My parents abandoned me and now they are asking me for help! Please help me deal with the anger?
Q. I have a little issue - I was raised by my grandmother because I am the 1st born child and both my parents remarried after I was born. I never really had much contact with both of them growing up and actually thought my grandma was my mother until I ...
A. 24 October 2013: What sucks about this, and what makes it really heart breaking, is that many kids feel like there's something wrong with them when their parents abandon them. I have two little ones, and let me tell you that there is nothing in this world that could ... (read in full...)
What can I do to supress my feelings, to avoid these emotional pains?
Q. Dear community, there is a big problem that is really really bothering me. First of all, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for about 6 months now, and from all I can tell we're both pretty happy with each other. Everything s...
A. 24 October 2013: Dude, sorry, but you need to leave her. She has NO desire to be friends with an asshole. Assholes don't make good friends. But for some people, they make good boyfriends.
She obviously still has feelings for him, and no amount of talking will cha... (read in full...)
How do I deal with the silent treatment?
Q. How should I deal with a known narcissists "silent treatment"? He is my boyfriend. This is the second time he has done this in a six month period. He cursed at me about two weeks ago and I couldn't take the abuse anymore and let him know how I ...
A. 24 October 2013: That's easy; dump him. There may be a way to end it but there's no way to fix him. If you stay and, heaven forbid marry him, you'll find yourself to be pretty unhappy. ... (read in full...)
Do I owe a family member because she allowed me to park my car at her place?
Q. I need advice so I bought my very first car by myself. I'm so happy. When I look at my car I just smile and just glow because I did it all working 2 part time jobs. Taking up to 4/6 buses a day. So I worked hard for my car. Now here's what I need ...
A. 24 October 2013: She did you a favor, so it's common courtesy to return it if needed. What she did wasn't a big deal so don't feel obligated to her in a major way. ... (read in full...)
If he is who he says he is then I'm definitely interested
Q. I'm a smart, successful, attractive woman in my 30s, and, even though I have very progressive, healthy attitudes towards dating and sex, I can't help but feel a bit like an idiot. I went out with a man I met online last weekend who was new to the ...
A. 24 October 2013: Withholding sex isn't game playing, it allows a relationship based on OTHER things to develop. When you have sex with a guy right away, you have given him the ultimate goal without having to get to know you.
When you withhold sex for a little b... (read in full...)
All I want is to feel desired and appreciated, the way I make her feel
Q. I'm having a bit of a problem with my girlfriend. I feel really under appreciated and unimportant. She cancels plans last minute and when I get upset and express it, she makes me feel needy and stupid for caring. So then I hold it in, which makes me ...
A. 23 October 2013: You're with the wrong person buddy. If you stay with her this will be the way it is for as long as you're with her. You either have to accept it or leave her.
I suggest leaving her, because I doubt you could accept it, nor should you have to.... (read in full...)
My heart says give him another chance. My gut says run.
Q. I broke up with my boyf of near two years about a month ago. I wanted to do this for a while, our relationship was far from perfect, i'll explain this quickly just so you have the entire story: he drunkenly cheated on me in our own bed and I walked ...
A. 23 October 2013: The guy is a liar, so anything he says he's doing should not be taken very seriously. Hell, he even lied about your new boyfriend.
Your feelings also shouldn't be trusted right now. After all, why would you trade a guy who has proven himself ... (read in full...)
It's like he's stringing the baby-momma along
Q. hey I am 21 years old who is dating a 40 years old man we been together for over 2years when we really got serious I found out he got a girl pregnant who is pretty young also I asked him about it and he lied, saying he didn't get anyone pregnant...
A. 23 October 2013: You and her are the exact same.
Your bf has two relationships going on at the same time, with two women who think he's in love with them.
By not breaking up with him you're saying it's okay. ... (read in full...)
Can't get over my husband's confession of being "obsessed" by another woman.
