How can I change her mind? My wife has unexpectedly said she wants a divorce!
Q. My wife and I have been married for four years. I thought these were happy times for her, because we had just recently purchased a house together. I am attending school again, and working. We both are making good money and everything is was good. ...
A. 25 July 2010: I so often find myself in radical disagreement with the responders on this advice website but I have to say I agree SPOT ON with Tisha 1 a few posts below. You're 'wife' has made plain over a prolonged period that she no longer wishes to... (read in full...)
How can I change her mind? My wife has unexpectedly said she wants a divorce!
Q. My wife and I have been married for four years. I thought these were happy times for her, because we had just recently purchased a house together. I am attending school again, and working. We both are making good money and everything is was good. ...
A. 14 June 2010: Well I don-t understand why a UK degree wd be accepted in NY but not NC but anyway that-s in the past :
Meanwhile for what it-s worth be glad you have your youth and there isn-t the complication of kids......
Try a new hobby - other distrac... (read in full...)
Help! I don't want to be a friends with benefits!
Q. This is a second part to my first question that i had asked before. So I dated this guy for a month..broke up..went out as freinds had a good time..next thing i know where in the bedroom. I woke up left his house wrote the note had a good time don't ...
A. 14 June 2010: Well why not enjoy it then ?
A great sex life is more than most people have got !... (read in full...)
What should I do when I go visit her?
Q. I was with an amazing girl for 4 months. We sadly knew it would end at some stage because she was out here in Africa on a gap year teaching at one of the local schools. She had to go back to UK to finish University and I was just starting out my ...
A. 14 June 2010: The logic would be to have a complete break : any attempt to remain 'friends' just won't work and it will postpone the day when you can not be miserable and start relating to other women.... (read in full...)
He wants me but thinks we should take a break because he's curious?!!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been going out for 2 years. He left for basic training for 10 weeks. But before that, he's been telling me how he's been curious. (He's very honest) He says that he feels bad for wanting to know what it's like to be with ...
A. 14 June 2010: I think it-s a good thing he is being honest and he should get on with trying sex and relationships / whatever with others.....
And so should you if that-s what you want.
There are so many posts on here from people in their 30s and 40s who... (read in full...)
How can I change her mind? My wife has unexpectedly said she wants a divorce!
Q. My wife and I have been married for four years. I thought these were happy times for her, because we had just recently purchased a house together. I am attending school again, and working. We both are making good money and everything is was good. ...
A. 14 June 2010: I have a friend with a UK law degree and he passed the NY State Bar exams - supposedly the hardest of all US Bars - with an intensive summer school ie just 3 or 4 months of study :
So if she had really wanted to she could have devoted a year or ... (read in full...)
It is night like tonight that I get lonely and miss my girlfriend..
Q. Hello, I'm feeling a little depressed. My ex gf dumped me 9 months ago and in a nutshell I havent had any physical contact with a woman since [Just to clarify I've been over her for a long while now]. The reason I say this is because I just m...
A. 14 June 2010: I wd suggest make a load more efforts specifically to meet girls and date with them - eg internet as well as traditional places : bars friends at work etc.. And don-t insist on perfection before you get your pants off again with someone - othe... (read in full...)
Help! I don't want to be a friends with benefits!
Q. This is a second part to my first question that i had asked before. So I dated this guy for a month..broke up..went out as freinds had a good time..next thing i know where in the bedroom. I woke up left his house wrote the note had a good time don't ...
A. 14 June 2010: Well do you or don-t you enjoy the sex with him # .
If you do why not have more of it; to mutual benefit #.
... (read in full...)
What should I do when I go visit her?
Q. I was with an amazing girl for 4 months. We sadly knew it would end at some stage because she was out here in Africa on a gap year teaching at one of the local schools. She had to go back to UK to finish University and I was just starting out my ...
A. 14 June 2010: I think that at 19 she realizes it is too soon for her to settle permanently for the first man she has fallen for - and she-s trying to convey that to you gently.
