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... Send *lderthandirt a private message | | | *lderthandirt's profile:I don't know about qualifactions or not but I do know I'm older than most of the folks that offer up questions and I have shared a lot of experiences that the folks seem to be zeroed in on. 46 years of marriage yes to the same woman. i've lived in Hawaii,California, Texas(currently in Texas) worked in Louisiana, New Jersey, Arkansas,Texas, and Indiana on a consulting engineering basis. I love to daydream about stuff[like living o a beach somewhere living off the sea, I lkie to write lyrics for proposed songs,like reading. I surf the net a lot. |
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Ever since boyfriend showed me naked photos of him and his ex girlfriends things have changed
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 5 months now and things started out beautiful but that something beautiful is dying now. We met through an social network dating site and when we first decided to meet up, I was reluctant and scared, but I went ...
A. 25 September 2014: He sounds like the winner of jerk-of-the year. If I were you, I'd find a real man,not one that is soin love with his naked bodythat he needs for all to see it.How'd you get mixed up with this loser?... (read in full...)
Ex boyfriend's pervy behavior makes me question a reconciliation
Q. My ex and I were together for many years. We've been broken up for quite awhile due to various reasons and I've been moving on fairly alright. We're no longer friends on facebook but can see certain recent activity, if we check, and we both do as ...
A. 24 September 2014: You have every right to see his fancinations as 'pervy' but to most it's normal.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend lies and tells me he doesn't watch porn. My self esteem is at an all time low
Q. Me and my partner have regular and amazing sex, we experiment and I have sexy outfits aswell n rolplay......I found out afew months ago he watches porn, I hate the stuff and I've had a lot of bad relationships becuz of it.....he knows how I feeling ...
A. 24 September 2014: I never will understand how women take it so personally when a guy looks at porn. Te is no 'substitution at play, Men aren't wishing they were with that girls or woman. It's a whole lot mor complexthan that. Get over yourself, he doen't love you any ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid of getting hurt so I act strangely and then wind up alone!
Q. Hi im in a bit of a pickle, I've been single nearly 3 years, im a single mum,have been on a lot of dates in the past but never really met anyone I click with, altho I did meet someone at one point we dated became an item quickly but I totally ruined ...
A. 24 September 2014: You have an irrational fear that needs further investigation by a proffesional. Go see one!... (read in full...)
I'm scared to commit to my boyfriend
Q. I love my boyfriend, dearly. I pounce on the phone whenever he texts or calls me (we do not live together and live in different cities) and could talk to him all day if I could. I'm alway eager to text him, my parents know about him, etc etc. We've ...
A. 24 September 2014: You ought to be scared. If his parents are that wierd he ill be too someday(we all become our parent someday or s it seems) I don't recomend youstay in love with him 'dearly'Facebook again rears its ugly head o how not to have a relationship. When ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't my boyfriend want sex more often?
Q. When I first met my boyfriend it was in a "business only" relationship. At that time he was in a "bad relationship", that was pretty much sexless, that took him three years to finally get out of. When I first met him I liked him very much as a ...
A. 24 September 2014: Where we you 20 years go? Flip that entire scene upside down and you'll see what a lot of men my age feel about their wives(we ask it all the time where did my wife go?)At about age 50, we men begin to falter in our drive(low T,BHP, all kinds of ... (read in full...)
Fifth Date and then He Disappeared.
Q. I have been dating this guy for about a month. We have a bunch of mutual friends and he knows my sister. We don't text often, mostly just to make plans and then he calls me the day before or day of to finalize. Majority of the time he would text me ...
A. 24 September 2014: What you think is "cute" probably wasn't taken by him as cute. Sounds like he's just not into you. forget it happened and move on.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is never horny anymore!
Q. so ive been dating this girl for 2 years things are going okay besides the fact that we argue so much and she is very immature at times .. But anyways i really been stressing because we've always had sex every single day almost multiple times aday ...
A. 24 September 2014: Oh, you poor puppy. Girls don't always live up to our fantasy. That is life. You are obligated to go when she says go. period.... (read in full...)
