so on monday the 26th my wife used my credit card to send money to some guy names Ivan...so i texted my 2 of my sisters and asked them to ask her what was going on cause i tried texting ...
A. 31 January 2010: You need to think with your head right now, not with your heart. We all know that the Ivan story is implausable because she could have asked her mother, your sisters or even her friend, Ivan's 'girlfriend' to get it. Or why didn't she text you that ... (read in full...)
Going to sleep with a man I work with. How can I get over my flaws and be more confident in bed?
Q. I met this man a year ago. We work together. We find each other really attractive and have finally decided to sleep together (once). There are no long term plans, we just want to have fun together. What I want to know is how can I make sure I ...
A. 31 January 2010: The key to explosive sex is to be completely uninhibited. Ofcourse agree beforehand what you won't do eg. If you are not into anal and then he decides to try it .... Awwwkward! But don't try hide your body, do it like you don't have a care in the ... (read in full...)
Can low testosterone/depression make you think you no longer love your partner?
Q. Following extensive cancer treatment (testicular) including chemo and surgery my H (age 39) has now been told he has low testosterone althouygh his last reading was 10 and his LH levels were up. 10 apparantly was considered normal even though he has ...
A. 31 January 2010: I would usually say a man behaving like this has a mistress but given his history its unlikely. It sounds more like he is depressed and lacking in confidence. Its one thing getting your manhood attacked (testicular cancer) but its quite another to ... (read in full...)
I got my sis to speak to my wife about sending money to another man. Now she says I can thank my sis for her dirvorcing me.
Q. Hi everyone...im in alot of confusion and disbelief... ok so on monday the 26th my wife used my credit card to send money to some guy names Ivan...so i texted my 2 of my sisters and asked them to ask her what was going on cause i tried texting ...
A. 31 January 2010: Your wife is manipulating your dependancy on her. She is the one in the wrong and she needs to explain WTH Ivan is and why he is getting the money you are dicing with death to earn. So give her space for a couple of weeks. If you keep calling and ... (read in full...)
Wet and dry...what can I do?
Q. my boyfriend and i regularly attempt to have sex but my vagina one day can be very wet and the next day be bone dry and it can go for periods for example a week being dry and then suddenly the next week completely wet. i jus want it to be ...
A. 31 January 2010: During ovulation (when you release an egg) your vagina has more moisture. This happens about 2 weeks before your period and that mucus is what sperm needs to swim through your cervix to the egg. So its common for you to be drier at other times. To ... (read in full...)
I need to reassure my husband who is feeling insecure about his penis size..what should I say?
Q. I have a question I have been married for sometime. I have only had sex with 2 guys the first guy I was with was somewhat bigger than my husband and we had trouble. My husband and I were talking about sex and the past and I mention that the first ...
A. 31 January 2010: Ladies, the man you are with should always know he is "the biggest you have ever had". Unless he is being an ass and you want to bring his ego crashing down. Really, there is no point in telling a man that you love that his penis size is pathetic ... (read in full...)
Had unprotected sex but have had a period since then, cud I be pregnant?
Q. me and my ex b.f. had unprotective sex..i think im pregnant..but i have had my period since we had sex...is it possible for me to be pregnant.?...
A. 31 January 2010: The reason the blood builds up in the lining of your uterus is to nourish a newly fertilised egg (embryo). If you shed that lining by having a normal period then the egg either was not fertilised or it didn't implant. So it cannot survive without ... (read in full...)
I feel I have been pushed into child access arrangements
Q. Me and my long tearm boyfriend split up this week. We have a 2 month old baby and we both agreed that, he would have are daughter for 3 day at his home and 1 night. This means that I would be takeing care of her for 4 days and 6 nights. Their is ...
A. 30 January 2010: Celiaaletta: my message was directed at the mother who posted the question, not at you. So no need for "double standard" accusations. You are clearly not a mother and my comment was directed to someone who had actually experienced motherhood my ... (read in full...)
