He says I'm smothering him and I didn't realize I was!!
Q. Ive been in a very intense relationship for 4 months. Recently my bf started pulling away. We've had very sporadic contact for the last 4 weeks and haven't seen each other at all. He didn't tell me what was going on until this past Monday. ...
A. 16 September 2013: Maybe you should stop blaming yourself for everything in this 'relationship' and face the fact that maybe this time it actually isn't you, it's him!!... (read in full...)
How can I help my girlfriend sexually without pressuring her?
Q. Hello! I have a beautiful girlfriend who lives 200 odd miles away, and, with that said, we only get to see each other every 2-3 months. While I feel incredibly lucky to have her, she has some rather serious intimacy and self esteem issues. S...
A. 15 September 2013: 3 weeks is not very long to have spent with someone so I'm not surprised she is taking things slowly. What do you feel you get out of this relationship that you couldn't get from someone who lives nearer to you?... (read in full...)
Does FWB want more?
Q. Ok.. I'm hoping someone can help... I have a kind of fwb situation going on with a guy I work with. It was him who asked me about it, as we were both single and not looking for an intense relationship, as both of us had been hurt in the past. So ...
A. 15 September 2013: There isn't really a rule book for fwb other than no commitment...
Do you want him to have feelings for you? Do you have feelings for him?
It's hard to say what he is thinking, but considering he knows you like him (you are having sex with him) I c... (read in full...)
People think my guy is so great but they don't see what I see!
Q. Has anybody ever gone through this, or at least seen it happening before? I have what I would call a normally very sweet guy. My family love him and my friends always tell me how lucky I am, and wish they could meet someone like him. They ask why we ...
A. 14 September 2013: Why are you with a man who cheats on you? The issue is with you not with him. He is simply not that into you. While you seem addicted to catching him then want to let him off the hook? If you let him cheat he will carry on. Respect yourself, you can ... (read in full...)
He says I'm smothering him and I didn't realize I was!!
Q. Ive been in a very intense relationship for 4 months. Recently my bf started pulling away. We've had very sporadic contact for the last 4 weeks and haven't seen each other at all. He didn't tell me what was going on until this past Monday. ...
A. 14 September 2013: Sounds pretty much like its over. I suppose you have learnt something from this which you can take to your next dating experience ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be seen as an "asexual" nice guy anymore. How can I change?
Q. I have been drilled from a young age to be a gentleman to women. I have been kind, courteous, a good listener in addition to being myself. However, the unspoken message from any woman I've dated (I've never been on a second date) is that they don't ...
A. 13 September 2013: Why do you assume that because you don't get a second date people see you as asexual?? You need a female friend to give you an honest analysis of why you aren't attractive to women... Maybe it's confidence? Or charisma?... (read in full...)
What do guys like during foreplay?
Q. I have a q: when in bed with a guy, during foreplay, as a woman what kind of things do you do to him (if you're not really into oral sex!), and for the guy what kind of things do you like? Being a woman, I know the kind of things to expect from a...
A. 12 September 2013: In my experience a lot of men get really turned on by watching a woman enjoy herself so I wouldn't worry if the foreplay is all about you, lie back and enjoy it, just let him know how much you like it haha ;)... (read in full...)
Funny dating story
Q. When I was in my twenties I went on quite a few dates. I had been meeting guys through the personal ads. I always tried to stay safe so I would take my own car to meet them. I met this guy in the mall and we never talked about what the other w...
A. 12 September 2013: You can still get arrested for drink driving in a parked car!
But yes, we have all been young and naive lol ;)... (read in full...)
I'm trying no contact with my Gf. But she is anxious and acting up. How do I handle this situation?
Q. Need some advice. I am doing this program where I don't have any contact with my ex for 30 days. I am on my 20th day of NC; Well I would've been on my 28 but I decided to extend it longer. My ex has been sending me random ex, like Do I don't ex...