Q. Can't get over my husband's confession of being "obsessed" by another woman. A couple of months ago, a close female friend of ours confessed to my husband that she was in love with him and wanted to have a physical affair too (all in the same conv...
A. 23 October 2013: Unfortunately, I think complete and total fidelity is VERY rare in a marriage. And it's only natural that your husband had a little crush (he calls it obsession) for someone else. People like it when the opposite see likes them, it's just reality. ... (read in full...)
I know I should just break up with my girlfriend but I can't stand to break her heart!
Q. i have been with my girlfriend for 3 years and its been pretty rocky for the last year. we fight alot and dont really seem to have much in common. its one of the situations where we cant stand each other but both truly love each other. i had caught ...
A. 23 October 2013: She'll get over it, so don't worry about her.
If you really care about her, it's not the breaking up that's important, but HOW you break up. Be considerate of her feelings. Don't give her false hope. Don't answer endless pointless question... (read in full...)
I feel like he rejected me when I most needed him
Q. I have sexually lost interest in my husband of three years. I find his touch annoying. We have had our share of problems. Am suddenly remembering all the past hurt and just get turned off. One of them is that when we were dating, he made me beg for ...
A. 23 October 2013: You need more than advice, you both need counseling.
I don't blame you for being upset at him. If I was you I'd divorce him; one of the more important parts of a relationship is that the other person is someone you can depend on.
I also ... (read in full...)
She doesn't turn me on any more.
Q. Help! I don't find my girlfriend sexually attractive anymore. We've been dating about 1 and half years. We do get along really well, I do enjoy spending time with her. She's funny, weird, quirky, clever but I come to the point where I fantasize ...
A. 23 October 2013: No offense to AuntyEm, but that's not the best advice.
Telling her the complete truth will do absolutely nothing with one exception: crush her self esteem. There is a such thing as being too honest. That's like a girl telling a guy "I'm sorry, b... (read in full...)
Why do I always get let down!!!
Q. Why am I always so stupid! I started talking to a guy online in April of this year. To begin with I just took it as a bit of fun, nothing serious. As time went on I started to really like him and looked forward to his emails and spoke on the pho...
A. 22 October 2013: Who knows what happened... I doubt you did anything wrong, it could just be him. Maybe there's something about you he decided is a deal breaker. That's doubtful, but if it's the case it's no big deal. The purpose of dating is to find the right ... (read in full...)
I have a crush on best friend's hot roommate!
Q. My buddy recently got a new roommate, who just happens to be a really sexy, intelligent, funny girl, who does awesome shit like make pancakes and watches all my favorite movies. It's very hard not to be attracted to her. He went out and left us ...
A. 22 October 2013: Take things slow, that's what I'd suggest. That way you can always be evaluating things to make sure you guys are good for each other. ... (read in full...)
I love him, but seem much more affectionate than he is. What can I do?
Q. I'm a very affectionate, outgoing person. I like texting people saying goodmorning and goodnight, asking people how their day is, wishing them well. I do it to close family members and my boyfriend. Because of my job, I work and live several hours ...
A. 22 October 2013: I'm sure he's just different than you, not annoyed by you. It's something that's definitely worth talking about, but if a talk doesn't change him, you'll just have to learn not to take it personally. ... (read in full...)
When a guy says he wont get married as it's just a piece of paper and ring, then says maybe in 5 years, will he ever get married to me or am I fighting a losing battle?
Q. This is for the guys on here if you don't mind helping. When a guy says he wont get married as its just a piece of paper and ring, then says maybe in 5 years, will he ever get married to me or am I fighting a loosing battle? I love him so m...
A. 22 October 2013: Everyone has an opinion on this, and it seems like we all think that ours is the only right one, but the truth is that everyone is different and there's just no way of knowing what he'll do.
Tendersmile says "if it's just a ring and a piece of... (read in full...)
He has lost all faith in me after I snooped, how can I put things right?
