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This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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Tested my boyfriend with texts from a "mystery admirer"... and he's arranged a date with her!
Q. I've been seeing on and off (cos of lack of time) this guy for 3years. He was and says he is so into me loves me very much; in the past i found 'his love' a bit suffocating. However recently I decided that i will give a good go to a relationship ...
A. 13 August 2007: Now you know for sure, for absolutely sure, that he is a liar and was cheating on you for who knows how long. The good part about your testing him was that it led to exposing it. I think your gut feelings warned you something was the matter.
... (read in full...)
Tested my boyfriend with texts from a "mystery admirer"... and he's arranged a date with her!
Q. I've been seeing on and off (cos of lack of time) this guy for 3years. He was and says he is so into me loves me very much; in the past i found 'his love' a bit suffocating. However recently I decided that i will give a good go to a relationship ...
A. 25 July 2007: I'm happy for you. You managed.... (read in full...)
Tested my boyfriend with texts from a "mystery admirer"... and he's arranged a date with her!
Q. I've been seeing on and off (cos of lack of time) this guy for 3years. He was and says he is so into me loves me very much; in the past i found 'his love' a bit suffocating. However recently I decided that i will give a good go to a relationship ...
A. 20 July 2007: The civilized peace you mention is worth in itself and I would go for it. After all, you had a love relationship. Sometimes problems like the one you had are good, in a way, because they expose what is not working well, and, with the right ... (read in full...)
I have been having doubts that we want the same thing
Q. Hi there, I have been in a relationship for 4 and a 1/2 years, since i was 15. I have also been living with my boyfriend since i was 18, as we moved to London to go to the same university. Recently i have been having doubts that we want the...
A. 10 July 2007: In my experience, whenever someone asks for "a break", things have come to a point where they are actually considering to put an end to the relationship. I think this is your case. You want to keep the door open, but, deep down, this is what you ... (read in full...)
Tested my boyfriend with texts from a "mystery admirer"... and he's arranged a date with her!
Q. I've been seeing on and off (cos of lack of time) this guy for 3years. He was and says he is so into me loves me very much; in the past i found 'his love' a bit suffocating. However recently I decided that i will give a good go to a relationship ...
A. 10 July 2007: All right, Butterflyfly. We don't know when you'll find the right guy, but I hope you do find him. I hope we've helped you.... (read in full...)
Tested my boyfriend with texts from a "mystery admirer"... and he's arranged a date with her!
Q. I've been seeing on and off (cos of lack of time) this guy for 3years. He was and says he is so into me loves me very much; in the past i found 'his love' a bit suffocating. However recently I decided that i will give a good go to a relationship ...
A. 9 July 2007: I'm with you, Butterflyfly. Only he who has never been through the horrible experience of finding out someone is cheating can disagree with the reason for the testing.
I think you're doing things the right way: you are giving him an option. ... (read in full...)
Tested my boyfriend with texts from a "mystery admirer"... and he's arranged a date with her!
Q. I've been seeing on and off (cos of lack of time) this guy for 3years. He was and says he is so into me loves me very much; in the past i found 'his love' a bit suffocating. However recently I decided that i will give a good go to a relationship ...
A. 9 July 2007: Well, with the information you give, it's obvious he was not just curious about knowin who his mistery admirer is. I'm happy to see that you and I are in the same wavelength, but now I want to add something. I'm with you, not in the test itself,... (read in full...)
How do I end it with my colleague without falling out at work?
Q. The man I have been seeing for the past seven months has been living with somebody else for four years. I work with him and had known him for eight months before our sexual relationship started. It is a Monday to Friday thing and is very intense. I ...
A. 9 July 2007: Well, I'm glad I helped you. I see you want much more than he will give you. He knows this, I guess. So, that should make breaking up with him much easier, in a way: he should understand why you leave him. It will make it harder because t... (read in full...)
He treats me like crap. What should I do?
Q. me and my boyfriend have been togeather for 6 years. i luv him alot. But i wonder if he really luvs me.He never takes me anywhere or buys me anything. If I ask him for anthing including sex. Its always NO! Whats the big deal, Id do anything for him. ...
A. 8 July 2007: Wow. All I can say is, leave the man, madam.... (read in full...)
I have been having doubts that we want the same thing
Q. Hi there, I have been in a relationship for 4 and a 1/2 years, since i was 15. I have also been living with my boyfriend since i was 18, as we moved to London to go to the same university. Recently i have been having doubts that we want the...
