How do I keep myself from contacting him?
Q. Oh help me! He is at it again. How do I keep myself from any contact with him - I think I need to be hospitalized! He is texting me again this morning. About what they are doing and their jobs etc. I think it is a desperate attempt from him ...
A. 2 November 2009: Well done and hang in there. You've made a really positive step. You are the strong one in this - he's the weak one that can't give you up so remember that!
Your ex seems to think you've got a lot to offer and I'm sure you do - just don't offer it... (read in full...)
How do I keep myself from contacting him?
Q. Oh help me! He is at it again. How do I keep myself from any contact with him - I think I need to be hospitalized! He is texting me again this morning. About what they are doing and their jobs etc. I think it is a desperate attempt from him ...
A. 29 October 2009: Is the question how can you get him to stop contacting you or how can you stop yourself from responding to him when he contacts you? When I needed to sever ties with an ex I got a new phone number and deleted all his contact details so i wou... (read in full...)
Tips to help you get through the hard times.
Q. This is a bit different to my last article. I’m not sure if you could even call it an article as such. Basically, I want to share a few tips and techniques that I have learned for how to get through difficult times in life. I’ve had plenty of those ...
A. 28 October 2009: I've only just read this article and it's absolutely excellent. From someone who's been there and done that, this advice is spot-on. Especially point 3 - sometimes surviving is all we can do and we shouldn't feel bad about it.
XX... (read in full...)
How do you get out and about and back on the market?
Q. Hey all, I've asked questions here before and always gotten a good response so here goes again. Don't be afraid to be forthright, I'd like the truth. I broke up with a girl a few years ago and realised that I hadnt developed myself as a pe...
A. 28 October 2009: Well done for all the work you've already put in - it sounds like you're doing a great job and doing things right. kc100 gives some great ideas for extending your social circle - especially running clubs, dancing and volunteer work. Activities... (read in full...)
I'm too shy to go to the doctors, what could this personal problem be?
Q. im 17 years old and i have very good personal hygiene but i have a very itchy annal hole which is very annoying, when i scratch it bleeds and looks as if im on my period, when i have a feel i can feel a few pimples up there somedays it so painful ...
A. 28 October 2009: I'm afraid you will have to go and see the doctor as no-one on here is going to be able to diagnose you online. It might be any of the following Thread worms Scabies A small rectal tear or fissure Haemorrhoids (piles) Spots or boils Genital ... (read in full...)
When should I start my birth control pills?
Q. Okay I had unprotected sex about two and a half weeks ago. I've took pregnancy tests and they all came out negative. I went to the clinic to get started on birth control which I chose to take the pills. My period came about a week ago. They also ...
A. 27 October 2009: You should ask the doctor or nurse at the clinic this. Or ask your local pharmacist. Advice in the UK is to start the pill on the 1st day of your period but CHECK THIS as medications and medical advice is often different in different countr... (read in full...)
We have decided to move it together. Good or Bad idea?
Q. Hey i turned 18 last month. Me and my bf have been together for 9months and hes 22 and has a secure well paid job. I live with my mum and sister but everything i have they pick at we dont get along what so ever and i spend majority of time in my ro...
A. 27 October 2009: I think you are a bit young at present to get "married at the wallet" which is what you will be doing if you buy a property together. Since you are still at college it will be your partner who pays for most things (which starts cohabiting life on a ... (read in full...)
Can someone contract diseases such as HIV and others during kissing?
Q. Hi Cupid,I asked question here before and i got a reasonable answer. I appreciate that. my question is, can somebody contact diseases like HIV and others during kissing? it confused me sometimes. i don't know how to kiss and i want to try that. ...
A. 27 October 2009: Kissing is generally fine.
It is possible to contract the herpes virus through kissing. The herpes virus is the virus responsible for cold sores. However, it's usually only transmissable from contact with an open sore and it's usually pretty o... (read in full...)
Condom came off...could I be pregnant?
Q. Hello, My name is jayde and im only 16 and i need help on a question i got to ask okay well me and my boyfriend had sex 2 nights ago and the condom came off inside me and it all went every were is there a possible chance that could make ...
A. 25 October 2009: Yes there is a high chance you could get pregnant if you were in the ovulatory phase of your menstrual cycle. The morning after pill can be taken up to 72 hours after unprotected sex. The coil can also be used for emergency contraception up to 120 ... (read in full...)
Why am I the abused in this relationship?
Q. I am very confused. Currently sleeping on the bathroom floor after being called a liar, being spit on, having multiple small objects thrown at me, and I was the one called the abuser. When I heard him say this, I stepped out of the washroom and...
