I just want out! I've hung on for the sake of the kids
Q. I've been married for 20 years, but Im near the end of my tether with keeping our marriage going. Here are the main problems I have. Trust. She does not trust me, so much so that I cannot engage in normal activities without her thinking I'm seei...
A. 7 June 2009: The first thing I would like to address, are the children and having others besides yourselves watch them for a certain length of time. This is a must process to insure your child’s well being and safety. Just as yourself, her parents control... (read in full...)
I just want out! I've hung on for the sake of the kids
Q. I've been married for 20 years, but Im near the end of my tether with keeping our marriage going. Here are the main problems I have. Trust. She does not trust me, so much so that I cannot engage in normal activities without her thinking I'm seei...
A. 6 June 2009: The human psyche is the hardest thing to maintain with any superiority.
If we could communicate telepathically, or connect and share data between us like a computer, we wouldn’t have problems in relationships. We would also be able to mentally over... (read in full...)
Uncertain about my feelings towards him
Q. Hi, Ok so Ive been with my bf 4 years now. At the beginning everything was perfect. We didnt have our first arguement til we had been together almost 6months and everyone around us couldnt beleive how well we fitted. Even after a a couple years, ...
A. 6 June 2009: Not sure what is going on with you, but you must remain friends and not get his hopes up again: you will destroy him.
Do have any idea as to why you have these feelings? What goes through your head when he tried to hug or kiss you? Finding the ... (read in full...)
Open marriage made me realize I'm no longer in love
Q. I am married and feeling horrible about my marriage. My husband and i have 4 kids and we have dicussed open marriage. I have had 1 partner with in that agreement. He has had none. It has really played a serious role in where i am today. I am i ...
A. 5 June 2009: Without going through what you and your husband have experienced with an open marriage, I think many couples share the same feelings towards each other. I think the problem starts at childhood and through schooling, where key elements to ... (read in full...)
He's a wonderful guy, but I have these insatiable urges
Q. I've been married to a wonderful guy for over 20 years. He always tells me how much he adores me and shows me also in so many ways. He has no idea that I feel the way I do because I also love him and treat him the same way. However, the problem is ...
A. 5 June 2009: Maybe what the two of you need is a second honeymoon, or at least a vacation. Does it seem to much of a routine? I suggest you ponder these feelings, explore them and figure out what is really bothering you. Could even be just plain old hormon... (read in full...)
I have major trust issues with men. How can I overcome this?
Q. I think I have a problem with men. And, I think this problem originates from the way I was taught to perceive men as a child. My father is not a bad man, not compared to a lot of fathers. He provided for his family and gave us the things we needed ...
A. 5 June 2009: Ouch! Your dad is something from out of this world. My step dad was similar, but over time, I learned "so was his dad". Somewhere along the path, those affected have to break through this and create a future fresh from it.
There is nothing you ... (read in full...)
A breach of date protocol?
Q. My boyfriend of four years just asked if I was "interested" in going to a formal party his fraternity is throwing. I said sure, sounds fun. He then proceeds to tell me that tickets are $47. I'd been under the impression that when you ask somebody to ...
A. 5 June 2009: Funny. To be prepared for the future, I suggest you discuss finances. Many marriages fail because of finances. Discuss how each will support each other, and that both will be forthcoming in the facts and be honest, then this will not be a problem ... (read in full...)
Dumped for someone else by my work fling!!
Q. Ive been sleeping with a guy at work but weve never had a relationship because he said he didnt want to commit. I didnt mind I just thought it was a bit of fun at the time nothing serious. Then last month I went on holiday for a week and when I come ...
A. 4 June 2009: I think he said he didn't want to commit because he knew then on that you were not his type for that type of relationship. He pretty much set it up with friends with benefits. Realize it for what it was and even though it may make you mad, just rea... (read in full...)
Problems with ED!
Q. hi need some help with ED, my wife she's very sex active and a lot of times it's not there... is there anything over the counter that could help me thank you, ...
