Should I contact this girl again? Or is she just being nice?
Q. Hello, This is kind of a pathetic story, but I would appreciate any help. When I was in college senior year I spotted this beautiful girl that would routinely eat in the cafeteria around the time I was there. I sadly could never time exa...
A. 7 May 2012: Hi,
Thanks for the follow up. It really is helpful to get what happened. So, just remember it was simply because she didn't know you. Forget this one, delete and block and all that. Move on to new people. Keep doing what you are doing because you ... (read in full...)
To guys: why do you take so long to reply to a text a girl sends to you?
Q. me and this guy have been talking, and he mostly starts the conversation and it seems that he is interested in me and I am interested in him too. But why does it take him so long to reply when I text him? Guys why do you take long to reply back? ...
A. 7 January 2012: Hi,
yes, how long is long? 5 mins can seem ages if you are texting. Ty. ... (read in full...)
Me and my boyfriend just can't seem to have sex!
Q. i have tried to have sex twice with my boyfriend but every time, it really hurts and he makes me bleed. the first time we tried it, it didn't get very far in and i started bleeding. the second time which was two days ago he put it all the way in but ...
A. 7 January 2012: Hello,
From a male perspective, I would say that you have lost your virginity. I believe because things are new to you and strange, you are not quite relaxed yet and this makes you "smaller" down there while he is "normal" size. But, more prac... (read in full...)
Boyfriend cheating with S and M mistress?
Q. My boyfriend is into S and M (bondage) He doesn't want to do it with me because he thinks I'm only doing it to please him. Our sex is not great. He complains that he cant get into it because the S and M is what turns him on the most. He is meet...
A. 5 January 2012: Hello,
Oh dear this is cheating with permission. He will share very intimate stuff with a lady even if it is a "game." These games include all kinds of control scenarios with objects and clothes and fetish behaviour with shoes and worship. He did ... (read in full...)
Should I contact this girl again? Or is she just being nice?
Q. Hello, This is kind of a pathetic story, but I would appreciate any help. When I was in college senior year I spotted this beautiful girl that would routinely eat in the cafeteria around the time I was there. I sadly could never time exa...
A. 5 January 2012: Hello,
No, it seems a massive long shot to me and no contact has been kept up over the past months. Also, she hasn't initiated anything. However, for what it's worth, try the long shot and see if she would catch up. Nothing to lose at all. If you ... (read in full...)
How can I get over these feelings of frustration without cutting her out as a friend?
Q. alright, long question here: ok so about a year or so ago i had told this girl whom i had been really good friends with for about 2 years that i liked her as more than a friend and she was super cool about it but she told me that she liked someone ...
A. 4 January 2012: Hello,
you can't really get over these feelings because you have already tried and it don't work. I'm afraid you are going to have to cut and run. It is incredibly frustrating to be in your position wanting her and always knowing there will neve... (read in full...)
Real deal or is he blowing me off???
Q. Hello, I am talking to a guy who is 11 yrs oldcer than me who has been divorced and has kids. He is 36 and I am 25. He seems to be a really nice guy, and has a job in law enforcement which requires him to be on-call at all times. When we first ...
A. 1 January 2012: Hello,
When you told him you were not the type to do the comments on the texts he took a step back. This gave him a reality check and he may have realised that you were not compatible with him. Therefore, he has begun pulling away. Only my idea... (read in full...)
My ex is being pathetic by posting things about me on facebook!
Q. my ex has been posting things about me indirectly for a mth on facebook...when i asked him who is he referring to,he'd answered that it's towards his random friends who made him angry (actually i knew he was lying obviously)... here's sample ...
A. 1 January 2012: Yes, remove from Facebook. Go onto settings and use the block. thanks. ... (read in full...)
I love her she only wants friends. What to do?
Q. So I meet this lady online in late Oct. 2011,we meet for diner I texted a few times after but no instrest. So i emailed her and said guess there was no chemistry nice to meet you good luck. She emailed back we can be friends with her number again. I ...