Q. I have been in a lovely relationship with a guy in his 40s. His wife left 3 years ago after they mutually separated after 20 years due to growing apart. She came home pregnant and moved out shortly after with her new partner. My boyfriend has a ...
A. 22 October 2013: You can't magically regain someone's trust right away. You just have to let him be upset, but stop apologizing, it just drags things out.
Regain his trust by no longer complaining about his relationship with her and no longer snooping. It'll ta... (read in full...)
How do I stop beating myself up?
Q. Hello, just a quick question maybe a daft one but answers may help,have any guys got tips on how to not beat my stuff over things and dwell on them? for example I did go the gym 3 years back and started doing well but lost motivation and want to ...
A. 21 October 2013: You're beating yourself up because you're not living up to your own expectations. So instead of being proud of yourself you are critical of yourself WHICH IS A GOOD THING. If you stopped caring you'd weigh a thousand pounds and never get within ten ... (read in full...)
What kind of costumes or looks would you recommend? Because the manager's demands seem unreasonable.
Q. I'm a restaurant server and our manager just sent out a ridiculous memo. We have to wear costumes for the week of Halloween or we do not get our tips. I feel this is unethical and illegal. I also learned that if we order through the catalog ...
A. 21 October 2013: In some states it's illegal to make employees pay for uniforms that they can't wear on the street. Also he can't legally take YOUR tips which you EARNED. They are not a gift from him, they are your money and he's the middleman.
If you don't li... (read in full...)
Would a guy ever leave a woman if he really loved her?
Q. My ex boyfriend broke up with me and said.. "I'll always love you..You were an amazing girlfriend" What does this mean?? Would a guy ever leave a woman if he really loved her?...
A. 21 October 2013: I love my wife with all of my heart, but I'm 99% sure that we'll divorce someday because she has some pretty serious character flaws that make my life more challenging than I wish it was.
So, there's likely something about you that he feels ma... (read in full...)
I'm so broken-hearted, he moved his camper, took his dog, he took everything from me!
Q. i meet my boyfriend 3 years ago. i have many children that r older but do have a16 year older and aa grandson thats 10. i have spent a lot of time with i call him sam. i couldnt understand him very well, thought maybe his ex wife he couldnt get ...
A. 21 October 2013: I'm not sure I get what happened here, but I believe the gist of it is he was doing drugs and not treating you well. So, he really did you a favor by breaking up with you; now you're free to find someone who treats you the way you want to be ... (read in full...)
I'm having trouble on how to ask this girl out on a date.
Q. I'm having trouble on how to ask this girl out on a date. We've been talking for about 4 months now and I her friends seem to think she likes me too. I'm just not sure how to ask without looking stupid if I get rejected. Thanks...
A. 21 October 2013: Stop being a wimp. 4 months is too long, if you don't hop to it, someone else will.
Just ask her. Don't over think it. The only way you'll look stupid is if you say something blatantly stupid or make a dumb face. If she says no just say "Alright... (read in full...)
Should I wait for her or should I make the move?
Q. Hi there.. I got out of a long relationship 5months ago.. I haven't seen anyone since then. I met a great girl once and since then we.ve been cahtting everyday and flirting a lot.. The problem was that she had a boyfriend at that time and I didn'...
A. 21 October 2013: I'd give her some space, personally. She probably isn't in the right frame of mind to begin dating only a couple of days after breaking up with her boyfriend.
After that you can contact her. Don't wait for a girl to contact you unless you're 1... (read in full...)
Would it be awkward, creepy, or inappropriate to message my nurse out of the blue?
Q. Recently I have been to a clinic to be seen by a doctor. The nurse that waited on me prior to the doctor was very cute and friendly. I really wanted to try and make some kind of connection with her but it did not seem appropriate at the time while ...
A. 21 October 2013: It's very, VERY common for people to develop a crush on their nurse or doctor. So she's probably used to it and would likely treat you like a little kid with a crush... "Ahhh, that's cute, but I don't date patients." ... (read in full...)
