A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?
Q. Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...
A. 17 January 2012: The way you think is not the issue. It's the volume of time spent doing it. You're over thinking it.
ONE film about a 40 year old virgin. ONE.
... (read in full...)
A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?
Q. Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...
A. 16 January 2012: I appreciate that this is a big step for you and it deserves serious consideration, but the reason you remain a virgin is becoming more and more evident the longer this thread continues.
The time you spend here, typing, analysing, turning ... (read in full...)
Exes and Facebook etiquette!
Q. When should I return to facebook? My ex who has been deleted once then re-added (because I thought we were errrr ...friends??) has met someone else, and is in a relationship...facebook has noted this...lol!! I am kinda happy for him... but he was a ...
A. 11 January 2012: You're very welcome. Life is so much more simple when you haven't the weight of everyone else's opinions sitting on your shoulders.
Best of luck.... (read in full...)
I'm on the chase, what do I do?
Q. the boy i like, i think he has the idea that i like him by rumours. However, i dont think he believes them but has something on his conscious that makes him believe. I want to show him with out being to blantant and without telling i have his number ...
A. 11 January 2012: Get off the chase. Let him pursue you. He's been told you fancy him and your friendly demeanour with him confirms as much. You've done your bit now let him do his. Give him time to work up the courage to approach you.
... (read in full...)
How can I make him understand it's too late?
Q. I could use some advise if anyone has any "insight" or experience or wise words... I have an ex-boyfriend who doesn't seem to understand what's wrong with what he does... Short: We date 3 years. He's always been open about having a crush o...
A. 11 January 2012: The only way he will understand it's over is when he never hears from you again. Block his phone and emails.
If there is nothing more to talk about then stop talking. As long as there is an open line of communication he has a chance (it worked f... (read in full...)
Why won't my long-term boyfriend be my Facebook friend?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for four years. We're stable and recently moved in with each other and we've never had trust issues (no concerns of cheating, etc). It's been an ongoing joke for a while now that once we move in together we should ...
A. 11 January 2012: The whole point of Facebook, for me, is to play FarmVille not socialise. The only people on my list are those who leave me alone and/or play FarmVille themselves. There are a lot of other games and it might be that your boyfriend plays one of them ... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend's mum dislike me?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almsot 2 years now, I'm 18 and he's 20. We both go to the same University (which is a 2 hour journey away from our parents) and we're planning on living together next year (but I'm scared of telling his ...
A. 11 January 2012: I wasn't offended at all and I did not think you a lowly teenager. I was giving you what might have been his mum's perspective so you didn't take her treatment of you too much to heart.
... (read in full...)
How do I tell him it's over through text?
Q. am just 16 and my bf is 29..i love him but right now,i have every doubt that he loves me to..but when ever he is tickled he plays with me and tells me how much he love me just 2 make love with him..am so used to him that everytime i cry when ever he ...
A. 10 January 2012: I strongly suggest you say nothing to him. Just block him and don't speak to him again. Opening a dialogue only exposes you to the risk of being tricked into staying. ... (read in full...)
My ex wanted to reconcile, now she's conflicted between me and another guy. What should I do?
Q. Don't know how many people here have read my older questions but to start things off me and my ex broke up last summer after a 5 year relationship and things ended in quite an ugly fashion. Last November she contacted me via email stating that she's ...
A. 10 January 2012: Call it quits. She has to resolve matters with one before she can move forward with the other and it wouldn't be fair to you to wait around.
That's not to say you can't have a future with her, but she won't be in any hurry to resolve anything... (read in full...)
Exes and Facebook etiquette!
Q. When should I return to facebook? My ex who has been deleted once then re-added (because I thought we were errrr ...friends??) has met someone else, and is in a relationship...facebook has noted this...lol!! I am kinda happy for him... but he was a ...
A. 9 January 2012: Deleting him from Facebook is appropriate since you're no longer dating and aren't maintaining a friendship. You're sitting here stressing yourself out about how you look to others and what they might think of you, all for nothing. And you... (read in full...)
