How can I help my family to cope with my cousin's cancer?
Q. HI Aunts and Uncles I've just had a close cousin diagnosed with advanced liver cancer. He is only 46 and we are all pretty devastated about this diagnosis. His father (my uncle) died 3 years ago from complications with his lungs. His death hi...
A. 5 October 2010: Hi Tisha and Denimandlace
Thank you both so much for your replies it really helps to talk about it with other people apart from your family. The funeral is tomorrow (Thursday the 7th Oct) so it will be a very sad day. I was talking to one of his ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend abroad, afraid she loves it more than she loves me
Q. So my girlfriend and I have been together for about 13 months now. We're both in our 3rd year of college. We met our freshman year during the 2nd semester and became quick friends, which is very unusual for me. I struggle with generalized anxiety ...
A. 5 October 2010: I can totally understand what she means when she says she wants to come back but she doesn't want to leave. I always feel like that when I go away. You look forward to getting back to the people you love and getting back to your normal life but ... (read in full...)
Would you forgive me for the way I'm treating him?
Q. I think one of my guy friends likes me and I don't like him back but I did a really really mean thing and I feel really bad especially since i think he thinks I like him back. Basically when I found out that he probebly likes me I happen to forget a ...
A. 4 October 2010: I'm sure the pain will wear off eventually and you will be friends again but sorry babe I don't think it will ever be the same as it was again. ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend abroad, afraid she loves it more than she loves me
Q. So my girlfriend and I have been together for about 13 months now. We're both in our 3rd year of college. We met our freshman year during the 2nd semester and became quick friends, which is very unusual for me. I struggle with generalized anxiety ...
A. 4 October 2010: I guess being realistic she is going to come back different since she has added to her knowledge of the world and seen new and different things and met lots of different people. But in her heart of hearts she will still be the same person you know ... (read in full...)
Newly separated and it's killing me
Q. We're 20, have been together for more than 6 months, and I moved 1000 miles away. We knew almost since we started dating that this day would come, but I haven't imagined we would mean this much to me. It's KILLING me, we separated only 5 days ago, ...
A. 4 October 2010: Long distance can work but it's hard work. The key is to have things to look forward to all the time. You need to plan trips to see each other at least every 6 months (more if possible) and stick to it. Do you have to be where you are to study or ... (read in full...)
How can I help my family to cope with my cousin's cancer?
Q. HI Aunts and Uncles I've just had a close cousin diagnosed with advanced liver cancer. He is only 46 and we are all pretty devastated about this diagnosis. His father (my uncle) died 3 years ago from complications with his lungs. His death hi...
A. 4 October 2010: Just thought I'd let you guys know that my cousin died yesterday. Can't believe that in July we thought he had gallstones and now he's dead. Life is such a fragile thing. I'm glad he's no longer suffering but oh what a terrible thing for us all. ... (read in full...)
My gut feeling tells me something isn't right here..is he gay?
Q. Oh goodness me! I really hope someone is listening out there!! I've been seeing a man for 6 months and I'm getting concerned that he may be gay. He has a premature ejaculation problem - he can only be inside me for less than a minute before he...
A. 3 October 2010: He kind of sounds like he might have OCD. Maybe the PE thing is because he hates mess and wants to get it all over and done with as quickly as possible.... (read in full...)
My gut feeling tells me something isn't right here..is he gay?
Q. Oh goodness me! I really hope someone is listening out there!! I've been seeing a man for 6 months and I'm getting concerned that he may be gay. He has a premature ejaculation problem - he can only be inside me for less than a minute before he...
A. 2 October 2010: PE doesn't necessarily mean he's gay and he very well could be stressed out from your feelings about it at the start. Honestly I think he would benefit from some sex therapy.... (read in full...)
My lack of experience affects my dating life, badly! Help!
Q. ok. so here is another friday night poster. i dont know where to start and i apologise for the length of the post. im approaching 30 and still a virgin. never date, dont approach girls when im out etc. i do go out plenty but always seem to g...
A. 2 October 2010: Pesonally I think bars and clubs are crappy places to meet partners. I'm a fan of joining some special interest groups, e.g book clubs, woodwork classes, pottery classes, cooking classes etc. Join something you are interested in and then you are ... (read in full...)