My FWB guy said I love you..was it just post sex emotion?
Q. 4 years ago I had a brief fling with a guy. It didn't work out but it was good while it lasted. About 6 months ago we bumped into each other after a night out and exchanged numbers. Since then we've had a fwb situation going on. We spoke about it ...
A. 24 September 2014: CindyCares hasit correct.... (read in full...)
Should I make a move on my friend's brother?
Q. Hi all, I posted a question about my friend's brother not too long ago. In summary, I am a sophomore in college, he is a senior at my school, I am very good friends with his sister who is also a sophomore, and I have been interested in him for abou...
A. 24 September 2014: Go for it! Thes types of encounters don't come along everyday. Who knows you two might be neant for each other.GooLuck... (read in full...)
Ex boyfriend's pervy behavior makes me question a reconciliation
Q. My ex and I were together for many years. We've been broken up for quite awhile due to various reasons and I've been moving on fairly alright. We're no longer friends on facebook but can see certain recent activity, if we check, and we both do as ...
A. 24 September 2014: Andhere we have yet anther good reason to stay away from fb.No one can have any privacy without someone "investigating"(snooping) and then getting all judgemental about it. My suggestion would be to leave him alone, youtwo are not an 'item' so what ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my fiance and my friend that I've fallen for his girlfriend?
Q. I have been feeling ill with a current situation I have got myself into. I have been previously married which ended after she had an affair and got pregnant. I eventually found my current partner. I have a close friend whom I have known all my life. ...
A. 24 September 2014: Yu said it! What a mess you have gotten yourself into. The only way out that I see is to run like the wind away from the whole sordid mess. Good Luck... (read in full...)
Ever since boyfriend showed me naked photos of him and his ex girlfriends things have changed
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 5 months now and things started out beautiful but that something beautiful is dying now. We met through an social network dating site and when we first decided to meet up, I was reluctant and scared, but I went ...
A. 24 September 2014: Your bf(?) is a little bit stupid and a whole lot narsasistic. Anyone that wants naked pics of him or her self taken and 'posted' is more in love with themselves than anyone else. The best thing for you to do in my humble opinion is find a new bf.... (read in full...)
I'm not entirely sold on us "getting back together"
Q. I was in a "relationship" (with no labels) with this guy for about a year and 10 months. Last month, things ended when I got really angry and went off on him about all the grievances I'd felt throughout the relationship and especially this summer. ...
A. 24 September 2014: Ithink it sounds liike two people trying to ride a tricycle. it can be done but it's just too hard to coordinate so to heck with it, And, i think you sound like you're try to talk yourself into doing something really stupid just to placate the ... (read in full...)
She spends a lot of time with her ex boyfriend but tells me I'm still her 'one and only'
Q. Hello, I've been dating this girl for 6 months now. It all started when I needed help with getting the size for my suit from the girl I like, because I was ordering for Valentine's Day because I promised my friend, Adele, (who is straight but I w...
A. 23 September 2014: You can start by realizng you were played for a _____. that ought to elicit some negative feelings about her(the more the better) Then you can write down all the details of this encounter and reread them befor commiting to yet another gal.... (read in full...)
Dating is difficult because I'm too picky and lose interest too quickly
Q. I seem to find dating rather difficult as I tend to be rather picky and not find connections with ppl straight away and I am finding it hard to get a partner. I have only been out on like 1 date a year for the past 3 years, and out of them 2 of...
A. 23 September 2014: I've ot an idea tht might pove benficial; Takea class like The Power of Psitive Thking, Sign upfor a dancclass, etc. Anything that getys you close to a variety of females like a night school class. I think you just need to be among the women to wor ... (read in full...)
Was it a bet? Or was he genuine?
Q. Met a guy on a train, he asked to share my seat, there were plenty of others spare. We talked he asked questions about my journey,job blah blah had a laugh, he asked if I wanted to go for a drink. He lived too far away, so I said no. He got o...
A. 23 September 2014: He was making an attempt to be 'grown up' ut it looks like itell flat.... (read in full...)
I want her to reconsider just being friends
Q. Me and this girl were in a relationship at the end of last year and she ended it because she didn't think we were right for each other and also because she needed to sort her head out. Last week she wanted to give it another go saying how she made...