How can I stop being gay?
Q. I need help!!..Long story short Im 20yo n have had a pretty normal life..well.. I am gay.. but I hate it..I wish I wasnt gay. I dont know why or at what point in my life I became this way... Id like to know why I turned gay.. think about it all the ...
A. 30 January 2010: I'm sorry about what you are going through; it can be a lonely experience to feel you are abnormal and don't fit in. I would encourage you to look in your telephone book and phone your local Gay and Lesbian association. They usually have counselors ... (read in full...)
How do I convince my ex I lust after her?
Q. My ex-wife and I have been divorced for 3 years. We were married for 10 years and have 3 beautiful children together. We are both very involved in our children's life and communicate on an almost daily basis. Mostly regarding the children. She ...
A. 30 January 2010: Are you sure you are not my ex?!! Similar situation and he has been hitting on me lately and the other day sent a text saying "I want u 2 b my girl"!!. If I didn't have a boyfriend, I would want him to be a little more passionate about his ... (read in full...)
I feel I have been pushed into child access arrangements
Q. Me and my long tearm boyfriend split up this week. We have a 2 month old baby and we both agreed that, he would have are daughter for 3 day at his home and 1 night. This means that I would be takeing care of her for 4 days and 6 nights. Their is ...
A. 30 January 2010: It is a bad idea to pack off your child for a night away at this young age. Who are you doing this for? Your baby or the father? A baby's routine should not be interrupted for the first 6 months to 1 year of life. Stability is key to a well ... (read in full...)
What sort of man would do this to his child
Q. I have had a married lover for over 25years, when I met him he was not married, anyway I have 1 son with him and he has 3 sons with his wife, he paid child support for the child for 19 years, But he (my son) caught us talking dirty on the internet ...
A. 30 January 2010: Its nothing unusual that many men only bond with the children of the woman they love. I even know men who have abandoned their own children and are with new women and they look after their step children (new woman's own kids) better than their own. ... (read in full...)
How do I let him know I don`t want to accept his proposal?
Q. my boyfriends mates have let on to me that my boyfriend is going to propose to me on valentines day after weeks of planning. but i don't want to make the commitment. Not because i don't love him, but i just dont want to. How can i let him down after ...
A. 30 January 2010: There is a chance that you might be the victim of an early April Fool's prank from a bunch of 15 year old boys with nothing better to do. I remember seeing tricks like this centuries ago. Just brush it off. Anyway, a proposal doesn't mean you ... (read in full...)
A guy proposed to me online, then he saw a photo of me and changed his mind. Now he just wants friendship. Please help!
Q. so here is my problem....There is a boy whom i love madly. v met on facebook n then after some days of chatting, he proposed me. i told him to think again n see my photo 1st of all bt he said that he love me for what i am and will never leave me ...
A. 30 January 2010: My advice is that you drop this rubbish guy. You are the one who deserves better. Do you know that there are men who think Aishwarayi Rai is ugly? But do you think that would ever stop her from living her life? Forget about this guy and meet ... (read in full...)
I am thinking of coming fwd now the guy who molested me has been convicted of doing it to another.
Q. Anyone with legal knowledge. Advice would help. Here's my situation: This is difficult to share. I am currently 23 years old. I live in Texas. When I was in my early teens, 14 actually, I was participating in a summer track league. We would...
A. 29 January 2010: I would also commend you for wanting to take this step. You are doing the right thing. Perhaps the best thing would be for you to phone your local police precinct and ask about this. Or perhaps the police in the state where the event occurred? ... (read in full...)
Every time I let him come back and get "sucked" back in because I care about him. Help..what should I do?
Q. I have been married to my husband for 4 years. This is both of our second marriage. He had 2 kids and I had 4 kids from our previous marriages. We now have a 2 yr. daughter together for a total of 7 kids. This man can be loving to me and the ...
