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How much will it cost per month to have a girlfriend? Outings,gas, gifts, clothes? I need to factor the cost into my budget

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Question - (1 September 2013) 22 Answers - (Newest, 3 September 2013)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

How much does a girlfriend cost per month? Do not bother replying if you say "priceless" or "too much" as those sayings are far too old and a scapegoat. Women, don't bother replying with bs that you are free, and don't tell me that you always pay for yourself, because it's obvious that happens very rarely.

I know that a girlfriend = price of gas to drive her around, restaurants/movies/special event fees, gifts, clothes, things to make you look better.

I am thinking about getting out of the single life but I have a mortgage and other bills so I want to make sure I can budget in the price of a girlfriend.

So how much does a girlfriend cost per month?

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (3 September 2013):

So_Very_Confused agony auntIt depends on the girl.

some girls want fine dining and fancy clubs and gifts.

some girls want vacations and gifts and dinners out etc

some girls want to stay home, order a pizza and play board games....

some women will want you groomed properly.. eyebrow waxing at a chop shop, manicure and pedicure for my hubby with tip runs him about 75 every 5 weeks or so.... his haircuts about 20 before tip every 3 weeks...

clothes... well it depends on your style... do not dress to impress a woman as you will a. not want to and b. not be able to afford to maintain that style.

first thing you need to do is figure out who you are and how you wish to present yourself....

my husband for example... he wears the same thing every day. jeans and a black tee shirt (golf shirt for work) that's it. So if i did not like how he dressed I would not have dated him.

then you figure out what you like to do... are you athletic... well then you should find a girl who likes that too.

for us it's board games... those run abou 50 dollars a game... so for us a lot of our expenses while dating were buying board games i lost to my last husband in the divorce.

other expenses when we were dating... he paid to fix my car after he hit a pole... he paid for dinner and my tolls I paid for gas and wear and tear on the car...

until YOU figure out who YOU are and what YOU like and want... the rest does not matter.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2013):

I wouldn't worry about the cost so much. Let love take its course, and with the right lady, perhaps you won't be so eager to budget everything.

Being up-front with a fairly low-maintenance lady about what you're willing to do and what role you expect both parties to play will get you a long way.

My honey does have a category in his budget for "dates," but I would say that we split these in turns, or about 55% him and 45% me -- he makes at least twice what I do.

If he wants to do something that I can't afford, I NEVER ask if he'll pay for me too. I tell him that I can't join, wish him a great time, hug and kiss him, and leave it alone. He's straightforward. If he wants to/is able to pay, he'll offer, and if he doesn't or isn't, he'll say so.

As far as gifts, I would say whenever the mood moves you. $100 a month? This is something you can't really budget in, because you don't know when you'll be inspired.

Gas is and should be split, I think. With my pairing, my car is far newer and fuel-efficient, so I buy gas and he buys dinner, or something similar. Feel free to say something like, "Hey babe, would you mind chipping in a few bucks for gas, since I got ______?"

I still think the first few dates should be on the initiator. Since I was very new in town and very broke when I met my sweetie, he picked up about 80% of our first few outings. Still, when I happened to sneak a peek at the bill for a nice restaurant where he'd gotten me sake, a huge dinner, dessert, etc. I gave him a $20 despite his insistence on paying -- he didn't say no. I still felt like I was being wooed, and he didn't have to pay the whole thing. Everyone wins.

As far as clothing, he has not bought one whit of new clothing since I've met him. He has bought me some lingerie, his logic being that it's "for" him, so he should pay for it. The total over a 1.5-year relationship has not gone over $100.

His Christmas budget for me was about $75.

He's taken me to the spa 5 times over the course of our relationship, total cost probably being $250.

It's honestly not that much if you are a fairly egalitarian couple (you can still be romantic). Just plan on a few hundred the first couple weeks.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2013):

Buy a dog,atleast it will love you back..

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2013):

It shouldn't cost that much more than your current lifestyle. if it does then you're being a fake in your relationship because it means you're being totally different just because you now have a gf.

