When is enough actually enough!!
Q. Hi. I am 23 years old engaged and living with my fiancee for the past 2 years. We have no kids. Both of our families think that we are married and we wear wedding bands to show everyone as we are married. Yet, there was never any paper signed or ...
A. 18 April 2006: Your family think you are already married - did they ask you when you got married? Did they ask you why you didn't invite them? What kind of lies did you have to tell?
When and how did you start wearing wedding rings? What discussion did you ... (read in full...)
She was drunk when she got my number and email, and when I followed up she seemed embarrassed...
Q. Basically, I think this girl likes me but I'm not sure. I'm 20 now and we've known each other since we were young, but never been particularly close friends. I hadn't seen her in a long time, but she's going travelling for 3 months and she invited ...
A. 18 April 2006: Sorry, but she has a bf and has given you the answer.
What you need to ask yourself is why you are trying to go out with a woman who has shown a lack of commitment to a current bf. She is not a woman of integrity and not material for a high qua... (read in full...)
I'm getting married in 3 months and still care about my ex bf! What should I do?
Q. I am getting married in less than 3 months to a man that I love and have been dating for 2 years. My problem is that I still have feelings for an ex-boyfriend who I dated for 41/2 years. I tried to dismiss my thoughts because my fiancee makes me ...
A. 18 April 2006: Well you should postpone the wedding immediately - you can't make a lifetime commitment to someone if you are not sure about it.
Then, you need to understand:
(i) why did you split up with ex - are you perhaps glossing over the things that ... (read in full...)
How can I let my bf know I want to make love with him every day?
Q. I am 27 year old, my bf is 28, we made love once a week and we live in just 4 miles away. He is the one I first time have that strong desire and every time when we made love, he likes to talk dirty saying "I want to # you everyday" but we did not ...
A. 18 April 2006: It is not clear how long you have been dating him - but it sounds like you are not properly communicating with one another.
If the relationship is serious, then you should be able to have a discussion about your expectations about how often yo... (read in full...)
I was shocked by discovering his stash of porn mags... But appalled when he told me he had just seen a whore!
Q. I have been with my fiance for four years. We are getting married in January. We have always been very open sexually, and we have always been very relaxed and trusting. There have never been any jealousy issues, and we have always told each other ...
A. 18 April 2006: I don't think it is normal for a man who is getting married to visit a prostitute.
You should ask him why he did - what is it that he is trying to get from the prostitute that he is not getting in his life generally. Does he really want to ... (read in full...)
I'm chubby around the waist...when I start my period, will it go away?
Q. okay well im 14 and i have not started my period and okay i am chubby around my waist no where else and i try so hard to loose it but i never can is this baby fat and when i start my period it will go away plz help...
A. 18 April 2006: I don't think so.
If you are chubby, it will be because you are overweight - however, don't go dieting, because you are still growing and need your nutrients - but do be careful not to eat unhealthy things, like crisps, sweets, or too much che... (read in full...)
I don't know if he's with me or he isn't!!!
Q. well i got with matty about 2 months ago and my friends fell out with me a month into my relationship and since they have fell out with me matty wont speak to me i ask him if we are still together he just says dont no i love this ladd to pieces i...
A. 18 April 2006: If you ask your bf if you are an item and he says " I don't know " then that means no, I'm sorry.
It concerns me that you have fallen out with your "friends". Friends are very important. Your first step must be to make up with your friends,... (read in full...)
Am I being naive in telling the guy what I want at the beginning of a relationship?
Q. Should you discuss the type of relationship you are after at the beginning of a relationship to avoid misunderstanding? You see, I am looking to settle down but I know that if I mentioned that at the beginning of a budding relationship most guys ...
A. 18 April 2006: A good way to indicate that you are interested in a long term relationship, rather than a fling, is to avoid having sex with the potential partner for at least a month. A man who will go out with you and not sleep with you immediately will be ... (read in full...)
I want to get with a girl I don't know! Should I slip her a note?
Q. I'm 26 and would like some suggestions on the best way to ask out a girl I like. I have been single for just over a year now but when it comes to asking girls out on a date or trying to chat them up I'm really useless at it because I'am too shy and ...
A. 18 April 2006: I would build up to it:
(i) next time, say "how nice to see you again, how are you today?"
(ii) time after: "how nice to see you again - do you enjoy working here?"