A. 12 September 2013: Getting together with someone at work tends to lead to these kinds of problems. You can't ignore someone you are meant to have a professional relationship with! You need to reply to her messages in a professional way, state you only want to discuss ... (read in full...)
Funny dating story
Q. When I was in my twenties I went on quite a few dates. I had been meeting guys through the personal ads. I always tried to stay safe so I would take my own car to meet them. I met this guy in the mall and we never talked about what the other w...
A. 12 September 2013: Why were you drinking and driving??... (read in full...)
Men, what is my ex-FWB thinking after I said goodbye two weeks ago?
Q. I ended 2year "fwb" ... had to walk away! I honestly believed that we met for such great reason, so choosing to end all, for someone I truly liked and cared for hurt. I hadn't heard from him like "normal" and when I sent a casual, "hello' ...
A. 11 September 2013: It's really hard to walk away but you did the right thing so well done.... (read in full...)
Virginity and losing it..how do you know when you are ready?
Q. I'm 19 and a 2nd year varsity student... I've been in a relationship with this guy for over 2 years now... He loves me and treats me like a queen. We are both virgins and we are considering having sex. I would just like some sort of guidance as 2 ...
A. 9 September 2013: How do you know when you are ready...? I'm not sure i really knew I was ready until it happened! If you have thought it through and you both love each other then that is a good start...
I wouldn't get your parents involved in your sex life?! Woul... (read in full...)
How do I know if she wants to hang out every weekend?
Q. My girlfriend and I started dating at the beginning of the summer. At that point we were hanging out as often as we could because between our schedules we were only free every couple weeks. Now that school has started again I see her everyday. So ...
A. 9 September 2013: It's important to give each other space - that means time to hang out with your friends. That is especially important at your age. ... (read in full...)
Should I see this meeting as a date?
Q. A few years back I worked closely with a girl for a couple of months and developed feelings for her. I never acted on them, as I had dated her friend previously and also happened to be her direct superior and thought making a move would be ...
A. 9 September 2013: I think you should always play it safe and assume its just two people catching up. If you get on well ask her out again - to dinner maybe that is definitely a date!
You can tell if it is going well by her eye contact, does she smile a lot? Laug... (read in full...)
He never acted like this before. Why is he acting like this?
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up about a week ago. He still things of his at my house we dated for 5 months and 2 weeks. He moved in a month after we started dating. We had taken a break he moved out. A month ago I decided that I wanted to move on so I ...
A. 9 September 2013: I'm sure you will get a load if posts saying this but it isn't good for you or your daughter to move a man in after a month...
But we all make mistakes when we are in love :)
You seem very negative towards yourself - I don't like the phrase '... (read in full...)
Ex back in contact -- any way to tell if he's sincere?
Q. Me and my ex have been separated for two years, he contacted me a year after I didn't want to know, a year later I added him on Facebook. He said he was happy to hear for me and doesn't want to break contact again, then endlessly apologised for his ...
A. 9 September 2013: I agree with the other poster about the nostalgic thing. I've known lots of friends look up exes and fantasise that things will be different this time... I can't think of a time when it has worked out but that doesn't mean it is impossible.
You are ... (read in full...)
I'm terrified that I'm going to come off the wrong way or say the wrong thing and someone won't like me. I know it's silly and that not everyone in the world is going to like you but I just worry.
Q. Here's the thing; I'm not exactly what you would call a social butterfly. I am however more like the caterpillar in its cocoon that evolves into a butterfly. By that I mean I'm very shy, but once I am friends with someone, I can talk and talk for ...
A. 9 September 2013: You need to remember that you make over think everything you say and think its stupid but other people won't. They probably enjoy your conversation and are just as nervous as you!
You will build your confidence, not everyone is really social, many... (read in full...)
Who takes off the condom after sex?
Q. Dear Aunts and Uncles, I've been sleeping with my boyfriend for a few months now, and we always use a condom. Thing is, it kind of gets awkward when it's time to remove the condom. After the act, I always remove the condom for him and wipe the mes...
