My estranged mother's funeral....the worst situation I will ever allow myself to be in...
Q. I had not spoken to my parents or their families for some years. To cut a long story short - I spoke out about being abused as a child by my father and they all took my father's side - my ex husband and his family included??? I was cut out from ...
A. 12 October 2011: I was abused as child, not by my father though it was my brother who is 13 years older than me, i know how hard the situation can be. Your family has made it harder by not believing you and for that I am sorry. As for the funeral of your mother you ... (read in full...)
I'm attracted to a girl I knew 8 years ago, now I'm friends with her on Facebook should I contact her? What should I say?
Q. as the titles say attracted to a girl i knew 8 years ago who i recently added on facebook, how do i speak to her? i used to be in her form and she actually asked me out (7-8 years ago) but i declined now i find her extremly attractive looking at ...
A. 10 October 2011: I added a guy on facebook that I had knows 5 years previously and had lost contact with. We had liked each other before we had lost contact and I thought he may have forgotten me, or would think it strange to get contacted to randomly by me again. I ... (read in full...)
My mom thinks my BF is abusive, but he's not!
Q. I have been dating my bf for about 8 months now.My parents don't really like him because when he was 17 he and a bunch of friends broke into a cottage, threw a party and the place got trashed. He got house arrest and had to do community service. My ...
A. 9 October 2011: Sit down and talk honestly with your Mum. Also make sure that you also let her know that you appreciate she is concerned for you and you know that she loves you, but that her constant questioning and accusations are causing you stress. You are at ... (read in full...)
I've been there for her. Yet she doesn't want others to know about me. Is there anything worth waiting for in all this, for me?
Q. what does my ex want from me? my ex and I broke up years ago, we decided to stay friends, but it seem to me at cost. it seem ok at first but i began to wonder, over the years, she dated other people, and so have i. but i think i put myself in toubl...
A. 8 October 2011: I think it's great you want to be friends with your ex, but sometimes it's just not a good idea, and I'm sorry to say that with this woman it is not a good idea. I agree with blonde30s, lose contact with her completely, and forget about her. You ... (read in full...)
My Dad asked me to tell a serious lie. I feel bad about that. Should I cut contact with him?
Q. Hey everyone so its been awhile since i have been on here but i could really use some help, so this morning my dad called me and he lives six hours away from me and i only see him once in a great while and he asked me if i could do a favor for him ...
A. 8 October 2011: Talk to your Dad, and tell him that you don't want to be put in that position again as you felt very uncomfortable. I will tell you that most people have done this in their life whether they are male or female, the lie being about your brother was ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to still be a virgin at 22?
Q. Um ... I am writing this because I am not sure if it's normal. I am a young female (22 years old), kind of tall, OK-looking .. and I've never been asked out. Like .. ever. I was recently having a casual conversation w/ some of my peers...
A. 5 October 2011: I was a virgin until I was 24,nothing wrong with it at all. As for guys not liking a girl approaching them or asking them out, In my exoerience, I asked my boyfriend out and made the first initial move to take our friendship into relationship and he ... (read in full...)
Checked my boyfriend's facebook account and found emails from the past that I don't like!
Q. Hi all. I have been with my bf for almost two years. I suffer from terrible insecurity and have often wondered if he has cheated. Anyway, I know it’s wrong but I decided to check his facebook account. I found nothing untoward in the last two years ...
A. 1 October 2011: Firstly your right you shouldn't have looked. That being said, yes you are being silly, On a first date you expect them to be unsure, it is the getting to know and possibility of something, it's not a certainty that it will develop into something ... (read in full...)
Ladies, which do you prefer - the cook or the dancer?
Q. Just out of curiosity to all the women out there, which do you prefer - a man who knows his way around the kitchen or a man who knows his way around the dance floor? And why? (I'm just taking a poll of sorts after an interesting discussion among...
A. 28 September 2011: A man who can cook is for me, as long as he cleans up after himself lol. I find it extremely sexy if he can cook, that way I don't always have to do it all the time. ... (read in full...)
Did she lie to me about being a virgin?
