I cheated on my husband, and then lied to him about how far I went with this man. How do we move on in our relationship?
Q. Hello, I have a huge dilema, I cheated on my husband and it all came out about 9 months ago,the affair stopped and my marriage is still intact, although it has taken a lot of trust and patience from my husband.I have been married a long time and ...
A. 24 February 2009: Well, I think telling him the truth is the only way you'll ever really feel connected to your husband again. I beleive deep down you feel that his love and forgiveness for you is false becuase it is based on false assumptions. I hate the idea of... (read in full...)
He is very upset and unsure if he should marry a 'loose woman' (because of her past).
Q. OK, I don't have a problem, but I have a friend who is having some serious thoughts about his fiancee. I intend on getting as much advice from this site as I can, then either print out the answers, or log on (not at work) and have him read all your ...
A. 20 February 2009: I agree with Yo's. I think a majority of men would find it a lot easier to accept someone who had one or two long term committed relationships rather than a string of flings or one night stands. There is a feeling of cheapness that tarnishes sex ... (read in full...)
How many sleeping partner have you had
Q. Hi im doing a survey about how many sleeping partners (vaginal or anal) you or anyone you know, GF/BF etc, has had? Plz also state how sure you are of yours and your partners number! Plz be honest as there's no need to lie because you can just put...
A. 6 February 2009: I'm 27 and have been with two women including my fiance.
She is 26 and has been with 13 men including me. ... (read in full...)
Guys: Is the first thing you notice about a girl REALLY the size of her chest?
Q. So, I'm in high school, and I've come to notice a trend in guys' behavior. (well the ones I'm around at least) They always stare at your chest. There's one guy, when asked if he knew me, said, "Oh yeah, she has really big boobs." Swear to God. My ...
A. 26 January 2009: Personally, The first thing I notice is her face and hair. I am probably more attracted to a cute face more than anything else. The way she wears her hair is also a big factor for me. If a girl can pick the right hairstyle that complement's her face ... (read in full...)
Married but pregnant with my exes child, what should I do now?
Q. I have been in this relationship with my husband since I was 17 years old. Last year we started having problems nothing too major, but big enough for me to reach out to an old friend. Long story short I broke up with my ex to be with my now husband ...
A. 22 January 2009: You need to tell him and let the chips fall where they may. When the baby arrives, make sure you get a paternity test. It still could be your husband's. Your husband doesn't deserve to raise another man's child thinking it is his own. Infidelity ... (read in full...)
Secret from the past quite unpleasant
Q. My husband of 6 years has just admitted to me that he slept with another women over 8 years. at the time he lied to me about it. we now have two beautiful children. But I feel very hurt and angry even though it happened so long ago. What should I ...
A. 16 January 2009: Were you together in a relationship when this happened?... (read in full...)
Why are guys so quick to start talking about sex?
Q. Hello Dear Cupiters! I'm wondering why this is happening.. I talk to guys just fine. But when they start to mention sex a lot in the conversation, I make it clear that I'm not an easy gal! And this happens when we're just getting to know each ...
A. 14 January 2009: Yeah, if that's what he's talking about, then that's what he is looking for out of this relationship. ... (read in full...)
Anyone had sex on a first date that turned into a relationship?
Q. I just wanted to know if anyone has ever had sex with a guy on a first date and it turned into a relationship? Men and Women please both answer. Thank you....
A. 14 January 2009: Maybe I am just old fashioned or a hopeless romantic, but I've never even tried to go to bed with someone on a first date. However me being a guy, as well as being older and having a much less idealistic view of the world than in my early twenties, ... (read in full...)
Do I tell my b/f I slept with my ex at the beginning of our relationship?
Q. I started seeing a guy a few months back and I thought he was lovely but it was nothing serious. At the time I was still really good mates with my ex and a few times he came round and it felt like we were still together, we ended up having sex and ...
A. 13 January 2009: As long as you and your current boyfriend weren't in an exclusive relationship at the time, I wouldn't say anything to him unless he asks.
