Not attracted to obese boyfriend.
Q. I have been with the same guy for three years, we are both in our 40s. When I met him he had just lost 140 lbs through diet and exercise and was running marathons. A big part of my attraction to him was admiration for having lost all that weight and ...
A. 23 November 2009: It's the same with any health problem when it comes to a relationship.... In some cases on here it's depression, in your case it's obesity.
It all comes down to the same thing.... You don't want to be with him but you don't want to dump him for ... (read in full...)
I can't stop having sexual dreams about him help?
Q. I can't stop having sexual dreams about me and my ex, i've been told its natural etc but its not how i am - I'm quite a shy girl and never used to think about sex really. Unlike my friends I'm in no rush to have sex, mainly because I'm quite ...
A. 22 November 2009: Hormones can make your brain do strange things, so it could just be a certain time of the month or another bit of puberty that you have entered.
We all have weird dreams about someone we have no real interest in in real life.
So just accep... (read in full...)
I told him I liked him and he's still acting "normall" towards me. What next???
Q. I told him that I like him and he has been acting normally, is that a good thing? How would I tell if he feels the same or if I should move on?...
A. 22 November 2009: If he liked you he would have asked you out.
Move on if you don't want to be friends with him.
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
How to reach a happy medium between him and my mum?
Q. I am friends with a guy whom my parents dislike due to his previous history of illnesses and the shy/rude way he came across when they all first met. Me and him get on fairly well, and he is very chirpy and fun around me. We used to hang out in town ...
A. 22 November 2009: Well you seem to want your mum's approval so you just have to tell him, "Since you were so rude to may parents the first time you met them, you can't come round to mine."
Then you can either grow up and discover you CAN have male friends with out... (read in full...)
Now I feel like my body is ugly, how do I deal with his comments about my body?
Q. Last night my boyfriend and I were watching TV. There was this movie where a guy was watching porn, and they showed the porn star a lot, with her huge boobs all over the place. I kind of got upset, but said nothing, yet my boyfriend picked up on it ...
A. 22 November 2009: I normally try and read the whole thing and give a balanced answer, and I hate the answers that just say this:
"Your boyfriend is an idiot. He treats you like crap. Dump him."
But to be honest: It's true.
Not all men are as pathetic as this.... (read in full...)
How can I have better luck with girls?
Q. Something which has been troubling me lately: I've been going to a few parties, raves, social gatherings, etc recently, and usually i'll get a bit wasted and just have a good time, chill with friends, rave a bit, etc. The thing is, in the last...
A. 22 November 2009: So you'll chat them up, but not make a move, and then talk to them for a few weeks before asking them out?
Most girls will just think you want to be mates by that time.
You need to ask them out sooner, or at least make some kind of minor mo... (read in full...)
Can anyone shed some light on this? I don't understand why he DOESN'T want to break up...?
Q. Ok, my boyfriend of 6 months recently told me he needed space because he said our relationship was moving too fast which was his fault. However he cheated on me with my best freind and another girl which before he was trying to hide he was talking ...
A. 22 November 2009: Quiet Echo is right. He doesn't want to break up with you because you let him sleep with your friends, and probably chase after him and still make him feel good.
He's one of those guys who wouldn't want one of those troublesome girls who "respect... (read in full...)
How to approach confessing my feelings?
Q. Hello, I'm a 20 year old gay male, and I've got the issue with bringing up an attraction with a friend of mine. (He does not know I'm gay.) Basically, I developed feelings for him, and recognizing the situation attempted to get him to talk abo...
A. 22 November 2009: I think the first thing to do is come out to him, you can't keep lying to him and expect to keep a friendship going.
So tell him you are gay. He clearly already suspects so you just need to confirm those suspicions.
He may well come out to you ... (read in full...)
She doesn't seem to want me as much now!
Q. Im in a new relationship (my first proper one). Im 22 and lost my virginity to her, every thing seems good but when we go to bed shes always tierd and i have a very high sex drive. We were having sex most weekends when we were together but now we ...