A. 3 June 2009: As noted, have you gone and seen a doctor? If it is health related, then you shouldn't accept any suggestions from us. There can be other issues as well as high blood pressure, over weight and lack of excersize, such as mental. Similar to stage fr... (read in full...)
I want to have sex, but I don't want to end up pregnant!
Q. i am really in love with my bf, i want to have sex but i dont want to be stuck with a baby or abort it. what should i do?...
A. 3 June 2009: Birth control pills is by far the easiest, and you do not have to rely on your boyfriend to do what is right and wear a condom. Will your mom object to you getting birth control? Either that, or your boyfriend must wear a condom, and before t... (read in full...)
Help!!! I don't want to be married any more but am scared to be single...
Q. Hi I don't want to be married any more but I am afraid to be single. It would mean huge financial losses and a free fall but I want to feel what being in love feels like again. We have been married 22 years but it is now an empty love marraige...
A. 2 June 2009: Before you can move on, you need to clear up the past.
Why do you not love your wife anymore?
If a wife is willing to sacrifice for her husband and allow an open marriage, she surely still loves him. I am surprise you do not see this.
Sta... (read in full...)
I'm not a whore... so what is my problem?
Q. Okay, so I'm 14 and I have a huge problem. I'm a flirt. I know it, everyone knows it. There's this cycle I go thru with almost every single guy I've known. 1. I get their number 2. We text and flirt 3. I send pics 4. He stops talking It'...
A. 2 June 2009: First, the age. IF the boys you associate with are near or at your age, then it is normal immaturity.
The problem with flirting, is that after a while, boys/men become confused as to where they stand with you. If you flit in front of them with... (read in full...)
Help!!! I don't want to be married any more but am scared to be single...
Q. Hi I don't want to be married any more but I am afraid to be single. It would mean huge financial losses and a free fall but I want to feel what being in love feels like again. We have been married 22 years but it is now an empty love marraige...
A. 2 June 2009: Clearly you seem torn between what you once had with your wife and what you have now. Would this be correct?
I think many marriages run into this problem, I myself am in it to, except no sex for a year. Mostly, my choice because I feel she hold... (read in full...)
How can I stop her depression from dragging me down?
Q. My girlfriend of 6 months is going through some depression. I've tried all i can to be nice and supportive but she keeps shutting me down, and snapping at me whenever I offer support or anything. She also has been very distant, it takes her hours ...
A. 2 June 2009: If it were a woman asking about her husband, I could give her some insight. But I am having similar problems with my wife, and she is not the type to open up or ask for what she needs. No no!
I have learned that both men and women are very sim... (read in full...)
Sex 101
Q. Hello all! I am really looking for some male help on this one. My boyfriend and I have an amazing sex life. We are pretty open to trying new things but lately things have been a little boring. We have done the role play and used the products, ...
A. 2 June 2009: Hate to say it, but it may not have anything to do with the sex department. What about other aspects of your life? Goals, dreams? Okay, if you want new ideas, how about S and M? Swings that are attached to the ceiling? Maybe two swings? Lit... (read in full...)
I don't know how to help my depressed son
Q. My son is very depressed,and I don't know how can I help him. He was doing drugs before, and We let him move home,as he was in a very bad shape,and he wanted to get better. Now he is much healthier, but he gets really angry, as deep down he is ...
A. 1 June 2009: Well we cannot give up on our kids. I am happy that you are trying to help him. I am afraid that many of us pull threw it and some have a much rougher time. It boils down in part as to not having the appropriate tools to deal with life.
G... (read in full...)
Wife and kids are upset with me, how do I fix it?
Q. My wife and I of 16 hard years have split apart for third time. once almost a year ago, about 4-5 years before then and a few probs way back when. She left the other day with the kids. neither her or the kids will speak to me. I know I am more at ...
A. 1 June 2009: I'm leaning towards RCN's reply.
What were the issues of the past? If you have no idea what is going on with your family, it is impossible to rectify it.