If I were you I would not prolong the agony by going to see her again. She want... (read in full...)
HIs fantasy freaks me out!
Q. I'm 18 and I'm having sex with a 40 year old man. We met on the Internet and met up in a hotel for the night, we stay in hotels most weekends and have for a while. its really amazing and we are both sexually attracted to each other and have amazing ...
A. 14 June 2010: It does sound a bit gross to me.
You could tell him that what goes on in his head while you are doing it is fair enough but its not something you would get any pleasure from joining in with and so you are not going to:
I doubt if he will call ... (read in full...)
What does this text mean?
Q. Im slightly confused by a text ive just recieved. Theres a group of 4 of us that usually go out. 3 of us said yeah lets go out this weekend so i text my guy mate who also comes out with us and said "we might be going out this saturday night, you ...
A. 14 June 2010: Well it could be a hint he is interested in you as more than just a member of the group and he is shy about coming out with it for fear of rejection. So just be patient and see if he throws out any more similar hints : eg make sure you sit rig... (read in full...)
Girlfriend's mum caught us having phone sex, what can I do?
Q. Girlfriend's mum caught us having phone sex, what can I do? Well, yesterday my girlfriend's mum caught us having phone sex and she had a go with her, and believed that we were making out in her room when I stayed around hers some weeks ago. Sh...
A. 14 June 2010: Ignore all the answers below : they are a very girly response to a NON-PROBLEM ! Fact is you*re a boy / young man and the latter are expected to take the lead and initiate some king of sexual activity with their girlfriends. You haven*t done... (read in full...)
She initially told me she had a high sex drive! But since moving in together, I've been living like a monk!
Q. Hi there - i'm looking for some advice please... I have been with my girlfriend for roughly a year now, and she recently moved in with me. We have a really good relationship, we're both kind people and considerate and loving to each other. Now we'v...
A. 14 June 2010: Yoù re entitled to sex and plenty of it - and she*s not giving it to you so you*ll just have to seek it out with another woman or women. You should tell her this - be upfront about it: after all she has chosen to live with a man not a mouse ... (read in full...)
I really want this threesome!
Q. hey im 26 and my girlfriends 20 . we have been together for 3 years we had our ups and downs but we are pretty good now. we have a baby together. i wanna have a threesome. perferably another girl. but i wouldnt mind if it was another dude. im not ...
A. 14 June 2010: Well you just have to ask her to decide whether she is or isn't up for it; and if she is does she prefer boy or girl ? If she's not up for it then you have to decide if you can settle for 1 on 1 sex with the mother of your kid ! ... (read in full...)
Wife seems to have lost interest in me. Is it time to leave?
Q. wife not interested in being touched,held,hogs,kissing,sex asked her to talk to doctor and she throws a fit. moved out of bedroom about 6 years ago,said i made to much noise. everything i do is wrong,anything i get for her is wrong is...
A. 14 June 2010: Well in reality you have already divorced: you are just living in the same house.
You'll be happier splitting and getting your own little place and meeting new women .
[Have you really gone thru your 20's without sex for that many years ? ]... (read in full...)
Heartbroken and pregnant at 16...
Q. 7 months ago, i moved to the Dominican Republic with my mom. i fell head over heels in love with a boy and we were " together " for 6 months, just last week i find out he has had a girlfriend the entire time we were " together " to make matters a ...
A. 14 June 2010: He is not going to be a dad to this kid - you will get zero child support from him, and he's already dumped you anyway by the sounds of things.
I don't agree with late abortions but at 2 months there's not really much there : you are just in ... (read in full...)
Could there be another girl on the scene that he's not telling me about?
Q. I have been dating a guy for the past 4 months or so. At the beginning of the relationship we were so happy and had so much fun being around each other. We had lots of sex plus it was in fun, exhilirating places. He has been acting very strange ...