A. 22 November 2009: Wow, you sure are getting yourself wound up over this.
You've only been together for 2 months so if you can't handle the fact she has male friends then I suggest you end it now and find a girl who is less social.
As for the sex thing, all I can... (read in full...)
Why is my ex boyfriend's mate being wierd?
Q. A few months ago I went for a night out with my mate liam. When we were standing outside of the nightclub one of liams matescalled mark who I never met before came over and started to talk to liam.When we walked in to the nightclub I went to sit d...
A. 22 November 2009: Why don't you ask mark if he's ok or if you've upset him in some way?
He's the one with the problem so go in nicely and ask what it is.
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
How do I gain more confidence with my boyfriend?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend 3 months and i have not got any confidence around him what so ever, I really want 2 make the effort. How could i turn him on so he want to come onto me? Also have you any ideas that will help gain my confidence? Please...
A. 22 November 2009: Oh you are younger than I thought, if you are too scared to talk to him then you are in no way ready to try and turn him on... you could very easily but you don't want to just yet as you need to get the relationship a bit better first.
If he didn'... (read in full...)
How do you tell the one you love you love someone else?
Q. How do you tell the one you love you love someone else? I have been with my boyfriend a year now and I'm very happy. I started talkling with his best friend and I'm starting to have really deep feelings for him and I don't know what to do... I'...
A. 22 November 2009: You don't tell either of them ANYTHING!!
Why on earth would it be a good idea to talk to either of them about this? This is your problem, not your boyfriend's and certainly not his friend's.
When you have feelings for someone it will only mak... (read in full...)
I've been hunting for a boyfriend for years, why haven't I found one?
Q. I always feel lonely perhaps it's because I've never had a boyfriend or even a date. I am too embarrassed to divulge this information to my friends but since we all met in college and are very close they've definitely noticed I've never been on one ...
A. 22 November 2009: You say you are always looking and sweetie, that's just not attractive to men.
If you meet a guy and your first thought is "Will you LOVE MEEEEEEE!???!!!" then he is going to be able to see it on your face. Guys don't want a girlfriend who's si... (read in full...)
Do I have to change everything about me to find Mr wonderful???
Q. OK so here is what I need to know ... I am 45, a redhead past menopause and very in tune with what I want, do I have to change everything about me to find Mr wonderful????????? ...
A. 22 November 2009: Well then it sounds like a case of bad luck.
But it also sounds like you are investing your feelings a little too soon.
If you meet a married guy then don't get close enough to find out you want to keep him. Always look for signs of a ring,... (read in full...)
How would you label someone who isn't attracted to either gender?
Q. I am not attracted to either gender or interested in having sex. So what am I supposed to be classified as? Asexual, in my opinion, is mainly about sexual relationships. I don't find the human body of either gender to be attractive. I've had ...
A. 22 November 2009: Why do you need to label yourself?
Personally I classify myself as an "Emily" which is probably different from everything else.
If you aren't sexually interested in either sex then you probably are closest to being asexual. Which in a way i... (read in full...)
How do I gain more confidence with my boyfriend?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend 3 months and i have not got any confidence around him what so ever, I really want 2 make the effort. How could i turn him on so he want to come onto me? Also have you any ideas that will help gain my confidence? Please...
A. 22 November 2009: It's not about turning him on.
He probably wants you LOADS, but imagine if you were with a girl who seemed terrified of you. You wouldn't come on to them because you'd be scared that they would hate it.
I think you need to take a deep breath, l... (read in full...)
What does 'I lust you' mean?
Q. what does it mean if someone says to you "i lust you" instead of "i love you"? my friend said this to me and i dont quite understand...
A. 22 November 2009: It means she could see herself having some crazy wild nights with you but doesn't really see you as boyfriend material.
Some guys you get crushes on but you know they would annoy the hell out of you if you had to be stuck in a relation... (read in full...)
Do I have to change everything about me to find Mr wonderful???