How do I answer his question? I don't know what he meant
Q. Hello, ok I was asked this question by a guy whoo recently got in contact and we have been messaging and he asked me this question and I was wondering if I can have some advise on what he's asking..ok the question is; are you inlove in life? Is he ...
A. 9 January 2012: I think he was asking if you had a boyfriend, but there is nothing wrong with telling him you didn't understand the question.
Word of advice...I strongly suggest you learn to get over being shy, especially with men, or you'll find yourself... (read in full...)
I'm leaving my abusive partner. How can I make this break without anymore arguing as I don't want to antagonise him?
Q. What should i do with my abusive partner? My partner is in his early 40s, he has been abusive in the past and spent 8 weeks in the past in prison for punching me in the face. After a lot of soul searching i forgave him and resumed a relation...
A. 8 January 2012: You can start by calling the police and pressing charges. It will be very difficult for him to antagonise you from a jail cell. It will also add another incident to his criminial record thus making child custody easier for you (and benefitial for ... (read in full...)
How do I help myself?. As I can't change him. Do alcoholics tend to avoid loved ones who are concerned about them and hang around with their "drinking buddies?
Q. I am positive my boyfriend is an alcoholic. I just put the pieces together and it all adds up every time he goes on these binges, I don't hear from him. I thought he didn't want me anymore but it wasn't that, I know he loves me. It is the drinking...
A. 8 January 2012: Alcoholics tend to avoid anyone who interferes with their ability to indulge in alcohol, be they friend or loved one.
You knew this man had a serious drinking problem before you began dating him. He's been incommunicado for the past three weeks (f... (read in full...)
How can I become my husband's best friend?
Q. i have been married 14 year and the first couple of years were good but then i got insecure and snooped and as he says i was controlling him for a long time. I have been going to counseling but haven't quite been there the last couple months b...
A. 8 January 2012: The way to prove he can trust you with questions is to stop asking them. You've been unable to prove you've changed because you haven't changed. Not because he won't co-operate. You're doing the same things you did before but expecting a different ... (read in full...)
A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?
Q. Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...
A. 8 January 2012: Her age, the fact that she is a work colleague and you haven't known her very long make her a pretty big risk and I suggest you either take a pass, or take it very, very slowly and really get to know her.
That's not to say that all office romances... (read in full...)
What is a tactful way to introduce people without looking like a match-maker?
Q. I'm not sure if this is a problem or if I'm making a big deal out of nothing. I met a guy a few months ago via a social group that I joined when I moved. He was very warm, very kind, and later sent me a message from his personal email and that is ...
A. 8 January 2012: I suggest you make no introductions and say nothing more to her about it, or him, unless she specifically brings it up. If she does simply tell her you're not a match maker. Keep it casual, but be clear and brief. Then move on to another topic of ... (read in full...)
Gift of the Magi Gone Wrong
Q. Okay, this is a sort of late question but I've been hesitating. I didn't want to resort to this website but here it goes. My boyfriend and I love the story The Gift of Magi. It's a short story about a young married couple that struggles wi...
A. 8 January 2012: I do believe you are over thinking this. He seemed to like the gifts you got him and he clearly put some thought and effort into what he got you. People react to gifts and surprises in their own way so don't measure HIS joy by how YOU would react. ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to be having a relationship with my 19 year old relative? HIs Mom is my half sister
Q. Im asking for help im 28 years old and im having sex with my 19 year old nepheew. Is that wrong. we both love each other every much. his mother is my half sister (like it makes a diffence) and she knows and she doesn't approve of it what should i ...
A. 8 January 2012: This is called incest. Even if your half sister had been a step sister (and therefore not related by blood) it would be a violation of boundaries. Your sister's disapproval is understandable and appropriate. Philandering with her son is not.
... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend's mum dislike me?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almsot 2 years now, I'm 18 and he's 20. We both go to the same University (which is a 2 hour journey away from our parents) and we're planning on living together next year (but I'm scared of telling his ...
A. 8 January 2012: Despite what you've said there is nothing in your post to prove she dislikes you in particular, just that she's concerned about him with women in general and you happen to be the one there now.
It's been my experience and observation that mothers ... (read in full...)
Three months in and I'm conflicted. Should I stay in the relationship or end it?. I'm really lonely.