A. 14 June 2010: Ignore the first answer. You are just as entitled to enjoy the sex as the man is and I for one never think less of a girl just because she is obviously horny a lot of the time. It was a relationship which has now expired : you enjoyed it whi... (read in full...)
I don't want to become a selfish lover...
Q. i am a 27 year old female. i enjoy sex just as much as the next person. my problem is that i come very quickly. in about 2 or 3 minutes of intercourse i have orgasmed. after orgasm i dont feel like sex anymore and my boyfriend is left to finish ...
A. 13 June 2010: When you say he has to finish himself off..... you mean by jerking off ? You don't let him continue in your vagina till he orgasms ?
I've never heard of any girl doing that before.
If he's given you an orgasm isn't he entitled to one ... (read in full...)
How can I give a better blow job experience?
Q. I'm 19 and my boyfriend and I have been dating for a good while now. About 3 weeks ago I gave him a blow job for the first time. Since then I have probably done it three other times. I keep saying I have no idea what I'm doing, I'm horrible because ...
A. 13 June 2010: Well if he is not complaining why are you bothered ?
But if you want to vary it try 69 ing : your mouth to his penis and his mouth and tongue to your clit and vag.
I suppose different men like different things but for me being stimulated... (read in full...)
Would it be wrong to ask my ex to have my baby???
Q. my ex and i are still good friends our relationship died but not our friendship. we are always there to talk stuff over and that i want a baby and i asked my ex for the following reasons i no he has no std's i no he would respect me and my ...
A. 13 June 2010: You are contemplating bringing a baby into the world without its having a committed father to help love it and bring it up.
Why ? Why not just wait till you meet a man who also wants to be a dad and have a kid with him ?... (read in full...)
Wanting to move to next base with him but he doesn't seem to want to know... help!
Q. I have been going out with this boy for quite a while now, and I just can't stop thinking about him. He really turns me on and I just can't stop day dreaming about us doing something really naughty together in the shower, his room, changing rooms ...
A. 13 June 2010: You should accept he's a closet gay and look elsewhere for your sexual needs, even if he's a nice friend.
With all the encouragement you are giving any str8 boy wd have been in yr pants long ago ! ... (read in full...)
How can those feelings just be forgotten because I happened to discover their affair?
Q. I found undeleted texts on my husband's phone that showed he was having an emotional afair with a work colleague. I wrongly thought that it would stop as he seemed to be genuinely sorry. Six weeks later I found another batch he had forgotte...
A. 13 June 2010: Unless he's particularly un-techno savvy I suspect he left the 2nd load of texts so you WOULD find then and have the quarrel etc about it.
Maybe he's weak and needed you to blow off his gf as he didn't have the whatever to break up with her... (read in full...)
Advice please!!! What does he want from me!???
Q. Sorry for the long post, I don't know how else to give a better idea of what I'm dealing with than to tell the whole story, lol. I have been in a "friends with benefits" relationship with a guy for about 8 months now. We'd been "seeing" each ot...
A. 13 June 2010: He wants to have sex and friendship with you but also be free to see other women.
He doesn't want to be pinned down into exclusive relationship with you.
If you can accept that [ and you shd be equally free to go with other men] then maybe y... (read in full...)
Does a leopard ever change his spots?
Q. I was going out with a guy for a few months until I found out that whilst he was with me he was also someone I'm friendly with. She did'nt know that I was with him. We had a major fight over this and I didnt speak to him for nearly 2 months, ...
A. 13 June 2010: You've obviously got the hots for him so why not enjoy what he does for you and accept you'll be time sharing him with other women ?
Tell him you're free also to see other men.... (read in full...)
She'll be heading to Australia and me to France. Can this work out?
Q. Ok so first time doing this here's my question. I'm 23 and the girl i'm seeing is 18. We hooked up on New Years when i was 22. She's really mature for her age though sometimes it apparent i'm the older. At the start i wanted it kept on a pretty ...