A. 23 September 2014: You are stuck in indecision, this relationship is not going to be a normal one why not just forget about it?... (read in full...)
My boyfriend prefers time spent with friends over time spent with me
Q. Ok so me and my bf have been dating for almost 3 years and we are both the same age, 23. Lately I have been stressing to him the importance of him establishing a "career" because he is about to turn 24 in a couple of months and I do want better for ...
A. 23 September 2014: I sense that he as entered or is entering a stage of depression. You may suggest proffesional help butat this point he will probably jus deny theroblem. Keep watch over him, if is depression, it can go south on you both pretty quick[no I'm not a ... (read in full...)
The Guy I Like Has A Girlfriend :( How To Get Over Him?
Q. So, yeah, I'm 21 and recently met this guy who's in his mid-thirties through a friend. I really liked him (though we're just acquaintances), but I just heard my friend mention his girlfriend in conversation with someone else. This always, ALWAYS ...
A. 23 September 2014: As cold and 'unfeeling' as this might sound, it is truth; You never had a chance with some guy that's already taken so just tell yourself, "Get over yourself,self!" Start your adventure all over, day one,hour one, GO, now get out of your pity pool ... (read in full...)
I was going to break up with him but then I fell for him again
Q. Dear Cupid I have an on and off relationship with my bf for past 4 years. He always verbally abuses me, belittles me, ignores me for long period of time, make sure my esteem always stays all time low.... Coming to the current happenings, he wa...
A. 23 September 2014: Dump anyone that is verbally abusive 'cause the next step on the abuse ladder is physical abuse.git while the gittn is good.... (read in full...)
She likes romance -- what about this idea?
Q. I have an idea I would like some feedback for? This girl I like likes romance a lot so I have been thinking of a way to just do that. I thought about leaving notes around school in places that I know she will look. I'm shy but I can get over that if ...
A. 23 September 2014: A better idea might be to write some poetry.(No it doesn't have to rhyme.(not roses are red...) some personal stuff you know.... (read in full...)
I came on too strong and scared him off -- any way I can fix this?
Q. A little over a month ago I met a guy and we went on 3 dates. The first 2 dates went amazing and I really felt a connection but on the third date I slept at his place and things got a bit awkward, I kind of came on too strong, asking too many ...
A. 23 September 2014: Nope, he's gone...let it be,let it be(as the song goes).Lesson learned; most guys don't want to plan for the future... (read in full...)
Is this an addiction of some kind?
Q. I am an average 15 year old freshman in high school, with a regular range of problems. But we've all been in that position. Although I've noticed something a bit different. I absolutely LOVE the music I listen to (techno/electron...
A. 23 September 2014: Sounds more like you're just a typical teenager trying to get away with breaking the rules without getting caught. Deep breaths, you're there to learn how to function in this world not get away with breaking the rules.Buckle down now so you'll be ... (read in full...)
I want to be with my best friend but she doesn't know that I am bi
Q. I am a 16 year old girl. I like my best friend in the I want to be with her way. She is openly bi but doesn't know I am. What should I do?? I really need some advice!...
A. 22 September 2014: If she is openly bi(I have no idea how that works) then you should be able to just walk up and ask her "What's it like to be bisexual?" That ought to start a discussion whereupon you can just jump in and say you feel the same way. Whoopie!... (read in full...)
My boyfriend lies and tells me he doesn't watch porn. My self esteem is at an all time low
Q. Me and my partner have regular and amazing sex, we experiment and I have sexy outfits aswell n rolplay......I found out afew months ago he watches porn, I hate the stuff and I've had a lot of bad relationships becuz of it.....he knows how I feeling ...
A. 22 September 2014: Because he'san idiot, short and sweet but true. Find a new bf, this on is a dud.... (read in full...)
Marriage and threesomes..need advice!
Q. I need your opinion. My wife and I have been married for almost 5 years. I have always wanted to try anal and never have with any woman. I have always had this fantasy and had played with her asshole before which she loved, but the last time we ...