Falling for my guy friend..but having sex with him will really hurt my bf! Help!
Q. I've been in a relationship for the past 6 years! The first 3 years of our relationship i was fitting for our relationship he treated me like crap but now things are really good, I'm young but i do love my boyfriend he is living a couple thousand ...
A. 2 October 2010: Don't go there. Either break up with your boyfriend and pursue the friend or tell the friend you are a no go zone for sex. Cheating on your BF will creat BIG BIG problems for you.... (read in full...)
He's verbally attacks me but blanks out when I confront him about what he does! Any advice on why he does this?
Q. I am married to a strong-minded, controlling man. He will throw temper tantrums to get his way and to silence me when I try to speak up for myself. He has verbally attacked me many times with put downs,dtreating me like I am stupid. I have mentioned ...
A. 2 October 2010: Could he have multiple personality disorder? Does he seem like someone different when he verbally attacks you? You could try setting up a hidden video camera and catching his behaviour on tape so you can confront him with the hard evidence.... (read in full...)
Should I be concerned that she dreams of her exes, so much?
Q. My wife of three months keeps informing me of dreams she is having of ex's. I would say in an average week she dreams of them five or six times. They vary in content; some are sexual, some are not. First off, why is she telling me about these drea...
A. 2 October 2010: My ex was killed in a plane crash and after he died I dreamed about him a lot. We had been apart for about 6 years when he was killed and before it happened I had never dreamt about him but afterwards it was nearly every night. Like your wife some ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't understand!
Q. I am desperately in need of help. I am currently 17 weeks pregnant and live with my boyfriend of over a year. We have not been doing well in our relationship and we fight daily. I am emotional and hormonal and am sure that contributes to some of the ...
A. 30 September 2010: Are you seeing a midwife or doctor? I would talk to them about your mood swings they may be able to help.... (read in full...)
Should we see a relationship counselor or should I not even bother?
Q. Hello, My boyfriend (or ex, I don't know) says that he doesn't want to be together anymore because a lot of things about me annoy him. However, he is willing to pay to see a relationship councellor (which I am not). Why does he want to see one ...
A. 30 September 2010: Definately not. If you are at the apathetic stage there is no point trying to patch this up. Move on and find your true love.
All the best.... (read in full...)
13 and pregnant
Q. I am pregnant im am 13 my boyfriend is 14 we have been together for almost a year now I love him so so much but i have no idea how to tell my mom and their is no way to tell my dad trust me...I just need to know im not alone and i need advise on how ...
A. 30 September 2010: Mothers have unlimited capacity for loving their children so she will still love you through this. She may be angry and dissappointed but she will still love you and she will support your through it. I would suggest asking to go out with her for ... (read in full...)
I'm attracted to men, but don't want to be!
Q. I really hope i dont offend any one so I appologies if I do. I am 38 years old and always had some sexual attraction to men. Its always been just sexual never wanted to date anyone that is. I dont want to be gay and in my family life it would not be ...
A. 30 September 2010: Are you sexually attracted to girls too? Because if so then you could be bisexual. I don't really know what to say in terms of advice because you can't really "turn off" the sexual signals your brain gives you it's hardwired in. Honestly I think ... (read in full...)
How can I stop feeling paranoid about my relationship?
Q. Well first i will tell you exactly what my problem is and explain it in detail. Any girl i get really attached to after about a month or 2 months i get paranoid that they are going to dump me. So basically 4 years ago i dated this girl, and after ...
A. 30 September 2010: This is a hard thing to stop yourself doing and you may need to seek help with it by means of a qualified therapist. Basically you need to keep telling yourself to chill out and try to live each day as it comes instead of worrying about what will ... (read in full...)
I feel like my wife lied to me about having an STD, how should I bring it up?
Q. My wife of 4 years returned from her pap smear with irregular cells. This in itself is terrifying. We found out they weren't cancer, so that was a huge relief. My question: when my wife told me she had the irregular cells, she then said, "I to...
A. 30 September 2010: Honestly I think this is just a miscommunication rather than her outright lying to you about it. I think she truly thought she had told you when she told you she had an STD. By the way if your partner comes with an STD HPV is the one you want as ... (read in full...)