Q. Hi everyone I have been dating this guy for about 3 months and im kind of conflicted. Part of me wants the relationship to end but part of me thinks that I'm just being stupid. It's like I can't be satisfied. If the relationship continues, ...
A. 8 January 2012: It would help us to help you if we knew what it was you were unsatisfied about. Is he doing or not doing something wrong? Or are you just not passionate about him, but would miss him if he weren't around?
What makes you think that one day of not h... (read in full...)
How do I tell my fwb guy that I am pregnant?
Q. Hi everyone I really need your help I have just found out I'm pregnant by my fwb of 9 months I have asked him if we are gonna be together someday and he said yes but how am I gonna tell him I'm pregnant he has a daughter from a previous relationship ...
A. 8 January 2012: You come right out and say 'I'm pregnant'. Pretty straight forward. Then I suggest you adopt the 'hope for the best and plan for the worst' philosophy. That means you may be left raising this child on your own, so don't rely on anything he says now. ... (read in full...)
Can my LDR boyfriend have blocked me on msn by mistake?
Q. I've been in a long distance relationship with a British man for eight years. Although our relationship is fantastic when we are together, I've caught him trying to cybercheat on me several times. He loves women's attention, and has several female ...
A. 7 January 2012: I guess that depends on the service you're using. MSN and Yahoo allow one to block specific people or appear offline to everyone. I'm pretty sure Skype does as well. If he appears online on one of your accounts but not on the other then he ha... (read in full...)
How can I either improve my singing voice or learn to feel comfortable with it as is?
Q. At school I got put in a class that I didn't pick because what I picked was full. The class I got put in was chorus and I can't sing at all. Today we song and I was the one that stuck out because I had the worst voice so I had to practice in front...
A. 7 January 2012: Have you considered practising at home in private? With all the information on the internet, there are bound to be websites that can give you some tips, including breathing exercises, that will improve your singing. That or you can buy a CD.
It ma... (read in full...)
What exactly does 'taking it to the next level' mean?
Q. What does it mean to you "take it to the next level" regarding relationships? I hear this all the time and I'm starting to doubt what this means. Please share your definitions. I know what it means to feel closer or more distant and even have con...
A. 7 January 2012: 'Take it to the next level' is just a generic term that simply means some kind of progress or advancement.
Personally it has been so overused that is now on my pet peeve list.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's bestfriend and I hate each other
Q. I've been having this huge problem lately, it's always the reason why my relationship with my lover is floating. okay so I've been with my bf for like 14 months, I really really love him. I'm possessive and all. about like half a year he started ...
A. 7 January 2012: If I were to hazzard a guess I'd say that your possessiveness is the cause of the problem here not this friend.
Possessive people are very demanding people and the more work you are for him, the more appealing this friend is going to be.
You ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to feel angry after breaking up with a loser?
Q. About a month ago I broke up with my then-boyfriend. We had been together for a year and a half at that point (it was an online relationship), but he was not good for me for a number of reasons, most obviously because he is 31 years older than me. ...
A. 7 January 2012: Yes, it is normal to feel angry, but like another aunt said, I think you're mostly angry with yourself for allowing someone to use you and put you at risk.
... (read in full...)
Can my LDR boyfriend have blocked me on msn by mistake?
Q. I've been in a long distance relationship with a British man for eight years. Although our relationship is fantastic when we are together, I've caught him trying to cybercheat on me several times. He loves women's attention, and has several female ...
A. 7 January 2012: His story is plausible if he had tried to blocked someone else whose name was close to yours and clicked on yours by mistake. However in light of the fact that he's cheated before (trying to cheat and cheating are one in the same as far as I'm ... (read in full...)
Are we ready for a threesome?
Q. Hi! Want to know if you think we are ready for a threesome. We have been married for 6 years and have children. We both come from a conservative Middle Eastern background, we are not fully liberal but both are relatively open minded. W...
A. 4 January 2012: The fact that your wife isn't keen on a threesome but is willing to participate in one because of her love for you is reason enough NOT to have one.
This is a disaster waiting to happen. People who don't want them but go along to please someone ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend of 4 years started being a prostitute.
