Is drunken fumbling meaningful?
Q. Does he like me or was it because we were both drunk? Guy in my class invited me to his birthday drink up with a couple of his mates.I was the only girl. Didn't mind, we're good friends( forgot to mention i kinda fancy him!) So we got drunk at ...
A. 19 December 2011: Neither of you should be getting drunk or high.
Stay away from situations where that's going to happen.
Meet boys in sober contexts. Most boys will want to have sex with you if you will let them. But they won't want to be your bf if you a... (read in full...)
How do I get a girlfriend? Advice needed!
Q. How do i get a girlfriend? I am in all boys junior collage and i hardly get to meet girls. And i don't know how to chat with girls. What can i do to get a girlfriend?...
A. 19 December 2011: Are you going on to higher ed when you graduate ? If so make sure you go to a mixed sex place. Meanwhile do what others suggest in terms of activities where both sexes participate but also use your time at junior coll to cultivate your mi... (read in full...)
Girlfriend says that she loves me but that we will be happy with others?
Q. my girlfriend says that she loves me but she just thinks that we will both be happy with different people and that we just dont realize this yet!! whats that supposed to mean ! i love her like crazy!! ...
A. 19 December 2011: She does not want to be your exclusive girlfriend - she just is too shy to spell it out in words of few syllables.
Take the hint and see other girls.
Enjoy ! [ Report back on your findings.]
... (read in full...)
Should I Do as my heart tells me and marry him then start this long distance thing?
Q. Hello everyone and happy Xmas in advance :) So, my bf proposed to me and asked me to marry him in Sept. Which qould be wow! if he hadn't just moved abroad for work (2hr plane ride). I cannot leave my job over here at all. All I can do is go be ...
A. 19 December 2011: It's not possible to advise without you being a whole lot more specific about what job he does and what job you do [ ? that allows you to be off for six months of the year ??].
Also whether you have had other relationships and so on.
... (read in full...)
B/f wants to move in together in a year, how do I know if its what I really want?
Q. Just curious: my boyfriend and I made "plans" to move to another city together to attend the same college. Lately he's been hinting more and more that he really wants to go through with it. He says things like "i am gonna need a roommate you know ...
A. 19 December 2011: You obviously [ except to yourself ] DON't want it.
Otherwise you would not be asking the question.
So work out some way to let him down gently......the longer you postpone doing so the more you will hurt him [ and he sounds a nice g... (read in full...)
I don't want my one night stand to be a one night stand!
Q. A year ago at Christmas time I met an interesting man at a party, there as an instant click, spent the evening chatting and flirting and got a cab home together (along with my sister) but he never asked for my number before hopping out at his place. ...
A. 19 December 2011: Bottom line is you had a great night of it so there's nothing to regret.
Maybe he doesn't want to see you again but still he didn't promise undying love did he ? He just promised loads of penis-in-vagina enjoyment and as you describe it he d... (read in full...)
Would he cheat if he had a chance to?
Q. me and my boyfriend are having some problems at the moment. he has been messahing other girls asking for nacked pics and chatting other girls up he says it werent him but i dont thinl i believe him. we have a lil girl together and thought we were ...
A. 19 December 2011: if he says it was not him messaging them how do you know it was ?
If you have absolute proof he has been asking other girls for pics you can only ask HIM what he needs from you that he feels he is not getting.
... (read in full...)
B/f embarrassed me in front of his friends. Should we talk about it again?
Q. I dont know whether this is a dumpable offence or not.... I was invited to my boyfriends house christmas dinner, and i was meeting some friends i had not yet met before, so i was trying hard to make an effort for him as you do, and during dinne...
A. 19 December 2011: This question lacks all kind of necessary info : eg are you or are you not in some sort of bf / gf relationship with him ? specifically are you having sex with him AT ALL ? and if so is it on a regular basis ? [ how often ? ] and is it meant ... (read in full...)
Live with family or live with boyfriend?
Q. I promise it's a quick read, if a bit long! This is a two part question: Part 1: My parents are asking me to pay for bills now that I just graduated and got a job (I make $25,000 as a receptionist). I would be okay with that but 1) ...
A. 15 December 2011: FIRST of all you need to stop talking and thinking in airy fairy ABSTRACT terms and look at the HARD NUMBERS. 1] What is your actual take home pay after any deductions ? 2] What sum per month are your parents requesting you to pay ? ... (read in full...)
2 months in and I don't feel like I'm falling for her. What is holding me back?
Q. I'm feeling confused and I don't think that's a good sign... I've been dating a girl for nearly 2 months now (not long, I know). She really is lovely and we have so much in common, but for reasons I can't understand, I just don't feel like I'm ...