Trying to understand all the emotions women go through at one time is also impossib... (read in full...)
Whats up with the boss?
Q. I have a higher up at work that can be very mean/sarcastic at times. People tell me that is just how he is. when i first started at my job I made a mention of I was stressed so I was going out for a drink. He said "that sounds fun". I didn't ...
A. 1 June 2009: I agree with anonymous, but to be realistic, it could be a whole number of things. You both bring your own personalities to the mix, and it sounds like the two of you are opposites, which may not click.
Based on your post, it sounds like there has ... (read in full...)
How soon is it acceptable to have sex?
Q. How soon into a relationship is it acceptable to have sex? I dont believe in sleeping with someone on a first date, but recently I have been made to feel like I am some sort of freak for not putting out within what is considered to be an ...
A. 1 June 2009: To me, there has to be a mental connection. Physical attraction is already there because this attracted me to her that I engaged in conversation with her, and asked for a date or to meet up. Once I feel it is there, that we will be long term, such ... (read in full...)
Don't know if wife wants a threesome?
Q. been married for 10 years my wife and i watch porn and when three somes are on she gets turned on and i would ask if she likes what she sees and she always says she yes when i ask her if she wants a 3-some she always says i would never do that one ...
A. 1 June 2009: Bringing a third party is always risky. Many relationship have failed after this adventure. You could be setting yourself up for disaster if you really love her and want to keep her. Once you open a woman up to this and she takes hold of it, she ... (read in full...)
9 years and the thrill is gone
Q. I've lived with my girlfriend for 9 years now but im not happy. At first it was great we couldent wate to be together. We lerned new stuf together every day. Now I feal all the bonds and Excitment have gone. I feal as thogh im a taxi service, ...
A. 1 June 2009: You have a real tough situation on your hands. I would ponder that you need to speak up and negotiate each others schedule and duties.
If you have your own interest you wish to pursue, then I suggest you plan on including them, such as taking a cl... (read in full...)
He promised to quit smoking but its been 9 months..how can I not hate it!
Q. well here's the story.. i met him as a smoker.. i did not want to date him because of that but he insisted and insisted and insisted promising that he will quit if i gave him a chance..but he have been together now for 9 months now and he still ...
A. 31 May 2009: I've tried to quit smoking for a number of years. I know my wife doesn't like it, but I feel helpless in kicking the habit. Wish I never started, but of course, it is to late for that.... (read in full...)
My wife admits that she is lazy in bed
Q. The problem is that my wife is lazy in bed (she voluntarily admits that herself). Mostly she just assumes whatever position I like and then I take care of both of us. She says *partly* she is not more active because she needs to concentrate on her ...
A. 31 May 2009: Yes, the engineer part can be a problem, lol! I think you have a real task on your hands. The reason is because you need to understand better her likes and dislikes, and any perceived notions about sex, such as looked down upon as immoral, reli... (read in full...)
Should I leave my husband over his affair?
Q. I need advice, should I leave my husband or stay with him and live in eternal pain after his affair, which happened last summer? I will never forget what he did to me and our daughter. I found a text from his tutor at work saying night babe i love ...
A. 31 May 2009: Clearly you two need to sit down and discuss boundaries together. First you need to calm down a bit so that clear minds can communicate without defenses.
I understand that this is a kick in the wind pipes when he receives such messages and he defe... (read in full...)
I want my wife to date others but stay with me!
Q. A litte history: I have been married for many years. The past few I have been not performing well in the bedroom to the point we do not have sex anymore. Her libido has increased but I just dont have the desire for sex. My doctor is trying to help ...
A. 30 May 2009: I think you should refrain from pushing her away and instead work on yourself, I am sure she will wait for you.
You don't state what type of doctor, and I am not sure if you think it is chemical or not, but may I suggest a sex therapist or sexol... (read in full...)
Do men like older virgins?
