A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi I am in a 3 month relationship that was going good till a few weeks ago. Recently my girl has stopped anwering calls and texts. She does get back to me after awhile but its weird. She was supposed to work one day and she left my house for work. About 30 mins later I found her work clothes on my floor. I tried to call and no answer. When I text her she was like oh yea, they told me to come back and work nights. She was then supposed to come over and text me that she had got her night shift covered and wasnt coming by yet. She then text me she wanted me to get her something but when I called to talk about it she didnt answer. This has happened alot lately. She says she would never cheat and gets angry saying I dont trust her. Ive never accused her of anything, but the flags are up and Im confused. She gets upset over little things I do and I try to calm her down about them. Lately, I feel like Im the only one in the relationship. She says her friends think she needs space, even though with our schedules we dont see each other often. I love this woman but I feel theres alot goin on that Im unaware of. Your advice and opinions are appreciated.
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male
reader, Your friend  +, writes (9 July 2009):
 You haven't been together very long so its not like you are both totally committed (not being horrible). Her irritability with you and anger regarding accusations you haven't made are the tell all big red flags. One way to tell where you stand is to pull back give her lots of space to the point where it seems like the relationship barely exists any longer. If she searches you out then the wire is still live and if not then its a good way to find out without being confrontational (and I don't mean you).
A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (9 July 2009):
 well it does all sound dodgey.
you've not accused her of cheating yet she denies it?
i think it's safe to say that she is otherwise she wouldn't just blurt it out without having that on her mind.
my best friend (a guy) he was with a girl and she accused him of cheating on her with me! now i would never do that and i knowh he wouldn't and i said to him she's placing blame on you for her own mistakes!
and Hey ho! pains me to say it but i was right.
and you've also said she gets upset over little things?
too emotional due to guilt!
you want to get out of this fast and catch her out i mean the stories aren't adding up she's getting upset of little things like hyserical by the sounds of it if you need to calm her down.
it's not right and she knows it.
and "her friends are telling her she needs space"
that's pretty much the answer there she's trying to let you down gently there that there is someone else and she wants to end that with you on the basis she "needs" space because her friends say so but really it's to carry on doing what she's doing GUILT free.
Hope this helps x ilovebowandcherries x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2009): Something's definitely up. Since you say she insists she isn't cheating when you don't accuse her, I bet that's it. Sounds like a guilty conscience. Sorry I know that sucks, but it sort of sounds like it...
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