A. 15 December 2011: I think you really need to provide some explanation as to how or why you got off with one another as bf and gf in the first place : usually there has to be either sexual attraction [ you get hard in your pants when you are with her and can't wait ... (read in full...)
What can I do in bed to drive my bf wild?
Q. I've been seeing this guy for a while and I always think of all the things I want to do to him like tie him up and blindfold him so that I can do whatever I want with him. I alluded that I had something I wanted to try out the next time I saw him ...
A. 15 December 2011: I don't think there are that many men that would actually want their female partner 'to take charge'.
If you think he might be one of the minority you could just ask him what his deepest and most secret sexual fantasies and desires are - ... (read in full...)
I don't want to seem to clingy so if he doesn't text me, when would it be okay for me to text him?
Q. Hi, this question may seem a little silly but as Ive never experienced this before I need some advice. Well I met a guy and we exchanged numbers, I sent him a text yesterday and we had a little conversation but at the end he sent a heart and I di...
A. 15 December 2011: My suggestion would be a] text him with an invite to a lunch somewhere [ much less threatening than dinner ] ; and b] if you can organise for one or two other ppl to be there also even better [ because it reduces the tension but you can ... (read in full...)
He's frustrated. I'm unhappy. What could be causing my Bf to suddenly get erectile dysfunction? It's never happened before.
Q. My and I boyfriend have been together for 4 months now, and recently we've had a problem with him staying hard during sex. I'm on birth control so we never use condoms but it's just so weird because during foreplay or oral sex he stays full on hard...
A. 15 December 2011: Well it's v unlikely - but not impossible - to be some kind of physical problem but it would be worth checking out if he has med coverage.
Plus the doc could prescribe Viagra or similar to be tried for a couple of weeks.
Thing is once... (read in full...)
How can I stop being bitchy?
Q. I've been really bitchy lately and its really making my boyfriend upset..its all because I've been unhappy about the place that we live in. I'm sooo fed up with our roomates! Their so filthy and lazy and they have nasty animal that they won't clean ...
A. 15 December 2011: Forget any ideas of changing their behavior thru discussion : it ain't going to happen.
However you do it you have to give notice the pair of you and find somewhere else - maybe in a less desirable part of town - where you can be just the two ... (read in full...)
I have sexual feelings for men as well as women, am I bi?
Q. I am 18 and have always had some sexual feelings towards men as well as women. I assumed everybody goes through this as a teenager, although the feelings are still there. I am sure I will be marrying a woman eventually as my feeling for females is ...
A. 15 December 2011: You say you 'often dream about [ men ] '.
Is that more so than about women ?
It seems to me your best option would be to try to meet another young man with a view to a sexual encounter of some kind and see how the reality [ as opposed to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend pressures me to have sex and I hate it
Q. My boyfriend always wants sex and I hate sex more than anything. Is it normal for me to feel so guilty for saying no. he gives me this rude attitude after I tell him my answer, helpppp I dont know what to do. I have talked to him about it a ...
A. 11 December 2011: It would be normal for him to want sex to point of orgasm at least two or three times a day.
You're entitled to say no thanks of course but then you just [ both of you ] have to accept that you are mutually incompatible and move on with no hard ... (read in full...)
Any advice on how to overcome shyness and low self esteem?
Q. hi, so i fear i have social anxiety , i am very shy , no self confidence in anything i do and very low self esteem and i hate the way i look. i dont go out (besides work mon-fri) ive kinda lost touch with my mates from school. we've all drifted ...
A. 11 December 2011: You must have SOME general interests outside of work [ what work btw ?].
You need to make time evenings / weekends to get out of the house and devote some time to them.
It would give you more confidence to buff up so join a mixed gym and wo... (read in full...)
Is he flirting with me or are his comments harmless jokes?
Q. Does this man find me attractive or not? I'm not interested in him, but i'm just curious, as i can't understand why he says these things if he doesn't. He once said " There's not many people who would kick you out of bed " , and that must mean som...
A. 11 December 2011: If you are 'not interested in him' why are you even paying attention ?
... (read in full...)
My girlfriend cheated on me with another woman
Q. I'm a 21 year old guy about to graduate college. I found out my ex cheated on me with another girl and she claims that she was just curious, then she was begging for my forgiveness. I just ended up forgiving her, which was within the week of finding ...
A. 11 December 2011: She was just experimenting maybe but in my view you also need to do a bit of 'playing the field' before settling down into one -supposedly forever - relationship / marriage.
On reflection she prob did you both a favor.
Tell her you're going... (read in full...)
Should I pursue a woman in an open relationship?