Q. hi.. M 22yrs old n my g.f is 18.. She told me that she is a virgin but when we had sex.. She got such tight pussy but she didnt bleed but felt pain in another day.. She never played any sport nor cycle.. Is she lying to me? Plz tell me sm1.. Shall i ...
A. 27 September 2011: trust her, I didn't bleed my first time, and I know that my hymen was in tact as a doctor confirmed it for other reason's. Not all women bleed their first time, so you should trust her.... (read in full...)
B/f wants me to move to where he is and I can't do it!
Q. Dear Aunts, We just had a fight. My boyfriend got so furious seeing me talking to another guy on facebook. I wasn't doing anything wrong, and plus this guy is way younger than I am. So I defended myself and said that he should have put his tru...
A. 27 September 2011: I think the fight is more about the fact that you won't move to be with him and the frustration of him not having enough money to be able to move to where you are. Long distance is very hard and frustrating, I know because I am in one myself. The ... (read in full...)
Why do people expect their significant others to stop seeing the mother/father of their child even though they are together?
Q. Hi, I have seen alot of questions on this site an also on TV and once with my aunt. Why do people expect their bf/gf/husband/wife/fiance to stop seeing the mother/father of their child because they're together? For example, lets say a girl and a bo...
A. 27 September 2011: Some people want to be the one who comes first with their partner, even though they are with someone who has a child. It is unrealistic and usually only leads to problems in the relationship. Yes a father has a right to see his child, and the child ... (read in full...)
Desperate--I think I've just pushed our relationship too far
Q. It's been one year since our first date. He has been faithful to me, but I've often wondered if we were a relationship of convenience for loneliness and companionship. I haven't felt that I was his precious girlfriend consistently. I'm afraid I ...
A. 27 September 2011: It sounds like you tend to overthink things and tend to get carried away with any doubts that may come into your mind. I know that I have a tendency to be the same way, and it is hard not to do this. I have found in my relationship that once I sat ... (read in full...)
Can this be a relationship? He is straight and I am gay. He's a co-worker.
Q. i would like to ask help or advice regarding my relationship to my co-worker. i am so very confused about our relationship because between the two of us there is a mutual understanding between our friendship. probably he knows that i care for him ...
A. 26 September 2011: If he is straight I don't see that it can be a relationship as anything more than friends, he can no more make himself attracted to guys, than you can make yourself attracted to women. I would say value the friendship you have with him, and try to ... (read in full...)
I cannot ignore my former LDR any more. I took a risk. Was this the right way to reconnect with him?
Q. Five months ago, I told a long-distance love (I live in LA; he's from San Fran) that I couldn't do it anymore. Mainly, because he would constantly tell me he missed me and wanted to see me, yet wouldn't follow through. Granted, we only dated six ...
A. 26 September 2011: yes you did the right thing. I went through a similar situation with a LDR late last year where I just couldn't ignore the feelings anymore, I told him how I felt with no expectations at all except to find closure to the "what if" question. We are ... (read in full...)
How would I go about approaching you and how could I get the conversation flowing?
Q. I'm turning 18 in a few weeks so I am looking to go out and meet new people. However, I'm rubbish at actually doing this. In a group of males I'm fine because we all have common ground sports, girls, games etc. When it comes to chatting to new ...
A. 26 September 2011: I have found that I respond better to a man when he walks up to me and says hi my name is _____ what's yours? It's the best way to go every time. Then just ask questions about her, it should work.... (read in full...)
She wants me to visit her in USA. She does not know I had a criminal record in the past which may prevent me getting a visa
Q. A month ago I got a letter from a female I met in Florida back in 2003. Truth be told,I have always wondered what could have been. I have been invited over. Her family are bending over backwards for me. My problem being,I have a criminal record. It ...
A. 26 September 2011: My suggestion is contact the embassy and ask them questions about if it would affect your chances. Also tell her honestly about it. I know from experience that when I started seeing my current man he was in a situation which may prevent him from ... (read in full...)
He's turned it around to try to make me the guilty one!