A. 22 September 2014: Do not open that door! It'll lead to bad things. You can't do it. you can fantisize about it but do get involved. It will ruin the marraige and you will be sorry.... (read in full...)
I'm really hurting after getting a break up text. I don't know how to deal with it!
Q. I was just broken up with over a text message from this guy who I was dating for close to 3 months and we had spent 24/7 together. Over the course of these three months we had gotten really close and he said he had never had a gf that was as carin...
A. 22 September 2014: Good grief What a moron..breakups are hard enough as they are without having to get a damned text to seal the deal, no class whatsoever. I remember back when I got the phone call from my gf to tell me her dad had "suggested" we no longer see one ... (read in full...)
Do many people have one night stands?
Q. I am single 29 years old now. 3 years ago, i joined filipinocupid site because of curiosity. I uploaded my photo and i got many interest from different men so it excites me and started exchanging messages to those guys i got interest with. After 3 ...
A. 22 September 2014: The term 'one night stand' and the term 'friends with benifits" were obviously invented by a man. We(they) are interested in bedding their date as soon as possible to see if they will enjoy their company again. You don't have to DO anything you ... (read in full...)
Surely after 5 years he should be able to give me more than 'maybe one day'?
Q. I'm looking for some advice please. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years now, but the last few months have been a bit rocky in my opinion. I say in my opinion, because he disagrees and thinks I'm overreacting about the fact that he still can't ...
A. 22 September 2014: If you can afford to buy a house at your "ripe old age" you should do it, regardless of what ANYONE has to say about it. Jelousy comes in all forms. Sounds like he wishes he was as comprtant as you seem to be and is kinda acting out. Go for it! You ... (read in full...)
I wanted a relationship, but he wouldn't commit! Should I have waited longer?
Q. I wasn't expecting or looking to find anyone as I had got out of a serious relationship at the start of the year, but in July I met this guy through a friend. We just instantly hit it off, and we swapped numbers etc. Since the first day I met I ha...
A. 21 September 2014: Yut the best laid plans of mce and men. no, I don't either. It just sounds like this was not meant to be. either on of you were "ready" for a prolonged relationship. Life goes on. No worries, just keep looking.... (read in full...)
I think I need to leave him, but I also want him to see that he's wrong about me!
Q. Ive written here before, and I know I think I am looking for an answer that doesn't exist. I've been with a man for over 3 1/2 years. We got engaged last year and broke off the engagement about 6 weeks before the wedding. Every time I get upse...
A. 21 September 2014: You don't need to let him know anything. Sounds like he knows everything anyway. Why try to 'fix' him? You can't fix stupid. Just go!... (read in full...)
I enjoy my life but want to feel important to someone else
Q. I'm confused about why I want things/ people in my life... I have a group of friends who are quite loud and chatty and funny. I'm fairly quiet. If I speak up in the group - nobody hears me, and nobody ever responds to me. When we use Whatsapp to ...
A. 21 September 2014: It sounds tome that you are reffering to the equivlant to 'chat rooms' in social media or Facebook. If that's the case. It's probably got nothing to do with you per se. A lot of people don't respond because they just get tired of the whole ... (read in full...)
My best friend treats me differently now that he's in a serious relationship!
Q. Hi , I've been friends with this guy forever and now we're bestfriends.he always wanted a relationship with me but I refused cause I didn't want to ruin our friendship, now he hav found this girl who is serious about him, he starts treating me ...
A. 21 September 2014: This is confusing to me(yeah, I know,guys don't understand this stuff)You thought a 'relationship' would ruin your friendship? If I wasn't friends with my wife I couldn't have a 'relationship. Goes against logic. He's either being spitefull to rub ... (read in full...)
Does he really want a teacher or me?
Q. I met this guy at my campus library and were talking about the different volunteer programmes we're both involved in. We are now on facebook and have been talking on and off (cause I've been busy) for the last 3 days. He then mentions that hes been ...