Q. I met this girl a few months ago and we really clicked. All the vibes were great and we are really close. So close that shes my neighbor! The only problem is, shes in an open relationship with this guy who is in the navy. He doesnt get discharg...
A. 11 December 2011: If he can make her cry from 3,000 miles away what's he going to do to you when he catches up with you ??
Sail full steam ahead out of this danger zone ! There's other fish in the sea so stay healthy enough to swim around looking for them.
... (read in full...)
Am I too optimistic about rekindling a relationship with my ex-boyfriend?
Q. I feel like I either have the opportunity of a lifetime or am just fooling myself, for the second time, by being too idealistic. Here's the situation: Two months ago, my boyfriend dumped me. His reasons were that he wanted more sex than time an...
A. 11 December 2011: I would suggest that the questions you are raising in YOUR OWN MIND are pertinent.
Question is : why don't you have a full, open discussion with HIM in which you try to guauge honestly what he thinks about all these things.
For starters ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is too shy when it comes to sex
Q. Hey guys. I've been with my girlfriend for a while now. It's nearly been two years and she's way tooooo innocent. Like i dont mind it but it halts us from advancing from anything. Like if i try initiate dirty talk, she would immediately reply with ...
A. 11 December 2011: You don't say how old she is - but assuming she is the same age as you she clearly is not ready for sex. [ Or maybe she just doesn't fancy you ! Either way....]
Therefore it's not really right for you to keep on at her about it. FAIR ENO... (read in full...)
I can't compete sexually with my wife's former lover
Q. My wife's last lover had a bigger penis, greater stamina and could please her with vaginal intercourse. I feel so inadequate and don't know why I should make any more pathetic attempts. Any advice?...
A. 11 December 2011: Far too little info here to be able to hazard any suggestions:
1] Who says all this ? Your wife ? When did she say it and in what context ? Is she frquently comparing your penis to her ex's ??
2] How long have you been married ?
3] ... (read in full...)
Does he not find me attractive now? He loses his erection as he gets the condom
Q. my boyfriend and i, are ready for sex, he's 21 and im 20, but the problem is... he loses his erection when he reaches for the condoms. i still play with him but that doesn't keep him hard enough to place the condom on. he blames exam stress f...
A. 24 April 2011: He's probably closet [ to himself even ] gay. You need to get him to deal with it honestly so that you can both move on ... (read in full...)
Would adding her on Facebook put us in the dreaded "friend zone"
Q. Alright kind of a long question here. Alright, so there was this girl who lived in the room next to me in residence at university and about 2 weeks ago she mentioned that she and her boyfriend had broken up but she seemed to be over it from what I ...
A. 17 April 2011: Why not send her an email in not too heavy terms along the lines.......# I'm sorry there was no time after the exams before you left for the summer - I would have really liked to have dinner with you for a good talk / whatever ##
and see if y... (read in full...)
Hard bump on my forearm. Any ideas?
Q. I have a hard bump on my forearm its been there for like 6 months and won't goo away, any idea what it might be?...
A. 17 April 2011: For heaven's sake any persistent lump could be cancer until a qualified doctor or specialist diagnoses otherwise.
SO GET DIAGNOSED !!! ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is awful at oral sex!! How do I tell him this without hurting him??
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for nearly 2years. i truely love him.but he's awful at oral sex. I don't know how to tell him this without hurting him. What should I do?...
A. 17 April 2011: Perhaps he doesn't like it either - perhaps he'd be mighty relieved if you asked him to stick to penis-in-vagina from now on........
... (read in full...)
My ex cheated on me and now she's with a guy who used to be a good friend of mine. I'm a mess right now! Help!!
Q. I was cheated on by my ex and now she's with a guy who used to be a good friend of mine. I know it's a cliche. Anyway, I found out she was doing all this behind my back after about 5 months last year in Dec, which means she started this in Sept. No...
A. 17 April 2011: Here's how you get out of the mess :
1] Accept that bad things happen to good people - there is no value or benefit whatever in examining it all minutely and hoping to make sense of it. IT HAPPENED - like being run over by a bus whose dr... (read in full...)
Girlfriend has started sharing her past with me and I wish she wouldn't!
Q. Basically I'm insanely jealous about my girlfriend's past sex life. She is my first, and she has had 4 before me. Now, at first I didn't care since I didn't know who those people were and I didn't know any details. I was happy with it staying like ...
A. 7 March 2011: Yuck !
Just break up with her and go looking for a nicer girl.
Sounds to me like all you're getting out of this is sex - not a relationship of equals.
OK for a while till you meet someone you'll be sexually frustrated but at least... (read in full...)
I found my teacher on a gay dating site. I'm interested in him. Should I contact him?
