Planning to try new things in our sex life, but how can I feel more confident?
Q. So I posted about really liking my FWB and we have had an open chat about what we both want and we're going to stick with each other which has made me really happy. But now he wants to take things a lot further, not relationship, but more erotic ...
A. 3 October 2012: Ok, that's better then. ... (read in full...)
20 girls and not one accepted his offer of a date
Q. A sociable guy of age 23-24 for 3-6 months approached upto 20 girls fo date and not even one accep him! What might be the reasons and what is the posible solution? The guy is tall, handsome, sociable and humble. Ur a advice will be of help tan...
A. 3 October 2012: Very little information to go on here.
How exactly did he approach these women? And where? What did he suggest as a first date?
What type of women were they? Shy, sheltered women or more worldly and outgoing? Did he approach them individuall... (read in full...)
Planning to try new things in our sex life, but how can I feel more confident?
Q. So I posted about really liking my FWB and we have had an open chat about what we both want and we're going to stick with each other which has made me really happy. But now he wants to take things a lot further, not relationship, but more erotic ...
A. 3 October 2012: Hang on a minute...you will take 'the role' first to prove your trust? You mean you will allow him to restrain you first to prove to him that you trust him?
That is NOT how it works, my dear. If he wants to play with handcuffs that badly, HE can b... (read in full...)
The school books I need cost more than my allowance
Q. Hey everyone, This is not a relationship question, I just want to know if this is right. Ok my dad passed away like 6 months ago, and I don't have no parents with me, I live with a guardian. I receive social security every month, i get $400 a mon...
A. 2 October 2012: That's a good point, Cindy, about it being an optional class. While I don't consider school books extras in the way that nail polish or designer jeans are extras, they aren't necessities the way food and shelter is.
If this is the worst izzygurl... (read in full...)
He suggested this game, but I don't know what will work. How am I supposed to convince my boyfriend to have sex?!
Q. my boyfriend wants me to convince him to have sex to see how convincing I can be. He wants it to be a game. I know he does, because he told me he wants to see if i can convince him to as well. I need help I've tried different things, but no luck....
A. 2 October 2012: I like SVC's game better!
... (read in full...)
Planning to try new things in our sex life, but how can I feel more confident?
Q. So I posted about really liking my FWB and we have had an open chat about what we both want and we're going to stick with each other which has made me really happy. But now he wants to take things a lot further, not relationship, but more erotic ...
A. 2 October 2012: Before I answer this question, how long have you know this friend with benefits and when did you become involved with him? How often do you see him and when you do, do you always have sex? How old is he? What, if any, experience does he claim to ... (read in full...)
The school books I need cost more than my allowance
Q. Hey everyone, This is not a relationship question, I just want to know if this is right. Ok my dad passed away like 6 months ago, and I don't have no parents with me, I live with a guardian. I receive social security every month, i get $400 a mon...
A. 2 October 2012: I agree with SVC. The money your guardian receives is to support YOU, which means she coughs up the $44 for the book. It is NOT her personal slush fund or a special bonus she gets for being a nice person. School supplies should not come out of your ... (read in full...)
Seperated for 3 months, both had sex partners, how do we move on???
Q. I need some serious opinions. I have been with my husband for 6 years. Rocky for last two years...since we got married. A year into the marriage my husband told me he had a one night stand. He told me a million times it was a mistake and he ...
A. 2 October 2012: kc100 said it perfectly.
... (read in full...)
Should I break up with b/f who swears he didn't put up a profile on a dating website? I know he did it!
Q. My friend and I were looking at plenty of fish dating site today because we were really bored in work I've never been on there but she said she knew loads of people on there with cringey photos and stuff they'd written about themselves. Well I came ...
A. 2 October 2012: Yes, you should break up with him over this. Obviously he is shocked, humiliated and scared to have been caught, which is why he's lying and all over the map.
There is nothing to fix here. You'll be so much happier on your own.
... (read in full...)
Should I tell my Fiance I made-out with another women?