Q. Men and Older Virgins? I know most men are into young women - especially if they are still chaste and virginal - but what do men think of older women who are still virgins? For example women in their 30s or even 40s as there are still some of us ab...
A. 30 May 2009: Being a virigin is one thing that could show she has not been in and out of too many relationships, meaning she is mentally stable.
For women in there 30's, and especially in there 40's, some men will wonder why this is. Is she hard to get alon... (read in full...)
Should I ignore him eyeing up other women?
Q. I have a new partner, every time we are out, i notice him ogling other women who are younger, and thinner. He says he finds me gorgeous and attractive. So why does he do it? last night he spent all evening eyeing up women, and practically...
A. 30 May 2009: I wouldn't feel to secure if my wife oogled other guys, so I think we have same responses to what he is doing to you.
If I were you, I'd ask him to search for a real deep reason for his action and then explain it clearly to you so you unde... (read in full...)
My husband seems to be starting his mid-life crisis
Q. My husband ,after years of neglect,started to change like crazy. He works out,looks at himself in the mirror, and very snappy with me. He wants to buy new shirts, and pants, he never ever wanted it before. He has a weird expression,on his face,a...
A. 30 May 2009: A guy can't buy new underwear without causing alarm? Poster, please provide more information: Why has he been neglected? By whom? Anything else going on in his life besides what you see at home? How is his work? What does he do for a liv... (read in full...)
I'm slowly developing a hatred towards women...
Q. A girl that I've been crushing over for about a year just rejected me. In my lifetime I've developed crushes over many girls and not one of them ever said yes, I can't fucking take rejection any more, I can't even feel the pain, I'm slowly ...
A. 30 May 2009: It is more natural to get along with your own sex then the opposite sex. At your age, and the modern times today, which is quite different then when I was your age, being that girls are more educated about boys and are more independent, whereas,... (read in full...)
Sex and virginity
Q. hey, ok I have a million questions, but ill ask this one question that I have had in my head for a while. im a virgin and I always think guys want to have sex with me because of that but I also think once I tell a guy im a virgin they don't want to ...
A. 30 May 2009: Guys in general, will want sex. This is almost a given.
For being a virgin: some guys will feel special if it is they who has sex with you first; there will be guys who have had many girls and virginity only means they got it first before a... (read in full...)
My wife enjoyed sex with her ex but she isnt interested when it comes to me!
Q. i wanna know how do i get my wife to want me sexually cause she never wants to have sex with me i mean we do it but very often she never wants it just me or even when i ask her she gets mad somtimes when she gives it to me she tells me to hurry up ...
A. 29 May 2009: I hate to say it, but I think you are wasting your time.
As a man, I know how important having sex with your wife is, and if she will participate only grudgingly, then this will not be exciting for yourself either, because you will feel reje... (read in full...)
We're sexually incompatible
Q. during sex my boyfreinds ercetion seems to get worse and he keeps insisting that he is erect no matter how hard he tries i have now lost interset in having sex.i say lets try different positions but hes quite set in his ways , he likes playing with ...
A. 28 May 2009: I think what he is doing is trying to stimulate himself through manipulating his nipples, as we guys believe this works for women, I have heard it works for guys, though I haven't experienced that myself, only one girlfriend attempted this on me, ... (read in full...)
We're sexually incompatible
Q. during sex my boyfreinds ercetion seems to get worse and he keeps insisting that he is erect no matter how hard he tries i have now lost interset in having sex.i say lets try different positions but hes quite set in his ways , he likes playing with ...
A. 28 May 2009: A sex therapist might be able to help him.
If he senses your displeasure, this may add to his frustrations of not performing to please you. Even though you might already be doing this, it won't hurt in repeating this: please try to be a little more... (read in full...)
Why do men want sex from their girlfriend?
Q. Why men in love want to have sex with their woman? My boyfriend keeps telling that he really wants to make love to me. And that he misses me when we are not together...Its not that he pressures me to have sex with me but he keeps mentioning about ...