Q. Here's the thing. I had my boyfriend of nine months. Well about 2 months ago I started noticing little things/clues that were telling me that he was talking to another girl, like a text every so often and he would say it was this app that he has ...
A. 26 September 2011: My so called ex did that to me before I ever found out he was cheating. They try to make you out to be the bad guy so they don't have to admit to themselves that they are scum. You are better off without him, even though it may not feel that way ... (read in full...)
If we form a living arrangement he says he will only help with the food bill. Is this fair?
Q. Im a 46 years old woman just divorced my husband. I have got my own house and a part time job but earning just enough to support myself. I've met this man 16 years my senior and we gets on well and we've been together for 3 years. He has a good job ...
A. 24 September 2011: He should pay half of all living expenses, including the utilities and whatever payments required for living on the premises. I suggest that you have a talk with him and make it clear that he has to pay half of all bills, otherwise you will be the ... (read in full...)
For the ladies who have been cheated on or have divorced parents: how do u deal with a new guy in your life and what is your reaction?
Q. This is directed at ladies who have been cheated on or have divorced parents. In a very broad sense, it is for those ladies who have been "broken'. I understand you ladies have a general disdain and cynicism when it comes to dating. My question is, ...
A. 23 September 2011: I have been cheated on before and I tended to make the guy "work" to show me that he really wanted me and wasn't playing games with me. I wasn't exactly cruel just overly cautious, and sometimes that seemed cold. The thing is that it hurts and ... (read in full...)
How do I stop feeling a tiny bit betrayed about LDR boyfriend's actions?
Q. Yesterday evening, my LDR boyfriend from on the Continent met up with one of his female friends for a bite to eat and a couple of drinks. For a laugh, they decided to sneak into the place where he works since they weren't too far away and he has a ...
A. 15 September 2011: I am in a long distance relationship, and it is normal to feel a bit jealous when other people get to do things with them that you wish you could do with them like in this instance for you. In this case I think that is all it is, but the main thing ... (read in full...)
My best friend's ex is in love with me. What should I do?
Q. What do I do? My best buddy's ex girlfriend is in love with me. I think she dumped him so she could be with me! The catch is, I actually really like her! But, I also like my best friend (not in a gay way of course). Idk what to do? She wants me to ...
A. 14 September 2011: I think before doing anything you should talk to your best friend and see what he says. Then you can decide whether it will affect your friendship with him if you get involved with his ex, and you can at least be informed before you make any ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is going on a trip with 3 girls, one is his ex!
Q. My boyfriend has just told me he is going to London for the weekend with 3 other girls, and possibly another. He will be the omly boy. One of these girls is his ex girlfriend- who he is.close to and she is.newly single. The girl who's birthday it is ...
A. 11 September 2011: I would talk to him and tell him calmly and honestly that your not ok with it and how it is making you feel. ... (read in full...)
Women: Is a gentle heart, or rather a fundamental aversion to violence and conflict, just a completely unattractive trait for a man?
Q. I am at heart a very mild person. I do not like conflict. Violence, of any kind, is simply unnatural to me, and goes completely against my nature. I grew up in a suburb where violence was never part of our daily lives. Sure, some kids chose to ...
A. 7 September 2011: For me no it is not a deal breaker, I find it very attractive. I have had a boyfriend who would willingly fight anyone for me over the slightest thing, and it really annoyed me, and caused me to end the relationship. I would rather a man who can ... (read in full...)
Am I the only person who doesn't like casual sex?
Q. Firstly, I want to say that to those whose opinions vary from mine- I respect your choice and this is not meant to be 'anti-promiscious' in general, even if I personally am for my life. I am 25 and in my first year of college. I am loving it her...
A. 7 September 2011: I don't believe in casual sex either, and I know quite a few other's who don't either. At the end of the day it's a personal thing. Stick to your beliefs and you will meet the girl of your dreams.
... (read in full...)
Why do girls say they want a nice guy, when we all know that is a load of crap?
Q. The past 5 girls i have talked to, i have asked them the same question. What qualities do you like best in a man? Amazingly they all said as long as hes nice idk...... really? i have people tell me i am too nice , that im the nicest guy they ever ...