A. 13 June 2010: Just enjoy your summer together [ unless she cools even more than you say ].
It's pointless to make commitments beyond that : she'll meet up with hunky Oz guys and you'll hook up with filles fran,caises so just ENJOY !!
... (read in full...)
I'm depressed about my looks and my life, what can I do?
Q. I'm 16 and nearly a grown man and i having problems with myself. I put myself down all the time and its taken over my life making me sad. One reason is because i feel like i don't look good in the face, i feel like i look old and ugly and black and ...
A. 13 June 2010: You just need a bit more self confidence.
Maybe force yourself to go to the gym [or just do exercises at home ] and tone up your bod : girls love a cute ass and anyone can work to get that at least ! :)
Plus - doesn't your school have a co... (read in full...)
How do you put your penis in your briefs?
Q. Okay this might be an awkward question, but here goes. How do you put your penis in your briefs? I'm asking this because I put my penis in one of the sides of the brief because it's easier if you get an erection, am I the only one or are there ot...
A. 13 June 2010: If you're right handed it makes sense to let it plus balls hang to the left - makes getting it out to urinate slightly easier.
Tailors will tell you that most men 'dress to the left'.
Btw boxers are advised rather than briefs : the lat... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend and my mom won't let me go out with him
Q. Hey cupid, i have been with my boyfriend for two weeks and he been asking if i could go out on a date, and i know him very well he was my friend at first then i heard that he likes me and i started to know him first. Then i started to like him and ...
A. 13 June 2010: Why not ask your Mom directly what he has to do for her to let you go out with him ?
Try not to make a drama out of it.
For sure he wants to have sex with you, your Mom knows that and doesn't want it to happen..... so there's bound to be some... (read in full...)
My husband is becoming increasingly abusive
Q. I am worried about my relationship with my husband. About a year after we got married I got a call in the middle of the night saying my husband had been arrested at work. It turned out he had a warrant out for his arrest. I had just given birth to ...
A. 13 June 2010: If he will go with you to couples counselling you could give that a try.
But it sounds unlikely and you need to devise an exit strategy. ... (read in full...)
We argue when we're apart!
Q. me and my girlfriend have been having a problem. We are great together when we aren't away from each other for too long. I mean amazing. so much passion its like a dream. but when we are apart for more than two days, its hard for us not to argue ...
A. 13 June 2010: Why don't you try moving in together ?... (read in full...)
Do I confront my boyfriend?
Q. I met my boyfriend about 8 months ago. We started out really well and still doing great but lately some things have been bothering me. I don't know if I'm just insecure or there is something I should be concerned about. Before we became serious w...
A. 13 June 2010: You can't calculate 10% and then add on a bit without a calculator ?
Yes you do need to have the conversation and if it's essential to you that he does not see other boys then you need to split. Things have to be clear.
... (read in full...)
I'm not sexually attracted to my boyfriend!
Q. Hi, my boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 years now. We never had sex until a year after started dating. I didn't want to at first because I wanted to wait until we get married, but he couldn't. Somehow I could understand that and so we started ...
A. 13 June 2010: Break up; move out; and move on.
But don't make a great theatrical production of it or seek someone to blame ...... Tell him you've just realized you are incompatible 'not your fault' and you should both put it down to experience.... (read in full...)
I think he is lying to me about this other girl! What should I do?
Q. i think the guy i like (and i assumed the feeling was mutual) is lying to me. i asked him specifically if he knew a girl by the name of ----. i don't know her personally, i only know she is a very nice girl.. he said, very convincingly No. clu...
A. 13 June 2010: Clearly he isn't giving you what you want.
So break up and move on.
And stop beefing about it. ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my step-father's porn habit?
Q. I was using my step-dad's computer and saw a bunch of porn sites in his most visited, along with a bunch of websites intended to hook people up with with other people for sex or webcam chats. I'm not sure what to do with this. I know most men look, ...
A. 13 June 2010: The way you deal with it is by minding your own business and getting your own laptop - or better still apartment.
