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... Send *rimson_kiss a private message | | | *rimson_kiss's profile:Hello friends. Thank you for reading about me. I am a 34 year old single mother, with 2 girls. One is 8 yrs old and the other is about to turn 1.
The only experiences I can pull from to help others is what I have lived through. I know, big shocker, my life has not been all roses and rainbows. I have dealt with domestic violence, being cheated on, trust issues, emotional abuse, self esteem issues, infertility, and some sexual issues as well. It doesn't make me an expert by any stretch of the imagination, but I have survived it and maybe I can help someone else survive as I did!
I have found the best way to work through the issues I am having in my own personal life, is to reach out and help others who need it. I know how frustrating it can be to search your mind for days and never find the answers you are seeking.
If anyone of you ever has an issue that you are not comfortable with asking publicly, my box is always open to you. I may not give the best advice around, but I will give my opinion on the matter and do my best to be a good guide specific to your situation.
Many blessings of happiness!!
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I'm craving the life I had, but not to get back with my ex.
Q. I was in a realtionship for five years from the age of 15. I ended it about five months ago, I felt we'd grown apart but also had feelings for a boy who was also my friend. Things didn't work out with that, and I felt so hurt and let down. I ...
A. 3 April 2009: If you want back the life you once had, you are going to have to work for it. Get out, find a therapist for the anxiety and depression and take this time to work on yourself. Adjusting to life on your own is tough, but with the right support system ... (read in full...)
Where is this going? Do I still have a chance to make this work?
Q. Can someone give me an advice on what to do? I have met this man in 1999; in 2001 I gave birth to his child a baby boy. I always loved him and I still have feelings for this man. I love him so much and never stop thinking about him, it has been ...
A. 3 April 2009: Why settle for being second? NO WAY! Walk now or you will continue to hurt more and more and he KNOWS he can do that to you because you are letting him.... (read in full...)
Surely this is what relationships are meant to be like?
Q. My boyfriend makes me feel so unhappy with myself. With his comments. I feel so low and have low self esteem and wonder who will want me if we spilt as I'm the kind of person who needs to feel loved and secure. But I'm not with him and it's an ...
A. 3 April 2009: I understand that ill feeling you get in the pit of your stomach. Dearie, he is not treating you right in the least. He wants to know you are there waiting for him to come around to you, and he is out having the time of his life. His put downs ar... (read in full...)
How can he go from hot to cold?
Q. I have been seeing this guy for 4 months. Everything was going so great. Just a couple of weeks ago he was talking about where things were headed, meaning a relationship. He talked about being in love and things were going that way very fast, etc. ...
A. 3 April 2009: When he talked about his feelings in reference to the relationship and where it was heading, what did you say back to him? That makes all the difference in the world! If you did not respond positively to it, he took it as rejection and moved on. He ... (read in full...)
How can I end this friendship?
Q. Afternoon all. I need some advice with how to end a friendship. I met my friend 10 years ago..when we worked together and we always kept in touch after i left..her doing most of the chasing and phoning. Shortly after she got pregnant and ask...
A. 3 April 2009: You have a problem, my dear. you say you never considered her a close friend but you said yes to being Godmother to her child??
Now you are considering ending the friendship for one reason or another. What about the child? You leave the frie... (read in full...)
Why are my stretch marks itching?
Q. ok im 17 and im a mother to a 18 month old and i have stretch marks on my lower stomach and for some reason they have been itching for the past week or so and their turning red and its only like three of them thats doing it, i tried looking it up ...
A. 3 April 2009: You are normal to have your stretch marks itch, any woman who has had a child knows they do itch sometimes. Use lotion or oil to soothe the skin. If that does not do the trick, you could see your doctor or a dermatologist for further evaluation.... (read in full...)
Do normal couples have private social networking profiles? (Facebook, myspace)
Q. Privacy or secrecy?? Just wondering in a normal relationship (married or long-term) do partners have private or secret emails or profiles? I have been with my partner for almost three years and he is adament that it is okay for him to have a ...