A. 9 September 2013: Personally I would leave that to him as its probably easier for him and its not really all that romantic! But I suppose it's up to you really... If you feel like its a submissive act, does that mean you don't enjoy it? Are you unhappy being ... (read in full...)
Does it sound like I have social anxiety?
Q. Hi all, I'm hoping you can help me work out whether you think I have social anxiety or not. I'm going to make an appointment with my GP on Monday, but I've just heard of this disorder and it would be good to hear opinions from people who know more ...
A. 9 September 2013: Hi, I work with people who have anxiety everyday so I'm not ill informed! If you aren't a professional in this area maybe you shouldn't comment. I know that you do not have to be diagnosed with anxiety to access the counselling or courses that they ... (read in full...)
Does it sound like I have social anxiety?
Q. Hi all, I'm hoping you can help me work out whether you think I have social anxiety or not. I'm going to make an appointment with my GP on Monday, but I've just heard of this disorder and it would be good to hear opinions from people who know more ...
A. 8 September 2013: Will it really make any difference to you whether you have social anxiety or are shy? GP's can prescribe pills to help with anxiety but ultimately that is no cure it just treats the symptoms. You need to push yourself to work on this, join a club, ... (read in full...)
I feel I made an inappropriate comment on a date and that it might have put the guy off
Q. I went on a date last week with a guy and made an inappropriate comment. I mentioned it being lady's night and the ticket would be less expensive. He said, "you're saved" and I said, "not me, you." He began to laugh but more like a damn haha ...
A. 8 September 2013: I don't think you said anything wrong, sounds like you said it as a joke anyway. Most men do believe they should pay on the first date anyway! Maybe you two just weren't suited. It always hard when things don't work out but I've been on many dates ... (read in full...)
Why would you women wear a ring on your wedding ring finger if you aren't married?
Q. Totally confused over here right about now......... I like a woman who I thought was married because she wore what looked like a wedding ring on her wedding ring finger. At first I thought it wasn't, it looked too plain not a band type ring then I...
A. 8 September 2013: Maybe all her other fingers are to fat ;)... (read in full...)
Is the guy I like gay?
Q. I think the guy I like is gay. But I don't think he even knows it yet. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing wrong with gay people, but I have this habit it finding/falling for gay guys and I would rather that not be the case with this guy. I have ...
A. 8 September 2013: Ask him out, if he is gay but not ready to admit it to himself it could take years! Worst scenario you end up with a gay best friend, best scenario he is straight!... (read in full...)
I'm afraid I'll move in with boyfriend but end up spending most of my time alone
Q. Hi everyone, I'm looking for some second opinions on my situation if that's ok? So I'm 28 and I have been with my boyfriend for almost 4 years. He is 26. He has just asked me to move in with him but I'm not sure if I want to or not. The main re...
A. 27 August 2013: this is more about your relationship than whether you should move in. Are you happy with the way it is? Do you want someone who has more time for you?... (read in full...)
What did my husband mean about proposing a new arrangement in our marriage?
Q. We had a conversation with my husband yesterday. things are not going well with us for quite a long time now. And I am a bit puzzled with what he means. Please don't advice me to ask him directly. I know how he is, he ll never tell me anything to ...
A. 10 August 2013: This could be a sensible way to start separating your lives. If it works maybe it will make things easier when you take the next step - divorce.
He isn't necessarily right when he says you will have no money or will never find a job. You will only... (read in full...)
My sister is pregnant and imposing on our other sister.
Q. Long story short my younger sister is pregnant and I'm not too excited about it. She just turned 20 and was not in a relationship with the father who is unemployed. He wants nothing to do with her or the baby. She just graduated high school last ...
A. 10 August 2013: What do you expect her to do? She must be very scared and sounds like she is in a horrible situation. She needs your support not judgement as it is a bit late to be talking to her about contraception!... (read in full...)