A. 24 October 2009: This guy is the abuser not you. Get yourself out of there.... (read in full...)
I want group sex with 5 men
Q. I know this might sound crazy, but I have a long-running fantasy to have group sex with 5 men - I guess what you would call a gang bang. I would like it to be 5 men I don't know too well but who have been "pre-screened", maybe by a swingers group ...
A. 24 October 2009: Fantasies are fine but some of them should stay as fantasies! I have some pretty wild ones but I know I simply shouldn't go there. Besides, I don't think the real thing would ever live up to the fantasy.
But it's your life and you're an adult - ... (read in full...)
I'm 15 and online friends with a 40 year old
Q. i recently became online ''friends'' with a man and i think everything heads in the wrong direction.i met him through an online game.he told me he needs someone to explain him the game,so i agreed to help him and added him in the buddy list,as he ...
A. 24 October 2009: I totally agree with Gina on this one. This guy sounds just like a paedophile and if he isn't he's just a sad boring weirdo that you really don't want in your life at any level. Delete and block him now!! And don't feel guilty.
Take care. You soun... (read in full...)
Are my boyfriend's reactions to the abuse he suffered normal?
Q. hi please can anyone tell me if my bf`s behaviour is normal? hes lied so much im startin to wonder what to think. i met him in 07 when he was 34. he told me that between the ages of 12 to 15 he had been sexually abused by his stepfather. the abuse ...
A. 23 October 2009: Unfortunately many sexually abused teens have the added problem to deal with that they felt sexual gratification from the abuse even if they didn't "enjoy" it. Some don't even feel that they were abused until much later in life because their abuser ... (read in full...)
The good ones are taken, the ones who are available I don't want. Is this a normal part of the dating game?
Q. I have been single for 2 years after my divorce. Why is everyone I meet or have a really strong chemistry and connection with is married or has a girlfriend. We end up just being friends, but it's hard because we both know that if he was single we...
A. 23 October 2009: I feel the same way sometimes - but there's nothing wrong with either of us - it's just the nature of the beast. The dating game does seem to get harder as you get older - partly because there's less choice (all the best ones being married/comitted ... (read in full...)
As I leave for work, the only words he has for me: "Are you wearing a dress to make it easier for him?"
Q. I love dresses, I have always loved dresses. My boyfriend of two years, speaks about marriage with me and how he loves me and wants to spend the rest of our lives together. I love him dearly but there are things about him that don't seem...
A. 23 October 2009: This guy has treated you like shit and you need to draw the line NOW! I would have been out of there like a shot as soon as soon as he tried to dictate how I should dress.
This guy is not going to change.... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my pending boob job.
Q. Please help! Im having a boob job done and worried that it will go wrong!Im so scared...
A. 22 October 2009: Listen to oldersister!!! If you really are under 18 a reputable surgeon will not be operating on you. And plastic surgery is always optional. If you're scared, don't go through with it.... (read in full...)
How can I stop masterbating
Q. I plessure my self sometimes but I feel VERY VERY shameful after i'm done. What can I do?? I've tried to stop doing it but its hard not to since I havent had sex for a while. Any advice?? Thanks....
A. 22 October 2009: There's nothing wrong with masturbation. Lots of people do it and there's nothing to feel ashamed about. It's fun, it's relaxing and it's safe. Better to masturbate than sleep with some random person just to relieve sexual frustration... In the wo... (read in full...)
Haven't liked oral in the past -- suggestions?
Q. i was married for 9 yrs. my ex husband went down on me and i didn't feel nothing it was not pleasurable for me. so i don't really care for receiving oral. my current boyfriend wants to perform oral sex on me but i don't let him. this is issue ...
A. 22 October 2009: I think you should try and compromise. I love oral sex but I'm really not keen on "doggy style" - it does nothing for me, it's uncomfortable and sometimes painful. I still do it sometimes though because I know how much my current partner loves it ... (read in full...)
Need good remedies and/or painkillers advice for menstruation!
Q. Hey, this isn't really a relationship problem but I know all the aunts have great advice. The thing is, next week I'm off do do work experience for the whole week during my half term, but I'm due on my period either Sunday/Monday. Like many girls I ...
A. 22 October 2009: I would speak to your doctor anyway. If you are sensible and understand the risks and implications of going on the pill (and possibly having sexual intercourse) you do NOT need your mother's permission, even though you are under 16. Obviously it's ... (read in full...)
How can I explain to him that I need space to get over him?
Q. Hi all, I've just been dumped. Or rather been informed that a friendship is not going to progress any further and I've been knocked for six a bit. I've known this guy for about 5 years because I know other members of his family but he was...
