A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:A few months ago, my girlfriend went over to a friend's house to drink and party. While there he took her phone and when I called, he told me not to call her anymore and that she didn't want to talk to me anymore. The problem is, later on some of his friends came over as well.. and in the morning my gf's friend went to the store to get more beer. While he was gone, his friends raped her at gunpoint. She didn't do anything about it afterwards though which upsets me and she gave up on it supressing it. I still think she needs to get some counseling about this because I still feel it is hurting her on the inside. Is there anything I can do? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2006): Kick the lads head in. HE deserves it. Thats what i did when some freak raped my girlfriend
A
female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (17 April 2006):
 All you can do it keep being there for her and finding out the names of the places in her area that could help her if she does choose to get help.
In england you can ring a confidential helpline called the Samaritans and they listen and for a lot that helps so if you have something like this that is confidential then you could just leave her with the number and who knows one night when she is alone and upset she may just ring in.
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A
female
reader, chachacha +, writes (17 April 2006):
At gunpoint???? She must go to the police. If you can, ask her how she would feel if he raped someone else at gunpoint again - say her best friend or younger sister - the fact that she had not reported it would make her feel terribly guilty. If you can get that message across, then she may report it.
That should also enable her to have access to a range of support for people who have been raped.
She may feel guilty - e.g. that perhaps she was still a bit drunk and somehow led him on (even though that would not be true - some people have an incredible way of repainting a story to see themselves in a bad light).
Tell her you love her a lot, listen to her (don't be afraid of silences), and hold her.
Also, how do you feel about all of this? You may need to talk to someone yourself - I suggest you go to get some counselling too.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI know she does need professional help, but the problem is getting to be able to talk to her about it and seeking it.. but it's one of those things where she says that she's dealt with it and doesnt ever want to talk about..
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A
female
reader, smeedle +, writes (17 April 2006):
If at all possible tell your friend to go to the police, at the very least she needs to talk in confidence to a rape councillor or other proffessional.
She needs a pregnancy test and an STD check all as a matter of urgency.
Support your friend as you are doing but do try and get her to report this as she has been raped and guns were involved.
She needs to stay away from anyone concerned and the house and neighbourhood but definatly needs proffessional help.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAlso, the guy whose house she was at does not want to talk to her anymore after she told him what happened. I forgot to mention that.
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