A. 1 January 2012: Hello,
Yes, the advice below from Frank is what you need.
From personal experience, don't invest massive energy into a friends thing in the hope of something more. It really does deag you down and down and down.
Perhaps her previous hur... (read in full...)
What is it about men and blondes?
Q. Hi everyone this is a question for the men really but women feel free to answer to I was just wondering what is it men love about blonde hair on a woman why do men love it so much every man I know if I ask them what there favourite hair colour on a ...
A. 27 December 2011: Well, just my idea, it's sort of blonde hair is sort of youth and glamour and Marilyn Monroe and Doris Day if you see what I mean. You have the Barbie doll and the white/blonde color looks clean and pure. So although it is probably a powerful ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend uninterested? Busy? Done with me?
Q. I have been with my girl for about 7 months. We worked together when we met and had so much fun. After I left she started to text me and invite me over to her place and to do things I did the same all worked well. We didn't have sex for about two ...
A. 27 December 2011: Well, obviously the Christmas period is busy and all that blah blah. But she seems to have gone quiet on you. The "whats up" business didn't need her to respond how she did. I knew what you meant when I read it so why did she need to clarify things. ... (read in full...)
How many kisses x x x x is the right number of x x x x in an online message to someone I'm interested in?
Q. Hello just a quick question, how many x's do you think are suitable to put at the end of a text/ facebook message to the opposite sex? Without giving the wrong impression, or should i just put none at all. Sometimes my boyfriend gets jealous when i ...
A. 25 December 2011: I think none at all in this case. As an example, how do you feel if I sign off my post here to you like this? Tom xx
Does it seem ok? Or fine to you?
However, there are people I know that will always enclose a funny, :) x. It's their style. ... (read in full...)
We have sex a few times a week. He wants to be friends. So why does he want to keep all this secret?
Q. I met this guy who just moved here and we started talking. after one month we hooked up and had sex.i asked him if we're just friends an he replied saying obviously we are more than that...but he doesn't want people to know so I tried my best to hide...
A. 25 December 2011: Yes, i am afraid he is just using you in a way to get sex for a few times a week. I mean, nothing is encouraging when after a few months of this he says friends only. If he had the hots for you, he would want more. Seems its only sex I'm afraid. But ... (read in full...)
Why don't the question askers read their mail?
Q. Hello all, From time to time as a regular Aunt on this site, I receive messages in my mailbox from people needing a personal reply to their problems. I am more than happy to help if I can and I do reply to all messages with help or information w...
A. 20 October 2011: Thank you so far for your answers. I suppose because i take time to answer(24 hours/48 hours) and it takes a while to work out a good response, i feel frustrated that my reply is not read. But perhaps I've just encountered a number of people that ... (read in full...)
Had my first kiss with a guy I like then I find out his ex is having his baby....what should I do?
Q. This guy in my college class has been flirting with me for the past few weeks. He's 26, I'm 20. His flirting hasn't been inappropriate just some "You look beautiful" kind of flirting. Yesterday I decided to go for it and we went to his house to ...
A. 19 October 2011: Hi, You don't want this in your life. You are a young lady and you don't want the drama of dating a guy that has a baby with someone else and sees the baby every week etc. A mother that will be on the scene forever and a baby that he will be attac... (read in full...)
Why do people give up so easily? Why don't dumper's communicate until it's too late?
Q. My ex dumped me out of the blue. He said that I have no self confidence [not true] and I'm not assertive enough- that I'm a push over. So why did he wait until it was too late to tell me this? Why didn't he even tell me this sooner? Why didn't he ...
A. 19 October 2011: He wasn't interested in you changing. Simply because he wanted out. He probably got to a stage where he didn't want things to work out. ... (read in full...)
I slept with his friend after we broke up, now we're back together and he's upset about it.
Q. About 10 months ago my boyfriend and I of a year split up. It was a horrible split up and instead of dumping me he ignored me for a month until i gave up. A month later i met one of his friends on a night out and ended up going back to his and ...