A. 3 October 2009: Thanks folks, you've been helpful. I just really wanted to know that I'm not being unreasonable and that hanging out 4 - 5 times a week isn't "normal" for just friends. I have to see him on Monday - tickets were already booked. Luckily there will be ... (read in full...)
How can I explain to him that I need space to get over him?
Q. Hi all, I've just been dumped. Or rather been informed that a friendship is not going to progress any further and I've been knocked for six a bit. I've known this guy for about 5 years because I know other members of his family but he was...
A. 3 October 2009: Thanks oldersister but the question is not whether I should be "investing" in him - I'm totally aware now that the there is nothing to pursue. The question is how do I strike a happy balance? Totally cutting him out of my life is not an option as it ... (read in full...)
Are you genuinely happy being single? If so why?
Q. Are you single and stuck in your ways? It seems these days that most people only feel complete if they are in a relationship. I will admit I used to feel the same way. And went from one relationship to the other, quite quickly. I have been single n...
A. 3 October 2009: Yeah, pretty much I'm set in my ways and most of the time I'm pretty happy. My downers are usually caused by relationships (or attempts at them)
Best stay single I say!... (read in full...)
Married women: would this creep you out?
Q. OK, I know this question is going to sound creepy to some of you. For the other, more open-minded married women, I’m interested in what you have to say. My wife and I have been together, exclusively, for 25+ years, married for 20+. We have ki...
A. 3 October 2009: I'm not married but I guess it wouldn't freak me out if my husband used my undies that way unless he ruined my favourite pair!
I do think that you and your wife need to talk about this. You can't presume that she knows that once a month is not e... (read in full...)
4 years affair and I don't think he's ever going to leave his wife
Q. first of all im begging you all not to pass moral judgment however tempting it might me,, heres my problem ive been seeing a married man for 4 years..and hes been giving me hopes..that we could be together as his wife had an affair and hes n...
A. 3 October 2009: If this has been going on for 4 years and you've tried talking to him about it and nothing has changed I think it's time to walk away. After 4 years, I think it's unlikely that he will leave his wife, no matter how much he has told you that th... (read in full...)
What kind of flirting do men really like?
Q. What kind of flirting by women do men really like? I mean, what types of things get a man's interest going in a good way, getting him intrigued and attracted, and interested emotionally and physically. I mean as opposed to the stuff that just makes ...
A. 3 October 2009: I'm currently struggling with the same issue myself, dear! I shall read your replies with interest. I have never been able to find the happy medium. Too little flirting and the guy doesn't even notice. Lay it on too thick and he either thinks your a ... (read in full...)
Who was a virgin before our honeymoon, my wife or me?
Q. I was a virgin up until my honeymoon last week. I thought my wife was also a virgin but came to find out otherwise after she and I split a bottle of champagne in the hot tub of our resort. She insisted that no guy could abstain from sex and was ...
A. 28 September 2009: I don't think either of you were virgins. Or maybe you both were. Either way it really isn't worth arguing about. It's in the past. You should be planning your future...... (read in full...)
If you have irregular periods will a pregnancy test be accurate?
Q. hi i have a quick question if u have an irregular period will a pregnancy test show correct? ive done an ultrasound and there is nothing in my uturus..did a pregnacy test came out negative but i have this weird pains here and there in my stomach and ...
A. 28 September 2009: Was this ultrasound taken by a trained professional? They are tricky to read accurately if you have not had specialist training? Did they look for ectopic pregnancy as well? I think you should visit a doctor if you are experiencing pain but still ... (read in full...)
Once I've passed my driving test should I tell my instructor I have a crush on him?
Q. i'm 42 and since january I've been taking driving lessons. my instructor is a lovely man. a brilliant instructor and a wonderful person, kind, gentle, considerate etc etc. we get on very well together and my lessons feel more like time spent with ...
A. 28 September 2009: Find out whether he's married or not or whether he's in a relationship (if you haven't already) If he's not, ask him out for a drink/meal/coffee/delete as appropriate to celebrate once you've passed your test. The worst he can say is a simple no.... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's a jerk, cheated on me 4 X already
Q. this might be hard to explain but i need people's opinions and advice. i had been seeing this guy for 5 month and in that time he cheated on me 4 times and had "pictures" of another girl on his phone. but recently we decided to put the past behind ...
A. 28 September 2009: Don't try and get this guy back - just totally ignore him an hold your head high. Act like that and it wouldn't surprise me if he comes crawling back to you in a little while wanting to get back together. Don't even consider taking him back though - ... (read in full...)
Can you bleed when you're PG and on the pill?
Q. If you are on the pill and you're pregnant, are you still forced to bleed a little when it comes to the pill that starts your period? Just as a matter of interest. ...