(iii) time after that: "how nice to see you again - have you been on your hol... (read in full...)
He's getting upset about too many hints!!!...
Q. hello i have just seen a question about someone awaiting a proposal for their partner and they have together for a year.... i have been with my partner for seven years!!! and am now wanting to get married. it does not really make any differe...
A. 18 April 2006: Don't hint - talk with him about what he wants out of your relationship in the long run - does he want children, does he want to live with you, does he see himself getting old with you? These are reasonable questions to discuss after 7 years.
... (read in full...)
I have a question and it's very delicate to me....
Q. hello. I have a really weird question to ask and I hope it gets posted. Here goes... I really need some advice with regards to a gay situation, I am male and I'd really like the advice of a "gay agony aunt" or someone that knows how hard and scar...
A. 18 April 2006: There is absolutely nothing wrong with being gay. Best for you to make some gay friends - if you are young, join a coming out group, or alternatively find a hobby like running, rambling, or something, and join a gay group. Then, you'll get to know ... (read in full...)
I was a "rebound" and got dumped. If he comes back to me again, should I give him a chance?
Q. It seems I was a "rebound victim" awhile back. The ex returned and I was dumped, but he never lost contact with me. Maybe he wasn't confident in the decision he made? Anyway, now the ex is gone for good and I have a feeling he will return to me. ...
A. 17 April 2006: Once is an accident, twice is stupid. Patterns repeat - he'll leave you again. You want more pain?
Under no circumstances should you take him back. Move on... (read in full...)
Am I missing out by not having an orgasm every time I have sex?
Q. Hey, this sounds stupid but I want to know whether every girl gets orgasms when having sex, because I think I'm missing out! And I'm worried it's not normal... Please write back asap!x...
A. 17 April 2006: It's only a problem if you feel un-satisfied when you finish with your love-making. If you enjoyed it and feel good, then it's fine.
But if you somehow feel a bit frustrated, then it is a problem that you should do some work on.
If the ... (read in full...)
My ex has changed her ways and wants me back. Do I leave my current girlfriend for her?
Q. Hi, I've got a big dilemma. I've been with my girlfriend for a few months now. I really thought that she was the one. The trouble is that my ex is always in my thoughts and her child, who I helped 2 bring up from baby. I was with my ex for 3 yrs. W...
A. 17 April 2006: Firstly, your ex will not have changed dramatically - she'll be saying this to get you back, and within a few months, the old patterns will be back. You have split up, so move on.
Secondly, you wouldn't even be thinking of going back to your ... (read in full...)
My wife has left me, saying I scare the kids when I'm drunk! I want her to know I won't do it again...
Q. My wife is talking about leaving me. It has happened a few times lately and last Friday was the final straw. She says that when I've had too much to drink (which I don't realise) I'm turning very nasty and scaring the kids. Please help me to ...
A. 17 April 2006: Stop drinking. Tell your wife you love her and the kids more than drink, and that you'll never drink again.
Find out if there is more than just this - how well are you communicating generally. Ask your wife how she feels about the rest of ... (read in full...)
No sex from my husband for a whole year, and I'm sure he's not cheating... Is this possible?
Q. I have been with my husband for 7 yrs now and we have not had sex for 1 whole yr. It's not me. I'm very sexual with the person I love but I don't know what his problem is. He just doesn't touch me anymore. I used to try but got tired of being re...
A. 17 April 2006: This is passive aggressive behaviour - i.e. he knows that you need and want sex, so withholding it is his way of getting control over you.
You need to start communicating - what is really going on in your relationship? What is he unhappy ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend was raped and doesn't want to talk about it. Can I help?
Q. A few months ago, my girlfriend went over to a friend's house to drink and party. While there he took her phone and when I called, he told me not to call her anymore and that she didn't want to talk to me anymore. The problem is, later on some of ...
A. 17 April 2006: At gunpoint???? She must go to the police. If you can, ask her how she would feel if he raped someone else at gunpoint again - say her best friend or younger sister - the fact that she had not reported it would make her feel terribly guilty. If ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has disappeared!
Q. Hello, I'm really getting conserned. I've written recently about my bf who came from New York on Thurs, but hasn't bothered to call me nor text me as his phone is off. Now I find myself worried because he has basically disappeared, he sent m...
A. 17 April 2006: You should text him and say that as you haven't heard from his since Saturday, you are concerned in case something has happened to him, and could he please contact you to let you know he is alright.