Unless you want to risk causing him an unbelievable amount of emotional pain, I would highly advise that you... (read in full...)
What age were you when you lost YOUR virginity? (I was 23)
Q. This is kind of an idle question I suppose. I've noticed and been kind of alarmed by a large number of sex questions being asked by kids in the 13-15 year old age range. (It seems awfully young to me.) I'd like to have kids of my own some day ...
A. 12 January 2009: I was 25. I waited a long time for someone I truly loved. I thought it would help build a stronger bond with someone if I didn't sleep around. The only problem is it only works if your partner didn't sleep around either.
It's depressing how chea... (read in full...)
I am afraid I have ruined my marriage with this affair, what to do?
Q. Hello Cupids I apologize in advance as this may get a bit long, and any advice is welcome so please do reply if you have any thoughts. I will try to keep it clear and organized but my head is a mess so sorry if this story seems messy too. I ...
A. 30 December 2008: Everyone makes mistakes, and everyone should get a second chance, but your HUSBAND DESERVES TO KNOW!
I can't believe how people on this site can flippantly say that your husband doesn't need to know! I guess it doesn't matter that you've made the... (read in full...)
I am afraid I have ruined my marriage with this affair, what to do?
Q. Hello Cupids I apologize in advance as this may get a bit long, and any advice is welcome so please do reply if you have any thoughts. I will try to keep it clear and organized but my head is a mess so sorry if this story seems messy too. I ...
A. 29 December 2008: It sounds like a classic seven year itch to me: Well the one bright spot is that you don't have any children, so whatever happens its not going to hurt them. 1. Your husband deserves to know what's going on. The more time passes, the more devas... (read in full...)
Am I destined for permanent fuck buddy status?
Q. I'm 23 years old and I have had literally enough boyfriends to equal my age. Its really depressing because no matter who I date (older or yonger, race, religion, whatever)every guy I've ever dated only looks at me as a fuck buddy. I recently...
A. 29 December 2008: The advice you have here is sound. If you want someone who values a relationship with you more than a booty call, then demand commitment before you take it into the bedroom. You will earn a lot more respect that way. There are men out there wh... (read in full...)
Am I destined for permanent fuck buddy status?
Q. I'm 23 years old and I have had literally enough boyfriends to equal my age. Its really depressing because no matter who I date (older or yonger, race, religion, whatever)every guy I've ever dated only looks at me as a fuck buddy. I recently...
A. 29 December 2008: What do you mean "he hated everything sexual about me?"... (read in full...)
Missed taking pill 5 days and now could be pregnant...
Q. Okay I have a problem I have been on birth control for about 2 months now well I forgot to fill the prescription for my 3rd refill and their were 5 days I didnt take to pill. Well on the 5th day I took the pill and then that night me and my husband ...
A. 29 December 2008: The most important pill of the pack is the first one! If you miss that pill, you have a decent chance of ovulating during your cycle. Since you missed the first five I'd say there is a good chance you ovulated. The brownish discharge sounds ... (read in full...)
Swingin' bachelor dating a single Mom - I'm not a family man, can this work?
Q. So, I've found the almost perfect woman and we've been dating a year now. She's the best g/f I've ever had. I always had a rule against dating single moms, but when I met her, I chose to break that rule and now I'm in love w/ her, but I can not ...
A. 26 December 2008: It sounds like you already resent her. True love is the willingness to sacrifice one's self for someone else. If you really loved her, then you would be willing to accept the new responsibility of surrogate dad. Life isn't fair but that's what love ... (read in full...)
How do I end it with her? She's bipolar.
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years now. I still love her to death but she has become someone I am not in love with. For starters, she is bi-polar. She has drastic mood swings and constantly argues. I am a very laid back guy and can easily ...
A. 23 December 2008: Hey MarieClaire, Go easy on this guy! Its not like he's married to her.
This girl is making him miserable and you are making him feel guilty for wanting a normal life.