A. 19 October 2011: I think you are both tired of this relationship now. He wont come to terms with it in a month of Sundays. You were ignored for a month so you took that as a break up. You weren;t with him and he wasn't with you. The friend thing wasn't a wise thing ... (read in full...)
I neeed HELP!!!!!! virgin about to make biggest mistake of his life!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Q. My friend is 19 and a virgin. We are both going to the same college. He met this girl at a school party and she gave him head over the weekend. She later asked how many gilrs he has been with and he said 0. Her roomate is leaving this week and she ...
A. 18 October 2011: Hi, You gotta let him go ahead. He is an adult and knows what he is doing. I appreciate your concern and your morals but it is his choice with this girl. She may be very experienced and perhaps she just wants the honour of taking him but it is hi... (read in full...)
What do you think, is it over? What would you do?
Q. Dear Cupid My question links on from this previous question... http://www.dearcupid.org/question/our-relationship-was-amazing-and-now-i-need.html Basically I gave my gf space for five days. Come Saturday I left her a voicemail saying I ho...
A. 18 October 2011: Hi,
You need to communicate. Ring her up and see what's happening. Might be difficult to speak at work so I'd say ring her tonite. ... (read in full...)
do guys even want to be in a casual relationship with a girl who doesn't want to offer him sex?
Q. i've recently starting hanging out with a guy who is in an open relationship with another girl. this works for me as i'm not interested in anything serious, i just enjoy the flirting and the company because we are both attracted to each other. the ...
A. 18 October 2011: I'd say he is hanging around just in case. He has nothing to lose as he has his sex with the open relationship girl already. So for him, it worth hanging around just in case. ... (read in full...)
Could he have food poisoning?
Q. Hi, my bf has been going to the bathroom every 5-10 mins. He has been cramping and every time he eats it's hurts his stomach and basically feels like he have to use the bathroom constantly. It's loose stool only a bit. It's been going on almost 2 ...
A. 18 October 2011: Doct doctor doctor. He needs to see a medical doctor. This site can't help with diagnosis on medical matters. He needs professional advice and an examination. Take care. ... (read in full...)
3,000 miles separating them, will their LDR work out?
Q. Okay my sister is 22 and her boyfriend is 23. They both graduated from college but her boyfriend moved to New York for a job and now he's living there. My sister is working at a hospital here in Seattle (working in a hospital is her dream job). They ...
A. 18 October 2011: In this case, the distance and jobs involved make this a big big problem. Also, the ages are young and I would just question how many times they would see eachother during the year. Hospital work has long infrequent hours so it is very hard to plan ... (read in full...)
Was this online girl for real?
Q. I started using Zoosk a couple of months ago, and contacted a few girls. One named Naomi replied to me, and we started to chat casually on email. She told me she wanted to exchange pictures, and although I regret it, I did send her some indecent ...
A. 18 October 2011: It's very hard to say. One thing is ask "what sort of genuine girl would do this after a couple of messages?" It all seems too good to be true. Further, be careful about sending your own stuff like this as whoever this Naomi was has now got your ... (read in full...)
How many men think sex isn't good unless a BJ in involved?
Q. How many of men consider that sex is not good without blowjob? Is intercourse alone not enough to satisfy a man? How many women would perform oral sex on a stable partner vs a casual sexual encounter?...
A. 18 October 2011: From my experience I have never been keen. I would always prefer intercourse or a hand job. I cant explain why but blow jobs have never been important to me. ... (read in full...)
She says she wants to be friends, doesn't want to lead me on
Q. I was recently with a girl. It took me a lot to get her, she has committment problems because of a past relationship. She tends to push people that make her happy away, like me. All was going well until she ignored me for a week. When she did talk ...
A. 18 October 2011: Hi,
No, you are going to have to let this girl go. You do not want to hang out and do all the stuff as a friend. You want the whole bf/gf situation. She doesn't want this so you need to accept it and stop contacting her. All the ignoring or goin... (read in full...)
I was his rebound girl....how do I get over this?