A. 3 April 2009: My man and I have our own accounts as well, but we do not set our stuff to private. What is there to hide? If he is keeping things private, there is a reason behind it. I would investigate the reason. Ask him straight out why he is hiding things. ... (read in full...)
I don't think I have a future with him... am I right?
Q. Hi, I don't know if I like this guy?? He is a friend I guess we are close, we've known each other for 3 years yet I just feel I don't know him. I feel he's desperate for sex or whatever, he always speaks to me about gals and how hot they are and ...
A. 3 April 2009: One big sign is that he is still looking at other women. This is a sure sign that he is not moving forward in your relationship TOGETHER. You probably want something different than he does. Talk to him and ask what direction he sees you and him ... (read in full...)
Nothing I do is good enough for him!
Q. Please helpe me...I'm 23 and my husband 25. We've been married for almost 4yrs. He works from 7 to 3 mon.-fri.and I'm a stay @ home mom for our almost 3 year old son.and we have been living on our own house he bout for a year now. It sounds good so ...
A. 3 April 2009: I know this situation, listen, get some friends together, even for play dates with you and your son.
Your husband sounds like he wants a maid and mother, not a WIFE. Doesn't he help out at all? I would tell him you are doing the best you can and ... (read in full...)
Am I supposed to shave down there?
Q. I'm a virgin and I've never been fingered or anything. This is really embarrassing but am I supposed to shave down there and if so how much? all?...
A. 3 April 2009: This is all YOUR decision, not a man's. No man on earth should tell a woman what to do with her body.
Whatever you feel most comfortable with doing, then go for it. I enjoy the feeling of being well trimmed as opposed to fully bare. I have bee... (read in full...)
I'm stuck with a man that takes advantage of my weakness
Q. I am a 38yr. old mother of 6, 4 of my children from my present boyfriend. We have been together almost 9 yrs. Ever since I can remember, my boyfriend has cheated on me, at least with 2 or 3 or more women for every yr we've been together. You're...
A. 3 April 2009: Time to take your life back from HIM. He knows you will take whatever he gives you and like it. I agree, you have to UNSTICK yourself and your children from this situation. It will never get better and even if he says it will, can you trust in what ... (read in full...)
Is sex all he's after with me?
Q. Hi. Just to jump straight into it. I recently got involved with a guy. We met a few times in unrelated circumstances and after I admitted I had feelings towards him. To my suprise he reciprocated. Our 'relationship' since has purely been online as ...
A. 3 April 2009: I have to agree with Denny, just because he has a ton of women that he adds to his network does not mean he is trying to sleep with them all. It could be that he prefers the friendship of females rather than males.
Opposite sex friendships are very... (read in full...)
In love with my best friend but she doesn't feel the same way. Should I still be friends with her?
Q. Hi there. I'm guy who has fallen in love with his best friend (female). We've known each other since grade school, and are in our 20's now, so its been over 10 years that we've known each other. I've always been attracted to her, but never really ...
A. 2 April 2009: You are more than welcome. I wish you luck in this endeavor. If you need to message me because you don't want to post publicly, my inbox is always open!... (read in full...)
I love him and I wish I didn't!
Q. Ok thankyou to anyone that can help! I swear i've ruined my life. I don't know how to get over him! Thing is ive liked this lad nearly 2 years now and yes all through this i thought he liked me...so did afew others but he doesn;t and hes tol peop...
A. 2 April 2009: You already have your answer that he is not going to be with you. Now you have to bring yourself to the realization that you have to move forward. If it takes for you to stop hanging around with the same crowd of people for awhile, so be it. Try to ... (read in full...)
In love with my best friend but she doesn't feel the same way. Should I still be friends with her?
Q. Hi there. I'm guy who has fallen in love with his best friend (female). We've known each other since grade school, and are in our 20's now, so its been over 10 years that we've known each other. I've always been attracted to her, but never really ...
A. 2 April 2009: To answer you, its probably a combination of a lot of things. Yes, she is afraid of losing you. If you get into a relationship with her and things don't work out, do you honestly believe you could go back to being the kind of friends you are now?
I... (read in full...)
I love him..but I feel I'm waiting for nothing!!