A. 29 January 2010: Why don't you try couples counseling or try a marriage enrichment course. Perhaps each of you never dealt with the reasons why you broke up your previous marriages so maybe you have taken the same habits into your current one. With fighting and ... (read in full...)
Every time I let him come back and get "sucked" back in because I care about him. Help..what should I do?
Q. I have been married to my husband for 4 years. This is both of our second marriage. He had 2 kids and I had 4 kids from our previous marriages. We now have a 2 yr. daughter together for a total of 7 kids. This man can be loving to me and the ...
A. 29 January 2010: Why don't you try couples counseling or try a marriage enrichment course. Perhaps each of you never dealt with the reasons why you broke up your previous marriages so maybe you have taken the same habits into your current one. With fighting and ... (read in full...)
I love my husband but he acts like if I want to be with him I am taking up all his time
Q. I have been married for two years now and this is my second marriage.. I am trying to learn from mistakes from the first one. For example. My first husband and I did nothing together even when we were at home alone we were in seperate rooms and ...
A. 29 January 2010: A relationship has to be balanced. You can't ignore each other all the time. Similarly, you can't be in each other's face all the time neither. Maybe he feels you smother him and don't give him his space. So develop your own interests; meet the ... (read in full...)
I felt left out of the dinner convo. Should I not see my guy friend tonight so he does not think he is getting off lightly.
Q. I attended a friend's meal the other night. It was at my guy friend friend's house. I cooked dinner and it went well in general, until both of them chirped on about their faith and music interests. As the night progressed, I felt left out and ...
A. 29 January 2010: For goodness sake just let it go. This is a minor issue. You don't always have to be the center of attention. Guys like women who they can take to a party for example and they can mingle on their own without clinging to the boyf for reassurance. ... (read in full...)
I am a 51 year old male who is having a problem maintaining an erection.
Q. I am a 51 year old male who is having a problem maintaining an erection. I am able to get an erection during foreplay and by stroking myself, when it comes time to penetrate, my erection goes soft. My girl friend who I love dearly, is wonderful, ...
A. 29 January 2010: At your age its possible that your sexual performance begins to decline a little. Instead of everyday twice a day you are possibly looking at once or twice a week! But the overwhelming problem in these situations is often performance anxiety. This ... (read in full...)
Smelly vagina. How can I keep this smell away?
Q. Why does my Flower smell badly sometimes like something is rotten inside. Im 25 Years old. But then other days it doesnt have a smell at all? Could it be if i use tampons that is making the smell? Because 2weeks ago when my period started the first ...
A. 29 January 2010: Have you checked to make sure you don't have an infection? Bacterial Vaginosis has a foul odour and can cause a yellowish/ greenish discharge. Its also very common and easily treatable. The doctor/nurse will take a swab and the lab will analyse it ... (read in full...)
I'm thinking of using hair removal cream for my pubic area.
Q. im thinking of using hair removal cream for my pubic area. any advice? any brand suggestions? should i use it on my scrotum also?...
A. 29 January 2010: Veet only delays hair growth by about a day or two longer than shaving. Ingrown hair depends on if you are already prone to this when you shave your face. If you are black you will most likely get in-grown hairs which appear as horrible pimples when ... (read in full...)
How important is having hair to being attractive to women?
Q. After all these years of having sex I finally got to where penis size is not an issue. It's actually very funny to me now. Now I have a whole new body image issue. I'm losing my hair. I'm getting the sex I just dreamed of when I was 18 because ...
A. 28 January 2010: If you are stinking rich then its no problem!!!! If you are losing your hair then it's important to keep it trimmed and neat then it looks like you take care of yourself. If you let the back and sides grow out with the apple pie top (think Bozo the ... (read in full...)
I'm thinking of using hair removal cream for my pubic area.
Q. im thinking of using hair removal cream for my pubic area. any advice? any brand suggestions? should i use it on my scrotum also?...