How much do guys care about acne?
Q. Hi.. Well here's my question.. I have acne it's not terrible but it is definitely noticeable and I cover up the redness but the bumps are still there... So I am 14 and all guys care about are looks! But how much do guys care about acne ? ...
A. 21 October 2013: All guys are different. Some guys wouldn't date you, but plenty wouldn't have a problem with it.
Some guys wouldn't date you if you were too short, too blonde, too short-haired, wore too much makeup, had crooked teeth, we're a red head, etc.
... (read in full...)
Why would he have a condom?
Q. So my boyfriend of 11 months and I live together friday he had to go a thing for work for health insurance or something him and his cobworker car pooled together she's a girl but she's from Africa . Any way he had to go to another city which is ...
A. 21 October 2013: You shouldn't have unprotected sex with anyone you're not committed to, regardless of their skin color. To suggest otherwise is good old fashioned racism.
The OP wasn't concerned with AIDS either, she just feels like African women aren't as desir... (read in full...)
I hate her for leaving me but giving everyone else a second chance. Is this wrong?
Q. During my freshman year of high school, my best friend left me in December. She never gave a reason, and was suddenly out of my life. It was tragic, but I wasn't alone. I had my sister, my best friend (who goes to another school), and my mother. B...
A. 21 October 2013: Is this normal? Almost everything is normal.
Will everyone treat you like this? Everyone is different, so no.
The lesson you need to learn is that your actions have consequences and everyone reacts to things differently. Your friend obviously... (read in full...)
Should I consider marrying my best friend, even though I don't feel anything for him?
Q. I have a friend we have been really best buddies since 5 years and started to like me but i dont have feelings for him, he proposed me n i became mad and ended our friendship, after a year i contacted him because i was really falling apart due to my ...
A. 21 October 2013: Why don't you do the sensible thing and date him first? Why marry him, find out you can't ever feel anything for him then leave him or cheat?
Just test the waters. You may not feel anything now, but over a relatively short period of time that may... (read in full...)
I think my boyfriend is going mad because he's convinced I'm cheating on him!
Q. Hi my boyfriends thinks im cheating on him i would never do that ! he keeps on recording me and then he says he can hear me with men, i think he is going mad because i no i have never done anythink and he is sure i am i dont no how to make him ...
A. 20 October 2013: At some point you have to make a difficult decision and either leave someone like that or ensure they get help. He may not be crazy, but he's definitely got some major abandonment issues or something.
There's nothing you can say that will cha... (read in full...)
Why would he have a condom?
Q. So my boyfriend of 11 months and I live together friday he had to go a thing for work for health insurance or something him and his cobworker car pooled together she's a girl but she's from Africa . Any way he had to go to another city which is ...
A. 20 October 2013: "BUT she's from Africa"? Let me tell you that there are some stunning African women out there, so it's entirely possible he did cheat. It's just as likely as if the girl was from wherever you wouldn't have felt the need to mention her ethnicity. ... (read in full...)
He said the message on his phone was a trap to see if I was snooping
Q. Hi im in a relationship with an aries, I saw on his phone msgs to another woman saying he had feelings for her apparently she was in spain, I asked him about this as I was packing to leave, things got heated n he said he didnt want me to leave, we ...
A. 20 October 2013: He's full of shit. Now what?
... (read in full...)
Got the MM and it hasn't exactly been "happily ever after"
Q. this is very long winded so anybody who has the patience to read and answer...thankyou in advance! 5 years ago i started an affair with a married man. at first it was just fun then it got deeper and everybody started getting hurt. eventually...
A. 20 October 2013: I don't get what the question is... Whatever it is, you already know the answer: leave! Get ghost like Casper! ... (read in full...)
What should I do? My boyfriend is not pleased I am not a virgin.
Q. my boyfriend asked me if i'm a virgin or not.i told him the truth,am not a virgin and he's not pleased at all because he's a virgin.what should i do?...