Q. My ex boyfriend and i had real intense passion. I love him still . But as far as being together we never work because he isnt ready 4 commitment! Hes 30 im 26. Two years we were together and no one has made me laugh so much cos he so clever and ...
A. 2 April 2009: Don't wait around. It's pointless. You said there are plenty of others that ask you out, what in the world is stopping you? You are waiting around while he out playing the field. An "i love you" is not enough to keep a woman happy. He either needs ... (read in full...)
Advice please... Does size matter?
Q. Do good looking guys fancy plain looking girls? Do tall thin guys fancy small heavy girls because I am 5ft2"....
A. 2 April 2009: I can sum this up in one phrase "TO EACH HIS OWN!". Everyone is attracted to others for their own reasons. Don't be so worried about fitting into what you feel is the "norm" of what a man wants. BE YOU, that's all you can be!... (read in full...)
He's a control freak!
Q. Well i've been dating my boyfriend for a long time now. And it's just getting worse and worse. In the beggining everything couldn't have been more perfect. But now it's like he's a control freak. Everytime I want to go out and hangout with my twin ...
A. 2 April 2009: The control he is putting on you is because not only of his OWN past, but because of his insecurities. Tell him you cant handle it and if he can't trust you with the things you do or say, then there is no point in going any farther. He needs to back ... (read in full...)
Do I need to go on with my life? or wait on him?
Q. I don't know what to do with the relationship that I'm in. This man that I'm involve with I don't really know where I stand with him because he is playing games and he know I love him too. This is what he has been doing lately. When I be in the club ...
A. 2 April 2009: The hurt you feel will go away and yes it does take time. Go out and have some fun with friends or family. Being in love with someone who does not respect you can be difficult, but you cannot force him to respect you or even love you in return. ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend never gets jealous!
Q. hey all. i just want to ask the guys a question. my boyfriend of two years neva gets jealous and that hurts. i end up wondering if he really loves me. am i bieng silly or oi have a reason to be worried?...
A. 2 April 2009: Some guys, no matter what happens, never get jealous. I would take it as a wonderful sign that he has total trust in you and the things you do! Jealousy usually plays out when there is a trust issue. You are not being silly in the least, but I wo... (read in full...)
Do I need to go on with my life? or wait on him?
Q. I don't know what to do with the relationship that I'm in. This man that I'm involve with I don't really know where I stand with him because he is playing games and he know I love him too. This is what he has been doing lately. When I be in the club ...
A. 2 April 2009: Why would you want to be with someone who shows you NO RESPECT? Please, respect yourself, call the ingrate, tell him yourself its over and wash your hands of it all. Don't sit around and wait for him to tell you what you already know. If he wanted ... (read in full...)
I feel like I ruined my life and disappointed everyone
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend on and off for 4 years. I THOUGHT we had a great relationship until a few months ago. We had alot of unprotective sex (he knew I wasn't on the pill but said sex felt beter with out a condom) I'm now 18 weeks ...
A. 2 April 2009: I am so sorry you are going through this right now, at such a young age as well. He's a total loser and you are better off without him, first and second any man who would say "get rid of it" is not a MAN to begin with.
So, you made a bad choi... (read in full...)
We made out but then she said it wasn't right and its messing with my head!
Q. oh my god, my head about to burst. i made out with my friend and i dont know whats happening. We went out, came bk and kissed, it started to get very heated than she stopped because she kept saying it didnt feel right! she said it but carried on, ...
A. 2 April 2009: Very confusing situation. You and her need to have a real face to face talk and discuss where this is going to go, if anywhere. She is afraid of losing the friendship, and that is understandable. She has confided so much in you that if you two ... (read in full...)
Can someone help me stay strong and keep my word...to leave this guy alone?
Q. hey aunts i finally did it...i broke it off with the committed guy...it's been two days and i almost fell in today but by the grace of God ive stayed strong and haven't contacted him... this is how i did it: i called him with the thought of us me...
A. 2 April 2009: GOOD for you. You did the right thing in breaking it off and showing respect for their relationship (yep, even if he doesn't). It sounds like you have more respect for yourself as well to not be pulled back into the situation and used.
Best ... (read in full...)