Q. Hello, feeling like a piece of crap and could use some advice. I've been with my fiance for 10yrs and we are planning our marriage here soon, and actually just had our engagement party with our friends last week. I love her dearly, we are m...
A. 1 October 2012: Ask yourself what you would do were the situation reversed and your girlfriend had a heavy kissing and groping session with another man. I mean this not as a condemnation but as a sincere question to ask yourself. That might give you some idea of ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend's behaviour normal?
Q. I just wanted opinions to see if my boyfriends behaviour is normal or not. so I left his house around 12 this morning to meet my best girlfriend for a coffee and I told him that i MIGHT go to a shop to look for bridesmaid shoes as my friend a...
A. 1 October 2012: I'm with the others, specially Honeypie. You did nothing wrong. Your boyfriend's behaviour is definitely not normal. Seventeen calls is excessive to say the least.
He wasn't worried about your safety. If he was, he would have called family, ... (read in full...)
If you won money, how much would you give your guardian?
Q. Hey everyone, This is not a relationship question, it's a "what if" question. Ok, let's say you are 17 years old and you've been living with somebody like a guardian since you were 16, you don't have any parents, and you pay the person $300 ever...
A. 1 October 2012: Absolutely NOT half. Not even close.
If you've had a great relationship with this guardian, they've been kind to you and they're struggling to make ends meet, then you could give them a one time gift of $1000, but that is ALL. No one else gets any... (read in full...)
I am going crazy obsessing over the thought of watching my wife with another woman.
Q. My wife and I have been together for over six years and have a wonderful family and life together. We are deeply in love and I would like to think be together forever. We have a great and fulfilling sex. One of the issues early in our relationship ...
A. 1 October 2012: Do NOT surprise her with something like this. It's not fair to her and it's a horrible thing to do to an invited guest. I'll come back to the guest in a moment.
And do NOT post her picture on ANY sites whatsoever. It feels too close to pimping ... (read in full...)
Why is he lying to me if he isn't doing anything wrong?
Q. I am in a new relationship, have been with the guy for about ten months now. It has recently turned into a long distance thing which is fine as I have done it before. I trust him.. or at least I did. He is gud friends with a girl, which is fine, ex...
A. 1 October 2012: YouWish has summed it up perfectly. Whether he is cheating now or might one day is almost irrelevant. He would rather disappoint you than disappoint her. And, he's long distance. Those two factors alone are sufficient reasons to walk away.
Discu... (read in full...)
An overprotective mother, how can I get her to be reasonable?
Q. Hello. My question deals with an overprotective mother. I am 22, going on 23 in 3 months. I never dated in high school because of how she over reacts about boys. It was just easier to not date then to constantly argue with her. So yesterday, I ...
A. 1 October 2012: As has been pointed out, your mother vented in the privacy of her own home in the presence of a very small circle of those closest to you, who know you well, and love you. Not strangers whose opinion of you would be formed by her comments.
The f... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's son is the first priority in his life and I hate myself when I get jealous
Q. I'm sorry I'm not very good at explaining stuff. I'll do the bast I can: My boyfriend has a 6 year old son and they have been the only real family eachother have had since the kid was born. My boyfriend's parents have never really been in his life...
A. 1 October 2012: I think you need to feel secure and special, not necessarily number one.
Analogies help me so here's one for you: Imagine you and a friend won the jackpot in separate lotteries. You won $5,000,000.00 and she won $10,000,000.00. Would you be disap... (read in full...)
Do I keep it to myself or tell my sister? My sister's husband of nine years told me he is having an affair
Q. Yesterday was the worst day of my life. My sister's husband of nine years told me he is having an affair,he trusted me enough to tell me, but I feel like I'm betraying my sister. Please help me what should I do????? My sister also has a life treat...
A. 30 September 2012: I like SVC's suggestion. Was your sister's illness caused by the affair (a serious STD)? Is it terminal? Will treatment cure her or prolong her life and ease her suffering? You don't have to tell me. I was trying to determine if knowing would be... (read in full...)