I think my very conservative mother found my vibrator!
Q. Hi everyone! I used to live with my extremely conservative mother, but last year I decided to move to my mother's empty loft. She agreed because the alternative was to live farther to where she lives and we like spending time together every other da...
A. 30 September 2010: I would imagine sex has been a taboo subject for your Mum because she is not comfortable with her body and the pleasure it can bring her. She has probably never known how to talk to you about it because of her own discomfort. If I were in your ... (read in full...)
What do women really, actually want?
Q. Why do women so often say they want things that aren't the man himself, e.g. clothes, tatoos, car, house, money, job, hairstyle? If you ask a man what he really wants, he wants a good looking, healthy woman who doesn't actually need makeup, or ...
A. 30 September 2010: To me all that stuff you listed is simply part of the overall package. At the core of it all women want a man who will love them for who they are and that's it plain and simple. The other stuff we talk about is just optional extras that we like ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend says she wants an open relationship?
Q. My Girlfriend want's an open relationship and i don't. We have been together for 3 years and are gonna get engaged and married. Still she is barely able to see me because of my job and college. I don't know what i should do....
A. 30 September 2010: If one person wants it and the other one doesn't it will never work. You will end up hurt and bitter. Don't propose to her until you have sorted this out.
Best wishes to you... (read in full...)
Would this work in preventing pregnancy in the same way Plan B would?
Q. Last night my boyfriend and I had sex and it turns out that right when he had an orgasm and was finished, the condom broke. I ran straight to the bathroom and cleaned myself off and made sure that I got most of it out, but I feel like I should ...
A. 30 September 2010: No go get the morning after pill and have a pregnancy test to be sure.... (read in full...)
What does my ex mean?
Q. Well on saturday I made this sign for DJ Pauly D from the Jersey Shore and I posted it on his page on facebook he left me a comment saying he liked it and all that I was pretty happy about it so I told a few people and I even told my ex since we on ...
A. 30 September 2010: Honestly I don't think ex's can be friends until a whole lot of water has gone under the bridge. Cut the contact and allow yourself to get over this guy before you try to be friends with him. Seeing him and contacting him is like rubbing salt into ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't understand!
Q. I am desperately in need of help. I am currently 17 weeks pregnant and live with my boyfriend of over a year. We have not been doing well in our relationship and we fight daily. I am emotional and hormonal and am sure that contributes to some of the ...
A. 30 September 2010: I agree a lot of this will be your hormones in overdrive. Can you join an antenatal class or something where you can meet up with other pregnant people. Talking about these things with someone else who is in the same position will help a lot. I ... (read in full...)
I appreciate that this girl is reaching out to me but I don't know what to talk about without sounding stupid!
Q. I have anorexia and this girl about a year older than me (who I vaguely know) knows. She used to have something similar, and she said I could talk to her about it. She invited me to have a chat with her and another older girl who's having similar ...
A. 24 September 2010: This will be way easier than you imagine because this girl has been where you are so you have something in common. Just be yourself and if you do feel really nervous tell her you are nervous. As the saying goes you can't change that which you ... (read in full...)
My husbands touch makes me nauseous!
Q. I have been married for 22 years. I have remained pretty close to the way I looked when I married my husband. I work very hard at keeping myself fit and looking good. I eat right and workout on a regular basis. My husband is a good man, he works ...
A. 24 September 2010: Try freezing his access to money so he can't buy food and you do all the shopping so that he can't buy junk. Go walking together at night. Not only is it good for his health it'll be good for your marriage cause you can be together and talk about ... (read in full...)
Torn between my brother and the man I love
Q. I am a 28 year old female. I live in the same house as my 24 year old brother, and have fallen in love with one of his closest friends. I tried talking to my brother about dating his friend, but he says its weird and stops talking about it. ...
A. 23 September 2010: Your brother is being immature. My husband is 4 years older than me so the age gap is no biggie. Tell your brother you are going to be with this man and that he needs to accept it. He will come around eventually.... (read in full...)
Should I give it time?