Hormonal changes in women during their period... quick poll!
Q. Quick poll: when a gal goes on her period: -Guys: does it happen that she can become difficult to deal with? As in, she's much shorter tempered and you can agitate her more easily? -Gals: do you tend to get short with people including your o...
A. 2 April 2009: Each woman is completely different. I, personally, used to have a harder time with the hormonal changes when I was on the pill. For some reason I would get more agitated when I was on them then when I was off.
Since having my second child, m... (read in full...)
Interest? Or just friendship?
Q. If my team mate in college whom I'm moderately close to always smiles when he sees or talks to me (my friends observe that). Generally in a group he would single me out to talk or ask random questions sometimes. And when there's a group joke or ...
A. 2 April 2009: Do you like him? cause the signs of him taking an interest in you are all there. Some men don't know just how to come out and say it. He could be shy, so go easy on him. If you really want the answer on whether he likes you or not, just ask. I ... (read in full...)
Should I go see a doctor about this itchniness?
Q. I lost my virginity just over a month ago and we never used protection. I know it was a stupid mistake. I have had my period but i have had excess of clear fluid and it can be itchy at times. Is this normal or should I go and see a doctor? ...
A. 2 April 2009: By all means get yourself to the doc ASAP. Please be careful in the future and ALWAYS use a condom.... (read in full...)
I need help!!! I'm on birth control but don't use condoms... is this bad!
Q. Ok.. so my boyfreind and I have been together 7 months and we are sexually active.. I'm on birth control and we don't use condoms.... he cums in me every time. We are protected with the birth control but are we still at risk??? I need help!...
A. 2 April 2009: Are you more concerned about pregnancy or your risk of STD's?
Taking the pill is a great method of birth control, but does zilch for you with protection from STD's.
If you are concerned about STD's then by all means get yourself to a dr... (read in full...)
He won't give oral unless I shave and I really don't want to!
Q. For a while when my boyfriend and i started dating i went down on him almost everytime we had sex and in between, expecting to get some oral lovin as well, but i got nothing. When i finally asked him to go down on me he said he doesn't really like ...
A. 2 April 2009: I totally agree with your stand on this. He wants, but wont give? NO WAY! Bedroom activities should be a two way street and it sounds as though he just doesn't care about your needs and desires. If he really gave a lick (pardon the pun) he would do ... (read in full...)
Uncomfortable silences happen on the on the phone..how do I stop them?
Q. I have a pen pal who I exchange emails quite often. I call him on the phone very rarely b/c we are long distance. When I call him there are moments in which we are just silent, so I get nervous and cut it short so we hang up quickly. I want to ...
A. 2 April 2009: How about before you make that phone call put a pen and paper to work for you!
Write down little ideas or questions you might want to talk about, write them down as you think of them during the day and then when you do make the call and are at a... (read in full...)
Friends don't like my boyfriend but I feel hurt and in love
Q. I need help! a lot of help. Well me and my x bf have been on and off for a year. my friends hate it but im really happy even though im hurt when we break up. He says the sweatest things and i feel like my friends dont see the side of him that i do. ...
A. 2 April 2009: Being on an emotional roller coaster is very difficult to handle. The main thing you need to worry about is YOU. How do you feel? I understand your friends are only wanting the best for you, but in reality only you know what is best for you.
If th... (read in full...)
I have slept with my best friend in the past, and my fiance has no clue
Q. I am 32 and have been dating my boyfriend for 6 years. We have had our ups and downs and I have caught him cheating three times (but who knows how many times he has actually cheated?). He used to put me down regularly and I am not happy with our ...
A. 2 April 2009: I have to agree with Gina. It is bound to come out sooner or later with as close as your best friend and boyfriend are. Do yourself a favor and just come clean. Living with this built up inside is bound to be torture, especially because you see not ... (read in full...)
Taken girl with a lot of male friends...
Q. I used to be friends with a ton of girls, but there was a bunch of stupid drama so I became friends with mostly males by the end of high school. I'd hang around them and just chill and play video games or eat or something. When I got to college, got ...
