A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need some urgent help on this matter. Me and my girlfriend just started having sex (mind you we are both virgins) and we there are some obstacles in the way. The first couple nights we tried I was really nervous and having performance anxiety so it wasn't even fully erected enough to try. The third and fourth night I was able to get in but she forced me out with her legs because it hurt too bad. She is really upset that it is hurting her and I am really unsure what needs to be done at this point. We didn't really even do much the fourth time was the furthest we went probably only 30 seconds and she couldn't do no more.. not to mention she kept pulling me out.Please Help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe actually are using KY Jelly
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2009): being new at it, just relax. talk. take it slow. lots of foreplay. maybe get some ky jelly too, just in case. relax though. it will work out.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2009): FOREPLAY, FOREPLAY, FOREPLAY..... Play rather than penetrate.
Forget about penetrative sex, at the moment, it sounds so mechanical and not very fun. Go back to kissing and touching each other. Massage with oil is very good and it gets both of you used to each other's bodies. By kissing and caressing you both should become hot and aroused, then penetration will happen much more naturally.
If your girlfriend is sure she wants to have sex, then stroke her legs when she tightens up and tell her romantic comforting words. At the moment, you both are in a hurry, and not relaxed enough to get the job done. Have more fun during sex and the rest should follow naturally.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe do engage in foreplay. But since it is new to us we get distracted by putting the condom on and getting in position.
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A
male
reader, achilles95 +, writes (11 March 2009):
 Alright well its natural for your girlfriend to feel pain the first two times. But the third time it shouldn't hurt that much. Maybe you should use more lube and start going slower when you stick it in. I hope was some kind of help
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A
female
reader, crimson_kiss +, writes (11 March 2009):
 Anxiety with your first time is normal. Yes, even the pain is normal. Did you make sure that she was adequately prepared for this? What I mean is, did she have enough lubrication? Even the most experienced sex can be painful if there is not enough lubrication. Also...go SLOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. This is not a race. Take it slowly and eventually it will get better.
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