Q. I was his rebound girl. I cannot believe it. I definitely knew what I got myself into, but the god-damned feelings kicked in. I fell for him, quite a bit. I wanted more, and I thought I could do it. The honest words he said, does hurt....
A. 17 October 2011: Hi,
From personal experience I was a girl's rebound. We met up on a dating site and I thought I'd won the "competition."
Things went so so good for nearly 3 months, loving, soul mate, chat, friendship, her friends, my friends, attraction, days out... (read in full...)
Any tips please on how to get him back? I love him and want him back. he's been depressed.
Q. My boyfriend of 3 years dumped me 6 months ago and I am still not over it. We still talk now but online and I miss him like you wouldnt believe. He dumped me because he had became depressed as he had no idea what he was doing with his life an...
A. 16 October 2011: I'm afraid he has moved along with his life. He doesn't want a relationship and life and career are going well. He may have been depressed about his life before but now seems he has got through it. Sadly, he got through it without you and perhaps ... (read in full...)
I h ave given up everything for him and he cannot give anything back. Do I cut my losses?
Q. hi aunts and uncles, hope you can shed some lignt on my situation please. I met my partner 4 years ago, it was long distant at first but i moved in with him 2 years ago, left all my family and friends cause i wanted to be with him, he has children...
A. 16 October 2011: You have given up a lot and are not happy. Things are not smooth with him. You are mainly alone in the house all week and this is no life for you. Also, you are suffering for his own mistakes with his E~x. Although, the hefty pay out business is ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend is not virgin! How do I forgive her?
Q. i have a relation with a girl since march 2011. after 2 months when she come to know that i love her, she told me that she is not virgin. she cried the whole night and told me that she was force by her ex-boyfriend when she was having a severe ...
A. 13 October 2011: I would suggest that if you are looking for a virgin girl, then this is not the girl for you. If you feel you cannot come to terms with things how they are then you must leave her. ... (read in full...)
He doesn't want a relationship but said he doesn't want me talking to other men, what is that all about?
Q. Im so confuse the guy that im be have sex with that said he didnt want a realationship just told me that i cant talk 2 any other men what all that about i was talk to him and his workmate that is my bestfriend ...
A. 12 October 2011: He just wants regular sex for nothing. He doesn't care at all about you. He just wants to protect his getting sex when he feels like it. ... (read in full...)
I know I don't have much of a chance but is there anything I can do to win her over?
Q. I am deeply in love with her for past 2 years,i proposed her many times like a jerk that was a mistake i made, now not in contact with her for 3 months,she's least interested in talking to me and she finds me irritating,i am still in love with her, ...
A. 12 October 2011: Hello,
You have no chance at all. She may view your communication as unwelcome and you may in fact be harrassing her. I suggest to stop all the communication and move on. ... (read in full...)
Is it unreasonable that I'd like sex with her every so often? She's stopped all sex now she is a Christian
Q. Dear cupid, I am in a relationship with this amazing girl and have been for over a 18 months, when we first dated we were having sex twice a week. This carried on until about 12 months later when she asked if we can stop having sex as she is a ...
A. 11 October 2011: She has obviously committed deeper into the Christian religion. Part of the teaching is to to keep intercourse inside of marriage. Therefore, sex outside marriage is not prescribed. That's her faith, that's her belief. You will have to go along with ... (read in full...)
It was nothing serious and he blew it out of proportion
Q. My partner caught me flirting on line. He had warned me several times to stop. I did for a while. He called round unexpectedly while i was in some erotic conversation. He has been a good father figure to my two teenage sons. After getting abusive he ...
A. 11 October 2011: You were in the wrong. This must be understood first. You need to accept responsibility for your actions. Please understand that your partner has lost trust in you. You were asked to stop but you continued. That's why he went mad and left. ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for sex to feel different with/without a condom?
Q. dear cupid, soo, the first few times that i had sex, the guy used a condom. buuut there were a few times after that when he DIDN'T use a condom. please don't start lecturing me about how this is risky behavior and that i could wind up getting ...