Do you know where he is staying? You could le... (read in full...)
Moving interstate to be with my guy, but how do I know he's The One?
Q. My boyfriend and I live in different states. He lives in Mississippi and I live in New Jersey. I'm leaving Friday to move with him and his family until we get an apartment, but I want to know he's the one. I'm leaving my relatives in Jersey and I ho...
A. 16 April 2006: Would you like to be more like him?
How would you feel if your children grow up to be EXACTLY like him?
If the answer is "I'd love that" then he's the one.
... (read in full...)
I've known her a week.. is it going too fast?
Q. Hi, maybe I just want some reassurance but do you people think that this could work? I met a girl 26, I am 32 a couple of weeks ago when I was out for a night on the town. I won't lie, we were very attracted to each other and by the end of the n...
A. 16 April 2006: Well what I would say is that if the relationship is going to last, will be because it is based on openness and honesty. Really, to invest in this relationship, you should be telling her what you have told us - be as open as you can, and see how it ... (read in full...)
How can I meet more guys 14-16?
Q. What is a good way to meet more guys (aged 14-15/16)other than joining clubs? And once you've spotted one you like....then what?! Please help! i want to meet someone special to take away the pain from having to watch my closest male mate with h...
A. 16 April 2006: At school, in the park, at the fun fair, through other mates, shopping in town on a Saturday, at a pop concert, in a choir, at church, at the swimming pool..... ... (read in full...)
Without TV or movies, I don't think my boyfriend and I would interact at all!
Q. I care for my boyfriend a lot, but I think there a lack of communication and it does not seem to flow so easy, which find hard to believe because were been with each a quite a while: 7 months now. I talk to him mostly every day, but online I...
A. 16 April 2006: I always advocate open communication as a route to intimacy.
Say to your boyfriend "I feel I'd like to communicate more with you, as I don't feel close to you".
Say, "I would like to sit and have dinner with you, without the TV on, and t... (read in full...)
I'm washing my hair...
Q. I need to get out of a date tonight-what excuse can I use?...
A. 16 April 2006: Always tell the truth in life - it's easier to remember.
e.g.
"I can't come out tonight because I have suddenly been offered tickets for xxx"
"I would like to cancel out date for tonight, because I realise I'm not really that keen on you"... (read in full...)
How do I found out about moving out? Things like tax, mortgages, bills?
Q. Dear cupid, i am an eighteen-year old girl who lives in the UK. I have realised that I cannot live with my parents who are extremely unreasonable and so I want to move out. But they do not know this and I'm not abouit to tell them as they wou...
A. 16 April 2006: If you are going to University in September, then you are presumably in school at the moment if so, you have no income and simply cannot leave home without getting a job and that would mean giving up school
So if at all possible, please hang on ... (read in full...)
Any chance of my ex getting over her rebound relationship and coming back to me>
Q. Hey guys, Me again. My girfriend is seeing a guy (started seeing him less than 2 weeks after we broke up) who is the complete opposite of me, and now she doesn't even hang out with the group of friends that we always hang out with (we were fr...
A. 16 April 2006: She is going out with someone else now, I'm afraid. You have to assume its over.
However, there are a few questions you should ask yourself to help you in the future -
firstly, why do you want to go out with her so much when you had so ... (read in full...)
Broke up when I was roaring drunk. I never wanted to do that, so do I have a chance to get him back?
Q. Hi, I recently split with my bf and it was the over the stupidest thing. I got really drunk said some things I didn't mean to say, shouted it's over. Thing is though that's the worst thing that could happen. I am totally crazy about him and woul...
A. 16 April 2006: There must be hope if he has agreed to see you. Unclear how you went about setting up this meeting or what it's agenda is supposed to be.
Honesty is the best policy - tell him how you feel, and then be honest with both him and you to figure o... (read in full...)
Why isn't she enjoying it?
Q. Everytime I try to finger my girlfriend, she doesn't seem to get pleasure. It's easy to get her off by her grinding on me, but neither of us can figure out why she doesn't get pleasure from me inserting my fingers. Any advice would help....
A. 16 April 2006: What is a bit concerning is that "neither of you" can figure it out. Your girlfriend must be lacking some awareness of where her pleasure button is herself - she can find it by "grinding" but it sounds like she doesn't know where her clitoris is or ... (read in full...)
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