What I mean is this: if you currently never eat out except at mcdonalds. Then you get a gf and are now wining and dining at fancy expensive restaurants well that's not who you really are is it? You're misrepresenting yourself to her.

If you are a couch potato who spends all weekend playing video games then get a gf and now spend tons of money on trips and entertainment well that's not who you are either, right? Hopefully you're not a couch potato now and are living an interesting life on your own like getting out of the house doing stuff with friends, so having a gf shouldn't make a big difference to your activities (she should be someone who shares your interests) and thus your wallet.

Gifts and clothes? You shouldn't be having to spend a lot of money on gifts otherwise it is like trying to buy someone's affections. Where does buying extra clothes even fit in? You're not supposed to buy a gf clothes, you're not her mom. You're not supposed to buy a ton of new clothes for yourself just because you have a gf, that's being a fake.

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (2 September 2013):

Fatherly Advice agony auntAfter 20 answers I feel I have something to add.

It is not a silly or insensitive question. 20 people were excited enough about the question to answer. Most of them gave good financial advice, even if much of it said "it varies".

So, making the following assumptions, I'm going to try to answer your question with out repeating too much of what you have already heard. I assume that you have not been dating for at least 5 years. I assume that you have never had a close emotional tie to a girlfriend. I assume that you are looking for a long term relationship.

You asked "So how much does a girlfriend cost per month?"

These costs will change as you advance towards your goal of a long term stable relationship.

In the beginning the first cost will be risk. You are going to have to put your self out there and meet people. Embarrassment is another price you will pay because you will make mistakes, you will be rejected. you may even be taken advantage of. The next cost Will be your privacy. You will need to be available for conversation at all hours. You will need to share personal stuff about you self. Another cost that will continue forever is time. You can figure on an hour a day plus a huge chunk of weekends, and that's before you move in. Also I have learned that many modern girls require much more. Additionally your comfort zone is going to need some expansion. As relationships advance you are going to have to meet parents, families and even her girlfriends. You will likely end up trying some foods you have never had. Sports, activities, even religion will come to play as you get to know her better.

I get the feeling that you are pretty good with money. These costs are something you haven't dealt with. I thought they should be mentioned. Don't be scared off. A long ter relationship can be worth all of this. Many of the women who have scoffed at your attitude about money are afraid that you haven't thought about this.

The right girl for you will understand why you asked about the money.

FA

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2013):

I don't think it's a weird question, honest at least, and good to know that you are no one of those who split everything 50/50. I had a guy once who when we desided to have sex stopped by a store and asked to give him some money for condoms, yes, that happened to:)

It depends what girl you will date. If she is like you middle class, she will understand approximately your financial situation and is not going expect too much. and if she is too demanding than she is not for you.

Ussualy it's not really that terribly much. It's may be dinner once a week, or a couple drinks here and there. Concerts: but how often would you go to concerts, may be once every couple months if so. Dinners don't have to be that expensive, at least not every time you go out. And what gifts? My husband when we were dating never gave me any gifts, one time only he bought me a jacket, and when I wanted to pay him back, he didn't take the money, but that was it. You are not spending extra gas on your girlfriend, you are in a car also. I think $300 a month would be pretty generous allowance to spend just on her.

And I also want to say that you mentioned not to say that women pay for themselves, but it is true nowadays. Women work and make good money, and many don't mind contribute for outings or pay for their concert ticket, or take turns. My daughter is your age, her boyfriend few years older. They take turns when they go out out, and is is how it was with them from the very beginning. But when she was looking for a job, he covered rent for a few months, and never asked for his money back.

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A male reader, CMMP United States +, writes (2 September 2013):

A homeless girlfriend will run you about $17 a month, but that's after the panhandling adjustment.

An average woman will cost you anywhere from $50/mo for the McDonald's treatment to $300/mo for the deluxe treatment.

A wealthy or spoiled girl will cost you from $1000/mo to $10,000+, depending on whether or not you own your own helicopter.

I hope this helps.

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A female reader, Aunty Babbit United Kingdom +, writes (1 September 2013):

Aunty Babbit agony auntJust show any potential girlfriend your letter and you won't have to worry about having one!