A. 11 October 2011: Yes, from personal experience without is much better. Feels more sensitive and feels great to finish. Also it feels more intimate being without.
(I say this purely because you said about knowing about condoms etc etc. )... (read in full...)
How can I ask to stay over without being rude?
Q. I've been invited to a night out in November for my friend's birthday.She recently moved in with her boyfriend in a city that i havent been to that much so i'm not used to the area and its about 40 minutes away from where i live.i might have to ...
A. 10 October 2011: I believe you should just be straight forward about this. Just say you are looking forward to coming but concerned about getting home late afterwards and could she please help on this occasion. I think "people" in general are aware of the worries of ... (read in full...)
Married. Almost a father. But I love him! Help!
Q. I have a problem and I can't tell anyone I know. I'm 36, I've been single for most of my life and have always held a torch for a man I met at University. We recently ran into eachother on the work circuit and all these feelings I've had bottle u...
A. 10 October 2011: Hello,
I am afraid you are going to have to walk away. However hard it is for you, you must walk away. He has a wife and she is expecting his baby and she needs him to take care of her. She has hopes and she relies on him. You are going to have... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is taller than me, and I don't know how to kiss him!
Q. Ok so i'm 13, never had my first kiss, but i have a boyfriend in 8th (i'm in 7th). We have been together for like 2 days but i know the kiss is coming sooner or later (dont judge). I'm a shortie 4'9" and he's 5'8" big diffrence to me. To get the ...
A. 6 October 2011: You could get a wooden crate to stand on or a box? But seriously, he will naturally bend slightly and you will both find your correct position. It will work.... (read in full...)
She contacts me all the time. I ignore her. I am heartbroken. How do I move on? How do I forget her?
Q. I Just recently broke up with the love of my life. We broke up about a month ago. I cant stop thinking about her. I want to so badly. I broke her heart and i want to forget her. I cant. I thought maybe I can get her back, But i realized the...
A. 6 October 2011: Hi, If there is no chance of a relationship then you are right about the friend's business. Don't bother with that one. You will spend months and months of hoping and be stuck in limbo. So, firstly don't let hate come into it. This is not good. Si... (read in full...)
I am flattered but is it too early for him to be saying all these things? We've been dating 7 weeks....
Q. I have been dating a guy for about 7 weeks now. things have been really good and we get on so well. He works away mon-fri after getting a job promotion and is doing really well. He told me about his childhood and how traumatic it was.. His mum was ...
A. 5 October 2011: Hi, This is very early on isn't it? I worry that his speed and racing ahead reeks of desperation. It also spoils the mystery, the romance, the uncertainty, the element of.....Surprise!! For you, well you have to go with what you feel but for me,... (read in full...)
Am I being a doormat for her ex?
Q. Here is my agony. I was in a long-term relationship with my partner for six years, when I met a girl online that I developed a great friendship with, after about 15 months of corresponding daily we started developing feelings for one another. These ...
A. 5 October 2011: Hello, I have read your situation and my impression is that she is having an affair with you. I don't know why, but I just get the feeling that she has no intention of breaking up with her partner Nor, that her partner has any idea that their r... (read in full...)
Is he falling for me again? Or does he not reply because he feels guilty because he's married now or does he have some other agenda?
Q. My ex and I were together for over 10 years There was a bad breakup. He wouldn't talk to me for a long time. He married after a short time. Now I started to contact him because we bumped into each other and it made my heart race again. He takes my...
A. 5 October 2011: It seems as if he is being polite to contact you. He is married so will not call or email you because he obviously wants to be with his wife. ... (read in full...)
Guys -- looks or personality?
Q. Hello all I have a question for the guys out there. Would you rather have a super hot woman with a pretty face and nice bod but dumb and needy. OR Would you rather have a sweetheart with a kind and generous heart but average looks and weight. ...
A. 4 October 2011: Personality every time. Looks do fade and attractive with bad personality is ugly. However, average looks with bad personality is also ugly in that sense. So, I'd look for the chemistry, the easy going type. But people are all types so attractive ... (read in full...)
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