I have concerns about returning to my FWB. What should I do though? He wants to resume, but his past actions concern me
Q. Hi I realise there is a lot of questions asked about this thank you for any answers in advance I just need some opinions on this situation I have been in a FWB for 18 months now he asked me if it could just be me and him sleeping together and not ...
A. 30 September 2012: Let's use an analogy here. Everyone who has hair uses a hairbrush. We all have preference, and some brushes are better than others. We use them frequently and depend upon them. However if we lose them, it would be a bummer, not a catastrophe. The... (read in full...)
I've pointed out the red flags but feel like my g/f never gives me a clear answer
Q. So homecoming is coming up. I'm not going, i dont really like dances. But my gf is, and im really scared she going to be dancing on other girls since i'm not their with her. My friends keep telling me ,they see her playing with other girls. She ...
A. 30 September 2012: Talk to her about the other girls? You mean the other girls with whom she MIGHT cheat? Besides telling you she won't cheat on you there really isn't anything else she can say, is there?
The only way she can prove she won't cheat is by not cheating... (read in full...)
In a FWB relationship should I be angry that he stood me up?
Q. I have been seeing a guy for quite a short time. It started out as a one night stand but we have been seeing each others again after that. It is clear it is nothing else than for sex, which is fine with me since I am recently single and not really ...
A. 30 September 2012: When you say he stood you up, you mean you had an arrangement and he just didn't show up or did he cancel ahead of time with a lame excuse?
I think common courtesy applies to any relationship, be it formal or intimiate. So if he just didn't s... (read in full...)
Messed up real bad! Need help and advice.
Q. Hello! I am new to this but I am trying to get all the help that I can get at this point. Well here it goes. Four days ago my fiancee and I got into a little fight at a wedding and left there right away which turned into a bigger fight down the ...
A. 28 September 2012: You're welcome. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend asked me if he could be friends with his ex girlfriend who he was deeply in love with
Q. We are engaged to be married and have been seeing each other for 3 years. His last ex-girlfriend dumped him badly. He was deeply in love with her. When we got together after their break-up which was only two months later, he called me her na...
A. 28 September 2012: If I asked for permission to spit on your kitchen floor, would I get credit for at least asking first?
I absolutely agree with you. His request was inappropriate, and bold coming from someone who insisted you have no contact with your exes.
... (read in full...)
My friend keeps devouring my food...help!
Q. My friend Bridget drives me absolutely crazy with her eating habits because she is almost ALWAYS sponging off my food. It doesn’t matter if she just had a meal as long as food is around she always wants a bite or a sip or a few of whatever I’m ...
A. 27 September 2012: As the others have said the first thing and probably the best thing you can do is stop offering her food. At least not quite so often. When you offer it frequently you send the message that you don't mind doing it.
Last sentence in your first pa... (read in full...)
Messed up real bad! Need help and advice.
Q. Hello! I am new to this but I am trying to get all the help that I can get at this point. Well here it goes. Four days ago my fiancee and I got into a little fight at a wedding and left there right away which turned into a bigger fight down the ...
A. 27 September 2012: Owning your role in this is the right thing to do but before you get too caught up in punishing yourself and grovellnig for forgiveness, remember that your girlfriend has some smartening up to do too.
It sounds like she too has trouble handling... (read in full...)
I'm breaking up with my boyfriend because I found him on dating websites
Q. hi, not going to be a long question but, i found out my boyfriend of nearly a year has been going on dating websites. He knows i know now and i told him im leaving him, but hes begging me not to saying he loves me and all that waffle, honestly im ...
A. 27 September 2012: Dump him. Your boyfriend is seeking out other women. There is no other reasonable explanation.
You are not jumping to conclusions. You're not mistaken. You know what you saw and we agree with you.
... (read in full...)
Should I run or is he just insecure from being divorced twice?
Q. I'm frustrated and have told my boyfriend this on many an occasion. He is smart but I sometimes feel he is trying to outsmart me and tries to make me feel it's just in my head that I think he has too many issues and is clingy. He insists I answer...