So basically because she's mentally ill, she's allowed to scream at him, m... (read in full...)
How would you react if you found out you were dating a virgin?
Q. I just recently started dating a guy. He just found out that I am a virgin. I asked him how he felt about it after he had time to get over his shock (I'm 22.... it's not all that common to come across..I guess). He told me that he was fine with ...
A. 19 December 2008: I don't disagree with you "pvtguy". I'd want to make sure that my partner enjoys sex and that we have good chemistry before committing the rest of my life to her, BUT at the same time, there is something really special about a girl who doesn't just ... (read in full...)
How would you react if you found out you were dating a virgin?
Q. I just recently started dating a guy. He just found out that I am a virgin. I asked him how he felt about it after he had time to get over his shock (I'm 22.... it's not all that common to come across..I guess). He told me that he was fine with ...
A. 19 December 2008: I would think I had found someone very special! Girls like you are few and far between. I haven't dated a virgin since high school. What you have is a gift. Make sure who ever you give it to will cherish it, and cherish you. ... (read in full...)
She never told me that she had a boyfriend!
Q. This is going to be a little long. I met this girl in one of my college classes. The flirting started when every time she would walk pass, she would turn around make eye contact and smile at me. Most of the time she would end up sitting near me ...
A. 19 December 2008: It really sounds like she was playing with you. Some people just like to flirt. Once you started pursuing her the game was over. It wasn't fun for her anymore. My brother is like that. Relationship or no, he'll flirt with every girl he see's. I... (read in full...)
What can I do to curb my sexual desires?
Q. I was wondering is there anything I can do to curb my sexual desires? My boyfriend and I don't get intimate very often, in fact we go months without any sort of intimacy. I need to know if there's anything I can do to squash my sexual urges so that ...
A. 16 December 2008: I agree with Petinal.
Being sexually compatible is very, very important in any long term relationship.
I know exactly what you mean by being cranky and frustrated. My first long term girlfreind (now ex)sounds a lot like your boyfriend. She o... (read in full...)
Is a man's orgasm more intense when he cums inside his partner?
Q. This a rather silly question but maybe the answer will resolve a dispute between my bf and I. Is a man's orgasm more intense when he cums inside his partner? I've been with my bf for over 2 years. I never refuse him sex. I don't make him wear a ...
A. 12 December 2008: Its unfortunate that you don't like the "leakage" aspect of sex.
As a guy, I love that sex is messy and so does my fiance. I love the sight of my semen spilling back out of her after sex. I love that my partner trusts me and loves me so much tha... (read in full...)
He asked me if I have had sex, and when the answer was yes he stopped texting!
Q. Hello Cupiters! Okay, I started talking to this one guy..he's 26. Just by phone and text..we still haven't met because I think it's still too soon. I want to give it a lil more time since I met him thru an online dating site. Anyways, it's b...
A. 12 December 2008: I would guess that he is planning to wait for marraige to have sex and is wanting to marry someone who's waited as well. I was like him once. I waited until I was 25 before I finally gave up.
Even for guys, there is something very romantic... (read in full...)
What should I do so that he doesn't leave because of my sexual past?
Q. my boyfriend of 4 years and i have been constantly fighting about my past sexual relationships, which unfortunately he knows the details about my exes. he keeps saying he will leave because i expect him to live and love a person like me, who gave...
A. 12 December 2008: This is a really tough one. First of all, I am not going to hate on your boyfriend, but I do think he is out of line for putting you down and stringing you along. You deserve someone who can love and respect you for who you are. There are lots of ... (read in full...)
Is 12 sexual partners considered slutty?
Q. I've just starting going out with a great girl, we are both 22, but recently found out that she has had 12 sexual partners, I didn't take the news well, she has only had 1 one night stand in her past but I am still concerned that she sounds slutty ...
A. 9 December 2008: Whether or not she is a "slut" is all in the eye of the beholder. How many women have you slept with? If its only been one or two people, her past is probably a little hard to accept right now.