Q. i found out my girlfriend started hooking she says she only been doing it for a month.she is a heroin addict that recently was taken off methadone. she says she is only giving blowjobs i know different.she said she started doing this because i am ...
A. 25 December 2011: Her drug addiction and the prostitution exposes both of you to enormous risks and not just sexual ones either. For this reason alone, I would end the relationship.
The thing with drug addicts is you can't really connect with them because they are... (read in full...)
Tips for time management?
Q. Lets get all the issues out there. I have a huge problem with time management and my lovely wife has decided the way to try and punish me is to be passive agressive. I want to fix the lateness issue. Example tonight was xmas eve. She got dressed ...
A. 25 December 2011: Frequent tardiness could be a sign that you have given an upcoming event greater significance than is healthy and appropriate. You've made what should be a nice encounter into a make or break scenario. The result is is takes far longer for you to ... (read in full...)
What did he mean by this?
Q. A guy said this to me: "I get worried when we both start flirting because I don't know if were both still joking or being serious". I'm not really sure what he meant. What did he mean by this??...
A. 25 December 2011: He's concerned that unless both parties are flirting for the same reason someone is going to end up hurt. However I can't tell if he is looking out for you or himself.
If you don't like him as anything more than a friend I suggest you not risk... (read in full...)
I cant understand why this man chose to comment on my virginity!
Q. Yesterday I was at the book store and I ran into a man who's in my class. We've only exchanged pleasantries, nothing more. Yet he seemed it he was very rude to me, making a very inappropriate comment about me. We had been talking and he said he h...
A. 25 December 2011: You're right. It was a tad forward.
So what's your question?... (read in full...)
How many kisses x x x x is the right number of x x x x in an online message to someone I'm interested in?
Q. Hello just a quick question, how many x's do you think are suitable to put at the end of a text/ facebook message to the opposite sex? Without giving the wrong impression, or should i just put none at all. Sometimes my boyfriend gets jealous when i ...
A. 25 December 2011: Put none at all. Kisses raise too many questions among too many people. The best way to avoid fights is to avoid the misunderstandings that lead to them. ... (read in full...)
We have sex a few times a week. He wants to be friends. So why does he want to keep all this secret?
Q. I met this guy who just moved here and we started talking. after one month we hooked up and had sex.i asked him if we're just friends an he replied saying obviously we are more than that...but he doesn't want people to know so I tried my best to hide...
A. 25 December 2011: You were never a good and close friend. You were a sexual outlet and he has lost interest in the sex.
Word of advice, in future you never ASK a guy if you're a couple or just friends. If you want a relationship, you TELL him you only engage i... (read in full...)
How do you learn to let go of the past completely so I can be fulfilled in my life?
Q. I'm having a hard time forgiving myself for things that have happened in the past year, and it's starting to hold me back. With the new year coming up I'm hoping for some suggestions so I can let this all go. At the start of 2011 I was living with ...
A. 25 December 2011: You learn to let go of one thing by giving yourself something else to grab on to.
You became hung up on the past because you stopped living in the present and for the future. Not the other way round.
Do things that give you pride in yourself. Ge... (read in full...)
Boyfriend lies about his past with ex
Q. i have been dating my current and first boyfriend for half a year now. everything has been going well except for several lies and behaviors surrounding the issue of his only ex-girlfriend who he dated for 7 years (albeit 5 years of that was long ...
A. 25 December 2011: If you want him to be honest with you, then you're going to have to start by being honest with yourself and then with him. I think the real reason you doubt his love for you is because his ex-girlfriend was his first so you assume she has imprinte... (read in full...)
He's on a 'am I hot or not' site and it's really hurt me..
Q. I have asked and been given some really good advice from this site before so I am hoping again you can help me. I have been with my partner over 2 years, this year we have had a bit of a rough patch, but things have been great recently,or so I ...
A. 24 December 2011: No, you are not over reacting.
He's checking the market to see what's out there and he's making himself visible to other women. That tells me, as it ought to tell you, that he isn't nearly as commited to you as you are to him.
In his mind b... (read in full...)