A. 8 July 2007: Dear, don't expect things to come your way. Act. If you don't want him back in your life, well, proceed as you should.... (read in full...)
My family tells me to get back together with my baby's father but I'm sleeping with someone else who's taken.
Q. hello i need help i have a really messed up thing going on!! welll i moved to mexico 3 years ago, i am now 8 months pregnet....i was with my ex boy friend and we broke up i started dating a good friend like 2-3 weeks later im i was not sure who...
A. 8 July 2007: Both in English and Spanish. In English, for the benefit of other posters, who can add their opinions and comment on mine. In Spanish, for your benefit, paisana.
No tienes un solo problema, sino varios, y me parece que el principal es que está... (read in full...)
He divides the time we have between his mates and me. What does this mean?
Q. started seeing a younger guy recently, he is 24 and I am 30 everything seem's perfect, but he still likes to spend a lot of time with his mate's, I would spend every availible minuite with him, we dont have much time because i have two children, but ...
A. 8 July 2007: I think you're not in the same situation. You have responsibilities, but, apparently, he doesn't have as many as you do.
I think you feel unappreciated in the sense that he doesn't seem to reciprocate the commitment. Maybe he is unaware of what ... (read in full...)
She's has been having a relationship with her bf's father! How do I tell her daughter?
Q. Just found out that my daughter is having a relationship with her partners father. How the hell are we going to explain to her two year old daughter that mummies new boyfriend is her Grandad. Just can't get my head around this, has anyone else had ...
A. 8 July 2007: I'm afraid you're not exactly concerned with this issue being legal or not. Your problem is, it is not correct.
I don't think there is anything you can do about this. Just hope things don't get out of control when the boyfriend finally finds ou... (read in full...)
He does not want his future ex-wife to find out that we're dating until the divorce is settled, but it's been going on for months!! Should I date other people?
Q. Dear Cupid I have been seeing a man for over 12 months. I am always the one asking when he would like to catch up, inviting him over etc and he tells me that he loves me, wants a family with me, wants to move in together later down the track et...
A. 8 July 2007: I would understand his behavior if it were motivated by financial matters only, or if he were afraid his wife would prevent him from seeing his kids (if he has any), or something of that sort.
I don't understand his behavior for the reason h... (read in full...)
Tested my boyfriend with texts from a "mystery admirer"... and he's arranged a date with her!
Q. I've been seeing on and off (cos of lack of time) this guy for 3years. He was and says he is so into me loves me very much; in the past i found 'his love' a bit suffocating. However recently I decided that i will give a good go to a relationship ...
A. 8 July 2007: I agree that you shouldn't play this games. However, I also think there is a reason for you to. If he constantly says he loves you and you found reason not to believe him, there is a problem here.
I also think he should not go with this game, le... (read in full...)
How do I end it with my colleague without falling out at work?
Q. The man I have been seeing for the past seven months has been living with somebody else for four years. I work with him and had known him for eight months before our sexual relationship started. It is a Monday to Friday thing and is very intense. I ...
A. 8 July 2007: This is a hard one.
He doesn't have a reason to leave you, since his wife doesn't seem to care. And then, you took him knowing that he was with someone else, so I think he assumes that, either you will accept that situation forever, of YOU will... (read in full...)
I gave up so much to be with him, and I know I haven't changed, so why does my husband regret marrying me?
Q. I got married 10/10/2007, gave up my job and moved to be with him in another state, I moved my 2 children as well. 4 months ago we moved to Germany as he is in the Military. Things suddenly started to go down, he told me one day that he married me ...
A. 8 July 2007: I think you should ask yourself whether the relationship is satisfactory for you, as it is now.
However, if someone told me she regretted marrying me, well, I would leave her. These are very strong words and should not be taken lightly. But, onl... (read in full...)
How to get her to find me sexy again and stop thinking of me as just a friend?
Q. I've been seeing a girl for just over two months. she's looking for the same in a relationship as I am and, while we get on wonderfully, she has decided to end it. What I'm finding difficult to figure out is that she says she's not sure that she ...
A. 8 July 2007: Frankly, I don't think there's anything you can do. Apparently, the sex didn't work. That happens. I would suggest you to move on and consider her a good friend.... (read in full...)
He really liked me and now he's so cold. What can I do?