How can anyone possibly put a price on something like that anyway?

Give us more details and I'll have an accountant look at it for you.

Where does she live in relation to you? Distance must be factored in to work out petrol costs. Where are you going to take her? Costs can then be worked out, ie cinema tickets, Mcdonald's happy meals etc

We will also need to know how many times a week this lucky lady can expect to be "treated" so that we can accurately work out a weekly cost.

Will you be supplying condoms? If so how many do you think you might need and what brand?

I'm guessing you won't need any!

AB

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A female reader, Daisy_Daisy United Kingdom +, writes (1 September 2013):

Daisy_Daisy agony auntOP, in this day and age most women do not expect a boyfriend to pay for everything. When dating I play it by ear but actually prefer to split bills 50/50 or take it in turns. I guess you have to factor in more frequent nights out than usual (unless you often go out with friends anyway) but then when dating progresses to a relationship, the days/ nights out are less frequent and you'll spend time together at each others homes, home cooking etc.

You do not have to buy a woman clothes, gifts, etc, all the time. That's not what it's all about. A decent woman will be happy to go 50/50 with the occasional romantic gesture (which needn't be pricey, just thoughtful).

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (1 September 2013):

chigirl agony auntJust to say one last thing, all the boyfriends I have had have saved money by getting together with me. Because I'm tight on money, so I don't like going out (because I do pay my own way). That means they don't get to go out either, not partying every weekend, not drinking, I don't like smoking so no cigarettes either. I stay at home and cook dinner, and neither of my exes knew how to cook a cheap dinner, so they saved tons of money by eating at my place, even if I did ask for money for the groceries. It was still 1/3 of the cost of what they'd make for themselves.

Do you eat take-out often, or cook at home? If you get with a homebody who likes to cook, then your food budget might very well go down. If you like to go out drinking and clubbing? Get together with someone who doesn't drink, and you will be surprised to see all the money you save on staying home in bed with your girlfriend, rather than going out drinking, paying for the club, paying for drinks, paying for a cab home, paying for a new shirt etc.

If she knows how to stitch the holes in your socks, voila, yet another place you will save money. So don't go thinking it is all expenses. With the right minded girl, who is also focused on saving and having a good financial set-up, you might very well end up saving money. Do you know that if she was to move in with you and pay rent, even if it is just a small sum of money each month, you will save so much more? And even more to save if you get married, because she'll pay for the house then too.

One major factor for why I want to be married one day is finances. Two incomes, it makes it possible to buy a house (there is no way I can buy on my own with these prices until I am 40). Two people to cook dinner for is cheaper than two individuals each making their own dinner. Cooking bigger portions is cheaper when dividing the cost on two, rather than making smaller portions for one person all the time. This is true, I did the math. You also use less money on electricity and other utility bills when you are two. Two people together pay much less than two individuals paying each their own bill.

So, if anything, look ahead at how much money you will save if you can have a good relationship that ends in marriage/cohabitation. You'd have to find a woman who earns her own money and is good with finances too, but you'll find that with ease. If it works out you might even need only one car, and there's a lot of money to save on that. Vacations are cheaper too. I've traveled as a single, and I spent nearly the exact same as when bringing along another person. Hence why I have treated both my brother and my boyfriend to vacations with me. Because the cost of bringing and paying for just one more person (versus going alone) was just 1/5 more.

Oh I can go on and on about this really, because I love budgeting and it's what I do for fun. So I have it all figured out, and a relationship that is solid, especially if you live together, is the number one way of saving money.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (1 September 2013):

chigirl agony auntOh man, what a treat you sound like. Don't bother telling you this or that because you think we are full of BS?

How about if you ask for advice you take what people tell you and actually listen? If you are so dead sure that you already know the answer yourself then "don't bother" ask us.