A. 21 September 2014: My 'take' on this guy is he's not real savey on the old "hint-hint' thing and that can have a double meaning. I think he just wants a teacher and you may be trying to read something else into it. Lots of luck.... (read in full...)
We talked a little. what next? Shall I wait? Or take the initiative and contact him?
Q. Hello, I talked to a guy once a little and then I added him on facebook. He accepted my friend request and also he liked my profile photo. Later I also liked his profile photo. What next? shall I chat with him on fb when I see that he is onli...
A. 21 September 2014: OMG! Another facebook dilema. Who'd a thunk it. Youn lady go find a real person to talko face-to-face and forget this FB nonsense it only leds to more dilemas just like this one. I never!... (read in full...)
Have a Mega crush on him. How can I get over him, and talk to him in a mature way?
Q. I'm just going to put this out there straight away - I'm 15 and the guy I am hopelessly head over heels in love with is 22. I think about him all the time, he's the hottest guy I've ever seen and I don't know what to do. He's totally out of my le...
A. 21 September 2014: Not going to work out,age difference is way too great, gotta move on kiddo, sorry...you can thank us all later in life.... (read in full...)
The ex: should I be concerned that I have been told that I am not "good in bed" ?
Q. Dear Aunts, My worst fear has come true. I was told I was bad in bed he said I'm not freaky enough. I like romantic slow passionte sex he likes rough play. I feel like I cant do the things he wants so the connection is fading away in other dept ...
A. 21 September 2014: Yeah, so what if you're not good in bed, who cares?Millionsof your peers would fit into that catagory so forget it. Ain't no big thing.... (read in full...)
Am a making a bad choice in marrying this man? We do fight constantly. He can be controlling.
Q. My fiancé and I have been fighting constantly about everything but our last fight earlier today made me question if I'm making the right choice to marry him. I guess I'm looking for an outsiders view as to weather or not I should continue to purs...
A. 21 September 2014: My answer is ...YES! you're making an error in judgement that could plauge you forever...don't do it... (read in full...)
What does it mean if she never initiates contact?
Q. Hey everyone I need some advice as to what's going on. I've recently started hanging out with an old friend about 2 months ago and I recently asked her out on a date about 2 weeks ago. I let her know I was interested . She said yes and I belive the ...
A. 20 September 2014: Back in 'the day, the girl never initiated contact. It was always the guy, Perhaps she's just a little old fashioned that way. ain't no big thing.... (read in full...)
Should end our relationship now, or try one more time to save it? She doesn't want children.
Q. My partner and I have been together almost 4 years. However our sex life has been non existent for about a year now. I've tried talking to her about it but nothing ever really comes of this. I know sex isn't everything in a relationship, but it is a...
A. 20 September 2014: These types of things ned to be ferrted out before you get married. Now it's too late so you have to file for a divorce. Better luck next time.... (read in full...)
Which one of these places is more likely to be my g spot?
Q. I've been trying to find my g spot for years. I'm aware that the g spot is not a magical button and it takes practice but I'm willing to be patient! When I lie on my back and enter in my fingers i have found TWO areas which feel a bit different from ...
A. 19 September 2014: Try searchingYoutube, they have a bunch of 'how to' vlogs on the subject.... (read in full...)
Tips for first time oral sex?
Q. hey ladieas i wanna favour from you..me and my gf are planning to go for oral for the first time..please tell me what caution should i take and how i could make this more pleasurable for my gf.....
A. 19 September 2014: I know I don't qualify, but I just have to wonder aloud, who makes plans for this? In my world it just happens and both parties know exactly what to do and how to do it. I am so out of the loop!... (read in full...)
My Russian wife has been watching Russian tv and I think she has become brainwashed?
Q. My wife left Russia some thirty years ago and travelled the world. She was a great conversationalist and worldly wise. Then she discovered Russia Television ( RT )on our TV. Now she watches it for most of the day and seems to be becoming brain ...
A. 19 September 2014: Look, Apparently, the russian propaganda machine has nough to say and is strongenough toave millions of faithfull citizens following blindly into what they think is a world f great peace and contentment otherwise the governmnt would have had ... (read in full...)
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