A. 28 January 2010: I'm assuming you are white? If so, you can use hair removal cream on your pubic area, but don't leave it too long (use shortest time on instructions), and be 100% sure you avoid the tip of your penis. If cream goes on the sensitive tip it will be ... (read in full...)
We have unprotected sex a lot, but I don't fall pregnant
Q. I'm 18 years old and my boyfriend and I have sex a lot and he doesn't pull out. He never does. But I still don't get pregnant. and I don't take birth control or anything. Is this something I should worry about?...
A. 28 January 2010: What you should be worried about is the fact that you are having unprotected sex and risking pregnancy at your age and with someone who has not indicated that they want a baby with you. If you get pregnant then what? Are you trying to trap him? Does ... (read in full...)
Can high blood pressure medication change someone's personality?
Q. Can high blood pressure medication change someone's personality? When my boyfriend doesn't takes his, he is awful! His combative personality almost destroyed our relationship early on, then his doctor switched his BP meds and magically he mellowed ...
A. 28 January 2010: I don't think you will get an accurate answer here as you may need a professional, but when my grandmother hasn't taken her BP meds she goes a little crazy or hallucinates. One time, we all forgot to make sure she had taken it in the morning and she ... (read in full...)
I'm dating a married man, he wants sex, but if I give it he might break up with me
Q. i am dating this married guy, i am married too. i am 18 years old and he is 32. i know is kinda crazy but im really attracted to him. we met by our job, it was my first time i worked and damm! it happened, i am so into him, maybe is because i have ...
A. 28 January 2010: Wait a minute; are we being Punk'd? Or maybe in high school?? Do you think us adults are here to play this game with you? You seriously need to grow up because when your husband finds out it won't be so funny. ... (read in full...)
In order for them to 'improve' their own life and become strong men, I have to boot them out! Right?
Q. Hi, I'm a 53 year old lady, with 3 kids. Husband and I are divorced and he works away, in another area of the country. My kids are all adults, 2 sons aged 29 and 18, 1 daughter, aged 31. The older 2 kids have 'boomeranged' back to living here with ...
A. 28 January 2010: Another suggestion is find them a flat/apartment and then while they are out move their stuff there. Pay first month rent if possible and a few basic groceries. Then leave them to bicker amongst themselves how they are going to live. If you just ... (read in full...)
In order for them to 'improve' their own life and become strong men, I have to boot them out! Right?
Q. Hi, I'm a 53 year old lady, with 3 kids. Husband and I are divorced and he works away, in another area of the country. My kids are all adults, 2 sons aged 29 and 18, 1 daughter, aged 31. The older 2 kids have 'boomeranged' back to living here with ...
A. 27 January 2010: OMG! I can't believe you even feel guilty about this. By putting your foot down you are turning your sons into better men. Both need to 'go out into the world to seek their fortune', as they used to say. Whenever you start to feel bad just remember ... (read in full...)
Bending over got me a new name with my partner!
Q. My common-law partner and I have been together for almost 8 years. I have never been unfaithful nor would I ever consider that as an option. My partner on the other hand has. The problem however is not the past affairs but an incident that ...
A. 27 January 2010: He is being manipulative and I'm sorry to say might be cheating. Men do this either to cover up the guilt of cheating, or to just put you down. Its possible that his friend said a comment about how attractive you are and now he is consumed with ... (read in full...)
Is being gay and christian all right?
Q. I've been a converted chrstian for a year now. Most of the time, i'm into guys and its great. But recently i've been liking this girl whom i'm not sure is into girls. That aside, what i'm more worried about is 'is it ok to b gay and christian?' ...
A. 27 January 2010: This is a very difficult one, because the Bible which is the basis for Christianity does regard same sex relationships as a sin. Don't all scream at me, that's what it says and I can give you endless references. But at the end of the day, nobody, ... (read in full...)
Is being gay and christian all right?