Girlfriends/boyfriends don't cost you anything you aren't willing to spend as a single person. You gift your friends and family, but you decide yourself how much you are going to spend on a gift, don't you? Same with a girlfriend, you can give a gift, but the cost is up to you. When I have money and can afford it I can go all out and treat my boyfriend to something expensive and amazing. When I'm on a low budget I bake him a cake, or give a hand made card. You know you can even gift people "in nature". Or gift them a service such as cleaning their apartment. You give accord to what you can afford, as it is with ALL gifts to EVERYONE, not just a girlfriend. And if you've got yourself some materialistic woman then .. well, don't be with her if all she's occupied with is how much you give her and how often.

Dinners out? Cook at home. Go dutch. And "don't bother" telling me we women do not pay our way, I don't know what backwater part of the US you are from, but here in Norway we women pay our fair share. And while I was dating my American boyfriend I was paying 70% of all our bills.

Something tells me you've never had a girlfriend before in your life, since you don't have a clue about this. Girlfriends are for free, so try not to talk about it in this manner. You make it sound like you want to hire a prostitute for the girlfriend experience. A real girlfriend is for free. But if you enjoy going out, then going out will cost you money. If you like to go see movies, or go out on dates, then factor in the cost of the cinema and restaurant yourself. If you invite her home for dinner then yes, that should be your treat, but you don't have to cook her lobster. I am sure a home-made stew will taste just as great, and you can watch a movie on the TV if your budget is low.

Or you can take hikes, they are for free. It's perhaps a Norwegian thing though, but we "go for walks" veeeery often. It's our national favourite thing to do. We put on comfortable shoes, warm clothes, and then we walk around for an hour or three. Winter time as well as summer time. This is also how we date, believe it or not. Going out for a walk is a very popular thing to do for couples. And it is free. And healthy. And gives you plenty of time to get to know each other and talk about everything in life. If you want to make a bigger deal out of it, get a tent and camp out for the weekend. Although that will cost you more money.

But get a grip please, you only spend as much as you want to, there is not such thing as a "set price" for a girlfriend. Women like different things, but they pay for their activities themselves, and if they can't afford it, and you can't afford paying for them, then do something low budget at home, it's really not that difficult.

How do you think students date? They have zero income, yet they date.

One word of advice, don't discuss this with a potential girlfriend. I don't plan on having a guy pay my way, but being stingy is still a turn off. If it is heavily embedded in your culture than the man pays, then I suggest a subtle discussion on the matter on the first or second date. Be honest, but avoid sounding stingy. Just tell them that you haven't been dating for a while, and you are curious to know what women expect out of a man, if they expect them to pay or if it is totally okay for a woman to pay for herself. Just ask her what her expectations are, and then subtly tell her what your expectations are. That you do not mind treating a girlfriend to things now and then, but that you feel it shouldn't be expected. The times you treat a person to something it should be a nice treat, or special occasion, not something to be expected because you feel that would take away the charm. You can tell her you'd never expect, or want, a woman to pay your way, if that is how you feel. If you are okay with a woman paying for you occasionally then you can state this as well. But that paying for each other isn't something you want to be a norm in the relationship, and this isn't because you are stingy, but because you take your financial status seriously. You need to have a predictable economy, and you have a certain budget you need to stick to to reach your goals. That will make you sound ambitious, if you word it correctly.

Make sure you smile as you explain this, and make sure you tell her that when you have a girlfriend, you do want to treat her to things, go out, enjoy life and have good times. But that you can only pay for things when you can afford them, and when it feels right, and not as a norm. Make sure you tell her that you don't suspect that she wants you to pay, but that you got the impression that it could be the current norm, and that you just want to discuss it so that you both know where the other stand.

However... it could very well come across as accusing her of being a gold digger who only wants a sugar daddy, so if you bring this up be careful about how you word it.

Or just, don't bring it up, simply leave her with her bill without asking. Treat going dutch as the norm, without talking to her about it, and simply see how she reacts. If she's fine with it, then you have the right woman for you. If she gets offended then pay her way and don't bring her on a second date... Should be easy enough.