A. 1 April 2009: IF your BF is having trouble with you having male friends, why not ask him to tag along with you and the male friends and show him what you guys do when you hang out. It might make him feel a bit more secure in it. Guys and Girls really can JUST ... (read in full...)
Do we need to use protection and should I ask him to be tested?
Q. Do we need to use protection? Me and my boyfriend fool around, lately naked. We don't actually have intercourse, he just insterts his penis in the opening not inside, he doesn't ehh cum or anything, he has been sexually active before with at least ...
A. 1 April 2009: First off, yes, he and you should be tested. Second, ALWAYS use a condom. Take it from my past experience, you just never know these days. If his penis is coming into contact with you, you should be protected. Also, if he is inserting his penis even ... (read in full...)
Am I bisexual?
Q. Hi guys, So, one night i was out with my fiance and we bumped into our gym crew in a club. My fiance was so drunk that night i was really embarrassed and let him do his own thing. My gym instructor (who's female) was stood in the corner moving to...
A. 11 March 2009: Then maybe its also time to have a talk with the instructor as well. Tell her that you have noticed these things and would like clarification. At least you will know where you stand!... (read in full...)
What should I do when I first meet him? Hug? Say hey?
Q. im a 18 year old guy and im planning to go on a date with a 23 year old guy, i just dont know how to approach him when i meet him? hug? just a simple hey? what should i do when i first meet him? we have been set on a blind date by our friends... b...
A. 11 March 2009: A handshake is always welcomed, but if you feel that is too informal, then I would go for the hug. Hugs are a wonderful ice breaker not only for you, but the other person as well! GOOD LUCK!... (read in full...)
We broke up because I found out he already had a g/f, now he promises me he will soon be only mine, do I take him back?
Q. please help me... im completely devastated, but im sure you get a few of us... i was seeing a guy. which i only lately found out that he had a gf of 8 yrs, and then he explained to me that he wanted to leave her but couldnt in his attempts cause she ...
A. 11 March 2009: Get out of this situation fast. Its not good for you in any direction. I would agree that if he wanted to leave her, he would have long ago regardless of the threats. YOU should not be subject to being in the middle of this or him treating you as a ... (read in full...)
We broke up because I found out he already had a g/f, now he promises me he will soon be only mine, do I take him back?
Q. please help me... im completely devastated, but im sure you get a few of us... i was seeing a guy. which i only lately found out that he had a gf of 8 yrs, and then he explained to me that he wanted to leave her but couldnt in his attempts cause she ...
A. 11 March 2009: Get out of this situation fast. Its not good for you in any direction. I would agree that if he wanted to leave her, he would have long ago regardless of the threats. YOU should not be subject to being in the middle of this or him treating you as ... (read in full...)
Am I bisexual?
Q. Hi guys, So, one night i was out with my fiance and we bumped into our gym crew in a club. My fiance was so drunk that night i was really embarrassed and let him do his own thing. My gym instructor (who's female) was stood in the corner moving to...
A. 11 March 2009: Well, sweetie, I think you might have just answered your own question. You could be curious too. Have a talk with your boyfriend and explain it just like you did here. Tell him that you are satisfied with him, but are interested in exploring what it ... (read in full...)
First time sex hurts my girlfriend too much, help!
Q. I need some urgent help on this matter. Me and my girlfriend just started having sex (mind you we are both virgins) and we there are some obstacles in the way. The first couple nights we tried I was really nervous and having performance anxiety so ...
A. 11 March 2009: Anxiety with your first time is normal. Yes, even the pain is normal. Did you make sure that she was adequately prepared for this? What I mean is, did she have enough lubrication? Even the most experienced sex can be painful if there is not enough ... (read in full...)
Am I bisexual?
Q. Hi guys, So, one night i was out with my fiance and we bumped into our gym crew in a club. My fiance was so drunk that night i was really embarrassed and let him do his own thing. My gym instructor (who's female) was stood in the corner moving to...
A. 11 March 2009: This question is real easy to answer. Look inside yourself and ask this question....Am I sexually aroused by MEN as well as WOMEN? If the answer is Yes, then you could be more than just curious, you could very well be Bi_sexual in nature.... (read in full...)
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