A. 26 September 2012: Like Tisha, what alarmed me the most was his joking about harming your kids (I'm assuming that since it wasn't the first flaw you mentioned but it was the first one in Tisha's response). Given the total picture, I am inclined to believe that is NO ... (read in full...)
I no longer feel that I can trust my LDR boyfriend. Should I break up with him?
Q. Hi everyone! I am on a long distance relationship for 3 years, I really love this guy to the point we were getting engaged and such. He hid from me the fact he went with a female friend to a concert, even after I confronted him. He delet...
A. 26 September 2012: I think the distance is getting to him, he's possibly outgrowing the relationship and it does seem he's been detaching lately. Not that he is necesarily cheating, but if ths goes on any longer that will become a strong possibility.
My advice i... (read in full...)
Am I being set up?
Q. Just need to know that i'm not being set up by an amature. He lives at home and is 5yrs older than i am and to adding to the scenario he has never been w/anyone. first time out I had called him. things moved too fast and already L word was in the ...
A. 26 September 2012: This one has my antena up. I don't think he is a con man, but a nester. A con man would be more cunning and subtle. This one is desperate and clumsy.
I think you can figure out for yourself what a nester is. He is in too much of a hurry to play ... (read in full...)
Former supervisor bullied me and now is trying to stop me from making a grievance against her
Q. Hi, I started working at this new place in November last year as my husband lost his job so I had to leave my current part time job to do a full time job. I got on well with everyone apart from my supervisor who from day 1 never liked me or...
A. 26 September 2012: You're very welcome and thank you for the follow up.
Remember, even if she doesn't get the punishment you (and all of us here) thinks she deserves, the fact that her conduct has come to the attention of management, is being investigated, that emp... (read in full...)
Former supervisor bullied me and now is trying to stop me from making a grievance against her
Q. Hi, I started working at this new place in November last year as my husband lost his job so I had to leave my current part time job to do a full time job. I got on well with everyone apart from my supervisor who from day 1 never liked me or...
A. 25 September 2012: Accept the invitation to make a statement about her conduct. Do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. This is a golden opportunity that many people don't get.
The tide is turning against your supervisor. She sees it, she's obviously terrified and knows yo... (read in full...)
In a round about way b/f called me a whore. Am I wrong to be upset?
Q. I basically want to check whether I'm over-reacting or not but this is what happened. I live with my boyfriend and sometimes, when I call him up from outside when he's at home, asking him what he's been doing, he often says he has some girl over and ...
A. 25 September 2012: Yes, I think you're over reacting. You could have turned the joke around on him. And NOT by saying that you were paying the guy. That would leave you open to some hint that the only way you could get a man would be to pay him.
Like the other un... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his child are a pair of spoilt brats!
Q. Okay, so i have been with my bf for two years now, he has a 4 yr old of his own and i have a 6 and 8 yr old. My bf takes his son every weekend and whenever his son is here i dread it, i know i sound horrible but i treat all children the same so if ...
A. 25 September 2012: He didn't realise it was a big deal until now? So he isn't any smarter than his four year old son? He needed all the grown ups around him to spell it out?
This follow up does nothing to change my mind about your ex. It doesn't redeem him at all. ... (read in full...)
Is it ok for a friend to sleep with your FWB?
Q. My very close friend slept with a fwb of mine and has not come out and told me herself. I am so hurt by this, but other people who I have spoken to don’t understand why I should be as bothered as he is only a FWB and therefore he doesn’t mean ...
A. 24 September 2012: I can understand you don't like this new development, but your friends are correct. The whole point of friends with benefits is that you are not his and he is not yours. Otherwise you'd have both chosen to be officially exclusive.
You wouldn't... (read in full...)
Why hasn't real love come my way?
Q. I am looking for a committed relationship but I don't know how.. I am tired of the games,lies, cheating the whole nine yards. i mean I am getting older time is running thin, not that I'm older than dust, but I am 40 now and I think it's time to ...