A. 7 September 2011: I am with a nice guy, and very happy indeed. the problem is that usually when girls are younger they really have no idea what they want. I know that I followed a lot of the relationship advice people who said make a list of must have's and must not ... (read in full...)
During sex I "zone out" and think of anyone but him. Yet I love him. Did my past issues affect my ability to enjoy sex with him now?
Q. I think I have some intimacy issues. I love my boyfriend very much, I am extremely attracted to him and we have sex on a regular basis (1-2 times a day). The only thing is, when we have sex I am never able to think about him or what is happenin...
A. 6 September 2011: I was sexually abused by a close relative when I was a child also, and for a long time before I got through counseling, I did the same thing that you describe. It is a safety mechanism that a lot of people who have been abused develop and ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my friend the truth??
Q. ok my "friend" has a girlfriend and i am madly in love with her. I told her my feelings and she didn't say she didn't like me or nothing will every happen but my friend has a little instinct that i like her as he has told her that and she told me. ...
A. 4 September 2011: I think your on shaky ground here. If you tell your friend how you feel about his girlfriend, it will most likely ruin the friendship. You told her how you felt and she didn't tell you she didn't like you, but she didn't tell you that she did either ... (read in full...)
Why is he so committed and so confident that our LDR can last the distance until we can be together?
Q. I'm in an LDR relationship which has gone on for about two years. We have met and want to see each other again. Problem is, there is a huge distance between us, and it will be another four years perhaps even longer until we can live closer to e...
A. 4 September 2011: I am in a LDR and in my opinion his optimism does show that he does love you. Even so there needs to be a plan in place, something that you can work towards together. Just waiting to see what plans will magically appear won't work. LDR's are hard ... (read in full...)
LDR thats getting hard to handle, what do I do?
Q. I know this is probably one of the most asked questions, but I would still like to hear other peoples opinion. I have a long distance relationship with this guy, and we've been together for quite a few months now. But anyway, I don't know what ...
A. 3 September 2011: I am in a LDR and they are a hard thing in general. In my opinion let go, he seems to be playing games with you. Don't contact him for a while (I know that's hard to do) but try it and see if he contact you. If not then just let him go and find ... (read in full...)
Should my brother have told me?
Q. I have been torned up about my ex's cheating thats why he is now my ex...but all through my 22 yrs of marriage I always thought we had a fairytale marriage until 4 years ago ...I was devastated to say the least.....so now we're separated I am ...
A. 3 September 2011: Your brother was in a hard situation, if he had told you would you have believed him? My guess is probably not, in most instances if a sibling tells another sibling that their partner is cheating, they are usually the one's who get treated as the ... (read in full...)
Should I contact him or let things be?
Q. There was a guy I knew for four years. I sort of liked him because he was always there for me when I needed it. He never judged me or anyone by their exterior and I feel like there was something there for me. I was super insecure so I let him go and ...
A. 3 September 2011: Last year I was in a situation where a man that I had feelings for, who was a great friend; I had lost contact with him and I wanted to contact him again. I added him on facebook and now we are a couple very much in love. My advice is add him and if ... (read in full...)
She says she can't get pregnant and its ok not to use condoms
Q. She says she can't have baby any more... Hello, the girl who I am going to have sex with told me that she can not have any more babies...she said it is safe for me to cum gallons of sperms inside her, and she doesn't want me to use condoms...sh...
A. 1 September 2011: My brother's girlfriend told him the same thing 5 years ago, they now have a 4 year old son (who is beautiful), but none the less do not believe her. Some women will say that just because they want a child or another child, so unless she has ... (read in full...)
Do I break up with my boyfriend?
Q. I'm extremely depressed. I told my boyfriend, and he sort of helps, says a few words of encouragement, but then if I dont pursue it, he will drop the topic. He has no idea how truly miserable I am, crying myself to sleep, dark thoughts, etc et...
A. 31 August 2011: I am a person who has had depression and is getting better. It is hard not only for you but for your boyfriend. Be honest with him as to how your feeling, also I suggest getting some help of your own. read books or find a support group. I understand ... (read in full...)