Q. i just dont understand any of this.7 months ago i met a man,he is 40 never been married i'm 43 been in along term relationship which ended some time ago.i wasnt interested in the beginning,but the guy kept phoning me so i gave in and we started ...
A. 8 July 2007: I'm with flower_girl. He should make up his mind whether he wants commitment or not.... (read in full...)
Is it worth investing in this guy?
Q. i met this guy on a dating site we exchanged e-mail address and phone numbers we have been talking for a week now and we found out we have alot in common. He asked me if i talk to anyone else on the site i said yes i get e-mails from others but i ...
A. 8 July 2007: I think he should make up his mind whether he wants to take his chances on you or the other lady. I think that, if you fancy someone, you should focus on that someone. If it doesn't work, well, that's part of the process.
Also, I wonder if you c... (read in full...)
The distance is causing trouble. How do I get through this?
Q. i have been in a relationship for 3 years.my boyfriend loves me and i do the same.but for the past 1year we are sharing a long distance relationship.so i feel lonely at times when he's not around me!as a result i get irritated over small things and ...
A. 8 July 2007: You should think whether long-distance is for you. If it isn't, I suggest you talk about it to your boyfriend. Your irritation over small things -your words- will eventually push him away, anyways, so I think you should desl with this right now.... (read in full...)
He is abusive and possessive, but he says I overreact--please help!
Q. I'm sorry this is so long but really feel the need to spill all. I have been living with my partner for 8 months. About one month after I moved in he started to become very jealous and possessive. He wanted me to stop seeing my single friends...
A. 8 July 2007: Call me old-fashioned, but I think everyone must be held responsible for what he does. So, his punching you and losing his temper ARE things you should hold him responsible for. And I don't think they are justified.
I don't think you should c... (read in full...)
Is it possible for all women to be sympathetic towards me and if not, do they need to be hated for not fulfilling my expectations?
Q. I am obsessed with hatred for women because i have always craved for sympathy from them where as what i end up getting is being manipulated, controlled, dominated and abused which further increases the feeling of hatred towards them and i feel a an ...
A. 8 July 2007: I'm with Love_him. Obviously, not all women are the same. Some are bad, some are good, some are wonderful. You cannot put everyone in the same category.
You know, I see you seek reassurance from women. Women, on the other hand, don't exactly ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seems to be having some form of relationship with his ex.
Q. So I've been dating this guy now for about 6 months. He has a child with his ex-girlfriend. He's told me that they've been broken up for over a year, but he's was living with her up until a few months before we met. He swears that he won't go back ...
A. 8 July 2007: Maybe his family doesn't invite you to their meetings because they want to avoid problems with the former girlfriend. She will always be the mother of the baby, you know, so they can't simply brush her off. Of course, if you're the girlfriend now, ... (read in full...)
Do you talk about exes?
Q. I was just wondering, how much have you and your boyfriend/girlfriend talked about past relationships? Do you know a lot about their previous significant others, or barely anything at all? I just ask because with my current boyfriend, he ha...
A. 8 July 2007: I think he wants to convey the right message: What's important is you and me, now. I have been happy to find some women who thought that way, too. And then, you see he's honest.
You're a lucky girl.... (read in full...)
I have sexual tensions about a doctor that i have never met before.
Q. I have sexual tensions about a doctor that i have never met before. Recently I just saw the doctor's picture on the internet. I thought he was good looking. I am going to be meeting this doctor in 3 days for the first time. Is this normal to be ...
A. 8 July 2007: Yep, it sure is. Just keep your feet on the ground. This is a new person you have never met, an unknown. Approach him as such.... (read in full...)
I said I was going to leave. Now he won't talk to me. What can I do?
Q. My ex and I split up a year ago, we really like each other´s personalities and stayed friends. January, we ended up in bed, and I started to call him more often. He didn't like that and told me off. Then he wanted to be friends again. He started out ...
A. 8 July 2007: Thank you for updating on your question.
I do believe he picked up on your feelings; they are pretty obvious to anyone. He doesnt love you as a woman, but I don't think he was scared; rather, he was very upset. And my guess is he's not upse... (read in full...)
I'm 27, he's 22. Is there a problem?
Q. hello, i met a nice young man who is 22 years old he is mentally mature and understands me he tells me that he likes me and wants a future with me.I like him too and we both like the same things .But iam 27 do you think the age difference is a ...