A. 19 October 2013: Tell him to accept you the way you are or go find himself a virgin. ... (read in full...)
Embarrassed at the end of our first date
Q. I went on a first date with a guy yesterday we've known each other for a week, and I can tell he likes me but sometimes he's really unpredictable, well at the end of the date he kissed me on my lips like a little peck on the lips I thought he was ...
A. 19 October 2013: What are you worried about? It was a harmless misunderstanding. ... (read in full...)
What shall I do if my old manager gets this job?
Q. Hi, Please help. About 8 years ago I left my job in a call centre because of my manager. She took an instant dislike to me and made my job miserable that I started getting panic attacks. I left there and started another job in another c...
A. 19 October 2013: I agree, go to the person who has a say in who gets hired and tell them that you used to work for her and she is a very difficult person to work for and that you don't think hiring her would be in the best interest of the company.
... (read in full...)
I'm hurting so bad, I'm losing him. Please help!!
Q. I really need some advice. I feel like I'm dying a slow painful death. I've been with my bf for 3 years. We're the same age. We aren't living together but spent our weekends/a couple days a week together. We've been through, and overcome, a lot in ...
A. 19 October 2013: I'm sorry about the pain this is causing you. It'll get better, it just takes time.
Here's what's happening right now. Your boyfriend still loves you, but has had enough of the fighting. You guys had the chance to fix things, but didn't and this... (read in full...)
Very devastated that my boyfriend looked at gay porn.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and we live together. I love him and trust him. Though, I noticed our computer has been running slow. I did an antivirus run and I found a virus on the computer. I wondered where it came from. So, I ...
A. 19 October 2013: Well, it sounds like he's bi. Is that a deal breaker? I wouldn't have a problem with it, but to each his own.
I don't think he's gay unless you're all of a sudden noticing a bunch of things that indicate he is, such as not liking sex, being gr... (read in full...)
Was this some sort of revenge for breaking up?
Q. Yesterday an ex-lover sent me a text message and I simply replied. Then he called me and we began to have a conversation about our past. My ex finally gave me a chance to explain my side of the story about how we ended up going our separate ways. I ...
A. 19 October 2013: Why do you say he's not a cheater? What exactly do you think happened here? Who knows if he's done it before or not, but he is a cheater.
It's hard to tell exactly why he did it, probably he wanted sex, maybe she did something that made him feel... (read in full...)
Was this some sort of revenge for breaking up?
Q. Yesterday an ex-lover sent me a text message and I simply replied. Then he called me and we began to have a conversation about our past. My ex finally gave me a chance to explain my side of the story about how we ended up going our separate ways. I ...
A. 18 October 2013: Why do you say he's not a cheater? What exactly do you think happened here? Who knows if he's done it before or not, but he is a cheater.
It's hard to tell exactly why he did it, probably he wanted sex, maybe she did something that made him feel... (read in full...)
He ended it, he text again.. Can anyone tell me what is happening here?
Q. I met this guy 6 weeks ago while I was on a hen. Im from Ireland hes from London. We totally clicked!! Anyway, long story short we spoke everyday for 4 weeks and then he came to stay with me for a weekend. It was amazing, until the Saturday night I ...
A. 18 October 2013: It seems he made it pretty clear that you guys aren't together any more, and nothing he's said has contradicted that.
So, why is he still in touch with you? What does he have to gain from small talk? Use your imagination... Unless you only wan... (read in full...)
Can guys look past this hair I have?
Q. I have a strange question. I am a girl and have hair in irregular sopts on my body (lower back, butt, and stomach). Ive went to the doctor and she said that there is no was to get rid of all of it. Im taking birth controll hoping that will help with ...
A. 18 October 2013: Not everybody is the same. I'd be lying if I said it wouldn't bother some people, but that shouldn't concern you, because those people obviously aren't meant for you. Just as some guys prefer brown hair, they may not like a redhead. No biggie, find ... (read in full...)
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