Are all woman like this? Or are some more faithful and genuine than my ex?
Q. I'm just wondering if I'm too trusting or maybe too innocent. I've only been involved in a relationships, on two separate occasions, each time with the same person. In each case she cheated on me with an ex boyfriend. In fact it turns out that s...
A. 31 August 2011: Not all women cheat, but unfortunately some do. It is hard, but you will find the girl for you. Unfortunately a lot of people both men and women treat other people's feelings as though they are unimportant, which is not the case at all, but they do ... (read in full...)
He says I was cheating while we were broken up
Q. I have been in a relationship with a guy for 4 years. We fought often but also had alot of fun together. We had broken up once, but we got back cos it was difficult to live without each other. In this time that we had broken up, I had a rebound with ...
A. 29 August 2011: Firstly, you didn't cheat at all, you were broken up which means you could do anything you wanted and getting back together doesn't change that. I personally would break up with him, he is using this so he can go back to treating you badly, which is ... (read in full...)
How do I tell her I am truly really faithful ? And avoid her getting mad at me again?
Q. I need help I know a guy at my age still had hormones and can't help but to notice a pretty girl. I have a girlfriend of 2 years and she can't stand it if I so much as look in a direction of another girl. She says her friends have boyfrien...
A. 28 August 2011: She says her friend's boyfriends never looks at other girls, she is either lying or very naieve, all men look at other women, and your right it doesn't mean that they want to be with that other woman. I suggest sitting her down and having a very ... (read in full...)
I fear I will never get pregnant. Am I being too pessimistic about this, despite my PolyCystic Ovarian Syndrone?
Q. I am 30 years old and for the last two years I have been feeling extremely broody. I have two younger sisters who have three children between them, I adore my nieces and nephew and spend all my spare time with them but I feel so empty sometimes when ...
A. 27 August 2011: My sister-in-law suffers from PCOS, and like you wanted a baby and felt lost. I myself have had a number of miscarriages and was told that I may never be able to carry a child to full term, or even make it past the first trimester. I know how ... (read in full...)
My ex-sister-in-law is planning to attend my father's memorial service and reception, while no one from my family wants her to. How do we ask her to stay away?
Q. My father's memorial service and reception will be next week and I just found out that my ex-sister-in-law is planning to attend and sit with the family. My father was very angry with this woman for what she did to my brother and their 2 young ...
A. 27 August 2011: My father passed away a couple of years ago, so I know how devastating it is. I would say just tell her calmly and honestly that your family would prefer that she not attend. Before doing so I would consider your brother's children first though. ... (read in full...)
I'm so insecure, please help!
Q. I love my boyfriend incredibly so and we have been dating for 6months, its a long distance relationship and I have became really insecure, I tried to hide it from my boyfriend but I can't anymore. I don't understand why but he told me that this girl ...
A. 26 August 2011: Long Distance relationships are very hard, but THEY CAN WORK. It is easy to get insecure when your not with them, I am in a long distance relationship, and it takes a lot of hard work. He told you about this woman from his work, so he is being ... (read in full...)
Could this mean anything other than the fact that my GF and this other guy slept together?? What else could "I got up after you left" mean?
Q. A question, tho I think I know the answer. Girl I have been seeing for a few months told me on Monday night she was going to visit an old friend (a guy). I was very suspicious. It was eating at me. We have not been dating so long and I dont know the...
A. 25 August 2011: Firstly, you should not have read her messages. That being said, the message you read means nothing. I have had texts between me and my best friend because she fell asleep while I was there, and I can guarantee you that we did not sleep together as ... (read in full...)
Am I the only woman not threated by porn?
Q. I just read an article about porn here on DC so it made me interested to post a question. Am I the only woman who is not threatened by porn? I mean, I read a lot of questions here about it, of ladies breaking up with their boyfriends and w...
A. 24 August 2011: I am not threatened by it either, I don't watch it myself as I don't like to, but I have no problem with my boyfriend watching it. In the end I am the one that he loves and wants to be with, so I couldn't care less if he watches it. He knows that ... (read in full...)
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