A. 8 July 2007: No.... (read in full...)
I have a huge crush on my spanish teacher
Q. I have a huge crush on my spanish teacher. I'm 12 and he's in his 20s. It's been about a year since i started liking him. Everytime i see him he always says hi and asks how i am. I blush whenever he talks to me. My friends say that he's a perv but i ...
A. 8 July 2007: Yes, it is normal. There is nothing wrong with you. It isn't normal for an adult to become involved with a twelve-year old, though.
Are you sure his saying hello and asking how you are are anything but displays of the usual courtesy to students... (read in full...)
Should I wait for him or just knock it on the head?
Q. I started seeing a guy from work, we were both in relationships with other people. We both separated from our partners to be together and had a very happy 3 months. He has a 3 year old son who he loves to pieces. He decided he missed his son, and ...
A. 8 July 2007: Mm, I don't believe he returned to his ex only because of his son, no matter how much he loves him. And then I find it harder to understand that he claims he will leave her, anyways. So, didn't he say he wanted to be with his son?
Maybe he doesn... (read in full...)
I'm lonely. All I do is work, then come home to an empty flat, watch tv, read and go to sleep
Q. I'm lonely. All I do is work, then come home to an empty flat, watch tv, read and go to sleep. Day after day after day. What worries me is that I'm getting used to it. I still miss my family and friends (all of them thousand of miles away) but I ...
A. 8 July 2007: I understand your situation, and Martini's, happens often in more developed countries. Where I live, in Nicaragua, some people have to live that way; but most of us don't. I know that you need to work long hours and adjust to a hectic schedule, ... (read in full...)
I have been having doubts that we want the same thing
Q. Hi there, I have been in a relationship for 4 and a 1/2 years, since i was 15. I have also been living with my boyfriend since i was 18, as we moved to London to go to the same university. Recently i have been having doubts that we want the...
A. 8 July 2007: It seems to me that you've fallen out of love with him. This happens, no matter how old you were when you first got involved with someone, or how long you've been with that person. There seem to be some personality differences as well, and the ... (read in full...)
I get mad when she mentions that she is going out with her friends because I get the feeling that she shouldnt be having fun without me and i get jealous
Q. I have a problem I have been living in another country for 9 months and that is also how long I have been away from my girlfriend. We are trying to make this work and we are almost there but the problem is that I get mad when she mentions that she ...
A. 8 July 2007: No one can help you control your emotions. Only you can do that. We can offer help, though.
It seems to me that you're insecure as to whether she will dump you because you're away. I saw your other post and this is the strong impressi... (read in full...)
We have big differences in opinions in the war in the Middle East. Should we not talk about this?
Q. Hello, Whenever my boyfriend and I talk about the middle east, we argue and get really annoyed with each other. Seeing as we hold quite different views (he thinks I'm prejudiced on the subject, I think that he holds his views because he confu...
A. 8 July 2007: What you two need to do is understand that there is no way you'll agree on everything. You need to respect each other's points of view. That should prevent the screaming.
If the relationship works well in all other respects, and you even wan... (read in full...)
Why do men still mastubrate when they have a very healthy sex life?
Q. I was wondering (my bf cant answer this) why do men still wa*k when they have a very healthy sex life? my bf still mastuerbates up to 3 times a week and we have an incredible sex life. i dont know whether to be insulted or flattered! please help! ...
A. 8 July 2007: I think only your boyfriend can really tell.
I am not against him or in his favor; we must not be judgmental. We're here to offer insight. Are you really sure that his definition of "a very health sex life" is the same as yours?
There w... (read in full...)
I think I fell in love with an ex coworker and I want to leave my husband for him.
Q. I think I fell in love with an ex coworker and I want to leave my husband for him....
A. 8 July 2007: I say, you have two issues ahead of you. One is leaving your husband. You should never put an end to a relationship because there is someone else around. You should end it if it isn't working. Check if this is true in your case.
And the seco... (read in full...)
Just found out he has been cheating
Q. Just found out he has been cheating I feel so sick because only 4 hours ago I found out that the man I have been in love with and deeply committed to, open and honest with for 7 years is now seeing someone else. I also found out he lied to me about...
A. 8 July 2007: Many of us agony aunts have been there, madam, so we know how you are feeling. Those of us who have recovered from this kind of issues, can tell you that you were not wrong to trust this man. HE did wrong. If there were any issues, he should have ... (read in full...)
We want to meet up so badly, but we're worried of how it'll go.