Q. I just ended a bad relationship of 8 years in which i did not love this man but came out with a 4yr old daughter. I saw one of my ex bf at a wedding and he was there with his girl friend. so long story short we end up going out on a date and we had ...
A. 23 September 2010: Don't go there! Run away fast. First off you need to be alone for a while and figure out who you are before you jump into another relationship. And second don't get involved with someone who has a girlfriend that's asking for heartache and ... (read in full...)
How can I spice up the sex life?
Q. So i dont like giving head because my gag reflexs work like crazy and itsends me into a gagging fit. What are some things i can do to spice up the sex life without that. Also im not very expierenced im 20 and just started having sex 2 years ago and ...
A. 15 September 2010: Chocolate sauce is a good one. Smother some of that on him and lick it off. Erotic and delicious... (read in full...)
I stood up to my ex, did I do the right thing?
Q. My ex and I broke up about 5 months ago. Right after we broke up I left for 2 months for my job. When I came back we started hooking up again and I was fine with everything for the time being. He does a lot of drugs and parties all the time, wh...
A. 14 September 2010: Yes you did the right thing as he is jerking you around. When your ex is in your circle of friends you remain polite to him but only speak to him when necessary. Don't seek him out or try to be close mates with him.... (read in full...)
My heart says not to end this buy my head says I should? interracial relationship
Q. I am a white male, live and have lived in a mainly white suburb all my life, and most of my associations have been with others of my race. We are a pretty liberal family and I have always been raised that everyone is equal, but that being said our ...
A. 14 September 2010: The old saying opposites attract is very true. The reason you guys get on so well is because you are opposites. At the end of the day if you really love this girl and want to be with her then that is all that matters. Don't worry about the ... (read in full...)
How can I spice up the sex life?
Q. So i dont like giving head because my gag reflexs work like crazy and itsends me into a gagging fit. What are some things i can do to spice up the sex life without that. Also im not very expierenced im 20 and just started having sex 2 years ago and ...
A. 14 September 2010: You can still give head with a bad gag reflex just don't take it all into your mouth. Do lots of licking and just suck on the head of the penis only. He will still like this!... (read in full...)
Why did it take so long to figure out my sexuality?
Q. I often wondered why my m/f love life was not working. Then I had an affair with another man and gave my self completely to him, it was wonderful. My only question is why it took so long? Could I have known any sooner or what might have been a tip ...
A. 11 September 2010: I would imagine it took so long because you simply went down the expected track along with all of your friends and aquaintances. You say you always wondered why your love life wasn't working and that wondering was your clue but based on your ... (read in full...)
An ex of my husband wont leave us alone on facebook
Q. Hi, my husband and I have been married for about 3 months now. and he just recently got a FB account. about 2 weeks ago his ex (with her 4 years were engaged) friend requested him as well as all of his other close friends. so it annoyed me she ...
A. 10 September 2010: I find it astounding how much personal information people write about their lives on facebook. Are none of you scared of stalkers, identity theft etc. Don't post your private personal stuff on a public forum it's dangerous and stupid.... (read in full...)
Bisexual woman reveals her quite possibly most controversial relationship to her parents!
Q. Dear Cupid, I am a bisexual woman in a year-long relationship with another bisexual woman. We are of conflicting faiths. My father passed away a few years ago so the only person living and raising me is my mother. She is extremely oppose...
A. 9 September 2010: I would call her out on her ultimatum. Next time she says choose her or me tell her I choose her what are you going to do about it? If the worst happens and she kicks you out, you will survive! This happens to plenty of people and they mostly all ... (read in full...)
I might be gay but I'm scared to tell my family! What do I do?
Q. I think i might be gay but im terrified about what my family mainly my mother would say because she has guessed it but I told her i wasent because she gets a look of disappointment and disgust until I assure her im not. Whats nearly as bad is that ...
A. 9 September 2010: As a parent I can't imagine not loving my child any less because they were gay. I would think there would be a period of adjustment for me to go through if my child told me this and I would probably be a bit sad they were following a different path ... (read in full...)
Is she lying to me about the other girl? I need help!
Q. this is kinda tricky, and im in what i would call a problem. One of my friends (female) that we will call F1, gets jealous, and has admited that F2 (also female) always has guys like her more than her, even though they are "best friends". this is ...