A. 28 September 2009: Yes it is perfectly possible to bleed during your pill free break if you continued to take the pill whilst pregnant A menstrual bleed is caused by the lining of the uterus coming away after an unfertilised egg implanted. The bleed that you experie... (read in full...)
How can I control my sexual urges better?
Q. I don't know exactly what I'm asking here, but I'll try to explain it. It's been a while since I've been in a relationship, about a year, and I don't really feel particularly lonely (although I would love to meet someone nice). My problem is that ...
A. 27 September 2009: Your hormones are probably alot to blame. I was celibate for nearly five years and sometimes I thought it'd kill me! I did notice it was worse at certain times of my menstrual cycle - especially ovulation and just before my period was due. Knowing ... (read in full...)
What is the longest time you've survived without seeing your partner?
Q. 1.) What is the longest LDR (long distance relationship you have been in? 2.) Why did it end? 3.) What is the longest time you've survived without seeing your partner?...
A. 27 September 2009: 1) 2 & a half years. Approximately 6 months in the same city (but not the same house) 1 year in different countries (with occasional visits), 1 year in the same country but different cities and we saw each other most weekends.
2) It ended because ... (read in full...)
I have been unwell and none of my friends have asked after me! Should I bring it up with my friends?
Q. I am currently fairly poorly at the moment and have to stay at home for a few days. I have a lovely family around to care for me but what concerns me is that, in my opinion, friends are meant to also ask after me if possible. I have several good ...
A. 25 September 2009: If you've only been sick for a short while I don't think there's a big deal except that you are feeling low in mood because your friends are not behaving in the way you expected them to.
There's not a hard and fast rule of "how to behave when som... (read in full...)
Which guy will bring me the most happiness? Who should I trust the most?
Q. last night my bloke asked me to sleep with him, i said no, by sayin no resulted in him pushin me right by the stairs. i nearly fell down them. do u think he would ever hit me? also i have been reading his comments and it appears that he is meeting ...
A. 25 September 2009: If your current boyfriend has pushed you just because you said you didn't fancy a shag - definitely leave him. Yes, I think there is a strong possibility that he may eventually hit you if you stay with him. It doesn't sound like much of a ... (read in full...)
Opinions please... is this perception correct?
Q. Has anyone noticed that when the males in your life (co-workers, family and friends) have a woman, either had character problems or a mistake was made i.e. there is a problem to be discussed information sought or advice requested. But when a female ...
A. 25 September 2009: I read this question with interest but refrained from commenting at first because I was unsure I'd understood the question. Just to clarify - you have noticed that..
a) if a woman asks a male friend for relationship advice, the answer she will usua... (read in full...)
Does the way I dress scare women?
Q. The reason I ask is because I often get some strange looks from women as I walk past. They often give me a look like they're scared. I'm wondering if its because of the way I dress. I often wear a black coat, usually wear black jeans, have black ...
A. 24 September 2009: Everyone here is giving good advice. Don't feel to concerned about what strangers may be thinking about you - they are after all strangers and you will probably never see them again. What they think of you really doesn't matter - you know what ... (read in full...)
B/f doesn't trust me at all and its driving me bats!
Q. Should i stay or should i go? my boyfriend of 1 year doesn't trust me at all. i don't give him reason not to trust me, i'm very faithful and loving and wouldn't dream of cheating. he accuses me daily of cheating, he genuinly thinks i already have ...
A. 24 September 2009: I went out with a guy just like this and the anonymous female reader is right - there is nothing you can do to change him. He can only change himself. You have two choices - stay and put up with the stauts quo or leave.
If you stay, be aware th... (read in full...)
A family member of mine had a stroke... has anyone else gone through the same thing, and if so, what should I expect?
Q. hello. has anyone had a close family member suffer a stoke? my father had one on sunday night. he has lost the use of his left arm and hand, his speech is slurred but can still make out what he is saying, he can walk aided, and trys to feed ...
A. 26 August 2009: I'm so sorry that this has happened to you. A stroke is caused by either bleeding or a blood clot in the brain. The brain is a really complex organ and different parts control different activities so it's very difficult to advise you on what exactly ... (read in full...)
What are the Do's and Don'ts when meeting your partners parents for the first time? I'm new to this and really nervous!
Q. I'm a South African who has been dating a German guy for almost a year. We've lived together for almost a year as well. We both live in Dubai. Next week we are going to Germany for a month-long vacation and I am also meeting his parents for the ...
A. 26 August 2009: At least you know that you and his parents already have one thing in common - you think their son is wonderful! Make sure you tell them that - how kind/fun/caring/etc he is and that they must be very proud.Listen to their stories about him and look ... (read in full...)
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