Q. OK so here is what I need to know ... I am 45, a redhead past menopause and very in tune with what I want, do I have to change everything about me to find Mr wonderful????????? ...
A. 21 November 2009: If you're an ugly, lying evil person then yes, you may need to change.
If you're a fairly decent person with no self esteem then no, you just need to stop asking daft questions like this on the internet, and get out there in a nice outfit looking ... (read in full...)
Creepy friend keeps asking for hugs
Q. So, one of my male friends keeps asking me for hugs. He does this even at weird times (like, not hellos and goodbyes) and hangs on for too long or tries to sneak a second one in. I'm always hesitant about giving a hug, and I've already had the ...
A. 20 November 2009: Well the main reason he will keep asking for them is because you keep saying yes.
You need to start saying "No, stop pestering me!"
Let him know it is pissing you off.
To be honest he does sound like a bit of a perv. What is the rest of your... (read in full...)
My boyfriend left me, but hasn't turned in the key! Why?
Q. My boyfriend moved out without warning. He was a horrible communicator. His name is on the lease and he said that he would give me the key when the lease is up. Why keep the key?...
A. 18 November 2009: Maybe he doesn't trust you not to turn all the taps on and leave town?
In any case, tell him that as a woman you have far more to worry about than he does and change the locks.
Why risk him being a weirdo about things?
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
How do teachers (especially in the UK) deal with student crushes?
Q. How do teachers deal with student crushes? In the UK if a teacher found out a student has a crush on her/him, do they reported immediately or do something maybe tell other teachers about it? etc or do they just keep it to themselvves?? Just wo...
A. 16 November 2009: Right this is the 4th time I've seen you ask this question.
I'm not exactly sure what you are hoping to hear but I think you need to think about what you've already been told.
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
I have to see her every day and know I'll probably never have her and it's driving me nuts. Help!
Q. I have a crush on a girl at work, dont speak to her much but I know she's dating online. We went out the other day (as friends/colleagues) and spoke for hours about lots of stuff, I hoped to find her irritating but she's wonderful - attractive, ...
A. 15 November 2009: So explain again what is stopping you asking her out for beer and burger one night after work, having a great time and seeing what happens??
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
I don't want to come across as desperate so don't want to ring or text him but I would like to see him again.
Q. I met this guy. We talk but things aint going the way I wish it could.. he doesnt ring much..(sometimes every day other times he goes for days without calling) he wanted to see me last week and I told him due to college and all that stress I can ...
A. 15 November 2009: Just find an excuse and ring him.
As long as you have a "reason" to call then you aren't going to look mad.
Tell him you just saw a film trailer and really want to see it and does he fancy meeting up this week.
Just chill out and relax. Pho... (read in full...)
Any teachers out there??? How do teachers deal with student crushes?
Q. How/what do teachers deal/do with student crushes? For example: if a student had a crush on you, what would you do? and how would you know?...
A. 15 November 2009: Each school has its own policy.
In general in the UK, I would say they would ignore it for as long as possible. And if they say / do anything then they would report it to the head master / head of department.
I have heard of cases here on de... (read in full...)
The blame game!
Q. You know I am not a perfect person(who is?) But man don't stuff like this just make you mad? My husband and I had our car break down. Now I am not the greatest when it comes to fixing stuff like that but I gave it a good try the night before. My car ...
A. 15 November 2009: It's not a question of "Why Do Men...?"
Why are you giving him an excuse saying he did it because he's a man?
He was in a bad mood and acted like a dick.
Maybe his blood sugar was down, maybe he was stressed out by a bad dream.
You can as... (read in full...)
Should I call him again? Or is this his way of saying "get lost?"
Q. I've been getting to know this guy through email recently. Emails were going well and we seemed to have clicked, alot of interests same but some differences. Swapped photos and attracted to one another so all good. We had an issue about a topic on...
A. 15 November 2009: He wanted a girlfriend who would do what he wanted. Since you dared to want a man who would love you for who you actually are... he's gone off in a huff.
You had a lucky escape hun.