A. 8 September 2010: If you don't like her then what she says shouldn't have any effect on you. Forget her and don't pay any attention to what she says she's immature.... (read in full...)
My ex husband sent me a picture of his penis! is he feeling regret for divorcing me?
Q. after my divorce i wrote a question here under this title"Husband divorced me when he discovered they did a female circumcision to me as a child". and now after 2 months of my divorce he sent me his penis picture!!!!! he said that he likes to se...
A. 7 September 2010: Married Lady is right and I stand by my original post this guy is a selfish immature self absorbed prick!!! Block him out of your life. He does not deserve another chance.... (read in full...)
I'm afraid to touch my genitalia!
Q. I have never had sex, or even masturbated. I have tried but I cant. For awhile I was scared to look at my genitalia but I am slowly getting over that fear, I still cant look at it freely. I know the body is a very beautiful gift but for some reason ...
A. 7 September 2010: The "little Penis" is your clitoris. It's the small pea sized bump at the very beginning of your labia in the centre. It's sometimes refered to as that because if you cross cut female genitalia the clitoris is shaped similarily to a penis. Your ... (read in full...)
Is she lying to me about the other girl? I need help!
Q. this is kinda tricky, and im in what i would call a problem. One of my friends (female) that we will call F1, gets jealous, and has admited that F2 (also female) always has guys like her more than her, even though they are "best friends". this is ...
A. 7 September 2010: Whew that is the longest and most complicated post I've read here :-) Seriously though both these girls are jerking you round so I would forget both of them and find someone who will love you back with no complications.... (read in full...)
I'm afraid to touch my genitalia!
Q. I have never had sex, or even masturbated. I have tried but I cant. For awhile I was scared to look at my genitalia but I am slowly getting over that fear, I still cant look at it freely. I know the body is a very beautiful gift but for some reason ...
A. 7 September 2010: No you are not weird. Parents often send conflicting messages to children about masturbation because when kids are little and do it they are told not to and not to be rude. Your mother probably said things like that to you as a child not meaning ... (read in full...)
My ex husband sent me a picture of his penis! is he feeling regret for divorcing me?
Q. after my divorce i wrote a question here under this title"Husband divorced me when he discovered they did a female circumcision to me as a child". and now after 2 months of my divorce he sent me his penis picture!!!!! he said that he likes to se...
A. 7 September 2010: I think he sounds like the MOST selfish prick on the planet. Send him a reply txt saying ha ha ha that thing's never getting near me again!
You deserve better than this guy he's a slime ball!... (read in full...)
Why did he leave me for his ex wife?
Q. My boyfriend left me for his "stupid" ex-wife. I was seeing this man for 2 months. We met online and hit it off. He is 43, a respiratory therapist, works nights, makes 75k, and divorce with 2 kids (female 19/12). Everything was great. We never ...
A. 7 September 2010: I guess at the end of the day they have a serious history together and children which is BIG. Maybe the break away from each other was what they needed to get some clarity and perspective.
Just chalk this one up to one of life's lessons neve... (read in full...)
How can I help my family to cope with my cousin's cancer?
Q. HI Aunts and Uncles I've just had a close cousin diagnosed with advanced liver cancer. He is only 46 and we are all pretty devastated about this diagnosis. His father (my uncle) died 3 years ago from complications with his lungs. His death hi...
A. 4 July 2010: Tisha you are so right. I rang my Aunty and we had a phone call of crying, laughing and crying again. It was great to talk to her and realise that I couldn't really say the wrong thing if I was honest about everything I felt. She thanked me for ... (read in full...)
How can I help my family to cope with my cousin's cancer?
Q. HI Aunts and Uncles I've just had a close cousin diagnosed with advanced liver cancer. He is only 46 and we are all pretty devastated about this diagnosis. His father (my uncle) died 3 years ago from complications with his lungs. His death hi...
A. 2 July 2010: Thanks guys. Was just talking to my Mum who has been talking to my aunty and now the news is even worse. He also has bowel cancer. He is not expected to live past Christmas. I think I could relieve a drought with the amount of tears I have ... (read in full...)
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