If I tell her that I've been waiting for her, I'm afraid I'll lose her friendship
Q. So im 27, never had a relationship, g/f, kissed, sex, etc... So i went out last night with a friend that ive had a crush on for 12 years and it just tears me up inside knowing that she is just my friend. If i tell her that over the years the reas...
A. 10 August 2013: How is she leading you on? If she hasn't asked you out in 12 years I'm pretty sure she isn't interested. You need to move on. She probably thinks you are a true friend and not just hanging around because you are attracted to her. ... (read in full...)
He's been seeing a male prostitute for friendship?
Q. I'm 36, and my husband's 40, we have a 15-year-old daughter. He admitted last night that he'd been going to a male prostitutes to "talk" and have a few beers, and even gave me his mobile number! My husband also said no sex was involved and tha...
A. 9 August 2013: I would be worried?! Why does your husband need to pay for friends and why choose a gay man? I wouldn't necessarily assume they were sleeping together but maybe this is how your husband comes to terms with his sexuality. It is possible there are ... (read in full...)
A female in denial of her feelings. Anyone dealt with that?
Q. Im curious. Has anyone ever dealt with a female who was in denial of her feelings? And if so, what did it take for her to get over it and come around?...
A. 8 August 2013: I think maybe you should leave this poor girl alone. If she is going through a lot then the last thing she needs is to be pushed by people who are supposed to care about her.... (read in full...)
Cheated on my boyfriend last night and feel so guilty! Should I tell him?
Q. I went out last night and got really drunk. A guy grabbed me and started kissing me and feeling me up and without thinking I started kissing him back. Then he said he would help to get me home safely but he got out the taxi too and we ended up ...
A. 7 August 2013: I think if its truly a drunken mistake then telling him would only upset him. You feel guilty as you should, but the important thing is whether you want to be in this relationship or not? Do you really love him? ... (read in full...)
Will sex always feel like something too big is going in you?
Q. I think it is normal for our first time feel like fitting some thing big into a our vagina which is too small. Will this feeling appear in the 2nd time also? ...
A. 7 August 2013: Everyone is different. My first time was a bit painful but not horrible or anything and I don't remember any issues after that. It might have hurt a little but not enough for me to remember! So don't worry, as long as the man is gentle with you any ... (read in full...)
A female in denial of her feelings. Anyone dealt with that?
Q. Im curious. Has anyone ever dealt with a female who was in denial of her feelings? And if so, what did it take for her to get over it and come around?...
A. 7 August 2013: Depends what feelings she is denying. Women are complicated and not as black and white as men. It might take a lot more to get her to open up.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants more pictures of my friends topless in return for theme park tickets
Q. My boyfriend last summer had a bet that if I could get a friend to flash me he would pay for a ticket to the theme park close to us. Well I pulled it off I got a friend to text me a picture of her topless and success I win! Well he took it a bit...
A. 7 August 2013: This bloke is outrageous! The best advice would be to dump him!! But I know reality is more complicated than that. No more pictures full stop. Your friends don't need pics of themselves passed around (I doubt your boyfriend keeps them to himself), ... (read in full...)
I want to be excited to see him and have butterflies but I don't really get that with him
Q. hi everyone... really need some input from anyone who is feeling unsure about what it is that they want... about three months ago I reconnected with an old friend who I used to very close with 2 years ago... he has a huge crush on me and I thought ...
A. 7 August 2013: I think you've given it a good go but unfortunately if it isn't there now it probably never will be. Most of us know a guy who seems ideal - likes us, good person, treats us right. But there is just something missing. It's frustrating but you ... (read in full...)
Should I have sex with someone 16 years my senior again?
Q. I'm an 18 year old female, and on a course in France last week I had sex with a 34 year old course leader who I met that week...we were both very drunk and although I don't regret it I haven't told anyone because I can see why people would think ...