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A female reader, Got Issues United Kingdom +, writes (1 September 2013):

Got Issues agony auntSorry, I know you're probably serious but this question sounds really funny. I get where you're coming from, but you're making having a girlfriend sound like buying a car. You don't actually have to pay for everything. There are lots of high maintenance girls who would probably expect you to pay for everything, but a lot of women are also happy to pay their own way.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2013):

You try to use resourcefulness and plan your budget ahead of the date. There are times you can cut costs by planning a good evening at home. You use your imagination to come up with low-cost dates, that have a huge romantic impact.

I save up most of my gift-cards from Christmas and birthdays for this purpose. My friends and family are quite generous and creative; but this is just a suggestion.

Go online, read, research, purchase coupons...even top-notch restaurants offer specials and online coupons just to get people in.

Avoid picky pretentious females. If she's high maintenance, she will smell cheap on you from a mile away. She'd avoid dating you, and her self-elimination would be to your benefit. She'll figure you out by the dates you choose; and the fact you may never leave it up to her.

Research your area for places of local entertainment; to minimize distance, and plot your course of travel. Make comparisons on costs. Most restaurants have menus online and you can figure the general cost and gratuities before you even get there.

Let her order first; she might order high on the menu; then figure your meal down. You asked her out, so it's your treat. You minimize cost by picking the right restaurants.

Dude, I wanted to chime in to save your ass. These women are going to rip you a new one. I can't believe you're serious. I'll still try to help.

You judge cost according to the type of women you wish to date. If she is educated, earns a good-living, has her own place, expect to take her out for nice dining, dancing, theater, or the movies. This might cost up to $185.00 to $250.00 just for an evening. She's worth it, but will probably pitch in.

If you date a woman who is more of a home-body, that means you'll have to compensate by being more romantic. Long drives to the beach, home-cooked meals, good wine, small gifts and flowers. They also like to be taken out; but may not care much for pretentious outings. They still might range over $100.00 on an outing for two.

You date according to your budget, that's what it comes down to. If broke, date less frequently.

If you aim to impress, you have to get up off the cash.

If you're just tight-fisted and your mind is more on the fiscal aspects of dating, you'll spend a lot of time at home alone making love to your hands.

Everyone has a budget, and you don't foolishly go out splurging on a female; knowing it will break the bank.

If she is just looking for someone to spend cash, she most likely would not be attracted to you. She'll look for the guy with the BMW, Mercedes, or Lexus. She will judge by his car. If you drive an economy sedan; she won't set her expectations too high.

It's the quality of your company and how you plan the date that will most likely keep you within budget; and still offer a lady a good time.

Before you purchased a house, you preplanned your budget, you saved, then you sought a house within your range.

Well, use the same formula in dating. Plan how much you want to spend. Research and find the things you'd like to do, save, and setup your date. Be creative.

Look for great atmosphere and esthetics to boggle the mind and provoke the senses. Avoid trendy.

Waterfront and seaside restaurants offer more than expensive food. A place to walk and hold hands. You'll eventually find a favorite, and cost will be predictable.

If your mind is totally on the bottom-line, you can go online and date pitiful desperate women, who just want someone to talk to. Talk is cheap.

I would set aside a budget of no less than $500.00 for at least two good dinners and drinks in a month. A minimum of

$80.00 per week for gas and the movies. Let her chip in for the popcorn and drinks.

Create an entertainment fund. Leave it alone.

That would be about a $1000.00/month total; if you want to date cheap. You don't spend every dime of it up. You leave it aside to use mainly for that purpose. You can use it for other things if emergencies arise. It would also be for self-entertainment, for the dry-spells.

You can purchase a pre-paid credit card specifically for this purpose, and never touch your household funds. These cards can be reloaded, and reused.

I hope I've been helpful, I have certainly been entertained.

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A male reader, TrancedRhythmEar Saudi Arabia +, writes (1 September 2013):

TrancedRhythmEar agony auntLol man this is hilarious. It doesnt sound like u have the proper mindset to start a relationship. Theres alot I can tell by this post. I wouldnt bother with a girl right now.