A. 28 May 2009: I meant to say late "teens". Sorry to have left that off.... (read in full...)
Tips on what men like in bed....
Q. Ok I have been with my boyfriend for a good while now and this is stupid but I figured I could get tips and advice here... So anyhow I was wanting to know what are somethings men like while in bed! Our sex life is wonderful and full of passion but I ...
A. 28 May 2009: Okay (sigh). The threesome, bad idea and good for you.
The pictures, again, another bad idea.
Stick to your guns girl, and hold him up to your morals and don't let him undermine them, okay! You sound like a real sweetie. For him? He is beginnin... (read in full...)
Why do men want sex from their girlfriend?
Q. Why men in love want to have sex with their woman? My boyfriend keeps telling that he really wants to make love to me. And that he misses me when we are not together...Its not that he pressures me to have sex with me but he keeps mentioning about ...
A. 28 May 2009: I agree with "eyeswideopen".
For future reference though, men do like having sex with their girl to bring them closer. This at least is his perception and a part of a need men have to feeling close to his girl. Women usually require a differen... (read in full...)
Should I expect more than this?
Q. Hi I have been down a bit for the past while over my boyfriends friends and family. I feel like I dont fit in with them no matter how hard I try. The friends are very laddy and sometimes dont say hello to me - they rarely ask how I am and usually ...
A. 28 May 2009: I think you need to get the inside scoop. Talk to your boyfriend about it. Maybe you are coming off in some way that they are reserved. Maybe everyone knos that you are highly intelligent and they can't compete with someone like this. it could ... (read in full...)
Tips on what men like in bed....
Q. Ok I have been with my boyfriend for a good while now and this is stupid but I figured I could get tips and advice here... So anyhow I was wanting to know what are somethings men like while in bed! Our sex life is wonderful and full of passion but I ...
A. 28 May 2009: Men like a routine. We do not like the idea of always having to changing things up, it becomes burdonsome after a while. If things are going well, then I'd resume them the way they are. Now if there is something you would like to open doors up... (read in full...)
Is this cheating? Should I tell him? Please help!
Q. I met someone and we spent about two-three weeks hanging out and eventually being intimate, then that person left to travel for a few months. During that time we spoke on the phone every day, and at one point sort of verified a commitment to one ...
A. 28 May 2009: Consider it a wake up call to be on alert to your feelings, and others motives. Nothing happened sexually, and you should be proud of yourself of the achievement under the circumstance.
Don't let it get to you, relax and let it go. You were swim... (read in full...)
Follow my head? Or follow my heart?
Q. myself and partner have recently split up due to his paranoia,behaviour and attitude towards me,i went out saturday night and got talking to this guy he was very nice a real gentleman even sang to me which suprised me i was really flattered.he gave ...
A. 28 May 2009: Now I know there was a popular song in the 60's that said "love the one your with", but personally, I found the meaning and suggestion to be wreckless.
Keeping it friends only (dinner okay) for a little longer I think would be in your best int... (read in full...)
Broke up and now she wants the FWB
Q. I posted a question earlier saying that my ex GF dumped me almost two months ago, she starts talking to me again recently, and she wants to hang out. We talked last night and she says she isn't ready for a relationship with anyone at the moment, but ...
A. 28 May 2009: The final decision will have to be made based on your own feelings, moral beliefs.
If she did something terrible, though you still have feelings for her, this could rattle your sense of stability, knowing that you may not be the only one with bene... (read in full...)
Worried about getting braces!
Q. Sorry if this is really long and bores you but I really need some advice. I've had a lisp since I've first learned how to talk, well it isn't a lisp it's with my t's and d's and I use the roof of my mouth to say them and not the back of my teeth but ...
A. 28 May 2009: Depending on the type of braces worn, yes, they can create speech lisps. This is only because the brace interferres with the tongue and teeth.
I think you will agree that after the prescribed amount of time of wearing the brace and they come off,... (read in full...)
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