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
Why won't admit he hasn't time for me?
Q. I need help! I met a guy online about 4 months ago. We met up and he seemed really keen. We met up a couple more times usually on a Friday night or a Saturday night. We have never been out on a date and apart from texting each other everyday...
A. 15 November 2009: Why are you putting up with this??? Do you seriously think that this guy is the best you can do?
Text him now and tell him you want to meet up in the next 7 days and he has to get back to you by Friday at the latest with a time and place to meet.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't have time for me
Q. Hi guys :) Feeling pretty low right now and would appreciate any advice :) I've been with my boyfriend a few months now and I met him last night so that I could meet some of his friends and people he works with. I had a bit of an argument with ...
A. 15 November 2009: Well you know where you stand, you just have to either put up with it or move on.
As perfect as he may be, if he never sees you and gets stressed by work then is he really the boyfriend you want?
This is not going to be the last guy you eve... (read in full...)
How do I silence my squelching fanny?
Q. when i am having sex with my bf my fanny makes a squelching noise. how can i stop this? help...
A. 15 November 2009: Sex is a messy noisy hairy business.
You are shoving one organ into one that has created slime to protect itself. There is going to be noise.
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
Can anyone recommend a good contraceptive pill?
Q. I need some female advice, I am 27 (virgin) and currently not on the pill, I have been seeing this guy and we want to take things further, I have never really wanted to go on the pill because I think it messes with the female body, but I also don't ...
A. 15 November 2009: Right, asking for a "good pill" with no side effects is like asking us to recommend a "good clothing size" that will fit you perfectly.
Unless we come and prod you in some very personal places we cannot say for definite "This Pill Will Be Best For... (read in full...)
I don't think I'm ready to settle down yet
Q. I’m 21 and my boyfriend is 24, we met online and have been together for about 4 months now... He’s my first real relationship; all my other experiences have been disastrous one offs and this is the first time I’ve actually been on actual dates wit...
A. 21 October 2009: All the answers so far are being a bit over zealous.
Personally I think you just need to chill out a bit.
Talk to your boyfriend and tell him how happy you are with him, and that you love the way things are between you... But tell him you are... (read in full...)
Do short women really make better lovers?
Q. Just curious to know why so many men say short women are better lovers than taller women. I read several different forums, and sure enough, it came up over and over again. Problem was, no one elaborated on what made sex better with petite women. ...
A. 17 October 2009: What forums are you on?????? If you put "short women are better in bed" then of course you are going to fine loads of stuff. If you put "Sheep are better in bed" then you'll find loads of stuff too. Doesn't mean you should start saying Baa... (read in full...)
Is it possible to build a future together when we have conflicting goals?
Q. Hi everybody, I am new to this site but I registered as I have a major issue and I do not know who else to turn to - I don't feel that I can discuss it with any of my family or friends as I live in a close-knit community and I do not think I can ...
A. 15 October 2009: This is crap and I absolutely sympathise. I was very lucky in finding a man who was happy to be an uncle but not a dad, as I feel the same as you.
The short answer is that you need to end things.
If he is 30, then short of marrying a much ... (read in full...)
Fatten and Feed, Diet and Humiliate. Where can I find a woman like this?
Q. Hi all well i have a bit of a fetish/fantacy but find it difficult to meet women as it is a little unusual, Well hear goes, i'm fat very fat and would like to meet a female that would help me get fatter but humiliate at the same time, for exampl...
A. 15 October 2009: Gumtree.com is full of weird fetishes.
People advertise for all kinds of things on there.
Bear in mind that this woman will dial 999 and run when you have a heart attack / go into a diabetic coma. Or just run and leave you to die.
Do this ... (read in full...)
When is my next period due?
Q. wondering if someone can help tell me when i am due on my period and how long my cycle is. also, what a cycle is, is it the day you come on your period to the next time you come on? right so, i came on on september 13th and came off on the 18th sep...
A. 15 October 2009: Take a pregnancy test then!!!
Go to the doctor if you are worried!