If you have had more partners than her, then I d... (read in full...)
Her sexual past haunts me daily, I didn't even ask, she volunteered the information!!
Q. I've been dating a girl for about six months now. I purposely never asked about her sexual past. However she has offered up more than enough information on her own.I cannot seem to get over her past as much as I try. I know I can't change it, I do ...
A. 18 November 2008: I feel for you man. :( I'm in the exact same shoes that you are my friend. I don't know which is worse. Living with this pain for the rest of my life, or walking away knowing that I'll probably never find another girl who loves me this m... (read in full...)
Men: why do you ask about a woman's past if you're just going to judge her for it?
Q. Men: Why do you ask about a woman's sexual past if you are going to (intentionally or otherwise) judge her for it and hold it against her? ...even when she has never been unfaithful, she has always been honest with you, she is with you and doesn't ...
A. 18 November 2008: We ask because, like it or not, we are going to judge you for it.
If the number is too high for us or we find out that our partners did something that turns our stomachs, then we have every right to move on. Ladies you can do the same thing to... (read in full...)
Women's comparrison of sex partners
Q. Hí. I've been reading around and found some answers wich i consider a little scary. I read that women always remember previous sex partners and compare current partner with them. So i have a double question about this for women: 1.- Wich's the re...
A. 6 November 2008: Talktoomuch, That was a really beautiful answer. Very well said. It helped me a lot and I didn't even ask the question. ... (read in full...)
Is she testing me after 8 months of nonsense?
Q. Hi Everyone, I have been dating this girl (# 1) (28 years old) for 8 months. Months ago she basically said only friend status. Days later from that she went on vacation and I met another women. I dated her (lets call her # 2) for a couple mon...
A. 6 November 2008: I hate to say this, but she's playing you like a fiddle.
I dated a girl like this. It was a horrible experience. She ended up stringing me along for a while before I finally gave up on her. She eventually started a relationship with one of my fr... (read in full...)
I showed him porn sites, but has he taken it too far? Confused and hurt...
Q. I am going to make it clear to everyone that I have nothing against porn.. Heck, I even showed my boyfriend a bunch of different web-sites so that we could watch them together! But now, of course I think I might be regretting that decision. I am...
A. 5 November 2008: I've got to agree with Diovan Lestat. I couldn't think of a better way to say what she wrote here. She hit the nail on the head 100%. ... (read in full...)
After 7 years of marriage, I find out she's been with over 100 men!
Q. Last year after 7 years of marriage I overheard my wife saying that she lost count after 100!!! And this was between the ages of 12-18. While I knew she had been with alot, I had asked her when we had gotten serious dating and said 20? 30? her ...
A. 3 November 2008: That's a tough pill to swallow. That's for sure. Its funny. I've only had two girls and my fiance has been with 13 men and I'm going through the very thing you are. I guess its all relative. I'm sure if you and my girl were married you woul... (read in full...)
He's lost his confidence since I cheated on him and I don't like how it has changed his personality
Q. Hi. I'm in a long term relationship and currently engaged to be married in the next couple of years. The thing is, things seem different between me and my partner these days. It seems that over the years our roles have changed somewhat, I used to ...
A. 30 October 2008: Some guys can take these things really hard. I am probably a lot like your boyfriend in this respect. I know I'd be torn up pretty bad about it and honestly don't know if I'd be able to get over it. Were you his first and only? That probably ha... (read in full...)
Letting go of his past
Q. Okay here's the deal. I am 25 years old who is dating a wonderful man (age 29) for a little under a year. Our relationship so far is going wonderfully however there are certain topics that make things very tense. The number of people my boyfri...
A. 30 October 2008: I disagree with Cowboy. I'm a guy and though I have the drive to "sow my wild oats" I kept myself in check becuase I believed that sex was something speacial.
Girls like you are few and far between these days. You have no idea how much respect ... (read in full...)
My wife can't get over my past...