Q. I met this guy via chatmachine, and we started talking. At first we were just friends, and it stayed that way for about a year. I heard about his girlfriends, and vice versa, but we were never really close. Sometime before christmas, about...
A. 8 July 2007: Yummy Mummy is right.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says he loves me every 2 minutes, is it a true sign he loves me or just habbit?
Q. My boyfriend says he loves me every 2 minutes, is it a true sign he loves me or just habbit?...
A. 8 July 2007: Maybe he feels insecure about the relationship and wants you to be absolutely sure he loves you.... (read in full...)
If I did "cum" then what are the chances of her being pregnant during this time in the menstrual cycle?
Q. Hey, my name's Jack, I have a massive problem. I had a one night stand and I was totally drunk, I wasn't in control and ended up having unprotected sex (I can sorta remember that part), I don't think I "came" but then again I can't remember much of ...
A. 8 July 2007: I think Dr. Pete has a point here. We should offer help, not criticize. Point taken, Dr.... (read in full...)
Can anyone please help me to stop being so controlling and trust her??
Q. Hi, my name is Andre I am currently in Portugal and my girlfriend is in Canada we have been away from each other for 9 months but I will be back in about 3 months. Anyways I really need help, I know that I am controlling I don't like it when she ...
A. 7 July 2007: Eddie just gave you the one answer you need to hear man. I don't think anyone can improve on his words.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is taller than me and I feel very uncomfortable about it.
Q. Hi. I've been with my girlfriend for almost 4 months now and I love her. However, I have just noticed that she is taller than me. I'm 17 and only about 5'7"ish and I'm really insecure about my height. My girlfriend looks like she is about half an...
A. 7 July 2007: I was involved with someone who was half a foot taller, and I loved it and her. You know, she was the one who eventually worried about it. I didn't care. Maybe this is the answer you need. By the way, I'm also five feet seven inches. Many women ... (read in full...)
If I did "cum" then what are the chances of her being pregnant during this time in the menstrual cycle?
Q. Hey, my name's Jack, I have a massive problem. I had a one night stand and I was totally drunk, I wasn't in control and ended up having unprotected sex (I can sorta remember that part), I don't think I "came" but then again I can't remember much of ...
A. 7 July 2007: If you can't be a father, then you can't have sex without contraception. And, if contraception should fail, well, be a man and accept whatever comes. You do want sex, don't you?... (read in full...)
Is age really that important?
Q. If you fall in love with someone older than you about 7 yrs older and they're married with a baby but her and her man are seperated and we both like each other...is age really that important ...
A. 7 July 2007: I'm with Martini.... (read in full...)
I am extremely depressed that my boyfriend has gone away! What do I do?
Q. Need some Help...My boyfriend just went away and I am feeling sad and depress. I am extremelly depress. I am crying at home, and even at work i got watery eyes.. Could it be major depression or is it that i miss my boyfriend. HELP PLEASe on what ...
A. 7 July 2007: Why did he go away? Is it for good?... (read in full...)
He said that she was the main girl that he would fantasise about. This is really killing me!
Q. Hi My (now) ex and I met in 1st year uni, we were inseperable-platonic best friends. At the end of the year we slept together and moved in together and started a very loving relationship for 2 wonderful years. He was so amazing, always told me how m...
A. 7 July 2007: Now this is a good answer by Eddie. I think I should back what he says, because the fact that more than one people think this way can help you overcome the feeling that you're not doing the right thing.... (read in full...)
We were always friends but I want more. Is now my chance?
Q. I have a friend of 7 years whom I have always had feelings for. She often had boyfriends and i hadn't ever had the confidence to ask her out- as she was a friend and didn't want to spoil that. I had been just about to tell her my feelings, having ...
A. 7 July 2007: I'm with the ladies. I just want to add something about how I would find out about her interest: I would hint my love very carefully, instead of asking whether she feels something for you. Take this in consideration: it might have been just a ... (read in full...)
I said I was going to leave. Now he won't talk to me. What can I do?
Q. My ex and I split up a year ago, we really like each other´s personalities and stayed friends. January, we ended up in bed, and I started to call him more often. He didn't like that and told me off. Then he wanted to be friends again. He started out ...
A. 7 July 2007: We agony aunts are here to help. Sometimes, as Frank Kermit said, saying nice things is no help. If I need to choose between telling you the truth and giving you reassurance, I prefer to tell the truth. You see, you can't build anything if truth ... (read in full...)
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