Q. Okay well, I'm in my final year of school and will be heading off to uni next year. Since I'm almost 18 and still a virgin (it's somewhat difficult to find other gay guys) I figured I might as well sign up to a few dating/hookup sites and see if ...
A. 7 March 2011: Do NOTHING till you have definitively left school. When you have left school, you could send him a message but I would suggest not mentioning you know him from school. If you don't wait till you have left school you may tempt him to do somethin... (read in full...)
My boyfriend genuinely cares about me, but has issues with porn and looking at other women
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for over a year. When we initially started dating he seemed flawless! After we began to get serious I started finding porn stashes in his room, and caught him staring at women. It really hurt me, to the extent of making ...
A. 7 March 2011: If everything else about the relationship is fine just stop fixating on this minor thing : it IS just a guy thing. If you think you're going to find some guy who never looks at other women prepare to remain single for many years ! ... (read in full...)
What do girls like guys to wear?
Q. What do girls like guys to wear? What kind of clothing would you girls prefer to see a guy wearing around in school? I'm a normal guy.......
A. 25 February 2011: Thanks Anon - so which of my suggestions did you try ?
... (read in full...)
What do girls like guys to wear?
Q. What do girls like guys to wear? What kind of clothing would you girls prefer to see a guy wearing around in school? I'm a normal guy.......
A. 20 February 2011: Before the clothes what's inside them ? Provided you are slim and have a neat, tight, ass the clothes won't matter much. And most girls don't want boys who act like girls in spending time and money on their appearance [ref Kurt in Glee - ... (read in full...)
She's not a virgin but doesn't want to have sex with me!
Q. Hello everyone, thanks for taking the time to read my question. Anyhow so I currently have a girlfriend. She is not a virgin; I am. We have been dating for 8 months now and I want to have sex but she keeps telling me she wants to wait until ...
A. 20 February 2011: At 16 or 17 you are perfectly normal to have a strong need and desire to experience sexual intercourse.
It's totally normal.
She is entirely entitled to say 'no thanks' but my view is it is not unreasonable for you to treat that as a deal-b... (read in full...)
My fiance and I have been together a year and I'm a virgin. But is he a sex addict?
Q. Hello, i've been in relationship for a year, and then got engaged to a guy, but i feel inside he is sex addicted. we 've never been in a sexual relationship and i am still virgin, even in my thoughts about love.. last time we went out we were exc...
A. 19 February 2011: After a year, sex is long overdue. I'm surprised he's still around.... (read in full...)
Does my girlfriend have a problem? and is it fixable?
Q. my girlfriend comes home from work and changes her panties which are soaking wet in crotch area and leaves them on the floor. i've accidently walked on them and they were very wet. she seems to come home with her panties soaked a couple times a week...
A. 18 February 2011: Well if you're getting off on it what's the problem ?
Plus you could always just ask her.
Plus maybe she gets wet on the way home thinking about what her bf's gonna give her when she gets there.
... (read in full...)
Now that I'm older, I have no idea what he saw in me at that age. How can I process this?
Q. When I was 18, I began dating a man who was 25. At first my friends and family were wary of the age gap, but we clicked and he turned out to be the love of my life. I'm 23 now, he's 30, and we're still together. Throughout our relationship, I ...
A. 18 February 2011: You're worrying about nothing : a theoretical issue at most and one which is in the past.
Forget such nonsense and give thanks you have a great relationship with a great guy.
... (read in full...)
What do you think of this internet relationship?
Q. so. i've been in an online relationship with a girl. for a year and a half. i was looking for a gf online because i was in a car accident and couldn't leave the house enough to really look for anyone. and it was easy...so i just kept talking to her ...
A. 10 February 2011: End it now - politely but firmly.
Then move on and find someone new - whether online or not.... (read in full...)
She gives away the gifts I give her!
Q. I need some advice... Well my wife doesn't appreciate the the things I give to her, I have bought her many items and later on I come to find out she gives them away. Recently I found out she had given away to her sister a very expensive watch I had ...
A. 8 February 2011: No you are not over - reacting : what she did was hurtful, and actually intended to be so as she must have known you would find out.
What is her explanation ? Maybe deep down she wants to split ?
You need a big talk and maybe couples co... (read in full...)
I just don't want to get hurt again, because it seems that's all women do to me.
Q. So i had a relationship with a girl for 2 and a half years and got totally fucked over by her, and am finally at a stage where i think i'm ready to move on. after about 6 months. I'm in my final year of uni, and have been interested in th...
A. 7 February 2011: Well you should either email or text her [ or maybe even handwrite a note just to make a change ] in which you explain what you say here about wanting her for more than just sex and will she please at least think about giving it a try ? Stress yo... (read in full...)
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