A. 24 September 2012: If the only men you encounter on blind dates are drunks, druggies and woman beaters then I would take a closer look at the places you meet these men or the friends who introduce you. I've been out on plenty of dates (years ago) and none were ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his child are a pair of spoilt brats!
Q. Okay, so i have been with my bf for two years now, he has a 4 yr old of his own and i have a 6 and 8 yr old. My bf takes his son every weekend and whenever his son is here i dread it, i know i sound horrible but i treat all children the same so if ...
A. 24 September 2012: His son is obviously an unhappy kid, but you're not the cause and you're not in a position to fix it, so it's best to have nothing to do with them. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his child are a pair of spoilt brats!
Q. Okay, so i have been with my bf for two years now, he has a 4 yr old of his own and i have a 6 and 8 yr old. My bf takes his son every weekend and whenever his son is here i dread it, i know i sound horrible but i treat all children the same so if ...
A. 24 September 2012: Too harsh?? It's a testament to your patience that you didn't chuck your pinhead ex boyfriend and his asshole son out the window. (Yes, it is possible to be an asshole at such a young age).
I second AuntyBimBim's advice except about the ground r... (read in full...)
Can a relationship work when both families are so different?
Q. Can a relationship work when you're families are so different? Me and my boyfriend are in love and have been seeing each other for a while now, but his family don't accept me since I'm not the same religion as him, and if my family knew he wasnt ...
A. 24 September 2012: Given your ages there is a chance that this might become a long term thing and as you've already pointed out, when you partner up with someone you're combining lives and everyone in them.
Things will be pretty tough living among people who thin... (read in full...)
Guys, would you have reacted in the same way as my boyfriend to the fact that I am a virgin at 20?
Q. So this guy i'm seeing we were getting really close and things were intense, I wanted to go the whole way but I stopped him and said I can't i'm still a virgin, but told him I want to, just not yet. I'm ready, i'm just not sure yet if I want to...
A. 24 September 2012: I wasn't implying you'd be one of those people, by the way. Just pointing out that giving up one's virginity doesn't give them happiness or their lives meaning. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriends disrespectful past is stopping me from moving on with our future?
Q. My boyfriend has been terrible in the past, staring at other women in public, buying disgusting mens magazines and putting them in plain sight where i could see them and thinking nothing of it, flirting with other girls behind my back and thinking ...
A. 24 September 2012: The male attention you received would only bother him if he thought he might lose something. Either lmao1989 is right in that he knew you'd never leave him or because he kept his options open and he knew he could easily replace you if you left.
... (read in full...)
How can I convince my parents that not getting another dog is the right choice for me?
Q. My rat terrier is 15 years old and I got him when I was 12 years old. It was great having a dog growing up but after he dies, I do not want another dog. My problem is my parents are making a big deal about me not getting another dog after he die...
A. 24 September 2012: I think your parents are concerned, not because of your decision but HOW you communicated that decision to them. They think you're choice is based on grief and fear instead of it being a calm amd rational choice. You may have unwittingly made a big ... (read in full...)
I've given her an ultimatum, him or me. How can we move forward?
Q. folks in need of some expert help basically giving my gf a ultimatum. Choose him or me. il make this quick basically i made the first mistake by flirting with a girl online, but let me explain, this flirtation ment absolutely NOTHING...
A. 24 September 2012: First you're in New Zealand. Now the US. Where will you be tomorrow? Africa?
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-do-we-solve-our-trust-issues.html... (read in full...)
Guys, would you have reacted in the same way as my boyfriend to the fact that I am a virgin at 20?
Q. So this guy i'm seeing we were getting really close and things were intense, I wanted to go the whole way but I stopped him and said I can't i'm still a virgin, but told him I want to, just not yet. I'm ready, i'm just not sure yet if I want to...
A. 24 September 2012: I have friends who were well into their 20's, and 30's when they lost their virginity and it was never as issue. They led fulfilling, active, interesting lives, had many friends and were happy. In all the years I knew them I only learned of their ... (read in full...)
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