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A female reader, Abella United States +, writes (1 September 2013):

Abella agony auntSome Good advice here. I will say though that if a potential GF gets even a hint that you count the cost of everything many will put on their running shoes. Not because they have designs on your

money, but because a guy who seems fixated on the Cost of everything and ignores the Value of things is a turn-off.

Who says your life has to follow an exact pattern of predictability. A man in love WANTS to give a gift to a beloved. Gifts are occasional, given with love, they are not a chore. A man in love is filled with joy just sitting beside his beloved.

My view is that a couple in love can sit beside each over just looking at the view, content and loving, and sit in silence sometimes. Because all is right in the work just because they are together.

Whereas if a girl has an expectation of a new gift on a regular basis, if she expects regular handouts as her right, to be bailed out when she requires it, if she demands expensive gifts just because she ''has to have it'' (tantrum if refused), if she not content unless money is being spend on her then you don't have a Gf. Instead you have a gold digger.

And another thing. A couple in love are often prepared to compromise. Because just being together is the BEST thing, no matter where they eat, no matter where they go. Because they adore each other's company.

Whereas IF you have a girl who says, 'I'm not going to live there unless the home has X number bedrooms or Y number of bathrooms then she is not in love with you. Sixteen bathrooms and twenty one bedrooms would not be enough if she does not love you. Insteas she will be a girl out to USE you as her walking piggy bank.

I am concerned for you that your attitude will attract the very girl you don't want - A girl out to find a man gullible enough to think dating is about spending money on a girl on a regular basis.

Instead find a girl who you like and she likes you. In getting to know a girl you can (and should) choose activities that are affordable within your existing budget. A drive to a scenic destination and walk around the area. Maybe a picnic lunch or something you purchase along the way. And modern girls DO share the cost.

Similarly some fun things. So you both hire bicyles for the day and explore an area.

Or you discover what hobbies you each pursue. So if she loves attending particular outdoor events then you could join her one day. If you love playing a sport then she might like to come along to watch.

Building intimacy and a relationship is not about paying out lots of money. Or it should not be about that. I think presents in the first year should be low-key, not extravagant.

Start as you mean to go on.

Birthdays are important to most. At least remember the date you first met. But the way you remember them does not need to be extravagant.

A friend who met her guy in the month that violets flower was touched when her then lovesick beau gave her a bunch of violets on their ''one week anniversary''. (yes he was in love and yes he married her 2 years later). Now every year on the anniversary of the day they met he gives her a bunch of violets. So nothing extravagant. But his romantic streak and his love is expressed by remembering their 'first met' anniversary every year. It's actions like that that keep love alive.

When you meet the right girl you will know. And then you will know that you don't need to spend money to get and keep a girl. Instead you need to know what is important to here, is she right for you and does she feel the same way? And do you feel so utterly at peace with spending time with her, such that your life is made complete, just because she is beside you.

And that one hour with her feels like a minute. That you get excited just thinking about how soon can you see her again. That you never run out of things to talk about with each other. That is likely to be the right girl for you.

Whereas if you find a girl has nothing in common with you. That you have nothing you can talk about without it feeling uncomfortable. That just one minute spent with such a girl feels so awkward and uncomfortable that the minute feels like ten agonizing hours together - then such a girl is not the girl for you.

I wish you well

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A female reader, AuntyEm United Kingdom +, writes (1 September 2013):

AuntyEm agony auntOn paper you could budget as much or as little as you want on a girlfriend but I doubt any woman would want a relationship with you if you are so cold calculating and cut throat about the whole thing. You say women never pay for themselves...this is incorrect, most women will go halves and some even pay for everything...you obviously don't really know how other people are.

You seem pretty bitter, have you had a bad experience in the past?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2013):

You're right in thinking that your expenditure will go up when your dating but it's impossible for you or anyone to predict by how much.

I don't know where exactly you live and how far away you would have to travel to take a girlfriend out. I don't know how much your local restaurants or cinemas cost on average.

No -one knows what your new girlfriend will be like. Some girls are "high-maintenance" and have expensive tastes and expect the guy to pay. Other girls are more down to earth and would be just as happy with a walk in the woods and a picnic than dinner in a fancy restaurant.