Q. I've been a converted chrstian for a year now. Most of the time, i'm into guys and its great. But recently i've been liking this girl whom i'm not sure is into girls. That aside, what i'm more worried about is 'is it ok to b gay and christian?' ...
A. 27 January 2010: This is a very difficult one, because the Bible which is the basis for Christianity does regard same sex relationships as a sin. Don't all scream at me, that's what it says and I can give you endless references. But at the end of the day, nobody, ... (read in full...)
How do I tell her I love her but can't see her anymore?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles. Have appreciated your advice in the past and need it again now please. Having weighed up previous advice, I now realise I can't go on with things as they are. I am in love with my best friend (who is female) and while other ...
A. 27 January 2010: Wait a minute; you are in love with her so to prove this you are going to dump her and end your friendship?? I understand what you are trying to do, but as a woman if a guy told me he thinks we shouldnt see each other, my answer would be "Ok, cool. ... (read in full...)
I like it tight! Do you think I should only go for virgins?
Q. Hi,this question might sound funny,but it's troubling me so much.I've had sexual experience when i was very young and it felt so good,now i'm in my mid twenties and all the girls i've dated in my adult life are loose,even my present girl's pussy is ...
A. 27 January 2010: Just don't go around stretching all the vaginas of Nigeria; because what are you going to do when the Nigerian virgins run out?
I always ask myself what people mean when they say a vagina is too loose.. I have had 3 vaginal births but without any ... (read in full...)
I thought we had a loving and trusting relationship but he cheated on me for at least a year, Did he EVER love me?
Q. Hi, I was wondering whether I could have your honest advice. Well there's actually two things I want your opinion on. Firstly, a week ago I found out my boyfriend of nine years had been cheating on me with another girl for at least a ...
A. 27 January 2010: You are literally describing me. I completely understand what you are going through. I chose to end my marriage after the infidelity. I no longer believed anything he told me. Even when he shed tears to beg for me back I didn't buy it. Now a few ... (read in full...)
I was raped and need advice on what to do
Q. i'am really lost and really do not know what to do, it's really hard to say but i have not told anyone in the 2years that it has happened. i was raped when i was 15 there was more to it, as i formed an attachment towards this man. he was a security ...
A. 27 January 2010: You have taken the first step to getting free; well done. You have already received lots of excellent advice. I just wanted to add that it is perfectly normal to feel sympathy for your abuser. I recently dealt with a 9 year old girl who insisted ... (read in full...)
I like it tight! Do you think I should only go for virgins?
Q. Hi,this question might sound funny,but it's troubling me so much.I've had sexual experience when i was very young and it felt so good,now i'm in my mid twenties and all the girls i've dated in my adult life are loose,even my present girl's pussy is ...
A. 27 January 2010: I won't say the first words that came to my mind because for sure I will have my instant posting privileges taken away for profanities. But I will say this; its not the girl's fault; it is because your penis is too small. The girls are probably ... (read in full...)
Can low testosterone/depression make you think you no longer love your partner?
Q. Following extensive cancer treatment (testicular) including chemo and surgery my H (age 39) has now been told he has low testosterone althouygh his last reading was 10 and his LH levels were up. 10 apparantly was considered normal even though he has ...
A. 25 January 2010: I can only imagine what you are going through and I commend you for supporting him through this. I doubt though that you will get the help you need here; you need professional support. But in my opinion, hormonal problems would certainly affect him ... (read in full...)
I'm dating a married man, he wants sex, but if I give it he might break up with me
Q. i am dating this married guy, i am married too. i am 18 years old and he is 32. i know is kinda crazy but im really attracted to him. we met by our job, it was my first time i worked and damm! it happened, i am so into him, maybe is because i have ...
A. 23 January 2010: Child, just go through the posts here and read about the mistresses who have been waiting forever, some 20 years for the man to leave his wife; they hardly ever do. Have you ever stopped to think of what the poor wife is going through while you are ... (read in full...)
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