A. 7 August 2013: The age gap isn't ideal but if you are happy with it then its your choice. I do have an issue with the fact he was your course leader. It is a position of responsibility and even if it was a short course or whatever he shouldn't really take ... (read in full...)
What would be good to wear/bring for a beach date followed by a movie?
Q. I am going on a beach date. the beach we are planning on going to is within walking distance of my house, so we would come back there and watch a movie later. what should i bring? what should i wear ? is there anything else that you think would ...
A. 7 August 2013: I would wear a casual dress with a cardigan to put on in the evening. You will look pretty but not too smart, maybe wear with flip flops or flat sandals.
The beach hair look is a good one too - very natural and pretty.... (read in full...)
I've been feeling really low lately and my partner's jokes are really getting to me
Q. Hi, I don't really know where to start. I don't know whats the matter with me. I know none of you are probs doctors but advise is what i need i think. I'm feeling really low. i feel sick a lot of the time so i've not eaten properly since Saturday. ...
A. 7 August 2013: You could be feeling a bit depressed but your symptoms also could be something else so I would suggest a chat with your doctor. Sometimes just talking a bit helps anyway. Good luck c... (read in full...)
She says she's ready for oral sex. I've never done it before and it bothers me a bit that she has.
Q. I have been dating this girl for awhile. She basically told me that she is ready to have oral if I make the first move. I have never done anything except kiss, but she has gone as far as oral multiple times. One of the times was with a guy whom she ...
A. 7 August 2013: Just take things slowly. Achieving these things isn't a race so it doesn't matter that she has done something first. Tell her you haven't had a lot of experience and you want to do things gradually, there is nothing to be ashamed of. Then explore ... (read in full...)
How do people cope with being plain looking?
Q. Has anyone else ever had this? At 21 I was really good looking, then at 23 I noticed my face changing, not aging like wrinkles just started to look like another family member (one I didn't want to look like) I was still fairly good looking the...
A. 28 July 2013: I imagine the changes are probably more subtle than you think they are. We are all really conscious about how we look, but when people look at us they are often able to see the beauty that we can't see.
Most likely you are getting older. I feel the ... (read in full...)
Low libido due to medication. Is there anything I can do?
Q. Hi everyone. I take medication for depression and anxiety. It's not really an option to come off them at the moment. The problem is it more or less completely suppresses my sex drive. I'm still interested in women and sex, and I think if I had a...
A. 20 July 2013: The side effects of medications such as the ones you are taking are well known to affect your sex drive. You either speak to your doctor about being changed to a different medication or you accept that at the moment you need to focus on sorting your ... (read in full...)
Caught my girlfriend cheating. She doesn't know that I know. What should I do?
Q. Please, please help?? My world has been turned upside down. I have been with this woman for just over a year. I fell in love with her very quickly. I've never met anyone like her. I've loved before but never like this. Anyway, about 6 mont...
A. 14 July 2013: Just walk away, she has been stringing you along. Save your dignity and let her go. What would a confrontation achieve?... (read in full...)
Heartbroken, in love with ex crush
Q. Please help. I have been noticing this man around a lot the last 3 weeks and we've been flirting (staring mostly by him and lots of smiles) we have not had chance to speak but have feeling that we would have got along, just didn't have chance to ...
A. 14 July 2013: We all understand how you feel, having a good cry can make you feel better, pick yourself up and move on :)... (read in full...)
Heartbroken, in love with ex crush
Q. Please help. I have been noticing this man around a lot the last 3 weeks and we've been flirting (staring mostly by him and lots of smiles) we have not had chance to speak but have feeling that we would have got along, just didn't have chance to ...
A. 13 July 2013: I don't think staring is flirting!!! People stare out of curiosity so it can be good or bad.
You don't know this man, you have fallen for a fantasy! If you do want to leave your relationship then that is something you should do, but then maybe be s... (read in full...)
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