Not all women expect the guy to pay for everything. I might on the first date if he'd asked me out. If I'd asked him out I would expect to pay. On subsequent dates I would expect to loosely split the costs e.g. if he paid for dinner I'd pay for the wine. (If the guy earned significantly more than me I'd expect him to shoulder the greater half and I'd do the same if I was the greater earner.)

A relationship is a partnership in which both parties should try to give equally in my opinion.

I assume the clothes you refer to buying are your own... unless your a real scruff this should not be necessary! There may be an initial outlay if you really do need to by some smart clothes but you shouldn't have to factor it into a monthly budget.

A girl shouldn't need expensive gifts either - in the early stages of a good relationship cheap yet significant ones are much more important (such as the cheap stuffed teddy won at the fair or the pretty shell picked up on a beach) If a girl expects to be showered with gifts and treats and moans if she doesn't get them I think she's probably a bit of a freeloader who would be better off with a sugar-daddy than a boyfriend. You should only have to budget for 4 important gifts a year - birthday, christmas, valentines and anniversary.

A decent girl won't mind if you can afford expensive dates all the time if you make up for it with time and attention so you can expect your phone and petrol budget to go up.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (1 September 2013):

eyeswideopen agony auntJust go looking buddy, it's like a box of chocolates, only you do have a choice you know. My only advice is to not go to Vegas and marry one on your first date.

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A female reader, janniepeg Canada +, writes (1 September 2013):

janniepeg agony auntWomen want to see you at least once a week. Dinner would be anywhere from $20 to $40. Movies $40. Events like concerts, 50$ to 100$ each ticket. Gas and parking $30. Gifts like roses, chocolate. $20.

As for clothes. I don't know. If I see something nice on you and ask you where you get them and then you say Walmart. I don't know what to think.

You are looking to spend $300-$500 a month. I think this is how women feels ideal. I would say a young woman like you can afford to look for a guy who can spend. But you can't believe how many women at age 40 are supporting their men.

You are getting this answer from a 32 year old woman who has concluded relationships are not worth my time. I had dined in expensive restaurants, I had also remember times we ate in Subway, sitting in a living room wondering when I would get out. I even got frozen dinners, Campbell soup and grillcheese for dinner.

I also had to spend on babysitting and nice clothes.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2013):

Honestly? The minute a girl knows she is just another line item in your budget she is going to run the other way.

I work full time and have never ASKED my BF to buy me anything... we split dates 50/50. That said, I'd rather pay for 100% of expenses with a guy who genuinely loved me than be spoiled by someone who decided the costs of having a GF were in fact offset by the benefits. With logic like yours you may as well go out and pay a prostitute. At least then you know exactly what the cost is and are assured of a return on your "investment"!

Good luck finding a nice woman who wants to be treated like a commodity.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (1 September 2013):

Honeypie agony auntI guess it depends on what MODEL of GF you wish to purchase.. The 1.0 doesn't require much maintenance, where as the 2.0 and 2.1 do....

Sorry Sarcasm just snuck in.

Why should you pay for her clothes? And why would it be on YOU to make a GF "look better"? Gift should be what birthday/Christmas/"anniversary".. but I don't see how you can BUDGET when you don't even KNOW the girl and her taste or how independent she is. I find it hilarious.

A GF is not a race-horse where you as a OWNER have to factor in costs of stabling, hay, feed, grooming, ect.

JEBUZ!

But if you NEED to budget in a GF I would say take her out 2-6 times a month for a movie, for dinner, for going to a exhibition, but if you date a girl who expect you to pay all I really can't help you, because I have never been one of those.

Good luck buying a GF...

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A female reader, shrodingerscat United States +, writes (1 September 2013):

shrodingerscat agony auntIt depends on what kind of girl you date, where you live, how independent she is and a million other factors.

You do end up spending more money when you are dating, but you act as if you expect that you're going to be paying for EVERYTHING for her. Unless you're independently wealthy and in search of a trophy girl, that's just not realistic.

We cannot tell you "how much" a girlfriend will cost, because there are too many unknowns.

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