And never mention it to your mother again. ... (read in full...)
Should I follow my heart and committ to the other woman, or do the right thing and try and save my marriage?
Q. I have been married for 21 years and together for 28 years and i have 3 children. I got myself in a real difficult situation. About 3 years ago i meet this women she is married with 4 children. Our kids go to the same school and we are both into tri...
A. 13 June 2010: Well what a mess !
You know what the right [morally] thing to do is - try and patch up the marriage for the sake of the innocent parties in all this.....
But is that now even possible ? Would your wife have you back ?
You should neve... (read in full...)
Why is my ex girlfriend so cold hearted?
Q. hey there ... once again im back here for advice ... if you have read my past posts you would know my background story to just refresh it .. my ex gf of 11 months broke up with me cause she said she didn't love me any more and said she w...
A. 13 June 2010: Whether she's a bitch or not is neither here nor there: you are doing this to yourself !
Cry yourself to sleep if you must but once you are out in public or MSN -ing DON'T let her or anyone see how upset you are. Even if you have to act a pa... (read in full...)
Should my boyfriend take his ex wife to court?
Q. I am asking this question on behalf of my boyfriend. My bf and his ex wife have a custody agreement over there 3 year old daughter. Now she has been withholding information from him. She has physical custody and a joint legal custody. She is ...
A. 13 June 2010: Could he really cope with full custody of a 3 yr old ? That's a hell of a responsibility and constraint on freedom of movement.
Can he afford child care when he is at work or for someone to take her to and from school ?
Be careful what you... (read in full...)
How do I let go of my married man when we work together every day?
Q. I've been having an affair with a married man for 8 years. At first it was very innocent, lots of flirting, kissing and up until a month ago everything but sex, we've recently engaged in it. My feelings for him are so strong, and I know he doesn't ...
A. 13 June 2010: You [ and he but that's by the way] are risking destroying the happiness of innocent parties : the children and his wife.
You need to get right away and the obvious route is to change your job and maybe even city if that is possible. Cut off ... (read in full...)
Should I feel ashamed that my girlfriend earns more than me?
Q. My Girlfriend is a system analyst and makes more money then me. Should I feel ashamed? I feel almost like I've been de-masculine-ed...
A. 13 June 2010: But is your income sufficient so you can pay your way - eg in restaurants ?
Or if you were living together can you pay half the rent etc ? If she is not having to subsidize you I wd think stop worrying. But if she is that would explain ... (read in full...)
She wants me to pay her bills yet we don't even have sex!
Q. if im in a relationship with my girlfriend, and she wants me to help her pay bills, but doesnt want to have sex or sleep together, what is my best resolution??...
A. 13 June 2010: Your situation has become incredibly yucky.
I wd say just get out of there and move on to someone else.
Sex or no sex why would you be paying her bills if you are not sharing an apartment ?... (read in full...)
When my boyfriend drinks, he tells me he doesn't love
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost four years now he starts to drink and then he starts to talk down to me he tells me he doesn't love me and then the next morning he loves me again he's never apologizing even when he knows hes wrong. ...
A. 13 June 2010: In vino veritas :
ie what he says when in drink is what he actually thinks.
Get well away as soon as you can.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend isn't affectionate toward me
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 10 months now and she never shows affection toward me. She always finds ways whereby we don't have quality time together like going shopping or meeting up with friends. The thing that upsets me is that wit...
A. 13 June 2010: Move away for your own sanity and sexual health:
10 months and no pants - off activities ?
Get real - she's using you as a cuddly toy.... (read in full...)
Need help satisfying my boyfriend!
Q. my question is about and the fact im so bad at it and i have no idea what to do. i feel like i just lie there and try tomove to help my bf but it never seems towork and when im on top its disasterous! Everytime i move it just seems to fall ou...
A. 13 June 2010: But is he in fact complaining ?
Maybe you are worrying about nothing.
But if he is not happy just ask him what exactly he wants you to do.
... (read in full...)
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