I get the feeling you are much much younger than it says here. Talk to your mum and go to the family planning clinic.
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
My boyfriend won't take me to homecoming and will break up with me if I go. Is he bluffing?
Q. my boyfriend is a senior and im a sophomore, hes 18 im 16. homecoming is on friday and he wont take me. he says he doesnt wana go so i said i was jus gona go and he said we will break up if i go without him.. i asked why and he said "because its a ...
A. 15 October 2009: Why would you let some boy control you like this?
The number one rule a girl must learn when she starts dating is that you NEVER let a boy tell you what to do.
If he does then he's NO GOOD.
Go to the dance and if he gets annoyed then it pro... (read in full...)
Is it possible for Mr./Mrs. Right to not be into you?
Q. Quick question. Do you think that the person who you love and who doesn't love you back is simply not right for you? Or is it possible to know Mr. or Mrs. Right, the only issue is that he or she is just not that into you? Thanks....
A. 15 October 2009: You're trying to justify pursuing someone who isn't interested. I'm guessing all your friends are telling you to get over them and you don't want to.
It can feel good to be that romantic victim, who will die waiting like a poem. Plus, you are scar... (read in full...)
What do my horrible, recurring nightmares mean?
Q. i keep having reoccuring horrific nitemares. it`s so realstic. i prepare for bed and once i fall asleep in my dream a figure enters my room in the dark pins me down then rapes me. i scream and it feels so real. when i wake up it`s in fright. what ...
A. 15 October 2009: It could be your blankets / duvet is too heavy. If it's pinning you down in real life then it's going to impact your dreams.
Either that or you are just lacking a bit of self confidence in your abilities to defend yourself.
Take up judo,... (read in full...)
Do guys think virgins are a total turn off?
Q. ok, so do guys think virgins are a total turn off? im asking this because i am one and every guy i end up telling this to gets really uncomfortable even though they are the ones that asked. and then of course they run when i tell them i dont believe ...
A. 15 October 2009: Guys want sex, and many guys nowadays want sex as part of a loving relationship that they know probably won't lead to marriage.
You are asking a guy to chose up front whether he has any intention of marrying you, and then to be sex free until th... (read in full...)
What if I refuse to divorce?
Q. here is a dumb question. I still love my wife and i know she still loves me but she has alot of pride. I want to save our marige but i dont know how. Ive tried convincing her to go to counsling with me but she refuses. What would happen if i ...
A. 15 October 2009: I don't think any judge in 2009 is going to force a woman to stay married to you if she has a decent reason to want out.
If you hit her or cheated on her then you are stuffed I'm afraid.
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
Do casual relationships ever turn into anything more?
Q. Has anyone ever had a casual dating relationship (seeing each other casually like maybe for a year) before turning into a real, committed relationship? Or have casual things always ended up as nothing more than that?...
A. 15 October 2009: There will always be an example of a guy who woke up one morning, and decided he wanted to get married. But people also win the lottery.
The chances of that happening are next to zero.
Guys are all very old fashioned about sex. If you have sex ... (read in full...)
When is my next period due?
Q. wondering if someone can help tell me when i am due on my period and how long my cycle is. also, what a cycle is, is it the day you come on your period to the next time you come on? right so, i came on on september 13th and came off on the 18th sep...
A. 11 October 2009: 28 days on from the 13th of September is today!
So you should be due on in the next few days if you are normally regular.
If you haven't come on by next weekend then buy a pregnancy test.
Good Luck!! xx... (read in full...)
When is my next period due?
Q. wondering if someone can help tell me when i am due on my period and how long my cycle is. also, what a cycle is, is it the day you come on your period to the next time you come on? right so, i came on on september 13th and came off on the 18th sep...
A. 10 October 2009: Go from the first day you came on, count forward 4 weeks and that is when you are next due.
The AVERAGE cycle for a woman is 28 days but every one is different so you could be longer or shorter than that. It can also be a little different every mo... (read in full...)
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