My husband said he doesn't love me. Should I just move on?
Q. have trouble in communicating with my husband..he told me he doesn't love me..but there are some ways that i feel he's just not telling me what he really feels..there are some point that i still thinks that he has another woman..but he insisted in ...
A. 23 December 2011: Let go and move on. Whether he's met someone else or not is irrelevant. He said he does not love you. That leaves no room for doubt. ... (read in full...)
My b/f's ex calls every month to remind his to pay his support and its stressing us out!
Q. My boyfriend pays his child maintenance on the first of every month and he has never defaulted, pays the full amount plus extras, but the ex phones him first thing in the morning every single first day of the month, every month without fail to tell ...
A. 23 December 2011: The fact that she is so predictable and specific about when she calls should make this easier to deal with. Turn the ringer off the night before or program her phone number to go instantly to the machine.
She may think her call is the reason h... (read in full...)
Confident and Carefree People, How do you do it?
Q. By all of the people I know I am considered to be a really funny guy and really talkative person who is very confident. Which around people I know I am but when meeting new people despite usually trying to be talkative I let nerves get the better of ...
A. 23 December 2011: When we feel shy most of our attention is directed inward, to ourselves (SELF conscious, INTROverted). When we feel confident and OUTgoing, most of our attention is directed outward.
When you're with friends, you're not spending most of your tim... (read in full...)
I read my wife's journal and now I am tormented by it
Q. I have been with my wife for 9 years, married for 6. I was a virgin when we met. She told me she had been with three men. Considering her great beauty and how many men were after her I didn't think that was so bad, especially because she is three...
A. 23 December 2011: Cereberus,
As flattered as I am to think I come across as impervious to pain, nothing could be further from the truth. I’ve had experience with retroactive jealousy from both sides of the equation so I have a pretty solid grasp of the situatio... (read in full...)
I read my wife's journal and now I am tormented by it
Q. I have been with my wife for 9 years, married for 6. I was a virgin when we met. She told me she had been with three men. Considering her great beauty and how many men were after her I didn't think that was so bad, especially because she is three...
A. 22 December 2011: Male anon:
What defines a woman is what is between her ears, not who might been between her legs. The OP's wife is the same person now as she was before he read her journal. She had the same habits, the same interests, the same dreams and ambition... (read in full...)
I can't make my b/f cum without his assistance
Q. Ok this is really embarrasing for me but I really need help I'm desperate :(. I can't really make my boyfriend come without his assistance ( him thrusting more etc ). When we're in the middle of doing something if I,m doing it I can't finish ...
A. 22 December 2011: Alcohol can certainly affect one's performance, but that applies to him as well, no? I think it unfair of your boyfriend to lay all this at your doorstep.
You've heard that saying 'We're responsible for our own orgasm'? What do you think that mea... (read in full...)
Why do girls only want to be friends?
Q. Why do girls only want to be friends. im tried of being led on by them and it sucks. i want a girl that will like me for a long time someone that will care about me.please help...
A. 21 December 2011: Friends like and care about you.
Besides lack of romantic interest, another common reason girls state they want to be friends is to ensure a guy likes them for who they are, not what's in their pants.
Another is to have some control over the... (read in full...)
I read my wife's journal and now I am tormented by it
Q. I have been with my wife for 9 years, married for 6. I was a virgin when we met. She told me she had been with three men. Considering her great beauty and how many men were after her I didn't think that was so bad, especially because she is three...
A. 21 December 2011: Go on your own first. It's better to sort your thoughts out before talking to your wife.
To be honest, I think this is really very sad that you'd have to seek therapy for something like this. Like I said earlier, we women have been dealing ... (read in full...)
I read my wife's journal and now I am tormented by it
Q. I have been with my wife for 9 years, married for 6. I was a virgin when we met. She told me she had been with three men. Considering her great beauty and how many men were after her I didn't think that was so bad, especially because she is three...
A. 20 December 2011: OP, men have been known to inflate and embellish accounts of their sexual encounters. Yet despite this, and the fact that you don't even know these men, you and the male anonymous below are acting on the assumption that whatever a man says about a ... (read in full...)
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