Q. Me and my wife are having a hard time she cant get over my past. Now it seems that every time it seems that we are getting better she just goes back to my past. I admit that before i met her i was out of control I'm in the army and this has been the ...
A. 30 October 2008: I think the problem arises when two people have relatively different pasts.
I'm struggling horribly with my fiance's past and let me tell you. The pain your wife is going through probably runs deep and hurts like hell.
I spent most of my life ... (read in full...)
I love her, but am now questioning how the relationship began...
Q. May of 2006 I stayed at my friends apt for three weeks until I found my own apt for the summer. She is a girl, and we both liked each other at different times in our three year friendship. Almost immediately before I moved in, she was broken u...
A. 22 October 2008: I think that is extremely noble of you. It really shows that you aren't just using her. At the same time. Marraige is way too big of a deal to let this be a deciding factor.
I would get to a point where you are either living on your own or are m... (read in full...)
I can't stop imagining my girlfriend's sexual history. How do I express my feelings to her without making her feel like a slut?
Q. Hello. I have been dating a wonderful girl for a little over a year now. We live together, love each other deeply, and I know she wants to marry me (though I feel we are too young right now to do so). My problem is that over the course of our re...
A. 22 October 2008: "It is also about my own insecurities - sometimes I am bitter that I was not having sex when she was." I know exactly how you feel my friend! I'm in the exact same position as you. Its a horrible feeling. You hate yourself for not getting over her... (read in full...)
I love her, but am now questioning how the relationship began...
Q. May of 2006 I stayed at my friends apt for three weeks until I found my own apt for the summer. She is a girl, and we both liked each other at different times in our three year friendship. Almost immediately before I moved in, she was broken u...
A. 21 October 2008: I don't know how you made it this far. She strung you along for so long. I couldn't do it. The fact that she was willing to have sex with pretty much anyone, but only kiss you when she was drunk is pretty pathetic on her part. You deserve a lot, ... (read in full...)
2 and a half years without sex and we're married!!!
Q. I have been married for 8 years and for the past 2 and half years my wife and I have not had sex, or had any kind of physical contact or intimacy. We have 2 boys, 7 and 2. The last time we had sex was when the last child was conceived. I have tried ...
A. 16 October 2008: I am so sorry. This sounds like every husband's worst nightmare! You deserve better. There are a lot of things a man can do or fail to do to put his wife off of sex, but for her to basically say: "You are fine honey, I just don't want you to touch ... (read in full...)
I'm a newlywed and I can't seem to get aroused by my wife! Advice?
Q. I am a newlywed and I can't seem to get aroused by my wife. I never had a problem with that before we were married. she is gorgeous, and sexy, and I truely love her and enjoy my time with her, and yet I cant seem to get hard, I can however, when i ...
A. 15 October 2008: First of all, I don't think that porn is the whole problem. Something tells me that you are using porn as a crutch. A way to see if everything is still working. Unfortunately its probably having the side effect of conditioning you to only get arou... (read in full...)
I want to stay virgin until marriage but the idea of marrying a girl who will dislike sex is haunting me as I have a high libido. Please advise.
Q. Hello People, This is my first time in here and in any website of the like. I came across your website when researching and I found it nice and friendly so here I am. I am a 28 year old virgin male. It is weird I know but well I like to have s...
A. 6 October 2008: Blackberry008 are you serious? Both men and women get married because they want to settle down and start a family. Liking sex has very little to do with it.
I know plenty of women that got married to just to start a family. They may have acted li... (read in full...)
Did I just make the biggest mistake of my life?
Q. Did I just make the biggest mistake of my life? I got married to a woman I havn't even known for 3 months. I should have thought it through more because this is horrible now. I didnt realize all that came with being married. She is even 6 years ...
A. 1 October 2008: Get out of this relationship before she gets pregnant!
Since she already knows you are thinking about divorce, it would be very easy for her to conveniently forget to take her pill if you know what I mean. Once a child is brought into this worl... (read in full...)
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